
for me, in spite of all temptation.
    In the summer he provided me with a house in the neighbourhood of his own;
but the accommodations being bad, and that country affording no other place fit
for my residence, he brought me home to his own seat, and by that step raised an
universal clamour, tho' I saw no company, and led such a solitary life, that
nothing but excessive love could have supported my spirits: not but that he gave
me as much of his time as he could possibly spare from the necessary duties of
paying and receiving visits, together with the avocations of hunting, and other
country amusements, which I could not partake. Formerly, indeed, I used to hunt
and shoot, but I had left off both; so that I was now reduced to the alternative
of reading and walking by myself: but, Love made up for all deficiencies to me,
who think nothing else worth the living for! - Had I been blessed with a partner
for life, who could have loved sincerely, and inspired me with a mutual flame, I
would have asked no more of fate. Interest and ambition have no share in my
composition; love which is pleasure, or pleasure which is love, makes up the
whole. A heart so disposed cannot be devoid of other good qualities; it must be
subject to the impressions of humanity and benevolence, and enemy to nothing but
itself. This you will give me leave to affirm, in justice to myself, as I have
frankly owned my failings and misconduct.
    Towards the end of summer my heart was a little alarmed by a report that
prevailed, of my lover's being actually engaged in a treaty of marriage:
however, I gave little credit to this rumour, till I was obliged to go to town
about business, and there I heard the same information confidently affirmed.
Tho' I still considered it as a vague surmise, I wrote to him an account of what
I had heard; and in his answer, which is still in my possession, he assured me,
with repeated vows and protestations, that the report was altogether false.
Satisfied with this declaration, I returned to his house; and tho' the tale was
incessantly thundered in my ears, still believed it void of all foundation, till
my suspicion was awaked by a very inconsiderable circumstance.
    One day, on his return from hunting, I perceived he had a very fine pair of
Dresden ruffles on his shirt, which I could not suppose he would wear at such a
rustic exercise; and therefore my fears immediately took the
