 

                                  Daniel Defoe

            The Fortunes and Misfortunes of the famous Moll Flanders

My True Name is so well known in the Records, or Registers at Newgate, and in
the Old Bailey, and there are some things of such Consequence still depending
there, relating to my particular Conduct, that it is not to be expected I should
set my Name, or the Account of my Family to this Work; perhaps, after my Death
it may be better known, at present it would not be proper, no, not tho' a
general Pardon should be issued, even without Exceptions of Persons or Crimes.
    It is enough to tell you, that as some of my worst Comrades, who are out of
the Way of doing me Harm, having gone out of the World by the Steps, and the
String; as I often expected to go, knew me by the Name of Moll Flanders; so you
may give me leave to go under that Name till I dare own who I have been, as well
as who I am.
    I have been told, that in one of our Neighbour Nations, whether it be in
France, or where else, I know not, they have an Order from the King, that when
any Criminal is condemn'd, either to Dye, or to the Gallies, or to be
Transported, if they leave any Children, as such are generally unprovided for,
by the Forfeiture of their Parents, so they are immediately taken into the Care
of the Government, and put into an Hospital call'd the House of Orphans, where
they are Bred up, Cloath'd, Fed, Taught, and when fit to go out, are placed to
Trades, or to Services, so as to be well able to provide for themselves by an
honest industrious Behaviour.
    Had this been the Custom in our Country, I had not been left a poor desolate
Girl without Friends, without clothes, without Help or Helper, as was my Fate;
and by which, I was not only expos'd to very great Distresses, even before I was
capable, either of understanding my Case, or how to amend it, but brought into a
Course of Life, scandalous in itself, and which in its ordinary Course, tended
to the swift Destruction both of Soul and Body.
    But the Case was otherwise here, my Mother was convicted of Felony for a
petty Theft, scarce worth naming, viz. borrowing three Pieces of fine Holland,
of a certain Draper in Cheap-side: The Circumstances are too long to repeat, and
I have heard them related so many Ways, that I can scarce tell which is the
right Account.
    However it was, they all agree in this, that my Mother pleaded her Belly,
and being found quick with Child, she was respited for about Seven Months; after
which she was call'd down, as they term it, to her former judgement, but obtain'd
the Favour afterwards of being Transported to the Plantations, and left me about
Half a Year old; and in bad Hands you may be sure.
    This is too near the first Hours of my Life, for me to relate anything of my
self, but by hearsay; 'tis enough to mention, that as I was born in such an
unhappy Place, I had no Parish to have recourse to for my Nourishment in my
Infancy, nor can I give the least Account how I was kept alive; other, than
that, as I have been told, some Relation of my Mother took me away, but at whose
Expense, or by whose Direction I know nothing at all of it.
    The first Account that I can Recollect, or could ever learn of my self, was
that I had wander'd among a Crew of those People they call Gypsies, or Egyptians
; but I believe it was but a little while that I had been among them, for I had
not had my Skin discoloured, as they do to all Children they carry about with
them, nor can I tell how I came among them, or how I got from them.
    It was at Colchester in Essex, that those People left me; and I have a
Notion in my Head, that I left them there, (that is, that I hid my self and
would not go any farther with them) but I am not able to be particular in that
Account; only this I remember, that being taken up by some of the Parish
Officers of Colchester, I gave an Account, that I came into the Town with the
Gypsies, but that I would not go any farther with them, and that so they had
left me, but whither they were gone that I knew not, for tho' they sent round
the Country to enquire after them, it seems, they could not be found.
    I was now in a Way to be provided for; for tho' I was not a Parish Charge
upon this, or that Part of the Town by Law; yet as my Case came to be known, and
that I was too young to do any Work, being not above three Years old, Compassion
mov'd the Magistrates of the Town to take Care of me, and I became one of their
own as much as if I had been born in the Place.
    In the Provision they made for me, it was my good hap to be put to Nurse, as
they call it, to a Woman who was indeed Poor, but had been in better
Circumstances, and who got a little Livelihood by taking such as I was suppose'd
to be; and keeping them with all Necessaries, till they were at a certain Age,
in which it might be suppose'd they might go to Service, or get their own Bread.
    This Woman had also a little School, which she kept to teach Children to
Read and to Work; and having, I say, liv'd before that in good Fashion, she bred
up the Children with a great deal of Art, as well as with a great deal of Care.
    But which was worth all the rest, she bred them up very Religiously also,
being herself a very sober, pious Woman. (2.) Very Housewifely and Clean, and,
(3.) Very Mannerly, and with good Behaviour: So that excepting a plain Diet,
coarse Lodging, and mean clothes, we were brought up as Mannerly as if we had
been at the Dancing School.
    I was continue'd here till I was eight Years Old, when I was terrified with
News, that the Magistrates (as I think they call'd them) had ordered that I
should go to Service; I was able to do but very little wherever I was to go,
except it was to run of Errands, and be a Drudge to some Cook-Maid, and this
they told me of often, which put me into a great Fright; for I had a thorough
Aversion to going to Service, as they call'd it, tho' I was so young; and I told
my Nurse, that I believe'd I could get my Living without going to Service if she
pleased to let me; for she had Taught me to Work with my Needle, and Spin
Worsted, which is the chief Trade of that City, and I told her that if she would
keep me, I would Work for her, and I would Work very hard.
    I talk'd to her almost every Day of Working hard; and in short I did nothing
but Work and Cry all Day, which grieved the good kind Woman so much, that at
last she began to be concern'd for me, for she love'd me very well.
    One Day after this, as she came into the Room, where all the poor Children
were at Work, she sat down just over against me, not in her usual Place as
Mistress, but as if she had set herself on purpose to observe me, and see me
Work; I was doing something she had set me to, as I remember it was Marking some
Shirts, which she had taken to Make, and after a while she began to Talk to me:
Thou foolish Child, says she, thou art always Crying, (for I was Crying then)
Prithee, What do'st Cry for? because they will take me away, says I, and put me
to Service, and I can't work House-Work; well, Child, says she, but tho' you
can't work House-Work you will learn it in time, and they won't put you to hard
Things at first; yes they will, says I, and if I can't do it, they will Beat me,
and the Maids will Beat me to make me do great Work, and I am but a little Girl,
and I can't do it, and then I cry'd again, till I could not speak any more.
    This mov'd my good Motherly Nurse, so that she resolve'd I should not go to
Service yet, so she bid me not Cry, and she would speak to Mr. Mayor, and I
should not go to Service till I was bigger.
    Well, this did not satisfy me, for to think of going to Service at all was
such a frightful Thing to me, that if she had assured me I should not have gone
till I was 20 Years Old, it would have been the same to me, I should have cry'd
all the time, with the very Apprehension of its being to be so at last.
    When she saw that I was not pacified yet, she began to be angry with me, and
what would you have says she, don't I tell you that you shall not go to Service
till you are bigger? Ay, says I, but then I must go at last. Why, what, said she
, is the Girl Mad? what would you be a Gentlewoman? Yes, says I, and cry'd
heartily till I roar'd out again.
    This set the old Gentlewoman a Laughing at me, as you may be sure it would:
Well, Madam, Forsooth, says she, Gibing at me, you would be a Gentlewoman, and
how will you come to be a Gentlewoman? What will you do it by your Fingers Ends?
    Yes, says I again, very innocently.
    Why, what can you Earn, says she, what can you get a Day at your Work?
    Three Pence, said I, when I Spin, and Four Pence when I Work plain Work.
    Alas! Poor Gentlewoman, said she again, Laughing, what will that do for
thee?
    It will keep me, says I, if you will let me live with you; and this I said
in such a poor Petitioning Tone, that it made the poor Woman's Heart yearn to
me, as she told me afterwards.
    But, says she, that will not keep you and buy you clothes too; and who must
buy the little Gentlewoman clothes, says she, and smile'd all the while at me.
    I will Work harder then, says I, and you shall have it all.
    Poor Child! It won't keep you, said she, it will hardly find you in
Victuals.
    Then I would have no Victuals, says I again, very Innocently, let me but
live with you.
    Why, Can you live without Victuals? says she; yes, again says I, very much
like a Child, you may be sure, and still I cry'd heartily.
    I had no Policy in all this, you may easily see it was all Nature, but it
was joined with so much Innocence, and so much Passion, That in short, it set
the good Motherly Creature a weeping too, and at last she cry'd as fast as I
did, and then took me, and lead me out of the Teaching Room; Come, says she, you
shan't go to Service, you shall live with me, and this pacify'd me for the
present.
    After this, she going to wait on the Mayor, my Story came up, and my good
Nurse told Mr. Mayor the whole Tale; He was so pleased with it, that he would
call his Lady, and his Two Daughters to hear it, and it made Mirth enough among
them, you may be sure.
    However, not a Week had passed over, but on a sudden comes Mrs. Mayoress,
and her Two Daughters to the House to see my old Nurse, and to see her School
and the Children: When they had looked about them a little: Well Mrs.-, says the
Mayoress to my Nurse; and pray which is the little Lass that is to be a
Gentlewoman? I heard her, and I was terrible frighted, tho' I did not know why
neither; but Mrs. Mayoress comes up to me, Well Miss, says she. And what are you
at Work upon? The Word Miss was a Language that had hardly been heard of in our
School, and I wonder'd what sad Name it was she call'd me; However, I stood up,
made a Court'sy, and she took my Work out of my Hand, look'd on it, and said it
was very well; then she look'd upon one of my Hands, nay, she may come to be a
Gentlewoman, says she, for ought I know; she has a Lady's Hand, I assure you:
This pleased me mightily; but Mrs. Mayoress did not stop there, but put her Hand
in her Pocket, gave me a Shilling, and bid me mind my Work, and learn to Work
well, and I might be a Gentlewoman for ought she knew.
    All this while, my good old Nurse, Mrs. Mayoress, and all the rest of them,
did not understand me at all, for they meant one Sort of thing by the Word
Gentlewoman, and I meant quite another: for alas, all I understood by being a
Gentlewoman, was to be able to Work for myself, and get enough to keep me
without going to Service, whereas they meant to live Great and High, and I know
not what.
    Well, after Mrs. Mayoress was gone, her two Daughters came in, and they
call'd for the Gentlewoman too, and they talk'd a long while to me, and I
answered them in my Innocent way; but always if they ask'd me whether I resolved
to be a Gentlewoman, I answer'd, Yes: At last they ask'd me, what a Gentlewoman
was? That puzzel'd me much; however, I explain'd my self negatively, that it was
one that did not go to Service, to do House-Work; they were mightily pleased,
and lik'd my little Prattle to them, which it seems was agreeable enough to
them, and they gave me Money too.
    As for my Money, I gave it all to my Mistress Nurse, as I call'd her, and
told her, she should have all I got when I was a Gentlewoman, as well as now; by
this and some other of my talk, my old Tuteress began to understand what I meant
by being a Gentlewoman; and that it was no more, than to be able to get my Bread
by my own Work, and at last, she ask'd me whether it was not so.
    I told her, Yes, and insisted on it, that to do so, was to be a Gentlewoman;
for, says I, there is such a one, naming a Woman that mended Lace, and wash'd
the Ladies Lac'd-heads; she, says I, is a Gentlewoman, and they call her Madam.
    Poor Child, says my good old Nurse, you may soon be such a Gentlewoman as
that, for she is a Person of ill Fame, and has had two Bastards.
    I did not understand anything of that; but I answered, I am sure they call
her Madam, and she does not go to Service nor do House-Work, and therefore I
insisted, that she was a Gentlewoman, and I would be such a Gentlewoman as that.
    The Ladies were told all this again, and they made themselves Merry with it,
and every now and then Mr. Mayor's Daughters would come and see me, and ask
where the little Gentlewoman was, which made me not a little Proud of my self
besides. I was often visited by these young Ladies, and sometimes they brought
others with them; so that I was known by it, almost all over the Town.
    I was now about Ten Years old, and began to look a little Womanish, for I
was mighty Grave, very Mannerly, and as I had often heard the Ladies say I was
Pretty, and would be very Handsome, you may be sure it made me not a little
Proud: However, that Pride had no ill Effect upon me yet, only as they often
gave me Money, and I gave it my old Nurse, she, honest Woman, was so just as to
lay it out again for me, and gave me Head-Dresses, and Linnen, and Gloves, and I
went very Neat, for if I had Rags on, I would always be Clean, or else I would
dabble them in Water my self; but I say, my good Nurse, when I had Money given
me, very honestly laid it out for me, and would always tell the Ladies this, or
that, was bought with their Money; and this made them give me more, till at
last, I was indeed call'd upon by the Magistrates to go out to Service; but then
I was become so good a Workwoman my self, and the Ladies were so kind to me,
that I was past it; for I could Earn as much for my Nurse as was enough to keep
me; so she told them, that if they would give her leave, she would keep the
Gentlewoman, as she call'd me, to be her Assistant, and teach the Children,
which I was very well able to do; for I was very nimble at my Work, tho' I was
yet very young.
    But the Kindness of the Ladies did not end here, for when they understood
that I was no more maintain'd by the Town as before, they gave me Money oftener;
and as I grew up, they brought me Work to do for them; such as Linnen to Make,
Laces to Mend, and Heads to Dress up, and not only paid me for doing them, but
even taught me how to do them; so that I was a Gentlewoman indeed, as I
understood that Word; for before I was Twelve Years old, I not only found myself
clothes, and paid my Nurse for my keeping, but got Money in my Pocket too.
    The Ladies also gave me clothes frequently of their own or their Childrens;
some Stockings, some Petticoats, some Gowns, some one thing, some another, and
these my old Woman managed for me like a Mother, and kept them for me, obliged
me to mend them, and turn them to the best Advantage, for she was a rare
House-Wife.
    At last one of the Ladies took such a Fancy to me, that she would have me
Home to her House, for a Month, she said, to be among her Daughters.
    Now tho' this was exceeding kind in her, yet as my good Woman said to her,
unless she resolve'd to keep me for good and all, she would do the little
Gentlewoman more harm than good: Well, says the Lady, that's true, I'll only
take her Home for a Week then, that I may see how my Daughters and she agree,
and how I like her Temper, and then I'll tell you more; and in the mean time, if
any Body comes to see her as they used to do, you may only tell them, you have
sent her out to my House.
    This was prudently managed enough, and I went to the Lady's House, but I was
so pleased there with the young Ladies, and they so pleased with me, that I had
enough to do to come away, and they were as unwilling to part with me.
    However, I did come away, and liv'd almost a Year more with my honest old
Woman, and began now to be very helpful to her; for I was almost fourteen Years
old, was tall of my Age, and look'd a little Womanish; but I had such a taste of
Genteel living at the Lady's House, that I was not so easy in my old Quarters as
I us'd to be, and I thought it was fine to be a Gentlewoman indeed, for I had
quite other Notions of a Gentlewoman now, than I had before; and as I thought
that it was fine to be a Gentlewoman, so I love'd to be among Gentlewomen, and
therefore I long'd to be there again.
    When I was about fourteen Years and a quarter Old, my good old Nurse, Mother
I ought to call her, fell Sick and Dy'd; I was then in a sad Condition indeed,
for as there is no great Bustle in putting an End to a poor Body's Family, when
once they are carried to the Grave; so the poor good Woman being Buried, the
Parish Children were immediately remove'd by the Church-Wardens; the School was
at an End, and the Day-Children of it had no more to do but just stay at Home,
till they were sent some where else; as for what she left, a Daughter, a married
Woman, came and swept it all away, and removing the Goods, they had no more to
say to me than to Jest with me, and tell me, that the little Gentlewoman might
set up for herself, if she pleased.
    I was frighted out of my Wits almost, and knew not what to do; for I was, as
it were, turn'd out of Doors to the wide World, and that which was still worse,
the old honest Woman had two and Twenty Shillings of mine in her Hand, which was
all the Estate the little Gentlewoman had in the World; and when I ask'd the
Daughter for it, she huft me, and told me, she had nothing to do with it.
    It was true the good poor Woman had told her Daughter of it, and that it lay
in such a Place, that it was the Child's Money, and had call'd once or twice for
me to give it me, but I was unhappily out of the way, and when I came back she
was past being in a Condition to speak of it: However, the Daughter was so
Honest afterwards, as to give it me, tho' at first she us'd me Cruelly about it.
    Now was I a poor Gentlewoman indeed, and I was just that very Night to be
turn'd into the wide World; for the Daughter remove'd all the Goods, and I had
not so much as a Lodging to go to, or a bit of Bread to Eat: But it seems some
of the Neighbours took so much Compassion of me, as to acquaint the Lady in
whose Family I had been; and immediately she sent her Maid to fetch me; and away
I went with them Bag and Baggage, and with a glad Heart you may be sure: The
fright of my Condition had made such an Impression upon me, that I did not want
now to be a Gentlewoman, but was very willing to be a Servant, and that any kind
of Servant they thought fit to have me be.
    But my new generous Mistress had better Thoughts for me. I call her
generous, for she exceeded the good Woman I was with before in every Thing, as
in Estate; I say, in every Thing except Honesty; and for that, tho' this was a
Lady most exactly Just, yet I must not forget to say on all Occasions, that the
first, tho' Poor, was as uprightly Honest as it was possible.
    I was no sooner carried away as I have said by this good Gentlewoman, but
the first Lady, that is to say, the Mayoress that was, sent her Daughters to
take care of me; and another Family which had taken Notice of me when I was the
little Gentlewoman, sent for me after her, so that I was mightily made of; nay,
and they were not a little Angry, especially the Mayoress, that her Friend had
taken me away from her; for as she said, I was hers by Right, she having been
the first that took any Notice of me; but they that had me, would not part with
me; and as for me I could not be better than where I was.
    Here I continued till I was between 17 and 18 Years old, and here I had all
the Advantages for my Education, that could be imagined; the Lady had Masters
home to teach her Daughters to Dance, and to speak French, and to Write, and
others to teach them Musick; and as I was always with them, I learn'd as fast as
they; and tho' the Masters were not appointed to teach me, yet I learn'd by
Imitation and Enquiry, all that they learn'd by Instruction and Direction. So
that in short, I learned to Dance and speak French as well as any of them, and
to Sing much better, for I had a better Voice than any of them; I could not so
readily come at playing the Harpsicord or Spinnet, because I had no Instrument
of my own to Practise on, and could only come at theirs in the Intervals when
they left it; but yet I learned tollerably well, and the young Ladies at length
got two Instruments, that is to say, a Harpsicord and a Spinnet too, and then
they Taught me themselves; but as to Dancing they could hardly help my learning
Country Dances, because they always wanted me to make up even Number; and on the
other Hand, they were as heartily willing to learn me everything that they had
been Taught themselves, as I could be to take the Learning.
    By this Means I had, as I have said, all the Advantages of Education that I
could have had, if I had been as much a Gentlewoman as they were, with whom I
liv'd; and in some things I had the Advantage of my Ladies, tho' they were my
Superiors, Viz. that mine were all the Gifts of Nature, and which all their
Fortunes could not furnish. First, I was apparently Handsomer than any of them.
Secondly, I was better shap'd, and Thirdly, I Sung better, by which I mean, I
had a better Voice; in all which you will, I hope, allow me to say, I do not
speak my own Conceit, but the Opinion of all that knew the Family.
    I had with all these the common Vanity of my Sex, Viz. that being really
taken for very Handsome, or if you please for a great Beauty, I very well knew
it, and had as good an Opinion of my self, as any Body else could have of me,
and particularly I loved to hear any Body speak of it, which happened often, and
was a great Satisfaction to me.
    Thus far I have had a smooth Story to tell of my self, and in all this Part
of my Life, I not only had the Reputation of living in a very good Family, and a
Family Noted and Respected every where for Vertue and Sobriety, and for every
valuable Thing; but I had the Character too of a very sober, modest, and
vertuous young Woman, and such I had always been; neither had I yet any Occasion
to think of any thing else, or to know what a Temptation to Wickedness meant.
    But that which I was too vain of, was my Ruin, or rather my Vanity was the
Cause of it. The Lady in the House where I was, had two Sons, young Gentlemen of
Extraordinary Parts and Behaviour; and it was my Misfortune to be very well with
them both, but they managed themselves with me in a quite different Manner.
    The eldest a gay Gentleman, that knew the Town, as well as the Country, and
tho' he had Levity enough to do an ill-natured thing, yet had too much judgement
of things to pay too dear for his Pleasures; he began with that unhappy Snare to
all Women, Viz. taking Notice upon all Occasions how pretty I was, as he call'd
it, how agreeable, how well Carriaged, and the like; and this he contrive'd so
subtilly, as if he had known as well how to catch a Woman in his Net, as a
Partridge when he went a Setting; for he would contrive to be talking this to
his Sisters, when tho' I was not by, yet when he knew I was not so far off, but
that I should be sure to hear him: His Sisters would return softly to him, hush
Brother, she will hear your, she is but in the next Room; then he would put it
off, and talk softlier as if he had not known it, and begin to acknowledge he
was Wrong; and then as if he had forgot himself, he would speak aloud again, and
I that was so well pleased to hear it, was sure to Listen for it upon all
Occasions.
    After he had thus baited his Hook, and found easily enough the Method how to
lay it in my Way, he play'd an open Game; and one Day going by his Sister's
Chamber when I was there, he comes in with an Air of Gaiety, O! Mrs. Betty, said
he to me, How do you do Mrs. Betty? don't your Cheeks burn Mrs. Betty? I made a
Court'sy, and blush'd, but said nothing; What makes you talk so, Brother? says
the Lady, Why, says he, we have been talking of her below Stairs this half Hour;
Well, says his Sister, you can say no Harm of her, that I am sure, so 'tis no
matter what you have been talking about; nay, says he, 'tis so far from talking
Harm of her, that we have been talking a great deal of good, and a great many
fine Things have been said of Mrs. Betty, I assure you; and particularly, that
she is the Handsomest young Woman in Colchester, and, in short, they begin to
Toast her Health in the Town.
    I wonder at you Brother, says the Sister, Betty wants but one Thing, but she
had as good want every Thing, for the Market is against our Sex just now; and if
a young Woman has Beauty, Birth, Breeding, Wit, Sense, Manners, Modesty, andall
to an Extream; yet if she has not Money, she's no Body, she had as good want
them all; nothing but Money now recommends a Woman; the Men play the Game all
into their own Hands.
    Her younger Brother, who was by, cry'd, Hold Sister, you run too fast, I am
an Exception to your Rule: I assure you, if I find a Woman so accomplish'd as
you Talk of, I won't trouble my self about the Money. O, says the Sister, but
you will take Care not to Fancy one then without the Money.
    You don't know that neither, says the Brother.
    But why Sister, (says the Elder Brother) why do you exclaim so about the
Fortune? you are none of them that want a Fortune, what ever else you want.
    I understand you, Brother, (replies the Lady very smartly) you suppose I
have the Money and want the Beauty; but as Times go now, the first will do, so I
have the better of my Neighbours.
    Well, says the younger Brother, but your Neighbours may be even with you;
for Beauty will steal a Husband sometimes in spite of Money; and when the Maid
chances to be Handsomer than the Mistress, she oftentimes makes as good a
Market, and rides in a Coach before her.
    I thought it was time for me to withdraw, and I did so; but not so far, but
that I heard all their Discourse, in which I heard abundance of fine things said
of my self, which prompted my Vanity, but, as I soon found, was not the way to
increase my Interest in the Family, for the Sister and the younger Brother fell
grievously out about it; and as he said some very disobliging things to her,
upon my Account, so I could easily see that she resented them, by her future
Conduct to me, which indeed was very unjust; for I had never had the least
thought of what she suspected, as to her younger Brother: Indeed the elder
Brother in his distant remote Way had said a great many things as in Jest, which
I had the Folly to believe were in Earnest, or to flatter my self with the Hopes
of what I ought to have suppose'd he never intended.
    It happened one Day that he came running up Stairs, towards the Room where
his Sister us'd to sit and work, as he often us'd to do; and calling to them
before he came in, as was his way too, I being there alone, step'd to the Door,
and said, Sir, the Ladies are not here, they are walk'd down the Garden: as I
step'd forward to say this, he was just got to the Door, and clasping me in his
Arms, as if it had been by Chance, O! Mrs. Betty, says he, are you here? that's
better still, I want to speak with you, more than I do with them, and then
having me in his Arms he kiss'd me three or four times.
    I struggled to get away, and yet did it but faintly neither, and he held me
fast, and still kiss'd me, till he was out of Breath, and, sitting down, says
he, dear Betty, I am in Love with you.
    His Words, I must confess, fir'd my Blood; all my Spirits flew about my
Heart, and put me into Disorder enough: He repeated it afterwards several times,
that he was in Love with me, and my Heart spoke as plain as a Voice, that I
lik'd it; nay, whenever he said, I am in Love with you, my Blushes plainly
reply'd wou'd you were, Sir. However nothing else pass'd at that time; it was
but a Surprise, and I soon recover'd my self. He had stay'd longer with me, but
he happen'd to look out at the Window and see his Sisters coming up the Garden,
so he took his Leave, kiss'd me again, told me he was very serious, and I should
hear more of him very quickly, and away he went infinitely pleas'd, and had
there not been one Misfortune in it, I had been in the Right, but the Mistake
lay here, that Mrs Betty was in Earnest, and the Gentleman was not.
    From this time my Head run upon strange Things, and I may truly say, I was
not my self, to have such a Gentleman talk to me of being in Love with me, and
of my being such a charming Creature, as he told me I was, these were things I
knew not how to bear, my Vanity was elevated to the last Degree: It is true, I
had my Head full of Pride, but knowing nothing of the Wickedness of the times, I
had not one Thought of my Virtue about me; and had my young Master offer'd it at
first Sight, he might have taken any Liberty he thought fit with me; but he did
not see his Advantage, which was my Happiness for that time.
    It was not long, but he found an Opportunity to catch me again, and almost
in the same Posture, indeed it had more of Design in it on his Part, tho' not on
my Part; it was thus, The young Ladies were gone a Visiting with their Mother;
his Brother was out of Town, and as for his Father he had been at London for a
Week before; he had so well watch'd me, that he knew where I was, tho' I did not
so much as know that he was in the House, and he briskly comes up the Stairs,
and seeing me at Work, comes into the Room to me directly, and began just as he
did before, with taking me in his Arms, and kissing me for almost a quarter of
an Hour together.
    It was his younger Sister's Chamber that I was in, and as there was no Body
in the House but the Maid below Stairs, he was it may be the ruder: In short, he
began to be in Earnest with me indeed; perhaps he found me a little too easy,
for I made no Resistance to him while he only held me in his Arms and kiss'd me;
indeed I was too well pleased with it, to resist him much.
    Well tir'd with that kind of Work, we sat down, and there he talk'd with me
a great while; he said, he was charm'd with me, and that he could not rest till
he had told me how he was in Love with me, and if I could Love him again, and
would make him happy, I should be the saving of his Life; and many such fine
Things. I said little to him again, but easily discovered that I was a Fool, and
that I did not in the least perceive what he meant.
    Then he walked about the Room, and taking me by the Hand, I walk'd with him;
and by and by taking his Advantage, he threw me down upon the Bed, and kissed me
there most Violently; but to give him his Due, offered no manner of Rudeness to
me, only kiss'd me a great while; after this he thought he had heard some Body
come up Stairs, so he got off from the Bed, lifted me up, professing a great
deal of Love for me, but told me it was all an honest Affection, and that he
meant no ill to me, and with that put five Guineas into my Hand, and went down
Stairs.
    I was more confounded with the Money than I was before with the Love; and
began to be so elevated, that I scarce knew the Ground I stood on: I am the more
particular in this, that if it comes to be read by any innocent young Body, they
may learn from it to guard themselves against the Mischiefs which attend an
early Knowledge of their own Beauty; if a young Woman once thinks herself
Handsome, she never doubts the Truth of any Man that tells her he is in Love
with her; for if she believes herself Charming enough to captivate him, 'tis
natural to expect the Effects of it.
    This Gentleman had now fir'd his Inclination, as much as he had my Vanity,
and as if he had found that he had an Opportunity, and was sorry he did not take
hold of it, he comes up again in about half an Hour, and falls to work with me
again just as he did before, only with a little less Introduction.
    And First, when he entered the Room, he turn'd about, and shut the Door.
Mrs. Betty, said he, I fancy'd before, some Body was coming up Stairs, but it
was not so; However, adds he, if they find me in the Room with you, they shan't
catch me a kissing of you. I told him I did not know who should be coming up
Stairs, for I believed there was no Body in the House, but the Cook, and the
other Maid, and they never came up those Stairs; well, my Dear, says he, Tis
good to be sure however, and so he sits down and we began to talk; and now, tho
I was still on fire with his first Visit, and said little, he did as it were put
Words in my Mouth, telling me how passionately he love'd me, and that tho' he
could not till he came to his Estate, yet he was resolve'd to make me happy then,
and himself too; that is to say, to marry me, and abundance of such things,
which I poor Fool did not understand the drift of, but acted as if there was no
kind of Love, but that which tended to Matrimony; and if he had spoken of that,
I had no Room, as well as no Power, to have said No; but we were not come to
that length yet.
    We had not sat long, but he got up, and stopping my very Breath with Kisses,
threw me upon the Bed again; but then he went further with me than Decency
permits me to mention, nor had it been in my Power to have deny'd him at that
Moment, had he offered much more than he did.
    However, tho' he took these Freedoms with me, it did not go to that, which
they call the last Favour, which, to do him Justice, he did not attempt; and he
made that Self-denial of his a Plea for all his Freedoms with me up on other
Occasions after this: When this was over, he stay'd but a little while, but he
put almost a Handful of Gold in my Hand, and left me a thousand Protestations of
his Passion for me, and of his loving me above all the Women in the World.
    It will not be strange, if I now began to think; but alas! it was but with
very little solid Reflections: I had a most unbounded Stock of Vanity and Pride,
and but a very little Stock of Virtue: I did indeed cast sometimes with my self
what my young Master aim'd at, but thought of nothing but the fine Words and the
Gold; whether he intended to marry me, or not, seem'd a Matter of no great
Consequence to me; nor did I so much as think of making any Capitulation for my
self, 'till he made a kind of formal Proposal to me, as you shall hear
presently.
    Thus I gave up my self to Ruin without the least Concern, and am a fair
Memento to all young Women, whose Vanity prevails over their Virtue: Nothing was
ever so stupid on both Sides, had I acted as became me, and resisted as Virtue
and Honour require'd, he had either desisted his Attacks, finding no room to
expect the end of his Design, or had made fair and honourable Proposals of
Marriage; in which Case, whoever blam'd him, no Body could have blam'd me. In
short, if he had known me, and how easy the Trifle he aim'd at, was to be had,
he would have troubled his Head no farther, but have given me four or five
Guineas, and have lain with me the next time he had come at me: On the other
Hand, if I had known his Thoughts, and how hard he supposed I would be to be
gain'd, I might have made my own Terms, and if I had not capitulated for an
immediate Marriage, I might for a Maintainance till Marriage, and might have had
what I would: for he was Rich to Excess, besides what he had in Expectation; but
I had wholly abandoned all such Thoughts, and was taken up only with the Pride
of my Beauty, and of being belove'd by such a Gentleman: as for the Gold, I spent
whole Hours in looking upon it; I told the Guineas over a Thousand times a Day:
Never poor vain Creature was so wrapt up with every Part of the Story, as I was
not considering what was before me, and how near my Ruin was at the Door; and
indeed I think, I rather wished for that Ruin, than studied to avoid it.
    In the mean time, however, I was cunning enough, not to give the least room
to any in the Family to imagine that I had the least Correspondence with him; I
scarce ever look'd towards him in public, or answer'd if he spoke to me; when,
but for all that, we had every now and then a little Encounter, where we had
room for a Word or two, and now and then a Kiss, but no fair Opportunity for the
Mischief intended; and especially considering that he made more Circumlocution,
than he had occasion for, and the Work appearing Difficult to him, he really
made it so.
    But as the Devil is an unwearied Tempter, so he never fails to find an
Opportunity for the Wickedness he invites to: It was one Evening that I was in
the Garden, with his two younger Sisters, and himself, when he found Means to
convey a Note into my Hand, by which he told me that he would to Morrow desire
me publicly to go of an Errand for him, and that I should see him somewhere by
the Way.
    Accordingly after Dinner, he very gravely says to me, his Sisters being all
by, Mrs. Betty, I must ask a Favour of you: What's that? says the Second Sister;
nay Sister, says he, very gravely, If you can't spare Mrs. Betty to Day, any
other time will do; Yes, they said, they could, spare her well enough, and the
Sister beg'd Pardon for asking; Well, but says the eldest Sister, you must tell
Mrs. Betty what it is; if it be any private Business that we must not hear, you
may call her out, there she is; Why Sister, says the Gentleman very gravely,
What do you mean? I only desire her to go into the High-street (and then he
pulls out a Turn-over), to such a Shop; and then he tells them a long Story of
two fine Neckcloths he had bid Money for, and he wanted to have me go and make
an Errand to buy a Neck to that Turn-over that he showed, and if they would not
take my Money for the Neckcloths to bid a Shilling more, and haggle with them;
and then he made more Errands, and so continued to have such petty Business to
do, that I should be sure to stay a good while.
    When he had given me my Errands, he told them a long Story of a Visit he was
going to make to a Family they all knew, and where was to be such and such
Gentlemen, and very formally ask'd his Sisters to go with him, and they as
formally excuse'd themselves, because of Company that they had Notice was to come
and Visit them that Afternoon, all which by the way he had contrive'd on purpose.
    He had scarce done speaking, but his Man came up to tell him that Sir W- H-'
s Coach stop'd at the Door; so he runs down, and comes up again immediately,
Alas! says he aloud, There's all my Mirth spoil'd at once; Sir W- has sent his
Coach for me, and desires to speak with me. It seems this Sir W- was a Gentleman
who liv'd about three Miles off, to whom he had spoke on purpose to lend him his
Charriot for a Particular Occasion, and had appointed it to call for him, as it
did, about three a Clock.
    Immediately he calls for his best Wig, Hat, and Sword, and ordering his Man
to go to the other Place to make his Excuse, that was to say, he made an Excuse
to send his Man away, he prepares to go into the Coach: As he was going, he
stop'd a while, and speaks mightily earnestly to me about his Business, and
finds an Opportunity to say very softly, Come away my dear as soon as ever you
can. I said nothing, but made a Court'sy, as if I had done so to what he said in
Publick; in about a Quarter of an Hour I went out too; I had no Dress, other
than before, except that I had a Hood, a Mask, a Fan, and a pair of Gloves in my
Pocket; so that there was not the least Suspicion in the House: He waited for me
in a back Lane, which he knew I must pass by, and the Coachman knew whither to
go, which was to a certain Place, called Mile-End, where liv'd a Confident of
his, where we went in, and where was all the Convenience in the World to be as
wicked as we pleas'd.
    When we were together, he began to Talk very gravely to me, and to tell me,
he did not bring me there to betray me; that his Passion for me, would not
suffer him to abuse me; that he resolved to marry me as soon as he came to his
Estate; that in the mean time, if I would grant his Request, he would maintain
me very Honourably, and made me a thousand Protestations of his Sincerity, and
of his Affection to me; and that he would never abandon me, and, as I may say,
made a thousand more Preambles than he need to have done.
    However, as he press'd me to speak, I told him I had no Reason to question
the Sincerity of his Love to me, after so many Protestations, But - and there I
stop'd, as if I left him to guess the rest; But what, my Dear, says he, I guess
what you mean, what if you should be with Child, is not that it? Why then, says
he, I'll take care of you, and provide for you, and the Child too, and that you
may see I am not in Jest, says he, here's an Earnest for you, and with that he
pulls out a Silk Purse with an Hundred Guineas in it, and gave it me; and I'll
give you such another, says he, every Year till I marry you.
    My Colour came and went at the Sight of the Purse, and with the fire of his
Proposal together, so that I could not say a Word, and he easily perceive'd it;
so putting the Purse into my Bosom, I made no more Resistance to him, but let
him do just what he pleas'd, and as often as he pleas'd; and thus I finish'd my
own Destruction at once, for from this Day, being forsaken of my Virtue, and my
Modesty, I had nothing of Value left to recommend me, either to God's Blessing,
or Man's Assistance.
    But things did not end here, I went back to the Town, did the Business he
directed me to, and was at Home before any Body thought me long; as for my
Gentleman, he stay'd out till late at Night, and there was not the least
Suspicion in the Family, either on his Account or on mine.
    We had after this, frequent Opportunities to repeat our Crime, and
especially at Home when his Mother and the young Ladies went abroad a Visiting,
which he watch'd so narrowly, as never to miss; knowing always before-hand when
they went out, and then fail'd not to catch me all alone, and securely enough;
so that we took our fill of our wicked Pleasures for near half a Year; and yet,
which was the most to my Satisfaction, I was not with Child.
    But before this half Year was expir'd, his younger Brother, of whom I have
made some mention in the beginning of the Story, falls to work with me; and he
finding me alone in the Garden one Evening, begins a Story of the same Kind to
me, made good honest Professions of being in Love with me; and in short,
proposes Fairly and Honourably to marry me.
    I was now confounded, and driven to such an Extremity, as the like was never
known to me; I resisted the Proposal with Obstinacy, and began to arm my self
with Arguments: I laid before him the Inequality of the Match, the Treatment I
should meet with in the Family, the Ingratitude it would be to his good Father
and Mother, who had taken me into their House upon such generous Principles, and
when I was in such a low Condition; and in short, I said everything to disswade
him that I could imagine except telling him the Truth, which wou'd indeed have
put an End to it all, but that I durst not think of mentioning.
    But here happened a Circumstance that I did not expect indeed, which put me
to my Shifts; for this young Gentleman, as he was plain and honest, so he
pretended to nothing but what was so too; and knowing his own Innocence, he was
not so careful to make his having a Kindness for Mrs. Betty a Secret in the
House, as his Brother was; and tho' he did not let them know that he had talk'd
to me about it, yet he said enough to let his Sisters perceive he love'd me, and
his Mother saw it too, which tho' they took no Notice of to me, yet they did to
him, and immediately I found their Carriage to me alter'd more than ever before.
    I saw the Cloud, though I did not foresee the Storm; it was easy, I say, to
see their Carriage was alter'd, and that it grew worse and worse every Day,
'till at last I got Information that I should in a very little while be desired
to remove.
    I was not alarm'd at the News, having a full Satisfaction that I should be
provided for; and especially considering that I had Reason every Day to expect I
should be with Child, and that then I should be obliged to remove without any
Pretences for it.
    After some time, the younger Gentleman took an Opportunity to tell me, that
the Kindness he had for me had got Vent in the Family; he did not charge me with
it, he said, for he knew well enough which way it came out; he told me his way
of Talking had been the Occasion of it, for that he did not make his Respect for
me so much a Secret as he might have done, and the Reason was, that he was at a
Point, that if I would consent to have him, he would tell them all openly that
he love'd me, and that he intended to marry me: That it was true, his Father and
Mother might resent it, and be unkind, but he was now in a Way to live, being
bred to the Law, and he did not fear Maintaining me, and that in short, as he
believe'd I would not be asham'd of him, so he was resolve'd not to be ashamed of
me, and that he scorn'd to be afraid to own me now, who he resolve'd to own after
I was his Wife, and therefore I had nothing to do but to give him my Hand, and
he would answer for all the rest.
    I was now in a dreadful Condition indeed, and now I repented heartily my
Easiness with the eldest Brother, not from any Reflection of Conscience, for I
was a stranger to those things, but I could not think of being a Whore to one
Brother, and a Wife to the other; it came also into my Thoughts, that the first
Brother had promise'd to make me his Wife when he came to his Estate; but I
presently remember'd, what I had often thought of, that he had never spoken a
Word of having me for a Wife, after he had Conquer'd me for a Mistress; and
indeed till now, tho' I said I thought of it often, yet it gave no Disturbance
at all, for as he did not seem in the least to lessen his Affection to me, so
neither did he lessen his Bounty, tho' he had the Discretion himself to desire
me not to lay out a Penny in clothes, or to make the least show extraordinary,
because it would necessarily give Jealousy in the Family, since every Body knew
I could come at such things no manner of ordinary Way, but by some private
Friendship, which they would presently have suspected.
    I was now in a great strait, and knew not what to do; the main Difficulty
was this, the younger Brother not only laid close Siege to me, but suffered it
to be seen; he would come into his Sister's Room, and his Mother's Room, and sit
down, and talk a Thousand kind Things to me, even before their Faces; so that
the whole House talk'd of it, and his Mother reprov'd him for it, and their
Carriage to me appeared quite altered: In short, his Mother had let fall some
Speeches, as if she intended to put me out of the Family, that is in English, to
turn me out of Doors. Now, I was sure this could not be a Secret to his Brother,
only that he might think, as indeed no Body else yet did, that the youngest
Brother had made any Proposal to me about it; but as I easily could see that it
would go farther, so I saw likewise there was an absolute Necessity to speak of
it to him, or that he would speak of it to me, but knew not whether I should
break it to him, or let it alone till he should break it to me.
    Upon serious Consideration, for indeed now I began to consider things very
seriously, and never till now, I resolve'd to tell him of it first, and it was
not long before I had an Opportunity, for the very next Day his Brother went to
London upon some Business, and the Family being out a Visiting, just as it
happened before, and as indeed was often the Case, he came according to his
Custom to spend an Hour or Two with Mrs. Betty.
    When he had sate down a while, he easily perceived there was an Alteration
in my Countenance, that I was not so free and pleasant with him as I used to be,
and particularly, that I had been a Crying; he was not long before he took
Notice of it, and ask'd me in very kind Terms what was the Matter, and if
anything troubled me: I would have put it off if I could, but it was not to be
conceal'd; so after suffering many Importunities to draw that out of me, which I
long'd as much as possible to disclose, I told him that it was true, something
did trouble me, and something of such a Nature, that I could hardly conceal from
him, and yet that I could not tell how to tell him of it neither; that it was a
thing that not only Surprise'd me, but greatly perplext me, and that I knew not
what Course to take, unless he would direct me: He told me with great
Tenderness, that let it be what it would, I should not let it trouble me, for he
would protect me from all the World.
    I then began at a Distance, and told him I was afraid the Ladies had got
some secret Information of our Correspondence; for that it was easy to see that
their Conduct was very much chang'd towards me, and that now it was come to
pass, that they frequently found Fault with me, and sometimes fell quite out
with me, tho' I never gave them the least Occasion: That whereas, I us'd always
to lye with the Eldest Sister, I was lately put to lye by my self, or with one
of the Maids; and that I had over-heard them several times talking very unkindly
about me; but that which confirm'd it all was, that one of the Servants had told
me that she had heard I was to be turn'd out, and that it was not safe for the
Family that I should be any longer in the House.
    He smile'd when he heard of this, and I ask'd him how he could make so light
of it, when he must need know, that if there was any Discovery, I was undone,
and that it would hurt him, tho' not Ruin him, as it would me: I upbraided him,
that he was like the rest of his Sex, that when they had the Character of a
Woman at their Mercy, oftentimes made it their Jest, and at least look'd upon it
as a Trifle, and counted the Ruin of those they had had their Will of, as a
thing of no Value.
    He saw me warm and serious, and he chang'd his Stile immediately; he told me
, he was sorry I should have such a thought of him: that he had never given me
the least Occasion for it, but had been as tender of my Reputation, as he could
be of his own; that he was sure our Correspondence had been managed with so much
Address, that not one Creature in the Family had so much as a Suspicion of it;
that if he smile'd when I told him my Thoughts, it was at the Assurance he lately
receive'd, that our understanding one another, was not so much as guess'd at, and
that when he had told me, how much Reason he had to be Easy, I should smile as
he did, for he was very certain, it would give me a full Satisfaction.
    This is a Mistery I cannot understand, says I, or how it should be to my
Satisfaction, that I am to be turn'd out of Doors; for if our Correspondence is
not discover'd, I know not what else I have done to change the Faces of the
whole Family to me, who formerly used me with so much Tenderness, as if I had
been one of their own Children.
    Why look you, Child, says he; That they are uneasy about you, that is true,
but that they have the least Suspicion of the Case as it is, and as it respects
you and I, is so far from being true, that they suspect my Brother Robin, and,
in short, they are fully persuaded be makes Love to you: Nay, the Fool has put
it into their Heads too himself, for he is continually Bantring them about it,
and making a Jest of himself; I confess I think he is wrong to do so, because he
cannot but see it Vexes them, and makes them unkind to you; but it is a
Satisfaction to me, because of the Assurance it gives me, that they do not
suspect me in the least, and I hope this will be to your Satisfaction too.
    So it is, says I, one way, but this does not reach my Case at all, nor is
this the chief Thing that troubles me, tho' I have been concern'd about that
too: What is it then, says he? With which, I fell into Tears, and could say
nothing to him at all: He strove to pacifie me all he could, but began at last
to be very pressing upon me, to tell what it was; at last I answer'd, that I
thought I ought to tell him too, and that he had some right to know it, besides,
that I wanted his Direction in the Case, for I was in such Perplexity, that I
knew not what Course to take, and then I related the whole Affair to him: I told
him, how imprudently his Brother had manage'd himself, in making himself so
Publick; for that if he had kept it a Secret, I could but have denied him
Positively, without giving any Reason for it, and he would in Time have ceased
his Sollicitations; but that he had the Vanity, first, to depend upon it that I
would not deny him, and then had taken the Freedom to tell his Design to the
whole House.
    I told him, how far I had resisted him, and how sincere and honourable his
Offers were; but says I, my Case will be doubly hard; for as they carry it I'll
to me now, because he desires to have me, they'll carry it worse when they shall
find I have deny'd him; and they will presently say, there's something else in
it, and that I am marry'd already to somebody else, or that I would never refuse
a Match so much above me as this was.
    This Discourse Surprise'd him indeed very much: He told me, that it was a
critical Point indeed for me to manage, and he did not see which way I should
get out of it; but he would consider of it, and let me know next time we met,
what Resolution he was come to about it; and in the mean time, desire'd I would
not give my Consent to his Brother, nor yet give him a flat Denial, but that I
would hold him in Suspence a while.
    I seem'd to start at his saying, I should not give him my Consent; I told
him, he knew very well, I had no Consent to give; that he had ingag'd himself to
marry me, and that I was thereby ingag'd to him; that he had all along told me,
I was his Wife, and I look'd upon my self as effectually so, as if the Ceremony
had pass'd; and that it was from his own Mouth that I did so, he having all
along persuaded me to call my self his Wife.
    Well, my Dear, says he, don't be concern'd at that now; if I am not your
Husband, I'll be as good as a Husband to you, and do not let those things
trouble you now, but let me look a little farther into this Affair, and I shall
be able to say more next time we meet.
    He pacify'd me as well as he could with this, but I found he was very
Thoughtful, and that tho' he was very kind to me, and kiss'd me a thousand
Times, and more I believe, and gave me Money too, yet he offer'd no more all the
while we were together, which was above two Hours, and which I much wonder'd at,
considering how it us'd to be, and what Opportunity we had.
    His Brother did not come from London, for five or six Days, and it was two
Days more, before he got an Opportunity to talk with him; but then getting him
by himself, he talk'd very close to him about it; and the same Evening found
Means (for we had a long Conference together) to repeat all their Discourse to
me, which as near as I can remember, was to the purpose following. He told him
he heard strange News of him since he went, (viz.) that he made Love to Mrs.
Betty: Well, says his Brother, a little angrily, And what then? What has any
body to do with that? Nay says his Brother, don't be angry Robin, I don't
pretend to have any thing to do with it; but I find they do concern themselves
about it, and that they have used the poor Girl Ill about it, which I should
take as done to my self; Who do you mean by THEY? says Robin. I mean my Mother,
and the Girls, says the elder Brother.
    But hark ye, says his Brother, are you in Earnest, do you really Love the
Girl? Why then, says Robin, I will be free with you, I do love her above all the
Women in the World, and I will have her, let them say and do what they will, I
believe the Girl will not deny me.
    It stuck me to the Heart when he told me this, for tho' it was most rational
to think I would not deny him, yet I knew in my own Conscience, I must, and I
saw my Ruin in my being oblige'd to do so; but I knew it was my business to Talk
otherwise then, so I interrupted him in his Story thus: Ay! said I, does he
think I cannot deny him? but he shall find I can deny him for all that. Well my
dear, says he, but let me give you the whole Story as it went on between us, and
then say what you will.
    Then he went on and told me, that he reply'd thus: But Brother, you know She
has nothing, and you may have several Ladies with good Fortunes: 'Tis no matter
for that, said Robin, I Love the Girl; and I will never please my Pocket in
Marrying, and not please my Fancy; And so my Dear, adds he, there is no opposing
him.
    Yes, yes, says I, I can oppose him, I have learnt to say NO now, tho' I had
not learnt it before; if the best Lord in the Land offer'd me Marriage now, I
could very cheerfully say NO to him.
    Well, but my Dear, says he, What can you say to him? You know, as you said
before, he will ask you many Questions about it, and all the House will wonder
what the meaning of it should be.
    Why says I, smiling, I can stop all their Mouths at one Clap, by telling him
and them too, that I am Married already to his elder Brother.
    He smile'd a little too at the Word, but I could see it Startled him, and he
could not hide the disorder it put him into: however, he return'd, Why tho' that
may be true, in some Sense, yet I suppose you are but in Jest, when you talk of
giving such an Answer as that, it may not be convenient on many Accounts.
    No, no, says I pleasantly, I am not so fond of letting that Secret come out,
without your Consent.
    But what then can you say to them, says he, when they find you possitive
against a Match, which would be apparently so much to your Advantage? Why says I
, should I be at a loss? First, I am not oblige'd to give them any Reason: on the
other hand, I may tell them, I am married already, and stop there, and that will
be a full Stop too to him, for he can have no Reason to ask one Question after
it.
    Ay, says he, but the whole House will teize you about that, and if you deny
them possitively, they will be disoblig'd at you, and Suspicious besides.
    Why, says I, What can I do? What would you have me do? I was in strait
enough before, as I told you, and acquainted you with the Circumstances, that I
might have your Advice.
    My dear, says he, I have been considering very much upon it, you may be
sure, and tho' the Advice has many Mortifications in it to me, and may at first
seem Strange to you, yet all Things consider'd, I see no better way for you,
than to let him go on; and if you find him hearty and in Earnest, Marry him.
    I gave him a look full of Horror at those Words, and turning Pale as Death,
was at the very point of sinking down out of the Chair I sat in: When giving a
start, my Dear, says he aloud, What's the matter with you? Where are you agoing?
and a great many such Things; and with jogging and calling to me, fetch'd me a
little to my self, tho' it was a good while before I fully recover'd my Senses,
and was not able to speak for several Minutes.
    When I was fully recover'd, he began again; My dear, says he, I would have
you consider seriously of it: you may see plainly how the Family stand in this
Case, and they would be stark Mad if it was my Case, as it is my Brother's, and
for ought I see, it would be my Ruin and yours too.
    Ay! says I, still speaking angrily; Are all your Protestations and Vows to
be shaken by the dislike of the Family? Did I not always object that to you, and
you made a light thing of it, as what you were above, and would not Value; and
is it come to this now? Is this your Faith and Honour, your Love, and the
Solidity of your Promises?
    He continued perfectly Calm, notwithstanding all my Reproaches, and I was
not sparing of them at all; but he reply'd at last, My Dear, I have not broken
one Promise with you yet; I did tell you I would Marry you when I was come to my
Estate; but you see my Father is a hail, healthy Man, and may live these thirty
Years still, and not be Older than several are round us in the Town; and you
never propos'd my Marrying you sooner, because you know it might be my Ruin; and
as to the rest, I have not fail'd you in any thing.
    I could not deny a Word of this, but why then, says I, can you perswade me
to such a horrid step, as leaving you, since you have not left me? Will you
allow no Affection, no Love on my Side, where there has been so much on your
Side? Have I made you no Returns? Have I given no Testimony of my Sincerity, and
of my Passion? Are the Sacrifices I have made of Honour and Modesty to you, no
Proof of my being ty'd to you in Bonds too strong to be broken?
    But here my Dear, says he, you may come into a safe Station, and appear with
Honour, and the Remembrance of what we have done, may be wrapt up in an eternal
Silence, as if it had never happen'd; you shall always have my sincere
Affection, only then it shall be Honest, and perfectly Just to my Brother; you
shall be my Dear Sister, as now you are my Dear - and there he stop'd.
    Your dear Whore, says I, you would have said, and you might as well have
said it; but I understand you: However, I desire you to remember the long
Discourses you have had with me, and the many Hours' pains you have taken to
perswade me to believe my self an honest Woman; that I was your Wife
intentionally, and that it was as effectual a Marriage that had pass'd between
us, as if we had been publicly Wedded by the Parson of the Parish; you know
these have been your own Words to me.
    I found this was a little too close upon him, but I made it up in what
follows; he stood stock still for a while, and said nothing, and I went on thus;
you cannot, says I, without the highest injustice believe that I yielded upon
all these Perswasions without a Love not to be questioned, not to be shaken
again by any thing that could happen afterwards: If you have such dishonourable
Thoughts of me, I must ask you what Foundation have I given for such a
Suggestion.
    If then I have yielded to the Importunities of my Affection; and if I have
been persuaded to believe that I am really your Wife, shall I now give the Lye
to all those Arguments, and call my self your Whore, or Mistress, which is the
same thing? And will you Transfer me to your Brother? Can you transfer my
Affection? Can you bid me cease loving you, and bid me love him? Is it in my
Power think you, to make such a Change at Demand? No Sir, said I, depend upon it
'tis imposible, and whatever the Change on your Side may be, I will ever be
true; and I had much rather, since it is come that unhappy Length, be your Whore
than your Brother's Wife.
    He appear'd pleas'd, and touch'd with the impression of this last Discourse,
and told me that he stood where he did before; that he had not been Unfaithful
to me in any one Promise he had ever made yet, but that there were so many
terrible things presented themselves to his View in the Affair before me, that
he had thought of the other as a Remedy, only that he thought this would not be
an entire parting us, but we might love as Friends all our Days, and perhaps
with more Satisfaction than we should in the Station we were now in: That he
durst say, I could not apprehend any thing from him, as to betraying a Secret,
which could not but be the Destruction of us both if it came out: That he had
but one Question to ask of me, that could lye in the way of it, and if that
Question was answer'd, he could not but think still it was the only Step I could
take.
    I guess'd at his Question presently, viz. Whether I was not with Child? As
to that, I told him, he need not be concern'd about it, for I was not with
Child; why then my Dear, says he, we have no time to Talk farther now; Consider
of it, I cannot but be of the Opinion still, that it will be the best Course you
can take; and with this, he took his Leave, and the more hastily too, his Mother
and Sisters Ringing at the Gate, just at the Moment he had risen up to go.
    He left me in the utmost Confusion of Thought; and he easily perceive'd it
the next Day, and all the rest of the Week, but he had no Opportunity to come at
me all that Week, till the Sunday after, when I being indispos'd did not go to
Church, and he making some Excuse stay'd at Home.
    And now he had me an Hour and Half again by my self, and we fell into the
same Arguments all over again; at last, I ask'd him warmly, what Opinion he must
have of my Modesty, that he could suppose, I should so much as entertain a
thought of lying with two Brothers? And assure'd him it could never be: I added,
if he was to tell me that he would never see me more, than which nothing but
Death could be more Terrible, yet I could never entertain a Thought so
Dishonourable to my self, and so Base to him; and therefore, I entreated him, if
he had one Grain of Respect or Affection left for me, that he would speak no
more of it to me, or that he would pull his Sword out and Kill me. He appear'd
Surprise'd at my Obstinacy, as he call'd it, told me I was unkind to my self, and
unkind to him in it; that it was a Crisis unlook'd for upon us both, but that he
did not see any other way to save us both from Ruin, and therefore he thought it
the more Unkind; but that if he must say no more of it to me, he added with an
unusual Coldness, that he did not know any thing else we had to talk of; and so
he rose up to take his leave; I rose up too, as if with the same indifference,
but when he came to give me as it were a parting Kiss, I burst out into such a
Passion of Crying, that tho' I would have spoke, I could not, and only pressing
his Hand, seem'd to give him the Adieu, but cry'd vehemently.
    He was sensibly mov'd with this; so he sat down again, and said a great many
kind things to me, but still urg'd the necessity of what he had proposed; all
the while insisting, that if I did refuse, he would notwithstanding provide for
me; but letting me plainly see, that he would decline me in the main Point; nay,
even as a Mistress; making it a point of Honour not to lye with the Woman, that
for ought he knew, might one time or other come to be his Brother's Wife.
    The bare loss of him as a Gallant was not so much my Affliction, as the loss
of his Person, whom indeed I love'd to Distraction; and the loss of all the
Expectations I had, and which I always built my Hopes upon, of having him one
Day for my Husband: These things oppress'd my Mind so much, that in short, the
agonies of my Mind, threw me into a high Fever, and long it was, that none in
the Family expected my Life.
    I was reduce'd very low indeed, and was often Delirious; but nothing lay so
near me, as the fear, that when I was light Headed, I should say something or
other to his Prejudice, I was distress'd in my Mind also to see him, and so he
was to see me, for he really love'd me most passionately; but it could not be;
there was not the least Room to desire it on one side, or other.
    It was near five Weeks that I kept my Bed, and tho' the violence of my Fever
abated in three Weeks, yet it several times return'd; and the Physicians said
two or three times they could do no more for me, but that they must leave Nature
and the Distemper to fight it out: After the end of five Weeks I grew better,
but was so weak, so alter'd, and recover'd so slowly, that the Physicians
apprehended I should go into a Consumption; and which vex'd me most, they gave
their Opinion, that my Mind was oppress'd, that something troubl'd me, and, in
short, that I was IN LOVE; upon this, the whole House set upon me to press me to
tell, whether I was in Love or not, and with who[m]? but as I well might, I
deny'd my being in Love at all.
    They had on this Occasion a Squabble one Day about me at Table, that had
like to put the whole Family in an Uproar, they happen'd to be all at Table, but
the Father; as for me I was Ill, and in my Chamber; At the beginning of the
Talk, the old Gentlewoman who had sent me somewhat to Eat, bid her Maid go up,
and ask me if I would have any more; but the Maid brought down Word, I had not
Eaten half what she had sent me already. Alas, says the old Lady, that poor
Girl; I am afraid she will never be well. Well! says the elder Brother, How
should Mrs. Betty be well, they say she is in Love? I believe nothing of it,
says the old Gentlewoman, I don't know, says the eldest Sister, what to say to
it, they have made such a rout about her being so Handsome, and so Charming, and
I know not what, and that in her hearing too, that has turn 'd the Creature's
Head I believe, and who knows what possessions may follow such doings? for my
Part I don't know what to make of it.
    Why Sister, you must acknowledge she is very Handsome, says the elder
Brother. Ay, and a great deal Handsomer than you Sister, says Robin, and that's
your Mortification. Well, well, that is not the Question, says his Sister, the
Girl is well enough, and she knows it, she need not be told of it to make her
Vain.
    We don't talk of her being Vain, says the elder Brother, but of her being in
Love; may be she is in Love with herself, it seems my Sisters think so.
    I would she was in Love with me, says Robin, I'd quickly put her out of her
Pain. What d'ye mean by that Son? says the old Lady, how can you talk so? Why
Madam, says Robin again, very honestly, do you think I'd let the poor Girl die
for Love, and of me too, that is so near at hand to be had. Fye Brother, says
the second Sister, how can you talk so? Would you take a Creature that has not a
Groat in the World? Prithee Child, says Robin, Beauty's a Portion, and good
Humour with it, is a double Portion; I wish thou hadst half her Stock of both
for thy Portion: So there was her Mouth stop'd.
    I find, says the eldest Sister, if Betty is not in Love, my Brother is; I
wonder he has not broke his Mind to Betty, I warrant she won't say NO. They that
yield when they are ask'd, says Robin, are one step before them that were never
ask'd to yield, and two Steps before them that yield before they are ask'd; And
that's an Answer to you Sister.
    This fir'd the Sister, and she flew into a Passion, and said, things were
come to that pass, that it was time the Wench, meaning me, was out of the
Family; and but that she was not fit to be turn'd out, she hop'd her Father and
Mother would consider of it, as soon as she could be remove'd.
    Robin reply'd, That was for the Master and Mistress of the Family, who were
not to be taught by One, that had so little judgement as his eldest Sister.
    It run up a great deal farther; the Sister Scolded, Robin Rally'd and
Banter'd, but poor Betty lost ground by it extremely in the Family: I heard of
it, and cry'd heartily, and the old Lady came up to me, some body having told
her that I was so much concern'd about it; I complain'd to her, that it was very
hard the Doctors should pass such a Censure upon me, for which they had no
Ground; and that it was still harder, considering the Circumstances I was under
in the Family; that I hop'd I had done nothing to lessen her Esteem for me, or
given any occasion for the Bickering between her Sons and Daughters; and I had
more need to think of a Coffin, than of being in Love, and beg'd she would not
let me suffer in her Opinion for anybody's Mistakes, but my own.
    She was sensible of the Justice of what I said, but told me, since there had
been such a Clamour among them, and that her younger Son talk'd after such a
rattling way as he did; she desire'd I would be so Faithful to her, as to Answer
her but one Question sincerely; I told her I would, and with the utmost
Plainness and Sincerity: Why then the Question was, Whether there was any thing
between her son Robert and me? I told her with all the Protestations of
Sincerity that I was able to make, and as I might well do, that there was not,
nor ever had been; I told her, that Mr. Robert had rattled and jested, as she
knew it was his way, and that I took it always as I suppose'd he meant it, to be
a wild airy way of Discourse that had no Signification in it; And assured her,
that there was not the least tittle of what she understood by it between us; and
that those who had Suggested it, had done me a great deal of Wrong, and Mr.
Robert no Service at all.
    The old Lady was fully satisfy'd, and kiss'd me, spoke cheerfully to me, and
bid me take care of my Health, and want for nothing, and so took her leave: But
when she came down, she found the Brother and all his Sisters together by the
Ears; they were angry even to Passion, at his upbraiding them with their being
Homely, and having never had any Sweet hearts, never having been ask'd the
Question, their being so forward as almost to ask first, and the like: He
rallied them with Mrs. Betty; how Pretty, how good Humour'd, how she Sung better
than they did, and Danc'd better, and how much Handsomer she was; and in doing
this, he omitted no Ill-natur'd Thing that could vex them. The old Lady came
down in the height of it, and to stop it, told them the Discourse she had had
with me, and how I answer'd, that there was nothing between Mr. Robert and I.
    She's wrong there, says Robin, for if there was not a great deal between us,
we should be closer together than we are: I told her I Love'd her hugely, says
he, but I could never make the Jade believe I was in Earnest; I do not know how
you should, says his Mother, no body in their Senses could believe you were in
Earnest, to Talk so to a poor Girl, whose Circumstances you know so well.
    But Prithee Son adds she, since you tell us you could not make her believe
you were in Earnest, what must we believe about it? for you ramble so in your
Discourse, that no body knows whether you are in Earnest or in Jest; But as I
find the Girl by your own Confession has answer'd truly, I wish you would do so
too, and tell me seriously, so that I may depend upon it; Is there any thing in
it or no? Are you in Earnest or no? Are you Distracted indeed, or are you not?
'Tis a weighty Question, I wish you would make us easy about it.
    By my Faith Madam says Robin, 'tis in vain to mince the Matter, or tell any
more Lyes about it, I am in Earnest, as much as a Man is, that's going to be
Hang'd. If Mrs. Betty would say she Lov'd me, and that she would Marry me, I'd
have her to-morrow Morning fasting; and say, To have, and to hold, instead of
eating my Breakfast.
    Well, says the Mother, Then there's one Son lost; and she said it in a very
mournful Tone, as one greatly concern'd at it. I hope not Madam, says Robin, no
Man is lost, when a good Wife has found him. Why but Child, says the old Lady,
she is a Beggar. Why then Madam, she has the more need of Charity says Robin;
I'll take her off the hands of the Parish, and she and I'll Beg together. It's
bad Jesting with such things, says the Mother. I don't Jest Madam, says Robin:
We'll come and beg your Pardon, Madam; and your Blessing, Madam, and my
Father's. This is all out of the way Son, says the Mothe, if you are in Earnest
you are Undone. I am afraid not, says he, for I am really afraid she won't have
me, after all my Sister's huffing, I believe I shall never be able to persuade
her to it.
    That's a fine Tale indeed, she is not so far gone neither, Mrs. Betty is no
Fool, says the youngest Sister, do you think she has learn'd to say NO, any more
than other People? No, Mrs. Mirth-Wit, says Robin, Mrs. Betty's no Fool, but
Mrs. Betty may be engaged some other way, And what then? Nay, says the eldest
sister, we can say nothing to that, Who must it be to then? She is never out of
the Doors, it must be between you. I have nothing to say to that, says Robin, I
have been examined enough, there's my Brother, if it must be between us, go to
work with him.
    This stung the elder Brother to the Quick, and he concluded that Robin had
discover'd something; However, he kept himself from appearing disturb'd;
Prithee, says he, Don't go to sham your Stories off upon me, I tell you, I deal
in no such Ware, I have nothing to say to no Mrs. Betty's in the Parish; and
with that he rose up, and brush 'd off. No, says the eldest Sister, I dare
answer for my Brother, he knows the World better.
    Thus the Discourse ended; but it left the eldest Brother quite confounded:
He concluded his Brother had made a full Discovery, and he began to doubt,
whether I had been concern'd in it, or not; but with all his Management, he
could not bring it about to get at me; at last he was so perplex'd, that he was
quite Desperate, and resolve'd he would see me whatever came of it: In order to
this, he contrive'd it so, that one Day after Dinner, watching his eldest Sister,
till he could see her go up Stairs, he runs after her, Hark ye Sister, says he,
Where is this sick Woman? may not a Body see her? Yes, says the Sister, I
believe you may, but let me go in first a little, and I'll tell you; so she run
up to the Door, and gave me Notice, and presently call'd to him again: Brother,
says she, you may come in if you please; so in he came, just in the same kind of
Rant: Well, says he, at the Door, as he came in, Where's this sick Body that's
in Love? How do ye do Mrs. Betty? I would have got up out of my Chair, but was
so weak I could not for a good while; and he saw it, and his Sister too, and she
said, Come do not strive to stand up, my Brother desires no Ceremony,
especially, now you are so Weak. No, no, Mrs. Betty, Pray sit still, says he,
and so sits himself down in a Chair over against me, and appear'd as if he was
mighty Merry.
    He talk'd a deal of rambling Stuff to his Sister, and to me, sometimes of
one thing, sometimes another, on purpose to amuse her, and every now and then
would turn it upon the old Story: Poor Mrs. Betty, says he, It is a sad thing to
be in Love, why it has reduced you sadly; at last I spoke a little, I am glad to
see you so merry, Sir, says I, but I think the Doctor might have found something
better to do, than to make his Game of his Patients: If I had been Ill of no
other Distemper, I know the Proverb too well to have let him come to me: What
Proverb? says he:
    What,
 
