, if I had called him Rascal.« Much more she said, but not in his
Hearing: For having lighted his Pipe, he staggered off as fast as he could. We
shall therefore transcribe no more of her Speech, as it approached still nearer
and nearer to a Subject too indelicate to find any Place in this History.
    Early in the Morning, Partridge appeared at the Bedside of Jones, ready
equipped for the Journey, with his Knapsack at his Back. This was his own
Workmanship; for besides his other Trades, he was no indifferent Taylor. He had
already put up his whole Stock of Linnen in it, consisting of four Shirts, to
which he now added eight for Mr. Jones, and then packing up the Portmanteau, he
was departing with it towards his own House, but was stopt in his Way by the
Landlady, who refused to suffer any Removals till after the Payment of the
Reckoning.
    The Landlady was, as we have said, absolute Governess in these Regions; it
was therefore necessary to comply with her Rules, so the Bill was presently writ
out, which amounted to a much larger Sum than might have been expected, from the
Entertainment which Jones had met with; but here we are obliged to disclose some
Maxims, which Publicans hold to be the grand Mysteries of their Trade. The first
is, if they have any Thing good in their House (which indeed very seldom
happens) to produce it only to Persons who travel with great Equipages.
Secondly, To charge the same for the very worst Provisions, as if they were the
best. And, lastly, if any of their Guests call but for little, to make them pay
a double Price for every Thing they have; so that the Amount by the Head may be
much the same.
    The Bill being made and discharged, Jones set forward with Partridge
carrying his Knapsack; nor did the Landlady condescend to wish him a good
Journey: for this was, it seems, an Inn frequented by People of Fashion; and I
know not whence it is, but all those who get their Livelihood by People of
Fashion, contract as much Insolence to the rest of Mankind, as if they really
belonged to that Rank themselves.
 

                                  Chapter VIII

Jones arrives at Gloucester, and goes to the Bell; the Character of that House,
               and of a Petty-fogger, which he there meets with.
 
Mr. Jones, and Partridge, or Little Benjamin, (which Epithet of Little was
perhaps given him ironically, he being in reality near six Feet high) having
left their last Quarters in the
