Fanny, if you do not consider this as an instance of a peculiar sort of perverseness? Why should he wish to restrain me from the virtuous pleasure of bestowing charity? or endeavour to persuade me that he was totally devoid of it himself? Chide me no longer, my sister, for what is much more

my misfortune, than my fault—and what a misfortune, at my time of life, to look forward to a length of years that must necessarily pass away,
" Joyless, loveless, unindeared!"
May you be happier far! dissipation must now be my resource; 'tis all that I have left—what a slight and worthless counterpoise for domestic felicity!

I will change the subject. We are to spend the Christmas at Southfield—Lord Lucan, Colonel Walter, and my Lucy, are to accompany us—next to yourself, she is the most agreeable companion I could have met with—her mind is as delicate as her form—and I can see that she is frequently hurt at the roughness of Sir William's manners, tho'

she takes infinite pains to conceal her feelings from me, on such occasions.—I once wished that Colonel Walter would have fallen in love with her, that I might have had the happiness of her living near me in the country, but I am now convinced that they were not formed to make each other happy; and that she woud have refused him, had he been an emperor.
She has made me her confidante—she loves, and is beloved, by one of the most charming men in the world; yet the odds are many against their ever being united.—I often tell her I envy her situation; for surely there is something infinitely delightful in suffering for, or with, an amiable person whom we love—it almost equals the happiness of sharing their good fortune!

I am sorry I did not sketch out Lord Lucan's portrait, while I was in the vein; but he is now so much altered, that my former idea of him would bear no resemblance to what he appears at present.—From the extreme of gaiety, he is fallen into a profound gravity, and sometimes appears gloomy and distrait—It is impossible to account for this change, as he is much liked and admired by every one who knows him; and I cannot conceive him to be in love, as he is hardly ever absent from our coterie, and I have never observed the least particularity in his behaviour or address to any member of it, tho' there are a number of pretty and agreeable women in our circle.
The Colonel perceives the alteration, as well as I, and seems to hint