»Where Love is the Case,
The Doctor's an Ass.«
 
Is that not it Mrs. Betty! I smile'd, and said nothing: Nay, says he, I think the
Effect has prov'd it to be Love; for it seems the Doctor has done you little
Service, you mend very slowly, they say, I doubt there's somewhat in it, Mrs.
Betty, I doubt you are sick of the Incurables. I smile'd and said, No, indeed Sir
, that's none of my Distemper.
    We had a deal of such Discourse, and sometimes others that signified as
little; by and by he ask'd me to sing them a Song; at which I smile'd, and said,
my singing Days were over: At last he ask'd me, if he should Play upon his Flute
to me; his Sister said she believe'd my Head could not bear it; I bow'd and said,
Pray Madam do not hinder it, I love the Flute very much; then his Sister said,
well do then Brother; with that he pull'd out the Key of his Closet; Dear
Sister, says he, I am very Lazy, do step and fetch my Flute, it lies in such a
Drawer, naming a Place where he was sure it was not, that she might be a little
while a looking for it.
    As soon as she was gone, he related the whole Story to me of the Discourse
his Brother had about me, and his concern about it, which was the Reason of his
contriving this Visit. I assured him, I had never opened my Mouth, either to his
Brother, or to any Body else: I told him the dreadful Exigence I was in; that my
Love to him, and his offering to have me forget that Affection, and remove it to
another, had thrown me down; and that I had a Thousand times wish'd I might Dye,
rather than Recover, and to have the same Circumstances to struggle with as I
had before: I added, that I foresaw, that as soon as I was well, I must quit the
Family, and that as for marrying his Brother, I abhor'd the thoughts of it,
after what had been my Case with him, and that he might depend upon it, I would
never see his Brother again upon that Subject: That if he would break all his
Vows and Oaths, and Engagements with me, be that between his Conscience and
himself: But he should never be able to say, that I who he had persuaded to call
my self his Wife, and who had given him the Liberty to use me as a Wife, was not
as Faithful to him as a Wife ought to be, whatever he might be to me.
    He was going to reply, and had said, That he was sorry I could not be
persuaded, and was a going to say more, but he heard his Sister a coming, and so
did I; and yet I forced out these few Words as a reply, That I could never be
persuaded to Love one Brother and Marry the other: He shook his Head, and said,
Then I am ruin'd, meaning himself; and that Moment his Sister enter'd the Room,
and told him she could not find the Flute: Well says he merrily, This Laziness
won't do, so he gets up and goes himself to look for it, but comes back without
it too, not but that he could have found it, but he had no mind to Play; and,
besides, the Errand he sent his Sister on was answer'd another way; for he only
wanted to speak to me, which he had done, tho' not much to his Satisfaction.
    I had however a great deal of Satisfaction in having spoken my Mind to him
in Freedom, and with such an honest Plainness, as I have related; and tho' it
did not at all work the way I desired, that is to say, to oblige the Person to
me the more; yet it took from him all Possibility of quitting me, but by a down
right breach of Honour, and giving up all the Faith of a Gentleman which he had
so often engaged by, never to abandon me, but to make me his Wife as soon as he
came to his Estate.
    It was not many Weeks after this, before I was about the House again, and
began to grow well; but I continued Melancholly and Retir'd, which amaz'd the
whole Family, except he that knew the Reason of it; yet it was a great while
before he took any Notice of it, and I, as backward to speak as he, carried as
respectfully to him, but never offer'd to speak a Word that was Particular of
any kind whatsoever; and this continued for Sixteen or Seventeen Weeks; so that
as I expected every Day to be dismiss'd the Family, on Account of what Distaste
they had taken another way, in which I had no Guilt, I expected to hear no more
of this Gentleman, after all his solemn Vows, but to be ruin'd and abandon'd.
    At last I broke the way my self in the Family, for my Removing; for being
talking seriously with the old Lady one Day, about my own Circumstances, and how
my Distemper had left a Heaviness upon my Spirits; The old Lady said, I am
afraid Betty, what I have said to you about my Son, has had some Influence upon
you, and that you are Melancholly on his Account; Pray will you let me know how
the Matter stands with you both? If it may not be improper, for as for Robin, he
does nothing but Rally and Banter when I speak of it to him; Why truly madam,
said I, that Matter stands as I wish it did not, and I shall be very Sincere
with you in it, whatever befalls me. Mr. Robert has several times propos'd
Marriage to me, which is what I had no Reason to expect, my poor Circumstances
consider'd; but I have always resisted him, and that perhaps in Terms more
possitive than became me, considering the Regard that I ought to have for every
Branch of your Family: But, said I, Madam, I could never so far forget my
Obligations to you, and all your House, to offer to Consent to a Thing which I
knew must needs be Disobliging to you, and have possitively told him that I
would never entertain a Thought of that kind, unless I had your Consent, and his
Father's also, to whom I was bound by so many invincible Obligations.
    And is this possible, Mrs. Betty, says the Old Lady? Then you have been much
Juster to us than we have been to you; for we have all look'd upon you as a kind
of a Snare to my Son; and I had a Proposal to make you, for your Removing for
fear of it; but I had not yet mention'd it to you, because I was afraid of
grieving you too much, least it should throw you down again, for we have a
Respect for you still, tho' not so much as to have it be the Ruin of my Son; but
if it be as you say, we have all wrong'd you very much.
    As to the Truth of what I say, Madam, said I, I refer to your Son himself,
if he will do me any Justice, he must tell you the Story just as I have told it.
    Away goes the Old Lady to her Daughters, and tells them the whole Story,
just as I had told it her, and they were surpris'd at it, you may be sure, as I
believe'd they would be; one said she could never have thought it, another said
Robin was a Fool; a Third said, she would not believe a Word of it, and she
would warrant that Robin would tell the Story another way; but the old Lady, who
was resolve'd to go to the bottom of it, before I could have the least
Opportunity of acquainting her Son with what had pass'd, resolve'd too, that she
would talk with her Son immediately, and to that purpose sent for him, for he
was gone but to a Lawyer's House in the Town, and upon her sending he returned
immediately.
    Upon his coming up to them, for they were all together, Sit down Robin, says
the old Lady, I must have some talk with you; with all my Heart, Madam, says
Robin, looking very Merry, I hope it is about a good Wife, for I am at a great
Loss in that Affair: How can that be, says his Mother, did you not say you
resolve'd to have Mrs. Betty? Ay Madam, says Robin, but there is one that has
forbid the Banns: Forbid the Banns, who can that be? Even Mrs. Betty herself,
says Robin. How so, says his Mother, have you ask'd her the Question then? Yes
indeed Madam, says Robin, I have attack'd her in Form five times since she was
Sick, and am beaten off: the Jade is so stout, she won't Capitulate, nor Yield
upon any Terms, except such as I can't effectually grant: Explain your self,
says the Mother, for I am surpris'd, I do not understand you, I hope you are not
in Earnest.
    Why, Madam, says he, the Case is plain enough upon me, it explains its self;
she won't have me, she says, is not that plain enough? I think 'tis plain, and
pretty rough too; Well, but, says the Mother, you talk or Conditions, that you
cannot grant, what does she want a Settlement? Her Joynter ought to be according
to her Portion; what does she bring? Nay, as to Fortune, says Robin, she is rich
enough; I am satisfied in that Point; but 'tis I that am not able to come up to
her Terms, and she is possitive she will not have me without.
    Here the Sisters put in, Madam, says the Second Sister, 'tis impossible to
be serious with him, he will never give a direct Answer to any thing; you had
better let him alone, and talk no more of it, you know how to dispose of her out
of his way. Robin was a little warm'd with his Sister's Rudeness, but he was
even with her presently; there are two sorts of People, Madam, says he, turning
to his Mother, that there is no contending with, that is a wise Body and a Fool,
'tis a little hard I should engage with both of them together.
    The younger Sister then put in, we must be Fools indeed, says she, in my
Brother's Opinion, that he should make us believe, he has seriously ask'd Mrs.
Betty to marry him, and she has refuse'd him.
    Answer, and Answer not, says Solomon, reply'd her Brother: When your Brother
had said that he had ask'd her no less than five Times, and that she possitively
denied him, methinks a younger Sister need not question the Truth of it, when
her Mother did not: My Mother you see did not understand it, says the Second
Sister: There's some Difference, says Robin, between desiring me to explain it,
and telling me she did not believe it.
    Well but Son, says the Old Lady, if you are disposed to let us into the
Mystery of it. What were these hard Conditions? Yes Madam, says Robin, I had
done it before now, if the Teazers here had not worried me by way of
Interruption: The Conditions are, that I bring my Father and you to Consent to
it, and without that, she protests she will never see me more upon that Head;
and the Conditions, as I said, I suppose I shall never be able to Grant; I hope
my warm Sisters will be answer'd now, and blush a little.
    This Answer was surprising to them all, tho' less to the Mother, because of
what I had said to her; as to the Daughters they stood Mute a great while; but
the Mother said with some Passion, Well I heard this before, but I could not
believe it, but if it is so, then we have all done Betty wrong, and she has
behave'd better than I expect'd; Nay, says the eldest Sister, if it is so, she
has acted Handsomely indeed: I confess, says the Mother, it was none of her
Fault, if he was enough Fool to take a Fancy to her; but to give such an Answer
to him, shows more Respect to us, than I can tell how to express; I shall value
the Girl the better for it, as long as I know her. But I shall not, says Robin,
unless you will give your Consent; I'll consider of that a while, says the
Mother, I assure you, if there were not some other Objections, this Conduct of
hers would go a great way to bring me to Consent: I wish it would go quite thro'
with it, says Robin; if you had as much thought about making me easy, as you
have about making me Rich, you would soon Consent to it.
    Why Robin, says the Mother again, are you really in Earnest? Would you fain
have her? Really Madam, says Robin, I think 'tis hard you should question me
again upon that Head; I won't say that I will have her, how can I resolve that
Point, when you see I cannot have her without your Consent; but this I will say,
I am Earnest, that I will never have any Body else, if I can help it; Betty or
no Body is the Word, and the Question which of the Two shall be in your Breast
to decide Madam, provided only, That my good humour'd Sisters here, may have no
Vote in it.
    All this was dreadful to me, for the Mother began to yield, and Robin
press'd her Home in it: On the other hand, she advised with the Eldest Son, and
he used all the Arguments in the World to perswade her to consent; alleging his
Brother's Passionate Love for me, and my generous Regard to the Family, in
refusing my own Advantages upon such a nice Point of Honour, and a Thousand such
Things: And as to the Father, he was a Man in a hurry of public Affairs, and
getting Money, seldom at Home, thoughtful of the main Chance, but left all those
things to his Wife.
    You may easily believe, that when the Plot was thus, as they thought broke
out: It was not so Difficult, or so Dangerous, for the Elder Brother, who no
Body suspected of any thing, to have a freer Access than before: Nay, the
Mother, which was just as he wished, Propos'd it to him to talk with Mrs. Betty:
it may be Son, said she, you may see farther into the Thing than I; and see if
she has been so Possitive as Robin says she has been, or no. This was as well as
he could wish, and he as it were yielding to talk with me at his Mother's
Request, she brought me to him into her own Chamber; told me her Son had some
Business with me at her Request, and then she left us together, and he shut the
Door after her.
    He came back to me, and took me in his Arms and kiss'd me very Tenderly; but
told me it was now come to that Crisis, that I should make my self Happy or
Miserable, as long as I liv'd: That if I could not comply to his Desire, we
should both be Ruin'd: Then he told me the whole Story between Robin, as he
call'd him, and his Mother, and his Sisters, and himself, as above: And now dear
Child, says he, consider what it will be to marry a Gentleman of a good Family,
in good Circumstances, and with the Consent of the whole House, and to enjoy all
that the World can give you; And what on the other hand, to be sunk into the
dark Circumstances of a Woman that has lost her Reputation; and that tho' I
shall be a private Friend to you while I live, yet as I shall be suspected
always, so you will be afraid to see me, and I shall be afraid to own you.
    He gave me no time to Reply, but went on with me thus: What has happened
between us Child, so long as we both agree to do so, may be buried and
forgotten: I shall always be your sincere Friend, without any Inclination to
nearer Intimacy, when you become my Sister; and we shall have all the honest
part of Conversation without any Reproaches between us, of having done amiss: I
beg of you to consider it, and do not stand in the way of your own Safety and
Prosperity; and to satisfy you that I am Sincere, added he, I here offer you
Five Hundred Pounds to make you some amends for the Freedoms I have taken with
you, which we shall look upon as some of the Follies of our Lives, which 'tis
hoped we may repent of.
    He spoke this in so much more moving Terms than it is possible for me to
express, that you may suppose as he held me above an Hour and Half in that
Discourse, so he answer'd all my Objections, and fortified his Discourse with
all the Arguments that humane Wit and Art could devise.
    I cannot say however, that any thing he said made Impression enough upon me,
so as to give me any thought of the Matter, till he told me at last very
plainly, that if I refuse'd, he was sorry to add, that he could never go on with
me in that Station as we stood before; that tho' he love'd me as well as ever,
and that I was as agreeable to him; yet the Sense of Virtue had not so forsaken
him as to suffer him to lye with a Woman that his Brother courted to make his
Wife; that if he took his Leave of me, with a denial from me in this Affair,
whatever he might do for me in the Point of Support, grounded on his first
Engagement of maintaining me, yet he would not have me be surpris'd, that he was
obliged to tell me, he could not allow himself to see me any more; and that
indeed I could not expect it of him.
    I received this last Part with some Tokens of Surprise and Disorder, and had
much ado, to avoid sinking down, for indeed I love'd him to an Extravagance, not
easy to imagine; but he perceive'd my Disorder, and entreated me to consider
seriously of it, assured me that it was the only way to preserve our mutual
Affection; that in this Station we might love as Friends, with the utmost
Passion, and with a love of Relation untainted, free from our own just
Reproaches, and free from other People's Suspicions: That he should ever
acknowledge his happiness owing to me; that he would be Debtor to me as long as
he liv'd, and would be paying that Debt as long as he had Breath: Thus he
wrought me up, in short, to a kind of Hesitation in the Matter; having the
Dangers on one Side represented in lively Figures, and indeed heighten'd by my
Imagination of being turn'd out to the wide World, a meer Cast-off Whore, for it
was no less, and perhaps expos'd as such; with little to provide for myself;
with no Friend, no Acquaintance in the whole World, out of that Town, and there
I could not pretend to stay; all this terrify'd me to the last Degree, and he
took care upon all Occasions to lay it home to me, in the worst Colours; on the
other hand, he fail'd not to set forth the easy prosperous Life, which I was
going to live.
    He answer'd all that I could object from Affection, and from former
Engagements, with telling me the Necessity that was before us of taking other
Measures now; and as to his Promises of Marriage, the Nature of things, he said,
had put an End to that, by the Probability of my being his Brother's Wife,
before the time to which his Promises all referr'd.
    Thus in a Word, I may say, he reason'd me out of my Reason; he conquer'd all
my Arguments, and I began to see a Danger that I was in, which I had not
considered of before, and that was, of being drop'd by both of them, and left
alone in the World to shift for my self.
    This, and his Perswasion, at length prevail'd with me to Consent, tho' with
so much Reluctance, that it was easy to see I should go to Church, like a Bear
to the Stake; I had some little Apprehensions about me too, lest my new Spouse,
who by the way, I had not the least Affection for, should be Skilful enough to
Challenge me on another Account, upon our first coming to Bed together; but
whether he did it with design or not, I know not; but his elder Brother took
care to make him very much Fuddled before he went to Bed, so that I had the
Satisfaction of a drunken Bedfellow the first Night: How he did it I know not,
but I concluded that he certainly contrive'd it, that his Brother might be able
to make no judgement of the difference between a Maid and a married Woman, nor
did he ever entertain any Notions of it, or disturb his Thoughts about it.
    I should go back a little here, to where I left off; the elder Brother
having thus managed me, his next Business was to manage his Mother, and he never
left till he had brought her to acquiesce, and be passive even without
acquainting the Father, other than by Post Letters: So that she consented to our
Marrying privately, leaving her to manage the Father afterwards.
    Then he cajol'd with his Brother, and persuaded him what Service he had done
him, and how he had brought his Mother to Consent, which tho' True, was not
indeed done to serve him, but to serve himself; but thus diligently did he cheat
him, and had the Thanks of a faithful Friend for shifting off his Whore into his
Brother's Arms for a Wife. So naturally do Men give up Honour and Justice, and
even Christianity to secure themselves.
    I must now come back to Brother Robin, as we always call'd him, who having
got his Mother's Consent, as above, came big with the News to me, and told me
the whole Story of it, with a Sincerity so visible, that I must confess it
grieve'd me, that I must be the Instrument to abuse so honest a Gentleman; but
there was no Remedy, he would have me, and I was not oblige'd to tell him, that I
was his Brother's Whore, tho' I had no other way to put him off; so I came
gradually into it, and behold we were married.
    Modesty forbids me to reveal the Secrets of the Marriage Bed, but nothing
could have happen'd more suitable to my Circumstances than that, as above, my
Husband was so Fuddled when he came to Bed, that he could not remember in the
Morning, whether he had had any Conversation with me or no, and I was obliged to
tell him he had, tho' in reality he had not, that I might be sure he could make
no enquiry about any thing else.
    It concerns the Story in Hand very little to enter into the farther
Particulars of the Family, or of my self, for the five Years that I liv'd with
this Husband, only to observe that I had two Children by him, and that at the
end of the five Years he died: He had been really a very good Husband to me, and
we liv'd very agreeably together; but as he had not received much from them, and
had in the little time he liv'd acquir'd no great Matters, so my Circumstances
were not great, nor was I much mended by the Match: Indeed I had preserve'd the
elder Brother's Bonds to me, to pay me 500l. which he offered me for my Consent
to marry his Brother; and this, with what I had saved of the Money he formerly
gave me, and about as much more by my Husband, left me a Widow with about 1200l.
in my Pocket.
    My two Children were indeed taken happily off of my Hands, by my Husband's
Father and Mother, and that was all they got by Mrs. Betty.
    I confess I was not suitably affected with the loss of my Husband; nor can I
say, that I ever love'd him as I ought to have done, or was suitable to the good
Usage I had from him, for he was a tender, kind, good humour'd Man as any Woman
could desire; but his Brother being so always in my Sight, at least while we
were in the Country, was a continual Snare to me; and I never was in Bed with my
Husband, but I wish'd my self in the Arms of his Brother; and tho' his Brother
never offer'd me the least Kindness that way, after our Marriage, but carried it
just as a Brother ought to do; yet it was impossible for me to do so to him: In
short, I committed Adultery and Incest with him every Day in my Desires, which
without doubt, was as effeftually Criminal.
    Before my Husband dy'd, his elder Brother was married, and we being then
remove'd to London, were written to by the old Lady to come and be at the
Wedding; my Husband went, but I pretended Indisposition, so I staid behind; for
in short, I could not bear the sight of his being given to another Woman, tho' I
knew I was never to have him my self.
    I was now as above, left loose to the World, and being still young and
handsome, as every Body said of me, and I assure you I thought my self so, and
with a tolerable Fortune in my Pocket, I put no small Value upon my self: I was
courted by several very considerable Tradesmen, and particularly very warmly by
one, a Linnen-Draper, at whose House, after my Husband's Death, I took a
Lodging, his Sister being my Acquaintance; here I had all the Liberty and
Opportunity to be Gay, and appear in Company that I could desire; my Landlord's
Sister being one of the Maddest, Gayest things alive, and not so much Mistress
of her Vertue as I thought at first she had been: She brought me into a World of
wild Company, and even brought home several Persons, such as she lik'd well
enough to Gratify, to see her pretty Widow: Now as Fame and Fools make an
Assembly, I was here wonderfully caress'd; had abundance of Admirers, and such
as call'd themselves Lovers; but I found not one fair Proposal among them all;
as for their common Design, that I understood too well to be drawn into any more
Snares of that Kind: The case was alter'd with me, I had Money in my Pocket, and
had nothing to say to them: I had been trick'd once by that Cheat call'd Love,
but the Game was over, I was resolve'd now to be married or nothing, and to be
well married or not at all.
    I love'd the Company indeed of Men of Mirth and Wit, and was often
entertain'd with such, as I was also with others; but I found by just
Observation, that the brightest Men came upon the dullest Errand, that is to say
, the dullest, as to what I aim'd at; on the other hand, those who came with the
best Proposals were the dullest and most disagreeable Part of the World: I was
not averse to a Tradesman, but then I would have a Tradesman, Forsooth, that was
something of a Gentleman too; that when my Husband had a mind to carry me to the
Court, or to the Play, he might become a Sword, and look as like a Gentleman as
another Man; and not like one that had the mark of his Apron-strings upon his
Coat, or the mark of his Hat upon his Perriwig; that should look as if he was
set on to his Sword, when his Sword was put on to him, and that carried his
Trade in his Countenance.
    Well, at last I found this amphibious Creature, this Land-water-thing,
call'd, a Gentleman-Tradesman, and as a just Plague upon my Folly, I was catch'd
in the very Snare which, as I might say, I laid for my self.
    This was a Draper too, for tho' my Comrade would have bargain'd for me with
her Brother; yet when they came to the Point, it was it seems for a Mistress,
and I kept true to this Notion, that a Woman should never be kept for a
Mistress, that had Money to make her self a Wife.
    Thus my Pride, not my Principle, my Money, not my Vertue, kept me Honest;
tho', as it prov'd, I found I had much better have been Sold by my She Comrade,
to her Brother, than have sold my self as I did to a Tradesman, that was Rake,
Gentleman, Shop-keeper, and Beggar all together.
    But I was hurried on (by my Fancy to a Gentleman) to Ruin my self in the
grossest Manner that ever Woman did; for my new Husband coming to a lump of
Money at once, fell into such a Profusion of Expense, that all I had, and all he
had, would not have held it out above one Year.
    He was very fond of me for about a quarter of a Year, and what I got by
that, was, that I had the Pleasure of seeing a great deal of my Money spent upon
my self. Come my Dear, says he to me one Day, shall we go and take a turn into
the Country for a Week? Ay my dear, says I, Whither would you go? I care not
whither, says he, but I have a mind to look like Quality for a Week, we'll go to
Oxford, says he: How, says I, shall we go, I am no Horse-Woman, and 'tis too far
for a Coach: Too far, says he, no Place is too far for a Coach and Six: If I
carry you out, you shall Travel like a Dutchess: Hum, says I, my Dear, 'tis a
Frolick, but if you have a mind to it, I don't care. Well, the time was
appointed, we had a Rich Coach, very good Horses, a Coachman, Postillion, and
two Footmen in very good Liveries; a Gentleman on Horseback, and a Page with a
Feather in his Hat upon another Horse; the Servants all call'd him my Lord, and
I was her Honour, the Countess, and thus we travel'd to Oxford, and a pleasant
Journey we had; for give him his due, not a Beggar alive knew better how to be a
Lord than my Husband: We saw all the Rarities at Oxford, talk'd with two or
three Fellows of Colleges, about putting a Nephew, that was left to his
Lordship's Care to the University, and of their being his Tutors; we diverted
our selves with bantering several other poor Scholars, with the hopes of being
at least his Lordship's Chaplain and putting on a Scarf; and thus having liv'd
like Quality indeed, as to Expense, we went away for Northampton, and in a Word,
in about Twelve Days' ramble came Home again, to the Tune of about 93l. Expense.
    Vanity is the Perfection of a Fop; my Husband had this Excellence, that he
valued nothing of Expense; as his History, you may be sure, has very little
weight in it, 'tis enough to tell you, that in about two Years and a Quarter he
Broke, got into a Spunging-House, being arrested in an Action too heavy for him
to give Bail to, so he sent for me to come to him.
    It was no surprise to me, for I had foreseen some-thing before that all was
going to Wreck, and had been taking care to reserve something if I could for my
self: But when he sent for me, he behave'd much better than I expected: He told
me plainly, he had plaid the Fool, and suffer'd himself to be Surprise'd, which
he might have prevented: that now he foresaw he could not stand it, and
therefore he would have me go Home, and in the Night take away every thing I had
in the House of any Value, and secure it; and after that, he told me, that if I
could get away 100l. or 200l. in Goods out of the Shop, I should do it; only,
says he, let me know nothing of it, neither what you take, or whither you carry
it; for as for me, says he, I am resolve'd to get out of this House and be gone;
and if you never hear of me more, My Dear, says he, I wish you well; lam only
sorry for the Injury I have done you: He said some very handsome Things to me
indeed at Parting; for I told you he was a Gentleman, and that was all the
Benefit I had of his being so; that he used me very handsomely, even to the
last, only spent all I had, and left me to Rob the Creditors for something to
subsist on.
    However, I did as he bad me, that you may be sure, and having thus taken my
leave of him I never saw him more; for he found means to break out of the
Bailiff's House that Night, or the next: How I knew not, for I could come at no
Knowledge of anything, more than this, that he came Home about three a Clock in
the Morning, caus'd the rest of his Goods to be remove'd into the Mint, and the
Shop to be shut up; and having raise'd what Money he could, he got over to France
, from whence I had one or two Letters from him, and no more.
    I did not see him when he came Home, for he having given me such
Instructions as above, and I having made the best of my Time, I had no more
Business back again at the House, not knowing but I might have been stop'd there
by the Creditors; for a Commission of Bankrupt, being soon after Issued, they
might have stop'd me by Orders from the Commissioners: But my Husband having
desperately got out from the Bailiff's by letting himself down from almost the
top of the House, to the top of another Building, and leaping from thence, which
was almost two Stories, and which was enough indeed to have broken his Neck: He
came home and got away his Goods, before the Creditors could come to Seize, that
is to say, before they could get out the Commission, and be ready to send their
Officers to take Possession.
    My Husband was so civil to me, for still I say he was much of a Gentleman,
that in the first Letter he wrote me, he let me know where he had Pawn'd 20
Pieces of fine Holland for 30l. which were worth above 90l., and enclos'd me the
Token, for the taking them up, paying the Money, which I did, and made in time
above 100l. of them, having Leisure to cut them, and sell them to private
Families, as opportunity offer'd.
    However, with all this, and all that I had secure'd before, I found upon
casting things up, my Case was very much alter'd, and my Fortune much lessen'd;
for including the Hollands, and a parcel of fine Muslins, which I carry'd off
before, and some Plate, and other things; I found I could hardly muster up 500l.
and my Condition was very odd, for tho' I had no Child, (I had had one by my
Gentleman Draper, but it was buried,) yet I was a Widow bewitch'd, I had a
Husband, and no Husband, and I could not pretend to Marry again, though I knew
well enough my Husband would never see England any more, if he liv'd fifty
Years: Thus I say, I was limited from Marriage, what Offer soever might be made
me; and I had not one Friend to advise with, in the Condition I was in, at least
not one who I could Trust the Secret of my Circumstances to, for if the
Commissioners were to have been inform'd where I was, I should have been fetch'd
up, and all I had save'd be taken away.
    Upon these Apprehensions, the first thing I did, was to go quite out of my
Knowledge, and go by another Name: This I did effectually, for I went into the
Mint too, took Lodgings in a very private Place, dress'd me up in the Habit of a
Widow, and call'd my self Mrs. Flanders.
    Here, however, I conceal'd my self, and tho' my new Acquaintance knew
nothing of me, yet I soon got a great deal of Company about me; and whether it
be that Women are scarce among the People that generally are to be found there;
or that some Consolations in the Miseries of that Place, are more requisite than
on other Occasions, I soon found that an agreeable Woman was exceedingly
valuable among the Sons of Affliction there; and that those that cou'd not pay
Half a Crown in the Pound to their Creditors, and run in Debt at the Sign of the
Bull for their Dinners, would yet find Money for a Supper, if they lik'd the
Woman.
    However, I kept myself safe yet, tho' I began like my Lord Rochester's
Mistress, that love'd his Company, but would not admit him farther, to have the
Scandal of a Whore, without the Joy; and upon this score, tir'd with the Place,
and with the Company too, I began to think of Removing.
    It was indeed a Subject of strange Reflection to me, to see Men in the most
perplex'd Circumstances, who were reduce'd some Degress below being ruin'd, whose
Families were Objects of their own Terror and other People's Charity; yet while
a Penny lasted, nay, even beyond it, endeavouring to drown their Sorrow in their
Wickedness; heaping up more Guilt upon themselves, labouring to forget former
things, which now it was the proper time to remember, making more Work for
Repentance, and Sinning on, as a Remedy for Sin past.
    But it is none of my Talent to preach; these Men were too wicked, even for
me; there was something horrid and absurd in their way of Sinning, for it was
all a force even upon themselves; they did not only act against Conscience, but
against Nature, and nothing was more easy than to see how Sighs would interrupt
their Songs, and paleness and anguish sit upon their Brows, in spite of the
force'd Smiles they put on; nay, sometimes it would break out at their very
Mouths, when they had parted with their Money for a lewd Treat, or a wicked
Embrace; I have heard them, turning about, fetch a deep Sigh, and cry what a Dog
am I! Well Betty, my Dear, I'll drink thy health tho', meaning the Honest Wife,
that perhaps had not a Half Crown for herself, and three or four Children: The
next Morning they were at their Penitentials again, and perhaps the poor weeping
Wife comes over to him, either brings him some Account of what his Creditors are
doing, and how she and the Children are turn'd out of Doors, or some other
dreadful News; and this adds to his self Reproaches; but when he has thought and
por'd on it till he is almost Mad, having no Principles to support him, nothing
within him, or above him, to Comfort him; but finding it all Darkness on every
Side, he flies to the same Relief again, viz. to drink it away, debauch it away,
and falling into Company of Men in just the same Condition with himself, he
repeats the Crime, and thus he goes every Day one Step onward of his way to
Destruction.
    I was not wicked enough for such Fellows as these yet, on the contrary, I
began to consider here very seriously what I had to do; how things stood with
me, and what Course I ought to take; I knew I had no Friends, no not one Friend
or Relation in the World; and that little I had left apparently wasted, which
when it was gone, I saw nothing but Misery and Starving was before me: Upon
these Considerations, I say, and fill'd with Horror at the Place I was in, I
resolve'd to be gone.
    I had made an Acquaintance with a sober good sort of a Woman, who was a
Widow too like me, but in better Circumstances; her Husband had been a Captain
of a Ship, and having had the Misfortune to be Cast away coming Home from the
West Indies, was so reduce'd by the Loss, that tho' he had saved his Life then,
it broke his Heart, and kill'd him afterwards, and his Widow being persued by
the Creditors, was force'd to take Shelter in the Mint: She soon made things up
with the help of Friends, and was at Liberty again; and finding that I rather
was there to be conceal'd, than by any particular Prosecutions, and finding also
that I agreed with her, or rather she with me in a just Abhorrence of the Place,
and of the Company; she invited me to go home with her, till I could put myself
in some posture of settling in the World to my Mind; withal telling me, that it
was Ten to One, but some good Captain of a Ship might take a Fancy to me, and
Court me, in that part of the Town where she liv'd.
    I accepted of her Offer, and was with her half a Year, and should have been
longer, but in that interval what she propos'd to me happen'd to herself, and
she marry'd very much to her Advantage; but whose Fortune soever was upon the
Increase, mine seem'd to be upon the Wane, and I found nothing present, except
two or three Boatswains, or such Fellows, but as for the Commanders they were
generally of two Sorts. 1. Such as having good Business, that is to say, a good
Ship, resolve'd not to Marry, but with Advantage. 2. Such as being out of Employ,
wanted a Wife to help them to a Ship, I mean, (1). A Wife, who having some Money
could enable them to hold a good part of a Ship themselves, so to encourage
Owners to come in; or (2.) A Wife, who if she had not Money, had Friends who
were concern'd in Shipping, and so could help to put the young Man into a good
Ship, and neither of these was my Case; so I look'd like one that was to lie on
Hand.
    This Knowledge I soon learnt by Experience, viz. That the State of Things
was altered, as to Matrimony, that Marriages were here the Consequences of
politick Schemes, for forming Interests, carrying on Business, and that LOVE had
no Share, or but very little in the Matter.
    That, as my Sister in Law, at Colchester had said, Beauty, Wit, Manners,
Sense, good Humour, good Behaviour, Education, Vertue, Piety, or any other
Qualification, whether of Body or Mind, had no power to recommend: That Money
only made a Woman agreeable: That Men chose Mistresses indeed by the gust of
their Affection, and it was requisite for a Whore to be Handsome, well shap'd,
have a good Mein, and a graceful Behaviour; but that for a Wife, no Deformity
would shock the Fancy, no ill Qualities the judgement; the Money was the thing;
the Portion was neither crooked, or Monstrous, but the Money was always
agreeable, whatever the Wife was.
    On the other Hand, as the Market run all on the Mens side, I found the Women
had lost the Privilege of saying No; that it was a Favour now for a Woman to
have The Question ask'd, and if any young Lady had so much Arrogance as to
Counterfeit a Negative, she never had the Opportunity of denying twice; much
less of Recovering that false Step, and accepting what she had seem'd to
decline: The Men had such Choice every where, that the Case of the Women was
very unhappy; for they seem'd to Ply at every Door, and if the Man was by great
Chance refuse'd at one House, he was sure to be receive'd at the next.
    Besides this, I observe'd that the Men made no scruple to set themselves out,
and to go a Fortune-Hunting, as they call it, when they had really no Fortune
themselves to demand it, or Merit to deserve it; and they carry'd it so high,
that a Woman was scarce allow'd to enquire after the Character or Estate, of the
Person that pretended to her: This, I had an Example of, in a young Lady at the
next House to me, and with whom I had contracted an Intimacy; she was Courted by
a young Captain, and tho' she had near 2000l. to her Fortune, she did but
enquire of some of his Neighbours about his Character, his Morals, or Substance;
and he took Occasion at the next Visit to let her know, truly, that he took it
very ill, and that he should not give her the Trouble of his Visits any more: I
heard of it, and I had begun my Acquaintance with her, I went to see her upon
it: She enter'd into a close Conversation with me about it, and unbosom'd
herself very freely; I perceive'd presently that tho' she thought herself very
ill us'd, yet she had no power to resent it; that she was exceedingly piqu'd she
had lost him, and particularly that another of less Fortune had gain'd him.
    I fortify'd her Mind against such a Meanness, as I call'd it; I told her,
that as low as I was in the World, I would have despis'd a Man that should think
I ought to take him upon his own Recommendation only; also I told her, that as
she had a good Fortune, she had no need to stoop to the Disaster of the Times;
that it was enough, that the Men could insult us that had but little Money, but
if she suffer'd such an Affront to pass upon her without resenting it, she would
be render'd low-priz'd upon all Occasions, that a Woman can never want an
Opportunity to be reveng'd of a Man that has us'd her ill, and that there were
ways enough to humble such a Fellow as that, or else certainly Women were the
most unhappy Creatures in the World.
    She was very well pleas'd with the Discourse, and told me seriously that she
would be very glad to make him sensible of her resentment, and either to bring
him on again, or have the Satisfaction of her Revenge being as public as
possible.
    I told her, that if she would take my Advice, I would tell her how she
should obtain her Wishes in both those things; and that I would engage I would
bring the Man to her Door again, and make him beg to be let in: She smile'd at
that, and soon let me see, that if he came to her Door, her resentment was not
so great, to let him stand long there.
    However, she listened very willingly to my Offer of Advice; so I told her,
that the first thing she ought to do, was a piece of Justice to herself; namely,
that whereas he had reported among the Ladies, that he had left her, and
pretended to give the Advantage of the Negative to himself, she should take care
to have it well spread among the Women, which she could not fail of an
Opportunity to do, that she had enquired into his Circumstances, and found he
was not the Man he pretended to be: Let them be told too Madam, said I, that you
found he was not the Man you expected, and that you thought it was not safe to
meddle with him, that you heard he was of an ill Temper, and that he boasted how
he had us'd the Women ill upon many Occasions, and that particularly he was
debauch'd in his Morals, &amp;c. The last of which indeed had some Truth in it;
but I did not find that she seem'd to like him much the worse for that part.
    She came most readily into all this, and immediately she went to Work to
find Instruments, she had very little difficulty in the Search; for telling her
Story in general to a Couple of her Gossips, it was the Chat of the Tea Table
all over that part of the Town, and I met with it wherever I visited: Also, as
it was known that I was acquainted with the young Lady her self, my Opinion was
ask'd very often, and I confirm'd it with all the necessary Aggravations, and
set out his Character in the blackest Colours; and as a piece of secret
Intelligence, I added, what the Gossips knew nothing of, viz. That I had heard
he was in very bad Circumstances; that he was under a necessity of a Fortune to
support his Interest with the Owners of the Ship he Commanded: That his own Part
was not paid for, and if it was not paid quickly, his Owners would put him out
of the Ship, and his Chief Mate was likely to Command it, who offer'd to buy
that Part which the Captain had promise'd to take.
    I added, for I was heartily piqu'd at the Rogue, as I call'd him, that I had
heard a Rumour too, that he had a Wife alive at Plymouth, and another in the
West Indies, a thing which they all knew was not very uncommon for such kind of
Gentlemen.
    This work'd as we both desire'd it, for presently the young Lady at the next
Door, who had a Father and Mother that Govern'd both her, and her Fortune, was
shut up, and her Father forbid him the House: Also in one Place more the Woman
had the Courage, however strange it was, to say No; and he could try no where
but he was Reproached with his Pride, and that he pretended not to give the
Women leave to enquire into his Character, and the like.
    By this time he began to be sensible of his mistake; and seeing all the
Women on that side the Water alarm'd, he went over to Ratcliff, and got access
to some of the Ladies there; but tho' the young Women there too, were according
to the Fate of the Day, pretty willing to be ask'd, yet such was his ill luck,
that his Character follow'd him over the Water; so that tho' he might have had
Wives enough, yet it did not happen among the Women that had good Fortunes,
which was what he wanted.
    But this was not all; she very ingeniously manage'd another thing her self,
for she got a young Gentleman, who was a Relation, to come and visit her two or
three times a Week in a very fine Chariot and good Liveries, and her two Agents
and I also, presently spread a Report all over, that this Gentleman came to
Court her; that he was a Gentleman of a Thousand Pounds a Year, and that he was
fallen in Love with her, and that she was going to her Aunt's in the City,
because it was inconvenient for the Gentleman to come to her with his Coach to
Rotherbith, the Streets being so narrow and difficult.
    This took immediately, the Captain was laugh'd at in all Companies, and was
ready to hang himself; he tried all the ways possible to come at her again, and
wrote the most passionate Letters to her in the World, and in short, by great
Application, obtained leave to wait on her again, as he said, only to clear his
Reputation.
    At this meeting she had her full Revenge of him; for she told him, she
wonder'd what he took her to be, that she should admit any man to a Treaty of so
much Consequence, as that of Marriage, without enquiring into his Circumstances;
that if he thought she was to be huff'd into Wedlock, and that she was in the
same Circumstances which her Neighbours might be in, viz. to take up with the
first good Christian that came, he was mistaken; that in a word his Character
was really bad, or he was very ill beholden to his Neighbours; and that unless
he could clear up some Points, in which she had justly been prejudiced, she had
no more to say to him, but give him the Satisfaction of knowing, that she was
not afraid to say NO, either to him, or any Man else.
    With that she told him what she had heard, or rather raise'd herself by my
Means, of his Character; his not having paid for the Part he pretended to own of
the Ship he Commanded; of the Resolution of his Owners to put him out of the
Command, and to put his Mate in his stead; and of the Scandal raise'd on his
Morals; his having been reproach'd with such and such Women, and his having a
Wife at Plymouth, and another in the West-Indies, and the like; and she ask'd
him whether she had not good Reason, if these things were not clear'd up, to
refuse him and to insist upon having Satisfaction in Points so significant as
they were?
    He was so confounded at her Discourse, that he could not answer a Word, and
she began to believe that all was true, by his Disorder, tho' she knew that she
had been the Raiser of these Reports herself.
    After some time he recovered a little, and from that time was the most
humble, modest, and importunate Man alive in is Courtship.
    She ask'd him if he thought she was so at her last Shift, that she could or
ought to bear such Treatment, and if he did not see that she did not want those
who thought it worth their while to come farther to her than he did, meaning the
Gentleman whom she had brought to visit her by way of sham.
    She brought him by these Tricks to submit to all possible Measures to
satisfy her, as well of his Circumstances, as of his Behaviour. He brought her
undeniable Evidence of his having paid for his part of the Ship; he brought her
Certificates from his Owners, that the Report of their intending to remove him
from the Command of the Ship, was false and groundless; in short, he was quite
the reverse of what he was before.
    Thus I convinced her, that if the Men made their Advantage of our Sex in the
Affair of Marriage, upon the Supposition of there being such a Choice to be had,
and of the Women being so easy, it was only owing to this, that the Women wanted
Courage to maintain their Ground, and that according to my Lord Rochester
 
