 to Preferment; and whenever he begins to praise you to others or to your
self, you are from that Day forlorn. The worst Mark you can receive is a
Promise, especially when it is confirmed with an Oath; after which every wise
Man retires, and gives over all Hopes.
    There are three Methods by which a Man may rise to be Chief Minister: The
first is, by knowing how with Prudence to dispose of a Wife, a Daughter, or a
Sister: The second, by betraying or undermining his Predecessor: And the third
is, by a furious Zeal in publick Assemblies against the Corruptions of the
Court. But a wise Prince would rather chuse to employ those who practise the
last of these Methods; because such Zealots prove always the most obsequious and
subservient to the Will and Passions of their Master. That, these Ministers
having all Employments at their Disposal, preserve themselves in Power by
bribing the Majority of a Senate or great Council; and at last by an Expedient
called an Act of Indemnity (whereof I described the Nature to him) they secure
themselves from After-reckonings, and retire from the Publick, laden with the
Spoils of the Nation.
    The Palace of a Chief Minister, is a Seminary to breed up others in his own
Trade: The Pages, Lacquies, and Porter, by imitating their Master, become
Ministers of State in their several Districts, and learn to excel in the three
principal Ingredients, of Insolence, Lying, and Bribery. Accordingly, they have
a Subaltern Court paid to them by Persons of the best Rank; and sometimes by the
Force of Dexterity and Impudence, arrive through several Gradations to be
Successors to their Lord.
    He is usually governed by a decayed Wench, or favourite Footman, who are the
Tunnels through which all Graces are conveyed, and may properly be called, in
the last Resort, the Governors of the Kingdom.
    One Day, my Master, having heard me mention the Nobility of my Country, was
pleased to make me a Compliment which I could not pretend to deserve: That, he
was sure, I must have been born of some Noble Family, because I far exceeded in
Shape, Colour, and Cleanliness, all the Yahoos of his Nation, although I seemed
to fail in Strength, and Agility, which must be imputed to my different Way of
Living from those other Brutes; and besides, I was not only endowed with the
Faculty of Speech, but likewise with some Rudiments of Reason, to a Degree, that
with all his Acquaintance I passed for a Prodigy.
    He made me observe, that
