hatred, I
have become an object of misery and abhorrence.
    The arrival of Mr. Falkland gave an alarming shock to the authority of Mr.
Tyrrel in the village assembly, and in all scenes of indiscriminate resort. His
disposition by no means inclined him to withhold himself from scenes of
fashionable amusement; and he and his competitor were like two stars fated never
to appear at once above the horizon. The advantages Mr. Falkland possessed in
the comparison are palpable; and, had it been otherwise, the subjects of his
rural neighbour were sufficiently disposed to revolt against his merciless
dominion. They had hitherto submitted from fear not from love; and, if they had
not rebelled, it was only for want of a leader. Even the ladies regarded Mr.
Falkland with particular complacence. His polished manners were particularly in
harmony with feminine delicacy. The sallies of his wit were far beyond those of
Mr. Tyrrel in variety and vigour; in addition to which they had the advantage of
having their spontaneous exuberance guided and restrained by the sagacity of a
cultivated mind. The graces of his person were enhanced by the elegance of his
deportment; and the benevolence and liberality of his temper were upon all
occasions conspicuous. It was common indeed to Mr. Tyrrel together with Mr.
Falkland to be little accessible to sentiments of awkwardness and confusion. But
for this Mr. Tyrrel was indebted to a self-satisfied effrontery and a boisterous
and overbearing elocution by which he was accustomed to discomfit his
assailants; while Mr. Falkland, with great ingenuity and candour of mind, was
enabled, by his extensive knowledge of the world and acquaintance with his own
resources, to perceive almost instantaneously the proceeding it most became him
to adopt.
    Mr. Tyrrel contemplated the progress of his rival with uneasiness and
aversion. He often commented upon it to his particular confidents as a thing
altogether inconceivable. Mr. Falkland he described as an animal that was
beneath contempt. Diminutive and dwarfish in his form, he wanted to set up a new
standard of human nature adapted to his miserable condition. He wished to
persuade people that the human species were made to be nailed to a chair, and to
pore over books. He would have them exchange those robust exercises which made
us joyous in the performance and vigorous in the consequences, for the wise
labour of scratching our heads for a rhyme and counting our fingers for a verse.
Monkeys were as good men as these. A nation of such animals would have no chance
with a single regiment of the old English votaries of beef and pudding. He never
saw any thing come of learning but to make