»A Woman's ne'er so ruin'd but she can
Revenge herself on her Undoer, Man.«
 
After these things this young Lady plaid her part so well, that tho' she
resolve'd to have him, and that indeed having him was the main bent of her
Design, yet she made his obtaining her to be TO HIM the most difficult thing in
the World; and this she did, not by a haughty reserve'd Carriage, but by a just
Policy, playing back upon him his own Game; for as he pretended by a kind of
lofty Carriage, to place himself above the occasion of a Character, she broke
with him upon that Subject, and at the same time that she made him submit to all
possible enquiry after his Affairs, she apparently shut the Door against his
looking into her own.
    It was enough to him to obtain her for a Wife, as to what she had, she told
him plainly, that as he knew her Circumstances, it was but just she should know
his; and tho' at the same time he had only known her Circumstances by common
Fame, yet he had made so many Protestations of his Passion for her, that he
could ask no more but her Hand to his grand Request, and the like ramble
according to the Custom of Lovers: In short, he left himself no room to ask any
more Questions about her Estate, and she took the Advantage of it; for she
placed part of her Fortune so in Trustees, without letting him know anything of
it, that it was quite out of his Reach, and made him be very well contented with
the rest.
    It is true she was pretty well besides, that is to say, she had about 1400l.
in Money, which she gave him, and the other, after some time, she brought to
light, as a Perquisite to herself, which he was to accept as a mighty Favour,
seeing, though it was not to be his, it might ease him in the Article of her
Particular Expenses; and I must add, that by this Conduct, the Gentleman himself
became not only more humble in his Applications to her to obtain her, but also
was much the more an obliging Husband when he had her: I cannot but remind the
Ladies how much they place themselves below the common Station of a Wife, which
if I may be allow'd not to be Partial, is low enough already; I say, they place
themselves below their common Station, and prepare their own Mortifications, by
their submitting so to be insulted by the Men before-hand, which I confess I see
no Necessity of.
    This Relation may serve therefore to let the Ladies see, that the Advantage
is not so much on the other Side, as the Men think it is; and that tho' it may
be true, the Men have but too much Choice among us; and that some Women may be
found, who will Dishonour themselves, be Cheap, and too Easy to come at; yet if
they will have Women worth having, they may find them as uncomeatable as ever;
and that those that are otherwise have often such Deficiencies, when had, as
rather recommend the Ladies that are difficult, than encourage the Men to go on
with their easy Courtship, and exped Wives equally valuable that will come at
first Call.
    Nothing is more certain, than that the Ladies always gain of the Men, by
keeping their Ground, and letting their pretended Lovers see they can Resent
being slighted, and that they are not afraid of saying NO. They insult us
mightily, with telling us of the Number of Women; that the Wars and the Sea, and
Trade, and other Incidents have carried the Men so much away, that there is no
Proportion between the Numbers of the Sexes; but I am far from granting that the
Number of the Women is so great, or the Number of the Men so small; but if they
will have me tell the Truth, the Disadvantage of the Women is a terrible Scandal
upon the Men, and it lies here only; Namely, that the Age is so wicked, and the
Sex so Debauch'd, that in short the Number of such Men, as an honest Woman ought
to meddle with, is small indeed; and it is but here and there that a Man is to
be found who is fit for an honest Woman to venture upon.
    But the Consequence even of that too amounts to no more than this; that
Women ought to be the more Nice; for how do we know the just Character of the
Man that makes the Offer? To say that the Woman should be the more easy on this
Occasion, is to say, we should be the forwarder to venture, because of the
greatness of the Danger, which is very absurd.
    On the contrary, the Women have ten Thousand times the more Reason to be
wary, and backward, by how much the hazard of being betray'd is the greater, and
would the Ladies act the wary Part, they would discover every Cheat that
offer'd; for, in short, the Lives of very few Men now-a-Days will bear a
Character; and if the Ladies do but make a little Enquiry, they would soon be
able to distinguish the Men, and deliver themselves: As for Women that do not
think their own Safety worth their own Thought, that impatient of their present
State run into Matrimony, as a Horse rushes into the Battle; I can say nothing
to them but this, that they are a Sort of Ladies that are to be pray'd for among
the rest of distemper'd People, and they look like People that venture their
Estates in a Lottery where there is a Hundred Thousand Blanks to one Prize.
    No Man of common Sense will value a Woman the less for not giving up herself
at the first Attack, or for not accepting his Proposal without enquiring into
his Person or Character; on the contrary, he must think her the weakest of all
Creatures, as the Rate of Men now goes: In short, he must have a very
contemptible Opinion of her Capacities, that having but one Cast for her Life,
shall cast that Life away at once, and make Matrimony like Death, be a Leap in
the Dark.
    I would fain have the Conduct of my Sex a little regulated in this
Particular, which is the same thing in which of all the Parts of Life, I think
at this time we suffer most in: 'Tis nothing but lack of Courage, the fear of
not being married at all, and of that frightful State of Life, call'd an old
Maid. This, I say, is the Woman's Snare; but would the Ladies once but get above
that Fear, and manage rightly, they would more certainly avoid it by standing
their Ground, in a Case so absolutely necessary to their Felicity, than by
exposing themselves as they do; and if they did not marry so soon, they would
make themselves amends by marrying safer; she is always married too soon, who
gets a bad Husband, and she is never married too late, who gets a good one: In a
Word, there is no Woman, Deformity, or lost Reputation excepted, but if she
manages well, may be married safely one time or other; but if she precipitates
herself, it is ten Thousand to one but she is undone.
    But I come now to my own Case, in which there was at this time no little
Nicety. The Circumstances I was in, made the Offer of a good Husband, the most
necessary thing in the World to me; but I found soon that to be made Cheap and
Easy, was not the way: It soon began to be found that the Widow had no Fortune,
and to say this, was to say all that was Ill of me: Being well Bred, Handsome,
Witty, Modest, and Agreeable; all which I had allow'd to my Character, whether
justly, or no, is not to the Purpose: I say, all these would not do without the
Dross. In short, the Widow they said had no Money!
    I resolve'd therefore that it was necessary to change my Station, and make a
new Appearance in some other Place, and even to pass by another Name if I found
Occasion.
    I communicated my Thoughts to my Intimate Friend the Captain's Lady, who I
had so faithfully served in her Case with the Captain; and who was as ready to
serve me in the same kind as I could desire: I made no scruple to lay my
Circumstances open to her, my Stock was but low, for I had made but about 540l.
at the Close of my last Affair, and I had wasted some of that: However, I had
about 460l. left, a great many very rich clothes, a Gold Watch, and some Jewels,
tho' of no extraordinary Value, and about 30l. or 40l. left in Linnen not
dispos'd of.
    My Dear and Faithful Friend, the Captain's Wife, was so sensible of the
Service I had done her in the Affair above, that she was not only a steddy
Friend to me, but knowing my Circumstances, she frequently made me Presents as
Money came into her Hands; such as fully amounted to a Maintainance; so that I
spent none of my own; and at last she made this unhappy Proposal to me, viz.
that as we had observe'd, as above, how the Men made no scruple to set themselves
out as Persons meriting a Woman of Fortune of their own; it was but just to deal
with them in their own way, and if it was possible to deceive the Deceiver.
    The Captain's Lady, in short, put this Project into my Head, and told me if
I would be rul'd by her I should certainly get a Husband of Fortune, without
leaving him any room to Reproach me with want of my own: I told her that I would
give up my self wholly to her Directions, and that I would have neither Tongue
to speak, or Feet to step in that Affair, but as she should direct me; depending
that she would Extricate me out of every Difficulty that she brought me into,
which she said she would answer for.
    The first Step she put me upon, was to call her Cousin, and go to a
Relation's House of hers in the Country, where she directed me; and where she
brought her Husband to visit me, and calling me Cousin, she work'd Matters so
about, that her Husband and she together invited me most passionately to come to
Town and live with them, for they now liv'd in a quite different Place from
where they were before. In the next Place she tells her Husband that I had at
least 1500l. Fortune, and that I was like to have a great deal more.
    It was enough to tell her Husband this, there needed nothing on my Side; I
was but to sit still and wait the Event, for it presently went all over the
Neighbourhood that the young Widow at Captain-'s was a Fortune, that she had at
least 1500l., and perhaps a great deal more, and that the Captain said so, and
if the Captain was ask'd at any time about me, he made no scruple to affirm it,
tho' he knew not one Word of the Matter, other than that his Wife had told him
so; and in this he thought no Harm, for he really believe'd it to be so. With the
Reputation of this Fortune, I presently found my self bless'd with Admirers
enough, and that I had my Choice of Men, as they said they were, which by the
way confirms what I was saying before: This being my Case, I who had a subtil
Game to Play, had nothing now to do but to single out from them all, the
properest Man that might be for my Purpose; that is to say, the Man who was most
likely to depend upon the hear say of Fortune, and not enquire too far into the
Particulars; and unless I did this, I did nothing, for my Case would not bear
much Enquiry.
    I pick'd out my Man without much Difficulty, by the judgement I made of his
way of courting me: I had let him run on with his Protestations that he love'd me
above all the World; that if I would make him happy, that was enough; all which
I knew was upon Supposition that I was very Rich, tho' I never told him a Word
of it my self.
    This was my Man, but I was to try him to the Bottom, and indeed in that
consisted my Safety, for if he baulked, I knew I was undone, as surely as he was
undone if he took me; and if I did not make some scruple about his Fortune, it
was the way to lead him to raise some about mine; and first therefore, I
pretended on all Occasions to doubt his Sincerity, and told him, perhaps he only
courted me for my Fortune; he stop'd my Mouth in that Part, with the Thunder of
his Protestations as above, but still I pretended to doubt.
    One morning he pulls off his Diamond Ring, and writes upon the Glass of the
Sash in my Chamber this Line,
                           You I love, and you alone.
I read it and ask'd him to lend me the Ring, with which I wrote under it thus,
                         And so in Love says every one.
He takes his Ring again, and writes another Line thus,
                           Virtue alone is an Estate.
I borrowed it again and I wrote under it,
                       But Money's Virtue, Gold is Fate.
He colour'd as red as Fire to see me turn so quick upon him, and in a kind of
Rage told me he would Conquer me, and wrote again thus,
                       I scorn your Gold, and yet I Love.
I venture'd all upon the last cast of Poetry, as you'll see, for I wrote boldly
under his last.
                   I'm Poor: Let's see how kind you'll prove.
This was a sad Truth to me, whether he believe'd me or no I could not tell; I
supposed then that he did not. However he flew to me, took me in his Arms, and
kissing me very eagerly, and with the greatest Passion imaginable, he held me
fast till he call'd for a Pen and Ink, and told me, he could not wait the
tedious writing on a Glass, but pulling out a piece of Paper, he began and wrote
again,
                         Be mine with all your Poverty.
I took his Pen, and follow'd immediately thus,
                          Yet secretly you hope I Lye.
He told me that was unkind, because it was not just, and that I put him upon
contradicting me, which did not consist with good Manners, and therefore since I
had insensibly drawn him into this Poetical scribble, he beg'd I would not
oblige him to break it off, so he writes again,
                         Let Love alone be our Debate.
I wrote again,
                      She loves enough that does not hate.
This he took for a favour, and so laid down the Cudgels, that is to say, the
Pen, I say, he took it for a Favour, and a mighty one it was, if he had known
all: However, he took it as I meant it, that is, to let him think I was inclin'd
to go on with him, as indeed I had Reason to do, for he was the best humour'd
merry sort of a Fellow that I ever met with; and I often reflected how doubly
criminal it was to deceive such a Man; but that Necessity, which press'd me to a
Settlement suitable to my Condition, was my Authority for it, and certainly his
Affection to me, and the Goodness of his Temper, however they might argue
against using him ill, yet they strongly argued to me, that he would better take
the Disappointment, than some fiery temper'd Wretch, who might have nothing to
recommend him but those Passions which would serve only to make a Woman
miserable.
    Besides, though I had jested with him (as he suppose'd it) so often about my
Poverty, yet when he found it to be true, he had fore closed all manner of
Objection, seeing, whether he was in jest or in earnest, he had declare'd he took
me without any Regard to my Portion, and, whether I was in jest or in earnest, I
had declare'd my self to be very Poor, so that, in a Word, I had him fast both
ways; and tho' he might say afterwards he was cheated, yet he could never say
that I had cheated him.
    He pursued me close after this, and, as I saw there was no need to fear
losing him, I play'd the indifferent Part with him longer than Prudence might
otherwise have dictated to me: But I consider'd how much this Caution and
Indifference would give me the Advantage over him, when I should come to own my
Circumstances to him; and I managed it the more warily, because I found he
infer'd from thence, that I had either the more Money, or the more judgement, and
would not venture at all.
    I took the freedom one Day to tell him, that it was true I had receive'd the
Compliment of a Lover from him, namely, that he would take me without enquiring
into my Fortune, and I would make him a suitable Return in this, viz. that I
would make as little enquiry into his as consisted with Reason, but I hoped he
would allow me to ask some Questions, which he should answer or not as he
thought fit; one of these Questions related to our manner of Living, and the
Place where, because I had heard he had a great Plantation in Virginia, and I
told him I did not care to be Transported.
    He began from this Discourse to let me Voluntarily into all his Affairs, and
to tell me in a frank open way, all his Circumstances, by which I found he was
very well to pass in the World; but that great part of his Estate consisted of
three Plantations, which he had in Virginia, which brought him in a very good
Income of about 300l. a year; but that if he was to live upon them, would bring
him in four times as much; very well, thought I, you shall carry me thither then
as soon as you please, tho' I won't tell you so before hand.
    I jested with him about the Figure he would make in Virginia; but found he
would do any thing I desired, so I turn'd my Tale; I told him I had good Reason
not to desire to go there to live, because if his Plantations were worth so much
there, I had not a Fortune suitable to a Gentleman of 1200l. a Year, as he said
his Estate would be.
    He reply'd he did not ask what my Fortune was, he had told me from the
beginning he would not, and he would be as good as his Word; but whatever it
was, he assured me he would never desire me to go to Virginia with him, or go
thither himself without me, unless I made it my Choice.
    All this, you may be sure, was as I wish'd, and indeed nothing could have
happen'd more perfectly agreeable; I carried it on as far as this with a sort of
Indifferency, that he often wonder'd at, and I mention it the rather to intimate
again to the Ladies that nothing but want of Courage for such an Indifferency
makes our Sex so cheap, and prepares them to be ill us'd as they are; would they
venture the Loss of a pretending Fop now and then, who carries it high upon the
point of his own Merit, they would certainly be slighted less, and courted more;
had I discovered really what my great Fortune was, and that in all I had not
full 500l. when he expected 1500., yet I hook'd him so fast, and play'd him so
long, that I was satisfied he would have had me in my worst Circumstances; and
indeed it was less a Surprise to him when he learnt the Truth, than it would
have been, because having not the least Blame to lay on me, who had carried it
with an Air of Indifference to the last, he could not say one Word, except that
indeed he thought it had been more, but that, if it had been less, he did not
repent his Bargain; only that he should not be able to maintain me so well as he
intended.
    In short, we were married, and very happily married on my side, I assure
you, as to the Man; for he was the best humour'd Man that ever Woman had, but
his Circumstances were not so good as I imagined, as on the other hand he had
not better'd himself so much as he expected.
    When we were married, I was shrewdly put to it to bring him that little
Stock I had, and to let him see it was no more; but there was a Necessity for
it, so I took my Opportunity one Day when we were alone, to enter in to a short
Dialogue with him about it. My Dear, said I, we have been married a Fortnight,
is it not time to let you know whether you have got a Wife with something or
with nothing? Your own time for that, my Dear, says he; I am satisfied I have
got the Wife I love; I have not troubled you much, says he, with my Enquiry
after it.
    That's true, said I, but I have a great Difficulty about it, which I scarce
know how to manage. What's that my Dear? says he. Why, says I, 'tis a little
hard upon me, and 'tis harder upon you; I am told that Captain - (meaning my
Friend's Husband), has told you I had a great deal more than ever I pretended to
have, and I am sure I never employ'd him so to do.
    Well, says he, Captain - may have told me so, but what then, if you have not
so much, that may lye at his Door, but you never told me what you had, so I have
no Reason to blame you if you have nothing at all.
    That is so just, said I, and so generous, that it makes my having but a
little a double Affliction to me.
    The less you have my Dear, says he, the worse for us both; but I hope your
Affliction is not caus'd for fear I should be unkind to you, for want of a
Portion; No, no, if you have nothing tell me plainly, I may perhaps tell the
Captain he has cheated me, but I can never say you have, for did not you give it
under your Hand that you was Poor, and so I ought to expect you to be.
    Well, said I, my Dear, I am glad I have not been concern'd in deceiving you
before Marriage, if I deceive you since, 'tis ne'er the worse; that I am Poor,
'tis too true, but not so Poor as to have nothing neither; so I pull'd out some
Bank Bills, and gave him about a Hundred and Sixty Pounds; there is something my
Dear, says I, and not quite all neither.
    I had brought him so near to expecting nothing, by what I had said before,
that the Money, tho' the Sum was small in it self, was doubly welcome; he own'd
it was more than he look'd for, and that he did not question by my Discourse to
him, but that my fine clothes, Gold Watch, and a Diamond Ring or two, had been
all my Fortune.
    I let him please himself with that 160l. two or three Days, and then having
been abroad that Day, and as if I had been to fetch it, I brought him a Hundred
Pounds more home in Gold, and told him there was a little more Portion for him;
and in Short, in about a Week more, I brought him 180l. more, and about 60l. in
Linnen, which I made him believe I had been obliged to take with the 100l. which
I gave him in Gold, as a Composition for a Debt of 600l., being little more than
five Shillings in the Pound, and over-valued too.
    And now, my Dear, says I to him, I am very sorry to tell you, that I have
given you my whole Fortune; I added, that if the Person who had my 600l. had not
abus'd me, I had been worth a Thousand Pound to him, but that as it was, I had
been faithful, and reserve'd nothing to my self, but if it had been more he
should have had it.
    He was so obliged by the Manner, and so pleas'd with the Sum, for he had
been in a terrible Fright least it had been nothing at all, that he accepted it
very thankfully: And thus I got over the Fraud of passing for a Fortune without
Money, and cheating a Man into Marrying me on pretence of it; which, by the way,
I take to be one of the most dangerous Steps a Woman can take, and in which she
runs the most hazzards of being ill used afterwards.
    My Husband, to give him his due, was a Man of infinite good Nature, but he
was no Fool; and finding his Income not suited to the manner of Living which he
had intended, if I had brought him what he expected, and being under a
Disappointment in his return of his Plantations in Virginia, he discovered many
times his Inclination of going over to Virginia, to live upon his own; and often
would be magnifying the way of living there, how Cheap, how Plentiful, how
Pleasant, and the like.
    I began presently to understand his meaning, and I took him up very plainly
one Morning, and told him that I did so; that I found his Estate turn'd to no
Account at this Distance, compar'd to what it would do if he liv'd upon the
Spot, and that I found he had a mind to go and live there; that I was sensible
he had been disappointed in a Wife, and that finding his Expectations not
answer'd that way, I could do no less, to make him amends, than tell him, that I
was very willing to go to Virginia with him and live there.
    He said a Thousand kind things to me upon the Subject of my making such a
Proposal to him: He told me that tho' he was disappointed in his Expectations of
a Fortune, he was not disappointed in a Wife, and that I was all to him that a
Wife could be, but that this Offer was so kind, that it was more than he could
express.
    To bring the Story short, we agreed to go; he told me, that he had a very
good House there well furnish'd, that his Mother liv'd in it, and one Sister,
which was all the Relations he had; that as soon as he came there, they would
remove to another House which was her own for Life, and his after her Decease;
so that I should have all the House to my self; and I found it all exactly as he
said.
    We put on board the Ship, which we went in, a large quantity of good
Furniture for our House, with Stores of Linnen and other Necessaries, and a good
Cargoe for Sale, and away we went.
    To give an Account of the manner of our Voyage, which was long and full of
Dangers, is out of my way, I kept no Journal, neither did my Husband; all that I
can say is, that after a terrible Passage, frighted twice with dreadful Storms,
and once with what was still more terrible, I mean a Pyrate, who came on board
and took away almost all our Provisions; and, which would have been beyond all
to me, they had once taken my Husband, but by Intreaties were prevail'd with to
leave him: I say, after all these terrible Things, we arrive'd in York River in
Virginia, and coming to our Plantation, we were received with all the Tenderness
and Affection (by my Husband's Mother) that could be express'd.
    We liv'd here all together, my Mother-in-law, at my Entreaty, continuing in
the House, for she was too kind a Mother to be parted with; my Husband likewise
continued the same at first, and I thought my self the happiest Creature alive;
when an odd and surprising Event put an end to all that Felicity in a Moment,
and rendred my Condition the most uncomfortable in the World.
    My Mother was a mighty cheerful good humour'd old Woman, I may call her so,
for her Son was above Thirty; I say, she was very pleasant good Company, and
us'd to entertain me in Particular, with abundance of Stories to divert me, as
well of the Country we were in, as of the People.
    Among the rest, she often told me how the greatest part of the Inhabitants
of that Colony came thither in very indifferent Circumstances from England;
that, generally speaking, they were of two Sorts; either (1.) such as were
brought over by Masters of Ships to be sold as Servants; or, (2.) such as are
Transported after having been found guilty of Crimes punishable with Death.
    When they come here, says she, we make no difference, the Planters buy them,
and they work together in the Field till their time is out; when 'tis expir'd,
said she, they have Encouragement given them to Plant for themselves; for they
have a certain Number of Acres of Land allotted them by the Country, and they go
to work to clear and cure the Land, and then to Plant it with Tobacco and Corn
for their own Use; and as the Merchants will trust them with Tools, and
Necessaries, upon the Credit of their Crop before it is grown, so they again
Plant every Year a little more than the Year before, and so buy whatever they
want with the Crop that is before them. Hence Child, says she, many a
Newgate-Bird becomes a great Man, and we have, continued she, several Justices
of the Peace, Officers of the train'd Bands, and Magistrates of the Towns they
live in, that have been burnt in the Hand.
    She was going on with that part of the Story, when her own part in it
interrupted her, and with a great deal of good humour'd Confidence she told me,
she was one of the second sort of Inhabitants herself; that she came away
openly, having venture'd too far in a Particular Case, so that she was become a
Criminal, and here's the Mark of it Child, says she, and showed me a very fine
white Arm and Hand, but branded in the in-side of the Hand, as in such Cases it
must be.
    This Story was very moving to me, but my Mother (smiling) said, you need not
think such a thing strange, Daughter, for some of the best Men in the Country
are burnt in the Hand, and they are not asham'd to own it; there's Major-, says
she, he was an Eminent Pick pocket; there's Justice Ba-r, was a Shoplifter, and
both of them were burnt in the Hand, and I could name you several such as they
are.
    We had frequent Discourses of this kind, and abundance of Instances she gave
me of the like; after some time as she was telling some Stories of one that was
Transported but a few Weeks ago, I began in an intimate kind of way, to ask her
to tell me something of her own Story, which she did with the utmost Plainness
and Sincerity; how she had fallen into very ill Company in London in her young
Days, occasion'd by her Mother sending her frequently to carry Victuals to a
Kinswoman of hers who was a Prisoner in Newgate, in a miserable starving
Condition, who was afterwards Condemn'd to dye, but having got Respite by
pleading her Belly, perish'd afterwards in the Prison.
    Here my Mother-in-Law ran out in a long account of the wicked Practices in
that dreadful Place, and child, says my Mother, perhaps you may know little of
it, or it may be have heard nothing about it; but depend upon it, says she, we
all know here, that there are more Thieves and Rogues made by that one Prison of
Newgate, than by all the Clubs and Societies of Villains in the Nation; 'tis
that cursed Place, says my Mother, that half Peoples this Colony.
    Here she went on with her own Story so long, and in so Particular a Manner,
that I began to be very uneasy, but coming to one Particular that require'd
telling her Name, I thought I should have sunk down in the Place; she perceive'd
I was out of order, and ask'd me if I was not well, and what ail'd me? I told
her I was so affected with the melancholy Story she had told, that it had
overcome me, and I beg'd of her to talk no more of it: Why my Dear, says she
very kindly, what need these things trouble you? These Passages were long before
your time, and they give me no Trouble at all now, nay, I look back on them with
a Particular Satisfaction, as they have been a Means to bring me to this Place.
Then she went on to tell me how she fell into a good Family, where behaving
herself well, and her Mistress dying, her Master married her, by whom she had my
Husband and his Sister, and that by her Diligence and good Management after her
Husband's Death, she had improved the Plantations to such a degree as they then
were, so that most of the Estate was of her getting, not of her Husband's, for
she had been a Widow upwards of Sixteen Years.
    I heard this part of the Story with very little Attention, because I wanted
much to retire and give vent to my Passions, and let any one judge what must be
the Anguish of my Mind, when I came to reflect, that this was certainly no more
or less than my own Mother, and that I had now had two Children, and was big
with another by my own Brother, and lay with him still every Night.
    I was now the most unhappy of all Women in the World: O! had the Story never
been told me, all had been well; it had been no Crime to have lain with my
Husband, if I had known nothing of it.
    I had now such a Load on my Mind that it kept me perpetually waking; to
reveal it I could not find would be to any Purpose, and yet to conceal it would
be next to impossible; nay, I did not doubt but I should talk in my Sleep, and
tell my Husband of it whether I would or no: If I discover'd it, the least thing
I could expect was to lose my Husband, for he was too nice and too honest a Man
to have continue'd my Husband after he had known I had been his Sister, so that I
was perplex'd to the last Degree.
    I leave it to any Man to judge what Difficulties presented to my View, I was
away from my Native Country at a Distance prodigious, and the return to me
unpassable; I liv'd very well, but in a Circumstance unsufferable in itself; if
I had discover'd my self to my Mother, it might be difficult to convince her of
the Particulars, and I had no way to prove them: On the other hand, if she had
questioned or doubted me, I had been undone, for the bare Suggestion would have
immediately separated me from my Husband, without gaining my Mother or him, so
that between the Surprise on one hand, and the Uncertainty on the other, I had
been sure to be undone.
    In the mean time, as I was but too sure of the Fact, I liv'd therefore in
open avowed Incest and Whoredom, and all under the appearance of an honest Wife;
and tho' I was not much touched with the Crime of it, yet the Action had
something in it shocking to Nature, and made my Husband even nauseous to me.
However, upon the most sedate Consideration, I resolve'd, that it was absolutely
necessary to conceal it all, and not make the least Discovery of it either to
Mother or Husband; and thus I liv'd with the greatest Pressure imaginable for
three Years more.
    During this time my Mother used to be frequently telling me old Stories of
her former Adventures, which however were no ways pleasant to me; for by it,
tho' she did not tell it me in plain Terms, yet I could understand, joyn'd with
what I heard my self, of my first Tutors, that in her younger Days she had been
Whore and Thief; but I verily believe she had liv'd to repent sincerely of both,
and that she was then a very Pious, Sober, and Religious Woman.
    Well, let her Life have been what it would then, it was certain that my Life
was very uneasy to me; for I liv'd, as I have said, but in the worst sort of
Whoredom, and as I could expect no good of it, so really no good Issue came of
it, and all my seeming Prosperity wore off and ended in Misery and Destruction.
It was some time indeed before it came to this, for every thing went wrong with
us afterwards, and that which was worse, my Husband grew strangely alter'd,
froward, jealous, and unkind, and I was as impatient of bearing his Carriage, as
the Carriage was unreasonable and unjust: These things proceeded so far, and we
came at last to be in such ill Terms with one another that I claim'd a Promise
of him which he enter'd willingly into with me, when I consented to come from
England with him, viz. that if I did not like to live there, I should come away
to England again when I pleas'd, giving him a Year's warning to settle his
Affairs.
    I say, I now claim'd this Promise of him, and I must confess I did it not in
the most obliging Terms that could be neither; but I insisted that he treated me
ill, that I was remote from my Friends, and could do my self no Justice, and
that he was Jealous without Cause, my Conversation having been unblameable, and
he having no Pretence for it, and that to remove to England, would take away all
Occasion from him.
    I insisted so peremptorily upon it, that he could not avoid coming to a
Point, either to keep his Word with me, or to break it; and this,
notwithstanding he used all the Skill he was Master of, and employ'd his Mother
and other Agents to prevail with me to alter my Resolutions; indeed the bottom
of the thing lay at my Heart, and that made all his Endeavours fruitless, for my
Heart was alienated from him. I loathed the Thoughts of Bedding with him, and
used a Thousand Pretences of Illness and Humour to prevent his touching me,
fearing nothing more than to be with Child again, which to be sure would have
prevented, or at least delay'd my going over to England.
    However, at last I put him so out of Humour that he took up a rash and fatal
Resolution, that in short I should not go to England; that tho' he had promise'd
me, yet it was an unreasonable thing, that it would be ruinous to his Affairs,
would unhinge his whole Family, and be next to an Undoing him in the World; that
therefore I ought not to desire it of him, and that no Wife in the World that
valued her Family and her Husband's Prosperity, would insist upon such a thing.
    This plung'd me again, for when I considered the thing calmly, and took my
Husband as he really was, a diligent careful Man, in the main, and that he knew
nothing of the dreadful Circumstances that he was in, I could not but confess to
my self that my Proposal was very unreasonable, and what no Wife that had the
good of her Family at Heart wou'd have desire'd.
    But my Discontents were of another Nature; I look'd upon him no longer as a
Husband, but as a near Relation, the Son of my own Mother, and I resolve'd some
how or other to be clear of him, but which way I did not know.
    It is said by the ill-natur'd World, of our Sex, that if we are set on a
thing, it is impossible to turn us from our Resolutions: In short, I never
ceas'd poring upon the Means to bring to pass my Voyage, and came that length
with my Husband at last, as to propose going without him: This provok'd him to
the last degree, and he call'd me not only an unkind Wife, but an unnatural
Mother, and ask'd me how I could entertain such a Thought without Horror, as
that of leaving my two Children (for one was dead) without a Mother, and never
to see them more. It was true, had things been right, I should not have done it,
but now, it was my real desire never to see them, or him either any more; and as
to the Charge of unnatural, I could easily answer it to my self, while I knew
that the whole Relation was unnatural in the highest degree.
    However, there was no bringing my Husband to any thing; he would neither go
with me, or let me go without him, and it was out of my Power to stir without
his Consent, as any one that is acquainted with the Constitution of that Country
knows very well.
    We had many Family Quarrels about it, and they began to grow up to a
dangerous Height; for as I was quite estrang'd from him in Affection, so I took
no heed to my Words, but sometimes gave him Language that was provoking: In
short, I strove all I could to bring him to a parting with me, which was what
above all things I desire'd most.
    He took my Carriage very ill, and indeed he might well do so, for at last I
refuse'd to Bed with him, and carrying on the Breach upon all occasions to
extremity, he told me once he thought I was Mad, and if I did not alter my
Conduct, he would put me under Cure; that is to say, into a Mad-house: I told
him he should find I was far enough from Mad, and that it was not in his power,
or any other Villains, to Murther me; I confess at the same time I was heartily
frighted at his Thoughts of putting me into Mad-house, which would at once have
destroy'd all the possibility of bringing the Truth out; for that then, no one
would have given Credit to a word of it.
    This therefore brought me to a Resolution, whatever came of it, to lay open
my whole Case; but which way to do it, or to whom, was an inextricable
Difficulty; when another Quarrel with my Husband happen'd, which came up to such
an Extream as almost push'd me on to tell it him all to his Face; but tho' I
kept it in so as not to come to the particulars, I spoke so much as put him into
the utmost Confusion, and in the End brought out the whole Story.
    He began with a calm Expostulation upon my being so resolute to go to
England; I defended it, and one hard Word bringing on another, as is usual in
all Family Strife, he told me, I did not treat him as if he was my Husband, or
talk of my Children, as if I was a Mother; and in short, that I did not deserve
to be us'd as a Wife: That he had us'd all the fair Means possible with me; that
he had argu'd with all the kindness and calmness, that a Husband or a Christian
ought to do, and that I made him such a vile return, that I treated him rather
like a Dog than a Man, and rather like the most contemptible Stranger than a
Husband: That he was very loth to use Violence with me, but that, in short, he
saw a Necessity of it now, and that for the future he should be oblige'd to take
such Measures as should reduce me to my Duty.
    My Blood was now fir'd to the utmost, and nothing could appear more
provok'd; I told him, for his fair means and his foul they were equally
contemn'd by me; that for my going to England, I was resolve'd on it, come what
would; and that as to treating him not like a Husband, and not showing my self a
Mother to my Children, there might be something more in it than he understood at
present; but I thought fit to tell him thus much, that he neither was my lawful
Husband, nor they lawful Children, and that I had reason to regard neither of
them more than I did.
    I Confess I was mov'd to pity him when I spoke it, for he turn'd pale as
Death, and stood mute as one Thunder-struck, and once or twice I thought he
would have fainted; in short, it put him in a Fit something like an Apoplex; he
trembl'd, a Sweat or Dew ran off his Face, and yet he was cold as a Clod, so
that I was forced to fetch something to keep Life in him; when he recover'd of
that, he grew sick and vomited, and in a little after was put to Bed, and the
next Morning was in a violent Fever.
    However, it went off again, and he recovered, tho' but slowly, and when he
came to be a little better, he told me, I had given him a mortal Wound with my
Tongue, and he had only one thing to ask before he desire'd an Explanation; I
interrupted him, and told him I was sorry I had gone so far, since I saw what
disorder it put him into, but I desire'd him not to talk to me of Explanations,
for that would but make things worse.
    This heighten'd his Impatience, and indeed perplex'd him beyond all bearing;
for now he began to suspect that there was some Mystery yet unfolded, but could
not make the least guess at it; all that run in his Brain was, that I had
another Husband alive, but I assure'd him, there was not the least of that in it;
indeed as to my other Husband he was effectually dead to me, and had told me I
should look on him as such, so I had not the least uneasiness on that score.
    But now I found the thing too far gone to conceal it much longer, and my
Husband himself gave me an Opportunity to ease my self of the Secret much to my
Satisfaction; he had laboured with me three or four Weeks, but to no purpose,
only to tell him, whether I had spoken those Words only to put him in a Passion,
or whether there was any thing of Truth in the bottom of them: But I continued
inflexible, and would explain nothing, unless he would first consent to my going
to England, which he would never do, he said, while he liv'd; on the other hand,
I said it was in my power to make him willing when I pleas'd, NAY to make him
entreat me to go; and this increas'd his Curiosity, and made him importunate to
the highest Degree.
    At length he tells all this Story to his Mother, and sets her upon me to get
it out of me, and she us'd her utmost Skill indeed; but I put her to a full stop
at once, by telling her that the Mystery of the whole Matter lay in herself;
that it was my Respect to her had made me conceal it, and that, in short, I
could go no farther, and therefore conjur'd her not to insist upon it.
    She was struck dumb at this Suggestion, and could not tell what to say or to
think; but laying aside the Supposition as a Policy of mine, continued her
Importunity on account of her Son, and if possible, to make up the Breach
between us two; as to that, I told her, that it was indeed a good Design in her,
but that it was impossible to be done; and that if I should reveal to her the
Truth of what she desire'd, she would grant it to be impossible, and cease to
desire it: At last I seem'd to be prevail'd on by her Importunity, and told her
I dare trust her with a Secret of the greatest Importance, and she would soon
see that this was so, and that I would consent to lodge it in her Breast, if she
would engage solemnly not to acquaint her Son with it without my Consent.
    She was long in promising this Part, but rather than not come at the main
Secret she agreed to that too, and after a great many other Preliminaries, I
began and told her the whole Story: First I told her how much she was concern'd
in all the unhappy Breach which had happen'd between her Son and me, by telling
me her own Story, and her London Name; and that the Surprise she see I was in,
was upon that Occasion: Then I told her my own Story, and my Name, and assure'd
her by such other Tokens, as she could not deny, that I was no other, nor more
or less than her own Child, her Daughter born of her Body in Newgate; the same
that had save'd her from the Gallows by being in her Belly, and that she left in
such and such Hands when she was Transported.
    It is impossible to express the Astonishment she was in; she was not
inclin'd to believe the Story, or to remember the Particulars; for she
immediately foresaw the Confusion that must follow in the Family upon it; but
every thing concurr'd so exactly with the Stories she had told me of herself,
and which, if she had not told me, she would perhaps have been content to have
denied, that she had stop'd her own Mouth, and she had nothing to do but take me
about the Neck and kiss me, and cry most vehemently over me, without speaking
one word for a long time together; at last she broke out, Unhappy Child! says
she, What miserable Chance could bring thee hither? and in the Arms of my Son
too! Dreadful girl! says she, why we are all undone! Married to thy own Brother!
Three Children, and two alive, all of the same Flesh and Blood! My Son and my
Daughter lying together as Husband and Wife! All Confusion and Distraction,
miserable Family! What will become of us? What is to be said? What is to be
done? And thus she run on a great while, nor had I any Power to speak, or if I
had, did I know what to say, for every Word wounded me to the Soul: With this
kind of Amazement we parted for the first time, tho' my Mother was more
Surprise'd than I was, because it was more News to her than to me: However, she
promise'd again, that she would say nothing of it to her Son, till we had talk'd
of it again.
    It was not long, you may be sure, before we had a second Conference upon the
same Subject; when, as if she had been willing to forget the Story she had told
me of herself, or to suppose that I had forgot some of the Particulars, she
began to tell them with Alterations and Omissions; but I refresh'd her Memory,
in many things which I supposed she had forgot, and then came in so opportunely
with the whole History, that it was impossible for her to go from it; and then
she fell into her Rhapsodies again, and Exclamations at the Severity of her
Misfortunes: When these things were a little over with her, we fell into a close
Debate about what should be first done before we gave an account of the matter
to my Husband. But to what purpose could be all our Consultations? we could
neither of us see our way thro it, or how it could be safe to open such a Scene
to him; it was impossible to make any judgment, or give any guess at what Temper
he would receive it in, or what Measures he would take upon it; and if he should
have so little Government of himself, as to make it public, we easily foresaw
that it would be the ruin of the whole Family, and if at last he should take the
Advantage the Law would give him, he might put me away with Disdain, and leave
me to sue for the little Portion that I had, and perhaps waste it all in the
Suit, and then be a Beggar; and thus I should see him perhaps in the Arms of
another Wife in a few Months, and be my self the most miserable Creature alive.
    My Mother was as sensible of this as I; and upon the whole, we knew not what
to do; after some time, we came to more sober Resolutions, but then it was with
this Misfortune too, that my Mother's Opinion and mine were quite different from
one another, and indeed inconsistent with one another; for my Mother's Opinion
was, that I should bury the whole thing entirely, and continue to live with him
as my Husband, till some other Event should make the Discovery of it more
convenient; and that in the mean time she would endeavour to reconcile us
together again, and restore our mutual Comfort and Family Peace; that we might
lie as we us'd to do together, and so let the whole matter remain a Secret as
close as Death; for Child, says she, we are both undone if it comes out.
    To encourage me to this, she promise'd to make me easy in my Circumstances,
and to leave me what she could at her Death, secure'd for me separately from my
Husband; so that if it should come out afterwards, I should be able to stand on
my own Feet, and procure Justice too from him.
    This Proposal did not agree with my judgement, tho' it was very fair and kind
in my Mother, but my Thoughts run quite another way.
    As to keeping the thing in our own Breasts, and letting it all remain as it
was, I told her it was impossible; and I ask'd her how she could think I could
bear the Thoughts of lying with my own Brother? In the next place I told her,
that her being alive was the only support of the Discovery, and that while she
own'd me for her Child, and saw reason to be satisfied that I was so, no body
else would doubt it; but that if she should die before the Discovery, I should
be taken for an impudent Creature that had forg'd such a thing to go away from
my Husband, or should be counted Craz'd and Distracted: Then I told her how he
had threaten'd already to put me into a Mad-house, and what Concern I had been
in about it, and how that was the thing that drove me to the Necessity of
discovering it to her as I had done.
    From all which I told her, that I had, on the most serious Reflections I was
able to make in the Case, come to this Resolution, which I hop'd she would like,
as a Medium between both, viz. That she should use her endeavours with her Son
to give me leave to go for England, as I had desired, and to furnish me with a
sufficient Sum of Money, either in Goods along with me, or in Bills for my
Support there, all along suggesting, that he might one time or other think it
proper to come over to me.
    That when I was gone she should then in cold Blood, discover the Case to him
gradually, and as her own Discretion should guide; so that he might not be
Surprise'd with it, and fly out into any Passions and Excesses; and that she
should concern herself to prevent his slighting the Children, or marrying again,
unless he had a certain account of my being Dead.
    This was my Scheme, and my Reasons were good; I was really alienated from
him in the Consequence of these Things; indeed I mortally hated him as a
Husband, and it was impossible to remove that riveted Aversion I had to him; at
the same time, it being an unlawful incestuous Living, added to that Aversion,
and every thing added to make Cohabiting with him the most nauseous thing to me
in the World; and I think verily it was come to such a height, that I could
almost as willingly have embrace'd a Dog, as have let him offer any thing of that
kind to me, for which Reason I could not bear the Thoughts of coming between the
Sheets with him; I cannot say that I was right in carrying it such a length,
while at the same time I did not resolve to discover the thing to him; but I am
giving an account of what was, not of what ought or ought not to be.
    In this directly opposite Opinion to one another my Mother and I continued a
long time, and it was impossible to reconcile our Judgments; many Disputes we
had about it, but we could never either of us yield our own, or bring over the
other.
    I insisted on my Aversion to lying with my own Brother; and she insisted
upon its being impossible to bring him to consent to my going to England; and in
this uncertainty we continued, not differing so as to quarrel, or any thing like
it; but so as not to be able to resolve what we should do to make up that
terrible Breach.
    At last I resolve'd on a desperate Course, and told my Mother my Resolution,
viz. That in short, I wou'd tell him of it my self; my Mother was frighted to
the last degree at the very Thoughts of it; but I bid her be easy, told her I
would do it gradually and softly, and with all the Art and good Humour I was
Mistress of, and time it also as well as I could, taking him in good Humour too:
I told her, I did not question but if I cou'd be Hypocrite enough to feign more
Affection to him than I really had, I should succeed in all my Design, and we
might part by Consent, and with a good Agreement, for I might love him well
enough for a Brother tho' I could not for a Husband.
    All this while he lay at my Mother to find out, if possible, what was the
meaning of that dreadful Expression of mine, as he call'd it, which I mention'd
before; namely, That I was not his lawful Wife, nor my Children his legal
Children: my Mother put him off, told him she could bring me to no Explanations,
but found there was something that disturb'd me very much, and she hop'd she
should get it out of me in time, and in the mean time recommended to him
earnestly to use me more tenderly, and win me with his usual good Carriage; told
him of his terrifying and affrighting me with his Threats of sending me to a
Mad-house and the like, and advis'd him not to make a Woman Desperate on any
account whatever.
    He promise'd her to soften his Behaviour, and bid her assure me that he love'd
me as well as ever, and that he had no such design as that of sending me to a
Mad-house, whatever he might say in his Passion; also he desire'd my Mother to
use the same Perswasions to me too, and we might live together as we us'd to do.
    I found the Effects of this Treaty presently; my Husband's Conduct was
immediately alter'd, and he was quite another Man to me; nothing could be kinder
and more obliging than he was to me upon all Occasions; and I could do no less
than make some return to it, which I did as well as I could, but it was but in
an awkward manner at best, for nothing was more frightful to me than his
Caresses, and the Apprehensions of being with Child again by him, was ready to
throw me into Fits; and this made me see that there was an absolute necessity of
breaking the Case to him without any more delay, which however I did with all
the Caution and Reserve imaginable.
    He had continued his alter'd Carriage to me near a Month, and we began to
live a new kind of Life with one another; and could I have satisfied my self to
have gone on with it, I believe it might have continued as long as we had
continue'd alive together. One Evening as we were sitting and talking together
under a little Awning, which serve'd as an Arbour at the Entrance into the
Garden, he was in a very pleasant agreeable Humour, and said abundance of kind
things to me, relating to the Pleasure of our present good Agreement, and the
Disorders of our past Breach, and what a Satisfaction it was to him, that we had
room to hope we should never have any more of it.
    I fetch'd a deep Sigh, and told him there was no Body in the World could be
more delighted than I was, in the good Agreement we had always kept up, or more
afflicted with the Breach of it, but I was sorry to tell him that there was an
unhappy Circumstance in our Case, which lay too close to my Heart, and which I
knew not how to break to him, that rendred my part of it very miserable, and
took from me all the Comfort of the rest.
    He importun'd me to tell him what it was; I told him I could not tell how to
do it, that while it was conceal'd from him, I alone was unhappy, but if he knew
it also, we should be both so; and that therefore to keep him in the dark about
it was the kindest thing that I could do, and it was on that account alone that
I kept a Secret from him, the very keeping of which I thought would first or
last be my Destruction.
    It is impossible to express his Surprise at this Relation, and the double
importunity which he used with me to discover it to him: He told me I could not
be call'd kind to him, nay, I could not be faithful to him, if I conceal'd it
from him; I told him I thought so too, and yet I could not do it. He went back
to what I had said before to him, and told me he hoped it did not relate to what
I said in my Passion; and that he had resolve'd to forget all that, as the Effect
of a rash provok'd Spirit; I told him I wish'd I could forget it all too, but
that it was not to be done, the Impression was too deep, and it was impossible.
    He then told me he was resolve'd not to differ with me in any thing, and that
therefore he would importune me no more about it, resolving to acquiesce in
whatever I did or said; only begg'd I would then agree, that whatever it was, it
should no more interrupt our Quiet and our mutual Kindness.
    This was the most provoking thing he could have said to me, for I really
wanted his farther importunities, that I might be prevail'd with to bring out
that which indeed was like Death to me to conceal; so I answer'd him plainly,
that I could not say I was glad not to be importuned, tho' I could not tell how
to comply; but come, my Dear, said I, what Conditions will you make with me upon
the opening this Affair to you?
    Any Conditions in the World, said he, that you can in reason desire of me;
well, said I, come, give it me under your Hand, that if you do not find I am in
any Fault, or that I am willingly concern'd in the Causes of the Misfortunes
that is to follow, you will not blame me, use me the worse, do me any Injury, or
make me be the Sufferer for that which is not my fault.
    That, says he, is the most reasonable Demand in the World; not to blame you
for that which is not your fault; give me a Pen and Ink, says he, so I ran in
and fetch'd Pen, Ink, and Paper, and he wrote the Condition down in the very
Words I had proposed it, and sign'd it with his Name; well, says he, what is
next, my Dear? Why, says I, the next is, that you will not blame me for not
discovering the Secret to you before I knew it. Very just again, says he, with
all my Heart; so he wrote down that also and sign'd it.
    Well, my Dear, says I, then I have but one Condition more to make with you,
and that is, that as there is no body concern'd in it but you and I, you shall
not discover it to any Person in the World, except your own Mother; and that in
all the Measures you shall take upon the Discovery, as I am equally concern'd in
it with you, tho' as Innocent as your self, you shall do nothing in a Passion,
nothing to my Prejudice, or to your Mother's Prejudice, without my Knowledge and
Consent.
    This a little amaz'd him, and he wrote down the Words distinctly, but read
them over and over before he sign'd them, hesitating at them several times, and
repeating them; my Mother's Prejudice! and your Prejudice! What mysterious thing
can this be? however, at last he sign'd it.
    Well, says I, my Dear, I'll ask you no more under your Hand, but as you are
to hear the most unexpected and surprising thing that perhaps ever befell any
Family in the World, I beg you to promise me you will receive it with Composure
and a Presence of Mind suitable to a Man of Sense.
    I'll do my utmost, says he, upon Condition you will keep me no longer in
suspense, for you terrify me with all these Preliminaries.
    Well then, says I, it is this, as I told you before in a Heat, that I was
not your lawful Wife, and that our Children were not legal Children, so I must
let you know now in calmness, and in kindness, but with Affliction enough, that
I am your own Sister, and you my own Brother, and that we are both the Children
of our Mother now alive, and in the House, who is convince'd of the Truth of it,
in a manner not to be denied or contradicted.
    I saw him turn pale, and look wild, and I said, now remember your Promise,
and receive it with Presence of Mind; for who cou'd have said more to prepare
you for it, than I have done? However, I call'd a Servant, and got him a little
Glass of Rum, which is the usual Dram of the Country, for he was fainting away.
    When he was a little recover'd, I said to him, this Story you may be sure
requires a long Explanation, and therefore have Patience and compose your Mind
to hear it out, and I'll make it as short as I can, and with this, I told him
what I thought was needful of the Fact, and particularly how my Mother came to
discover it to me, as above; and now, my Dear, says I, you will see Reason for
my Capitulations, and that I neither have been the Cause of this Matter, nor
could be so, and that I could know nothing of it before now.
    I am fully satisfied of that, says he, but 'tis a dreadful Surprise to me;
however, I know a Remedy for it all, and a Remedy that shall put an End to all
your Difficulties, without your going to England. That would be strange, said I,
as all the rest; No, no, says he, I'll make it easy, there's no Body in the way
of it all, but my self: He look'd a little disorder'd, when he said this, but I
did not apprehend any thing from it at that time, believing, as it us'd to be
said, that they who do those things never talk of them; or that they who talk of
such things never do them.
    But things were not come to their height with him, and I observe'd he became
Pensive and Melancholly; and in a Word, as I thought a little Distemper'd in his
Head: I endeavour'd to talk him into Temper, and into a kind of Scheme for our
Government in the Affair, and sometimes he would be well, and talk with some
Courage about it; but the Weight of it lay too heavy upon his Thoughts, and went
so far that he made two Attempts upon himself, and in one of them had actually
strangled himself, and had not his Mother come into the Room in the very Moment,
he had died; but with the help of a Negro Servant, she cut him down and
recover'd him.
    Things were now come to a lamentable height: My pity for him now began to
revive that Affection, which at first I really had for him, and I endeavour'd
sincerely, by all the kind Carriage I could, to make up the Breach; but in
short, it had gotten too great a Head, it prey'd upon his Spirits, and it threw
him into a ling'ring Consumption, tho' it happen'd not to be Mortal. In this
Distress I did not know what to do, as his Life was apparently declining, and I
might perhaps have Marry'd again there, very much to my Advantage, had it been
my Business to have staid in the Country; but my Mind was restless too, I
hanker'd after coming to England, and nothing would satisfy me without it.
    In short, by an unwearied importunity, my Husband, who was apparently
decaying, as I observe'd, was at last prevail'd with, and so my Fate pushing me
on, the way was made clear for me, and my Mother concurring, I obtain'd a very
good Cargo for my coming to England.
    When I parted with my Brother, for such I am now to call him; we agreed that
after I arrive'd, he should pretend to have an Account that I was dead in England
, and so might Marry again when he wou'd; he promise'd, and engage'd to me, to
Correspond with me as a Sister, and to Assist and Support me as long as I liv'd;
and that if he dy'd before me, he would leave sufficient to his Mother to take
Care of me still, in the Name of a Sister, and he was in some respects just to
this; but it was so oddly manage'd that I felt the Disappointments very sensibly
afterwards, as you shall hear in its time.
    I came away in the Month of August, after I had been Eight Years in that
Country, and now a new Scene of Misfortunes attended me, which perhaps few Women
have gone thro' the like.
    We had an indifferent good Voyage, till we came just upon the Coast of
England, and where we arrive'd in two and thirty Days, but were then ruffled with
two or three Storms, one of which drove us away to the Coast of Ireland, and we
put in at Kinsale: We remain'd there about thirteen Days, got some Refreshment
on Shore, and put to Sea again, tho' we met with very bad Weather again, in
which the Ship sprung her Main-mast, as they call'd it: But we got at last into
Milford Haven in Wales, where, tho' it was remote from our Port, yet having my
Foot safe upon the firm Ground of the Isle of Britain, I resolve'd to venture it
no more upon the Waters, which had been so terrible to me; so getting my clothes
and Money on Shore, with my Bills of Loading and other Papers, I resolve'd to
come for London, and leave the Ship to get to her Port as she could; the Port
whither she was bound, was to Bristol, where my Brother's chief Correspondent
liv'd.
    I got to London in about three Weeks, where I heard a little while after,
that the Ship was arrive'd at Bristol, but at the same time had the Misfortune to
know that by the violent Weather she had been in, and the breaking of her
Main-mast, she had great Damage on Board, and that a great part of her Cargoe
was spoil'd.
    I had now a new Scene of Life upon my Hands, and a dreadful Appearance it
had; I was come away with a kind of final Farewel; what I brought with me, was
indeed considerable, had it come safe, and by the help of it, I might have
married again tollerably well; but as it was, I was reduce'd to between two or
three hundred Pounds in the whole, and this without any hope of Recruit. I was
entirely without Friends, nay, even so much as without Acquaintances, for I
found it was absolutely necessary not to revive former Acquaintance; and as for
my subtle Friend that set me up formerly for a Fortune, she was dead and her
Husband also.
    The looking after my Cargoe of Goods soon after obliged me to take a Journey
to Bristol, and during my Attendance upon that Affair, I took the Diversion of
going to the Bath, for as I was still far from being old, so my Humour, which
was always Gay, continue'd so to an Extream; and being now, as it were, a Woman
of Fortune, tho' I was a Woman without a Fortune, I expected something or other
might happen in the way, that might mend my Circumstances, as had been my Case
before.
    The Bath is a Place of Gallantry enough; Expensive, and full of Snares; I
went thither indeed in the View of taking what might offer; but I must do my
self Justice, as to protest I meant nothing but in an honest way, nor had any
Thoughts about me at first that look'd the way, which afterwards I suffered them
to be guided.
    Here I stay'd the whole latter Season, as it is call'd there, and contracted
some unhappy Acquaintance, which rather prompted the Follies I fell afterwards
into, than fortify'd me against them: I liv'd pleasantly enough, kept good
Company, that is to say, gay fine Company; but had the Discouragement to find
this way of Living sunk me exceedingly, and that as I had no settled Income, so
spending upon the main Stock, was but a certain kind of bleeding to Death; and
this gave me many sad Reflections: However I shook them off, and still flatter'd
my self that something or other might offer for my Advantage.
    But I was in the wrong Place for it; I was not now at Redriff, where if I
had set my self tollerably up, some honest Sea Captain or other might have
talk'd with me upon the honourable Terms of Matrimony; but I was at the Bath,
where Men find a Mistress sometimes, but very rarely look for a Wife; and
Consequently all the Particular Acquaintances a Woman can expect there, must
have some Tendency that way.
    I had spent the first Season well enough, for tho' I had contracted some
Acquaintance with a Gentleman, who came to the Bath for his Diversion, yet I had
enter'd into no felonious Treaty: I had resisted some Casual Offers of
Gallantry, and had manage'd that way well enough; I was not wicked enough to come
into the Crime for the meer Vice of it, and I had no extraordinary Offers that
tempted me with the main thing which I wanted.
    However, I went this length the first Season, (viz.) I contracted an
Acquaintance with a Woman in whose House I lodge'd, who, tho' she did not keep an
ill House, yet had none of the best Principles in her self: I had on all
Occasions behave'd my self so well as not to get the least Slur upon my
Reputation, and all the Men that I had convers'd with, were of so good
Reputation that I had not gotten the least Reflection, by conversing with them;
nor did any of them seem to think there was room for a wicked Correspondence, if
they had offered it; yet there was one Gentleman, as above, who always singled
me out for the Diversion of my Company, as he call'd it, which, as he was
pleased to say, was very agreeable to him, but at that time there was no more in
it.
    I had many Melancholly Hours at the Bath after all the Company was gone, for
tho' I went to Bristol sometimes for the disposing my Effects, and for Recruits
of Money, yet I chose to come back to the Bath for my Residence, because being
on good Terms with the Woman, in whose House I lodge'd in the Summer, I found
that during the Winter I liv'd rather cheaper there than I could do any where
else; here, I say, I pass'd the Winter as heavily as I had pass'd the Autumn
cheerfully; but having contracted a nearer Intimacy with the said Woman, in
whose House I lodge'd, I could not avoid communicating something of what lay
hardest upon my Mind, and particularly the narrowness of my Circumstances: I
told her also, that I had a Mother and a Brother in Virginia in good
Circumstances, and as I had really written back to my Mother in particular to
represent my Condition, and the great Loss I had receive'd, so I did not fail to
let my new Friend know, that I expected a Supply from thence, and so indeed I
did; and as the Ships went from Bristol to York-River, in Virginia, and back
again generally in less time than from London, and that my Brother corresponded
chiefly at Bristol, I thought it was much better for me to wait here for my
Returns, than to go to London.
    My new Friend appear'd sensibly affected with my Condition, and indeed was
so very kind, as to reduce the rate of my living with her to so low a Price
during the Winter, that she convince'd me she got nothing by me; and as for
Lodging, during the Winter, I paid nothing at all.
    When the Spring Season came on, she continue'd to be as kind to me as she
could, and I lodge'd with her for a time, till it was found necessary to do
otherwise; she had some Persons of Character that frequently lodge'd in her
House, and in particular the Gentleman, who, as I said, singled me out for his
Companion in the Winter before; and he came down again with another Gentleman in
his Company and two Servants, and lodge'd in the same House: I suspected that my
Landlady had invited him thither, letting him know that I was still with her,
but she deny'd it.
    In a Word, this Gentleman came down and continue'd to single me out for his
peculiar Confidence; he was a complete Gentleman, that must be confess'd, and
his Company was agreeable to me, as mine, if I might believe him, was to him; he
made no Professions to me, but of an extraordinary Respect, and he had such an
Opinion of my Virtue, that, as he often profess'd, he believe'd, if he should
offer any thing else, I should reject him with Contempt; he soon understood from
me that I was a Widow, that I had arrive'd at Bristol from Virginia by the last
Ships; and that I waited at the Bath till the next Virginia Fleet should arrive,
by which I expected considerable Effects; I understood by him, that he had a
Wife, but that the Lady was distemper'd in her Head, and was under the Conduct
of her own Relations, which he consented to, to avoid any Reflection that might
be cast upon him for mismanaging her Cure; and in the mean time he came to the
Bath to divert his Thoughts under such a melancholy Circumstance.
    My Landlady, who of her own accord encourage'd the Correspondence on all
Occasions, gave me an advantageous Character of him, as a Man of Honour and of
Virtue, as well as of a great Estate; and indeed I had Reason to say so of him
too, for tho' we lodge'd both on a Floor, and he had frequently come into my
Chamber, even when I was in Bed, and I also into his, yet he never offered any
thing to me farther than a Kiss, or so much as solicited me to any thing till
long after, as you shall hear.
    I frequently took Notice to my Landlady of his exceeding Modesty, and she
again used to tell me, she believe'd it was so from the Beginning; however she
used to tell me that she thought I ought to expect some Gratifications from him
for my Company, for indeed he did as it were engross me. I told her, I had not
given him the least Occasion to think I wanted it, or that I would accept of it
from him; She told me, she would take that part upon her, and she manage'd it so
dextrously, that the first time we were together alone, after she had talk'd
with him, he began to enquire a little into my Circumstances, as how I had
subsisted my self since I came on shore, and whether I did not want Money? I
stood off very boldly, I told him that tho' my Cargoe of Tobacco was damag'd,
yet that it was not quite lost: that the Merchant that I had been consigned to,
had so honestly managed for me that I had not wanted, and that I hop'd, with
frugal Management, I should make it hold out till more would come, which I
expected by the next Fleet; that in the mean time I had retrench'd my Expenses,
and whereas I kept a Maid last Season, now I liv'd without; and whereas I had a
Chamber and a Dining Room then on the first Floor, I now had but one Room two
Pair of Stairs, and the like; but I live, said I, as well satisfy'd now as then;
adding, that his Company had made me live much more cheerfully than otherwise I
should have done, for which I was much oblige'd to him; and so I put off all room
for any Offer at the present: It was not long before he attack'd me again, and
told me he found that I was backward to trust him with the Secret of my
Circumstances, which he was sorry for; assuring me that he enquire'd into it with
no design to satisfy his own Curiosity, but meerly to assist me if there was any
Occasion; but since I would not own my self to stand in need of any Assistance,
he had but one thing more to desire of me, and that was, that I would promise
him that when I was any way streighten'd, I would frankly tell him of it, and
that I would make use of him with the same Freedom that he made the Offer;
adding, that I should always find I had a true Friend, tho' perhaps I was afraid
to trust him.
    I omitted nothing that was fit to be said by one infinitely oblige'd, to let
him know, that I had a due Sense of his Kindness; and indeed from that time, I
did not appear so much reserve'd to him as I had done before, tho' still within
the Bounds of the strictest Virtue on both sides; but how free soever our
Conversation was, I could not arrive to that Freedom which he desire'd, viz. to
tell him I wanted Money, tho' I was secretly very glad of his Offer.
    Some Weeks pass'd after this, and still I never ask'd him for Money; when my
Landlady, a cunning Creature, who had often press'd me to it, but found that I
could not do it, makes a Story of her own inventing, and comes in bluntly to me
when we were together, O! Widow, says she, I have bad News to tell you this
Morning: What is that, said I, is the Virginia Ships taken by the French? for
that was my Fear. No, no, says she, but the Man you sent to Bristol Yesterday
for Money is come back, and says he has brought none.
    I could by no Means like her Project; I thought it look'd too much like
prompting him, which he did not want, and I saw that I should lose nothing by
being backward, so took her up short; I can't imagine why he should say so, said
I, for I assure you he brought me all the Money I sent him for, and here it is,
said I (pulling out my Purse with about 12 Guineas in it) and added, I intend
you shall have most of it by and by.
    He seem'd distasted a little at her talking as she did, as well as I, taking
it as I fancy'd he would, as something forward of her; but when he saw me give
such an Answer, he came immediately to himself: The next Morning we talk'd of it
again, when I found he was fully satisfied; and smiling said, he hop'd I would
not want Money, and not tell him of it, and that I had promise'd him otherwise: I
told him I had been very much dissatisfied at my Landlady's talking so publicly
the Day before of what she had nothing to do with; but I suppose'd she wanted
what I ow'd her, which was about Eight Guineas, which I had resolve'd to give
her, and had given it her the same Night.
    He was in a mighty good Humour, when he heard me say, I had paid her, and it
went off into some other Discourse at that time; but the next Morning he having
heard me up before him, he call'd to me, and I answer'd; he ask'd me to come
into his Chamber; he was in Bed when I came in, and he made me come and sit down
on his Bed side, for he said he had something to say to me. After some very kind
Expressions, he ask'd me, if I would be very honest to him, and give a sincere
Answer to one thing he would desire of me: After some little Cavil with him at
the word Sincere, and asking him if I had ever given him any Answers which were
not Sincere, I promise'd him I would; why then his Request was, he said, to let
him see my Purse; I immediately put my Hand into my Pocket, and laughing at him,
pull'd it out, and there was in it three Guineas and a Half; then he ask'd me,
if there was all the Money I had? I told him no, laughing again, not by a great
deal.
    Well then, he said, he would have me promise to go and fetch him all the
Money I had, every Farthing: I told him I would, and I went into my Chamber, and
fetch'd him a little private Drawer, where I had about six Guineas more, and
some Silver, and threw it all down upon the Bed, and told him there was all my
Wealth, honestly to a Shilling: He look'd a little at it, but did not tell it,
and huddled it all into the Drawer again, and then reaching his Pocket, pull'd
out a Key, and bad me open a little Walnut-tree Box he had upon the Table, and
bring him such a Drawer, which I did: in this Drawer, there was a great deal of
Money in Gold, I believe near 200 Guineas, but I knew not how much: He took the
Drawer, and taking me by the Hand, made me put it in, and take a whole Handful;
I was backward at that, but he held my Hand hard in his Hand, and put it into
the Drawer, and made me take out as many Guineas almost as I could well take up
at once.
    When I had done so, he made me put them into my Lap, and took my little
Drawer, and pour'd out all my own Money among his, and bad me get me gone, and
carry it all into my own Chamber.
    I relate this Story the more particularly, because of the good Humour of it,
and to show the Temper with which we convers'd: It was not long after this, but
he began every Day to find Fault with my clothes, with my Laces, and
Head-dresses; and in a Word, press'd me to buy better, which by the way I was
willing enough to do, tho' I did not seem to be so; I love'd nothing in the World
better than fine clothes, but I told him I must Housewife the Money he had lent
me, or else I should not be able to pay him again. He then told me in a few
Words, that as he had a sincere Respect for me, and knew my Circumstances, he
had not lent me that Money, but given it me, and that he thought I had merited
it from him, by giving him my Company so entirely as I had done: After this, he
made me take a Maid, and keep House, and his Friend being gone, he obliged me to
dyet him, which I did very willingly, believing, as it appear'd, that I should
lose nothing by it, nor did the Woman of the House fail to find her Account in
it too.
    We had liv'd thus near three Months, when the Company beginning to wear away
at the Bath, he talk'd of going away, and fain he would have me to go to London
with him: I was not very easy in that Proposal, not knowing what Posture I was
to live in there, or how he might use me: But while this was in Debate, he fell
very Sick; he had gone out to a Place in Somersetshire, call'd Shepton, and was
there taken very ill, and so ill that he could not Travel, so he sent his Man
back to the Bath, to beg me that I would hire a Coach and come over to him:
Before he went, he had left his Money and other things of Value with me, and
what to do with them I did not know, but I secure'd them as well as I could, and
lock'd up the Lodgings and went to him, where I found him very ill indeed, so I
persuaded him to be carry'd in a Litter to Bath, where was more Help and better
Advice to be had.
    He consented, and I brought him to the Bath, which was about fifteen Miles,
as I remember: here he continued very ill of a Fever, and kept his Bed five
Weeks, all which time I nurs'd him and tended him as carefully as if I had been
his Wife; indeed if I had been his Wife I could not have done more; I sat up
with him so much and so often, that at last, indeed he would not let me sit up
any longer, and then I got a Pallet Bed into his Room, and lay in it just at his
Bed's Feet.
    I was indeed sensibly affected with his Condition, and with the
Apprehensions of losing such a Friend as he was, and was like to be to me, and I
us'd to sit and cry by him many Hours together: At last he grew better, and gave
hopes that he would recover, as indeed he did, tho' very slowly.
    Were it otherwise than what I am going to say, I should not be backward to
disclose it, as it is apparent I have done in other Cases; but I affirm, through
all this Conversation, abating the coming into the Chamber when I or he was in
Bed, and the necessary Offices of attending him Night and Day, when he was Sick,
there had not pass'd the least immodest Word or Action between us. O! that it
had been so to the last.
    After some time he gathered Strength and grew well apace, and I would have
remove'd my Pallet Bed, but he would not let me, till he was able to venture
himself without any Body to sit up with him, when I remove'd to my own Chamber.
    He took many Occasions to express his Sense of my Tenderness for him; and
when he grew well he made me a Present of fifty Guineas for my Care, and, as he
call'd it, hazarding my Life to save his.
    And now he made deep Protestations of a sincere inviolable Affection for me,
but with the utmost reserve for my Virtue, and his own: I told him I was fully
satisfy'd of it; he carried it that length that he protested to me, that if he
was naked in Bed with me, he would as sacredly preserve my Virtue, as he would
defend it, if I was assaulted by a Ravisher; I believe'd him, and told him I did
so; but this did not satisfy him, he would, he said, wait for some Opportunity
to give me an undoubted Testimony of it.
    It was a great while after this that I had Occasion, on my Business, to go
to Bristol, upon which he hir'd me a Coach, and would go with me; and now indeed
our Intimacy increas'd: From Bristol he carry'd me to Gloucester, which was
meerly a Journey of Pleasure to take the Air; and here it was our hap to have no
Lodgings in the Inn, but in one large Chamber with two Beds in it: The Master of
the House going with us to show his Rooms, and coming into that Room, said very
frankly to him, Sir, It is none of my Business to enquire whether the Lady be
your Spouse or no, but if not, you may lye as honestly in these two Beds, as if
you were in two Chambers, and with that he pulls a great Curtain which drew
quite cross the Room, and effectually divided the Beds; well, says my Friend,
very readily, these Beds will do, and as for the rest, we are too near a Kin to
lye together, tho' we may lodge near one another; and this put an honest Face on
the thing too. When we came to go to Bed, he decently went out of the Room till
I was in Bed, and then went to Bed in the other Bed, but lay there talking to me
a great while.
    At last, repeating his usual saying, that he could lye naked in the Bed with
me, and not offer me the least Injury, he starts out of his Bed, and now my Dear
, says he, you shall see how just I will be to you, and that I can keep my Word,
and away he comes to my Bed.
    I resisted a little, but I must confess I should not have resisted him much,
if he had not made those Promises at all; so after a little struggle, I lay
still and let him come to Bed; when he was there he took me in his Arms, and so
I lay all Night with him, but he had no more to do with me, or offer'd anything
to me, other than embracing me, as I say, in his Arms, no not the whole Night,
but rose up and dress'd him in the Morning, and left me as innocent for him as I
was the Day I was born.
    This was a surprising thing to me, and perhaps may be so to others, who know
how the Laws of Nature Work; for he was a vigorous brisk Person; nor did he act
thus on a Principle of Religion at all, but of meer Affection; insisting on it,
that tho' I was to him the most agreeable Woman in the World, yet because he
love'd me he could not injure me.
    I own it was a noble Principle, but as it was what I never saw before, so it
was perfectly amazing. We travel'd the rest of the Journey as we did before,
and came back to the Bath, where, as he had Opportunity to come to me when he
would, he often repeated the same Moderation, and I frequently lay with him, and
altho' all the Familiarities of Man and Wife were common to us, yet he never
once offered to go any farther, and he valu'd himself much upon it; I do not
say, that I was so wholly pleas'd with it as he thought I was; for I own I was
much wickeder than he.
    We liv'd thus near Two Years, only with this Exception, that he went three
times to London in that time, and once he continue'd there four Months, but to do
him Justice, he always supply'd me with Money to subsist on very Handsomely.
    Had we continue'd thus, I confess we had had much to boast of; but as wise
Men say, it is ill venturing too near the brink of a Command, so we found it;
and here again I must do him the Justice to own that the first Breach was not on
his Part: It was one Night that we were in Bed together warm and merry, and
having drank, I think, a little more both of us, than usual, tho' not in the
least to disorder us, when after some other Follies which I cannot Name, and
being clasp'd close in his Arms, I told him, (I repeat it with shame and horror
of soul) that I could find in my Heart to discharge him of his Engagement for
one Night and no more.
    He took me at my Word immediately, and after that, there was no resisting
him; neither indeed had I any mind to resist him any more.
    Thus the Government of our Virtue was broken, and I exchang'd the Place of
Friend, for that unmusical harsh sounding Title of Whore. In the Morning we were
both at our Penitentials, I cried very heartily, he express'd himself very
sorry; but that was all either of us could do at that time, and the way being
thus clear'd, and the Bars of Virtue and Conscience thus remove'd, we had the
less to struggle with.
    It was but a dull kind of Conversation that we had together for all the rest
of that Week, I look'd on him with Blushes; and every now and then started that
melancholy Objection, What if I should be with Child now? What will become of
me then? He encouraged me by telling me, that as long as I was true to him, he
would be so to me; and since it was gone such a length (which indeed he never
intended), yet if I was with Child, he would take care of that and me too: This
harden'd us both; I assured him if I was with Child, I would die for want of a
Midwife rather than name him as the Father of it; and he assured me, I should
never want if I should be with Child: These mutual Assurances harden'd us in the
thing, and after this we repeated the Crime as often as we pleased, till at
length, as I fear'd, so it came to pass, and I was indeed with Child.
    After I was sure it was so, and I had satisfied him of it too, we began to
think of taking Measures for the managing it, and I propos'd trusting the Secret
to my Landlady, and asking her Advice, which he agreed to: My Landlady, a Woman
(as I found) us'd to such things, made light of it; she said, she knew it would
come to that at last, and made us very merry about it: As I said above, we found
her an experienced old Lady at such Work; she undertook everything, engage'd to
procure a Midwife and a Nurse, to satisfy all Enquiries, and bring us off with
Reputation, and she did so very dexterously indeed.
    When I grew near my time, she desire'd my Gentleman to go away to London, or
make as if he did so; when he was gone, she acquainted the Parish Officers that
there was a Lady ready to lye in at her House, but that she knew her Husband
very well, and gave them, as she pretended, an account of his Name, which she
call'd Sir Walter Cleave; telling them, he was a worthy Gentleman, and that he
would answer for all Enquiries, and the like: This satisfied the Parish Officers
presently, and I lay Inn in as much Credit as I could have done if I had really
been my Lady Cleave; and was assisted in my Travail by three or four of the best
Citizens Wives of Bath, which however made me a little the more Expensive to
him; I often expressed my concern to him about that part, but he bid me not be
concerned at it.
    As he had furnish'd me very sufficiently with Money for the extraordinary
Expenses of my lying Inn, I had every thing very handsome about me; but did not
affect to be so Gay or Extravagant neither; besides, knowing the World, as I had
done, and that such kind of things do not often last long, I took care to lay up
as much Money as I could for a wet Day, as I call'd it; making him believe it
was all spent upon the extraordinary Appearance of things in my lying Inn.
    By this Means, with what he had given me as above, I had at the end of my
lying Inn 200 Guineas by me, including also what was left of my own.
    I was brought to Bed of a fine Boy indeed, and a charming Child it was; and
when he heard of it, he wrote me a very kind obliging Letter about it, and then
told me, he thought it would look better for me to come away for London as soon
as I was up and well, that he had provided Apartments for me at Hamersmith, as
if I came only from London, and that after a while I should go back to the Bath,
and he would go with me.
    I lik'd his Offer very well, and hir'd a Coach on purpose, and taking my
Child, and a Wet-Nurse to tend and suckle it, and a Maid Servant with me, away I
went for London.
    He met me at Reading in his own Charriot, and taking me into that, left the
Servant and the Child in the hir'd Coach, and so he brought me to my new
Lodgings at, Hamersmith; with which I had abundance of Reason to be very well
pleas'd, for they were very handsome Rooms.
    And now I was indeed in the height of what I might call Prosperity, and I
wanted nothing but to be a Wife, which however could not be in this Case, and
therefore on all Occasions I studied to save what I could, as I said above,
against the time of Scarcity; knowing well enough that such things as these do
not always continue, that Men that keep Mistresses often change them, grow weary
of them, or Jealous of them, or something or other; and sometimes the Ladies
that are thus well us'd, are not careful by a prudent Conduct to preserve the
Esteem of their Persons, or the nice Article of their Fidelity, and then they
are justly cast off with Contempt.
    But I was secure'd in this Point, for as I had no Inclination to change, so I
had no manner of Acquaintance, so no Temptation to look any farther; I kept no
Company but in the Family where I lodge'd, and with a Clergyman's Lady at next
Door; so that when he was absent I visited no Body, nor did he ever find me out
of my Chamber or Parlour whenever he came down; if I went any where to take the
Air it was always with him.
    The living in this manner with him, and his with me, was certainly the most
undesigned thing in the World; he often protested to me that when he became
first acquainted with me, and even to the very Night when we first broke in upon
our Rules, he never had the least Design of lying with me; that he always had a
sincere Affection for me, but not the least real Inclination to do what he had
done; I assured him I never suspected him, that if I had, I should not so easily
have yielded to the Freedoms which brought it on, but [that it] was all a
Surprise, and was owing to our having yielded too far to our mutual Inclinations
that Night; and indeed I have often observe'd since, and leave it as a Caution to
the Readers of this Story, that we ought to be cautious of gratifying our
Inclinations in loose and lew'd Freedoms, lest we find our Resolutions of Virtue
fail us in the Juncture when their Assistance should be most necessary.
    It is true that from the first Hour I began to converse with him, I resolve'd
to let him lye with me, if he offered it; but it was because I wanted his Help,
and knew of no other way of securing him: But when we were that Night together,
and, as I have said, had gone such a length, I found my Weakness, the
Inclination was not to be resisted, but I was obliged to yield up all even
before he ask'd it.
    However, he was so just to me that he never upbraided me with that; nor did
he ever express the least dislike of my Conduct on any other Occasion, but
always protested he was as much delighted with my Company as he was the first
Hour we came together.
    It is true that he had no Wife, that is to say, she was no Wife to him, but
the Reflections of Conscience oftentimes snatch a Man, especially a Man of
Sense, from the Arms of a Mistress, as it did him at last, tho' on another
Occasion.
    On the other hand, tho' I was not without secret Reproaches of my own
Conscience for the Life I led, and that even in the greatest height of the
Satisfaction I ever took, yet I had the terrible prospect of Poverty and
Starving, which lay on me as a frightful Spectre, so that there was no looking
behind me: But as Poverty brought me into it, so fear of Poverty kept me in it,
and I frequently resolve'd to leave it quite off, if I could but come to lay up
Money enough to maintain me; But these were Thoughts of no weight, and whenever
he came to me they vanish'd; for his Company was so Delightful, that there was
no being Melancholly when he was there, the Reflections were all the Subject of
those Hours when I was alone.
    I liv'd six Years in this happy, but unhappy Condition, in which time I
brought him three Children, but only the first of them liv'd; and tho' I remove'd
twice in that Six Years, yet I came back the Sixth Year to my first Lodgings at
Hamersmith: Here it was that I was one Morning surpris'd with a kind but
melancholy Letter from my Gentleman; intimating, that he was very ill, and was
afraid he should have another Fit of Sickness, but that his Wife's Relations
being in the House with him, it would not be practicable to have me with him,
which however he express'd his great Dissatisfaction in, and that he wish'd I
could be allow'd to tend and Nurse him as I did before.
    I was very much concern'd at this Account, and was very impatient to know
how it was with him; I waited a Fortnight or thereabouts, and heard nothing,
which Surprise'd me, and I began to be very uneasy indeed; I think, I may say,
that for the next Fortnight I was near to distracted: It was my particular
Difficulty, that I did not know directly where he was; for I understood at first
he was in the Lodgings of his Wife's Mother; but having remove'd my self to
London, I soon found, by the help of the Direction I had for writing my Letters
to him, how to enquire after him, and there I found that he was at a House in
Bloomsbury, whither he had remove'd his whole Family; and that his Wife, and
Wife's Mother, were in the same House, tho' the Wife was not suffer'd to know
that she was in the same House with her Husband.
    Here I also soon understood that he was at the last Extremity, which made me
almost at the last Extremity too, to have a true Account: One Night I had the
Curiosity to disguise my self like a Servant Maid in a round Cap and Straw Hat,
and went to the Door, as sent by a Lady of his Neighbourhood, where he liv'd
before, and giving Master and Mistress's Service, I said I was sent to know how
Mr. ---- did, and how he had rested that Night; in delivering this Message I got
the Opportunity I desire'd, for speaking with one of the Maids, I held a long
Gossips Tale with her, and had all the Particulars of his Illness, which I found
was a Pluresy, attended with a Cough and Fever; she told me also who was in the
House, and how his Wife was, who, by her Relation, they were in some hopes might
recover her Understanding; but as to the Gentleman himself, the Doctors said
there was very little hopes of him, that in the Morning they thought he had been
dying, and that he was but little better then, for they did not expect that he
could live over the next Night.
    This was heavy News for me, and I began now to see an end of my Prosperity,
and to see that it was well I had plaid the good Housewife, and save'd something
while he was alive, for now I had no view of my own Living before me.
    It lay very heavy upon my Mind too, that I had a Son, a fine lovely Boy,
about five Years old, and no Provision made for it, at least that I knew of;
with these Considerations, and a sad Heart, I went home that Evening, and began
to cast with my self how I should live, and in what manner to bestow my self,
for the residue of my Life.
    You may be sure I could not rest without enquiring again very quickly what
was become of him; and not venturing to go my self, I sent several sham
Messengers, till after a Fortnights waiting longer, I found that there was hopes
of his Life, tho' he was still very ill; then I abated my sending to the House,
and in some time after I learnt in the Neighbourhood that he was about House,
and then that he was Abroad again.
    I made no doubt then but that I should soon hear of him, and began to
comfort my self with my Circumstances, being, as I thought, recovered; I waited
a Week, and two Weeks, and with much surprise near two Months and heard nothing,
but that being recovered he was gone into the Country for the Air, after his
Distemper; after this it was yet two Months more, and then I understood he was
come to his City-House again, but still I heard nothing from him.
    I had written several Letters for him, and directed them as usual, and found
two or three of them had been call'd for, but not the rest: I wrote again in a
more pressing manner than ever, and in one of them let him know, that I must be
force'd to wait on him my self, representing my Circumstances, the Rent of
Lodgings to pay, and the Provision for the Child wanting, and my own deplorable
Condition, destitute of Subsistance after his most solemn Engagement, to take
Care of, and provide for me; I took a Copy of this Letter, and finding it lay at
the House, near a Month, and was not call'd for, I found Means to have the Copy
of it put into his Hands at a Coffee-House, where I found he had us'd to go.
    This Letter force'd an Answer from him, by which, tho' I found I was to be
abandon'd, yet I found he had sent a Letter to me some time before, desiring me
to go down to the Bath again; its Contents I shall come to presently.
    It is true that Sick Beds are the times, when such Correspondences as this
are look'd on with different Countenances, and seen with other Eyes, than we saw
them with before: My Lover had been at the Gates of Death, and at the very brink
of Eternity; and it seems struck with a due Remorse, and with sad Reflections
upon his past Life of Gallantry and Levity; and among the rest, his criminal
Correspondence with me, which was indeed neither more or less than a long
continue'd Life of Adultery, had represented itself as it really was, not as it
had been formerly thought by him to be, and he look'd upon it now with a just
Abhorence.
    I cannot but observe also, and leave it for the Direction of my Sex in such
Cases of Pleasure, that whenever sincere Repentance succeeds such a Crime as
this, there never fails to attend a Hatred of the Object; and the more the
Affection might seem to be before, the Hatred will be more in Proportion: It
will always be so, indeed it cannot be otherwise; for there cannot be a true and
sincere Abhorence of the Offence, and the Love to the Cause of it remain; there
will with an Abhorence of the Sin be found a Detestation of the fellow Sinner;
you can expect no other.
    I found it so here, tho' good Manners, and Justice in this Gentleman, kept
him from carrying it on to any Extream; but the short History of his Part in
this Affair was thus; he perceived by my last Letter, and by the rest, which he
went for after, that I was not gone to the Bath, and that his first Letter had
not come to my Hand, upon which he writes me this following:
 
        Madam,
            I am surpris'd that my Letter dated the 8th of last Month, did not
        come to your Hand; I give you my Word it was deliver'd at your Lodgings,
        and to the Hands of your Maid.
             I need not acquaint you with what has been my Condition for some
        time past; and how having been at the Edge of the Grave, I am by the
        unexpected and undeserved Mercy of Heaven restor'd again: In the
        Condition I have been in, it cannot be strange to you that our unhappy
        Correspondence has not been the least of the Burthens which lay upon my
        Conscience; I need say no more, those things that must be repented of,
        must be also reform'd.
            I wish you would think of going back to the Bath; I enclose you here
        a Bill for 50l. for clearing your self at your Lodgings, and carrying
        you down, and hope it will be no Surprise to you to add, that on this
        Account only, and not for any Offence given me on your side, I can SEE
        YOU NO MORE; I will take due care of the Child, leave him where he is,
        or take him with you, as you please; I wish you the like Reflections,
        and that they may be to your Advantage; I am, &amp;c.
 
