
art of crying, that is, to have their tears ready on all occasions: but this is
attained very easily by most. Some indeed arrive at the utmost perfection in
this art with incredible facility.«
    »No profession requires a deeper insight into human nature than the
beggar's. Their knowledge of the passions of men is so extensive, that I have
often thought it would be of no little service to a politician to have his
education among them. Nay, there is a much greater analogy between these two
characters than is imagined; for both concur in their first and grand principle,
it being equally their business to delude and impose on mankind. It must be
confessed that they differ widely in the degree of advantage which they make by
their deceit; for, whereas the beggar is contented with a little, the politician
leaves but a little behind.«
    »A very great English philosopher hath remarked our policy, in taking care
never to address any one with a title inferior to what he really claims. My
father was of the same opinion; for I remember when I was a boy, the pope
happening to pass by, I tended him with Pray, sir; For God's sake, sir; For the
Lord's sake, sir; - To which he answered gravely, Sirrah, sirrah, you ought to
be whipt for taking the Lord's name in vain; and in vain it was indeed, for he
gave me nothing. My father, overhearing this, took his advice, and whipt me very
severely. While I was under correction I promised often never to take the Lord's
name in vain any more. My father then said, Child, I do not whip you for taking
his name in vain; I whip you for not calling the pope his holiness.« »If all men
were so wise and good to follow the clergy's example, the nuisance of beggars
would soon be removed. I do not remember to have been above twice relieved by
them during my whole state of beggary. Once was by a very well-looking man, who
gave me a small piece of silver, and declared he had given me more than he had
left himself; the other was by a spruce young fellow, who had that very day
first put on his robes, whom I attended with Pray, reverend sir, good reverend
sir, consider your cloth. He answered, I do, child, consider my office, and I
hope all our cloth do the same. He then threw down some money, and strutted off
with great
