 do
not get the best of the bargain.«
    »No, but, my dear good Vernon, it's nonsensical,« said Sir Willoughby; »why
be bawling every day the names of men of letters?«
    »Philosophers.«
    »Well, philosophers.«
    »Of all countries and times. And they are the benefactors of humanity.«
    »Bene ...!« Sir Willoughby's derisive laugh broke the word. »There's a
pretension in all that, irreconcilable with English sound sense. Surely you see
it?«
    »We might,« said Vernon, »if you like, give alternative titles to the days,
or have alternating days, devoted to our great families that performed
meritorious deeds upon such a day.«
    The rebel Clara, delighting in his banter, was heard; »Can we furnish
sufficient?«
    »A poet or two could help us.«
    »Perhaps a statesman,« she suggested.
    »A pugilist, if wanted.«
    »For blowy days,« observed Dr. Middleton, and hastily in penitence picked up
the conversation he had unintentionally prostrated, with a general remark on
newfangled notions, and a word aside to Vernon; which created the blissful
suspicion in Clara, that her father was indisposed to second Sir Willoughby's
opinions even when sharing them.
    Sir Willoughby had led the conversation. Displeased that the lead should be
withdrawn from him, he turned to Clara and related one of the after-dinner
anecdotes of Dr. Corney; and another, with a vast deal of human nature in it,
concerning a valetudinarian gentleman, whose wife chanced to be desperately ill,
and he went to the physicians assembled in consultation outside the sick-room,
imploring them by all he valued, and in tears, to save the poor patient for him,
saying: »She is everything to me, everything, and if she dies I am compelled to
run the risks of marrying again; I must marry again; for she has accustomed me
so to the little attentions of a wife, that in truth I can't, I can't lose her!
She must be saved!« And the loving husband of any devoted wife wrung his hands.
    »Now, there, Clara, there you have the Egoist,« added Sir Willoughby. »That
is the perfect Egoist. You see what he comes to - and his wife! The man was
utterly unconscious of giving vent to the grossest selfishness.«
    »An Egoist!« said Clara.
    »Beware of marrying an Egoist, my dear!