I was struck with this Letter, as with a thousand Wounds, the Reproaches of my
own Conscience were such as I cannot express, for I was not blind to my own
Crime; and I reflected that I might with less Offence have continued with my
Brother, since there was no Crime in our Marriage on that Score, neither of us
knowing it.
    But I never once reflected that I was all this while a marry'd Woman, a Wife
to Mr. ---- the Linnen-Draper, who tho' he had left me by the Necessity of his
Circumstances, had no Power to discharge me from the Marriage Contract which was
between us, or to give me a legal liberty to marry again; so that I had been no
less than a Whore and an Adulteress all this while: I then reproach'd my self
with the Liberties I had taken, and how I had been a Snare to this Gentleman,
and that indeed I was principal in the Crime; that now he was mercifully
snatch'd out of the Gulph by a convincing Work upon his Mind, but that I was
left as if I was abandon'd by Heaven to a continuing in my Wickedness.
    Under these Reflections I continue'd very pensive and sad for near a Month,
and did not go down to the Bath, having no Inclination to be with the Woman who
I was with before, least, as I thought, she should prompt me to some wicked
Course of Life again, as she had done; and besides, I was loth she should know I
was cast off as above.
    And now I was greatly perplex'd about my little Boy; it was Death to me to
part with the Child, and yet when I consider'd the Danger of being one time or
other left with him to keep without being able to support him, I then resolve'd
to leave him; but then I concluded to be near him my self too, that I might have
the Satisfaction of seeing him, without the Care of providing for him. So I sent
my Gentleman a short Letter that I had obey'd his Orders in all things, but that
of going back to the Bath, that however parting from him was a Wound to me that
I could never recover, yet that I was fully satisfied his Reflections were just,
and would be very far from desiring to obstruct his Reformation.
    Then I represented my own Circumstances to him in the most moving Terms: I
told him that those unhappy Distresses which first mov'd him to a generous
Friendship for me, would, I hope, move him to a little Concern for me now; tho'
the Criminal part of our Correspondence, which I believd neither of us intended
to fall into at that time, was broken off; that I desire'd to repent as sincerely
as he had done, but entreated him to put me in some Condition, that I might not
be expos'd to Temptations from the frightful prospect of Poverty and Distress;
and if he had the least Apprehensions of my being troublesome to him, I beg'd he
would put me in a Posture to go back to my Mother in Virginia, from whence he
knew I came, and that would put an end to all his Fears on that account; I
concluded, that if he would send me 50l. more to facilitate my going away, I
would send him back a general Release, and would promise never to disturb him
more with any Importunities; unless it were to hear of the well-doing of the
Child, who, if I found my Mother living, and my Circumstances able, I would send
for and take him also off of his Hands.
    This was indeed all a Cheat thus far, viz. that I had no intention to go to
Virginia, as the Account of my former Affairs there may convince any Body of;
but the Business was to get this last Fifty Pounds of him, if possible, knowing
well enough it would be the last Penny I was ever to expect.
    However, the Argument I us'd, namely, of giving him a general Release, and
never troubling him any more, prevail'd effectually, and he sent me a Bill for
the Money by a Person who brought with him a general Release for me to sign, and
which I frankly sign'd; and thus, tho' full sore against my will, a final End
was put to this Affair.
    And here I cannot but reflect upon the unhappy Consequence of too great
Freedoms between Persons stated as we were, upon the pretence of innocent
Intentions, Love of Friendship, and the like; for the Flesh has generally so
great a share in those Friendships, that it is great odds, but Inclination
prevails at last over the most solemn Resolutions; and that Vice breaks in at
the Breaches of Decency, which really innocent Friendship ought to preserve with
the greatest strictness; but I leave the Readers of these things to their own
just Reflections, which they will be more able to make effectual than I, who so
soon forgot my self, and am therefore but a very indifferent Monitor.
    I was now a single Person again, as I may call my self; I was loos'd from
all the Obligations either of Wedlock or Mistressship in the World; except my
Husband the Linnen-Draper, who I having not now heard from in almost Fifteen
Years, no Body could blame me for thinking my self entirely freed from; seeing
also he had at his going away told me, that if I did not hear frequently from
him, I should conclude he was dead, and I might freely marry again to whom I
pleas'd.
    I now began to cast up my Accounts; I had by many Letters, and much
Importunity, and with the Intercession of my Mother too, had a second return of
some Goods from my Brother, as I now call him, in Virginia, to make up the
Damage of the Cargo I brought away with me, and this too was upon the Condition
of my sealing a general Release to him, which though I thought hard, but yet I
was oblige'd to promise. I manage'd so well in this case, that I got my Goods away
before the Release was sign'd, and then I always found something or other to say
to evade the thing, and to put off the signing it at all; till at length I
pretended I must write to my Brother, before I could do it.
    Including this Recruit, and before I got the last 50l. I found my strength
to amount, put all together, to about 400l. so that with that I had above 450l.
I had save'd 100l. more, but I met with a Disaster with that, which was this;
that a Goldsmith in whose Hands I had trusted it, broke, so I lost 70. of my
Money, the Man's Composition not making above 30l. out of his 100l. I had a
little Plate, but not much, and was well enough stock'd with clothes and Linnen.
    With this Stock I had the World to begin again; but you are to consider,
that I was not now the same Woman as when I liv'd at Rotherbith; for first of
all I was near 20 Years older, and did not look the better for my Age, nor for
my Rambles to Virginia and back again; and tho' I omitted nothing that might set
me out to Advantage, except Painting, for that I never stoop'd to, yet there
would always be some difference seen between Five and Twenty and Two and Forty.
    I cast about innumerable ways for my future State of Life, and began to
consider very seriously what I should do, but nothing offer'd; I took care to
make the World take me for something more than I was, and had it given out that
I was a Fortune, and that my Estate was in my own Hands, the last of which was
very true, the first of it was as above: I had no Acquaintance, which was one of
my worst Misfortunes, and the Consequence of that was, I had no Adviser, and
above all, I had no Body to whom I could in confidence commit the Secret of my
Circumstances to; and I found by Experience, that to be Friendless is the worst
Condition, next to being in want, that a Woman can be reduce'd to: I say a Woman,
because 'tis evident Men can be their own Advisers, and their own Directors, and
know how to work themselves out of Difficulties and into Business better than
Women; but if a Woman has no Friend to Communicate her Affairs to, and to advise
and assist her, 'tis ten to one but she is undone; nay, and the more Money she
has, the more Danger she is in of being wrong'd and deceive'd; and this was my
Case in the Affair of the Hundred Pound which I left in the Hand of the
Goldsmith, as above, whose Credit, it seems, was upon the Ebb before, but I that
had no Body to consult with, knew nothing of it, and so lost my Money.
    When a Woman is thus left desolate and void of Council, she is just like a
Bag of Money, or a Jewel dropped on the Highway, which is a Prey to the next
Comer; if a Man of Virtue and upright Principles happens to find it, he will
have it cried, and the Owner may come to hear of it again; but how many times
shall such a thing fall into Hands that will make no scruple of seizing it for
their own, to once that it shall come into good Hands.
    This was evidently my Case, for I was now a loose unguided Creature, and had
no Help, no Assistance, no Guide for my Conduct. I knew what I aim'd at, and
what I wanted, but knew nothing how to pursue the End by direct means; I wanted
to be plac'd in a settled State of Living, and had I happen'd to meet with a
sober good Husband, I should have been as true a Wife to him as Virtue it self
could have form'd: If I had been otherwise, the Vice came in always at the Door
of Necessity, not at the Door of Inclination; and I understood too well, by the
want of it, what the Value of a settl'd Life was, to do any thing to forfeit the
felicity of it; nay, I should have made the better Wife for all the Difficulties
I had pass'd thro', by a great deal; nor did I in any of the Times that I had
been a Wife, give my Husbands the least uneasiness on account of my Behaviour.
    But all this was nothing; I found no incouraging Prospect; I waited, I liv'd
regularly, and with as much frugality as became my Circumstances, but nothing
offer'd; nothing presented, and the main Stock wasted apace; what to do I knew
not, the Terror of approaching Poverty lay hard upon my Spirits: I had some
Money, but where to place it I knew not, nor would the Interest of it maintain
me, at least not in London.
    Atlength a new Scene opened: There was in the House, where I lodge'd, a North
Country Gentlewoman, and nothing was more frequent in her Discourse, than her
account of the cheapness of Provisions, and the easy way of living in her
Country; how plentiful and how cheap everything was, what good Company they
kept, and the like; till at last I told her she almost tempted me to go and live
in her Country; for I that was a Widow, tho' I had sufficient to live on, yet
had no way of increasing it, and that London was an extravagant Place; that I
found I could not live here under One Hundred Pound a Year, unless I kept no
Company, no Servant, made no Appearance, and buried my self in Privacy, as if I
was oblige'd to it by Necessity.
    I should have observe'd, that she was always made to believe, as every Body
else was, that I was a great Fortune, or at least that I had Three or Four
Thousand Pounds, if not more, and all in my own Hands; and she was mighty sweet
upon me when she thought me inclin'd in the least to go into her Country; she
said she had a sister liv'd near Liverpool, that her Brother was a considerable
Gentleman there, and had a great Estate also in Ireland, that she wou'd go down
there in about two Months, and if I would give her my Company thither, I should
be as welcome as her self for a Month or more as I pleas'd, till I should see
how I lik'd the Country; and if I thought fit to live there, she would undertake
they would take care, tho' they did not entertain Lodgers themselves, they would
recommend me to some agreeable Family, where I should be plac'd to my content.
    If this Woman had known my real Circumstances, she would never have laid so
many Snares, and taken so many weary steps to catch a poor desolate Creature
that was good for little when it was caught; and indeed I, whose Case was almost
desperate, and thought I cou'd not be much worse, was not very anxious about
what might befall me, provided they did me no personal Injury; so I suffered my
self, tho' not without a great deal of Invitation, and great Professions of
sincere Friendship and real Kindness, I say, I suffer'd my self to be prevail'd
upon to go with her, and accordingly I put my self in a Posture for a Journey,
tho' I did not absolutely know whither I was to go.
    And now I found my self in great Distress; what little I had in the World
was all in Money, except as before, a little Plate, some Linnen, and my clothes;
as for Houshold stuff I had little or none, for I had liv'd always in Lodgings;
but I had not one Friend in the World with whom to trust that little I had, or
to direct me how to dispose of it; I thought of the Bank, and of the other
Companies in London, but I had no Friend to commit the Management of it to, and
to keep and carry about me Bank Bills, Talleys, Orders, and such things, I
look'd upon as unsafe; that if they were lost my Money was lost, and then I was
undone; and on the other hand I might be robb'd, and perhaps murder'd in a
strange place for them; and what to do I knew not.
    It came into my Thoughts one Morning that I would go to the Bank my self,
where I had often been to receive the Interest of some Bills I had, and where I
had found the Clark, to whom I apply'd my self, very Honest to me, and
particularly so fair one time, that when I had misstold my Money, and taken less
than my due, and was coming away, he set me to rights and gave me the rest,
which he might have put into his own Pocket.
    I went to him, and ask'd if he would trouble himself to be my Adviser, who
was a poor friendless Widow, and knew not what to do: He told me, if I desire'd
his Opinion of any thing within the reach of his Business, he would do his
Endeavour that I should not be wrong'd, but that he would also help me to a good
sober Person of his Acquaintance, who was a Clark in such Business too, tho' not
in their House, whose judgement was good, and whose Honesty I mighty depend upon;
for, added he, I will answer for him, and for every step he takes; if he wrongs
you, Madam, of one Farthing, it shall lye at my door; and he delights to assist
People in such Cases, he does it as an act of Chaity.
    I was a little at a stand at this Discourse, but after some pause I told
him, I had rather have depended upon him, because I had found him Honest, but if
that cou'd not be, I would take his Recommendation sooner than any ones else; I
dare say, Madam, says he, that you will be as well satisfied with my Friend as
with me, and he is thoroughly able to assist you, which I am not; it seems he
had his Hands full of the Business of the Bank, and had engage'd to meddle with
no other Business than that of his Office: He added, that his Friend should take
nothing of me for his Advice or Assistance, and this indeed encourage'd me.
    He appointed the same Evening, after the Bank was shut, for me to meet him
and his Friend: as soon as I saw his Friend, and he began but to talk of the
Affair, I was fully satisfied I had a very honest Man to deal with, his
Countenance spoke it, and his Character, as I heard afterwards, was every where
so good, that I had no room for any more doubts upon me.
    After the first meeting, in which I only said what I had said before, he
appointed me to come the next Day, telling me, I might in the mean time satisfy
my self of him by enquiry, which however I knew not how to do, having no
Acquaintance my self.
    Accordingly I met him the next Day, when I entered more freely with him into
my Case; I told him my Circumstances at large, that I was a Widow come over from
America, perfectly desolate and friendless; that I had a little Money, and but a
little, and was almost distracted for fear of losing it, having no Friend in the
World to trust with the management of it; that I was going into the North of
England to live cheap, that my Stock might not waste; that I would willingly
Lodge my Money in the Bank, but that I durst not carry the Bills about me; and
how to Correspond about it, or with who I knew not.
    He told me I might lodge the Money in the Bank as an Account, and its being
entred in the Books would entitle me to the Money at any time, and if I was in
the North I might draw Bills on the Cashier, and receive it when I would; but
that then it wou'd be esteem'd as running Cash, and the Bank would give no
Interest for it; that I might buy Stock with it, and so it would lie in store
for me, but that then if I wanted to dispose of it, I must come up to Town to
Transfer it, and even it would be with some difficulty I should receive the half
yearly Dividend, unless I was here in Person, or had some Friend I could trust
with having the Stock in his Name to do it for me, and that would have the same
difficulty in it as before; and with that he look'd hard at me and smile'd a
little; at last, says he, why do you not get a head Steward, Madam, that may
take you and your Money together, and then you would have the trouble taken off
of your Hands? Ay, Sir, and the Money too it may be, said I, for truly I find
the hazard that way is as much as 'tis t' other way; but I remember, I said,
secretly to my self, I wish you would ask me the Question fairly, I would
consider very seriously on it before I said NO.
    He went on a good way with me, and I thought once or twice he was in
earnest, but to my real Affliction, I found at last he had a Wife; but when he
own'd he had a Wife he shook his Head, and said with some Concern, that indeed
he had a Wife, and no Wife: I began to think he had been in the Condition of my
late Lover, and that his Wife had been Lunatick, or some such thing: However, we
had not much more Discourse at that time, but he told me he was in too much
hurry of business then, but that if I would come home to his House after their
Business was over, he would consider what might be done for me, to put my
Affairs in a Posture of Security: I told him I would come, and desire'd to know
where he liv'd: He gave me a Direction in Writing, and, when he gave it me he
read it to me, and said, there 'tis, Madam, if you dare trust your self with me:
Yes Sir, said I, I believe I may venture to trust you with my self, for you have
a Wife you say, and I don't want a Husband; besides, I dare trust you with my
Money, which is all I have in the World, and if that were gone, I may trust my
self any where.
    He said some things in Jest that were very handsome and mannerly, and would
have pleas'd me very well if they had been in earnest; but that pass'd over, I
took the Directions, and appointed to be at his House at Seven o'Clock the same
Evening.
    When I came he made several Proposals for my placing my Money in the Bank,
in order to my having Interest for it; but still some difficulty or other came
in the way, which he objected as not safe; and I found such a sincere
disinterested Honesty in him, that I began to think I had certainly found the
honest Man I wanted; and that I could never put my self into better Hands; so I
told him with a great deal of frankness that I had never met with a Man or Woman
yet that I could trust, or in whom I could think my self safe, but that I saw he
was so disinterestedly concern'd for my safety, that I would freely trust him
with the management of that little I had, if he would accept to be Steward for a
poor Widow that could give him no Salary.
    He smile'd, and standing up, with great Respect saluted me; he told me he
could not but take it very kindly that I had so good an Opinion of him; that he
would not deceive me, that he would do any thing in his Power to serve me and
expect no Salary; but that he could not by any means accept of a Trust that
might bring him to be suspected of Self-interest, and that if I should die he
might have Disputes with my Executors, which he should be very loth to encumber
himself with.
    I told him if those were all his Objections I would soon remove them, and
convince him that there was not the least room for any difficulty; for that,
first as for suspecting him, if ever now was the time to suspect him, and not to
put the Trust into his Hands, and whenever I did suspect him, he could but throw
it up then and refuse to go on; Then as to Executors, I assure'd him I had no
Heirs, nor any Relations in England, and I would have neither Heirs or Executors
but himself, unless I should alter my Condition, and then his Trust and Trouble
should cease together, which however I had no prospect of yet; but I told him if
I died as I was, it should be all his own, and he would deserve it by being so
faithful to me, as I was satisfied he would be.
    He chang'd his Countenance at this Discourse, and ask'd me, how I came to
have so much good-will for him? and looking very much pleas'd, said, he might
very lawfully wish he was single for my sake; I smile'd and told him, that as he
was not, my Offer could have no design upon him, and to wish, was not to be
allow'd, 'twas Criminal to his Wife.
    He told me I was wrong; for, says he, as I said before, I have a Wife and no
Wife, and 'it would be no Sin to wish her hang'd; I know nothing of your
Circumstances that way, sir, said I; but it cannot be innocent to wish your Wife
dead; I tell you, says he again, she is a Wife and no Wife; you don't know what
I am, or what she is.
    That's true, said I, Sir, I don't know what you are, but I believe you to be
an honest Man, and that's the Cause of all my Confidence in you.
    Well, well, says he, and so I am, but I am something else too, Madam; for,
says he, to be plain with you, I am a Cuckold, and she is a Whore; he spoke it
in a kind of Jest, but it was with such an awkward smile, that I perceive'd it
stuck very close to him, and he look'd dismally when he said it.
    That alters the Case indeed, Sir, said I, as to that part you were speaking
of; but a Cuckold you know may be an honest Man, it does not alter that Case at
all; besides I think, said I, since your Wife is so dishonest to you, you are
too honest to her, to own her for your Wife; but that, said I, is what I have
nothing to do with. Nay, says he, I do think to clear my Hands of her, for to be
plain with you, Madam, added he, I am no contented Cuckold neither: On the other
hand, I assure you it provokes me to the highest Degree, but I can't help my
self; she that will be a Whore, will be a Whore.
    I wav'd the Discourse, and began to talk of my Business, but I found he
could not have done with it, so I let him alone, and he went on to tell me all
the Circumstances of his Case, too long to relate here; particularly, that
having been out of England some time before he came to the Post he was in, she
had had two Children in the mean time by an Officer of the Army; and that when
he came to England, and, upon her Submission, took her again, and maintain'd her
very well, yet she run away from him with a Linnen-Draper's Apprentice, robb'd
him of what she could come at, and continue'd to live from him still; so that
Madam, says he, she is a Whore not by Necessity, which is the common Bait, but
by Inclination, and for the sake of the Vice.
    Well, I pitied him, and wish'd him well rid of her, and still would have
talk'd of my Business, but it would not do; at last he looked steadily at me,
look you, Madam, says he, you came to ask Advice of me, and I will serve you as
faithfully as if you were my own Sister; but I must turn the Tables, since you
oblige me to do it, and are so friendly to me, and I think I must ask Advice of
you; tell me what must a poor abus'd fellow do with a Whore? What can I do to do
my self Justice upon her?
    Alas, Sir, says I, 'Tis a Case too nice for me to advise in, but it seems
she has run away from you, so you are rid of her fairly; what can you desire
more? Ay she is gone indeed, said he, but I am not clear of her for all that.
That's true, says I, she may indeed run you into Debt, but the Law has furnish'd
you with Methods to prevent that also, you may Cry her down, as they call it.
    No, no, says he, that is not the Case, I have taken care of all that; 'tis
not that part that I speak of, but I would be rid of her that I might marry
again.
    Well, sir, says I, then you must Divorce her; if you can prove what you say,
you may certainly get that done, and then you are free.
    That's very tedious and expensive, says he.
    Why, says I, if you can get any Woman you like, to take your Word, I suppose
your Wife would not dispute the Liberty with you that she takes herself.
    Ay, says he, but 'twou'd be hard to bring an honest Woman to do that; and
for the other sort, says he, I have had enough of her to meddle with any more
Whores.
    It occur'd to me presently, I would have taken your Word with all my Heart,
if you had but ask'd me the Question, but that was to my self; to him I reply'd,
why you shut the Door against any honest Woman accepting you, for you condemn
all that should venture upon you, and conclude, that a Woman that takes you now,
can't be honest.
    Why, says he, I wish you would satisfy me that an honest Woman would take
me, I'd venture it, and then turns short upon me, will you take me, Madam?
    That's not a fair Question, says I, after what you have said; however, least
you should'd think I wait only a Recantation of it, I shall answer you plainly, NO
not I; my Business is of another kind with you, and I did not expect you would
have turn'd my serious Application to you in my distracted Case, into a Comedy.
    Why, Madam, says he, my Case is as distracted as yours can be, and I stand
in as much need of Advice as you do, for I think if I have not Relief some
where, I shall be mad my self, and I know not what course to take, I protest to
you.
    Why sir, says I, 'tis easier to give Advice in your Case than mine; speak
then, says he, I beg of you, for now you encourage me.
    Why, says I, if your Case is so plain, you may be legally Divorc'd, and then
you may find honest Women enough to ask the Question of fairly, the Sex is not
so scarce that you can want a Wife.
    Well then, said he, I am in earnest, I'll take your Advice; but shall I ask
you one Question seriously before hand?
    Any Question, said I, but that you did before.
    No, that Answer will not do, said he, for in short, that is the Question I
shall ask.
    You may ask what Questions you please, but you have my Answer to that
already, said I; besides, Sir, said I, can you think so ill of me, as that I
wou'd give any Answer to such a Question before hand? Can any Woman alive
believe you in earnest, or think you design any thing but to banter her?
    Well, well, says he, I do not banter you, I am in earnest, consider of it.
    But, Sir, says I, a little gravely, I came to you about my own Business, I
beg of you to let me know, what you will advise me to do?
    I will be prepare'd, says he, against you come again.
    Nay, says I, you have forbid my coming any more.
    Why so? said he, and look'd a little Surprise'd.
    Because, said I, you can't expect I should visit you on the account you talk
of.
    Well, says he, you shall promise to come again however, and I will not say
any more of it till I have the Divorce, but I desire you'll prepare to be better
condition'd when that's done, for you shall be the Woman, or I will not be
Divorc'd at all: I owe it to your unlooked for kindness, if to nothing else, but
I have other Reasons too.
    He could not have said anything in the World that pleas'd me better;
however, I knew that the way to secure him was to stand off while the thing was
so remote, as it appear'd to be, and that it was time enough to accept of it
when he was able to perform it; so I said very respectfully to him, it was time
enough to consider of these things, when he was in a Condition to talk of them;
in the mean time I told him, I was going a great way from him, and he would find
Objects enough to please him better: We broke off here for the present, and he
made me promise him to come again the next Day, for my own Business, which after
some pressing I did; tho' had he seen farther into me, I wanted no pressing on
that Account.
    I came the next Evening accordingly, and brought my Maid with me, to let him
see that I kept a Maid: He would have had me let the Maid have staid, but I
would not, but order'd her aloud to come for me again about Nine a Clock, but he
forbid that, and told me he would see me safe Home, which I was not very well
pleased with, supposing he might do that to know where I liv'd, and enquire into
my Character, and Circumstances: However, I venture'd that, for all the People
there knew of me, was to my Advantage; and all the Character he had of me, was,
that I was a Woman of Fortune, and that I was a very modest sober Body; which
whether true or not in the Main, yet you may see how necessary it is, for all
Women who expect any thing in the World, to preserve the Character of their
Virtue, even when perhaps they may have sacrifiz'd the Thing itself.
    I found, and was not a little pleas'd with it, that he had provided a Supper
for me: I found also he liv'd very handsomely, and had a House very handsomely
furnish'd, and which I was rejoic'd at indeed, for I look'd upon it all as my
own.
    We had now a second Conference upon the Subject Matter of the last: He laid
his Business very Home indeed; he protested his Affection to me, and indeed I
had no room to doubt it; he declared that it began from the first Moment I
talk'd with him, and long before I had mentioned leaving my Effects with him;
'tis no matter when it began, thought I, if it will but hold, 'twill be well
enough: He then told me, how much the Offer I had made of trusting him with my
Effects had engage'd him; so I intended it should, thought I, but then I thought
you had been a single Man too: After we had Supp'd, I observe'd he press'd me
very hard to drink two or three Glasses of Wine, which however I decline'd, but
drank one Glass or two: He then told me he had a Proposal to make to me, which I
should promise him I would not take ill, if I should not grant it: I told him I
hop'd he would make no dishonourable Proposal to me, especially in his own
House, and that if it was such, I desire'd he would not mention it, that I might
not be obliged to offer any Resentment to him that did not become the Respect I
profess'd for him, and the Trust I had plac'd in him, in coming to this House;
and beg'd of him he would give me leave to go away, and accordingly began to put
on my Gloves, and prepare to be gone, tho' at the same time I no more intended
it, than he intended to let me.
    Well, he importun'd me not to talk of going; he assured me, he was very far
from offering any such thing to me that was dishonourable, and if I thought so,
he would choose to say no more of it.
    That part I did not relish at all; I told him, [I] was ready to hear
anything that he had to say, depending that he would say nothing unworthy of
himself, or unfit for me to hear; upon this, he told me his Proposal was this;
That I would marry him, tho' he had not yet obtain'd the Divorce from the Whore
his Wife; and to satisfy me that he meant honourably, he would promise not to
desire me to live with him, or go to Bed to him till the Divorce was obtain'd:
My Heart said Yes to this Offer at first Word, but it was necessary to play the
Hypocrite a little more with him; so I seem'd to decline the Motion with some
warmth as unfair, told him that such a Proposal could be of no Signification,
but to entangle us both in great Difficulties; for if he should not at last
obtain the Divorce, yet we could not dissolve the Marriage, neither could we
proceed in it; so that if he was disappointed in the Divorce, I left him to
consider what a Condition we should both be in.
    In short, I carried on the Argument against this so far, that I convince'd
him it was not a Proposal that had any Sense in it; then he went from it to
another, viz. that I would Sign and Seal a Contract with him, Conditioning to
marry him as soon as the Divorce was obtain'd, and to be void if he could not
get it.
    I told him that was more Rational than the other; but as this was the first
time that ever I could imagine him weak enough to be in earnest, I did not use
to say Yes at first asking, I would consider of it. I plaid with this Lover, as
an Angler does with a Trout: I found I had him fast on the Hook, so I jested
with his new Proposal, and put him off: I told him he knew little of me, and bad
him enquire about me; I let him also go Home with me to my Lodging, tho' I would
not ask him to go in, for I told him it was not Decent.
    In short, I venture'd to avoid Signing a Contract, and the Reason why I did
it, was because the Lady that had Invited me to go with her into Lancashire
insisted so possitively upon it, and promised me such great Fortunes, and fine
things there, that I was tempted to go and try; perhaps, said I, I may mend my
self very much, and then I made no scruple of quitting my honest Citizen, whom I
was not so much in Love with as not to leave him for a Richer.
    In a Word, I avoided a Contract; but told him I would go into the North,
that he would know where to write to me by the Business I had entrusted with
him, that I would give him a sufficient Pledge of my Respect for him, for I
would leave almost all I had in the World in his Hands; and I would thus far
give him my Word, that as soon as he had sued out the Divorce, if he would send
me an Account of it, I would come up to London, and that then we would talk
seriously of the Matter.
    It was a base Design I went with, that I must confess, tho' I was invited
thither with a Design much worse, as the Sequel will discover; well I went with
my Friend, as I call'd her, into Lancashire; all the way we went she caressed me
with the utmost appearance of a sincere undissembled Affection; treated me,
except my Coach-hire all the way; and her Brother brought a Gentleman's Coach to
Warrington to receive us, and we were carried from thence to Liverpool with as
much Ceremony as I could desire.
    We were also entertain'd at a Merchant's House in Liverpool three or four
Days very handsomely: I forbear to tell his Name, because of what follow'd; then
she told me she would carry me to an Uncle's House of hers where we should be
nobly entertain'd; and her Uncle, as she call'd him, sent a Coach and four
Horses for us, and we were carried near forty Miles I know not whither.
    We came however to a Gentleman's Seat, where was a numerous Family, a large
Park, extraordinary Company indeed, and where she was call'd Cousin; I told her
if she had resolve'd to bring me into such Company as this, she should have let
me have furnish'd my self with better clothes; the Ladies took Notice of that,
and told me very genteely, they did not value People in their own Country so
much by their clothes, as they did in London; that their Cousin had fully
inform'd them of my Quality, and that I did not want clothes to set me off; in
short, they entertain'd me not like what I was, but like what they thought I had
been, Namely, a Widow Lady of a great Fortune.
    The first Discovery I made here was, that the Family were all Roman
Catholicks, and the Cousin too; [however], nobody in the World could behave
better to me; and I had all the Civility shown that I could have had, if I had
been of their Opinion: The Truth is, I had not so much Principle of any kind, as
to be Nice in Point of Religion; and I presently learn'd to speak favourably of
the Romish Church; particularly I told them I saw little, but the Prejudice of
Education in all the Differences that were among Christians about Religion, and
if it had so happen'd that my Father had been a Roman Catholic, I doubted not
but I should have been as well pleas'd with their Religion as my own.
    This obliged them in the highest Degree, and as I was besieg'd Day and Night
with good Company, and pleasant Discourse, so I had two or three old Ladies that
lay at me upon the Subject of Religion too; I was so Complaisant that I made no
scruple to be present at their Mass, and to conform to all their Gestures as
they show'd me the Pattern, but I would not come too cheap; so that I only in
the main encouraged them to expect that I would turn Roman Catholic, if I was
instructed in the Catholic Doctrine, as they call'd it, and so the matter
rested.
    I slay'd here about six Weeks; and then my Conductor led me back to a
Country Village, about six Miles from Liverpool, where her Brother (as she
call'd him) came to visit me in his own Charriot, with two Footmen in a good
Livery; and the next thing was to make Love to me: As it happen'd to me, one
would think I could not have been cheated, and indeed I thought so my self,
having a safe Card at Home, which I resolvd not to quit unless I could mend my
self very much: However, in all appearance this Brother was a Match worth my
listning to, and the least his Estate was valu'd at, was a 1000l. a Year, but
the Sister said it was worth 1500l. a Year, and lay most of it in Ireland.
    I that was a great Fortune, and pass'd for such, was above being ask'd how
much my Estate was; and my false Friend taking it upon a foolish hearsay had
raise'd it from 500l. to 5000l. and by the time she came into the Country she
call'd it 15,000l. The Irishman, for such I understood him to be, was stark Mad
at this Bait: In short, he courted me, made me Presents, and run in Debt like a
mad Man for the Expenses of his Courtship: He had, to give him his due, the
Appearance of an extraordinary fine Gentleman; he was tall, well-shap'd, and had
an extraordinary Address; talk'd as naturally of his Park, and his Stables; or
his Horses, his Game-keepers, his Woods, his Tenants, and his Servants, as if he
had been in a Mansion house, and I had seen them all about me.
    He never so much as ask'd me about my Fortune or Estate; but assure'd me that
when we came to Dublin he would Joynture me in 600l. a Year in good Land; and
that he would enter into a Deed of Settlement, or Contract here, for the
Performance of it.
    This was such Language indeed as I had not been us'd to, and I was here
beaten out of all my Measures; I had a she Devil in my Bosom, every Hour telling
me how great her Brother liv'd: One time she would come for my Orders, how I
would have my Coach painted, and how lin'd; and another time what clothes my
Page should wear: In short, my Eyes were dazled, I had now lost my Power of
saying NO, and to cut the Story short, I consented to be Married; but to be more
private we were carried farther into the Country, and married by a Priest, which
I was assure'd would marry us as effectually as a Church of England Parson.
    I cannot say, but I had some Reflections in this Affair, upon the
dishonourable forsaking my faithful Citizen; who love'd me sincerely, and who was
endeavouring to quit himself of a scandalous Whore by whom he had been
barbarously us'd, and promise'd himself infinite Happiness in his new Choice;
which Choice was now giving up her self to another in a Manner almost as
Scandalous as hers could be.
    But the glittering show of a great Estate and of fine Things, which the
deceived Creature that was now my Deceiver represented every Hour to my
Imagination, hurried me away, and gave me no time to think of London, or of any
thing there, much less of the Obligation I had to a Person of infinitely more
real Merit than what was now before me.
    But the thing was done, I was now in the Arms of my new Spouse, who appear'd
still the same as before; great even to Magnificence, and nothing less than a
Thousand Pounds a Year could support the Ordinary Equipage he appear'd in.
    After we had been married about a Month, he began to talk of my going to
Westchester in order to embark for Ireland. However, he did not hurry me, for we
stay'd near three Weeks longer, and then he sent to Chester for a Coach to meet
us at the Black-Rock, as they call it, over against Liverpool: Thither we went
in a fine Boat they call a Pinnace with six Oars, his Servants, and Horses, and
Baggage going in a Ferry-Boat. He made his Excuse to me, that he had not
Acquaintance at Chester, but he would go before and get some handsome Appartment
for me at a private House; I ask'd him how long we should stay at Chester? he
said not at all, any longer than one Night or two, but he would immediately hire
a Coach to go to Holyhead; then I told him he should by no Means give himself
the trouble to get private Lodgings for one Night or two, for that Chester being
a great Place, I made no doubt but there would be very good Inns and
Accommodation enough; so we lodge'd at an Inn not far from the Cathedral, I
forgot what Sign it was at.
    Here my Spouse talking of my going to Ireland, ask'd me if I had no Affairs
to settle at London before we went off; I told him No, not of any great
Consequence, but what might be done as well by Letter from Dublin: Madam, says
he very respectfully, I suppose the greatest part of your Estate, which my
Sister tells me is most of it in Money in the Bank of England, lies secure
enough, but in case it require'd Transferring, or any way altering its Property,
it might be necessary to go up to London, and settle those Things before we went
over.
    I seem'd to look strange at it, and told him I knew not what he meant; that
I had no Effects in the Bank of England that I knew of; and I hope he could not
say that I had ever told him I had. No, he said, I had not told him so, but his
Sister had said the greatest part of my Estate lay there, and I only mention'd
it my Dear, said he, that if there was any Occasion to settle it, or order any
thing about it, we might not be oblige'd to the hazard and trouble of another
Voyage back again, for he added, that he did not care to venture me too much
upon the Sea.
    I was surpris'd at this talk, and began to consider what the meaning of it
must be! and it presently occur'd to me that my Friend, who call'd him Brother
had represented me in Colours which were not my due; and I thought that I would
know the bottom of it before I went out of England, and before I should put my
self into I knew not whose Hands, in a strange Country.
    Upon this I call'd his Sister into my Chamber the next Morning, and letting
her know the Discourse her Brother and I had been upon, I conjur'd her to tell
me, what she had said to him, and upon what Foot it was that she had made this
Marriage? She own'd that she had told him that I was a great Fortune, and said
that she was told so at London: Told so, says I warmly, did I ever tell you so?
No she said, it was true I never did tell her so, but I had said several times
that what I had, was in my own disposal: I did so, return'd I very quick, but I
never told you I had anything call'd a Fortune; No, that I had one Hundred
Pounds, or the Value of an Hundred Pounds in the World; and how did it consist
with my being a Fortune, said I, that I should come here into the North of
England with you, only upon the Account of living cheap? At these Words which I
spoke warm and high, my Husband came into the Room, and I desire'd him to come in
and sit down, for I had something of Moment to say before them both, which it
was absolutely necessary he should hear.
    He look'd a little disturb'd at the Assurance with which I seem'd to speak
it, and came and sat down by me, having first shut the Door; upon which I began,
for I was very much provok'd, and turning my self to him, I am afraid, says I,
my Dear, for I spoke with kindness on his side, that you have a very great Abuse
put upon you, and an Injury done you never to be repair'd in your marrying me,
which however as I have had no Hand in it, I desire I may be fairly acquited of
it, and that the Blame may lye where it ought and no where else, for I wash my
Hands of every part of it.
    What Injury can be done me, my Dear, says he, in marrying you? I hope it is
to my Honour and Advantage every way: I will soon explain it to you, says I, and
I fear there will be no Reason to think yourself well us'd, but I will convince
you, my Dear, says I again, that I have had no Hand in it.
    He look'd now scar'd and wild, and began, I believed, to suspect what
follow'd; however, looking towards me, and saying only, go on, he sat silent, as
if to hear what I had more to say; so I went on; I ask'd you last Night, said I,
speaking to him, if ever I made any boast to you of my Estate, or ever told you
I had any Estate in the Bank of England, or any where else, and you own'd I had
not, as is most true; and I desire you will tell me here, before your Sister, if
ever I gave you any Reason from me to think so, or that ever we had any
Discourse about it, and he own'd again I had not; but said, I had appeared
always as a Woman of Fortune, and he depended on it that I was so, and hoped he
was not deceived. I am not enquiring whether you have been deceived, said I, I
fear you have, and I too; but I am clearing my self from being concern'd in
deceiving you.
    I have been now asking your Sister if ever I told her of any Fortune or
Estate I had, or gave her any Particulars of it; and she owns I never did: And
pray Madam, said I, be so just to me, to charge me if you can, if ever I
pretended to you that I had an Estate; and why if I had, should I ever come down
into this Country with you on purpose to spare that little I had, and live
cheap? She could not deny one Word, but said she had been told in London that I
had a very great Fortune, and that it lay in the Bank of England.
    And now, Dear Sir, said I, turning my self to my new Spouse again, be so
just to me as to tell me who has abus'd both you and me so much, as to make you
believe I was a Fortune, and prompt you to court me to this Marriage? He could
not speak a Word, but pointed to her; and after some more pause, flew out in the
most furious Passion that ever I saw a Man in my Life; cursing her, and calling
her all the Whores and hard Names he could think of; and that she had ruin'd
him, declaring that she had told him I had Fifteen Thousand Pounds, and that she
was to have Five Hundred Pounds of him for procuring this Match for him: He then
added, directing his Speech to me, that she was none of his Sister, but had been
his Whore for two Years before, that she had had One Hundred Pounds of him in
part of this Bargain, and that he was utterly undone if things were as I said;
and in his raving he swore he would let her Heart's Blood out immediately, which
frightened her and me too; she cried, said she had been told so in the House
where I lodge'd, but this aggravated him more than before that she should put so
far upon him, and run things such a length upon no other Authority than a
hear-say; and then turning to me again, said very honestly, he was afraid we
were both undone; for to be plain, my dear, I have no Estate, says he, what
little I had, this Devil has made me run out in putting me into this Equipage;
she took the Opportunity of his being earnest in talking with me, and got out of
the Room, and I never saw her more.
    I was confounded now as much as he, and knew not what to say: I thought many
ways that I had the worst of it, but his saying he was undone, and that he had
no Estate neither put me into a meer Distraction; why, says I to him, this has
been a hellish Juggle, for we are married here upon the Foot of a double Fraud;
you are undone by the Disappointment it seems, and if I had had a Fortune I had
been cheated too, for you say you have nothing.
    You would indeed have been cheated, my Dear, says he, but you would not have
been undone, for Fifteen Thousand Pounds would have maintain'd us both very
handsomely in this Country; and I had resolve'd to have dedicated every Groat of
it to you; I would not have wrong'd you of a Shilling and the rest I would have
made up in my Affection to you, and Tenderness of you as long as I liv'd.
    This was very honest indeed, and I really believe he spoke as he intended,
and that he was a Man that was as well qualified to make me happy, as to his
Temper and Behaviour, as any Man ever was; but his having no Estate, and being
run into Debt on this ridiculous Account in the Country, made all the Prospect
dismal and dreadful, and I knew not what to say, or what to think.
    I told him it was very unhappy, that so much Love, and so much good Nature
as I discovered in him, should be thus precipitated into Misery; that I saw
nothing before us but Ruin, for as to me, it was my unhappiness, that what
little I had was not able to relieve us a Week, and with that I pull'd out a
Bank Bill of 20l. and Eleven Guineas, which I told him I had saved out of my
little Income; and that by the Account that Creature had given me of the way of
living in that Country, I expected it would maintain me three or four Years;
that if it was taken from me, I was left destitute, and he knew what the
Condition of a Woman must be, if she had no Money in her Pocket; however, I told
him, if he would take it, there it was.
    He told me with great concern, and I thought I saw Tears in his Eyes, that
he would not touch it, that he abhor'd the Thoughts of striping me, and making
me Miserable; that he had Fifty Guineas left, which was all he had in the World,
and he pull'd it out and threw it down on the Table, bidding me take it, tho' he
were to Starve for want of it.
    I returned with the same concern for him, that I could not bear to hear him
talk so; that on the contrary, if he could propose any probable Method of
living, I would do any thing that became me, and that I would live as narrow as
he could desire.
    He beg'd of me to talk no more at that rate, for it would make him
Distracted; he said he was bred a Gentleman, tho' he was reduce'd to a low
Fortune, and that there was but one way left which he could think of, and that
would not do, unless I cou'd answer him one Question, which, however, he said he
would not press me to; I told him I would answer it honestly, whether it would
be to his Satisfaction or no, that I could not tell.
    Why then, my Dear, tell me plainly, says he, will the little you have keep
us together in any Figure, or in any Station or Place, or will it not?
    It was my Happiness that I had not discover'd my self, or my Circumstances
at all; No, not so much as my Name, and seeing there was nothing to be expected
from him, however good humour'd, and however honest he seem'd to be, but to live
on what I knew would soon be wasted, I resolve'd to conceal every thing but the
Bank-Bill, and Eleven Guineas, and I would have been very glad to have lost
that, and have been set down where he took me up: I had indeed another Bank-Bill
about me of 30l., which was the whole of what I brought with me, as well to
subsist on in the Country, as not knowing what might offer; because this
Creature, the go-between that had thus betray'd us both, had made me believe
strange things of marrying to my Advantage, and I was not willing to be without
Money whatever might happen. This Bill I conceal'd, and that made me the freer
of the rest, in Consideration of his Circumstances, for I really pitied him
heartily.
    But to return to this Question, I told him, I never willingly deceive'd him,
and I never would: I was very sorry to tell him that the little I had would not
subsist us; that it was not sufficient to subsist me alone in the South Country,
and that this was the Reason that made me put my self into the Hands of that
Woman who call'd him Brother, she having assured me that I might board very
handsomely at a Town call'd Manchester, where I had not yet been, for about six
Pounds a Year, and my whole Income not being above 15l. a Year, I thought I
might live easy upon it, and wait for better things.
    He shook his Head, and remain'd silent, and a very melancholy Evening we
had; however we supp'd together, and lay together that Night, and when we had
almost supp'd he look'd a little better, and more cheerful, and call'd for a
Bottle of Wine; Come my Dear, says he, tho' the Case is bad, it is to no Purpose
to be dejected, Come, be as easy as you can, I will endeavour to find out some
way or other to live; if you can but subsist your self, that is better than
nothing, I must try the World again; a Man ought to think like a Man: To be
discouraged, is to yield to the Misfortune; with this he fill'd a Glass, and
drank to me, holding my Hand all the while the Wine went down, and protesting
his main concern was for me.
    It was really a true gallant Spirit he was of, and it was the more Grievous
to me: 'Tis something of Relief even to be undone by a man of Honour, rather
than by a Scoundrel; but here the greatest Disappointment was on his side, for
he had really spent a great deal of Money, and it was very remarkable on what
poor Terms she proceeded; first, the baseness of the Creature herself is to be
observe'd, who for the getting One Hundred Pounds herself, could be content to
let him spend Three or Four more, tho' perhaps it was all he had in the World,
and more than all; when she had not the least Ground more than a little
Tea-Table Chat, to say that I had any Estate, or was a Fortune, or the like: It
is true the design of deluding a Woman of Fortune, if I had been so, was base
enough; the putting the Face of great Things upon poor Circumstances was a
Fraud, and bad enough; but the Case a little differ'd too, and that in his
Favour, for he was not a Rake that made a Trade to delude Women, and as some
have done, get six or seven Fortunes after one another, and then rifle and run
away from them; but he was already a Gentleman, unfortunate and low, but had
liv'd well; and tho' if I had had a Fortune, I should have been enrag'd at the
Slut for betraying me; yet really for the Man, a Fortune would not have been ill
bestow'd on him, for he was a lovely Person indeed; of generous Principles, good
Sense, and of abundance of good Humour.
    We had a great deal of close Conversation that Night, for we neither of us
slept much; he was as Penitent, for having put all those Cheats upon me, as if
it had been Fellony, and that he was going to Execution; he offered me again
every Shilling of the Money he had about him, and said, he would go into the
Army and seek for more.
    I ask'd him why he would be so unkind to carry me into Ireland, when I might
suppose he could not have subsisted me there? He took me in his Arms, My Dear,
said he, I never design'd to go to Ireland at all, much less to have carried you
thither; but came hither to be out of the Observation of the People, who had
heard what I pretended to, and that no Body might ask me for Money before I was
furnish'd to supply them.
    But where then, said I, were we to have gone next?
    Why my Dear, said he, I'll confess the whole Scheme to you, as I had laid
it; I purposed here to ask you something about your Estate, as you see I did,
and when you, as I expected you would, had enter'd into some Account of the
Particulars, I would have made an Excuse to have put off our Voyage to Ireland'
for some time, and so have gone for London.
    Then my Dear, says he, I resolve'd to have confess'd all the Circumstances of
my own Affairs to you, and let you know I had indeed made use of these Artifices
to obtain your Consent to marry me, but had now nothing to do but to ask your
Pardon, and to tell you how abundantly I would endeavour to make you forget what
was past, by the Felicity of the Days to come.
    Truly, said I to him, I find you would soon have conquer'd me; and it is my
Affliction now, that I am not in a Condition to let you see how easily I should
have been reconcil'd to you, and have pass'd by all the Tricks you had put upon
me, in Recompence of so much good Humour; but my Dear, said I, what can we do
now? We are both undone, and what better are we for our being reconcil'd, seeing
we have nothing to live on.
    We propos'd a great many things, but nothing could offer, where there was
nothing to begin with: He beg'd me at last to talk no more of it, for he said I
would break his Heart; so we talk'd of other things a little, till at last he
took a Husband's leave of me, and so went to Sleep.
    He rose before me in the Morning, and indeed having lain awake almost all
Night, I was very sleepy, and lay till near Eleven o'Clock, in this time he took
his Horses, and three Servants, and all his Linnen and Baggage, and away he
went, leaving a short, but moving Letter for me on the Table, as follows:
 
        My Dear,
            I am a Dog; I have abus'd you; but I have been drawn in to do it by
        a base Creature, contrary to my Principle, and the general Practice of
        my Life: Forgive me, my Dear! I ask you Pardon with the greatest
        Sincerity; I am the most miserable of Men, in having deluded you: I have
        been so happy to Possess you, and am now so wretched as to be force'd to
        fly from you: Forgive me, myDear, once more I say forgive me! I am not
        able to see you ruin'd by me, and my self unable to support you: Our
        Marriage is nothing, I shall never be able to see you again; I here
        discharge you from it; if you can marry to your Advantage do not decline
        it on my Account; I here swear to you on my Faith, and on the Word of a
        Man of Honour, I will never disturb your Repose if I should know of it,
        which however is not likely: On the other hand, if you should not marry,
        and if good Fortune should befall me, it shall be all yours where ever
        you are.
            I have put some of the Stock of Money I have left into your Pocket;
        take Places for your self and your Maid in the Stage Coach, and go for
        London; I hope it will bear your Charges thither, without breaking into
        your own: Again I sincerely ask your Pardon, and will do so, as often as
        I shall ever think of you.
                                                       Adieu, my Dear, for ever,
                                                 I am yours most Affectionately,
                                                                            J.E.
 
Nothing that ever befell me in my Life, sunk so deep into my Heart as this
Farewel: I reproach'd him a Thousand times in my Thoughts for leaving me, for I
would have gone with him thro' the World, if I had beg'd my Bread. I felt in my
Pocket, and there I found ten Guineas, his Gold Watch, and two little Rings, one
a small Diamond Ring, worth only about Six Pound, and the other a plain Gold
Ring.
    I sat down and look'd upon these Things two Hours together, and scarce spoke
a Word, till my Maid interrupted me, by telling me my Dinner was ready: I eat
but little, and after Dinner I fell into a violent Fit of Crying, every now and
then, calling him by his Name, which was James; O Jemy! said I, come back, come
back, I'll give you all I have; I'll beg, I'll starve with you: And thus I run
Raving about the Room several times, and then sat down between whiles, and then
walking about again, call'd upon him to come back, and then cry'd again; and
thus I pass'd the Afternoon, till about seven o'Clock, when it was near Dusk in
the Evening, being August, when to my unspeakable Surprise he comes back into
the Inn, and comes directly up into my Chamber.
    I was in the greatest Confusion imaginable, and so was he too: I could not
imagine what should be the Occasion of it; and began to be at odds with my self
whether to be glad or sorry; but my Affection byass'd all the rest, and it was
impossible to conceal my Joy, which was too great for Smiles, for it burst out
into Tears. He was no sooner enter'd the Room, but he run to me and took me in
his Arms, holding me fast and almost stopping my Breath with his Kisses, but
spoke not a Word; at length I began, my Dear, said I, How could you go away from
me? To which he gave no Answer, for it was impossible for him to speak.
    When our Extasies were a little over, he told me he was gone above 15 Miles,
but it was not in his Power to go any farther, without coming back to see me
again, and to take his leave of me once more.
    I told him how I had pass'd my time, and how loud I had call'd him to come
back again; he told me he heard me very plain upon Delamere Forest, at a Place
about 12 Miles off: I smile'd; Nay says he, Do not think I am in Jest, for if
ever I heard your Voice in my Life, I heard you call me aloud, and sometimes I
thought I saw you running after me; Why said I, what did I say? for I had not
nam'd the Words to him, you call'd aloud, says he, and said, O Jemy! O Jemy!
come back, come back.
    I laugh'd at him, my Dear, says he, do not Laugh, for depend upon it, I
heard your Voice as plain as you hear mine now; if you please, I'll go before a
Magistrate and make Oath of it; I then began to be amaz'd and Surprise'd, and
indeed frighted, and told him what I had really done, and how I had call'd after
him, as above. When we had amus'd ourselves a while about this, I said to him,
well, you shall go away from me no more, I'll go all over the World with you
rather: He told me, it would be a very difficult thing for him to leave me, but
since it must be, he hoped I would make it as easy to me as I could; but as for
him, it would be his Destruction, that he foresaw.
    However he told me that he had consider'd he had left me to Travel to London
alone, which was a long Journey; and that as he might as well go that way, as
any way else, he was resolve'd to see me thither, or near it; and if he did go
away then without taking his leave, I should not take it ill of him, and this he
made me promise.
    He told me how he had dismiss'd his three Servants, sold their Horses, and
sent the Fellows away to seek their Fortunes, and all in a little time, at a
Town on the Road, I know not where; and, says he, it cost me some Tears all
alone by my self, to think how much happier they were than their Master, for
they could go to the next Gentleman's House to see for a Service, whereas, said
he, I knew not whither to go, or what to do with my self.
    I told him, I was so completely miserable in parting with him, that I could
not be worse; and that now he was come again, I would not go from him, if he
would take me with him, let him go whither he would; and in the mean time I
agreed that we would go together to London; but I could not be brought to
consent he should go away at last, and not take his leave of me; but told him
Jesting, that if he did, I would call him back again as loud as I did before;
Then I pull'd out his Watch and gave it him back, and his two Rings, and his Ten
Guineas; but he would not take them, which made me very much suspect that he
resolve'd to go off upon the Road, and leave me.
    The truth is, the Circumstances he was in, the passionate Expressions of his
Letter, the kind Gentlemanly Treatment I had from him in all the Affair, with
the Concern he show'd for me in it, his manner of Parting with that large Share
which he gave me of his little Stock left, all these had join'd to make such
Impressions on me, that I could not bear the Thoughts of parting with him.
    Two Days after this we quitted Chester, I in the Stage Coach, and he on
Horseback; I dismiss'd my Maid at Chester; he was very much against my being
without a Maid, but she being hired in the Country, keeping no Servant at London
: I told him it would have been barbarous to have taken the poor Wench, and have
turn'd her away as soon as I came to Town; and it would also have been a
needless Charge on the Road, so I satisfy'd him, and he was easy on that Score.
    He came with me as far as Dunstable, within 30 Miles of London, and then he
told me Fate and his own Misfortunes oblige'd him to leave me, and that it was
not Convenient for him to go to London, for Reasons, which it was of no value to
me to know, and I saw him preparing to go. The Stage Coach we were in, did not
usually stop at Dunstable, but I desiring it for a Quarter of an Hour, they were
content to stand at an Inn-Door a while, and we went into the House.
    Being in the Inn, I told him I had but one Favour more to ask him, and that
was, that since he could not go any farther, he would give me leave to stay a
Week or two in the Town with him, that we might in that time think of something
to prevent such a ruinous thing to us both, as a final Separation would be; and
that I had something of Moment to offer to him, which perhaps he might find
Practicable to our Advantage.
    This was too reasonable a Proposal to be denied, so he call'd the Landlady
of the House, and told her, his Wife was taken ill, and so ill that she cou'd
not think of going any farther in the Stage Coach, which had tir'd her almost to
Death, and ask'd if she cou'd not get us a Lodging for two or three Days in a
private House where I might rest me a little, for the Journey had been too much
for me? The Landlady, a good sort of a Woman, well bred, and very obliging, came
immediately to see me; told me, she had two or three very good Rooms in a part
of the House quite out of the Noise, and if I saw them, she did not doubt but I
would like them, and I should have one of her Maids, that should do nothing else
but wait on me; this was so very kind, that I could not but accept of it; so I
went to look on the Rooms, and lik'd them very well, and indeed they were
extraordinarily Furnish'd, and very pleasant Lodgings; so we paid the Stage
Coach, took out our Baggage, and resolve'd to slay here a while.
    Here I told him, I would live with him now till all my Money was spent, but
would not let him spend a Shilling of his own: We had some kind squabble about
that, but I told him it was the last time I was like to enjoy his Company, and I
desire'd he would let me be Master in that thing only, and he should govern in
every thing else so he acquiesc'd.
    Here one Evening taking a Walk into the Fields, I told him, I would now make
the Proposal to him I had told him of; accordingly I related to him how I had
liv'd in Virginia, that I had a Mother, I believe'd, was alive there still, tho'
my Husband was dead some Years; I told him, that had not my Effects miscarry'd,
which by the way I magnify'd pretty much, I might have been Fortune good enough
to him to have kept us from being parted in this manner: Then I enter'd into the
manner of Peoples settling in those Countries, how they had a quantity of Land
given them by the Constitution of the Place; and if not, that it might be
purchased at so easy a Rate that it was not worth naming.
    I then gave him a full and distinct account of the nature of Planting, how
with carrying over but two or three Hundred Pounds value in English Goods, with
some Servants and Tools, a Man of Application wou'd presently lay a Foundation
for a Family, and in a few Years would raise an Estate.
    I let him into the nature of the Product of the Earth, how the Ground was
Cur'd and Prepar'd, and what the usual Increase of it was; and demonstrated to
him, that in a very few Years, with such a Beginning, we should be as certain of
being Rich, as we were now certain of being Poor.
    He was Surprise'd at my Discourse; for we made it the whole Subject of our
Conversation for near a Week together, in which time I laid it down in black and
white, as we say, that it was morally impossible, with a supposition of any
reasonable good Conduct, but that we must thrive there and do very well.
    Then I told him what measures I would take to raise such a Sum as 300l. or
thereabouts; and I argued with him how good a Method it would be to put an end
to our Misfortunes, and restore our Circumstances in the World, to what we had
both expected; and I added, that after seven Years, we might be in a Posture to
leave our Plantation in good Hands, and come over again and receive the Income
of it, and live here and enjoy it; and I gave him Examples of some that had done
so, and liv'd now in very good Figure in London.
    In short, I press'd him so to it, that he almost agreed to it, but still
something or other broke it off; till at last he turn'd the Tables, and began to
talk almost to the same purpose of Ireland.
    He told me that a Man that could confine himself to a Country Life, and that
cou'd but find Stock to enter upon any Land, should have Farms there for 50l. a
Year, as good as were let here for 200l. a Year; that the Produce was such, and
so Rich the Land, that if much was not laid up, we were sure to live as
handsomely upon it as a Gentleman of 3000l. a Year could do in England; and that
he had laid a Scheme to leave me in London, and go over and try; and if he found
he could lay a handsome Foundation of living suitable to the Respect he had for
me, as he doubted not he should do, he would come over and fetch me.
    I was dreadfully afraid that upon such a Proposal he would have taken me at
my Word, viz. to turn my little Income into Money, and let him carry it over
into Ireland and try his Experiment with it; but he was too just to desire it,
or to have accepted it if I had offer'd it; and he anticipated me in that, for
he added, that he would go and try his Fortune that way, and if he found he
cou'd do any thing at it to live, then by adding mine to it when I went over, we
should live like our selves; but that he would not hazard a Shilling of mine
till he had made the Experiment with a little, and he assure'd me that if he
found nothing to be done in Ireland, he would then come to me and join in my
Project for Virginia.
    He was so earnest upon his Project being to be try'd first, that I cou'd not
withstand him; however, he promise'd to let me hear from him in a very little
time after his arriving there, to let me know whether his prospect answer'd his
Design, that if there was not a probability of Success, I might take the
Occasion to prepare for our other Voyage, and then, he assure'd me, he would go
with me to America with all his Heart.
    I could bring him to nothing farther than this, and which entertain'd us
near a Month, during which I enjoy'd his Company, which was the most
entertaining that ever I met with in my life before. In this time he let me into
part of the Story of his own Life, which was indeed surprising, and full of an
infinite Variety, sufficient to fill up a much brighter History for its
Adventures and Incidents, than any I ever saw in Print: But I shall have
occasion to say more of him hereafter.
    We parted at last, tho' with the utmost reluctance on my side, and indeed he
took his leave very unwillingly too, but Necessity oblige'd him, for his Reasons
were very good, why he would not come to London, as I understood more fully
afterwards.
    I gave him a Direction how to write to me, tho' still I reserve'd the grand
Secret, which was not to let him ever know my true Name, who I was, or where to
be found; he likewise let me know how to write a Letter to him, so that he said
he would be sure to receive it.
    I came to London the next Day after we parted, but did not go directly to my
old Lodgings; but for another nameless Reason took a private Lodging in St.
John's-street, or as it is vulgarly call'd St. Jones's near Clarkenwell; and
here being perfectly alone, I had leisure to sit down and reflect seriously upon
the last seven Months Ramble I had made, for I had been abroad no less; the
pleasant Hours I had with my last Husband I look'd back on with an infinite deal
of Pleasure; but that Pleasure was very much lessen'd, when I found some time
after that I was really with Child.
    This was a perplexing thing because of the Difficulty which was before me,
where I should get leave to Lye-In; it being one of the nicest things in the
World at that time of Day, for a Woman that was a Stranger, and had no Friends,
to be entertain'd in that Circumstance without Security, which I had not,
neither could I procure any.
    I had taken care all this while to preserve a Correspondence with my Friend
at the Bank, or rather he took care to Correspond with me, for he wrote to me
once a Week; and tho' I had not spent my Money so fast as to want any from him,
yet I often wrote also to let him know I was alive; I had left Directions in
Lancashire, so that I had these Letters convey'd to me; and during my Recess at
St. Jones's I received a very obliging Letter from him, assuring me that his
Process for a Divorce went on with Success, tho' he met with some Difficulties
in it that he did not expect.
    I was not displeas'd with the News, that his Process was more tedious than
he expected; for tho' I was in no condition to have had him yet, not being so
foolish to marry him when I knew my self to be with Child by another Man, as
some I know have venture'd to do; yet I was not willing to lose him, and in a
word, resolve'd to have him if he continue'd in the same mind, as soon as I was up
again; for I saw apparently I should hear no more from my other Husband; and as
he had all along press'd me to Marry, and had assure'd me he would not be at all
disgusted at it, or ever offer to claim me again, so I made no scruple to
resolve to do it if I could, and if my other Friend stood to his Bargain; and I
had a great deal of Reason to be assure'd that he would, by the Letters he wrote
to me, which were the kindest and most obliging that could be.
    I now grew Big, and the people where I lodge'd perceive'd it, and began to
take notice of it to me, and as far as Civility would allow, intimated that I
must think of removing; this put me to extreme perplexity, and I grew very
melancholy, for indeed I knew not what Course to take, I had Money, but no
Friends, and was like now to have a Child upon my Hands to keep, which was a
difficulty I had never had upon me yet, as my Story hitherto makes appear.
    In the course of this Affair I fell very ill, and my Melancholly really
encreas'd my Distemper; my Illness prov'd at length to be only an Ague, but my
Apprehensions were really that I should Miscarry; I should not say
Apprehensions, for indeed I would have been glad to miscarry, but I cou'd never
entertain so much as a thought of taking any thing to make me Miscarry, I
abhorr'd, I say, so much as the thought of it.
    However, speaking of it, the Gentlewoman who kept the House propos'd to me
to send for a Midwife; I scrupled it at first, but after some time consented,
but told her I had no Acquaintance with any Midwife, and so left it to her.
    It seems the Mistress of the House was not so great a Stranger to such Cases
as mine was, as I thought at first she had been, as will appear presently, and
she sent for a Midwife of the right sort, that is to say, the right sort for me.
    The Woman appear'd to be an experienced Woman in her Business, I mean as a
Midwife, but she had another Calling too, in which she was as expert as most
Women, if not more: My Landlady had told her I was very Melancholly, and that
she believe'd that had done me harm; and once, before me, said to her, Mrs. B
---, I believe this Lady's Trouble is of a kind that is pretty much in your way,
and therefore if you can do anything for her, pray do, for she is a very civil
Gentlewoman, and so she went out of the Room.
    I really did not understand her, but my Mother Midnight began very seriously
to explain what she meant, as soon as she was gone: Madam, says she, you seem
not to understand what your Landlady means, and when you do, you need not let
her know at all that you do so.
    She means that you are under some Circumstances that may render your
Lying-In difficult to you, and that you are not willing to be expos'd; I need
say no more, but to tell you, that if you think fit to communicate so much of
your Case to me, as is necessary, for I do not desire to pry into those things,
I perhaps may be in a Condition to assist you, and to make you easy, and remove
all your dull Thoughts upon that Subject.
    Every word this Creature said was a Cordial to me, and put new Life and new
Spirit into my very Heart; my Blood began to circulate immediately, and I was
quite another Body; I eat my Victuals again, and grew better presently after it:
She said a great deal more to the same purpose, and then having press'd me to be
free with her, and promise'd in the solemnest manner to be secret, she stop'd a
little, as if waiting to see what Impression it made on me, and what I would
say.
    I was too sensible of the want I was in of such a Woman, not to accept her
Offer; I told her my Case was partly as she guess'd, and partly not, for I was
really married, and had a Husband, tho' he was so remote at that time, as that
he cou'd not appear publicly.
    She took me short, and told me, that was none of her Business, all the
Ladies that came under her Care were married Women to her; every Woman, says she
, that is with Child has a Father for it, and whether that Father was a Husband
or no Husband, was no Business of hers; her Business was to assist me in my
present Circumstances, whether I had a Husband or no; for, Madam, says she, to
have a Husband that cannot appear, is to have no Husband, and therefore whether
you are a Wife or a Mistress is all one to me.
    I found presently, that whether I was a Whore or a Wife, I was to pass for a
Whore here, so I let that go; I told her, it was true as she said, but that
however, if I must tell her my Case, I must tell it her as it was: So I related
it as a short as I could, and I concluded it to her: I trouble you with this,
Madam, said, I, not that, as you said before, it is much to the purpose in your
affair; but this is to the purpose, Namely, that I am not in any pain about
being seen, or being conceal'd, for 'tis perfectly indifferent to me: but my
difficulty is, that I have no Acquaintance in this part of the Nation.
    I understand you, Madam, says she, you have no Security to bring to prevent
the Parish Impertinences usual in such Cases; and perhaps, says she, do not know
very well how to dispose of the Child when it comes; the last, says I, is not so
much my Concern as the first: Well, Madam, answers the Midwife, dare you put
your self into my Hands? I live in such a place, tho' I do not enquire after
you, you may enquire after me, my Name is B ---, I live in such a Street, naming
the Street, at the Sign of the Cradle, my Profession is a Midwife, and I have
many Ladies that come to my House to Lye-In; I have given Security to the Parish
in General to secure them from any Charge, from what shall come into the World
under my Roof; I have but one Question to ask in the whole Affair, Madam, says
she, and if that be answer'd, you shall be entirely easy of the rest.
    I presently understood what she meant, and told her, Madam, I believe I
understand you; I thank God, tho' I want Friends in this Part of the World, I do
not want Money, so far as may be Necessary, tho' I do not abound in that neither
: This I added, because I would not make her expect great things; well Madam,
says she, that is the thing indeed, without which nothing can be done in these
Cases; and yet, says she, you shall see that I will not impose upon you, or
offer anything that is unkind to you, and you shall know every thing before
hand, that you may suit yourself to the Occasion, and be either costly or
sparing as you see fit.
    I told her, she seem'd to be so perfectly sensible of my Condition, that I
had nothing to ask of her but this, that as I had Money sufficient, but not a
great Quantity, she would order it so, that I might be at as little superfluous
Charge as possible.
    She reply'd, that she should bring in an Account of the Expenses of it, in
two or three Shapes, I should choose as I pleas'd; and I desire'd her to do so.
    The next Day she brought it, and the Copy of her three Bills was as follows.
 
