 honourable Samuel Slumkey, his blood being up, defied Horatio Fizkin,
Esquire, to mortal combat. At this violation of all known rules and precedents
of order, the Mayor commanded another fantasia on the bell, and declared that he
would bring before himself, both Horatio Fizkin, Esquire, of Fizkin Lodge, and
the honourable Samuel Slumkey, of Slumkey Hall, and bind them over to keep the
peace. Upon this terrific denunciation, the supporters of the two candidates
interfered, and after the friends of each party had quarrelled in pairs, for
three-quarters of an hour, Horatio Fizkin, Esquire, touched his hat to the
honourable Samuel Slumkey: the honourable Samuel Slumkey touched his to Horatio
Fizkin, Esquire: the band was stopped: the crowd were partially quieted: and
Horatio Fizkin, Esquire, was permitted to proceed.
    The speeches of the two candidates, though differing in every other respect,
afforded a beautiful tribute to the merit and high worth of the electors of
Eatanswill. Both expressed their opinion that a more independent, a more
enlightened, a more public-spirited, a more noble-minded, a more disinterested
set of men than those who had promised to vote for him, never existed on earth;
each darkly hinted his suspicions that the electors in the opposite interest had
certain swinish and besotted infirmities which rendered them unfit for the
exercise of the important duties they were called upon to discharge. Fizkin
expressed his readiness to do anything he was wanted; Slumkey, his determination
to do nothing that was asked of him. Both said that the trade, the manufactures,
the commerce, the prosperity of Eatanswill, would ever be dearer to their hearts
than any earthly object; and each had it in his power to state, with the utmost
confidence, that he was the man who would eventually be returned.
    There was a show of hands; the Mayor decided in favour of the honourable
Samuel Slumkey, of Slumkey Hall. Horatio Fizkin, Esquire, of Fizkin Lodge,
demanded a poll, and a poll was fixed accordingly. Then a vote of thanks was
moved to the Mayor for his able conduct in the chair; and the Mayor devoutly
wishing that he had had a chair to display his able conduct in (for he had been
standing during the whole proceedings), returned thanks. The processions
re-formed, the carriages rolled slowly through the crowd, and its members
screeched and shouted after them as their feelings or caprice dictated.
    During the whole time of the polling, the town was in a perpetual fever of
excitement. Everything was conducted on the most liberal and delightful scale.
