 any such paltry consideration - I am a
gentleman; and entered the service as other gentlemen do, with such hopes and
sentiments as honourable ambition inspires - If I have not been lucky in the
lottery of life, so neither do I think myself unfortunate - I owe to no man a
farthing; I can always command a clean shirt, a mutton-chop, and a truss of
straw; and when I die, I shall leave effects sufficient to defray the expence of
my burial.«
    My uncle assured him, he had no intention to give him the least offence, by
the observations he had made; but, on the contrary, spoke from a sentiment of
friendly regard to his interest - The lieutenant thanked him with a stiffness of
civility, which nettled our old gentleman, who perceived that his moderation was
all affected; for, whatsoever his tongue might declare, his whole appearance
denoted dissatisfaction - In short without pretending to judge of his military
merit, I think I may affirm, that this Caledonian is a self-conceited pedant,
aukward, rude, and disputacious - He has had the benefit of a school education,
seems to have read a good number of books, his memory is tenacious, and he
pretends to speak several different languages; but he is so addicted to
wrangling, that he will cavil at the clearest truths, and, in the pride of
argumentation, attempt to reconcile contradictions - Whether his address and
qualifications are really of that stamp which is agreeable to the taste of our
aunt, Mrs. Tabitha, or that indefatigable maiden is determined to shoot at every
sort of game, certain it is she has begun to practise upon the heart of the
lieutenant, who favoured us with his company to supper.
    I have many other things to say of this man of war, which I shall
communicate in a post or two; mean while, it is but reasonable that you should
be indulged with some respite from those weary lucubrations of
Yours,
                                                                      J. MELFORD
    Newcastle upon Tyne, July 10.
 

             To Sir Watkin Phillips, Bart. of Jesus college, Oxon.

Dear Phillips,
    In my last I treated you with a high flavoured dish, in the character of the
Scotch lieutenant, and I must present him once more for your entertainment. It
was our fortune to feed upon him the best part of three days; and I do not doubt
that he will start again in our way before we shall have finished our northern
excursion. The day after our meeting with him at Durham proved so tempestuous
that we did not choose to proceed on our journey; and my uncle persuaded