                                                                        l. s. d.
1. For three Months Lodging in her House, including my Dyet at 10s. a Week
                                                                       06. 00. 0
2. For a Nurse for the Month, and Use of Child-bed Linnen
                                                                       01. 10. 0
3. For a Minister to Christen the Child, and to the Godfathers and Clark
                                                                       01. 10. 0
4. For a Supper at the Christening if I had five Friends at it
                                                                       01. 00. 0
For her Fees as a Midwife, and the taking off the Trouble of the Parish
                                                                       03. 03. 0
To her Maid Servant attending
                                                                       00. 10. 0
                                                                       13. 13. 0
 
This was the first Bill, the Second was in the same Terms.
 
                                                                        l. s. d.
1. For three Months Lodging and Dyet &amp;c., at 20s. per Week
                                                                       12. 00. 0
2. For a Nurse for the Month, and the Use of Linnen and Lace
                                                                       02. 10. 0
3. For the Minister to Christen the Child, &amp;c. as above
                                                                       02. 00. 0
4. For a Supper, and for Sweatmeats
                                                                       03. 03. 0
For her Fees, as above
                                                                       05. 05. 0
For a Servant-Maid
                                                                       01. 00. 0
                                                                       26. 18. 0
 
This was the second rate Bill, the third, she said, was for a degree Higher, and
when the Father, or Friends appeared.
 
                                                                        l. s. d.
1. For three Months Lodging and Diet, having two Rooms and a Garret for a
Servant
                                                                       30. 00. 0
2. For a Nurse for the Month, and the finest Suit of Child-bed Linnen
                                                                       04. 04. 0
3. For the Minister to Christen the Child
                                                                       02. 10. 0
4. For a Supper, the Gentleman to send in the Wine
                                                                       06. 00. 0
For my Fees, &amp;c.
                                                                       10. 10. 0
The Maid besides their own Maid only
                                                                       00. 10. 0
                                                                       53. 14. 0
 
