; where she had the Pleasure of
carving those Dishes which she had before attended at the Dressing. From these
Meals she retired about five Minutes after the other Servants, having only
stayed to drink the King over the Water. Such were, it seems, Mr. Western's
Orders: For it was a Maxim with him, that Women should come in with the first
Dish, and go out after the first Glass. Obedience to these Orders was perhaps no
difficult Task: For the Conversation (if it may be called so) was seldom such as
could entertain a Lady. It consisted chiefly of Hollowing, Singing, Relations of
sporting Adventures, B-d-y, and Abuse of Women and of the Government.
    These, however, were the only Seasons when Mr. Western saw his Wife: For
when he repaired to her Bed, he was generally so drunk that he could not see;
and in the sporting Season he always rose from her before it was light. Thus was
she perfect Mistress of her Time; and had besides a Coach and four usually at
her Command; tho' unhappily indeed the Badness of the Neighbourhood, and of the
Roads, made this of little Use: For none who had set much Value on their Necks
would have passed through the one, or who had set any Value on their Hours,
would have visited the other. Now to deal honestly with the Reader, she did not
make all the Return expected to so much Indulgence: For she had been married
against her Will, by a fond Father, the Match having been rather advantageous on
her Side: For the Squire's Estate was upwards of 3000 l. a Year, and her Fortune
no more than a bare 8000 l. Hence perhaps she had contracted a little Gloominess
of Temper: For she was rather a good Servant than a good Wife; nor had she
always the Gratitude to return the extraordinary Degree of roaring Mirth, with
which the Squire received her, even with a good-humoured Smile. She would,
moreover, sometimes interfere with Matters which did not concern her, as the
violent Drinking of her Husband, which in the gentlest Terms she would take some
of the few Opportunities he gave her of remonstrating against. And once in her
Life she very earnestly entreated him to carry her for two Months to London,
which he peremptorily denied; nay, was angry with his Wife for the Request ever
after, being well assured, that all the Husbands in London are Cuckolds.
    For this last, and many other good Reasons, Western at length heartily hated
his Wife;