I look'd upon all the three Bills, and smile'd, and told her, I did not see but
that she was very reasonable in her Demands, and things consider'd, and I did
not doubt but her Accommodations were good.
    She told me, I should be a Judge of that, when I saw them: I told her, I was
sorry to tell her that I fear'd I must be her lowest rated Customer, and perhaps
Madam, said I, you will make me the less Wellcome upon that Account. No, not at
all, said she, for where I have One of the third Sort, I have Two of the Second,
and Four of the First, and I get as much by them in Proportion, as by any; but
if you doubt my Care of you, I will allow any Friend you have to see if you are
well waited on, or no.
    Then she explain'd the Particulars of her Bill; in the first Place, Madam,
said she, I would have you observe, that here is three Months keeping you at but
10s. a Week, I undertake to say you will not complain of my Table: I suppose,
says she, you do not live Cheaper where you are now; No, indeed, said I, nor so
Cheap, for I give six Shillings per Week for my Chamber, and find my own Dyet,
which costs me a great deal more.
    Then Madam, says she, if the Child should not live, as it sometimes happens,
there is the Minister's Article saved; and if you have no Friends to come, you
may save the Expense of a Supper; so that take those Articles out, Madam, says
she, your Lying-In will not cost you above 5l. 3s. more than your ordinary
Charge of Living.
    This was the most reasonable thing that I ever heard of; so I smile'd, and
told her I would come and be a Customer; but I told her also, that as I had two
Months, and more to go, I might perhaps be obliged to stay longer with her than
three Months, and desire'd to know if she would not be oblige'd to remove me
before it was proper; No, she said, her House was large, and besides, she never
put any Body to remove, that had Lain-In, 'till they were willing to go; and if
she had more Ladies offer'd, she was not so ill belove'd among her Neighbours,
but she could provide Accommodation for Twenty, if there was Occasion.
    I found she was an eminent Lady in her way, and in short, I agreed to put my
self into her Hands: She then talk'd of other things, look'd about into my
Accommodations, where I was, found fault with my wanting Attendance, and
Conveniences, and that I should not be us'd so at her House: I told her, I was
shy of speaking, for the Woman of the House look'd stranger, or at least I
thought so, since I had been Ill, because I was with Child; and I was afraid she
would put some Affront or other upon me, supposing that I had been able to give
but a slight Account of my self.
    O dear, says she, her Ladyship is no stranger to these things; she has try'd
to entertain Ladies in your Condition, but could not secure the Parish; and
besides, such a nice Lady as you take her to be; however, since you are agoing
you shall not meddle with her, but I'll see you are a little better look'd after
while you are here, and it shall not cost you the more neither.
    I did not understand her: however, I thank'd her, so we parted; the next
Morning she sent me a Chicken roasted and hot, and a Bottle of Sherry, and
ordered the Maid to tell me, that she was to wait on me every Day as long as I
staid there.
    This was surprizingly good and kind, and I accepted it very willingly; At
Night she sent to me again, to know if I wanted any thing, and to order the Maid
to come to her in the Morning for Dinner; the Maid had Orders to make me some
Chocolate in the Morning before she came away, and at Noon she brought me the
Sweetbread of a Breast of Veal whole, and a Dish of Soup for my Dinner, and
after this manner she nurs'd me up at a distance, so that I was mightily well
pleased, and quickly well, for indeed my Dejections before were the principal
Part of my Illness.
    I expected, as is usually the Case among such People, that the Servant she
sent me would have been some impudent brazen Wench of Drury Lane Breeding, and I
was very uneasy upon that Account, so I would not let her lye in the House the
first Night, but had my Eyes about me as narrowly as if she had been a public
Thief.
    My Gentlewoman guess'd presently what was the matter, and sent her back with
a short Note, that I might depend upon the honesty of her Maid; that she would
be answerable for her upon all Accounts; and that she took no Servants without
very good Security: I was then perfectly easy, and indeed the Maid's Behaviour
spoke for it self, for a modester, quieter, soberer Girl never came into any
Body's Family, and I found her so afterwards.
    As soon as I was well enough to go Abroad, I went with the Maid to see the
House, and to see the Appartment I was to have; and every thing was so handsome
and so clean, that, in short, I had nothing to say, but was wonderfully pleased
with what I had met with, which considering the melancholy Circumstances I was
in, was beyond what I looked for.
    It might be expected that I should give some Account of the Nature of the
wicked Practices of this Woman, in whose Hands I was now fallen; but it would be
but too much Encouragement to the Vice, to let the World see what easy Measures
were here taken to rid the Women's Burthen of a Child clandestinely gotten: This
grave Matron had several Sorts of Practice, and this was one, that if a Child
was born, tho' not in her House, for she had the Occasion to be call'd to many
private Labours, she had People always ready, who for a Piece of Money would
take the Child off their Hands, and off from the Hands of the Parish too; and
those Children, as she said, were honestly taken Care of: What should become of
them all, considering so many, as by her Account she was concern'd with, I
cannot conceive.
    I had many times Discourses upon that Subject with her; but she was full of
this Argument, that she save'd the Life of many an Innocent Lamb, as she call'd
them, which would perhaps have been Murder'd; and of many a Woman, who made
Desperate by the Misfortune, would otherwise be tempted to Destroy their
Children: I granted her that this was true, and a very commendable thing,
provided the poor Children fell into good Hands afterwards, and were not abus'd
and neglected by the Nurses; she answered, that she always took care of that,
and had no Nurses in her Business, but what were very Good People, and such as
might be depended upon.
    I could say nothing to the contrary, and so was oblige'd to say, Madam I do
not question but you do your Part, but what those People do is the main Question
, and she stop'd my Mouth again with saying she took the utmost care about it.
    The only thing I found in all her Conversation on these Subjects, that gave
me any distaste, was, that one time in Discoursing about my being so far gone
with Child, she said something that look'd as if she could help me off with my
Burthen sooner, if I was willing; or in English, that she could give me
something to make me Miscarry, if I had a desire to put an end to my Troubles
that way; but I soon let her see that I abhor'd the Thoughts of it; and to do
her Justice, she put it off so cleverly, that I could not say she really
intended it, or whether she only mentioned the Practice as a horrible thing; for
she couch'd her Words so well, and took my Meaning so quickly, that she gave her
Negative before I could explain my self.
    To bring this part into as narrow a Compass as possible, I quited my Lodging
at St. Jones's, and went to my new Governess, for so they call'd her in the
House, and there I was indeed treated with so much Courtesy, so carefully look'd
to, and every thing so well, that I was surpris'd at it, and could not at first
see what Advantage my Governess made of it; but I found afterwards that she
profess'd to make no Profit of the Lodger's Dyet, nor indeed cou'd she get much
by it, but that her Profit lay in the other Articles of her Management, and she
made enough that way, I assure you; for 'tis scarce credible what Practice she
had, as well Abroad as at Home, and yet all upon the private Account, or in
plain English, the Whoring Account.
    While I was in her House, which was near four Months, she had no less than
twelve Ladies of Pleasure brought to Bed within Doors, and I think she had two
and thirty, or thereabouts under her Conduct without Doors, whereof one, as nice
as she was with me, was lodge'd with my old Landlady at St. Jones's.
    This was a strange Testimony of the growing Vice of the Age, and as bad as I
had been my self, it shock'd my very Senses, I began to nauceate the place I was
in, and above all, the Practice; and yet I must say that I never saw, or do I
believe there was to be seen the least indecency in the House the whole time I
was there.
    Not a Man was ever seen to come up Stairs, except to Visit the Lying-In
Ladies within their Month, nor then without the old Lady with them, who made it
a piece of the Honour of her Management that no Man should touch a Woman, No,
not his own Wife, within the Month; nor would she permit any Man to lye in the
House upon any pretence whatever, No, not tho' it was with his own Wife, and her
saying for it was, that she car'd not how many Children was born in her House,
but she would have none got there if she could help it.
    It might perhaps be carried farther than was needful, but it was an Error of
the Right Hand if it was an Error, for by this she kept up the Reputation, such
as it was, of her Business, and obtain'd this Character, that tho' she did take
Care of the Women when they were debauch'd, yet she was not Instrumental to
their being debauch'd at all, and yet it was a wicked Trade she drove too.
    While I was here, and before I was brought to Bed, I receive'd a Letter from
my Trustee at the Bank full of kind obliging things, and earnestly pressing me
to return to London: It was near a Fortnight old when it came to me, because it
had first been sent into Lancashire, and then return'd to me; he concludes with
telling me that he had obtain'd a Decree against his Wife, and that he would be
ready to make good his Engagement to me, if I would accept of him, adding a
great many Protestations of Kindness and Affection, such as he would have been
far from offering if he had known the Circumstances I had been in, and which as
it was I had been very far from deserving.
    I return'd an Answer to this Letter, and dated it at Liverpool, but sent it
by a Messenger, alleging, that it came in cover to a Friend in Town; I gave him
Joy of his Deliverance, but raise'd some Scruples at the Lawfulness of his
Marrying again, and told him, I suppose'd he would consider very seriously upon
that Point before he resolve'd on it, the Consequence being too great for a Man
of his judgement to venture rashly upon; so concluded wishing him very well in
whatever he resolve'd, without letting him into any thing of my own Mind, or
giving any Answer to his Proposal of my coming to London to him, but mention'd
at a distance my Intention to return the latter end of the Year, this being
dated in April.
    I was brought to Bed about the middle of May, and had another brave Boy, and
my self in as good Condition as usual on such Occasions: My Governess did her
part as a Midwife with the greatest Art and Dexterity imaginable, and far beyond
all that ever I had had any Experience of before.
    Her Care of me in my Travail, and after in my Lying-In, was such, that if
she had been my own Mother it could not have been better; let none be encouraged
in their loose Practices from this Dexterous Lady's Management, for she is gone
to her place, and I dare say has left nothing behind her that can or will come
up to it.
    I think I had been brought to Bed about twenty Days when I receive'd another
Letter from my Friend at the Bank, with the surprising News that he had obtain'd
a final Sentence of Divorce against his Wife, and had serve'd her with it on such
a Day, and that he had such an Answer to give to all my Scruples about his
Marrying again, as I could not expect, and as he had no Desire of; for that his
Wife, who had been under some Remorse before for her usage of him, as soon as
she heard that he had gain'd his Point, had very unhappily destroy'd herself
that same Evening.
    He express'd himself very handsomly as to his being concern'd at her
Disaster, but clear'd himself of having any hand in it, and that he had only
done himself Justice in a Case in which he was notoriously Injur'd and Abus'd:
However, he said that he was extremely afflicted at it, and had no view of any
Satisfaction left in this World, but only in the hope that I would come and
relieve him by my Company; and then he press'd me violently indeed to give him
some hopes, that I would at least come up to Town and let him see me, when he
would farther enter into Discourse about it.
    I was exceedingly Surprise'd at the News, and began now seriously to reflect
on my Circumstances, and the inexpressible Misfortune it was to have a Child
upon my Hands, and what to do in it I knew not; at last I open'd my Case at a
distance to my Governess, I appear'd melancholy for several Days, and she lay at
me continually to know what troubled me; I could not for my Life tell her that I
had an offer of Marriage, after I had so often told her that I had a Husband, so
that I really knew not what to say to her: I own'd I had something which very
much troubl'd me, but at the same time told her I cou'd not speak of it to any
one alive.
    She continued importuning me several Days, but it was impossible, I told her
, for me to commit the Secret to any Body: This, instead of being an Answer to
her, encreas'd her Importunities; she urg'd her having been trusted with the
greatest Secrets of this Nature, that it was her business to Conceal every
thing, and that to Discover things of that Nature would be her Ruin; she ask'd
me if ever I had found her Tatling of other People's Affairs, and how could I
suspect her? she told me, to unfold myself to her, was telling it to no Body;
that she was silent as Death, that it must be a very strange Case indeed, that
she could not help me out of; but to conceal it, was to deprive myself of all
possible Help, or means of Help, and to deprive her of the Opportunity of
Serving me. In short, she had such a bewitching Eloquence, and so great a power
of Perswasion, that there was no concealing any thing from her.
    So I resolve'd to unbosom myself to her, I told her the History of my
Lancashire Marriage, and how both of us had been Disappointed; how we came
together, and how we parted; How he Discharg'd me, as far as lay in him, and
gave me free Liberty to Marry again, protesting that if he knew it he would
never Claim me, or Disturb, or Expose me; that I thought I was free, but was
dreadfully afraid to venture, for fear of the Consequences that might follow in
case of a Discovery.
    Then I told her what a good Offer I had; show'd her my Friends Letters,
inviting me to London, and with what Affection they were written, but blotted
out the Name, and also the Story about the Disaster of his Wife, only that she
was dead.
    She fell a Laughing at my scruples about marrying, and told me the other was
no Marriage, but a Cheat on both Sides; and that as we were parted by mutual
Consent, the nature of the Contract was destroy'd, and the Obligation was
mutually discharg'd; She had Arguments for this at the tip of her Tongue; and in
short, reason'd me out of my Reason; not but that it was too by the help of my
own Inclination.
    But then came the great and main Difficulty, and that was the Child; this
she told me must be remove'd, and that so, as that it should never be possible
for any one to discover it: I knew there was no Marrying without concealing that
I had had a Child, for he would soon have discover'd by the Age of it, that it
was born, nay, and gotten too, since my Parly with him, and that would have
destroy'd all the Affair.
    But it touch'd my Heart so forcibly to think of Parting entirely with the
Child, and for ought I knew, of having it murder'd, or starve'd by Neglect and
Ill-usage, which was much the same, that I could not think of it, without
Horror: I wish all those Women who consent to the disposing their Children out
of the way, as it is call'd, for Decency sake, would consider that 'tis only a
contrive'd Method for Murther; that is to say, killing their Children with
safety.
    It is manifest to all that understand any thing of Children, that we are
born into the World helpless, and uncapable either to supply our own Wants, or
so much as make them known; and that without help, we must Perish; and this help
requires not only an assisting Hand, whether of the Mother, or some body else;
but there are two Things necessary in that assisting Hand, that is, Care and
Skill; without both which, half the Children that are born would die; nay, tho'
they were not to be deny'd Food; and one half more of those that remain'd would
be Cripples or Fools, loose their Limbs, and perhaps their Sense: I Question
not, but that these are partly the Reasons why Affection was plac'd by Nature in
the Hearts of Mothers to their Children; without which they would never be able
to give themselves up, as 'tis necessary they should, to the Care and waking
Pains needful to the Support of Children.
    Since this Care is needful to the Life of Children, to neglect them is to
Murther them; again, to give them up to be Manag'd by those People, who have
none of that needful Affection, plac'd by Nature in them, is to Neglect them in
the highest Degree; nay, in some it goes farther, and is in order to their being
Lost; so that 'tis an intentional Murther, whether the Child lives or dies.
    All those things represented themselves to my View, and that in the blackest
and most frightful Form; and as I was very free with my Governess, who I had now
learn'd to call Mother; I represented to her all the dark Thoughts which I had
about it, and told her what distress I was in: She seem'd graver by much at this
Part than at the other; but as she was harden'd in these things beyond all
possibility of being touch'd with the Religious part, and the Scruples about the
Murther; so she was equally impenetrable in that Part, which related to
Affection: She ask'd me if she had not been Careful and Tender of me in my
Lying-Inn, as if I had been her own Child? I told her I own'd she had. Well my
Dear, says she, and when you are gone, what are you to me? and what would it be
to me if you were to be Hang'd? Do you think there are not Women, who as it is
their Trade, and they get their Bread by it, value themselves upon their being
as careful of Children, as their own Mothers? Yes, yes, Child, says she, fear it
not, How were we Nurs'd ourselves? Are you sure, you was Nurs'd up by your own
Mother? and yet you look fat, and fair, Child, says the old Beldam, and with
that she stroak'd me over the face; never be concern'd, Child, says she, going
on in her drolling way: I have no Murtherers about me, I employ the best Nurses
that can be had; and have as few Children miscarry under their Hands, as there
would, if they were all Nurs'd by Mothers; we want neither Care nor Skill.
    She touch'd me to the Quick, when she ask'd if I was sure that I was nurs'd
by my own Mother; on the Contrary I was sure I was not; and I trembled and
look'd Pale at the very Expression; sure, said I, to my self, this Creature
cannot be a Witch, or have any Conversation with a Spirit that can inform her
what I was, before I was able to know it my self; and I look'd at her as if I
had been frighted; but reflecting that it could not be possible for her to know
any Thing about me, that went off, and I began to be easy, but it was not
presently.
    She perceive'd the Disorder I was in, but did not know the Meaning of it; so
she run on in her wild Talk upon the Weakness, of my supposing that Children
were murder'd because they were not all nurs'd by the Mother; and to perswade me
that the Children she disposed of, were as well used as if the Mothers had the
Nursing of them themselves.
    It may be true Mother, says I, for ought I know, but my Doubts are very
strongly grounded; come then, says she, lets hear some of them: Why first, says
I, you give a Piece of Money to these People to take the Child off the Parents
Hands, and to take Care of it as long as it lives; now we know Mother, said I,
that those are poor People, and their Gain consists in being quit of the Charge
as soon as they can; how can I doubt but that, as it is best for them to have
the Child die, they are not over Solicitous about its Life.
    This is all Vapours and Fancy, says she, I tell you their Credit depends
upon the Child's Life, and they are as careful as any Mother of you all.
    O Mother, says I, if I was but sure my little Baby would be carefully look'd
to, and have Justice done it, I should be happy; but it is impossible I can be
satisfy'd in that Point, unless I saw it, and to see it would be Ruin and
Destruction, as my Case now stands, so what to do I know not.
    A fine Story! says the Governess, you would see the Child, and you would not
see the Child; you would be conceal'd and discover'd both together; these are
things impossible, my Dear, and so you must e'en do as other conscientious
Mothers have done before you; and be contented with things as they must be, tho'
not as you wish them to be.
    I understood what she meant by conscientious Mothers, she would have said
conscientious Whores; but she was not willing to disoblige me, for really in
this Case I was not a Whore, because legally Marry'd, the Force of my former
Marriage excepted.
    However, let me be what I would, I was not come up to that pitch of
Hardness, common to the Profession; I mean to be unnatural, and regardless of
the Safety of my Child, and I preserve'd this honest Affection so long, that I
was upon the Point of giving up my Friend at the Bank, who lay so hard at me to
come to him, and Marry him, that there was hardly any Room to deny him.
    At last my old Governess came to me, with her usual Assurance. Come my Dear,
says she, I have found out a way, how you shall be at a Certainty, that your
Child shall be used well, and yet the People that take Care of it, shall never
know you.
    O Mother, say I, If you can do so, you will engage me to you for ever: Well,
says she, are you willing to be at some small Annual Expense, more than what we
usually give to the People we contract with? Ay, says I, with all my Heart,
provided I may be concealed; as to that, says she, you shall be secure, For the
Nurse shall never dare to Enquire about you, and you shall once or twice a Year
go with me and see your Child, and see how 'tis used, and be satisfy'd that it
is in good Hands, no Body knowing who you are.
    Why, said I, do you think that when I come to see my Child, I shall be able
to conceal my being the Mother of it, do you think that possible?
    Well, says she, if you discover it, the Nurse shall be never the Wiser: She
shall be forbid to take any Notice; if she offers it, she shall lose the Money,
which you are to be suppose'd to give her, and the Child be taken from her too.
    I was very well pleas'd with this; so the next Week a Country Woman was
brought from Hertford, or thereabouts, who was to take the Child off our Hands
entirely, for 10l. in Money; but if I would allow 5l. a Year more to her, she
would be oblige'd to bring the Child to my Governesses House as often as we
desire'd, or we should come down and look at it, and see how well she used it.
    The Woman was a very wholesome-look'd likely Woman, a Cottager's Wife, but
she had very good clothes and Linnen, and every thing well about her, and with a
heavy Heart and many a Tear, I let her have my Child: I had been down at
Hertford and look'd at her, and at her Dwelling, which I lik'd well enough; and
I promised her great Things if she would be kind to the Child, so she knew at
first Word that I was the Child's Mother; but she seem'd to be so much out of
the Way; and to have no Room to enquire after me, that I thought I was safe
enough, so in short, I consented to let her have the Child, and I gave her 10l.,
that is to say I gave it to my Governess, who gave it the poor Woman before my
Face, she agreeing never to return the Child back to me, or to clame any Thing
more for its Keeping, or Bringing up; only that I promised, if she took a great
deal of Care of it, I would give her some thing more as often as I came to see
it; so that I was not bound to pay the 5l. only that I promise'd my Governess I
would do it: And thus my great Care was over, after a manner, which tho' it did
not at all satisfy my Mind, yet was the most convenient for me, as my Affairs
then stood, of any that could be thought of at that Time.
    I then began to write to my Friend at the Bank, in a more kindly Style, and
particularly about the Beginning of July I sent him a Letter, that I purpos'd to
be in Town sometime in August; he return'd me an Answer in the most passionate
Terms imaginable, and desire'd me to let him have timely Notice, and he would
come and meet me two Days Journey: This puzzl'd me scurvily, and I did not know
what Answer to make to it; once I was resolve'd to take the Stage Coach to West
Chester, on Purpose only, to have the Satisfaction of coming back, that he might
see me really come in the same Coach; for I had a jealous Thought, tho I had no
Ground for it at all, least he should think I was not really in the Country.
    I endeavour'd to Reason my self out of it, but it was in vain, the
Impression lay so strong on my Mind, that it was not to be resisted; at last it
came as an Addition to my new Design of going into the Country, that it would be
an excellent Blind to my old Governess, and would cover entirely all my other
Affairs, for she did not know in the least, whether my new Lover liv'd in London
, or, in Lancashire, and when I told her my Resolution, she was fully persuaded
it was in Lancashire.
    Having taken my Measures for this Journey, I let her know it, and sent the
Maid that tended me from the Beginning, to take a Place for me in the Coach; she
would have had me let the Maid have waited on me down to the last Stage, and
come up again in the Waggon, but I convince'd her it would not be convenient;
when I went away, she told me, she would enter into no Measures for
Correspondence, for she saw evidently that my affection to my Child would cause
me to write to her, and to Visit her too, when I came to Town again; I assure'd
her it would, and so took my Leave, well satisfy'd, to have been freed from such
a House, however good my Accommodations there had been.
    I took the Place in the Coach not to its full Extent, but to a place called
Stone, in Cheshire, where I not only had no manner of Business, but not the
least Acquaintance with any Person in the Town: But I knew that with Money in
the Pocket one is at Home any where; so I lodge'd there two or three Days, 'till
watching my Opportunity, I found Room in another Stage Coach, and took Passage
back again for London, sending a Letter to my Gentleman, that I should be such a
certain Day at Stony-Stratford, where the Coachman told me he was to Lodge.
    It happen'd to be a Chance Coach that I had taken up, which having been
hired on Purpose to carry some Gentlemen to West-Chester, who were going for
Ireland, was now returning, and did not tye it self up to exact Times or Places,
as the Stages did, so that having been oblige'd to lye still on Sunday, he had
Time to get himself ready to come out, which otherwise he could not have done.
    His Warning was so short, that he could not reach Stony-Stratford time
enough to be with me at Night, but he met me at a Place called Brickill the next
Morning, just as we were coming into the Town.
    I confess I was very glad to see him, for I thought my self a little
disappointed over Night: He pleas'd me doubly too by the Figure he came in, for
he brought a very handsome (Gentleman's) Coach, and four Horses, with a Servant
to attend him.
    He took me out of the Stage Coach immediately, which stop'd at an Inn in
Brickill, and putting into the same Inn, he set up his own Coach, and bespoke
his Dinner; I ask'd him what he meant by that, for I was for going forward with
the Journey; he said, no, I had need of a little Rest upon the Road, and that
was a very good sort of a House, tho' it was but a little Town; so we would go
no farther that Night, what ever came of it.
    I did not press him much, for since he had come so far to meet me, and put
himself to so much Expense, it was but reasonable I should oblige him a little
too, so I was easy as to that Point.
    After Dinner we walk'd to see the Town, to see the Church, and to view the
Fields, and the Country as is usual for Strangers to do, and our Landlord was
our Guide in going to see the Church. I observe'd my Gentleman enquire'd pretty
much about the Parson, and I took the hint immediately, that he certainly would
propose to be married; and it follow'd presently, that in short, I would not
refuse him; for to be plain with my Circumstances, I was in no condition now to
say NO, I had no reason now to run any more such hazards.
    But while these Thoughts run round in my Head, which was the work but of a
few Moments, I observe'd my Landlord took him aside and whisper'd to him, tho'
not very softly neither, for so much I over-heard, Sir, if you shall have
occasion ----- the rest I could not hear, but it seems it was to this purpose,
Sir, if you shall have occasion for a Minister, I have a Friend a little way off
that will serve you, and be as private as you please; my Gentleman answer'd loud
enough for me to hear, very well, I believe I shall.
    I was no sooner come back to the Inn, but he fell upon me with irresistible
Words, that since he had had the good Fortune to meet me, and everything
concurr'd, it would be hastening his Felicity if I would put an end to the
matter just there; what do you mean says I, colouring a little, what, in an Inn,
and on the Road! Bless us all, said I, how can you talk so! O I can talk so very
well, says he, I came on purpose to talk so, and I'll show you that I did, and
with that he pulls out a great Bundle of Papers; you fright me, said I, what are
all these? don't be frighted, my Dear, said he, and kiss'd me, this was the
first time that he had been so free to call me my Dear; then he repeated it,
don't be frighted, you shall see what it is all, then he laid them all abroad;
there was first the Deed or Sentence of Divorce from his Wife, and the full
Evidence of her playing the Whore; then there was the Certificates of the
Minister and Church-wardens of the Parish where she liv'd, proving that she was
buried, and intimating the manner of her Death; the Copy of the Coroner's
Warrant for a Jury to sit upon her, and the verdict of the Jury, who brought it
in Non Compos Mentis; all this was to give me Satisfaction, tho' by the way, I
was not so scrupulous, had he known all, but that I might have taken him without
it: However, I look'd them all over as well as I cou'd, and told him, that this
was all very clear indeed, but that he need not have brought them out with him,
for it was time enough: Well, he said, it might be time enough for me, but no
time but the present time was time enough for him.
    There were other Papers roll'd up, and I ask'd him what they were? Why, Ay,
says he, that's the Question I wanted to have you ask me; so he takes out a
little Chagreen Case, and gives me out of it a very fine Diamond Ring; I could
not refuse it, if I had a mind to do so, for he put it upon my Finger; so I only
made him a Curtsy, then he takes out another Ring, and this, says he, is for
another Occasion, and puts that into his Pocket: Well, but let me see it tho',
says I, and smile'd, I guess what it is, I think you are Mad: I should have been
Mad if I had done less, says he, and still he did not show it me, and I had a
great mind to see it; so I says, well, but let me see it; hold, says he, first
look here, then he took up the Roll again, and read it, and behold! it was a
License for us to be married: Why, says I, are you Distracted? you were fully
satisfy'd sure that I would yield at first Word, or resolve'd to take no denial;
the last is certainly the Case, said he; but you may be mistaken, said I; no,
no, says he, I must not be denied, I can't be denied, and with that he fell to
kissing me so violently, I could not get rid of him.
    There was a Bed in the Room, and we were walking to and again, eager in the
Discourse, at last, he takes me by surprise in his Arms, and threw me on the Bed
and himself with me, and holding me still fast in his Arms, but without the
least offer of any Undecency, Courted me to Consent with such repeated
Entreaties and Arguments; protesting his Affection, and vowing he would not let
me go, till I had promised him, that at last I said, why you resolve not to be
deny'd indeed, I think: No, no, says he, I must not be deny'd, I won't be
deny'd, I can't be deny'd: Well, well, said I, and giving him a slight Kiss,
then you shan't be deny'd, let me get up.
    He was so Transported with my Consent, and the kind manner of it, that I
began to think Once, he took it for a Marriage, and would not stay for the Form;
but I wrong'd him, for he took me by the Hand, pull'd me up again, and then
giving me two or three Kisses, thank'd me for my kind yielding to him; and was
so overcome with the Satisfaction of it, that I saw Tears stand in his Eyes.
    I turned from him, for it fill'd my Eyes with Tears too; and ask'd him leave
to retire a little to my Chamber: If I had a Grain of true Repentance for an
abominable Life of 24 Years past, it was then. Oh! what a felicity is it to
Mankind, said I, to myself, that they cannot see into the Hearts of one another!
How happy had it been, if I had been Wife to a Man of so much Honesty, and so
much Affection from the Beginning?
    Then it occur'd to me what an abominable Creature am I! and how is this
innocent Gentleman going to be abus'd by me! How little does he think, that
having Divorc'd a Whore, he is throwing himself into the Arms of another! that
he is going to Marry one that has lain with two Brothers, and has had three
Children by her own Brother! one that was born in Newgate, whose Mother was a
Whore, and is now a transported Thief; one that has lain with thirteen Men, and
has had a Child since he saw me! poor Gentleman! said I, What he is going to do!
After this reproaching myself was over, it followed thus: Well, if I must be his
Wife, if it please God to give me Grace, I'll be a true Wife to him, and love
him suitably to the strange Excess of his Passion for me; I will make him
amends, by what he shall see, for the Abuses I put upon him, which he does not
see.
    He was impatient for my coming out of my Chamber, but finding me long, he
went down Stairs, and talk'd with my Landlord about the Parson.
    My Landlord, an Officious, tho' well-meaning Fellow, had sent away for the
Clergy Man; and when my Gentleman began to speak to him, of sending for him,
Sir, says he to him, my Friend is in the House; so without any more words he
brought them together: When he came to the Minister, he ask'd him if he would
venture to marry a couple of Strangers that were both willing? The Parson said
that Mr. --- had said something to him of it; that he hop'd it was no
Clandestine Business; that he seem'd to be a grave Gentleman, and he suppose'd
Madam was not a Girl, so that the consent of Friends should be wanted; to put
you out of doubt of that, says my Gentleman, read this Paper, and out he pulls
the License; I am satisfy'd, says the Minister, where is the Lady? you shall see
her presently, says my Gentleman.
    When he had said thus, he comes up stairs, and I was by that time come out
of my Room, so he tells me the Minister was below, and that upon showing him the
License, he was free to marry us with all his Heart, but he asks to see you, so
he ask'd if I would let him come up.
    'Tis time enough, said I, in the Morning, is it not? Why, said he, my Dear,
he seem'd to scruple whether it was not some young Girl stolen from her Parents,
and I assure'd him we were both of Age to command our own Consent; and that made
him ask to see you; well, said I, do as you please; so up they brings the
Parson, and a merry good sort of Gentleman he was: he had been told, it seems,
that we had met there by accident, that I came in a Chester Coach, and my
Gentleman in his own Coach to meet me: that we were to have met last Night at
Stony-Stratford, but that he could not reach so far: Well, Sir, says the Parson,
every ill turn has some good in it; the Disappointment, Sir, says he to my
Gentleman, was yours, and the good Turn is mine, for if you had met at
Stony-Stratford I had not had the Honour to Marry you: LANDLORD, have you a
Common Prayer Book?
    I started as if I had been frighted, Sir, says I, what do you mean, what to
marry in an Inn, and at Night too! Madam, says the Minister, if you will have it
be in the Church you shall; but I assure you your Marriage will be as firm here
as in the Church; we are not tyed by the Canons to Marry no where but in the
Church; and as for the time of Day, it does not at all weigh in this Case, our
Princes are married in their Chambers, and at Eight or Ten a Clock at Night.
    I was a great while before I could be persuaded, and pretended not to be
willing at all to be married but in the Church; but it was all Grimace; so I
seem'd at last to be prevail'd on, and my Landlord, and his Wife and Daughter,
were call'd up: My Landlord was Father and Clark and all together, and we were
married, and very Merry we were; tho' I confess the self-reproaches which I had
upon me before, lay close to me, and extorted every now and then a deep sigh
from me, which my Bridegroom took notice of, and endeavour'd to encourage me,
thinking, poor Man, that I had some little hesitations at the Step I had taken
so hastily.
    We enjoy'd our selves that Evening completely, and yet all was kept so
private in the Inn, that not a Servant in the House knew of it, for my Landlady
and her Daughter waited on me, and would not let any of the Maids come up
stairs. My Landlady's Daughter I call'd my Bride Maid; and sending for a
Shopkeeper the next Morning, I gave the young Woman a good Suit of Knots, as
good as the Town would afford, and finding it was a Lacemaking Town, I gave her
Mother a Piece of Bone-lace for a Head.
    One Reason that my Landlord was so close was, that he was unwilling the
Minister of the Parish should hear of it; but for all that somebody heard of it,
so as that we had the Bells set a Ringing the next Morning early, and the
Musick, such as the Town would afford, under our Window; but my Landlord
brazen'd it out, that we were marry'd before we came thither, only that being
his former Guests, we would have our Wedding-Supper at his House.
    We could not find in our Hearts to stir the next day; for, in short, having
been disturb'd by the Bells in the Morning, and having perhaps not slept over
much before, we were so sleepy afterwards that we lay in Bed till almost Twelve
a Clock.
    I beg'd my Landlady, that we might have no more Musick in the Town, nor
ringing of Bells, and she manage'd it so well that we were very quiet: But an odd
Passage interrupted all my Mirth for a good while; the great Room of the House
look'd into the Street, and I had walk'd to the End of the Room, and it being a
pleasant warm Day, I had open'd the Window, and was standing at it for some Air,
when I saw three Gentlemen ride by, and go into an Inn just against us.
    It was not to be conceal'd, nor did it leave me any Room to question it, but
the second of the three, was my Lancashire Husband: I was frighted to Death, I
never was in such a Consternation in my Life, I thought I should have sunk into
the Ground, my Blood run chill in my Veins, and I trembl'd as if I had been in a
cold fit of an Ague: I say, there was no room to question the Truth of it, I
knew his clothes, I knew his Horse, and I knew his Face.
    The first Reflection I made was, that my Husband was not by to see my
Disorder, and that I was very glad of: The Gentlemen had not been long in the
House but they came to the Window of their Room, as is usual; but my Window was
shut you may be sure: However, I could not keep from peeping at them, and there
I saw him again, heard him call to one of the Servants for something he wanted,
and receive'd all the terrifying Confirmations of its being the same Person, that
were possible to be had.
    My next concern was to know, what was his Business there; but that was
impossible; sometimes my Imagination form'd an Idea of one frightful thing,
sometimes of another; sometimes I thought he had discover'd me, and was come to
upbraid me with Ingratitude and Breach of Honour; then I fancied he was coming
up Stairs to insult me; and innumerable Thoughts came into my Head, of what was
never in his Head, nor ever could be, unless the Devil had reveal'd it to him.
    I remain'd in the Fright near two Hours, and scarce ever kept my Eye from
the Window or Door of the Inn, where they were: At last hearing a great clutter
in the Passage of their Inn, I run to the Window, and, to my great Satisfaction,
I saw them all three go out again and travel on Westward; had they gone towards
London, I should have been still in a Fright, least I should meet him again, and
that he should know me; but he went the contrary way, and so I was eas'd of that
Disorder.
    We resolve'd to be going the next Day, but about six a Clock at Night we were
alarm'd with a great Uproar in the Street, and People riding as if they had been
out of their Wits, and what was it but a Hue and Cry after three Highway Men,
that had rob'd two Coaches, and some Travellers near Dunstable Hill, and notice
had, it seems, been given, that they had been seen at Brickill at such a House,
meaning the House where those Gentlemen had been.
    The House was immediately beset and search'd, but there were witnesses
enough that the Gentlemen had been gone above three Hours; the Crowd having
gathered about, we had the News presently; and I was heartily concern'd now
another way: I presently told the People of the House, that I durst say those
were honest Persons, for that I knew one of the Gentlemen to be a very honest
Person, and of a good Estate in Lancashire.
    The Constable, who came with the Hue and Cry, was immediately inform'd of
this, and came over to me to be satisfy'd from my own Mouth, and I assure'd him
that I saw the three Gentlemen as I was at the Window, that I saw them
afterwards at the Windows of the Room they din'd in; that I saw them take Horse,
and I would assure him I knew one of them to be such a Man, that he was a
Gentleman of a very good Estate, and an undoubted Character in Lancashire, from
whence I was just now upon my Journey.
    The assurance with which I deliver'd this, gave the Mob Gentry a Check, and
gave the Constable such Satisfaction, that he immediately sounded a Retreat,
told his People these were not the Men, but that he had an account they were
very honest Gentlemen, and so they went all back again; what the Truth of the
matter was I knew not, but certain it was that the Coaches were rob'd at
Dunstable Hill, and 560l. in Money taken, besides some of the Lace Merchants
that always Travel that way had been visited too; as to the three Gentlemen,
that remains to be explain'd hereafter.
    Well, this Allarm stop'd us another Day, tho' my Spouse told me it was
always safest Travelling after a Robbery, for that the Thieves were sure to be
gone far enough off when they had allarm'd the Country; but I was uneasy, and
indeed principally least my old Acquaintance should be upon the Road still, and
should chance to see me.
    I never liv'd four pleasanter Days together in my life, I was a meer Bride
all this while, and my new Spouse strove to make me easy in every thing: O
could this State of Life have continue'd! how had all my past Troubles been
forgot, and my future Sorrows been avoided! but I had a past life of a most
wretched kind to account for, some of it in this World as well as in another.
    We came away the fifth Day; and my Landlord, because he saw me uneasy,
mounted himself, his Son, and three honest Country Fellows, with good Fire-Arms,
and, without telling us of it, follow'd the Coach, and would see us safe into
Dunstable; we could do no less than treat them very handsomely at Dunstable,
which Cost my Spouse about Ten or Twelve Shillings, and something he gave the
Men for their Time too, but my Landlord would take nothing for himself.
    This was the most happy Contrivance for me that could have fallen out, for
had I come to London unmarried, I must either have come to him for the first
Night's Entertainment, or have discovered to him that I had not one Acquaintance
in the whole City of London, that could receive a poor Bride for the first
Night's Lodging with her Spouse: But now I made no scruple of going directly
home with him, and there I took Possession at once of a House well Furnished,
and a Husband in very good Circumstances, so that I had a prospect of a very
happy Life, if I knew how to manage it; and I had leisure to consider of the
real Value of the Life I was likely to live; how different it was to be from the
loose part I had acted before, and how much happier a Life of Virtue and
Sobriety is, than that which we call a Life of Pleasure.
    O had this particular Scene of Life lasted, or had I learnt from that time I
enjoy'd it, to have tasted the true sweetness of it, and had I not fallen into
that Poverty which is the sure Bane of Virtue, how happy had I been, not only
here, but perhaps for ever? for while I liv'd thus, I was really a Penitent for
all my Life pass'd, I look'd back on it with Abhorrence, and might truly be said
to hate my self for it: I often reflected how my Lover at Bath, strook by the
Hand of God, repented and abandon'd me, and refuse'd to see me any more, tho' he
love'd me to an extreme; but I, prompted by that worst of Devils, Poverty,
return'd to the vile Practice, and made the Advantage of what they call a
handsome Face, be the Relief to my Necessities, and Beauty be a Pimp to Vice.
    Now I seem'd landed in a safe Harbour, after the Stormy Voyage of Life past
was at an end; and I began to be thankful for my Deliverance: I sat many an Hour
by my self, and wept over the Remembrance of past Follies, and the dreadful
Extravagances of a wicked Life, and sometimes I flatter'd my self that I had
sincerely repented.
    But there are Temptations which it is not in the Power of Human Nature to
resist, and few know what would be their Case, if driven to the same Exigences:
As Covetousness is the Root of all Evil, so Poverty is the worst of all Snares:
But I wave that Discourse till I come to the Experiment.
    I liv'd with this Husband in the utmost Tranquility; hewasa Quiet, Sensible,
Soberman, Virtuous, Modest, Sincere, and in his Business Diligent and Just: His
Business was in a narrow Compass, and his Income sufficient to a plentiful way
of Living in the ordinary way; I do not say to keep an Equipage, and make a
Figure as the World calls it, nor did I expect it, or desire it; for as I
abhorred the Levity and Extravagance of my former Life, so I chose now to live
retire'd, frugal, and within ourselves; I kept no Company, made no Visits; minded
my Family, and obliged my Husband; and this kind of Life became a Pleasure to
me.
    We liv'd in an uninterrupted course of Ease and Content for five Years, when
a sudden Blow from an almost invisible Hand, blasted all my happiness, and
turn'd me out into the World in a Condition the reverse of all that had been
before it.
    My Husband having trusted one of his Fellow Clarks with a Sum of Money, too
much for our Fortunes to bear the Loss of, the Clark fail'd, and the Loss fell
very heavy on my Husband, yet it was not so great, but that if he had had
Courage to have look'd his Misfortunes in the Face, his Credit was so good, that
as I told him, he would easily recover it; for to sink under Trouble is to
double the Weight, and he that will Die in it, shall Die in it.
    It was in vain to speak comfortably to him, the Wound had sunk too deep, it
was a Stab that touch'd the Vitals, he grew Melancholy and Disconsolate, and
from thence Lethargick, and died; I foresaw the Blow, and was extremely
oppress'd in my Mind, for I saw evidently that if he died I was undone.
    I had had two Children by him and no more, for it began to be time for me to
leave bearing Children, for I was now Eight and Forty, and I suppose if he had
liv'd I should have had no more.
    I was now left in a dismal and disconsolate Case indeed, and in several
things worse than ever: First it was past the flourishing time with me when I
might expect to be courted for a Mistress; that agreeable part had decline'd some
time, and the Ruins only appear'd of what had been; and that which was worse
than all was this, that I was the most dejected, disconsolate Creature alive; I
that had encourage'd my Husband, and endeavour'd to support his Spirits under his
Trouble could not support my own; I wanted that Spirit in trouble which I told
him was so necessary for bearing the burden.
    But my Case was indeed Deplorable, for I was left perfectly Friendless and
Helpless, and the Loss my Husband had sustain'd had reduce'd his Circumstances so
low, that tho' indeed I was not in Debt, yet I could easily foresee that what
was left would not support me long; that it wasted daily for Subsistence, so
that it would be soon all spent, and then I saw nothing before me but the utmost
Distress, and this represented it self so lively to my Thoughts, that it seem'd
as if it was come, before it was really very near; also my very Apprehensions
doubl'd the Misery, for I fancied every Sixpence that I paid for a Loaf of
Bread, was the last I had in the World, and that To-morrow I was to fast, and be
starve'd to Death.
    In this Distress I had no Assistant, no Friend to comfort or advise me, I
sat and cried and tormented myself Night and Day; wringing my Hands, and
sometimes raving like a distracted Woman; and indeed I have often wonder'd it
had not affected my Reason, for I had the Vapours to such a degree, that my
Understanding was sometimes quite lost in Fancies and Imaginations.
    I liv'd two Years in this dismal Condition, wasting that little I had,
weeping continually over my dismal Circumstances, and as it were only bleeding
to Death, without the least hope or prospect of help; and now I had cried so
long, and so often, that Tears were exhausted, and I began to be Desperate, for
I grew poor apace.
    For a little Relief, I had put off my House and took Lodgings; and as I was
reducing my Living, so I sold off most of my Goods, which put a little Money in
my Pocket, and I liv'd near a Year upon that, spending very sparingly, and
eeking things out to the utmost; but still when I look'd before me, my Heart
would sink within me at the inevitable approach of Misery and Want: O let none
read this part without seriously reflecting on the Circumstances of a desolate
State, and how they would grapple with want of Friends and want of Bread; it
will certainly make them think not of sparing what they have only, but of
looking up to Heaven for support, and of the wise Man's Prayer, Give me not
Poverty least I steal.
    Let 'em remember that a time of Distress, is a time of dreadful Temptation,
and all the Strength to resist is taken away; Poverty presses, the Soul is made
Desperate by Distress, and what can be done? It was one Evening, when being
brought, as I may say, to the last Gasp, I think I may truly say I was
Distracted and Raving, when prompted by I know not what Spirit, and as it were,
doing I did not know what, or why; I dress'd me, for I had still pretty good
clothes, and went out: I am very sure I had no manner of Design in my Head, when
I went out, I neither knew or consider'd where to go, or on what Business; but
as the Devil carried me out, and laid his Bait for me, so he brought me to be
sure to the place, for I knew not whether I was going or what I did.
    Wandring thus about I knew not whether, I pass'd by an Apothecary's Shop in
Leadenhall-street, where I saw lye on a Stool just before the Compter a little
Bundle wrapt in a white Cloth, beyond it stood a Maid Servant with her Back to
it, looking up towards the top of the Shop, where the Apothecary's Apprentice,
as I suppose, was standing up on the Compter, with his back also to the Door,
and a Candle in his Hand, looking and reaching up to the upper Shelf, for
something he wanted, so that both were engage'd, and no Body else in the Shop.
    This was the Bait; and the Devil who laid the Snare, prompted me, as if he
had spoke, for I remember, and shall never forget it, 'twas like a voice Spoken
over my Shoulder, take the Bundle; be quick; do it this Moment; it was no sooner
said but I step'd into the Shop, and with my Back to the Wench, as if I had
stood up for a Cart that was going by, I put my Hand behind me and took the
Bundle, and went off with it, the Maid or Fellow not perceiving me, or any one
else.
    It is impossible to express the Horror of my Soul all the while I did it.
When I went away I had no Heart to run, or scarce to mend my pace; I cross'd the
Street indeed, and went down the first turning I came to, and I think it was a
Street that went thro' into Fenchurch-street, from thence I crossed and turn'd
thro' so many ways and turnings, that I could never tell which way it was, nor
where I went, I felt not the Ground I stepped on, and the farther I was out of
Danger, the faster I went, till tyr'd and out of Breath, I was force'd to sit
down on a little Bench at a Door, and then found I was got into Thames-street,
near Billingsgate: I rested me a little and went on, my Blood was all in a Fire,
my Heart beat as if I was in a sudden Fright: In short, I was under such a
Surprise that I knew not whether I was a going, or what to do.
    After I had tyr'd my self thus with walking a long way about, and so
eagerly, I began to consider and make home to my Lodging, where I came about
Nine a Clock at Night.
    What the Bundle was made up for, or on what Occasion laid where I found it,
I knew not, but when I came to open it, I found there was a Suit of Child-bed
Linnen in it, very good and almost new, the Lace very fine; there was a Silver
Porringer of a Pint, a small Silver Mug and Six Spoons, with some other Linnen,
a good Smock, and Three Silk Handkerchiefs, and in the Mug in a Paper, Eighteen
Shillings and Six-pence in Money.
    All the while I was opening these things I was under such dreadful
Impressions of Fear, and in such Terror of Mind, tho' I was perfectly safe, that
I cannot express the manner of it; I sat me down and cried most vehemently:
Lord, said I, what am I now? a Thief! why I shall be taken next time and be
carried to Newgate and be Try'd for my Life! and with that I cry'd again a long
time, and I am sure, as poor as I was, if I had durst for fear, I would
certainly have carried the Things back again; but that went off after a while:
Well, I went to Bed for that Night, but slept little, the Horror of the Fact was
upon my Mind, and I knew not what I said or did all Night, and all the next Day:
Then I was impatient to hear some News of the Loss; and would fain know how it
was, whether they were a Poor Bodies Goods, or a Rich; perhaps, said I, it may
be some poor Widow like me, that had pack'd up these Goods to go and sell them
for a little Bread for herself and a poor Child, and are now starving and
breaking their Hearts, for want of that little they would have fetch'd, and this
Thought tormented me worse than all the rest, for three or four Days.
    But my own Distresses silenc'd all these Reflections, and the prospect of my
own Starving, which grew every Day more frightful to me, harden'd my Heart by
degrees; it was then particularly heavy upon my Mind, that I had been reform'd
and had, as I hop'd, repented of all my pass'd wickednesses; that I had liv'd a
sober, grave, retire'd Life for several Years, but now I should be driven by the
dreadful Necessity of my Circumstances to the Gates of Destruction, Soul and
Body; and two or three times I fell upon my Knees, praying to God, as well as I
could, for Deliverance; but I cannot but say, my Prayers had no hope in them; I
knew not what to do, it was all Fear without, and Dark within; and I reflected
on my pass'd Life as not repented of, that Heaven was now beginning to punish
me, and would make me as miserable as I had been wicked.
    Had I gone on here I had perhaps been a true Penitent; but I had an evil
Counsellor within, and he was continually prompting me to relieve my self by the
worst means; so one Evening he tempted me again by the same wicked Impulse that
had said, take that Bundle, to go out again and seek for what might happen.
    I went out now by Day-light, and wandred about I knew not whether, and in
search of I knew not what, when the Devil put a Snare in my way of a dreadful
Nature indeed, and such a one as I have never had before or since; going thro'
Aldersgate-street, there was a pretty little Child had been at a Dancing-School,
and was a going home all alone, and my Prompter, like a true Devil, set me upon
this innocent Creature; I talk'd to it, and it prattl'd to me again, and I took
it by the Hand and led it a long till I came to a pav'd Alley that goes into
Bartholomew-Close, and I led it in there; the Child said that was not its way
home; I said, yes, my Dear, it is, I'll show you the way home; the Child had a
little Necklace on of Gold Beads, and I had my Eye upon that, and in the dark of
the Alley I stoop'd, pretending to mend the Child's Clog that was loose, and
took off her Necklace, and the Child never felt it, and so led the Child on
again: Here, I say, the Devil put me upon killing the Child in the dark Alley,
that it might not Cry, but the very thought frighted me so that I was ready to
drop down, but I turn'd the Child about and bad it go back again, for that was
not its way home; the Child said so she would, and I went thro' into
Bartholomew-Close, and then turn'd round to another Passage that goes into
Long-lane, so away into Charterhouse-Yard, and out into St. John's-street; then
crossing into Smithfield, went down Chick-lane, and into Field-lane, to
Holbourn-bridge, when mixing with the Crowd of People usually passing there, it
was not possible to have been found out; and thus I made my second Sally into
the World.
    The thoughts of this Booty put out all the thoughts of the first, and the
Reflections I had made wore quickly off; Poverty harden'd my Heart, and my own
Necessities made me regardless of anything: The last Affair left no great
Concern upon me, for as I did the poor Child no harm, I only thought, I had
given the Parents a just Reproof for their Negligence, in leaving the poor Lamb
to come home by it self, and it would teach them to take more Care another time.
    This String of Beads was worth about Twelve or Fourteen Pounds, I suppose it
might have been formerly the Mother's, for it was too big for the Child's wear,
but that, perhaps, the Vanity of the Mother to have her Child look Fine at the
Dancing School, had made her let the Child wear it, and no doubt the Child had a
Maid sent to take care of it, but she, like a careless Jade, was taken up
perhaps with some Fellow that had met her, and so the poor Baby wandred till it
fell into my Hands.
    However, I did the Child no harm, I did not so much as fright it, for I had
a great many tender Thoughts about me yet, and did nothing but what, as I may
say, meer Necessity drove me to.
    I had a great many Adventures after this, but I was young in the Business,
and did not know how to manage, otherwise than as the Devil put things into my
Head; and indeed he was seldom backward to me: One Adventure I had which was
very lucky to me; I was going thro' Lombard street in the dusk of the Evening,
just by the end of Three King Court, when on a sudden comes a Fellow running by
me as swift as Lightning, and throws a Bundle that was in his Hand just behind
me, as I stood up against the corner of the House at the turning into the Alley;
just as he threw it in, he said, God bless you Mistress let it lie there a
little, and away he runs: After him comes two more, and immediately a young
Fellow without his Hat, crying stop Thief, they persued the two last Fellows so
close, that they were force'd to drop what they had got, and one of them was
taken into the bargain, the other got off free.
    I stood stock still all this while till they came back, dragging the poor
Fellow they had taken, and lugging the Things they had found, extremely well
satisfied that they had recovered the Booty, and taken the Thief; and thus they
pass'd by me, for I look'd only like one who stood up while the Crowd was gone.
    Once or twice I ask'd what was the matter, but the People neglected
answering me, and I was not very importunate; but after the Crowd was wholly
pass'd, I took my opportunity to turn about and take up what was behind me and
walk away: This indeed I did with less Disturbance than I had done formerly, for
these things I did not steal, but they were stolen to my Hand: I got safe to my
Lodgings with this Cargo, which was a Peice of fine black Lustring Silk, and a
peice of Velvet; the latter was but part of a Peice of about 11 Yards; the
former was a whole Peice of near 50 Yards; it seems it was a Mercer's Shop that
they had rifl'd; I say, rifled, because the Goods were so considerable that they
had Lost; for the Goods that they Recover'd were pretty many, and I believe came
to about six or seven several Peices of Silk: How they came to get so many I
could not tell; but as I had only robb'd the Thief, I made no scruple at taking
these Goods, and being very glad of them too.
    I had pretty good Luck thus far, and I made several Adventures more, tho'
with but small Purchase, yet with good Success, but I went in daily dread that
some mischief would befal me, and that I should certainly come to be hang'd at
last: The impression this made on me was too strong to be slighted, and it kept
me from making attempts, that for ought I knew might have been very safely
perform'd; but one thing I cannot omit, which was a Bait to me many a Day. I
walked frequently out into the Villages round the Town to see if nothing would
fall in my Way there; and going by a House near Stepney, I saw on the
Window-board two Rings, one a small Diamond Ring, and the other a plain Gold
Ring, to be sure laid there by some thoughtless Lady, that had more Money than
Forecast, perhaps only till she wash'd her Hands.
    I walk'd several times by the Window to observe if I could see whether there
was any Body in the Room or no, and I could see no Body, but still I was not
sure; it came presently into my Thoughts to rap at the Glass, as if I wanted to
speak with some Body, and if any Body was there they would be sure to come to
the Window, and then I would tell them to remove those Rings, for that I had
seen two suspicious Fellows take notice of them: This was a ready Thought, I
rapt once or twice and no Body came, when I thrust hard against the Square of
Glass, and broke it with little Noise, and took out the two Rings, and walk'd
away, the Diamond Ring was worth about 3l., and the other about 9s.
    I was now at a loss for a Market for my Goods, and especially for my two
Peices of Silk, I was very loth to dispose of them for a Trifle; as the poor
unhappy Thieves in general do, who after they have venture'd their Lives for
perhaps a thing of Value, are force'd to sell it for a Song when they have done;
but I was resolve'd I would not do thus, whatever Shift I made; however, I did
not well know what Course to take: At last I resolve'd to go to my old Governess,
and acquaint my self with her again; I had punctually supply'd the 5l. a Year to
her for my little Boy as long as I was able; but at last was oblige'd to put a
stop to it: However, I had written a Letter to her, wherein I had told her that
my Circumstances were reduce'd; that I had lost my Husband, and that I was not
able to do it any longer, and beg'd the poor Child might not suffer too much for
its Mother's Misfortunes.
    I now made her a Visit, and I found that she drove something of the old
Trade still, but that she was not in such flourishing Circumstances as before;
for she had been Sued by a certain Gentleman, who had had his Daughter stolen
from him; and who it seems she had helped to convey away; and it was very
narrowly that she escape'd the Gallows; the Expense also had ravag'd her, so that
her House was but meanly Furnished, and she was not in such repute for her
Practice as before; however, she stood upon her Legs, as they say, and as she
was a bustling Woman, and had some Stock left, she was turn'd Pawn Broker, and
liv'd pretty well.
    She receive'd me very civilly, and with her usual obliging manner told me,
she would not have the less respect for me, for my being reduce'd; that she had
taken Care my Boy was very well look'd after, tho' I could not pay for him, and
that the Woman that had him was easy, so that I needed not to Trouble my self
about him, till I might be better able to do it effectually.
    I told her I had not much Money left, but that I had some things that were
Monie's worth, if she could tell me how I might turn them into Money; she ask'd
what it was I had? I pull'd out the string of gold Beads, and told her it was
one of my Husband's Presents to me; then I show'd her the two Parcels of Silk
which I told her I had from Ireland, and brought up to Town with me; and the
little Diamond Ring; as to the small Parcel of Plate and Spoons, I had found
means to dispose of them my self before; and as for the Childbed Linnen I had,
she offer'd me to take it her self, believing it to have been my own; she told
me that she was turn'd Pawn-Broker, and that she would sell those things for me
as pawn'd to her, and so she sent presently for proper Agents that bought them,
being in her Hands, without any scruple, and gave good Prizes too.
    I now began to think this necessary Woman might help me a little in my low
Condition to some Business; for I would gladly have turn'd my Hand to any honest
Employment if I could have got it; but honest Business did not come within her
reach; if I had been younger, perhaps she might have helped me, but my Thoughts
were off of that kind of Livelihood, as being quite out of the way after 50,
which was my Case, and so I told her.
    She invited me at last to come, and be at her House till I could find
something to do, and it should cost me very little, and this I gladly accepted
of; and now living a little easier, I enter'd into some Measures to have my
little Son by my last Husband taken off; and this she made easy too, reserving
a Payment only of 5l. a Year, if I could pay it. This was such a help to me,
that for a good while I left off the wicked Trade that I had so newly taken up;
and gladly I would have got Work, but that was very hard to do for one that had
no Acquaintance.
    However, at last I got some Quilting Work for Ladies Beds, Petticoats, and
the like; and this I lik'd very well and work'd very hard, and with this I began
to live; but the diligent Devil who resolve'd I should continue in his Service,
continually prompted me to go out and take a Walk, that is to say, to see if any
thing would offer in the old Way.
    One Evening I blindly obeyed his Summons, and fetch'd a long Circuit thro'
the Streets, but met with no purchase; but not content with that, I went out the
next Evening too, when going by an Alehouse I saw the Door of a little room
open, next the very Street, and on the Table a silver Tankard, things much in
use in public Houses at that time; it seems some Company had been drinking
there, and the careless Boys had forgot to take it away.
    I went into the Box frankly, and setting the silver Tankard on the Corner of
the Bench, I sat down before it, and knock'd with my Foot, a Boy came presently,
and I bad him fetch me a pint of warm Ale, for it was cold Weather; the Boy run,
and I heard him go down the Cellar to draw the Ale; while the Boy was gone,
another Boy come, and cried, d'ye call, I spoke with a melancholy Air, and
said, no, the Boy is gone for a pint of Ale for me.
    While I sat here, I heard the Woman in the Bar say, are they all gone in the
FIVE, which was the Box I sat in, and the Boy said, yes; who fetch'd the Tankard
away? says the Woman, I did, says another Boy, that's it, pointing it seems to
another Tankard, which he had fetch'd from another Box by Mistake; or else it
must be, that the Rogue forgot that he had not brought it in, which certainly he
had not.
    I heard all this, much to my satisfaction, for I found plainly that the
Tankard was not mist, and yet they concluded it was fetch'd away; so I drank my
Ale, call'd to Pay, and as I went away, I said, take care of your Plate, Child,
meaning a silver pint Mug which he brought me to Drink in; the Boy said, yes,
Madam, very welcome, and away I came.
    I came Home to my Governess, and now I thought it was a time to try her,
that if I might be put to the Necessity of being expos'd she might offer me some
assistance; when I had been at Home some time, and had an opportunity of Talking
to her, I told her I had a Secret of the greatest Consequence in the World to
commit to her, if she had respect enough for me to keep it a Secret: she told me
she had kept one of my Secrets faithfully; why should I doubt her keeping
another? I told her the strangest thing in the World had befallen me, even
without any design; and so told her the whole Story of the Tankard: And have you
brought it away with you my Dear, says she, to be sure I have, says I, and
show'd it her. But what shall I do now, says I, must not I carry it again?
    Carry it again! says she, Ay, if you want to go to Newgate; why, says I,
they can't be so base to stop me, when I carry it to them again? You don't know
those Sort of People Child, says she, they'll not only carry you to Newgate, but
hang you too without any regard to the honesty of returning it; or bring in an
Account of all the other Tankards as they have lost for you to pay for: What
must I do then? says I; Nay, says she, as you have plaid the cunning part and
stole it, you must e'en keep it, there's no going back now; besides Child, says
she, Don't you want it more than they do? I wish you cou'd light of such a
Bargain once a Week.
    This gave me a new Notion of my Governess, and that since she was turn'd
Pawn-Broker, she had a Sort of People about her, that were none of the honest
ones that I had met with there before.
    I had not been long there, but I discover'd it more plainly than before, for
every now and then I saw Hilts of Swords, Spoons, Forks, Tankards, and all such
kind of Ware brought in, not to be Pawn'd, but to be sold down right; and she
bought them all without asking any Questions, but had good Bargains as I found
by her Discourse.
    I found also that in following this Trade, she always melted down the Plate
she bought, that it might not be challeng'd; and she came to me and told me one
Morning that she was going to Melt, and if I would, she would put my Tankard in,
that it might not be seen by any Body; I told her with all my Heart; so she
weigh'd it, and allow'd me the full value in Silver again; but I found she did
not do so to the rest of her Customers.
    Sometime after this, as I was at Work, and very melancholy, she begins to
ask me what the Matter was? I told her my Heart was very heavy, I had little
Work, and nothing to live on, and knew not what Course to take; she laugh'd and
told me I must go out again and try my Fortune; it might be that I might meet
with another Peice of Plate. O, Mother! says I, that is a Trade that I have no
skill in, and if I should be taken I am undone at once; says she, I could help
you to a School-Mistress, that shall make you as dexterous as her self; I
trembled at that Proposal, for hitherto I had had no Confederates, nor any
Acquaintance among that Tribe; but she conquer'd all my Modesty, and all my
Fears; and in a little time, by the help of this Confederate, I grew as impudent
a Thief, and as dexterous, as ever Moll Cut-Purse was, tho' if Fame does not
belie her, not half so Handsome.
    The Comrade she helped me to, dealt in three sorts of Craft. (viz.)
Shop-lifting, stealing of Shop-Books and Pocket-Books, and taking off Gold
Watches from the Ladies Sides; and this last she did so dexterously that no
Woman ever arrive'd to the Perfection of that Art, like her: I lik'd the first
and the last of these things very well, and I attended her some time in the
Practice, just as a Deputy attends a Midwife without any Pay.
    At length she put me to Practice, she had shown me her Art, and I had
several times unhook'd a Watch from her own Side with great dexterity; at last
she show'd me a Prize, and this was a Young lady with Child who had a charming
Watch, the thing was to be done as she came out of the Church; she goes on one
side of the Lady, and pretends, just as she came to the Steps, to fall, and fell
against the Lady with so much violence as put her into a great fright, and both
cry'd out terribly: in the very moment that she jostl'd the Lady, I had hold of
the Watch, and holding it the right way, the start she gave drew the Hook out
and she never felt it; I made off immediately, and left my School-Mistress to
come out of her Fright gradually, and the Lady too; and presently the Watch was
miss'd; ay, says my Comrade, then it was those Rogues that thrust me down, I
warrant ye; I wonder the Gentle-woman did not miss her Watch before, then we
might have taken them.
    She humour'd the thing so well that no Body suspected her, and I was got
home a full Hour before her: This was my first Adventure in Company; the Watch
was indeed a very fine one, and had many Trinkets about it, and my Governess
allow'd us 20l. for it, of which I had half, and thus I was enter'd a complete
Thief, harden'd to a Pitch above all the Reflections of Conscience or Modesty,
and to a Degree which I never thought possible in me.
    Thus the Devil who began, by the help of an irresistible Poverty, to push me
into this Wickedness, brought me on to a height beyond the common Rate, even
when my Necessities were not so terrifying; for I had now got into a little Vein
of Work, and as I was not at a loss to handle my Needle, it was very probable I
might have got my Bread honestly enough.
    I must say, that if such a prospect of Work had presented it self at first,
when I began to feel the approach of my miserable Circumstances; I say, had such
a prospect of getting Bread by working presented it self then, I had never
fallen into this wicked Trade, or into such a wicked Gang as I was now embark'd
with; but practice had hardened me, and I grew audacious to the last degree; and
the more so, because I had carried it on so long, and had never been taken; for
in a word, my new Partner in Wickedness and I went on together so long, without
being ever detected, that we not only grew Bold, but we grew Rich, and we had at
one time One and Twenty Gold Watches in our Hands.
    I remember that one Day being a little more serious than ordinary, and
finding I had so good a Stock beforehand, as I had, for I had near 200l. in
Money for my Share; it came strongly into my Mind, no doubt from some kind
Spirit, if such there be; that as at first Poverty excited me, and my Distresses
drove me to these dreadful Shifts; so seeing those Distresses were now relieved,
and I could also get something towards a Maintenance by working, and had so good
a Bank to support me, why should I not now leave off, while I was well; that I
could not expect to go always free; and if I was once surpris'd, I was undone.
    This was doubtless the happy Minute, when, if I had hearken'd to the blessed
hint from whatsoever hand it came, I had still a cast for an easy Life; but my
Fate was otherwise determin'd, the busie Devil that drew me in, had too fast
hold of me to let me go back; but as Poverty brought me in, so Avarice kept me
in, till there was no going back; as to the Arguments which my Reason dictated
for perswading me to lay down, Avarice stepped in and said, go on, you have had
very good luck, go on till you have gotten Four or Five Hundred Pound, and then
you shall leave off, and then you may live easy without working at all.
    Thus I that was once in the Devil's Clutches, was held fast there as with a
Charm, and had no Power to go without the Circle, till I was ingulph'd in
Labyrinths of Trouble too great to get out at all.
    However, these Thoughts left some Impression upon me, and made me act with
some more caution than before, and more than my Directors us'd for themselves.
My Comerade, as I called her, she should have been called my Teacher, with
another of her Scholars, was the first in the Misfortune; for happening to be
upon the hunt for Purchase, they made an attempt upon a Linnen-Draper in
Cheapside, but were snap'd by a Hawk's-ey'd Journey-man, and seize'd with two
pieces of Cambrick, which were taken also upon them.
    This was enough to Lodge them both in Newgate, where they had the Misfortune
to have some of their former Sins brought to remembrance; two other Indictments
being brought against them, and the Facts being prov'd upon them, they were both
condemn'd to Die; they both pleaded their Bellies and were both voted Quick with
Child; tho' my Tutress was no more with Child than I was.
    I went frequently to see them, and Condole with them, expecting that it
would be my turn next; but the place gave me so much Horror, reflecting that it
was the place of my unhappy Birth, and of my Mother's Misfortunes, that I could
not bear it, so I left off going to see them.
    And O! cou'd I but have taken warning by their Disasters, I had been happy
still, for I was yet free, and had nothing brought against me; but it could not
be, my Measure was not yet fill'd up.
    My Comerade, having the Brand of an old Offender, was Executed; the young
Offender was spar'd, having obtained a Reprieve; but lay starving a long while
in Prison, till at last she got her Name into what they call a Circuit Pardon,
and so came off.
    This terrible Example of my Comrade frighted me heartily, and for a good
while I made no Excursions; but one Night, in the Neighbourhood of my
Governesses House, they cry'd, Fire; my Governess look'd out, for we were all
up, and cry'd immediately that such a Gentlewoman's House was all of a light
Fire a top, and so indeed it was: Here she gives me a jog, now, Child, says she,
there is a rare opportunity, the Fire being so near that you may go to it before
the Street is block'd up with the Crowd; she presently gave me my Cue, go,
Child, says she, to the House, and run in and tell the Lady, or any Body you
see, that you come to help them, and that you came from such a Gentlewoman (that
is, one of her Acquaintance farther up the Street).
    Away I went, and coming to the House I found them all in Confusion, you may
be sure; I run in, and finding one of the Maids, alas! Sweetheart, said I, how
came this dismal Accident? where is your Mistress? Is she safe? And where are
the Children? I come from Madam - to help you; away runs the Maid, Madam, madam,
says she, screaming as loud as she cou'd yell, here is a Gentlewoman come from
Madam - to help us: The poor Woman half out of her Wits, with a Bundle under her
Arm, and two little Children, comes towards me, Madam, says I, let me carry the
poor Children to Madam -, she desires you to send them; she'll take care of the
poor Lambs, and so I takes one of them out of her Hand, and she lifts the tother
up into my Arms; ay, do, for God sake, says she, carry them; O thank her for her
kindness: Have you anything else to secure, Madam? says I, she will take care of
it: O dear! says she, God bless her, take this bundle of Plate and carry it to
her too; O she is a good Woman; O, we are utterly ruin'd, undone; and away she
runs from me out of her Wits, and the Maids after her, and away comes I with the
two Children and the Bundle.
    I was no sooner got into the Street, but I saw another Woman come to me; O!
says she, Mistress, in a piteous Tone, you will let fall the Child; come, come,
this is a sad time, let me help you, and immediately lays hold of my Bundle to
carry it for me; no, says I, if you will help me, take the Child by the Hand,
and lead it for me but to the upper end of the Street, I'll go with you and
satisfie you for your pains.
    She cou'd not avoid going, after what I said, but the Creature, in short,
was one of the same Business with me, and wanted nothing but the Bundle;
however, she went with me to the Door, for she cou'd not help it; when we were
come there I whisper'd her, go Child, said I, I understand your Trade, you may
meet with Purchase enough.
    She understood me and walk'd off; I thundered at the Door with the Children,
and as the People were raise'd before by the noise of the Fire, I was soon let
in, and I said, is Madam awake, pray tell her Mrs. - desires the favour of her
to take the two Children in; poor Lady, she will be undone, their House is all
of a Flame; they took the Children in very civily, pitied the Family in
Distress, and away came I with my Bundle; one of the Maids ask'd me, if I was
not to leave the Bundle too; I said no, Sweetheart, 'tis to go to another Place,
it does not belong to them.
    I was a great way out of the hurry now, and so I went on, and brought the
Bundle of Plate, which was very considerable, strait home, to my old Governess;
she told me she would not look into it, but bad me go again and look for more.
    She gave me the like Cue to the Gentlewoman of the next House to that which
was on Fire, and I did my endeavour to go, but by this time the allarm of Fire
was so great, and so many Engines playing and the Street so throng'd with
People, that I cou'd not get near the House, whatever I cou'd do; so I came back
again to my Governesses, and taking the Bundle up into my Chamber, I began to
examine it: It is with Horror that I tell what a Treasure I found there; 'tis
enough to say, that besides most of the Family Plate, which was considerable, I
found a Gold Chain, an old-fashion'd thing, the Locket of which was broken, so
that I suppose it had not been us'd some Years, but the Gold was not the worse
for that; also a little Box of burying Rings, the Lady's Wedding-Ring, and some
broken bits of old Lockets of Gold, a Gold Watch, and a Purse with about 24l.
value in old Pieces of Gold Coin, and several other things of Value.
    This was the greatest and the worst Prize that ever I was concern'd in, for
indeed, tho', as I have said above, I was harden'd now beyond the Power of all
Reflection in other Cases, yet it really touch'd me to the very Soul, when I
look'd into this Treasure; to think of the poor disconsolate Gentlewoman who had
lost so much besides; and who would think to be sure that she had save'd her
Plate and best things; how she wou'd be Surprise'd when she should find that she
had been deceive'd, and that the Person that took her Children and her Goods, had
not come, as was pretended, from the Gentlewoman in next Street, but that the
Children had been put upon her without her own knowledge.
    I say, I confess the inhumanity of this Action mov'd me very much, and made
me relent exceedingly, and Tears stood in my Eyes upon that Subject: But with
all my Sense of its being cruel and Inhuman, I cou'd never find in my Heart to
make any Restitution: The Reflection wore off, and I quickly forgot the
Circumstances that attended it.
    Nor was this all, for tho' by this jobb I was become considerably Richer
than before, yet the Resolution I had formerly taken of leaving off this horrid
Trade, when I had gotten a little more did not return; but I must still get
more; and the Avarice had such Success, that I had no more Thoughts of coming to
a timely Alteration of Life; tho' without it I cou'd expect no Safety, no
Tranquility in the Possession of what I had gain'd; a little more, and a little
more, was the Case still.
    At length yielding to the Importunities of my Crime, I cast off all Remorse
and all the Reflections on that Head, turn'd to no more than this, that I might
perhaps come to have one Booty more that might complete all; but tho' I
certainly had that one Booty, yet every hit look'd towards another, and was so
encouraging to me to go on with the Trade, that I had no Gust to the laying it
down.
    In this Condition, harden'd by Success, and resolving to go on, I fell into
the Snare in which I was appointed to meet with my last Reward for this kind of
Life: But even this was not yet, for I met with several successful Adventures
more in this way.
    My Governess was for awhile really concern'd for this Misfortune of my
Comerade that had been hang'd, for she knew enough of my Governess to have sent
her the same way, and which made her very uneasy; indeed she was in a very great
fright.
    It is true, that when she was gone and had not told what she knew; My
Governess was easy as to that Point, and perhaps glad she was hang'd; for it was
in her power to have obtain'd a Pardon at the Expense of her Friends; But, the
loss of her, and the Sense of her Kindness in not making her Market of what she
knew, mov'd my Governess to Mourn very sincerely for her: I comforted her as
well as I cou'd, and she in return harden'd me to Merit more completely the same
Fate.
    However as I had said it made me the more wary, and particularly I was very
shie of Shop-lifting, especially among the Mercers and Drapers who are a Set of
Fellows, that have their Eyes very much about them: I made a Venture or two
among the Lace Folks, and the Mileners, and particularly at one Shop, where two
young Women were newly set up, and [had] notbeenbred to Trade: There, I carried
off a Peice of Bonelace, worth six or seven Pound, and a Paper of Thread; but
this was but once, it was a Trick that would not serve again.
    It was always reckon'd a safe Job when we heard of a new Shop, and
especially, when the People were such as were not bred to Shops; such may depend
upon it, that they will be visited once or twice at their beginning, and they
must be very Sharp indeed if they can prevent it.
    I made another Adventure or two after this, but they were but Trifles:
Nothing considerable offering for a good while; I began to think that I must
give over Trade in Earnest; but my Governess, who was not willing to lose me,
and expected great Things of me, brought me one Day into Company with a young
Woman and a Fellow that went for her Husband, tho' as it appear'd afterwards she
was not his Wife, but they were Partners in the Trade they carried on; and in
something else too. In short, they robb'd together, lay together, were taken
together, and at last were hang'd together.
    I came into a kind of League with these two by the help of my Governess, and
they carried me out into three or four Adventures, where I rather saw them
commit some Coarse and unhandy Robberies, in which nothing but a great Stock of
impudence on their Side, and gross Negligence on the Peoples Side who were
robb'd, could have made them Successful; so I resolve'd from that time forward to
be very Cautious how I Adventur'd with them; and indeed when two or three
unlucky Projects were propos'd by them, I decline'd the offer, and persuaded them
against it: One time they particularly propos'd Robbing a Watchmaker of 3 Gold
Watches, which they had Ey'd in the Day time, and found the Place where he laid
them; one of them had so many Keys of all kinds, that he made no Question to
open the Place, where the Watchmaker had laid them; and so we made a kind of an
Appointment; but when I came to look narrowly into the Thing, I found they
propos'd breaking open the House, and this I would not Embark in, so they went
without me: They did get into the House by main Force, and broke up the lock'd
Place where the Watches were, but found but one of the Gold Watches, and a
Silver one, which they took, and got out of the House again very clear; but the
Family being alarm'd cried out Thieves, and the Man was pursued and taken, the
young Woman had got off too, but unhappily was stop'd at a Distance, and the
Watches found upon her; and thus I had a second Escape, for they were convicted,
and both hang'd, being old Offenders, tho' but young People; and as I said
before, that they robb'd together, so now they hang'd together, and there ended
my new Partnership.
    I began now to be very wary, having so narrowly escape'd a Scouring, and
having such an Example before me; but I had a new Tempter, who prompted me every
day, I mean my Governess; and now a Prize presented, which as it came by her
Management, so she expected a good Share of the Booty; there was a good Quantity
of Flanders-Lace lodge'd in a private House, where she had heard of it; and
Flanders Lace, being Prohibited, it was a good Booty to any Custom-House Officer
that could come at it: I had a full Account from my Governess, as well of the
Quantity as of the very Place, where it was conceal'd, so I went to a
Custom-House Officer, and told him, I had a Discovery to make to him, if he
would assure me that I should have my due Share of the Reward: This was so just
an offer, that nothing could be fairer; so he agreed, and taking a Constable,
and me with him, we beset the House; as I told him, I could go directly to the
Place, he left it to me, and the Hole being very dark, I squeez'd myself into
it, with a Candle in my Hand, and so reach'd the Peices out to him, taking care,
as I gave him some, so to secure as much about myself as I could conveniently
Dispose of: There was near 300l. worth of Lace in the whole; and I secure'd about
50l. worth of it myself. The People of the House were not owners of the Lace,
but a Merchant who had entrusted them with it; so that they were not so
Surprise'd as I thought they would be.
    I left the Officer overjoy'd with his Prize, and fully satisfy'd with what
he had got, and appointed to meet him at a House of his own directing, where I
came after I had dispos'd of the Cargo I had about me, of which he had not the
least Suspicion; when I came, he began to Capitulate, believing I did not
understand the right I had in the Prize, and would fain have put me off with
Twenty Pound, but I let him know that I was not so ignorant as he suppose'd I
was; and yet I was glad too, that he offer'd to bring me to a certainty; I asked
100l. and he rose up to 30l.; I fell to 80l. and he rose again to 40l.; in a
Word, he offered 50l. and I consented, only demanding a Peice of Lace, which I
thought came to about 8 or 9 Pound, as if it had been for my own Wear, and he
agreed to it, so I got 50l. in Money paid me that same Night, and made an End of
the Bargain; nor did he ever know who I was, or where to enquire for me; so that
if it had been discover'd, that part of the Goods were embezzel'd; he could have
made no Challenge upon me for it.
    I very punctually divided this Spoil with my Governess, and I pass'd with
her from this time for a very dexterous Manager in the nicest Cases; I found
that this last was the best, and easiest sort of Work that was in my way, and I
made it my business to enquire out prohibited Goods; and after buying some
usually betray'd them, but none of these Discoveries amounted to any thing
considerable, not like that I related just now; but I was Cautious of running
the great Risques which I found others did, and in which they Miscarried every
Day.
    The next thing of Moment, was an attempt at a Gentlewoman's gold Watch, it
happen'd in a Crowd, at a Meeting-House, where I was in very great Danger of
being taken; I had full hold of her Watch, but giving a great Jostle, as if some
body had thrust me against her, and in the Juncture giving the Watch a fair
pull, I found it would not come, so I let it go that Moment, and cried as if I
had been kill'd, that somebody had Trod upon my Foot, and that there was
certainly Pick-pockets there; for some body or other had given a pull at my
Watch, for you are to observe, that on these Adventures we always went very well
Dress'd, and I had very good Cloths on, and a Gold Watch by my Side, as like a
Lady as other Folks.
    I had no sooner said so, but the other Gentlewoman cried out a Pick-pocket
too, for some body, she said, had try'd to pull her Watch away.
    When I touch'd her Watch, I was close to her, but when I cry'd out, I stop'd
as it were short, and the Crowd bearing her forward a little, she made a Noise
too, but it was at some Distance from me, so that she did not in the least
suspect me, but when she cried out a Pick-pocket, some body cried out Ay, and
here has been another, this Gentlewoman has been attempted too.
    At that very instant, a little farther in the Crowd, and very Luckily too,
they cried out a Pick-pocket again, and really seize'd a young Fellow in the very
Fact. This, tho' unhappy for the Wretch, was very opportunely for my Case, tho'
I had carried it handsomely enough before, but now it was out of Doubt, and all
the loose part of the Crowd ran that way, and the poor Boy was deliver'd up to
the Rage of the Street, which is a Cruelty I need not describe, and which
however, they are always glad of, rather than be sent to Newgate, where they lie
often a long time, and sometimes they are hang'd, and the best they can look
for, if they are Convicted, is to be Transported.
    This was a narrow Escape to me, and I was so frighted, that I venture'd no
more at Gold Watches a great while; there were indeed many Circumstances in this
Adventure, which assisted to my Escape; but the chief was, that the Woman whose
Watch I had pull'd at was a Fool; that is to say, she was Ignorant of the nature
of the Attempt, which one would have thought she should not have been, seeing
she was wise enough to fasten her Watch, so that it could not be splipped up; but
she was in such a Fright, that she had no Thought about her; for she, when she
felt the pull scream'd out, and push'd herself forward, and put all the People
about her into disorder, but said not a Word of her Watch, or of a Pick-pocket,
for at least two Minutes; which was time enough for me, and to spare; for as I
had cried out behind her, as I have said, and bore myself back in the Crowd as
she bore forward, there were several People, at least seven or eight, the Throng
being still moving on, that were got between me and her in that time, and then I
crying out a Pick-pocket, rather sooner than she, she might as well be the
Person suspected as I, and the People were confuse'd in their Enquiry; whereas,
had she with a Presence of Mind needful on such an Occasion, as soon as she felt
the pull, not skream'd out as she did, but turn'd immediately round, and seize'd
the next Body that was behind her, she had infallibly taken me.
    This is a Direction not of the kindest Sort to the Fraternity; but 'tis
certainly a Key to the Clue of a Pick-pocket's Motions, and whoever can follow
it, will as certainly catch the Thief as he will be sure to miss if he does not.
    I had another Adventure, which puts this Matter out of doubt, and which may
be an Instruction for Posterity in the Case of a Pick-pocket; my good old
Governess to give a short touch at her History, tho' she had left off the Trade,
was as I may say, born a Pick-pocket, and as I understood afterwards, had run
thro' all the several Degrees of that Art, and yet had been taken but once; when
she was so grossly detected, that she was convicted and order'd to be
Transported; but being a Woman of a rare Tongue, and withal having Money in her
Pocket; she found Means, the Ship putting into Ireland for Provisions, to get on
Shore there, where she practised her old Trade some Years; when falling into
another sort of Company she turned Midwife and Procuress, and play'd a hundred
Pranks, which she gave me a little History of, in Confidence between us as we
grew more intimate; and it was to this wicked Creature that I ow'd all the
Dexterity I arrive'd to, in which there were few that ever went beyond me, or
that practis'd so long without any Misfortune.
    It was after those Adventures in Ireland, and when she was pretty well known
in that Country, that she left Dublin, and came over to England, where the time
of her Transportation being not expir'd, she left her former Trade, for fear of
falling into bad Hands again, for then she was sure to have gone to Wreck: Here
she set up the same Trade she had followed in Ireland, in which she soon, by her
admirable Management, and a good Tongue, arrived to the Height, which I have
already describe'd, and indeed began to be Rich, tho' her Trade fell again
afterwards.
    I mention thus much of the History of this Woman here, the better to account
for the concern she had in the wicked Life I was now leading; into all the
Particulars of which she lead me, as it were, by the Hand, and gave me such
Directions, and I so well follow'd them, that I grew the greatest Artist of my
time, and work'd myself out of every Danger with such Dexterity, that when
several more of my Comrades run themselves into Newgate, by that time they had
been half a Year at the Trade: I had now practis'd upwards of five Year, and the
People at Newgate did not so much as know me; they had heard much of me indeed,
and often expected me there; but I always got off, tho' many times in the
extreamest Danger.
    One of the greatest Dangers I was now in, was that I was too well known
among the Trade, and some of them whose hatred was owing rather to Envy, than
any Injury I had done them began to be Angry, that I should always Escape when
they were always catch'd and hurried to Newgate. These were they that gave me
the Name of Moll Flanders: For it was no more of Affinity with my real Name, or
with any of the Names I had ever gone by, than black is of Kin to white, except
that once, as before I call'd my self Mrs. Flanders, when I sheltered my self in
the Mint; but that these Rogues never knew, nor could I ever learn how they came
to give me the Name, or what the Occasion of it was.
    I was soon inform'd that some of these who were gotten fast into Newgate,
had vowed to Impeach me; and as I knew that two or three of them were but too
able to do it, I was under a great concern, and kept within Doors for a good
while; but my Governess who was Partner in my Success, and who now plaid a sure
Game, for she had no Share in the hazard, I say, my Governess was something
impatient of my leading such a useless unprofitable Life, as she call'd it; and
she laid a new Contrivance for my going Abroad, and this was to Dress me up in
Men's Cloths, and so put me into a new kind of Practice.
    I was Tall and Personable, but a little too smooth Fac'd for a Man; however,
as I seldom went Abroad, but in the Night it did well enough; but it was long
before I could behave in my new clothes; it was impossible to be so Nimble, so
Ready, so Dexterous at these things, in a Dress contrary to Nature; and as I did
every thing Clumsily, so I had neither the success, or easiness of Escape that I
had before, and I resolve'd to leave it off; but that Resolution was confirm'd
soon after by the following Accident.
    As my Governess had disguis'd me like a Man, so she joyn'd me with a Man, a
young Fellow that was Nimble enough at his Business, and for about three Weeks
we did very well together. Our principal Trade was watching Shop-Keepers
Compters, and Slipping off any kinds of Goods we could see carelessly laid any
where, and we made several good Bargains as we call'd them at this Work: And as
we kept always together, so we grew very intimate, yet he never knew that I was
not a Man; nay, tho' I several times went home with him to his Lodgings,
according as our business directed, and four or five times lay with him all
Night: But our Design lay another way, and it was absolutely necessary to me to
conceal my Sex from him, as appear'd afterwards: The circumstances of our
Living, coming in late, and having such Business to do as require'd that no Body
should be trusted with coming into into our Lodgings, were such as made it
impossible to me to refuse lying with him, unless I would have own'd my Sex, and
as it was I effectually conceal'd my self.
    But his ill, and my good Fortune, soon put an end to this Life, which I must
own I was sick of too: We had made several Prizes in this new way of Business,
but the last would have been extraordinary; there was a Shop in a certain Street
which had a Warehouse behind it that look'd into another Street, the House
making the Corner.
    Through the Window of the Warehouse we saw lying on the Compter or
Show-board which was just before it, five peices of Silks, besides other Stuffs;
and tho' it was almost dark, yet the People being busie in the fore Shop had not
had time to shut up those Windows, or else had forgot it.
    This the young Fellow was so overjoy'd with, that he could not restrain
himself, it lay within his reach he said, and he swore violently to me that he
would have it, if he broke down the House for it; I dissuaded him a little, but
saw there was no Remedy, so he run rashly upon it, splipped out a Square out of the
Sash Window dexterously enough, and got four Peices of the silks, and came with
them towards me, but was immediately persued with a terrible Clutter and Noise;
we were standing together indeed, but I had not taken any of the Goods out of
his Hand, when I said to him hastily, you are undone! he run like Lightning, and
I too, but the pursuit was hotter after him, because he had the Goods; he dropped
two of the Peices, which stop'd them a little, but the crowd encreas'd, and
pursued us both; they took him soon after with the other two Peices, and then
the rest follow'd me; I run for it and got into my Governesses House, whether
some quick-ey'd People follow'd me so warmly as to fix me there; they did not
immediately knock at the Door, by which I got time to throw off my Disguise, and
dress me in my own clothes; besides, when they came there, my Governess, who had
her Tale ready, kept her Door shut, and call'd out to them and told them there
was no Man came in there; the People affirm'd there did a Man come in there, and
swore they would break open the Door.
    My Governess, not at all Surprise'd, spoke calmly to them, told them they
should very freely come and search her House, if they would bring a Constable,
and let in none but such as the Constable would admit, for it was unreasonable
to let in a whole Crowd; this they could not refuse, tho' they were a Crowd; so
a Constable was fetch'd immediately, and she very freely open'd the Door, the
Constable kept the Door, and the Men he appointed search'd the House, my
Governess going with them from Room to Room; when she came to my Room she call'd
to me, and said aloud; Cousin, pray open the Door, here's some Gentlemen that
must come and look into your Room.
    I had a little Girl with me, which was my Governesses Grand-child, as she
call'd her; and I bad her open the Door, and there sat I at work with a great
litter of things about me, as if I had been at Work all Day, being undress'd,
with only Night-clothes on my Head, and a loose Morning Gown about me: My
Governess made a kind of excuse for their disturbing me, telling partly the
occasion of it, and that she had no Remedy but to open the Doors to them, and
let them satisfie themselves, for all she could say would not satisfie them: I
sat still, and bid them search if they pleas'd, for if there was any Body in the
House, I was sure they was not in my Room; and for the rest of the House I had
nothing to say to that, I did not understand what they look'd for.
    Every thing look'd so innocent and so honest about me, that they treated me
civiller than I expected, but it was not till they had search'd the Room to a
nicety, even under the Bed, and in the Bed, and every where else, where it was
possible any thing cou'd be hid; when they had done and cou'd find nothing, they
ask'd my Pardon, and went down.
    When they had thus searched the House from Bottom to Top, and then from Top
to Bottom, and cou'd find nothing, they appeas'd the Mob pretty well; but they
carried my Governess before the Justice: Two Men swore that they see the Man,
who they pursued, go into her House: My Governess rattled and made a great noise
that her House should be insulted, and that she should be used thus for nothing;
that if a Man did come in, he might go out again presently for ought she knew,
for she was ready to make Oath that no Man had been within her Doors all that
Day as she knew of; which was very true; that it might be, that as she was above
Stairs, any Fellow in a Fright might find the Door open, and run in for shelter
when he was pursued, but that she knew nothing of it; and if it had been so, he
certainly went out again, perhaps at the other Door, for she had another Door
into an Alley, and so had made his escape.
    This was indeed probable enough, and the Justice satisfied himself with
giving her an Oath, that she had not receive'd or admitted any Man into her House
to conceal him, or protect or hide him from Justice: This Oath she might justly
take, and did so, and so she was dismiss'd.
    It is easy to judge what a fright I was in upon this occasion, and it was
impossible for my Governess ever to bring me to Dress in that Disguise again;
for, as I told her, I should certainly betray myself.
    My poor Partner in this Mischief was now in a bad Case, for he was carry'd
away before my Lord Mayor, and by his Worship committed to Newgate, and the
People that took him were so willing, as well as able, to Prosecute him, that
they offer'd themselves to enter into Recognisances to appear at the Sessions,
and persue the Charge against him.
    However, he got his Indictment deferr'd, upon promise to discover his
Accomplices, and particularly, the Man that was concern'd with him in this
Robbery, and he fail'd not to do his Endeavour, for he gave in my Name, who he
call'd Gabriel Spencer, which was the Name I went by to him, and here appear'd
the Wisdom of my concealing my self from him, without which I had been undone.
    He did all he could to discover this Gabriel Spencer; he describe'd me; he
discover'd the Place where he said I Lodg'd; and in a Word, all the Particulars
that he could of my Dwelling; but having conceal'd the main Circumstances of my
Sex from him; I had a vast Advantage, and he could never hear of me; he brought
two or three Families into trouble, by his Endeavouring to find me out, but they
knew nothing of me, any more than that he had a Fellow with him, that they had
seen, but knew nothing of; and as to my Governess, tho' she was the Means of his
coming to me, yet it was done at second Hand, and he knew nothing of her
neither.
    This turn'd to his Disadvantage; for having promise'd Discoveries, but not
being able to make it good, it was look'd upon as trifling, and he was the more
fiercely persued by the Shopkeeper.
    I was however terribly uneasy all this while, and that I might be quite out
of the Way, I went away from my Governess for a while; but not knowing whither
to wander, I took a Maid Servant with me, and took the Stage-Coach to Dunstable
to my old Landlord and Landlady, where I lived so handsomely with my Lancashire
Husband: Here I told her a formal Story, that I expected my Husband every day
from Ireland, and that I had sent a Letter to him, that I would meet him at
Dunstable at her House, and that he would certainly Land if the Wind was fair,
in a few Days; so that I was come to spend a few Days with them till he could
come, for he would either come Post, or in the West-Chester Coach, I knew not
which, but which soever it was, he would be sure to come to that House to meet
me.
    My Landlady was mighty glad to see me, and my Landlord made such a Stir with
me, that if I had been a Princess I could not have been better used, and here I
might have been Welcome a Month or two if I had thought fit.
    But my Business was of another Nature, I was very uneasy, (though so well
disguis'd that it was scarce possible to Detect me) least this Fellow should
find me out; and tho' he could not charge me with the Robbery, having persuaded
him not to venture, and having done nothing of it myself, yet he might have
charge'd me with other Things, and have bought his own Life at the Expense of
mine.
    This fill'd me with horrible Apprehensions: I had no Recourse, no Friend, no
Confident but my old Governess, and I knew no Remedy but to put my Life into her
Hands; and so I did, for I let her know where to send to me, and had several
Letters from her while I stay'd here, some of them almost scar'd me out of my
Wits; but at last she sent me the joyful News that he was Hang'd, which was the
Best News to me that I had heard a great while.
    I had stay'd here five Weeks, and liv'd very comfortably indeed (the secret
Anxiety of my Mind excepted) but when I receive'd this Letter I look'd pleasantly
again, and told my Landlady that I had receive'd a Letter from my Spouse in
Ireland, that I had the good News of his being very well, but had the bad News
that his Business would not permit him to come away so soon as he expected, and
so I was like to go back again without him.
    My Landlady complimented me upon the good News however, that I had heard he
was well, for I have observe'd Madam, says she, you han't been so pleasant as you
us'd to be; you have been over Head and Ears in Care for him, I dare say, says
the good Woman; 'tis easy to be seen there's an Alteration in you for the
better, says she: Well, I am sorry the Esquire can't come yet, says my Landlord;
I should have been heartily glad to have seen him, when you have certain News of
his coming, you'll take a Step hither again, Madam, says he, you shall be very
welcome whenever you please to come.
    With all these fine Complements we parted, and I came merry enough to London
, and found my Governess as well pleas'd as I was; and now she told me she would
never recommend any Partner to me again, for she always found, she said, that I
had the best Luck when I venture'd by my self; and so indeed I had, for I was
seldom in any Danger when I was by my self, or if I was, I got out of it with
more Dexterity than when I was entangled with the dull Measures of other People,
who had perhaps less forecast, and were more impatient than I; for tho' I had as
much Courage to Venture as any of them, yet I us'd more Caution before I
undertook a Thing, and had more Presence of Mind to bring my self off.
    I have often wondered even at my own hardiness another way, that when all my
Companions were Surprise'd, and fell so suddenly into the Hand of Justice, yet I
could not all this while enter into one serious Resolution to leave off this
Trade; and especially considering that I was now very far from being Poor, that
the Temptation of Necessity, which is the general Introduction of all such
Wickedness, was now removed; that I had near 500l. by me in ready Money, on
which I might have liv'd very well, if I had thought fit to have retire'd; but, I
say, I had not so much as the least Inclination to leave off; no, not so much as
I had before, when I had but 200l. beforehand, and when I had no such frightful
Examples before my Eyes as these were: From hence 'tis evident, that when once
we are harden'd in Crime, no Fear can affect us, no Example give us any Warning.
    I had indeed one Comrade, whose Fate went very near me for a good while,
tho' I wore it off too in Time, that Case was indeed very unhappy; I had made a
Prize of a Piece of very good Damask in a Mercer's Shop, and went clear off my
self; but had convey'd the Piece to this Companion of mine, when we went out of
the Shop; and she went one way, I went another: We had not been long out of the
Shop, but the Mercer mist the Piece of Stuff, and sent his Messengers, one, one
way, and one another, and they presently seize'd her that had the Piece, with the
Damask upon her; as for me, I had very luckily stepped into a House where there
was a Lace Chamber, up one Pair of Stairs, and had the Satisfaction, or the
Terror indeed of looking out of the Window, and seeing the poor Creature drag'd
away to the Justice, who immediately committed her to Newgate.
    I was careful to attempt nothing in the Lace-Chamber, but tumbl'd their
Goods pretty much to spend Time; then bought a few Yards of Edging, and paid for
it, and came away very sad Hearted indeed; for the poor Woman, who was in
Tribulation, for what I only had stolen.
    Here again my old Caution stood me in good stead; tho' I often robb'd with
these People, yet I never let them know who I was; nor could they ever find out
my Lodging, tho' they often endeavour'd to watch me to it. They all knew me by
the Name of Moll Flanders, tho' even some of them rather believe'd I was she,
than knew me to be so; my Name was public among them indeed; but how to find me
out they knew not, nor so much as how to guess at my Quarters, whether they were
at the East End of the Town, or the West; and this Wariness was my Safety upon
all these Occasions.
    I kept close a great while upon the Occasion of this Woman's Disaster; I
knew that if I should do any thing that should miscarry, and should be carry'd
to Prison she would be there, and ready to witness against me, and perhaps save
her Life at my Expense; I consider'd that I began to be very well known by Name
at the Old Baily, tho' they did not know my Face; and that if I should fall into
their Hands, I should be treated as an old Offender; and for this Reason, I was
resolve'd to see what this poor Creatures Fate should be before I stirr'd, tho'
several times in her Distress I convey'd Money to her for her Relief.
    At length she came to her Tryal, she pleaded she did not steal the Things;
but that one Mrs. Flanders as she heard her call'd (for she did not know her)
gave the Bundle to her after they came out of the Shop, and bad her carry it
Home. They ask'd her where this Mrs. Flanders was? But she could not produce
her, neither could she give the least Account of me; and the Mercer's Men
swearing positively that she was in the Shop when the Goods were stolen; that
they immediately miss'd them, and pursue'd her, and found them upon her;
thereupon the Jury brought her in Guilty, but the Court considering that she
really was not the Person that Stole the Goods, and that it was very possible
she could not find out this Mrs. Flanders, meaning me, tho' it would save her
Life, which indeed was true; they allow'd her to be Transported, which was the
utmost Favour she could obtain, only that the Court told her, if she could in
the mean time produce the said Mrs. Flanders, they would intercede for her
Pardon, that is to say, if she could find me out, and hang me, she should not be
Transported: This I took care to make impossible to her, and so she was Shipp'd
off in pursuance of her Sentence a little while after.
    I must repeat it again, that the Fate of this poor Woman troubl'd me
exceedingly; and I began to be very pensive, knowing that I was really the
Instrument of her disaster; but my own Life, which was so evidently in Danger,
took off my tenderness; and seeing she was not put to Death, I was easy at her
Transportation, because she was then out of the way of doing me any Mischief
whatever should happen.
    The Disaster of this Woman was some Months before that of the last recited
Story, and was indeed partly the Occasion of my Governess proposing to Dress me
up in Men's Cloths, that I might go about unobserv'd; but I was soon tir'd of
that Disguise, as I have said, for it expos'd me to too many Difficulties.
    I was now easy, as to all Fear of Witnesses against me, for all those, that
had either been concern'd with me, or that knew me by the Name of Moll Flanders,
were either hang'd or Transported; and if I should have had the Misfortune to be
taken, I might call myself any thing else, as well as Moll Flanders, and no old
Sins could be plac'd to my Account; so I began to run a Tick again, with the
more freedom, and several successful Adventures I made tho' not such as I had
made before.
    We had at that time another Fire happen'd not a great way off from the Place
where my Governess liv'd, and I made an attempt there as before, but as I was
not soon enough before the Crowd of People came in, and could not get to the
House I aim'd at; instead of a Prize, I got a mischief, which had almost put a
Period to my Life and all my wicked doings together; for the Fire being very
furious, and the People inagreat Fright in removing their Goods, and throwing
them out of Window; a Wench from out of a Window threw a Featherbed just upon
me; it is true, the Bed being soft it broke no Bones: but as the weight was
great, and made greater by the Fall, it beat me down, and laid me dead for a
while: nor did the People concern themselves much to deliver me from it, or to
recover me at all; but I lay like one Dead and neglected a good while; till some
body going to remove the Bed out of the way, helped me up; it was indeed a
wonder the People in the House had not thrown other Goods out after it, and
which might have fallen upon it, and then I had been inevitably kill'd; but I
was reserve'd for further Afflictions.
    This Accident however spoil'd my Market for that time, and I came Home to my
Governess very much hurt, and Frighted, and it was a good while before she could
set me upon my Feet again.
    It was now a Merry time of the Year, and Bartholomew Fair was begun; I had
never made any Walks that Way, nor was the Fair of much Advantage to me; but I
took a turn this Year into the Cloisters, and there I fell into one of the
Raffling Shops: It was a thing of no great Consequence to me, but there came a
Gentleman extremely well Dress'd, and very Rich, and as 'tis frequent to talk to
every Body in those Shops he singl'd me out, and was very particular with me;
first he told me he would put in for me to Raffle, and did so; and some small
matter coming to his Lot, he presented it to me, I think it was a Feather Muff:
Then he continue'd to keep talking to me with a more than common Appearance of
Respect; but still very civil and much like a Gentleman.
    He held me in talk so long, till at last he drew me out of the Raffling
Place to the Shop-Door, and then to take a walk in the Cloister, still talking
of a Thousand things Cursorily without any thing to the purpose: at last hetold
me that he was charm'd with my Company, and ask'd me if I durst trust myself in
a Coach with him; he told me he was a Man of honour, and would not offer any
thing to me unbecoming him: I seem'd to decline it a while, but suffer'd myself
to be importun'd a little, and then yielded.
    I was at a loss in my Thoughts to conclude at first what this Gentleman
design'd; but I found afterwards he had had some drink in his Head; and that he
was not very unwilling to have some more: He carried me to the Spring Garden, at
Knights-Bridge, where we walk'd in the Gardens, and he Treated me very
handsomely; but I found he drank freely, he pressed me also to drink, but I
decline'd it.
    Hitherto he kept his Word with me, and offer'd me nothing amiss; we came
away in the Coach again, and he brought me into the Streets, and by this time it
was near Ten a Clock at Night, when he stop'd the Coach at a House, where it
seems he was acquainted, and where they made no scruple to show us up Stairs
into a Room with a Bed in it; at first I seem'd to be unwilling to go up, but
after a few Words, I yielded to that too, being indeed willing to see the End of
it, and in Hopes to make something of it at last; as for the Bed, &amp;c., I was
not much concern'd about that Part.
    Here he began to be a little freer with me than he had promise'd; and I by
little and little yielded to every thing, so that in a Word, he did what he
pleas'd with me; I need say no more: All this while he drank freely too, and
about One in the Morning we went into the Coach again: The Air, and the shaking
of the Coach made the Drink get more up in his Head, and he grew uneasy, and was
for acting over again, what he had been doing before; but as I thought my Game
now secure, I resisted, and brought him to be a little still, which had not
lasted five Minutes, but he fell fast asleep.
    I took this opportunity to search him to a Nicety; I took a gold Watch, with
a silk Purse of Gold, his fine full bottom Perrewig, and silver fring'd Gloves,
his Sword, and fine Snuff-box, and gently opening the Coach-door, stood ready to
jump out while the Coach was going on; but the Coach stopping in the narrow
Street beyond Temple-Bar to let another Coach pass, I got softly out, fasten'd
the Door again, and gave my Gentleman and the Coach the slip together.
    This was an Adventure indeed unlook'd for, and perfectly undesign'd by me;
tho' I was not so past the Merry part of Life, as to forget how to behave, when
a Fop so blinded by his Appetite should not know an old Woman from a young: I
did not indeed look so old as I was by ten or twelve Year; yet I was not a young
Wench of Seventeen, and it was easy enough to be distinguish'd: There is
nothing so absurd, so surfeiting, so ridiculous as a man heated by Wine in his
Head, and a wicked Gust in his Inclination together; he is in the possession of
two Devils at once, and can no more govern himself by his Reason than a Mill can
Grind without Water; Vice tramples upon all that was in him that had any good in
it; nay, his very Sense is blinded by its own Rage, and he acts Absurdities even
in his View; such is Drinking more, when he is Drunk already; picking up a
common Woman, without any regard to what she is, or who she is; whether Sound or
Rotten, Clean or Unclean; whether Ugly or Handsome, Old or Young, and so
blinded, as not really to distinguish; such a Man is worse than Lunatick;
prompted by his vicious Head he no more knows what he is doing, than this Wretch
of mine knew when I pick'd his Pocket of his Watch and his Purse of Gold.
    These are the Men of whom Solomon says, they go like an Ox to the slaughter,
till a Dart strikes through their Liver; an admirable Description, by the way,
of the foul Disease, which is a poisonous deadly Contagion mingling with the
Blood, whose Center or Fountain is in the Liver; from whence, by the swift
Circulation of the whole Mass, that dreadful nauceous Plague strikes immediately
thro' his Liver, and his Spirits are infected, his Vitals stab'd thro' as with a
Dart.
    It is true this poor unguarded Wretch was in no Danger from me, tho' I was
greatly apprehensive at first, what Danger I might be in from him; but he was
really to be pityed in one respect that he seem'd to be a good sort of a Man in
himself; a Gentleman that had no harm in his Design; a Man of Sense, and of a
fine Behaviour; a comely handsome Person, a sober and solid Countenance, a
charming beautiful Face, and every thing that cou'd be agreeable; only had
unhappily had some Drink the Night before; had not been in Bed, as he told me
when we were together; was hot, and his Blood fir'd with Wine, and in that
Condition his Reason as it were asleep, had given him up.
    As for me, my Business was his Money, and what I could make of him, and
after that if I could have found out any way to have done it, I would have sent
him safe home to his House, and to his Family, for 'twas ten to one but he had
an honest virtuous Wife, and innocent Children, that were anxious for his
Safety, and would have been glad to have gotten him Home, and taken care of him,
till he was restor'd to himself; and then with what Shame and Regret would he
look back upon himself? how would he reproach himself with associating himself
with a Whore? pick'd up in the worst of all Holes, the Cloister, among the Dirt
and Filth of the Town? how would he be trembling for fear he had got the Pox,
for fear a Dart had struck through his Liver, and hate himself every time he
look'd back upon the Madness and Brutality of his Debauch? how would he, if he
had any Principles of Honour, abhor the Thought of giving any ill Distemper, if
he had it, as for ought he knew he might, to his Modest and Virtuous Wife, and
thereby sowing the Contagion in the Life-Blood of his Posterity?
    Would such Gentlemen but consider the contemptible Thoughtswhich the very
Women they are concern'd with, in such Cases as these, have of them, it wou'd be
a surfeit to them: As I said above, they value not the Pleasure, they are raise'd
by no Inclination to the Man, the passive Jade thinks of no Pleasure but the
Money; and when he is as it were drunk in the Extasies of his wicked Pleasure,
her Hands are in his Pockets for what she can find there; and of which he can no
more be sensible in the Moment of his Folly, than he can fore-think of it when
he goes about it.
    I knew a Woman that was so dexterous with a Fellow, who indeed deserve'd no
better usage, that while he was busie with her another way, convey'd his Purse
with twenty Guineas in it out of his Fob pocket, where he had put it for fear of
her, and put another Purse with guilded Counters in it into the room of it:
After he had done, he says to her, now han't you pick'd my Pocket? she jested
with him, and told him she suppose'd he had not much to loose; he put his Hand to
his Fob, and with his Fingers felt that his Purse wasthere, whichfully
satisfy'dhim, and so she brought off his Money; and this was a Trade with her,
she kept a sham Gold Watch, and a Purse of Counters in her Pocket to be ready on
all such Occasions; and I doubt not practis'd it with Success.
    I came Home with this last Booty to my Governess, and really when I told her
the Story, it so affected her, that she was hardly able to forbear Tears, to
think how such a Gentleman run a daily Risque of being undone, every Time a
Glass of Wine got into his Head.
    But as to the Purchase I got, and how entirely I strip'd him, she told me it
pleased her wonderfully; nay, Child, says she, the Usage may, for ought I know,
do more to reform him, than all the Sermons that ever he will hear in his Life,
and if the Remainder of the Story be true, so it did.
    I found the next Day she was wonderful Inquisitive about this Gentleman; the
Description I gave her of him, his Dress, his Person, his Face, all concurr'd to
make her think of a Gentleman whose Character she knew; she mus'd awhile, and I
going on in the Particulars, says she, I lay a Hundred Pound I know the Man.
    I am sorry if you do, says I, for I would not have him expos'd on any
Account in the World; he has had Injury enough already, and I would not be
instrumental to do him any more: No, no, says she, I will do him no Injury, but
you may let me satisfy my Curiosity a little, for if it is he, I warrant you I
find it out: I was a little startled at that, and I told her with an apparent
Concern in my Face, that by the same Rule he might find me out, and then I was
undone: She return'd warmly, Why, do you think I will betray you, Child? No, no,
says she, not for all he is worth in the World; I have kept your Counsel in
worse Things than these, sure you may trust me in this: So I said no more.
    She laid her Scheme another way, and without acquainting me with it, but she
was resolve'd to find it out; so she goes to a certain Friend of hers who was
acquainted in the Family that she guess'd at, and told her she had some
extraordinary Business with such a Gentleman, (who by the way was no less than a
Baronet, and of a very good Family) and that she knew not how to come at him
without somebody to introduce her: Her Friend promise'd her readily to do it, and
accordingly goes to the House to see if the Gentleman was in Town.
    The next Day, she comes to my Governess and tells her, that Sir - was at
Home, but that he had met with a Disaster and was veryill, and there was no
speaking to him; what Disaster, says my Governess hastily, as if she was
Surprise'd at it? Why, says her Friend, he had been at Hampstead to Visit a
Gentleman of his Acquaintance, and as he came back again he was set upon and
Robb'd! and having got a little Drink too, as they suppose, the Rogues abus'd
him, and he is very ill: Robb'd! says my Governess, and what did they take from
him; why, says her Friend, they took his Gold Watch, and his Gold Snuff-box, his
fine Perriwig, and what Money he had in his Pocket, which was considerable to be
sure, for Sir - never goes without a Purse of Guineas about him.
    Pshaw! says myold Governess Jeering, I warrant you, he has got Drunk now and
got a Whore, and she has pick'd his Pocket, and so he comes Home to his Wife and
tells her he has been robb'd; that's an old Sham, a thousand such Tricks are put
upon the poor Women every Day.
    FYE, says her Friend, I find you don't know Sir -, why, he is as Civil a
Gentleman, there is not a finer man, nor a soberer, modester Person in the whole
City; he abhors such things, there's no Body that knows him will think such a
thing of him: Well, well, says my Governess, that's none of my Business, if it
was, I warrant I should find there was something of that in it; your modest Men
in common Opinion are sometimes no better than other People, only they keep a
better Character, or if you please, are the better Hypocrites.
    No, no, says her Friend, I can assure you Sir - is no Hypocrite, he is
really an honest, sober Gentleman, and he has certainly been Robb'd: Nay, says
my Governess, it may be he has, it is no Business of mine I tell you; Ionly want
to speak with him, my Business is of another Nature; but, says her Friend, let
your Business be of what nature it will, you cannot see him yet, for he is not
fit to be seen, for he is very ill, and bruis'd very much: Ay, says my Governess
, nay then he has fallen into bad Hands to be sure; and then she ask'd gravely,
pray where is he bruised? Why in his Head, says her Friend, and one of his
Hands, and his Face, for they us'd him barbarously. Poor Gentleman, says my
Governess, I must wait then till he recovers, and adds, I hope it will not be
long.
    Away she comes to me and tells me this story, I have found out your fine
Gentleman, and a fine Gentleman he was, says she, but, Mercy on him, he is in a
sad Pickle now, I wonder what the D - l you have done to him; why you have
almost kill'd him: I look'd at her with disorder enough; I kill'd him! says I,
you must mistake the Person, I am sure I did nothing to him, he was very well
when I left him, said I, only drunk and fast asleep; I know nothing of that,
says she, but he is in a sad pickle now, and so she told me all that her Friend
had said: Well then, says I, he fell into bad Hands after I left him, for I left
him safe enough.
    About ten Days after, my Governess goes again to her Friend, to introduce
her to this Gentleman; she had enquire'd otherways in the mean time, and found
that he was about again, so she got leave to speak with him.
    She was a Woman of an admirable Address, and wanted no Body to introduce
her; she told her Tale much better than I shall be able to tell it for her, for
she was Mistress of her Tongue, as I said already: She told him that she came,
tho' a Stranger, with a single design of doing him a Service, and he should find
she had no other End in it; that as she came purely on so Friendly an Account,
she beg'd a promise from him, that if he did not accept what she should
officiously propose, he would not take it ill that she meddl'd with what was not
her Business; she assure'd him that as what she had to say was a Secret that
belong'd to him only, so whether he accepted her offer or not, it should remain
a Secret to all the World, unless he expos'd it himself; nor should his refusing
her Service in it, make her so little show her Respect, as to do him the least
Injury, so that he should be entirely at liberty to act as he thought fit.
    He look'd very shy at first, and said he knew nothing that related to him
that require'd much secresie; that he had never done any Man any wrong, and car'd
not what any Body might say of him; that it was no part of his Character to be
unjust to any Body, nor could he imagine in what any Man cou'd render him any
Service; but that if it was as she said, he could not take it ill from any one
that should endeavour to serve him; and so, as it were, left her at liberty
either to tell him, or not to tell him, as she thought fit.
    She found him so perfectly indifferent, that she was almost afraid to enter
into the point with him; but however, after some other Circumlocutions, she told
him, that by a strange and unaccountable Accident she came to have a particular
knowledge of the late unhappy Adventure he had fallen into; and that in such a
manner, that there was no Body in the World but herself and him, that were
acquainted with it, no not the very Person that was with him.
    He look'd a little angrily at first, what Adventure? said he; why Sir, said
she, of your being Robb'd coming from Knightsbr-, Hampstead, Sir I should say,
says she: be not surpris'd, Sir, says she, that I am able to tell you every step
you took that Day from the Cloyster in Smithfield, to the Spring-garden at
Knightsbridge, and thence to the - in the Strand, and how you were left asleep
in the Coach afterwards; I say let not this surprise you, for Sir I do not come
to make a Booty of you, I ask nothing of you, and I assure you the Woman that
was with you knows nothing who you are, and never shall; and yet perhaps I may
serve you farther still, for I did not come barely to let you know, that I was
inform'd of these things, as if I wanted a Bribe to conceal them; assure your
self, Sir, said she, that whatever you think fit to do or say to me, it shall be
all a secret as it is, as much as if I were in my Grave.
    He was astonish'd at her Discourse, and said gravely to her, Madam, you are
a Stranger to me, but it is very unfortunate, that you should be let into the
Secret of the worst action of my Life, and a thing that I am justly a sham'd of,
in which the only satisfaction I had was, that I thought it was known only to
God and my own Conscience: Pray, Sir, says she, do not reckon the Discovery of
it to me, to be any part of your Misfortune; it was a thing, I believe, you were
surprised into, and perhaps the Woman us'd some Art to prompt you to it;
however, you will never find any just Cause, said she, to repent that I came to
hear of it; nor can your Mouth be more silent in it than I have been, and ever
shall be.
    Well, says he, but let me do some Justice to the Woman too, whoever she is,
I do assure you she prompted me to nothing, she rather decline'd me; it was my
own Folly and Madness that brought me into it all, ay and brought her into it
too; I must give her her due so far: As to what she took from me, I cou'd expect
no less from her in the condition I was in, and to this Hour I know not whether
she Robbed me or the Coachman; if she did it I forgive her, I think all
Gentlemen that do so, should be us'd in the same manner; but I am more concern'd
for some other things, than I am for all that she took from me.
    My Governess now began to come into the whole matter, and he open'd himself
freely to her; first, she said to him, in answer to what he had said about me, I
am glad Sir you are so just to the Person that you were with; I assure you she
is a Gentlewoman, and no Woman of the Town; and however you prevail'd with her
as you did, I am sure 'tis not her Practice; you run a great venture indeed,
Sir, but if that be part of your Care, you may be perfectly easy, for I do
assure you no Man has touch'd her, before you, since her Husband; and he has
been dead now almost eight Year.
    It appear'd that this was his Grievance, and that he was in a very great
fright about it; however, when my Governess said this to him, he appeared very
well pleas'd; and said, well, Madam, to be plain with you, if I was satisfy'd of
that, I should not so much value what I lost; for as to that, the Temptation was
great, and perhaps she was poor and wanted it: If she had not been poor Sir says
she, I assure you she would never have yielded to you; and as her Poverty first
prevail'd with her to let you do as you did, so the same Poverty prevail'd with
her to pay her self at last, when she saw you was in such a Condition, that if
she had not done it, perhaps the next Coachman or Chairman might have done it
more to your Hurt.
    Well, says he, much good may it do her; I say again, all the Gentlemen that
do so, ought to be us'd in the same manner, and then they would be cautious of
themselves; I have no more concern about it, but on the score which you hinted
at before: Here he entred into some freedoms with her on the Subject of what
pass'd between us, which are not so proper for a Woman to write, and the great
Terror that was upon his Mind with relation to his Wife, for fear she should
have receive'd any Injury from me, and should communicate it farther; and ask'd
her at last if she cou'd not procure him an opportunity to speak with me; my
Governess gave him farther assurances of my being a Woman clear from any such
thing, and that he was as entirely safe in that respect, as he was with his own
Lady; but as for seeing me, she said it might be of dangerous Consequence; but
however, that she would talk with me, and let him know; endeavouring at the same
time to perswade him not to desire it, and that it cou'd be of no Service to
him; seeing she hop'd he had no desire to renew the Correspondence, and that on
my account it was a kind of putting my Life in his Hands.
    He told her, he had a great desire to see me, that he would give her any
assurances that were in his Power, not to take any Advantages of me, and that in
the first place he would give me a general release from all Demands of any kind;
she insisted how it might tend to farther divulging the Secret, and might be
injurious to him, entreating him not to press for it, so at length he desisted.
    They had some Discourse upon the Subject of the things he had lost, and he
seem'd to be very desirous of his Gold Watch, and told her if she cou'd procure
that for him, he would willingly give as much for it, as it was worth; she told
him she would endeavour to procure it for him and leave the valuing it to
himself.
    Accordingly the next Day she carried the Watch, and he gave her 30 Guineas
for it, which was more than I should have been able to make of it, tho' it seems
it cost much more; he spoke something of his Perriwig, which it seems cost him
three-score Guineas, and his Snuff-box, and in a few Days more, she carried them
too; which oblige'd him very much, and he gave her Thirty more, the next Day I
sent him his fine Sword, and Cane gratis, and demanded nothing of him, but had
no mind to see him, unless he might be satisfy'd I knew who he was, which he was
not willing to.
    Then he entered into a long Talk with her of the manner how she came to know
all this matter; she form'd a long Tale of that part; how she had it from one,
that I had told the whole Story to, and that was to help me dispose of the
Goods; and this Confident brought Things to her, she being by Profession a
Pawn-Broker; and she hearing of his Worship's disaster, guess'd at the thing in
general; that having gotten the Things into her Hands, she had resolve'd to come
and try as she had done: She then gave him repeated Assurances that it should
never go out of her Mouth, and tho' she knew the Woman very well, yet she had
not let her know, meaning me, any thing of who the Person was, which by the way
was false; but however it was not to his Damage, for I never open'd my Mouth of
it to any Body.
    I had a great many Thoughts in my Head about my seeing him again, and was
often sorry that I had refuse'd it; I was persuaded that if I had seen him, and
let him know that I knew him, I should have made some Advantage of him, and
perhaps have had some Maintenance from him; and tho' it was a Life wicked
enough, yet it was not so full of Danger as this I was ingag'd in: However those
Thoughts wore off, and I decline'd seeing him again, for that Time; but my
Governess saw him often, and he was very kind to her, giving her something
almost every time he saw her; one time in particular she found him very Merry,
and as she thought he had some Wine in his Head then, and he press'd her again
to let him see that Woman, that, as he said, had bewitch'd him so that Night; my
Governess, who was from the Beginning for my seeing him, told him, he was so
desirous of it, that she could almost yield to it, if she could prevail uponme;
adding that if he would please to come to her House in the Evening, she would
endeavour it, upon his repeated Assurances of forgetting what was past.
    Accordingly she came to me and told me all the Discourse; in short, she soon
byass'd me to consent, in a Case which I had some regret in my Mind for
declining before; so I prepare'd to see him; I dress'd me to all the Advantage
possible I assure you, and for the first time us'd a little Art, I say for the
first Time, for I had never yielded to the baseness of Paint before, having
always had Vanity enough to believe I had no need of it.
    At the Hour appointed he came; and as she observe'd before, so it was plain
still, that he had been drinking, tho' very far from what we call being in
Drink: He appear'd exceeding pleas'd to see me, and enter'd into a long
Discourse with me, upon the old Affair; I beg'd his Pardon very often, for my
Share of it, protested I had not any such Design when first I met him, that I
had not gone out with him, but that I took him for a very civil Gentleman, and
that he made me so many Promises of offering no Uncivility to me.
    He alledg'd the Wine he drank, and that he scarce knew what he did, and that
if it had not been so, he should never have taken the freedom with me he had
done: He protested to me that he never touch'd any Woman but me, since he was
marry'd to his Wife, and it was a Surprise upon him; Complimented me upon being
so particularly agreeable to him, and the like, and talk'd so much of that kind,
'till I found he had talk'd himself almost into a Temper to do the thing again:
But I took him up short, I protested I had never suffer'd any Man to touch me
since my Husband died, which was near eight Year; he said he believe'd it; and
added, that Madam, had intimated as much to him, and that it was his Opinion of
that part which made him desire to see me again; and since he had once broken in
upon his Virtue with me, and found no ill Consequences, he could be safe in
venturing again; and so in short he went on, to what I expected, and to what
will not bear relating.
    My old Governess had foreseen it, as well as I, and therefore led him into a
Room which had not a Bed in it, and yet had a Chamber within it, which had a
Bed, whither we withdrew for the rest of the Night, and in short, after some
time being together; he went to Bed, and lay there all Night, I withdrew, but
came again undress'd before it was Day, and lay with him the rest of the Time.
    Thus you see having committed a Crime once, is a sad Handle to the
committing of it again; all the Reflections wear off when the Temptation renews
itself; had I not yielded to see him again, the corrupt Desire in him had worn
off, and 'tis very probable he had never fallen into it, with any Body else, as
I really believe he had not done before.
    When he went away, I told him I hop'd he was satisfy'd he had not been
robb'd again; he told me he was fully satisfy'd in that Point; and putting his
Hand in his Pocket gave me five Guineas, which was the first Money I had gain'd
that way for many Years.
    I had several Visits of the like Kind from him, but he never came into a
settled way of Maintenance, which was what I would have been best pleas'd with:
Once, indeed, he ask'd me how I didtolive, I answer'd him pretty quick, that I
assure'd him I had never taken that Course that I took with him; but that indeed
I work'd at my Needle, and could just Maintain my self, that sometimes it was as
much as I was able to do, and I shifted hard enough.
    He seem'd to reflect upon himself, that he should be the first Person to
lead me into that, which he assure'd me he never intended to do himself; and it
touch'd him a little, he said, that he should be the Cause of his own Sin, and
mine too: He would often make just Reflections, also upon the Crime itself, and
upon the particular Circumstances of it, with respect to himself; how Wine
introduc'd the Inclinations, how the Devil led him to the Place, and found out
an Object to tempt him, and he made the Moral always himself.
    When these Thoughts were upon him, he would go away, and perhaps not come
again in a Months time or longer; but then as the serious Part wore off, the
lewd Part would wear in, and then he came prepare'd for the wicked Part; thus we
liv'd for some Time; tho' he did not KEEP, as they call it, yet he never fail'd
doing things that were handsome, and sufficient to maintain me without Working,
and which was better, without following my old Trade.
    But this Affair had its End too; for after about a Year, I found that he did
not come so often as usual, and at last he left it off altogether without any
Dislike, or bidding adieu; and so there was an End of that short Scene of Life,
which added no great Store to me, only to make more Work for Repentance.
    During this Interval, I confine'd my self pretty much at Home; at least being
thus provided for, I made no Adventures, no not for a Quarter of a Year after;
but then finding the Fund fail, and being loath to spend upon the main Stock, I
began to think of my old Trade, and to look abroad into the Street; and my first
Step was lucky enough.
    I had dress'd myself up in a very mean Habit, for as I had several Shapes to
appear in, I was now in an ordinary Stuff Gown, a blue Apron and a Straw Hat;
and I plac'd myself at the Door of the three Cups Inn in St. John's-street:
There were several Carriers us'd the Inn, and the Stage Coaches for Barnet, for
Toteridge, and other Towns that Way, stood always in the Street, in the Evening,
when they prepare'd to set out; so that I was ready for any thing that offer'd:
The Meaning was this, People come frequently with Bundles and small Parcels to
those Inns, and call for such Carriers, or Coaches as they want; to carry them
into the Country; and there generally attends Women, Porter's Wives or
Daughters, ready to take in such things for the People that employ them.
    It happen'd very odly that I was standing at the Inn-Gate, and a Woman that
stood there before, and which was the Porter's Wife belonging to the Barnet
Stage Coach, having observe'd me, ask'd if I waited for any of the Coaches; I
told her yes, I waited for my Mistress, that was coming to go to Barnet; she
ask'd me who was my Mistress, and I told her any Madam's Name that came next me;
but it seem'd I happen'd upon a Name, a Family of which Name liv'd at Hadly near
Barnet.
    I said no more to her, or she to me a good while, but by and by, some Body
calling her at a Door a little way off, she desire'd me that if any Body call'd
for the Barnet Coach, I would step and call her at the House, which it seems was
an Ale-house; I said yes, very readily, and away she went.
    She was no sooner gone; but comes a Wench and a Child, puffing and sweating,
and asks for the Barnet Coach, I answer'd presently, here. Do you belong to the
Barnet Coach? says she. Yes, Sweetheart, said I, What do you want? I want Room
for two Passengers, says she. Where are they Sweetheart? said I. Here's this
Girl, pray let her go into the Coach, says she, and I'll go and fetch my
Mistress; make haste then Sweet-heart, says I, for we may be full else. The Maid
had a great Bundle under her Arm; so she put the Child into the Coach; and I
said, you had best put your Bundle into the Coach too; No, said she, I am afraid
some Body should slip it away from the Child; give it me then, said I; take it
then, says she, and be sure you take care of it; I'll answer for it, said I, if
it were Twenty Pound vallue. There take it then, says she, and away she goes.
    As soon as I got the Bundle, and the Maid was out of Sight, I goes on
towards the Ale-house, where the Porter's Wife was, so that if I met her, I had
then only been going to give her the Bundle and to call her to her Business, as
if I was going away, and could stay no longer; but as I did not meet her I
walk'd away, and turning into Charter-house-Lane, made off thro'
Charter-house-Yard, into Long-Lane, then into Bartholomew-Close, so into Little
Britain, and thro' the Blue-Coat-Hospital, to Newgate-Street.
    To prevent being known, I pull'd off my blue Apron, and wrapt the Bundle in
it, which was made up in a Piece of painted Callico; I also wrapt up my Straw
Hat in it, and so put the Bundle upon my Head; and it was very well, that I did
thus, for coming thro' the Blue-Coat-Hospital, who should I meet but the Wench,
that had given me the Bundle to hold; it seems she was going with her Mistress,
who she had been to fetch to the the Barnet Coaches.
    I saw she was in hast, and I had no Business to stop her; so away she went,
and I brought my Bundle safe to my Governess; there was no Money, Plate, or
Jewels in it; but a very good Suit of Indian Damask, a Gown and Petticoat, a
lac'd Head and Ruffles of very good Flanders Lace, and some other Things, such
as I knew very well the Value of.
    This was not indeed, my own Invention, but was given me by one that had
practis'd it with Success, and my Governess lik'd it extremely; and indeed, I
try'd it again several times, tho' never twice near the same Place; for the next
time I try'd in White Chappel, just by the corner of Petti-Coat-Lane, where the
Coaches stand that go out to Stratford and Bow, and that Side of the Country;
and another time at the Flying-Horse without Bishopsgate, where the Cheston
Coaches then lay, and I had always the good Luck to come off with some Booty.
    Another time I placed myself at a Warehouse by the Water-side, where the
Coasting Vessels from the North come, such as New-Castle upon Tyne, Sunderland,
and other Places; here the Warehouse, being shut, comes a young Fellow with a
Letter; and he wanted a Box, and a Hamper that was come from New-Castle upon
Tyne, I ask'd him if he had the Marks of it, so he shows me the Letter, by
Vertue of which he was to ask for it, and which gave an Account of the Contents,
the Box being full of Linnen, and the Hamper full of Glass-Ware; I read the
Letter, and took Care to see the Name, and the Marks, the Name of the Person
that sent the Goods, and the Name of the Person they were sent to; then I bad
the Messenger come in the Morning, for that the Warehouse-Keeper would not be
there any more that Night.
    Away went I, and wrote a Letter from Mr. John Richardson of New-Castle to
his dear Cousin Jemy Cole, in London, with an Account that he had sent by such a
Vessel (for I remembered all the Particulars to a Tittle), so many Pieces of
Huckaback Linnen, and so many Ells of Dutch Holland, and the Like, in a Box, and
a Hamper of Flint-Glasses from Mr. Henzill's Glass-house; and that the Box was
marked I.C. No. 1., and the Hamper was directed by a Label on the Cording.
    About an hour after, I came to the Warehouse, found the Warehouse-Keeper,
and had the Goods deliver'd me without any Scruple; the Value of the Linnen
being about 22 Pound.
    I could fill up this whole Discourse with the Variety of such Adventures,
which daily Invention directed to, and which I manage'd with the utmost
Dexterity, and always with Success.
    At length, as when does the Pitcher come safe Home that goes so often to the
Well, I fell into some Broils, which tho' they could not affect me fatally, yet
made me known, which was the worst thing next to being found Guilty, that could
befal me.
    I had taken up the Disguise of a Widow's Dress; it was without any real
Design in View, but only waiting for any thing that might offer, as I often did:
It happen'd that while I was going along a Street in Covent-Garden, there was a
great Cry of stop Thief, stop Thief; some Artists had it seems put a Trick upon
a Shop-keeper, and being pursued, some of them fled one way, and some another;
and one of them was, they said, dress'd up in Widow's Weeds, upon which the Mob
gather'd about me, and some said I was the Person, others said no, immediately
came the Mercer's Journey-man, and he swore aloud I was the Person, and so
seize'd on me; however, when I was brought back by the Mob to the Mercer's Shop,
the Master of the House said freely that I was not the Woman; and would have let
me go immediately; but another fellow said gravely, pray stay till Mr. -,
meaning the Journeyman, comes back, for he knows her; so they kept me near half
an Hour; they had call'd a Constable, and he stood in the Shop as my Jayler; in
talking with the Constable I enquire'd where he liv'd, and what Trade he was; the
Man not apprehending in the least what happen'd afterwards, readily told me his
Name, and where he liv'd; and told me as a Jest, that I might be sure to hear of
his Name when I came to the Old-Bayly.
    The Servants likewise us'd me saucily, and had much ado to keep their Hands
off me, the Master indeed was civiler to me than they; but he would not let me
go, tho' he own'd I was not in his Shop before.
    I began to be a little surly with him, and told him I hop'd he would not
take it ill, if I made my self amends upon him another time; and desire'd I might
send for Friends to see me have right done: No, he said, he could give no such
liberty, I might ask it when I came before the Justice of Peace, and seeing I
threaten'd him, he would take care of me in the mean time, and would lodge me
safe in Newgate: I told him it was his time now, but it would be mine by and by,
and govern'd my Passion as well as I was able, however, I spoke to the Constable
to call me a Porter, which he did, and then I call'd for Pen, Ink, and Paper,
but they would let me have none; I ask'd the Porter his Name, and where he
liv'd, and the poor Man told it me very willingly; I bad him observe and
remember how I was treated there; that he saw I was detain'd there by Force; I
told him I should want him in another Place, and it should not be the worse for
him to speak; the Porter said he would serve me with all his Heart; but, Madam,
says he, let me hear them refuse to let you go, then I may be able to speak the
plainer.
    With that, I spoke aloud to the Master of the Shop, and said, Sir, you know
in your own Conscience that I am not the Person you look for, and that I was not
in your Shop before, therefore I demand that you detain me here no longer, or
tell me the reason of your stopping me; the Fellow grew surlier upon this than
before, and said he would do neither till he thought fit; very well, said I to
the Constable and to the Porter, you will be pleas'd to remember this,
Gentlemen, another time; the Porter said, yes, Madam, and the Constable began
not to like it, and would have persuaded the Mercer to dismiss him, and let me
go, since, as he said, he own'd I was not the Person; Good Sir, says the Mercer
to him Tauntingly, are you a Justice of Peace, or a Constable? I charge'd you
with her, pray do your Duty: The Constable told him a little mov'd, but very
handsomely, I know my duty, and what I am, Sir; I doubt you know hardly what you
are doing; they had some other hard words, and in the mean time the Journey-men,
impudent and unmanly to the last degree, used me barbarously, and one of them,
the same that first seize'd upon me, pretended he would search me, and began to
lay Hands on me: I spit in his Face, call'd out to the Constable, and bad him
take notice of my usage; and pray, Mr. Constable, said I, ask that Villain's
Name, pointing to the Man; the Constable reprov'd him decently, told him that he
did not know what he did, for he knew that his Master acknowledge'd I was not the
Person; and says the Constable, I am afraid your Master is bringing himself and
me too into Trouble, if this Gentlewoman comes to prove who she is, and where
she was, and it appears that she is not the Woman you pretend to; Dam her, says
the Fellow again, with an impudent harden'd Face, she is the Lady you may depend
upon it, I'll swear she is the same Body that was in the Shop, and that I gave
the pieces of Satin that is lost into her own Hand, you shall hear more of it
when Mr. William and Mr. Anthony, those were other Journeymen, come back, they
will know her again as well as I.
    Just as the insolent Rogue was talking thus to the Constable, comes back Mr.
William and Mr. Anthony, as he call'd them, and a great Rabble with them,
bringing along with them the true Widow that I was pretended to be; and they
came sweating and blowing into the Shop, and with a great deal of Triumph
dragging the poor Creature in a most butcherly manner up towards their Master,
who was in the back Shop, and they cry'd out aloud, here's the Widow, Sir, we
have caught her at last; what do you mean by that, says the Master, why we have
her already, there she sits, and Mr.-- says he can swear this is she: The other
Man who they call'd Mr. Anthony reply'd; Mr.-- may say what he will, and swear
what he will, but this is the Woman, and there's the Remnant of Sattin she
stole, I took it out of her clothes with my own Hand.
    I now began to take a better Heart, but smile'd and said nothing; the Master
look'd Pale; the Constable turn'd about and look'd at me; let 'em alone, Mr.
Constable, said I, let' em go on; the Case was plain and could not be denied, so
the Constable was charge'd with the right Thief, and the Mercer told me very
civily he was sorry for the Mistake, and hop'd I would not take it ill; that
they had so many Things of this nature put upon them every Day, that they could
not be blam'd for being very sharp in doing themselves Justice: Not take it ill,
Sir, said I; how can I take it well? if you had dismiss'd me when your insolent
Fellow seize'd on me in the Street, and brought me to you; and when you yourself
acknowledge'd I was not the Person, I wou'd have put it by, and not have taken it
ill, because of the many ill things I believe you have put upon you daily; but
your Treatment of me since has been unsufferable, and especially that of your
Servant, I must and will have Reparation for that.
    Then he began to parly with me, said he would make me any reasonable
Satisfaction, and would fain have had me told him what it was I expected; I told
him I should not be my own Judge, the Law should decide it for me, and as I was
to be carried before a Magistrate, I should let him hear there what I had to
say; he told me there was no occasion to go before the Justice now, I was at
liberty to go where I pleased, and calling to the Constable told him, he might
let me go, or I was discharg'd; the Constable said calmly to him, Sir, you ask'd
me just now, if I knew whether I was a Constable or a Justice, and bad me do my
Duty, and charge'd me with this Gentlewoman as a Prisoner; now Sir, I find you do
not understand what is my Duty, for you would make me a Justice indeed; but I
must tell you it is not in my Power: I may keep a Prisoner when I am charge'd
with him, but 'tis the Law and the Magistrate alone that can discharge that
Prisoner; therefore 'tis a Mistake Sir, I must carry her before a Justice now,
whether you think well of it or not: The Mercer was very high with the Constable
at first; but the Constable happening to be not a hir'd Officer, but a good,
Substantial kind of Man, I think he was a Corn-chandler, and a Man of good Sense
stood to his Business, would not discharge me without going to a Justice of the
Peace, and I insisted upon it too: When the Mercer see that; well, says he to
the Constable, you may carry her where you please, I have nothing to say to her;
but Sir, says the Constable, you will go with us, I hope, for 'tis you that
charge'd me with her; no not I, says the Mercer, I tell you, I have nothing to
say to her: But pray Sir do, says the Constable, I desire it of you for your own
sake, for the Justice can do nothing without you: Prithee Fellow, says the
Mercer, go about your Business, I tell you I have nothing to say to the
Gentlewoman, I charge you in the King's Name to dismiss her: Sir, says the
Constable, I find you don't know what it is to be a Constable, I beg of you
don't oblige me to be rude to you: I think I need not, you are rude enough
already, says the Mercer: No, Sir, says the Constable, I am not rude, you have
broken the Peace in bringing an honest Woman out of the Street, when she was
about her lawful Occasions, confining her in your Shop, and ill using her here
by your Servants; and now can you say I am rude to you? I think I am civil to
you in not commanding you in the King's Name to go with me, and charging every
Man I see, that passes your Door, to aid and assist me in carrying you by Force;
this you know I have power to do, and yet I forbear it, and once more entreat
you to go with me: Well, he would not for all this, and gave the Constable ill
Language: However, the Constable kept his Temper, and would not be provok'd; and
then I put in and said, come, Mr. Constable let him alone, I shall find ways
enough to fetch him before a Magistrate, I don't fear that; but there's that
Fellow, says I, he was the Man that seized on me, as I was innocently going
along the Street, and you are a Witness of his Violence with me since, give me
leave to charge you with him, and carry him before a Justice; yes, Madam, says
the Constable; and turning to the Fellow, come young Gentleman, says be to the
Journeyman, you must go along with us, I hope you are not above the Constable's
Power, tho' your Master is.
    The Fellow look'd like a condemn'd Thief, and hung back, then look'd at his
Master, as if he cou'd help him; and he, like a Fool, encourage'd the Fellow to
be rude, and he truly resisted the Constable, and push'd him back with a good
Force when he went to lay hold on him, at which the Constable knock'd him down,
and call'd out for help, immediately the Shop was fill'd with People, and the
Constable seize'd the Master and Man, and all his Servants.
    The first ill Consequence of this Fray was, that the Woman, who was really
the Thief, made off, and got clear away in the Crowd; and two others that they
had stop'd also, whether they were really Guilty or not, that I can say nothing
to.
    By this time some of his Neighbours having come in, and seeing how things
went, had endeavour'd to bring the Mercer to his Senses; and he began to be
convince'd that he was in the wrong; and so at length we went all very quietly
before the Justice, with a Mob of about 500 People at our Heels; and all the way
we went I could hear the People ask what was the matter? and others reply and
say, a Mercer had stop'd a Gentlewoman instead of a Thief, and had afterwards
taken the Thief, and now the Gentlewoman had taken the Mercer, and was carrying
him before the Justice; this pleas'd the People strangely, and made the Crowd
increase, and they cry'd out as they went, which is the Rogue? which is the
Mercer? and especially the Women, then when they saw him they cryed out, that's
he, that's he; and every now and then came a good dab of Dirt at him; and thus
we march'd a good while, till the Mercer thought fit to desire the Constable to
call a Coach to protect himself from the Rabble; so we Rode the rest of the way,
the Constable and I, and the Mercer and his Man.
    When we came to the Justice, which was an ancient Gentleman in Bloomsbury,
the Constable giving first a summary account of the Matter, the Justice bad me
speak, and tell what I had to say; and first he asked my Name, which I was very
loath to give, but there was no remedy, so I told him my Name was Mary Flanders,
that I was a Widow, my Husband being a Sea Captain, dyed on a Voyage to Virginia
; and some other Circumstances I told, which he cou'd never contradict, and that
I lodge'd at present in Town, with such a Person, naming my Governess; but that I
was preparing to go over to America, where my Husband's Effects lay, and that I
was going that Day to buy some clothes to put my self into second Mourning, but
had not yet been in any Shop, when that Fellow, pointing to the Mercer's
Journeyman came rushing upon me with such fury, as very much frighted me, and
carried me back to his Master's Shop; where tho' his Master acknowledge'd I was
not the Person; yet he would not dismiss me, but charge'd a Constable with me.
    Then I proceeded to tell how the Journeymen treated me; how they would not
suffer me to send for any of my Friends; how afterwards they found the real
Thief, and took the Goods they had Lost upon her, and all the particulars as
before.
    Then the Constable related his Case; his Dialogue with the Mercer about
Discharging me, and at last his Servants refusing to go with him, when I had
Charg'd him with him, and his Master encouraging him to do so; and at last his
striking the Constable, and the like, all as I have told it already.
    The Justice then heard, the Mercer and his Man; the Mercer indeed made a
long Harangue of the great loss they have daily by the Lifters and Thieves; that
it was easy for them to Mistake, and that when he found it, he would have
dismiss'd me, &amp;c. as above, as to the Journeyman he had very little to say,
but that he pretended other of the Servants told him, that I was really the
Person.
    Upon the whole, the Justice first of all told me very courteously I was
discharg'd; that he was very sorry that the Mercer's Man should in his eager
pursuit have so little Discretion, as to take up an innocent Person for a
guilty; that if he had not been so unjust as to detain me afterwards; he
believe'd I would have forgiven the first Affront; that however it was not in his
Power to award me any Reparation, other, than by openly reproving them, which he
should do; but he suppose'd I would apply to such Methods as the Law directed; in
the mean time he would bind him over.
    But as to the Breach of the Peace committed by the Journeyman, he told me he
should give me some satisfaction for that, for he should commit him to Newgate
for Assaulting the Constable, and for Assaulting of me also.
    Accordingly he sent the Fellow to Newgate, for that Assault, and his Master
gave Bail, and so we came away; but I had the satisfaction of seeing the Mob
wait upon them both, as they came out, Holooing, and throwing Stones and Dirt at
the Coaches they rode in, and so I came Home.
    After this hustle, coming home, and telling my Governess the Story, she
falls a Laughing at me; Why are you so merry, says I? the Story has not so much
Laughing room in it, as you imagine; I am sure I have had a great deal of Hurry
and Fright too, with a Pack of ugly Rogues. Laugh, says my Governess, I laugh
Child to see what a lucky Creature you are; why this Jobb will be the best
Bargain to you, that ever you made in your Life, if you manage it well: I
warrant you, you shall make the Mercer pay 500l. for Damages, besides what you
shall get of the Journeyman.
    I had other Thoughts of the Matter than she had; and especially, because I
had given in my Name to the Justice of Peace; and I knew that my Name was so
well known among the People at Hicks's-Hall, the Old Baily, and such Places,
that if this Cause came to be try'd openly, and my Name came to be enquire'd
into, no Court would give much Damages, for the Reputation of a Person of such a
Character; however, I was oblige'd to begin a Prosecution in Form, and
accordingly my Governess found me out a very creditable sort of a Man to manage
it, being an Attorney of very good Business, and of good Reputation, and she was
certainly in the right of this; for had she employ'd a petty Fogging hedge
Solicitor, or a Man not known, I should have brought it to but little.
    I met this Attorney, and gave him all the particulars at large, as they are
recited above; and he assure'd me, it was a Case, as he said, that he did not
Question, but that a Jury would give very considerable Damages; so taking his
full Instructions, he began the Prosecution, and the Mercer being Arrested, gave
Bail; a few Days after his giving Bail, he comes with his Attorney to my
Attorney, to let him know, that he desire'd to Accomodate the matter, that it was
all carried on in the Heat of an unhappy Passion; that his Client, meaning me,
had a sharp provoking Tongue, and that I us'd them ill, gibbing at them, and
jeering them, even while they believed me to be the very Person, and that I had
provok'd them, and the like.
    My Attorney manage'd as well on my Side; made them believe I was a Widow of
Fortune, that I was able to do myself Justice, and had great Friends to stand by
me too, who had all made me promise to Sue to the utmost, if it cost me a
Thousand Pound, for that the Affronts I had receive'd were insufferable.
    However they brought my Attorney to this, that he promise'd he would not blow
the Coals, that if I enclin'd to an Accommodation, he would not hinder me, and
that he would rather perswade me to Peace than to War; for which they told him
he should be no looser, all which he told me very honestly, and told me that if
they offer'd him any Bribe, I should certainly know it; but upon the whole he
told me very honestly that if I would take his Opinion - he would Advise me to
make it up, with them; for that as they were in a great Fright, and were
desirous above all things to make it up, and knew that let it be what it would,
they must bear all the Costs; he believed they would give me freely more than
any Jury would give upon a Trial: I ask'd him what he thought they would be
brought to; he told me he could not tell, as to that; but he would tell me more
when I saw him again.
    Some time after this, they came again, to know if he had talk'd with me: He
told them he had, that he found me not so Averse to an Accommodation as some of
my Friends were, who resented the Disgrace offer'd me, and set me on; that they
blow'd the Coals in secret, prompting me to Revenge, or to do myself Justice, as
they call'd it; so that he could not tell what to say to it; he told them he
would do his endeavour to persuade me, but he ought to be able to tell me what
Proposal they made: They pretended they could not make any Proposal because it
might be made use of against them; and he told them, that by the same Rule he
could not make any offers, for that might be pleaded in Abatement of what
Damages a Jury might be inclin'd to give: However, after some Discourse and
mutual Promises that no Advantage should be taken on either Side, by what was
transacted then, or at any other of those Meetings, they came to a kind of a
Treaty; but so remote, and so wide from one another, that nothing could be
expected from it; for my Attorney demanded 500l. and Charges, and they offer'd
50l. without Charges; so they broke off, and the Mercer propos'd to have a
Meeting with me myself; and my Attorney agreed to that very readily.
    My Attorney gave me Notice to come to this Meeting in good clothes, and with
some State, that the Mercer might see I was something more than I seem'd to be
that time they had me: Accordingly I came in a new Suit of second Mourning,
according to what I had said at the Justices; I set myself out too, as well as a
Widows dress would admit; my Governess, also furnish'd me with a good Pearl
Necklace, that shut in behind with a Locket of Diamonds, which she had in Pawn;
and I had a very good Gold Watch by my Side: so that I made a very good Figure,
and as I stay'd till I was sure they were come; I came in a Coach to the Door,
with my Maid with me.
    When I came into the Room, the Mercer was Surprise'd, he stood up and made
his Bow, which I took a little Notice of, and but a little, and went and sat
down, where my own Attorney had appointed me to sit, for it was his House; after
a while, the Mercer said, he did not know me again, and began to make some
Compliments; I told him, I believe'd he did not know me at first, and that if he
had, he would have not treated me as he did.
    He told me he was very sorry for what had happen'd, and that it was to
testify the Willingness he had to make all possible Reparation, that he had
appointed this Meeting; that he hop'd I would not carry things to Extremity,
which might be not only too great a Loss to him, but might be the Ruin of his
Business and Shop, in which Case I might have the Satisfaction of repaying an
Injury with an Injury ten times greater; but that I would then get nothing,
whereas he was willing to do me any Justice that was in his Power, without
putting himself, or me to the Trouble or Charge of a Suit of Law.
    I told him I was glad to hear him talk so much more like a Man of Sense than
he did before; that it was true, Acknowledgment in most Cases of Affronts was
counted Reparation sufficient; but this had gone too far to be made up so; that
I was not revengeful, nor did I seek his Ruin, or any Man's else, but that all
my Friends were unanimous not to let me so far neglect my Character, as to
adjust a thing of this kind without Reparation: That to be taken up for a Thief,
was such an Indignity as could not be put up, that my Character was above being
treated so by any that knew me, but because in my Condition of a Widow, I had
been careless of myself, I might be taken for such a Creature, but that for the
particular Usage I had from him afterwards; and then I repeated all as before, it
was so provoking I had scarce Patience to repeat it.
    He acknowledge'd all, and was mighty humble indeed; he came up to Hundred
Pounds and to pay all the Law Charges, and added, that he would make me a
Present of a very good Suit of clothes; I came down to Three Hundred Pounds, and
demanded that I should publish an Advertisement of the Particulars in the common
New's-Papers.
    This was a Clause he never could comply with; however, at last he came up,
by good Management of my Attorney to 150l. and a Suit of black Silk clothes, and
there, as it were at my Attorney's Request, I comply'd; he paying my Attorney's
Bill and Charges, and gave us a good Supper into the Bargain.
    When I came to receive the Money, I brought my Governess with me, dress'd
like an old Dutchess, and a Gentleman very well dress'd, who we pretended
Courted me, but I call'd him Cousin, and the Lawyer was only to hint privately
to them, that this Gentleman Courted the Widow.
    He treated us handsomely indeed, and paid the Money cheerfully enough; so
that it cost him 200l. in all, or rather more: At our last Meeting, when all was
agreed, the Case of the Journeyman came up, and the Mercer beg'd very hard for
him, told me he was a Man that had kept a Shop of his own, and been in good
Business, had a Wife and several Children, and was very poor, that he had
nothing to make Satisfaction with, but should beg my Pardon on his Knees: I had
no Spleen at the saucy Rogue, nor were his Submissions any thing to me, since
there was nothing to be got by him; so I thought it was as good to throw that in
generously as not, so I told him I did not desire the Ruin of any Man, and
therefore at his Request I would forgive the Wretch, it was below me to seek any
Revenge.
    When we were at Supper he brought the Poor Fellow in to make his
Acknowledgment, which he would have done with as much mean Humility, as his
Offence was with insulting Pride, in which he was an Instance of a complete
Baseness of Spirit, imperious, cruel, and relentless when Uppermost; abject and
low Spirited when down: However, I abated his Cringes, told him, I forgave him,
and desire'd he might withdraw, as if I did not care for the Sight of him, tho' I
had forgiven him.
    I was now in good Circumstances indeed, if I could have known my Time for
leaving off, and my Governess often said I was the richest of the Trade in
England, and so I believe I was; for I had 700l. by me in Money, besides
clothes, Rings, some Plate, and two Gold Watches, and all of them stol'n, for I
had innumerable Jobbs, besides these I have mentioned; O! Had I even now had the
Grace of Repentance, I had still Leisure to have look'd back upon my Follies,
and have made some Reparation; but the Satisfaction I was to make for the
Publick Mischiefs I had done, was yet left behind; and I could not forbear going
abroad again, as I call'd it now, any more than I could when my Extremity really
drove me out for Bread.
    It was not long after the Affair with the Mercer was made up, that I went
out in an Equipage quite different from any I had ever appear'd in before; I
dress'd myself like a Begger Woman, in the coursest and most despicable Rags I
could get, and I walk'd about Peering, and Peeping into every Door and Window I
came near; and indeed I was in such a Plight now, that I knew as ill how to
behave in, as ever I did in any; I naturally abhor'd Dirt and Rags; I had been
bred up Tite and Cleanly, and could be no other, what-ever Condition I was in;
so that this was the most uneasy Disguise to me that ever I put on: I said
presently to my self, that this would not do, for this was a Dress that every
Body was shy, and afraid of; and I thought every Body look'd at me as if they
were afraid I should come near them, least I should take something from them, or
afraid to come near me, least they should get something from me: I wandred about
all the Evening the first Time I went out, and made nothing of it, and came Home
again wet, dragl'd, and tired: However I went out again the next Night, and then
I met with a little Adventure, which had like to have cost me dear; as I was
standing near a Tavern Door, there comes a Gentleman on Horseback, and lights at
the Door, and wanting to go into the Tavern, he calls one of the Drawers to hold
his Horse; he stay'd pretty long in the Tavern, and the Drawer heard his Master
call, and thought he would be angry with him; seeing me stand by him, he call'd
to me, here Woman, says he, hold this Horse a while, 'till I go in; if the
Gentleman comes, he'll give you something; yes says I, and takes the Horse, and
walks off with him soberly, and carry'd him to my Governess.
    This had been a Booty to those that had understood it; but never was poor
Thief more at a Loss to know what to do with any Thing that was stolen; for when
I came Home, my Governess was quite confounded, and what to do with the
Creature, we neither of us knew; to send him to a Stable was doing nothing, for
it was certain that Notice would be given in the Gazette, and the Horse
describe'd, so that we durst not go to fetch it again.
    All the Remedy we had for this unlucky Adventure was to go and set up the
Horse at an Inn, and send a Note by a Porter to the Tavern, that the Gentleman's
Horse that was lost at such a Time, was left at such an Inn, and that he might
be had there; that the poor Woman that held him, having led him about the
Street, not being able to lead him back again, had left him there; we might have
waited till the owner had publish'd, and offer'd a Reward, but we did not care
to venture the receiving the Reward.
    So this was a Robbery and no Robbery, for little was lost by it, and nothing
was got by it, and I was quite Sick of going out in a Beggar's Dress; it did not
answer at all, and besides I thought it Ominous and Threatning.
    While I was in this Disguise, I fell in with a parcel of Folks of a worse
Kind than any I ever sorted with, and I saw a little into their Ways too, these
were Coiners of Money, and they made some very good Offers to me, as to Profit;
but the Part they would have had me embark'd in, was the most dangerous; I mean
that of the very working of the Dye, as they call it, which had I been taken,
had been certain Death, and that at a Stake, I say, to be burnt to Death at a
Stake; so that tho' I was to Appearance, but a Beggar; and they promise'd
Mountains of Gold and Silver to me, to engage; yet it would not do; 'tis true,
if I had been realy a Beggar, or had been desperate as when I began, I might
perhaps have closed with it, for what care they to Dye, that cannot tell how to
Live? But at present that was not my Condition, at least I was for no such
terrible Risques as those; besides, the very Thoughts of being burnt at a Stake,
struck Terror to my very Soul, chill'd my Blood, and gave me the Vapours to such
a Degree, as I could not think of it without trembling.
    This put an End to my Disguise too, for tho' I did not like the Proposal,
yet I did not tell them so; but seem'd to relish it, and promise'd to meet again;
but I durst see them no more; for if I had seen them, and not comply'd, tho' I
had decline'd it with the greatest Assurances of Secresy in the World, they would
have gone near to have murder'd me, to make sure Work, and make themselves easy,
as they call it; what kind of Easiness that is, they may best judge that
understand how easy Men are, that can murder People to prevent Danger.
    This and Horse stealing were things quite out of my Way, and I might easily
resolve I would have no more to say to them; my Business seem'd to lye another
Way, and tho' it had hazard enough in it too, yet it was more suitable to me,
and what had more of Art in it, and more Chances for a coming off, if a Surprise
should happen.
    I had several Proposals made also to me about that Time, to come into a Gang
of House Breakers; but that was a thing I had no mind to venture at neither, any
more than I had at the Coining Trade; I offer'd to go along with two Men, and a
Woman, that made it their Business to get into Houses by Stratagem, I was
willing enough to venture; but there were three of them already, and they did
not care to part, nor I to have too many in a Gang, so I did not close with
them, and they paid dear for their next Attempt.
    But at length I met with a Woman that had often told me what Adventures she
had made, and with Success, at the Water-side, and I clos'd with her, and we
droveon our Business pretty well: One Day we came among some Dutch People at St.
Catherines, where we went on pretence to buy Goods that were privately got on
Shore: I was two or three times in a House, where we saw a good Quantity of
prohibited Goods, and my Companion once brought away three Peices of Dutch black
Silk that turn'd to good Account, and I had my Share of it; but in all the
Journeys I made by myself, I could not get an Opportunity to do any thing, so I
laid it aside; for I had been there so often, that they began to suspect
something.
    This baulk'd me a little, and I resolve'd to push at something or other, for
I was not us'd to come back so often without Purchase; so the next Day I dress'd
myself up fine, and took a Walk to the other End of the Town, I pass'd thro' the
Exchange in the Strand, but had no Notion of finding any thing to do there, when
on a sudden I saw a great Clutter in the Place, and all the People, Shopkeepers
as well as others, standing up, and staring, and what should it be? but some
great Dutchess come into the Exchange; and they said the Queen was coming; I set
myself close up to a Shop-side with my back to the Compter, as if to let the
Crowd pass by, when keeping my Eye upon a parcel of Lace, which the Shop-keeper
was showing to some Ladies that stood by me; the Shop-keeper and her Maid were
so taken up with looking to see who was a coming, and what Shop they would go
to, that I found means to slip a Paper of Lace into my Pocket, and come clear
off with it, so the Lady Millener paid dear enough for her gaping after the
Queen.
    I went off from the Shop, as if driven along by the Throng, and mingling
myself with the Crowd, went out at the other Door of the Exchange, and so got
away before they miss'd their Lace; and because I would not be follow'd, I
call'd a Coach and shut myself up in it; I had scarce shut the Coach Doors, but
I saw the Milleners Maid, and five or six more come running out into the Street,
and crying out as if they were frighted; they did not cry stop Thief, because no
body ran away, but I cou'd hear the Word robb'd, and Lace, two or three times,
and saw the Wench wringing her Hands, and run staring too, and again, like one
scar'd; the Coachman that had taken me up, was getting up into the Box, but was
not quite up, and the Horses had not begun to move, so that I was terrible
uneasy; and I took the Packet of Lace and laid it ready to have dropped it out at
the Flap of the Coach, which opens before, just behind the Coachman; but to my
great satisfaction in less than a Minute, the Coach began to move, that is to
say, as soon as the Coachman had got up, and spoken to his Horses; so he drove
away, and I brought off my Purchase, which was worth near twenty Pound.
    The next Day I dress'd me up again, but in quite different clothes, and
walk'd the same way again, but nothing offer'd till I came into St. James's Park
: I saw abundance of fine Ladies in the Park, walking in the Mall, and among the
rest, there was a little Miss, a young Lady of about 12 or 13 Years old, and she
had a Sister, as I suppose'd, with her, that might be about Nine: I observe'd the
biggest had a fine gold Watch on, and a good Necklace of Pearl, and they had a
Footman in Livery with them; but as it is not usual for the Footmen to go behind
the Ladies in the Mall; so I observe'd the Footman stop'd at their going into the
Mall, and the biggest of the Sisters spoke to him, to bid him be just there when
they came back.
    When I heard her dismiss the Footman, I step'd up to him, and ask'd him,
what little Lady that was? and held a little Chat with him, about what a pretty
Child it was with her, and how Genteel, and well Carriag'd, the eldest would be;
how womanish, and how Grave; and the Fool of a Fellow told me presently who she
was, that she was Sir Thomas -- 's eldest Daughter of Essex, and that she was a
great Fortune, that her Mother was not come to Town yet; but she was with Sir
William -- 's Lady at her Lodgings in Suffolk-Street, and a great deal more;
that they had a Maid and a Woman to wait on them, besides, Sir Thomas's Coach,
the Coachman and himself, and that young Lady was Governess to the whole Family,
as well here as at Home; and told me abundance of things enough for my business.
    I was well dress'd, and had my gold Watch, as well as she; so I left the
Footman, and I puts myself in a Rank with this Lady, having stay'd till she had
taken one Turn in the Mall, and was going forward again; by and by, I saluted
her by her Name, with the Title of Lady Betty: I ask'd her when she heard from
her Father? when my Lady her Mother would be in Town and how she did?
    I talk'd so familiarly to her of her whole Family that she cou'd not
suspect, but that I knew them all intimately: I ask'd her why she would come
Abroad without Mrs. Chime with her (that was the Name of her Woman) to take care
of Mrs. Judith, that was her Sister. Then I enter'd into a long Chat with her
about her Sister, what a fine little Lady she was, and ask'd her if she had
learn'd French, and a Thousand such little Things, when on a sudden the Guards
came, and the Crowd run to see the King go by to the Parliament-House.
    The Ladies run all to the Side of the Mall, and I help'd my Lady to stand
upon the edge of the Boards on the side of the Mall, that she might be high
enough to see; and took the little one and lifted her quite up; during which, I
took care to convey her gold Watch so clean away from the Lady Betty, that she
never miss'd it, till the Crowd was gone, and she was gotten into the middle of
the Mall.
    I took my leave in the very Crowd, and said, as if in haste, dear Lady Betty
take care of your little Sister, and so the Crowd did as it were, Thrust me
away, and that I was unwilling to take my leave.
    The hurry in such Cases is immediately over, and the Place clear as soon as
the King is gone by; but as there is always a great running and clutter just as
the King passes; so having drop'd the two little Ladies, and done my Business
with them, without any Miscarriage, I kept hurrying on among the Crowd, as if I
run to see the King, and so I kept before the Crowd, 'till I came to the End of
the Mall; when the King going on to ward the Horse-Guards; I went forward to the
Passage, which went then thro' against the End of the Hay-Market, and there I
bestow'd a Coach upon my self, and made off; and I confess I have not yet been
so good as my Word, (viz.) to go and visit my Lady Betty.
    I was once in the Mind to venture staying with Lady Betty, 'till she mist
the Watch, and so have made a great Out-cry about it with her, and have got her
into her Coach, and put my self in the Coach with her, and have gone Home with
her; for she appear'd so fond of me, and so perfectly deceive'd by my so readily
talking to her of all her Relations and Family, that I thought it was very easy
to push the thing farther, and to have got at least the Neck-Lace of Pearl; but
when I consider'd that tho' the Child would not perhaps have suspected me, other
People might, and that if I was search'd I should be discover'd; I thought it
was best to go off with what I had got.
    I came accidentally afterwards to hear, that when the young Lady miss'd her
Watch, she made a great Out-cry in the Park, and sent her Footman up and down,
to see if he could find me, she having describe'd me so perfectly, that he knew
it was the same Person that had stood and talked so long with him, and ask'd him
so many Questions about them; but I was gone far enough out of their reach,
before she could come at her Footman to tell him the Story.
    I made another Adventure after this, of a Nature different from all I had
been concern'd in yet, and this was at a Gaming House near Covent Garden.
    I saw several People go in and out; and I stood in the Passage a good while
with another Woman with me, and seeing a Gentleman go up that seem'd to be of
more than ordinary Fashion, I said to him, Sir, pray don't they give Women Leave
to go up? Yes Madam, says he, and to play too if they please; I mean so, Sir,
said I; and with that, he said he would introduce me if I had a Mind; so I
follow'd him to the Door, and he looking in, there, Madam, says he, are the
Gamesters, if you have a mind to venture; I look'd in, and said to my Comerade,
aloud, here's nothing but Men, I won't venture; at which one of the Gentlemen
cry'd out, you need not be afraid Madam, here's none but fair Gamesters, you are
very welcome to come and set what you please; so I went a little nearer and
look'd on, and some of them brought me a Chair, and I sat down and see the Box
and Dice go round a Pace; then I said to my Comrade, the gentlemen play too high
for us, come let us go.
    The People were all very civil, and one Gentleman encourage' me, and said,
come Madam, if you please to venture, if you dare trust me I'll answer for it;
you shall have nothing put upon you here; no Sir, said I, smiling, I hope the
Gentlemen would not Cheat a Woman; but still I decline'd venturing, tho' I pull'd
out a Purse with Money in it, that they might see I did not want Money.
    After I had sat a while, one Gentleman said to me Jeering, come Madam, I see
you are afraid to venture for your self; I always had good Luck with the Ladies,
you shall Set for me, if you won't Set for yourself; I told him, Sir I should be
very loth to loose your Money, tho' I added, I am pretty lucky too; but the
Gentlemen play so high, that I dare not venture my own.
    Well, well, says he, there's ten Guineas Madam, Set them for me; so I took
the Money and set, himself looking on; I run out the Guineas by One and Two at a
Time, and then the Box coming to the next Man to me, my Gentleman gave me ten
Guineas more, and made me Set Five of them at once, and the Gentleman who had
the Box threw out, so there was five Guineas of his Money again; he was
encourage'd at this, and made me take the Box, which was a bold Venture: However,
I held the Box so long that I gain'd him his whole Money, and had a Handful of
Guineas in my Lap, and which was the better Luck, when I threw out, I threw but
at One or Two of those that had Set me, and so went off easy.
    When I was come this Length, I offer'd the Gentleman all the Gold, for it
was his own; and so would have had him play for himself, pretending that I did
not understand the Game well enough: He laugh'd, and said if I had but good
Luck, it was no matter whether I understood the Game or no; but I should not
leave off: However he took out the 15 Guineas that he had put in first, and bad
me play with the Rest: I would have him to have seen how much I had got, but he
said, no, no, don't tell them, I believe you are very honest, and 'tis bad Luck
to tell them, so I play'd on.
    I understood the Game well enough, tho' I pretended I did not, and play'd
cautiously, which was to keep a good Stock in my Lap, out of which I every now
and then convey'd some into my Pocket; but in such a manner, as I was sure he
could not see it.
    I play'd a great while, and had very good Luck for him, but the last time I
held the Box, they Set me high, and I threw boldly at all; and held the Box
'till I had gain'd near fourscore Guineas, but lost above half of it back at the
last throw; so I got up, for I was afraid I should lose it all back again, and
said to him, pray come Sir now and take it and play for your self, I think I
have done pretty well for you: he would have had me play'd on, but it grew late,
and I desire'd to be excuse'd. When I gave it up to him, I told him I hop'd he
would give me Leave to tell it now, that I might see what he had gain'd, and how
Lucky I had been for him; when I told them there were threescore and three
Guineas. Ay, says I, if it had not been for that unlucky Throw I had got you a
hundred Guineas; so I gave him all the Money, but he would not take it 'till I
had put my Hand into it, and taken some for my self, and bid me please my self;
I refuse'd it, and was positive I would not take it my self, if he had a Mind to
do any Thing of that Kind it should be all his own doings.
    The rest of the Gentlemen seeing us striving, cry'd give it her all; but I
absolutely refuse'd that; then one of them said, D-n ye Jack, half it with her,
don't you know you should be always upon even Terms with the Ladies; so in
short, he divided it with me, and I brought away 30 Guineas, besides about 43,
which I had stole privately, which I was sorry for, because he was so generous.
    Thus I brought Home 73 Guineas, and let my old Governess see what good Luck
I had at Play: However it was her Advice that I should not venture again, and I
took her Council, for I never went there any more; for I knew as well as she, if
the Itch of Play came in, I might soon lose that, and all the rest of what I had
got.
    Fortune had smile'd upon me to that Degree, and I had thriven so much, and my
Governess too, for she always had a Share with me, that really the old
Gentlewoman began to talk of leaving off while we were well, and being satisfy'd
with what we had got; but, I know not what Fate guided me, I was as backward to
it now, as she was when I propos'd it to her before, and so in an ill Hour we
gave over the Thoughts of it for the present, and in a Word I grew more harden'd
and audacious than ever, and the Success I had, made my Name as famous as any
Thief of my sort ever had been.
    I had sometimes taken the Liberty to play the same Game over again, which is
not according to Practice, which however succeeded not amiss; but generally I
took up new Figures, and contrive'd to appear in new Shapes every time I went
abroad.
    It was now a rumbling time of the Year, and the Gentlemen being most of them
gone out of Town, Tunbridge, and Epsom, and such Places were full of People, but
the City was thin, and I thought our Trade felt it a little, as well as others;
so that at the latter End of the Year I joyn'd my self with a Gang, who usually
go every Year to Sturbridge Fair, and from thence to Bury Fair, in Suffolk: We
promised ourselves great Things here, but when I came to see how things were, I
was weary of it presently; for except meer picking of Pockets, there was little
worth meddling with; neither if a Booty had been made, was it so easy carrying
it off, nor was there such a Variety of Occasion for Business in our Way, as in
London; all that I made of the whole Journey, was a Gold Watch at Bury Fair, and
a small Parcel of Linnen at Cambridge, which gave me Occasion to take Leave of
the Place: It was an old Bite, and I thought might do with a Country
Shop-Keeper, tho' in London it would not.
    I bought at a Linnen Draper's Shop, not in the Fair, but in the Town of
Cambridge, as much fine Holland, and other Things as came to about seven Pound;
when I had done, I bad them be sent to such an Inn, where I had taken up my
Being the same Morning, as if I was to Lodge there that Night.
    I order'd the Draper to send them Home to me, about such an Hour, to the Inn
where I lay, and I would pay him his Money; at the Time appointed the Draper
sends the Goods, and I plac'd one of our Gang at the Chamber Door, and when the
Inn-Keeper's Maid brought the Messenger to the Door, who was a young Fellow, an
Apprentice, almost a Man; she tells him her Mistress was a sleep, but if he
would leave the Things, and call in about an Hour, I should be awake, and he
might have the Money; he left the Parcel very readily, and goes his way, and in
about half an Hour my Maid and I walk'd off, and that very Evening I hired a
Horse, and a Man to ride before me, and went to New-Market, and from thence got
my Passage in a Coach that was not quite full to St. Edmund's Bury; where as I
told you, I could make but little of my Trade, only at a little country Opera
House, I got a Gold Watch from a Ladies Side, who was not only intollerably
Merry, but a little Fuddled, which made my Work much easier.
    I made off with this little Booty to Ipswich, and from thence to Harwich,
where I went into an Inn, as if I had newly arrive'd from Holland, not doubting
but I should make some Purchase among the Foreigners that came on Shore there;
but I found them generally empty of Things of Value, except what was in their
Portmantuas, and Dutch Hampers, which were always guarded by Footmen; however, I
fairly got one of their Portmantuas one Evening out of the Chamber where the
Gentleman lay, the Footman being fast a sleep on the Bed, and I suppose very
Drunk.
    The Room in which I Lodg'd, lay next to the Dutchman's, and having dragg'd
the heavy thing with much ado out of the Chamber into mine; I went out into the
Street, to see if I could find any possibility of carrying it off; I walk'd
about a great while but could see no probability, either of getting out the
Thing, or of conveying away the Goods that was in it, the Town being so small,
and I a perfect Stranger in it; so I was returning with a Resolution to carry it
back again, and leave it where I found it; just in that very Moment I heard a
Man make a Noise to some People to make haste, for the Boat was going to put
off, and the Tyde would be spent; I call'd the Fellow, What Boat is it Friend,
said I, that you belong to? The Ipswich Wherry, Madam, says he. When do you go
off? says I. This Moment, Madam, says he; Do you want to go thither? Yes, said I
, if you can stay till I fetch my Things. Where are your Things Madam? says he.
At such an Inn, said I. Well, I'll go with you Madam, says he, very civilly, and
bring them for you; come away then, says I, and takes him with me.
    The People of the Inn were in a great Hurry, the Packet-Boat from Holland
being just come in, and two Coaches just come also with Passengers from London,
for another Packet-Boat that was going off for Holland, which Coaches were to go
back next Day with the Passengers that were just Landed: In this Hurry it was,
that I came to the Barr, and paid my Reckoning, telling my Landlady I had gotten
my Passage by Sea in a Wherry.
    These Wherries are large Vessels, with good Accommodation for carrying
Passengers from Harwich to London; and tho' they are call'd Wherries, which is a
Word us'd in the Thames for a small Boat, row'd with one or two Men; yet these
are Vessels able to carry twenty Passengers, and ten or fiveteen Ton of Goods,
and fitted to bear the Sea; all this I had found out by enquiring the Night
before into the several Ways of going to London.
    My Landlady was very Courteous, took my Money for the Reckoning, but was
call'd away, all the House being in a Hurry; so I left her, took the Fellow up
into my Chamber, gave him the Trunk, or Portmantua, for it was like a Trunk, and
wrapt it about with an old Apron, and he went directly to his Boat with it, and
I after him, no Body asking us the least Question about it; as for the drunken
Dutch Footman he was still a sleep, and his Master with other Foreign Gentlemen
at Supper, and very merry below; so I went clean off with it to Ipswich, and
going in the Night, the People of the House knew nothing, but that I was gone to
London, by the Harwich Wherry as I had told my Landlady.
    I was plagu'd at Ipswich with the Custom-House Officers, who stop'd my
Trunk, as I call'd it, and would open, and search it; I was willing I told them,
that they should Search it, but my Husband had the Key, and that he was not yet
come from Harwich; this I said, that if upon searching it, they should find all
the things be such, as properly belong'd to a Man rather than a Woman, it should
not seem strange to them; however, they being positive to open the Trunk, I
consented to have it broken open, that is to say, to have the Lock taken off,
which was not difficult.
    They found nothing for their turn, for the Trunk had been search'd before;
but they discover'd several Things much to my Satisfaction, as particularly a
Parcelof Money in French Pistoles, and some Dutch Ducatoons, or Rix Dollars, and
the rest was chiefly two Perriwigs, wearing Linnen, Rasors, Wash-Balls, Perfumes
and other useful Things Necessary for a Gentleman; which all pass'd for my
Husband's, and so I was quit of them.
    It was now very early in the Morning, and not Light; and I knew not well
what Course to take; for I made no Doubt but I should be pursue'd in the Morning,
and perhaps be taken with the things about me; so I resolve'd upon taking new
Measures; I went publicly to an Inn in the Town with my Trunk, as I call'd it,
and having taken the Substance out, I did not think the Lumber of it worth my
concern; however, I gave it the Landlady of the House with a Charge to take Care
of it, and lay it up safe till I should come again, and away I walk'd into the
Street.
    When I was got into the Town a great way from the Inn, I met with an ancient
Woman who had just open'd her Door, and I fell into Chat with her, and ask'd her
a great many wild Questions of things all remote to my Purpose and Design, but
in my Discourse I found by her how the Town was situated, that I was in a Street
which went out towards Hadly; but that such a Street went towards the
Water-side, such a Street went into the Heart of the Town; and at last, such a
Street went towards Colchester, and so the London Road lay there.
    I had soon my Ends of this old Woman; for I only wanted to know which was
the London Road, and away I walk'd as fast as I could; not that I intended to go
on Foot, either to London or to Colchester, but I wanted to get quietly away
from Ipswich.
    I walk'd about two or three Mile, and then I met a plain Countryman, who was
busy about some Husbandry work I did not know what; and I ask'd him a great many
Questions first, not much to the purpose; but at last told him I was going for
London, and the Coach was full, and I cou'd not get a Passage, and ask'd him if
he cou'd not tell me where to hire a Horse that would carry double, and an
honest Man to ride before me to Colchester, so that I might get a Place there in
the Coaches; the honest Clown look'd earnestly at me, and said nothing for above
half a Minute; when scratching his Pole, a Horse say you, and to Colchester to
carry double; why yes Mistress, alack-a-day, you may have Horses enough for
Money; well Friend, says I, that I take for granted, I don't expect it without
Money: Why but Mistress, says he, how much are you willing to give? nay, says I
again, Friend, I don't know what your Rates are in the Country here, for I am a
Stranger; but if you can get one for me, get it as Cheap as you can, and I'll
give you somewhat for your Pains.
    Why that's honestly said too, says the Countryman; not so honest neither,
said I, to myself, if thou knewest all; why Mistress, says he, I have a Horse
that will carry Double, and I don't much care if I go myself with you, an' you
like; Will you, says I? well I believe you are an honest Man, if you will, I
shall be glad of it, I'll pay you in Reason; why look ye Mistress, says he, I
won't be out of Reason with you, then if I carry you to Colchester, it will be
worth five Shillings for myself and my Horse, for I shall hardly come back to
Night.
    In short, I hir'd the honest Man and his Horse; but when we came to a Town
upon the Road, I do not remember the Name of it, but it stands upon a River, I
pretended myself very ill, and I could go no farther that Night, but if he would
stay there with me, because I was a Stranger I would pay him for himself, and
his Horse with all my Heart.
    This I did because I knew the Dutch Gentlemen and their Servants would be
upon the Road that Day, either in the Stage Coaches, or riding Post, and I did
not know but the drunken Fellow, or some body else that might have seen me at
Harwich, might see me again, and I thought that in one Days stop they would be
all gone by.
    We lay all that Night there, and the next Morning it was not very early when
I set out, so that it was near Ten a-Clock by that time I got to Colchester: It
was no little Pleasure that I saw the Town, where I had so many pleasant Days,
and I made many Enquiries after the good old Friends, I had once had there, but
could make little out, they were all dead or remove'd: The young Ladies had been
all married or gone to London; the old Gentleman, and the old Lady, that had
been my early Benefactress all dead; and which troubled me most, the young
Gentleman my first Lover, and afterwards my Brother-in-Law, was dead; but two
Sons Men grown, were left of him, but they too were Transplanted to London.
    I dismiss'd my old Man here, and stay'd incognito for three or four Days in
Colechester, and then took a Passage in a Waggon, because I would not venture
being seen in the Harwich Coaches; but I needed not have used so much Caution,
for there was no Body in Harwich, but the Woman of the House, could have known
me; nor was it rational to think that she, considering the hurry she was in, and
that she never saw me but once, and that by Candle light, should have ever
discover'd me.
    I was now return'd to London, and tho' by the Accident of the last
Adventure, I got something considerable, yet I was not fond of any more Country
rambles; nor should I have venture'd Abroad again if I had carried the Trade on
to the End of my Days; I gave my Governess a History of my Travels, she lik'd
the Harwich Journey well enough, and in Discoursing of these things between
ourselves she observe'd, that a Thief being a Creature that Watches the
Advantages of other Peoples mistakes, 'tis impossible but that to one that is
vigilant and industrious many Opportunities must happen, and therefore she
thought that one so exquisitely keen in the Trade as I was, would scarce fail of
something wherever I went.
    On the other hand, every Branch of my Story, if duly consider'd, may be
useful to honest People, and afford a due Caution to People of some sort, or
other, to Guard against the like Surprizes, and to have their Eyes about them
when they have to do with Strangers of any kind, for 'tis very seldom that some
Snare or other is not in their way. The Moral indeed of all my History is left
to be gather'd by the Senses and judgement of the Reader; I am not Qualified to
preach to them, let the Experience of one Creature completely Wicked, and
completely Miserable, be a Storehouse of useful warning to those that read.
    I am drawing now towards a new Variety of Life: Upon my return, being
hardened by a long Race of Crime, and Success unparallel'd, I had, as I have
said, no thoughts of laying down a Trade, which if I was to judge by the Example
of others, must however End at last in Misery and Sorrow.
    It was on the Christmas-day following, in the Evening, that to finish a long
Train of Wickedness, I went Abroad to see what might offer in my way; when going
by a Working Silver-Smith's in Foster-lane, I saw a tempting Bait indeed, and
not to be resisted by one of my Occupation; for the Shop had no Body in it, and
a great deal of loose Plate lay in the Window, and at the Seat of the Man, who I
suppose Work'd at one side of the Shop.
    I went boldly in and was just going to lay my Hand upon a peice of Plate,
and might have done it, and carried it clear off, for any care that the Men who
belong'd to the Shop had taken of it; but an officious Fellow in a House, on the
other Side of the Way, seeing me go in, and that there was no Body in the Shop,
comes running over the Street, and without asking me what I was, or who, seizes
upon me, and cries out for the People of the House.
    I had not touch'd any thing in the Shop, and seeing a glimpse of some Body
running over, I had so much presence of Mind, as to knock very hard with my Foot
on the Floor of the House, and was just calling out too, when the Fellow laid
Hands on me.
    However as I had always most Courage, when I was in most danger; so when he
laid Hands on me, I stood very high upon it, that I came in, to buy half a Dozen
of silver Spoons, and to my good Fortune, it was a Silver-smith's that sold
Plate, as well as work'd Plate, for other Shops: The Fellow laugh'd at that
Part, and put such a value upon the Service that he had done his Neighbour, that
he would have it be, that I came not to buy, but to steal, and raising a great
Crowd, I said to the Master of the Shop, who by this time was fetch'd Home from
some Neighbouring Place, that it was in vain to make a Noise, and enter into
Talk there of the Case; the Fellow had insisted, that I came to steal, and he
must prove it, and I desire'd we might go before a Magistrate without any more
Words; for I began to see I should be too hard for the Man that had seize'd me.
    The Master and Mistress of the Shop were really not so violent, as the man
from tother side of the Way; and the Man said, Mistress you might come into the
Shop with a good Design for ought I know, but it seem'd a dangerous thing for
you to come into such a Shop as mine is, when you see no Body there, and I
cannot do so little Justice to my Neightbour, who was so kind, as not to
acknowledge he had Reason on his Side; tho' upon the whole I do not find you
attempt'd to take any thing, and I really know not what to do in it: I press'd
him to go before a Magistrate with me, and if any thing cou'd be prov'd on me,
that was like a design, I should willingly submit, but if not I expected
reparation.
    Just while we were in this Debate, and a Crowd of People gather'd about the
Door, came by Sir T.B., an Alderman of the City, and Justice of the Peace, and
the Goldsmith hearing of it, entreated his Worship to come in and decide the
Case.
    Give the Goldsmith his due, he told his Story with a great deal of Justice
and Moderation, and the Fellow that had come over, and seize'd upon me, told his
with as much Heat, and foolish Passion, which did me good still: It came then to
my turn to speak, and I told his Worship that I was a Stranger in London, being
newly come out of the North, that I Lodg'd in such a Place, that I was passing
this Street, and went into a Goldsmith's Shop to buy half a Dozen of Spoons; by
great good Luck I had an old silver Spoon in my Pocket, which I pull'd out, and
told him I had carried that Spoon to match it with half a Dozen of new ones,
that it might match some I had in the Country.
    That seeing no Body in the Shop, I knock'd with my Foot very hard to make
the People hear, and had also call'd aloud with my Voice: 'Tis true, there was
loose Plate in the Shop, but that no Body cou'd say I had touch'd any of it;
that a Fellow came running into the Shop out of the Street, and laid Hands on me
in a furious manner, in the very Moment, while I was calling for the People of
the House; that if he had really had a mind to have done his Neighbour any
Service, he should have stood at a distance, and silently watch'd to see whether
I had touch'd any thing, or no, and then have taken me in the Fact: That is very
true, says Mr. Alderman, and turning to the Fellow that stopped me, he ask'd him
if it was true that I knock'd with my Foot? he said yes I had knock'd, but that
might be because of his coming; Nay, says the Alderman taking him short, now you
contradict yourself, for just now you said, she was in the Shop with her back to
you, and did not see you till you came upon her; now it was true, that my back
was partly to the Street, but yet as my Business was of a kind that require'd me
to have Eyes every way, so I really had a glance of him running over, as I said
before, tho' he did not perceive it.
    After a full hearing, the Alderman gave it as his Opinion, that his
Neighbour was under a Mistake, and that I was Innocent, and the Goldsmith
acquiesc'd in it too, and his Wife, and so I was dismiss'd; but as I was going
to depart, Mr. Alderman said, but bold Madam, if you were designing to buy
Spoons I hope you will not let my Friend here lose his Customer by the Mistake:
I readily answered, no Sir, I'll buy the Spoons still if he can Match my odd
Spoon, which I brought for a Pattern, and the Goldsmith show'd me some of the
very same Fashion; so he weigh'd the Spoons, and they came to five and thirty
Shillings, so I pulls out my Purse to pay him, in which I had near 20 Guineas,
for I never went without such a Sum about me, whatever might happen, and I found
it of use at other times as well as now.
    When Mr. Alderman saw my Money, be said, well Madam, now I am satify'd you
were wrong'd, and it was for this Reason, that I mov'd you should buy the
Spoons, and staid till you had bought them, for if you had not had Money to pay
for them, I should have suspected that you did not come into the Shop to buy,
for the sort of People who come upon those Designs that you have been Charg'd
with, are seldom troubl'd with much Gold in their Pockets, as I see you are.
    I smile'd, and told his Worship, that then I ow'd something of his Favour to
my Money, but I hop'd he saw Reason also in the Justice he had done me before;
he said, yes he had, but this had confirm'd his Opinion, and he was fully
satisfy'd now of my having been injur'd; so I came well off from an Affair, in
which I was at the very brink of Destruction.
    It was but three Days after this, that not at all made Cautious by my former
Danger as I us'd to be, and still pursuing the Art which I had so long been
employ'd in, I venture'd into a House where I saw the Doors open, and furnish'd
myself as I thought verily without being perceive'd, with two Peices of flower'd
Silks, such as they call Brocaded Silk, very rich; it was not a Mercers Shop,
nor a Warehouse of a Mercer, but look'd like a private Dwelling-House, and was
it seems Inhabited by a Man that sold Goods for a Weaver to the Mercers, like a
Broker or Factor.
    That I may make short of the black Part of this Story, I was attack'd by two
Wenches that came open Mouth'd at me just as I was going out at the Door, and
one of them pull'd me back into the Room, while the other shut the Door upon me;
I would have given them good Words, but there was no room for it; two fiery
Dragons cou'd not have been more furious, they Tore my clothes, Bully'd and
Roar'd, as if they would have murder'd me; the Mistress of the House came next,
and then the Master, and all outrageous.
    I gave the Master very good Words, told him the Door was open, and things
were a Temptation to me, that I was poor, and distress'd, and Poverty was what
many could' not resist, and beg'd him with Tears to have pity on me; the
Mistress of the House was mov'd with Compassion, and enclin'd to have let me go,
and had almost persuaded her Husband to it also, but the saucy Wenches were run
even before they were sent, and had fetch'd a Constable, and then the Master
said, he could not go back, I must go before a Justice, and answer'd his Wife
that he might come into Trouble himself if he should let me go.
    The sight of a Constable indeed struck me, and I thought I should have sunk
into the Ground; I fell into faintings, and indeed the People themselves thought
I would have died, when the Woman argued again for me, and entreated her
Husband, seeing they had lost nothing to let me go: I offer'd him to pay for the
two Peices whatever the value was, tho' I had not got them, and argu'd that as
he had his Goods, and had really lost nothing, it would be cruel to pursue me to
Death and have my Blood for the bare Attempt of taking them. I put the Constable
in mind too that I had broke no Doors, nor carried any thing away; and when I
came to the Justice, and pleaded there that I had neither broken any thing to
get in, nor carried any thing out, the Justice was enclin'd to havereleas'd me;
but the first saucy Jade that stop'd me, affirming that I was going out with the
Goods, but that she stop'd me and pull'd me back, the Justice upon that point
committed me, and I was carried to Newgate; that horrid Place! my very Blood
chills at the mention of its Name; the Place, where so many of my Comrades had
been lock'd up, and from whence they went to the fatal Tree; the Place where my
Mother suffered so deeply, where I was brought into the World, and from whence I
expected no Redemption, but by an infamous Death: To conclude, the Place that
had so long expected me, and which with so much art and Success I had so long
avoided.
    I was now fix'd indeed; 'tis impossible to describe the terror of my Mind,
when I was first brought in, and when I look'd round upon all the horrors of
that dismal Place: I look'd on my self as lost, and that I had nothing to think
of, but of going out of the World, and that with the utmost Infamy; the hellish
Noise, the Roaring, Swearing and Clamour, the Stench and Nastiness, and all the
dreadful Afflicting things that I saw there; joyn'd to make the Place seem an
Emblem of Hell itself, and a kind of an Entrance into it.
    Now Ireproach'd my self with the many hints I had had - as I have mention'd
above, from my own Reason, from the Sense of my good Circumstances, and of the
many Dangers I had escape'd to leave off while I was well, and how I had
withstood them all and hardened my Thoughts against all Fear; it seem'd to me
that I was hurried on by an inevitable Fate to this Day of Misery, and that now
I was to Expiate all my Offences at the Gallows, that I was now to give
satisfaction to Justice with my Blood, and that I was to come to the last Hour
of my Life, and of my Wickedness together: These things pour'd themselves in
upon my Thoughts in a confuse'd manner, and left me overwhelm'd with Melancholly
and Despair.
    Then I repented heartily of all my Life past, but that Repentance yielded me
no Satisfaction, no Peace, no not in the least, because, as I said to myself, it
was repenting after the Power of farther Sinning was taken away: I seem'd not to
Mourn that I had committed such Crimes, and for the Fact, as it was an Offence
against God and my Neighbour; but that I was to be punish'd for it; I was a
Penitent as I thought, not that I had sinn'd, but that I was to suffer, and this
took away all the Comfort of my Repentance in my own Thoughts.
    I got no sleep for several Nights or Days after I came into that wretch'd
Place, and glad I wou'd have been for some time to have died there, tho' I did
not consider dying as it ought to be consider'd neither; indeed nothing could be
fill'd with more horror to my Imagination than the very Place, nothing was more
odious to me than the Company that was there: O! if I had but been sent to any
Place in the World, and not to Newgate, I should have thought myself happy.
    In the next Place, how did the harden'd Wretches that were there before me
Triumph over me? what! Mrs. Flanders come to Newgate at last? what, Mrs. Mary,
Mrs. Molly, and after that plain Moll Flanders? They thought the Devil had
help'd me, they said, that I had reign'd so long: They expected me there many
Years ago they said, and was I come at last? then they flouted me with
Dejections, welcom'd me to the Place, wish'd me Joy, bid me have a good Heart,
not be cast down, things might not be so bad as I fear'd, and the like; then
call'd for Brandy, and drank to me; but put it all up to my Score, for they told
me I was but just come to the College, as they call'd it, and sure I had Money
in my Pocket, tho' they had none.
    I ask'd one of this Crew how long she had been there? she said four Months;
I ask'd her how the Place look'd to her when she first came into it; just as it
did now to me, says she, dreadful and frightful, that she thought she was in
Hell, and I believe so still, adds she, but it is natural to me now, I don't
disturb myself about it: I suppose, says I, you are in no danger of what is to
follow: Nay, says she, you are mistaken there I am sure, for I am under
Sentence, only I pleaded my Belly, but am no more with Child, than the Judge
that try'd me, and I expect to be called down next session; this CALLING DOWN is
calling down to their former Judgement, when a Woman has been respited for her
Belly, but proves not to be with Child, or if she has been with Child, and has
been brought to Bed. Well says I, and are you thus easy? ay, says she, I can't
help myself, what signifyes being sad? If I am hang'd there's an End of me, and
away she turn'd Dancing, and Sings as she goes, the following Piece of Newgate
Wit,
 
                           If I swing by the String,
                          I shall hear the Bell ring,1
                     And then there's an End of poor Jenny.
 
I mention this, because it would be worth the Observation of any Prisoner, who
shall hereafter fall into the same Misfortune and come to that dreadful Place of
Newgate; how Time, Necessity, and Conversing with the Wretches that are there
Familiarizes the Place to them; how at last they become reconcil'd to that which
at first was the greatest Dread upon their Spirits in the World, and are as
impudently Chearful and Merry in their Misery, as they were when out of it.
    I cannot say, as some do, this Devil is not so black, as he is painted; for
indeed no Colours can represent that Place to the Life; nor any Soul Conceive
aright of it, but those who have been Sufferers there: But how Hell should
become by degrees so natural, and notonly tollerable, but even agreeable, is a
thing Unintelligible, but by those who have Experienc'd it as I have.
    The same Night that I was sent to Newgate, I sent the News of it to my old
Governess, who was Surprise'd at it you may be sure, and spent the Night almost
as ill out of Newgate, as I did in it.
    The next Morning, she came to see me, she did what she cou'd to Comfort me,
but she saw that was to no purpose, however, as she said, to sink under the
Weight, was but to increase the Weight; she immediately applied herself to all
the proper Methods to prevent the Effects of it, which we fear'd; and first she
found out the two fiery Jades that had Surprise'd me; she tamper'd with them,
persuaded them, offer'd them Money, and in a Word, try'd all imaginable ways to
prevent a Prosecution; she offer'd one of the Wenches 100l. to go away from her
Mistress, and not to appear against me; but she was so resolute, that tho' she
was but a Servant Maid at 3l. a Year Wages or thereabouts, she refuse'd it, and
would have refuse'd, as my Governess said she believe'd, if she had offer'd her
500l. Then she attack'd the other Maid, she was not so hard-Hearted as the
other; and sometimes seem'd enclin'd to be merciful; but the first Wench kept
her up, and would not so much as let my Governess talk with her, but threatn'd
to have her up for Tampering with the Evidence.
    Then she apply'd to the Master, that is to say, the Man whose Goods had been
stol'n, and particularly to his Wife, who was enclin'd at first to have some
Compassion for me; she found the Woman the same still, but the Man alledg'd he
was bound to Prosecute, and that he should forfeit his Recognizance.
    My Governess offer'd to find Friends that should get his Recognizances off
of the File, as they call it, and that he should not suffer; but it was not
possible to Convince him, that he could be safe any way in the World, but by
appearing against me; so I was to have three Witnesses of Fact against me, the
Master and his two Maids, that is to say, I was as certain to be cast for my
Life, as I was that I was alive, and I had nothing to do, but to think of dying:
I had but a sad foundation to build upon for that, as I said before, for all my
Repentance appear'd to me to be only the Effect of my fear of Death, not a
sincere regret for the wicked Life that I had liv'd, and which had brought this
Misery upon me, or for the offending my Creator, who was now suddenly to be my
Judge.
    I liv'd many Days here under the utmost horror; I had Death as it were in
view, and thought of nothing Night or Day, but of Gibbets and Halters, evil
Spirits and Devils; it is not to be expressed how I was harass'd, between the
dreadful Apprehensions of Death, and the Terror of my Conscience reproaching me
with my past horrible Life.
    The Ordinary of Newgate came to me, and talk'd a little in his way, but all
his Divinity run upon Confessing my Crime, as he call'd it, (tho' he knew not
what I was in for) making a full Discovery, and the like, without which he told
me God would never forgive me; and he said so little to the Purpose that I had
no manner of Consolation from him; and then to observe the poor Creature
preaching Confession and Repentance to me in the Morning, and find him drunk
with Brandy by Noon; this had something in it so shocking, that I began to
nauseate the Man, and his Work too by Degrees, for the sake of the Man; so that
I desired him to trouble me no more.
    I know not how it was, but by the indefatigable Application of my diligent
Governess I had no Bill preferr'd against me the first Sessions, I mean to the
Grand Jury, at Guild-Hall; so I had another Month, or five Weeks before me, and
without Doubt this ought to have been accepted by me, as so much Time given me
for Reflection upon what was past, and Preparation for what was to come; I ought
to have esteem'd it, as a Space given me for Repentance, and have employ'd it as
such; but it was not in me, I was sorry (as before) for being in Newgate, but
had few Signs of Repentance about me.
    On the Contrary, like the Water in the Hollows of Mountains, which
petrifies, and turns into Stone whatever they are suffer'd to drop upon; so the
continual conversing with such a Crew of Hell-Hounds had the same common
Operation upon me, as upon other People; I degenerated into Stone, I turn'd
first Stupid and Senseless, and then Brutish and Thoughtless, and at last raving
Mad as any of them were; in short, I become as naturally pleas'd and easy with
the Place, as if indeed I had been Born there.
    It is scarce possible to imagine that our Natures should be capable of so
much Degeneracy, as to make that pleasant and agreeable that in it self is the
most complete Misery. Here was a Circumstance, that I think it is scarce
possible to mention a worse; I was as exquisitely miserable, as it was possible
for any one to be, that had Life and Health, and Money to help them as I had.
    I had a Weight of Guilt upon me, enough to sink any Creature who had the
least Power of Reflection left, and had any Sense upon them of the Happiness of
this Life, or the Misery of another; I had at first, some Remorse indeed, but no
Repentance; I had now, neither Remorse or Repentance: I had a Crime charge'd on
me, the Punishment of which was Death; the Proof so Evident, that there was no
Room for me, so much as to plead not guilty; I had the Name of an old Offender,
so that I had nothing to expect but Death, neither had I myself any thoughts of
escaping, and yet a certain strange Lethargy of Soul possess'd me, I had no
Trouble, no Apprehensions, no Sorrow about me, the first Surprise was gone; I
was, I may well say, I know not how; my Senses, my Reason, nay, my Conscience,
were all a-sleep; my Course of Life for forty Years had been a horrid
Complication of Wickedness; Whoredom, Adultery, Incest, Lying, Theft, and, in a
Word, everything but Murther, and Treason, had been my Practice, from the Age of
Eighteen, or thereabouts to Threescore; and now I was ingulph'd in the Misery of
Punishment, and had an infamous Death at the Door, and yet I had no Sense of my
Condition, no Thought of Heaven or Hell, at least, that went any farther than a
bare flying Touch, like the Stitch or Pain that gives a Hint and goes off; I
neither had a Heart to ask God's Mercy, or indeed to think of it, and in this I
think I have given a brief Description of the compleatest Misery on Earth.
    All my terrifying Thoughts were past, the Horrors of the Place, were become
familiar, and I felt no more Uneasiness at the Noise and Clamours of the Prison,
than they did who made that Noise; in a Word, I was become a meer Newgate-Bird,
as wicked and as outragious as any of them; nay, I scarce retain'd the Habit and
Custom of good Breeding and Manners, which all along 'till now run thro' my
Conversation; so thoro' a Degeneracy had possess'd me, that I was no more the
same Thing that I had been, than if I had never been otherwise than what I was
now.
    In the middle of this harden'd Part of my Life, I had another sudden
Surprise, which call'd me back a little to that Thing call'd Sorrow, which,
indeed, I began to be past the Sense of before: They told me one Night, that
there was brought into the Prison late the Night before, three Highway-Men, who
had committed a Robbery somewhere, on Hounslow-Heath, I think it was, and were
pursue'd to Uxbridge by the Country, and there taken after a gallant Resistance,
in which, many of the Country People were wounded, and some kill'd.
    It is not to be wonder'd that we Prisoners, were all desirous enough to see
these brave, topping Gentlemen that were talk'd up to be such, as their Fellows
had not been known, andespecially because it was said they would in the Morning
be remove'd into the Press-Yard, having given Money to the head Master of the
Prison, to be allow'd the Liberty of that better Place: So we that were Women
plac'd our selves in the Way that we would be sure to see them; but nothing
could express the Amazement and Surprise I was in, when the first Man that came
out, I knew to be my Lancashire Husband, the same with whom I liv'd so well at
Dunstable, and the same who I afterwards saw at Brickill, when I was married to
my last Husband, as has been related.
    I was struck Dumb at the Sight, and knew neither what to say, or what to do;
he did not know me, and that was all the present Relief I had, I quitted my
Company, and retire'd as much as that dreadful Place suffers any Body to retire,
and cry'd vehemently for a great while; dreadful Creature, that I am, said I,
How many poor People have I made Miserable? How many desperate Wretches have I
sent to the Devil? This Gentleman's Misfortunes I plac'd all to my own Account:
He had told me at Chester, he was ruin'd by that Match, and that his Fortunes
were made desperate on my Account; for that thinking I had been a Fortune, he
was run into Debt more than he was able to pay; that he would go into the Army,
and carry a Musquet, or buy a Horse and take a Tour, as he call'd it; and tho' I
never told him that I was a Fortune, and so did not actually deceive him my
self, yet I did incourage its having it thought so, and so I was the Occasion
originally of his Mischief.
    The Surprise of this Thing only, struck deeper in my Thoughts, and gave me
stronger Reflections than all that had befallen me before; I grieve'd Day and
Night, and the more, for that they told me, he was the Captain of the Gang, and
that he had committed so many Robberies, that Hind, or Whitney, or the Golden
Farmer were Fools to him; that he would surely be hang'd if there were no more
Men left in the Country; and that there would be abundance of People come in
against him.
    I was overwhelm'd with Grief for him; my own Case gave me no Disturbance
compar'd to this, and I loaded my self with Reproaches on his Account; I
bewail'd my Misfortunes, and the Ruin he was now come to, at such a Rate, that I
relish'd nothing now, as I did before, and the first Reflections I made upon the
horrid Life I had liv'd, began to return upon me, and as these Things return'd,
my Abhorrence of the Place, and of the Way of living in it, return'd also; in a
Word, I was perfectly chang'd, and become another Body.
    While I was under these Influences of Sorrow for him, came Notice to me that
the next Sessions there would be a Bill preferr'd to the Grand Jury against me,
and that I should be try'd for my Life: My Temper was touch'd before, the
wretched Boldness of Spirit, which I had acquir'd, abated, and conscious Guilt
began to flow in my Mind: In short, I began to think, and to think indeed is one
real Advance from Hell to Heaven; all that harden'd State and Temper of Soul,
which I said so much of before, is but a Deprivation of Thought; he that is
restor'd to his Thinking, is restor'd to himself.
    As soon as I began, I say to think, the first thing that occur'd to me
broke out thus; Lord! what will become of me? I shall be cast to be sure, and
there is nothing beyond that, but Death! I have no Friends, what shall I do? I
shall be certainly Cast! Lord! have Mercy upon me! What will become of me! This
was a sad Thought, you will say, to be the first (after so long Time) that had
started in my Soul of that kind, and yet, even this was nothing, but Fright, at
what was to come; there was not a Word of sincere Repentance in it all. However,
I was dreadfully dejected, and disconsolate to the last Degree; and as I had no
Friend to communicate my distress'd Thoughts to, it lay so heavy upon me, that
it threw me into Fits, and Swoonings several times a Day. I sent for my old
Governess, and she, give her, her Due, acted the Part of a true Friend, she left
no Stone unturn'd to prevent the Grand Jury finding the Bill; she went to
several of the Jury Men, talk'd with them, and endeavour'd to possess them with
favourable Dispositions, on Account that nothing was taken away, and no House
broken, &amp; c. but all would not do; the two Wenches swore home to the Fact,
and the Jury found the Bill for Robbery and House-breaking, that is for Felony
and Burglary.
    I sunk down when they brought the News of it, and after I came to my self, I
thought I should have died with the Weight of it: My Governess acted a true
Mother to me, she pitty'd me, she cry'd with me, and for me; but she could not
help me; and to add to the Terror of it, 'twas the Discourse all over the House,
that I should dye for it; I could hear them talk it among themselves very often;
and see them shake their Heads, and say they were sorry for it, and the like, as
is usual in the Place; but still no Body came to tell me their Thoughts, till at
last one of the Keepers came to me privately, and said with a Sigh, well Mrs.
Flanders, you will be try'da Friday (this was but a Wednesday) what do you
intend to do? I turn'd as white as a Clout, and said, God knows what I shall do,
for my part I know not what to do; why, says he, I won't Flatter you, I would
have you prepare for Death, for I doubt you will be Cast; and as you are an old
Offender, I doubt you will find but little Mercy: They say, added he, your Case
is very plain, and that the Witnesses swear so home against you, there will be
no standing it.
    This was a stab into the very Vitals of one under such a Burden, and I could
not speak a Word good or bad, for a great while; at last I burst out into Tears,
and said to him, O Sir, What must I do? Do, says he, send for a Minister, and
talk with him; for indeed Mrs. Flanders, unless you have very good Friends, you
are no Woman for this World.
    This was plain dealing indeed, but it was very harsh to me, at least
Ithought it so: Heleft me in the greatest Confusion imaginable, and all that
Night I lay awake; and now I began to say my Prayers, which I had scarce done
before since my last Husband's Death, or from a little while after; and truly I
may well call it, saying my Prayers; for I was in such a Confusion, and had such
horror upon my Mind, that tho' I cry'd, and repeated several times the Ordinary
Expression of, Lord have Mercy upon me; I never brought myself to any Sense of
being a miserable Sinner, as indeed I was, and of Confessing my Sins to God, and
begging Pardon for the sake of Jesus Christ; I was overwhelm'd with the Sense of
my Condition, being try'd for my Life, and being sure to be Executed, and on
this Account, I cry'd out all Night, Lord! what will become of me? Lord! what
shall I do? Lord have mercy upon me, and the like.
    My poor afflicted Governess was now as much concern'd as I, and a great deal
more truly Penitent; tho' she had no prospect of being brought to a Sentence,
not but that she deserve'd it as much as I, and so she said herself; but she had
not done any thing for many Years, other than receiving what I, and others had
stolen, and encouraging us to steal it: But she cry'd and took on, like a
distracted Body, wringing her Hands, and crying out that she was undone, that
she believe'd there was a Curse from Heaven upon her, that she should be damn'd,
that she had been the Destruction of all her Friends, that she brought such a
one, and such a one, and such a one to the Gallows; and there she reckon'd up
ten or eleven People, some of which I have given an Account of that came to
untimely Ends, and that now she was the occasion of my Ruin, for she had
persuaded me to go on, when I would have left off. I interrupted her there; no,
Mother, no, said I, don't speak of that, for you would have had me left off when
I got the Mercer's Money again, and when I came home from Harwich, and I would
not hearken to you, therefore you have not been to blame, it is I only have
ruin'd myself, I have brought myself to this Misery; and thus we spent many
Hours together.
    Well, there was no Remedy, the Prosecution went on, and on the Thursday I
was carried down to the Sessions-House, where I was arraign'd, as they call'd
it, and the next Day I was appointed to be Try'd. At the Arraignment I pleaded
not guilty, and well I might, for I was indicted for Felony and Burglary; that
is for feloniously stealing two Peices of Brocaded Silk, value 46l., the Goods
of Anthony Johnson, and for breaking open the Doors; whereas I knew very well
they could not pretend I had broken up the Doors, or so much as lifted up a
Latch.
    On the Friday I was brought to my Tryal, I had exhausted my Spirits with
Crying for two or three Days before, that I slept better the Thursday Night than
I expected, and had more Courage for my Tryal, than I thought possible for me to
have.
    When the Tryal began, and the Indictment was read, I would have spoke, but
they told me the Witnesses must be heard first, and then I should have time to
be heard. The Witnesses were the two Wenches, a Couple of hard Mouth'd Jades
indeed, for tho' the thing was Truth in the main, yet they aggravated it to the
utmost extremity, and swore I had the Goods wholly in my possession, that I had
hid them among my clothes, that I was going off with them, that I had one Foot
over the Threshold when they discover'd themselves, and then I put t'other over,
sothat I was quite out of the House in the Street with the Goods before they
took me, and then they seize'd me, and took the Goods upon me: The Fact in
general was true, but I insisted upon it, that they stop'd me before I had set
my Foot clear of the Threshold: but that did not argue much, for I had taken the
Goods and was bringing them away, if I had not been taken.
    I pleaded that I had stole nothing, they had lost nothing, that the Door was
open, and I went in with Design to buy, if seeing no Body in the House, I had
taken any of them up in my Hand, it cou'd not be concluded that I intended to
steal them, for that I never carried them farther than the Door to look on them
with the better Light.
    The Court would not allow that by any means, and made a kind of a Jest of my
intending to buy the Goods, that being no Shop for the Selling of any thing, and
as to carrying them to the Door to look at them, the Maids made their impudent
Mocks upon that, and spent their Wit upon it very much; told the Court I had
look'd at them sufficiently, and approv'd them very well, for I had pack'd them
up, and was a going with them.
    In short, I was found Guilty of Felony, but acquited of the Burglary, which
was but small Comfort to me, the first bringing me to a Sentence of Death, and
the last would have done no more: The next Day, I was carried down to receive
the dreadful Sentence, and when they came to ask me what I had to say, why
Sentence should not pass, I stood mute a while, but some Body prompted me aloud
to speak to the Judges, for that they cou'd represent things favourably for me:
This encourage'd me, and I told them I had nothing to say to stop the Sentence;
but that I had much to say, to bespeak the Mercy of the Court, that I hop'd they
would allow something in such a Case, for the Circumstances of it, that I had
broken no Doors, had carried nothing off, that no Body had lost any thing; that
the Person whose Goods they were, was pleas'd to say, he desire'd Mercy might be
shown, which indeed he very honestly did, that at the worst it was the first
Offence, and that I had never been before any Court of Justice before; and in a
Word, I spoke with more Courage than I thought I cou'd have done, and in such a
moving Tone, and tho' with Tears, [yet not so many Tears as to obstruct my
Speech,] that I cou'd see it mov'd others to Tears that heard me.
    The Judges sat Grave and Mute, gave me an easy Hearing, and time to say all
that I would, but saying neither Yes, or No to it, Pronounc'd the Sentence of
Death upon me; a Sentence to me like Death itself, which confounded me; I had no
more Spirit left in me, I had no Tongue to speak, or Eyes to look up either to
God or Man.
    My poor Governess was utterly Disconsolate, and she that was my Comforter
before, wanted Comfort now herself, and sometimes Mourning, sometimes Raging,
was as much out of herself as any mad Woman in Bedlam: Nor was she only
Disconsolate as to me, but she was struck with Horror at the Sense of her own
wicked Life, and began to look back upon it with a Taste quite different from
mine; for she was Penitent to the highest Degree for her Sins, as well as
Sorrowful for the Misfortune: She sent for a Minister too, a serious pious good
Man, and apply'd herself with such earnestness by his assistance to the Work of
a sincere Repentance, that I believe, and so did the Minister too, that she was
a true Penitent, and which is still more, she was not only so for the Occasion,
and at that Juncture, but she continue'd so, as I was inform'd, to the Day of her
Death.
    It is rather to be thought of, than express'd, what was now my Condition; I
had nothing before me but Death; and as I had no Friends to assist me, I
expected nothing but to find my Name in the Dead Warrant, which was to come for
the Execution next Friday, of five more and myself.
    In the mean time my poor distress'd Governess sent me a Minister, who at her
request came to visit me: He exhorted me seriously to repent of all my Sins, and
to dally no longer with my Soul; not flattering myself with hopes of Life, which
he said, he was inform'd there was no room to expect, but unfeign'dly to look up
to God with my whole Soul, and to cry for Pardon in the Name of Jesus Christ. He
back'd his Discourses with proper Quotations of Scripture, encouraging the
greatest Sinner to repent, and turn from their evil Way, and when he had done,
he kneeled down and pray'd with me.
    It was now, that for the first Time, I felt any real Signs of Repentance; I
now began to look back upon my past Life with abhorrence, and having a kind of
View into the other Side of Time, the Things of Life, as I believe they do with
every Body at such a Time, began to look with a different Aspect, and quite
another Shape, than they did before: The Views of felicity, the joy, the Griefs
of Life were quite other Things; and I had nothing in my Thoughts, but was so
infinitely Superiour to what I had known in Life, that it appear'd to be the
greatest stupidity to lay a Weight upon any thing tho' the most valuable in this
World.
    The Word Eternity represented it self with all its incomprehensible
Additions, and I had such extended Notions of it, that I know not how to express
them: Among the rest, how absurd did every pleasant Thing look? I mean, that we
had counted pleasant before; when I reflected that these sordid Trifles were the
things for which we forfeited eternal Felicity.
    With these Reflections came in of meer Course, severe Reproaches for my
wretched Behaviour in my past Life; that I had forfeited all hope of Happiness
in the Eternity that I was just going to enter into; and on the Contrary, was
entitled to all that was miserable; and all this with the frightful Addition of
its being also Eternal.
    I am not capable of reading Lectures of Instruction to any Body, but I
relate this in the very manner in which things then appear'd to me, as far as I
am able; but infinitely short of the lively impressions which they made on my
Soul at that time; indeed those Impressions are not to be explain'd by words, or
if they are, I am not Mistress of Words to express them; It must be the Work of
every sober Reader to make just Reflections, as their own Circumstances may
direct; and, this is what every one at some time or other may feel something of;
I mean a clearer Sight into things to come, than they had here, and a dark view
of their own Concern in them.
    But I go back to my own Case; the Minister press'd me to tell him, as far as
I thought convenient, in what State I found myself as to the Sight I had of
things beyond Life; he told me he did not come as Ordinary of the Place, whose
business it is to extort Confessions from Prisoners, for the farther detecting
of other Offenders; that his business was to move me to such freedom of
Discourse as might serve to disburthen my own Mind, and furnish him to
administer Comfort to me as far as was in his Power; assure'd me, that whatever I
said to him should remain with him, and be as much a Secret as if it was known
only to God and myself; and that he desire'd to know nothing of me, but to
qualifie him to give proper Advice to me, and to pray to God for me.
    This honest friendly way of treating me, unlock'd all the Sluces of my
Passions: He broke into my very Soul by it; and I unravell'd all the Wickedness
of my Life to him: In a word, I gave him an Abridgment of this whole History; I
give him the Picture of my Conduct for 50 years in Miniature.
    I hid nothing from him, and he in return exhorted me to a sincere
Repentance, explain'd to me what he meant by Repentance, and then drew out such
a Scheme of infinite Mercy, proclaim'd from Heaven to Sinners of the greatest
Magnitude that he left me nothing to say, that look'd like despair or doubting
of being accepted, and in this Condition he left me the first Night.
    He visited me again the next Morning, and went on with his Method of
explaining the Terms of Divine Mercy, which according to him consisted of
nothing more Difficult, than that of being sincerely desirous of it, and willing
to accept it; only a sincere Regret for, and hatred of those things which
render'd me so just an Object of divine Vengeance: I am not able to repeat the
excellent Discourses of this extraordinary Man; all that I am able to do, is to
say, that he reviv'd my Heart, and brought me into such a Condition, that I
never knew any thing of in my Life before: I was cover'd with Shame and Tears
for things past, and yet had at the same time a secret surprising Joy at the
Prospect of being a true Penitent, and obtaining the Comfort of a Penitent, I
mean the hope of being forgiven; and so swift did Thoughts circulate, and so
high did the impressions they had made upon me run, that I thought I cou'd
freely have gone out that Minute to Execution, without any uneasiness at all,
casting my Soul entirely into the Arms of infinite Mercy as a Penitent.
    The good Gentleman was so mov'd, with a view of the influence, which he saw
these things had on me, that he blessed God he had come to visit me, and
resolve'd not to leave me till the last Moment.
    It was no less than 12 Days after our receiving Sentence, before any were
order'd for Execution, and then the Dead Warrant, as they call it, came down,
and I found my Name was among them; a terrible blow this was to my new
Resolutions, in deed my Heart sunk within me, and I swoon'd away twice, one
after another, but spoke not a word: The good Minister was sorely Afflicted for
me, and did what he could to comfort me with the same Arguments, and the same
moving Eloquence that he did before, and left me not that Evening so long as the
Prisonkeepers would suffer him to stay in the Prison, unless he wou'd be lock'd
up with me all Night, which he was not willing to be.
    I wonder'd much that I did not see him all the next Day, it being but the
Day before the time appointed for Execution; and I was greatly discourag'd, and
dejected, and indeed almost sunk for want of that Comfort, which he had so
often, and with such Success yielded me in his former Visits; I waited with
great impatience, and under the greatest oppressions of Spirits imaginable till
about four a-Clock; when he came to my Apartment, for I had obtain'd the Favour
by the help of Money, nothing being to be done in that Place without it, not to
be kept in the Condemn'd Hole, among the rest of the Prisoners, who were to die,
but to have a little dirty Chamber to my self.
    My Heart leap'd within me for Joy, when I heard his Voice at the Door, even
before I saw him; but let any one Judge what kind of Motion I found in my Soul,
when after having made a short excuse for his not coming, he show'd me that his
time had been employed on my Account; that he had obtained a favourable Report
from the Recorder in my Case, and in short that he had brought me a Reprieve.
    He us'd all the Caution that he was able in letting me know what it would
have been double Cruelty to have conceal'd; for as grief had overset me before,
so Joy overset me now, and I fell into a more dangerous Swooning than at first,
and it was not without Difficulty that I was recover'd at all.
    The good Man having made a very Christian Exhortation to me, not to let the
Joy of my Reprieve, put the Remembrance of my past Sorrow out of my Mind, and
told me, that he must leave me, to go and enter the Reprieve in the Books, and
show it to the Sheriffs, he stood up just before his going away, and in a very
earnest Manner pray'd to God for me, that my Repentance might be made Unfeign'd
and Sincere; and that my coming back as it were into Life again, might not be a
returning to the Follies of Life, which I had made such solemn Resolutions to
forsake; I joyn'd heartily in that Petition, and must needs say, I had deeper
Impressions upon my Mind all that Night, of the Mercy of God in sparing my Life;
and a greater Detestation of my Sins, from a Sense of that goodness than I had
in all my Sorrow before.
    This may be thought inconsistent in itself, and wide from the Business of
this Book; Particularly, I reflect that many of those who may be pleas'd and
diverted with the Relation of the wicked part of my Story, may not relish this,
which is really the best part of my Life, the most Advantageous to my self, and
the most instructive to others; such however will I hope allow me liberty to
make my Story complete: It would be a severe Satyr on such, to say they do not
relish the Repentance as much as they do the Crime; and they had rather the
History were a complete Tragedy, as it was very likely to have been.
    But I go on with my Relation, the next Morning there was a sad Scene indeed
in the Prison; the first thing I was saluted with in the Morning, was the
Tolling of the great Bell at St. Sepulchre's, which usher'd in the Day: As soon
as it began to Toll, a dismal groaning and crying was heard from the Condemn'd
Hole, where there lay six poor Souls, who were to be Executed that Day, some for
one Crime, some for another, and two for Murther.
    This was follow'd by a confuse'd Clamour in the House, among the several
Prisoners, expressing their awkward Sorrows for the poor Creatures that were to
die, but in a manner extremely differing one from another; some cried for them;
some Brutishly huzza'd, and wish'd them a good Journey; some damn'd and cursed
those that had brought them to it; many pitying them; and some few, but very few
praying for them.
    There was hardly room for so much Composure of Mind, as was require'd for me
to bless the merciful Providence that had as it were snatch'd me out of the Jaws
of this Destruction: I remained as it were Dumb and Silent, overcome with the
Sense of it, and not able to express what I had in my Heart; for the Passions on
such Occasions as these, are certainly so agitated as not to be able presently
to regulate their own Motions.
    All the while the poor condemn'd Creatures were preparing for Death, and the
Ordinary as they call him, was busy with them, disposing them to submit to their
Sentence: I say all this while I was seize'd with a fit of trembling, as much as
I cou'd have been, if I had been in the same Condition, as I was the Day before;
I was so violently agitated by this Surprising Fit, that I shook as if it had
been in an Ague; so that I could not speak or look, but like one Distracted: As
soon as they were all put into the Carts and gone, which however I had not
Courage enough to see, I say, as soon as they were gone, I fell into a fit of
crying involuntarily, as a meer Distemper, and yet so violent, and it held me so
long, that I knew not what Course to take, nor could I stop, or put a Checque to
it, no, not with all the Strength and Courage I had.
    This fit of crying held me near two Hours, and as I believe held me till
they were all out of the World, and then a most humble Penitent serious kind of
Joy succeeded; a real transport it was, or Passion of Thankfulness, and in this
I continue'd most part of the Day.
    In the Evening the Good Minister visited me again, and fell to his usual
good Discourses, he Congratulated my having a space yet allow'd me for
Repentance, whereas the State of those six poor Creatures was determin'd, and
they were now past the Offers of Salvation: he press'd me to retain the same
Sentiments of the things of Life, that I had when I had a View of Eternity; and
at the End of all, told me that I should not conclude that all was over, that a
Reprieve was not a Pardon, that he could not answer for the Effects of it;
however I had this Mercy, that I had more Time given me, and it was my Business
to improve that Time.
    This Discourse left a kind of Sadness on my Heart, as if I might expect the
Affair would have a tragical Issue still, which however he had no Certainty of,
yet I did not at that time question him about it, he having said he would do his
utmost to bring it to a good End, and that he hop'd he might, but he would not
have me be Secure; and the Consequence show'd that he had Reason for what he
said.
    It was about a Fortnight after this, that I had some just Apprehensions that
I should be included in the Dead Warrant at the ensuing Sessions; and it was not
without great Difficulty, and at last an humble Petition for Transportation,
that I avoided it; so ill was I beholding to Fame, and so prevailing was the
Report of being an old offender, tho' in that they did not do me strict Justice,
for I was not in the Sense of the Law an old Offender, whatever I was in the Eye
of the Judge; for I had never been before them in a judicial way before, so the
Judges could not charge me with being an old Offender, but the Recorder was
pleas'd to represent my Case as he thought fit.
    I had now a Certainty of Life indeed, but with the hard Conditions of being
order'd for Transportation, which was, I say, a hard Condition in it self, but
not when comparatively consider'd; and therefore I shall make no Comments upon
the Sentence, nor upon the Choice I was put to; we all shall choose any thing
rather than Death, especially when 'tis attended with an uncomfortable Prospect
beyond it, which was my Case.
    The good Minister, whose Interest, tho' a Stranger to me, had obtain'd me
the reprieve, mourn'd sincerely for his part; he was in Hopes, he said, that I
should have ended my Days under the Influence of good Instruction, that I might
not have forgot my former Distresses, and that I should not have been turn'd
loose again among such a wretched Crew as are thus sent Abroad, where, he said,
I must have more than ordinary secret Assistance from the Grace of God, if I did
not turn as wicked again as ever.
    I have not for a good while mention'd my Governess, who had been dangerously
Sick, and being in as near a View of Death, by her Disease, as I was by my
Sentence, was a very great Penitent; I say, I have not mention'd her, nor indeed
did I see her in all this Time, but being now recovering, and just able to come
Abroad, she came to see me.
    I told her my Condition, and what a different flux and reflux of Fears, and
Hopes I had been agitated with; I told her, what I had escape'd, and upon what
Terms; and she was present, when the Minister express'd his Fears of my
relapsing again into wickedness upon my falling into the wretch'd Company, that
are generally transported: Indeed I had a melancholy Reflection upon it in my
own Mind, for I knew what a dreadful Gang was always sent a way together, and
said to my Governess, that the good Minister's Fears were not without Cause;
Well, well, says she, but I hope you will not be tempted with such a horrid
Example as that, and as soon as the Minister was gone, she told me, she would
not have me Discourag'd, for perhaps Ways and Means might be found, to dispose
of me in a particular Way, by my self, of which she would talk farther with me
afterwards.
    I look'd earnestly at her, and thought she look'd more cheerful than she
usually had done, and I entertain'd immediately a thousand Notions of being
deliver'd, but could not for my Life imagine the Methods, or think of one that
was feizible; but I was too much concern'd in it, to let her go from me without
explaining herself, which tho' she was very loath to do, yet, as I was still
pressing, she answer'd me in a few Words, thus, Why, you have Money, have you
not? Did you ever know one in your Life that was transported, and had a hundred
Pound in his Pocket, I'll warrant ye Child, says she.
    I understood her presently, but told her I saw no Room to hope for any
thing, but a strict Execution of the Order, and as it was a Severity that was
esteem'd a Mercy, there was no Doubt but it would be strictly observe'd; she said
no more but this, we will try what can be done, and so we parted.
    I lay in the Prison near fifteen Weeks after this; what the Reason of it
was, I know not, but at the End of this Time I was put on Board of a Ship in the
Thames, and with me a Gang of Thirteen, as harden'd vile Creatures as ever
Newgate produc'd in my Time; and it would really well take up a History longer
than mine to describe the Degrees of Impudence, and audacious Villany that those
Thirteen were arrive'd to, and the manner of their behaviour in the Voyage; of
which I have a very diverting Account by me, which the Captain of the Ship, who
carry'd them over, gave me, and which he caus'd his Mate to Write down at large.
    It may perhaps be thought trifling to enter here into a Relation of all the
little Incidents which attended me in this Interval of my Circumstances; I mean,
between the final Order for my Transportation, and the Time of going on Board
the Ship, and I am too near the End of my Story to allow Room for it, but
something relating to me and my Lancashire Husband, I must not omit.
    He had, as I have observe'd already, been carry'd from the Master's Side of
the ordinary Prison into the Press-Yard, with three of his Comrades, for they
found another to add to them after some Time; here, for what Reason I knew not,
they were kept without being brought to a Tryal almost three Months, it seems
they found Means to Bribe or Buy off some who were to come in against them, and
they wanted Evidence to convict them: After some puzzle on this Account, they
made shift to get Proof enough against two of them, to carry them off; but the
other two, of which my Lancashire Husband was one, lay still in Suspence: They
had I think one positive Evidence against each of them; but the Law obliging
them to have two Witnesses, they could make nothing of it; yet they were
resolve'd not to part with the Men neither, not doubting but Evidence would at
last come in; and in Order to this, I think Publication was made, that such
Prisoners were taken, and any one might come to the Prison and see them.
    I took this Opportunity to satisfy my Curiosity, pretending I had been
robb'd in the Dunstable Coach, and that I would go to see the two Highway Men;
but when I came into the Press-Yard, I so disguis'd my self, and muffled my Face
up so, that he could see little of me, and knew nothing of who I was, but when I
came back, I said publicly that I knew them very well.
    Immediately it was all over the Prison, that Moll Flanders would turn
Evidence against one of the Highway-Men, and that I was to come off by it from
the Sentence of Transportation.
    They heard of it, and immediately my Husband desire'd to see this Mrs.
Flanders that knew him so well, and was to be an Evidence against him,
andaccordingly, I had leave to go to him: I dress'd myself up as well as the
best clothes that I suffer'd myself ever to appear in there, would allow me, and
went to the Press-Yard, but had a Hood over my Face; he said little to me at
first, but ask'd me if I Knew him; I told him, yes, very well; but as I
conceal'd my Face, so I Counterfeited my Voice too, that he had no Guess at who
I was: He ask'd me where I had seen him, I told him between Dunstable and
Brickhill, but turning to the Keeper that stood by, I ask'd if I might not be
admitted to talk with him alone, he said, yes, yes, and so very civily withdrew.
    As soon as he was gone, and I had shut the Door, I threw off my Hood, and
bursting out into Tears, my Dear; said I, do you not know me? He turn'd pale and
stood Speechless, like one Thunder struck, and not able to conquer the Surprise,
said no more but this, let me sit down; and sitting down by the Table, leaning
his Head on his Hand, fix'd his Eyes on the Ground as one stupid: I cry'd so
vehemently on the other Hand, that it was a good while e'er I could speak any
more; but after I had given vent to my Passion, I repeated the same Words: MY
DEAR, Do you not know me? At which he answer'd, YES, and said no more a good
while.
    After some time continuing in the surprise, as above, he cast up his Eyes
towards me and said, How could you be so Cruel? I did not really understand what
he meant; and I answer'd, How can you call me Cruel? To come to me, says he, in
such a Place as this, is it not to insult me, I have not robb'd you, at least
not on the Highway.
    I perceive'd by this, that he knew nothing of the miserable Circumstances I
was in, and thought that having got Intelligence of his being there, I had come
to up braid him with his leaving me; but I had too much to say to him to be
affronted, and told him in a few Words, that I was far from coming to insult
him, but at best I came to Condole mutually; that he would be easily satisfy'd,
that I had no such View, when I should tell him that my Condition was worse than
his, and that many ways: He look'd a little concern'd at the Expression of my
Condition being worse than his; but with a kind of a smile, said, How can that
be? when you see me Fetter'd, and in Newgate, and two of my Companions Executed
already; can you say your Condition is worse than Mine?
    Come my Dear, says I, we have a long peice of Work to do, if I should be to
relate, or you to hear my unfortunate History; but if you will hear it, you will
soon conclude with me that my Condition is worse than yours: How is that
possible, says he, when I expect to be cast for my Life the very next Sessions?
Yes says I, 'tis very possible, when I shall tell you that I have been cast for
my Life three Sessions ago, and am now under Sentence of Death, is not my Case
worse than yours?
    Then indeed he stood silent again, like one struck Dumb, and after a little
while he starts up, unhappy Couple! says he, How can this be possible? I took
him by the Hand, come MY DEAR, said I, sit down, and let us compare our Sorrows:
I am a Prisoner in this very House, and in a much worse Circumstance than you,
and you will be satisfy'd I do not come to Insult you, when I tell you the
particulars; and with this we sat down together, and I told him so much of my
Story as I thought convenient, bringing it at last to my being reduce'd to great
Poverty, and representing myself as fallen into some Company that led me to
relieve my Distresses by a way that I had been utterly unacquainted with, and
that they making an attempt on a Tradesman's House I was seize'd upon, for having
been but just at the Door, the Maid-Servant pulling me in; that I neither had
broke any Lock, or taken any thing away, and that notwithstanding, that I was
brought in Guilty, and Sentenc'd to Die; but that the Judges having been made
sensible of the Hardship of my Circumstances, had obtain'd leave for me to be
transported.
    I told him I far'd the worse for being taken in the Prison for one Moll
Flanders, who was a famous successful Thief, that all of them had heard of, but
none of them had ever seen, but that as he knew was none of my Name; but I
plac'd all to the account of my ill Fortune, and that under this Name I was
dealt with as an old Offender, tho' this was the first thing they had ever known
of me: I gave him a long Account of what had befallen me, since I saw him; but
told him I had seen him since, he might think I had; then gave him an Account
how I had seen him at Brickhill; how he was pursued, and how by giving an
Account that I knew him, and that he was a very honest Gentleman, the Hue and
Cry was stopp'd, and the High Constable went back again.
    He listen'd most attentively to all my Story, and smile'd at the particulars,
being all of them infinitely below what he had been at the Head of; but when I
came to the Story of little Brickhill, he was Surprise'd, and was it you my Dear,
said he, that gave the Check to the Mob, at Brickhill. Yes said I, it was I
indeed, then I told him the particulars which I had observe'd of him there. Why
then said he, it was you that save'd my Life at that time, and I am glad I owe my
Life to you, for I will pay the Debt to you now, and I'll deliver you from the
present Condition you are in, or I will die in the attempt.
    I told him by no means; it was a Risque too great, not worth his running the
hazzard of, and for a Life not worth his saving; 'twas no matter for that, he
said, it was a Life worth all the World to him; a Life that had given him a new
Life; for, says he, I was never in real Danger, but that time; till the last
Minute when I was taken: Indeed his Danger then lay in his believing he had not
been pursue'd that way; for they had gone off from Hockley quite another way, and
had come over the enclos'd Country into Brickhill, and were sure they had not
been seen by any Body.
    Here he gave a long History of his Life, which indeed would make a very
strange History, and be infinitely diverting: He told me that he took the Road
about twelve Year before he marry'd me; that the Woman which call'd him Brother,
was not any Kin to him; but one that belong'd to their Gang, and who keeping
Correspondence with them, liv'd always in Town, having great Acquaintance, that
she gave them perfect Intelligence of Persons going out of Town, and that they
had made several good Booties by her Correspondence; that she thought she had
fix'd a Fortune for him, when she brought me to him, but happen'd to be
Disappointed, which he really could not blame her for: That, if I had had an
Estate, which she was inform'd I had, he had resolve'd to leave off the Road, and
live a new Life, but never to appear in Publick till some general Pardon had
been pass'd, or 'till he could, for Money, have got his Name into some
particular Pardon, so that he might have been perfectly easy, but that as it had
prov'd otherwise he was oblige'd to take up the old Trade again.
    He gave a long Account of some of his Adventures, and particularly one,
where he robb'd the West Chester Coaches, near Litchfield, when he got a very
great Booty; and after that, how he robb'd five Grasiers, in the West, going to
Burford Fair in Wiltshire to buy Sheep; he told me he got so much Money on those
two Occasions, that if he had known where to have found me, he would certainly
have embrace'd my Proposal of going with me to Virginia; or to have settled in a
Plantation, on some other of the English Colonies in America.
    He told me he wrote three Letters to me, directed according to my Order, but
heard nothing from me: This indeed I knew to be true, but the Letters coming to
my Hand in the Time of my latter Husband, I could do nothing in it, and
therefore gave no Answer, that so he might believe they had miscarried.
    Being thus disappointed, he said, he carry'd on the old Trade ever since,
tho' when he had gotten so much Money, he said, he did not run such desperate
Risques as he did before; then he gave me some Account of several hard and
desperate Encounters which he had with Gentlemen on the Road, who parted too
hardly with their Money; and show'd me some wounds he had receive'd, and he had
one or two very terrible Wounds indeed, particularly one by a Pistol Bullet
which broke his Arm; and another with a Sword which run him quite thro' the
Body, but that missing his Vitals he was cur'd again; one of his Comrades having
kept with him so faithfully, and so friendly, as that he assisted him in riding
near 80 Miles before his Arm was Set, and then got a Surgeon in a considerable
City, remote from the Place where it was done, pretending they were Gentlemen
travelling towards Carlisle, that they had been attack'd on the Road by
Highway-Men, and that one of them had shot him into the Arm.
    This, he said, his friend manage'd so well, that they were not suspected, but
lay still 'till he was cur'd: He gave me also so many distinct Accounts of his
Adventures, that it is with great Reluctance, that I decline the relating them:
but this is my own Story, not his.
    I then enquire'd into the Circumstances of his present Case, and what it was
he expected when he came to be try'd; he told me, that they had no Evidence
against him, for that of the three Rob beries, which they were all Charg'd with,
it was his good Fortune, that he was but in one of them, and that there was but
one Witness to be had to that Fact, which was not sufficient; but that it was
expected some others would come in, and that he thought when he first see me, I
had been one that came of that Errand; but that if no Body came in against him,
he hop'd he should be clear'd; that he had some intimation, that if he would
submit to Transport himself, he might be admitted to it without a Tryal, but
that he could not think of it with any Temper, and thought he could much easier
submit to be Hang'd.
    I blam'd him for that; first, because if he was Transported, there might be
an Hundred ways for him that was a Gentleman, and a bold enterprising Man to
find his way back again, and perhaps some Ways and Means to come back before he
went: He smile'd at that Part, and said he should like the last the best of the
two, for he had a kind of Horror upon his Mind at his being sent to the
Plantations as the Romans sent Slaves to Work in the Mines; that he thought the
Passage into another State, much more tolerable at the Gallows, and that this
was the general Notion of all the Gentlemen, who were driven by the Exigence of
their Fortunes to take the Road; that at the Place of Execution there was at
least an End of all the Miseries of the present State, and as for what was to
follow, a Man was in his Opinion, as likely to Repent sincerely in the last
Fortnight of his Life under the Agonies of a Goal, and the condemn'd Hole, as he
would ever be in the Woods and Wildernesses of America; that Servitude and hard
Labour were Things Gentlemen could never stoop to, that it was but the way to
force them to be their own Executioners, which was much worse, and that he could
not have any Patience when he did but think of it.
    I used the utmost of my endeavour to persuade him, and joyn'd that known
Woman's Rhetorick to it, I mean that of Tears: I told him the Infamy of a
public Execution, was certainly a greater pressure upon the Spirits of a
Gentleman, than any Mortifications that he could meet with Abroad; that he had
at least in the other, a Chance for his Life, whereas here, he had none at all;
that it was the easiest thing in the World for him to manage the Captain of a
Ship, who were generally speaking, Men of good Humour, and a small matter of
Conduct, especially, if there was any Money to be had, would make way for him to
buy himself off, when he came to Virginia.
    He look'd wishfully at me, and I guess'd he meant, that he had no Money, but
I was mistaken, his meaning was another way; you hinted just now, my Dear said
he, that there might be a way of coming back before I went, by which I
understood you, that it might be possible to buy it off here; I had rather give
200 l. to prevent going, than 100 l. to be set at Liberty when I came there.
That is my Dear said I, because you do not know the Place so well as I do: That
may be, said he, and yet I believe as well as you know it, you would do the
same, unless it is because, as you told me, you have a Mother there.
    I told him, as to my Mother, she must be dead many Years before; and as for
any other Relations that I might have there, I knew them not: That since my
Misfortunes had reduce'd me to the Condition I had been in for some Years, I had
not kept up any Correspondence with them; and that he would easily believe, I
should find but a cold Reception from them, if I should be put to make my first
visit in the Condition of a Transported Felon; that therefore if I went thither,
I resolved not to see them; but that I had many Views in going there, which took
off all the uneasy Part of it; and if he found himself oblige'd to go also, I
should easily Instruct him how to manage himself, so as never to go a Servant at
all, especially since I found he was not destitute of Money, which was the only
Friend in such a Condition.
    He smile'd, and said he did not tell me he had Money; I took him up short,
and told him I hop'd he did not understand by my speaking, that I should expect
any supply from him if he had Money; that on the other Hand, tho' I had not a
great deal, yet I did not want, and while I had any I would rather add to him,
than weaken him, seeing whatever he had, I knew in the Case of Transportation he
would have Occasion of it all.
    He express'd himself in a most tender manner upon that Head; he told me what
Money he had was not a great deal, but that he would never hide any of it from
me if I wanted it; and assure'd me he did not speak with any such Apprehensions;
that he was only intent upon what I had hinted to him; that here he knew what to
do, but there he should be the most helpless Wretch alive.
    I told him he frighted himself with that which had no Terror in it; that if
he had Money, as I was glad to hear he had, he might not only avoid the
Servitude, suppose'd to be the Consequence of Transportation; but begin the World
upon such a new Foundation, as he cou'd not fail of Success in, with but the
common Application usual in such Cases; that he could not but call to Mind, I
had recommended it to him many Years before, and propos'd it for restoring our
Fortunes in the World; and I would tell him now, that to convince him both of
the certainty of it, and of my being fully acquainted with the Method, and also
fully satisfy'd in the probability of Success, he should first see me deliver
myself from the Necessity of going over at all, and then that I would go with
him freely, and of my own Choice, and perhaps carry enough with me to satisfy
him; that I did not offer it, for want of being able to live without Assistance
from him; but that I thought our mutual Misfortunes had been such, as were
sufficient to Reconcile us both to quitting this part of the World, and living
where no Body could upbraid us with what was past, and without the Agonies of a
condemn'd Hole to drive us to it, where we should look back on all our past
Disasters with infinite Satisfaction, when we should consider that our Enemies
should entirely forget us, and that we should live as new People in a new World,
no Body having any thing to say to us, or we to them.
    I press'd this Home to him with so many Arguments, and answer'd all his own
passionate Objections so effectually, that he embrace'd me, and told me, I
treated him with such a Sincerity, as overcame him; that he would take my
Advice, and would strive to submit to his Fate, in hope of having the Comfort of
so faithful a Counsellor, and such a Companion in his Misery; but still he put
me in mind of what I had mention'd before; Namely, that there might be some way
to get off, before he went, and that it might be possible to avoid going at all,
which he said would be much better: I told him he should see, and be fully
satisfy'd that I would do my utmost in that Part too, and if it did not succeed,
yet that I would make good the rest.
    We parted after this long Conference, with such Testimonies of Kindness and
Affection as I thought were Equal, if not Superior to that at our parting at
Dunstable; and now I saw more plainly the Reason why he then decline'd coming
with me toward London; and why when we parted there, he told me it was not
convenient for him to come to London with me, as he would otherwise have done: I
have observe'd that the Account of his Life, would have made a much more pleasing
History than this of mine; and indeed nothing in it, was more strange than this
Part (viz.) that he carried on that desperate Trade full five and Twenty Year,
and had never been taken, the Success he had met with, had been so very
uncommon, and such, that sometimes he had liv'd handsomely and retire'd, in one
Place for a Year or two at a time, keeping himself and a Man Servant to wait on
him, and has often sat in the Coffee-Houses, and heard the very People who he
had robb'd give Accounts of their being robb'd, and of the Places and
Circumstances, so that he cou'd easily remember that it was the same.
    In this manner it seems he liv'd near Liverpool at the time, he unluckily
married me for a Fortune: Had I been the Fortune he expected, I verily believe,
he would have taken up and liv'd honestly.
    He had with the rest of his Misfortunes the good luck not to be actually
upon the spot, when the Robbery was done, which they were committed for; and so
none of the Persons robb'd cou'd swear to him; but it seems as he was taken,
with the Gang, one hard-mouth'd Country Man swore home to him; and according to
the Publication they had made, they expected more Evidence against him, and for
that Reason he was kept in hold.
    However, the offer which was made to him of Transportation, was made, as I
understood upon the intercession of some great Person who press'd him hard to
accept of it; and as he knew there were several that might come in against him,
I thought his Friend was in the Right, and I lay at him Night and Day to delay
it no longer.
    At last, with much difficulty he gave his consent, and as he was not
therefore admitted to Transportation in Court, and on his Petition as I was, so
he found himself under a difficulty to avoid embarking himself as I had said he
might have done; his Friend having given Security for him that he should
Transport himself, and not return within the Term.
    This hardship broke all my Measures, for the steps I took afterwards for my
own deliverance, were hereby render'd wholly ineffectual, unless I would abandon
him, and leave him to go to America by himself; than which he protested he would
much rather go directly to the Gallows.
    I must now return to my own Case, the time of my being Transported was near
at Hand; my Governess who continue'd my fast Friend, had try'd to obtain a
Pardon, but it could not be done unless with an Expense too heavy for my Purse,
considering that to be left empty, unless I had resolve'd to return to my old
Trade, had been worse than Transportation, because there I could live, here I
could not. The good Minister stood very hard on another Account to prevent my
being Transported also; but he was answer'd, that my Life had been given me at
his first Solicitations, and therefore he ought to ask no more; he was sensibly
grieve'd at my going, because, as he said, he fear'd I should lose the good
impressions, which a prospect of Death had at first made on me, and which were
since encreas'd by his Instructions; and the pious Gentleman was exceedingly
concern'd on that Account.
    On the other Hand, I was not so sollicitous about it now, but I conceal'd my
Reasons for it from the Minister, and to the last he did not know, but that I
went with the utmost reluctance and affliction.
    It was in the Month of February that I was with thirteen other Convicts,
deliver'd to a Merchant that Traded to Virginia, on board a Ship, riding in
Deptford Reach: The Officer of the Prison deliver'd us on board, and the Master
of the Vessel gave a Discharge for us.
    We were for that Night clapped under Hatches, and kept so close, that I
thought I should have been suffocated for want of Air, and the next Morning the
Ship weigh'd, and fell down the River to a Place call'd Bugby's Hole, which was
done, as they told us, by the agreement of the Merchant, that all Opportunity of
Escape should be taken from us: However when the Ship came thither, and cast
Anchor, we were permitted to come upon the Deck, but not upon the Quarter-Deck,
that being kept particularly for the Captain, and for Passengers.
    When by the Noise of the Men over my Head, and the Motion of the Ship, I
perceive'd they were under Sail, I was at first greatly Surprise'd, fearing we
should go away, and that our Friends would not be admitted to see us; but I was
easy soon after, when I found they had come to an Anchor, and that we had Notice
given by some of the Men, that the next Morning we should have the Liberty to
come upon Deck, and to have our Friends come to see us.
    All that Night I lay upon the hard Deck, as the other Prisoners did, but we
had afterwards little Cabins allow'd for such as had any Bedding to lay in them;
and room to stow any Box or Trunk for clothes, and Linnen if we had it, (which
might well be put in) for some of them had neither Shirt or Shift, Linnen or
Woollen, but what was on their Backs, or one Farthing of Money to help
themselves; yet I did not find but they far'd well enough in the Ship,
especially the Women, who got Money of the Seamen for washing their clothes,
&amp; c., sufficient to purchase any thing they wanted.
    When the next Morning we had the Liberty to come upon Deck, I ask'd one of
the Officers, whether I might not be allow'd to send a Letter on Shore to let my
Friends know where we lay, and to get some necessary Things sent to me. This was
the Boatswain, a very civil courteous Man, who told me I should have any Liberty
that I desire'd, that he could allow me with Safety; I told him I desire'd no
other; and he answer'd, the Ship's Boat would go up to London next Tide, and he
would Order my Letter to be carry'd.
    Accordingly when the Boat went off, the Boatswain came and told me the Boat
was going off, that he went in it himself, and if my Letter was ready, he would
take Care of it; I had prepare'd Pen, Ink, and Paper before-hand, and had gotten
a Letter ready directed to my Governess, and enclos'd another to my fellow
Prisoner, which however I did not let her know was my Husband, not to the last;
in that to my Governess, I let her know where the Ship lay, and press'd her to
send me what Things she had got ready for me, for my Voyage.
    When I gave the Boatswain the Letter, I gave him a Shilling with it, which I
told him was for the Charge of a Porter, which I had entreated him to send with
the Letter, as soon as he came on Shore, that if possible I might have an Answer
brought back by the same Hand, that I might know what was become of my Things,
for, SIR, says I, if the Ship should go away before I have them, I am undone.
    I took care when I gave him the Shilling, to let him see I had a little
better Furniture about me, than the ordinary Prisoners, that I had a Purse, and
in it a pretty deal of Money, and I found that the very Sight of it, immediately
furnish'd me with very different Treatment from what I should otherwise have met
with; for tho' he was Courteous indeed before, in a kind of natural Compassion
to me, as a Woman in distress; yet he was more than ordinarily so, afterwards,
and procur'd me to be better treated in the Ship, than, I say, I might otherwise
have been; as shall appear in its Place.
    He very honestly deliver'd my Letter, to my Governess own Hands, and brought
me back her Answer; and when he gave it me, gave me the Shilling again, there,
says he, there's your Shilling again too, for I deliver'd the Letter my self; I
could not tell what to say, I was so Surprise'd at the thing; but after some
Pause, I said, Sir, you are too kind, it had been but reasonable that you had
paid yourself Coach Hire then.
    No, no, says he, I am over paid: What is that Gentlewoman, is she your
Sister?
    No, Sir, said I, she is no Relation to me, but she is a dear Friend, and all
the Friends I have in the World: Well, says he, there are few such Friends: Why,
she crys after you like a Child; Ay, says I again, she would give a Hundred
Pound, I believe, to deliver me from this dreadful Condition.
    Would she so? says he: for half the Money, I believe, I could put you in a
way how to deliver your self, but this he spoke softly that no Body could hear.
    Alas! Sir, said I, but then that must be such a Deliverance as if I should
be taken again, would cost me my Life: Nay, said he, if you were once out of the
Ship, you must look to yourself afterwards; that I can say nothing to; so we
drop'd the Discourse for that Time.
    In the mean time, my Governess faithful to the last Moment, convey'd my
Letter to the Prison to my Husband, and got an Answer to it, and the next Day
came down herself, bringing me in the first Place, a Sea Bed, as they call it,
and all its ordinary Furniture; she brought me also a Sea Chest, that is, a
Chest, such as are made for Seamen, with all the Conveniences in it, and fill'd
with every thing almost that I could want; and in one of the Corners of the
Chest, where there was a private Drawer, was my Bank of Money, that is to say,
so much of it as I had resolve'd to carry with me; for I order'd part of my Stock
to be left behind, to be sent afterwards in such Goods as I should want when I
came to settle; for Money in that Country is not of much Use where all things
are bought for Tobacco, much more is it a great Loss to carry it from Hence.
    But my Case was particular; it was by no Means proper for me to go without
Money or Goods, and for a poor Convict that was to be sold as soon as I came on
Shore, to carry a Cargo of Goods would be to have Notice taken of it, and
perhaps to have them seize'd; so I took part of my Stock with me thus, and left
the rest with my Governess.
    My Governess brought me a great many other things, but it was not proper for
me to appear too Well, at least, till I knew what kind of a Captain we should
have: When she came into the Ship, I thought she would have died indeed; her
Heart sunk at the Sight of me, and at the Thoughts of parting with me in that
Condition, and she cry'd so intolerably, I could not for a long time have any
talk with her.
    I took that time to read my fellow Prisoner's Letter, which greatly
perplex'd me; he told me it would be impossible for him to be discharg'd time
enough for going in the same Ship, and which was more than all, he began to
question whether they would give him leave to go in what Ship he pleas'd, tho'
he did voluntarily transport himself; but that they would see him put on Board
such a Ship as they should direct, and that he would be charge'd upon the Captain
as other convict Prisoners were; so that he began to be in Dispair of seeing me
'till he came to Virginia, which made him almost desperate; seeing that on the
other Hand, if I should not be there, if any Accident of the Sea, or of
Mortality should take me away, he should be the most undone Creature in the
World.
    This was very perplexing, and I knew not what Course to take; I told my
Governess the Story of the Boatswain, and she was mighty eager with me to treat
with him; but I had no mind to it, till I heard whether my Husband or fellow
Prisoner, so she call'd him, could be at liberty to go with me or no; at last I
was force'd to let her into the whole matter, except only, that of his being my
Husband; I told her that I had made a positive Agreement with him to go, if he
could get the liberty of going in the same Ship, and I found he had Money.
    Then I told her what I propos'd to do when we came there, how we could
Plant, Settle; and in short, grow Rich without any more Adventures, and as a
great Secret, I told her we were to Marry as soon as he came on Board.
    She soon agreed cheerfully to my going, when she heard this, and she made it
her business from that time to get him deliver'd in time, so that he might go in
the same Ship with me, which at last was brought to pass, tho' with great
difficulty, and not without all the Forms of a Transported Convict, which he
really was not, for he had not been try'd, and which was a great Mortification
to him: As our Fate was now determin'd, and we were both on Board, actually
bound to Virginia, in the despicable Quality of Transported Convicts, destin'd
to be sold for Slaves, I for five Year, and he under Bonds and Security not to
return to England any more, as long as he liv'd; he was very much dejected and
cast down; the Mortification of being brought on Board as he was, like a
Prisoner, piqu'd him very much, since it was first told him he should Transport
himself, so that he might go as a Gentleman at liberty; it is true he was not
order'd to be sold when he came there, as we were, and for that Reason he was
oblige'd to pay for his Passage to the Captain, which we were not; as to the
rest, he was as much at a loss as a Child what to do with himself, but by
Directions.
    However, I lay in an uncertain Condition full three Weeks not knowing
whether I should have my Husband with me or no; and therefore not resolve'd how,
or in what manner to receive the honest Boatswain's Proposal, which indeed he
thought a little strange.
    At the End of this time, behold my Husband came on Board; he look'd with a
dejected angry Countenance, his great Heart was swell'd with Rage and Disdain;
to be drag'd along with three Keepers of Newgate, and put on Board like a
Convict, when he had not so much as been brought to a Tryal; he made loud
complaints of it by his Friends, for it seems he had some Interest; but they got
some Checque in their Application, and were told he had had Favour enough, and
that they had receive'd such an Account of him since the last Grant of his
Transportation, that he ought to think himself very well treated, that he was
not prosecuted anew: This answer quieted him, for he knew too much what might
have happen'd, and what he had room to expect; and now he saw the goodness of
that Advice to him, which prevail'd with him to accept of the offer of
Transportation, and after his chagrin at these Hell Hounds, as he call'd them,
was a little over, he look'd more compos'd, began to be cheerful, and as I was
telling him how glad I was to have him once more out of their Hands, he took me
in his Arms, and acknowledge'd with great Tenderness, that I had given him the
best advice Possible: My Dear, says he, Thou hast twice save'd my Life, from
hence forward it shall be employ'd for you, and I'll always take your Advice.
    Our first business was to compare our Stock: He was very honest to me, and
told me his Stock was pretty good when he came into the Prison, but that living
there as he did like a Gentleman, and, which was much more, the making of
Friends, and soliciting his Case, had been very Expensive; and in a Word, all
his Stock left was a Hundred and Eight Pounds, which he had about him in Gold.
    I gave him an Account of my Stock as faithfully, that is to say what I had
taken with me; for I was resolve'd what ever should happen, to keep what I had
left in Reserve; that in Case I should die, what I had was enough to give him,
and what was left in my Governess Hands would be her own, which she had well
deserve'd of me indeed.
    My Stock which I had with me was two Hundred forty six Pounds some odd
Shillings; so that we had three Hundred fifty four Pound between us, but a worse
gotten Estate was never put together, to begin the World with.
    Our greatest Misfortune as to our Stock, was that it was in Money, an
unprofitable Cargoe to be carryed to the Plantations; I believe his was really
all he had left in the World, as he told me it was; But I who had between seven
and eight Hundred Pounds in Bank when this Disaster befell me, and who had one of
the faithfulest Friends in the World to manage it for me, considering she was a
Woman of no Principles, had still Three Hundred Pounds left in her Hand, which I
had reserve'd, as above; besides I had some very valuable things with me, as
particularly two gold Watches, some small Peices of Plate, and some Rings; all
stolen Goods; with this Fortune, and in the Sixty-first Year of my Age, I
launch'd out into a new World, as I may call it, in the Condition only of a poor
Convict, order'd to be Transported in respite from the Gallows; my clothes were
poor and mean, but not ragg'd or dirty, and none knew in the whole Ship that I
had any thing of value about me.
    However, as I had a great many very good clothes, and Linnen in abundance,
which I had order'd to be pack'd up in two great Boxes, I had them Shipp'd on
Board, not as my Goods, but as consign'd to my real Name in Virginia; and had
the Bills of Loading in my Pocket; and in these Boxes was my Plate and Watches,
and every thing of value, except my Money, which I kept by itself in a private
Drawer in my Chest, and which cou'd not be found, or open'd if found without
splitting the Chest to peices.
    The Ship began now to fill, several Passengers came on Board, who were
embark'd on no Criminal account, and these had Accommodations assign'd them in
the great Cabbin, and other Parts of the Ship, whereas we as Convicts were
thrust down below, I know not where; but when my Husband came on Board, I spoke
to the Boatswain, who had so early given me Hints of his Friendship; I told him
he had befriended me in many things, and I had not made any suitable Return to
him, and with that I put a Guinea into his Hand; I told him that my Husband was
now come on Board, that tho' we were under the present Misfortunes, yet we had
been Persons of a differing Character from the wretch'd Crew that we came with,
and desire'd to know whether the Captain might not be mov'd, to admit us to some
Conveniences in the Ship, for which we would make him what Satisfaction he
pleas'd, and that we would gratifie him for his Pains in procuring this for us.
He took the Guinea as I cou'd see with great Satisfaction, and assure'd me of his
assistance.
    Then he told us, he did not doubt but that the Captain, who was one of the
best humour'd Gentlemen in the World, would be easily brought to Accommodate us,
as well as we cou'd desire, and to make me easy, told me he would go up the
next Tide on purpose to speak to him about it: The next Morning happening to
sleep a little longer than ordinary, when I got up, and began to look Abroad, I
saw the Boatswain among the Men in his ordinary Business; I was a little
melancholy at seeing him there, and going forwards to speak to him, he saw me,
and came towards me, but not giving him time to speak first, I said smiling, I
doubt, Sir, you have forgot us, for I see you are very busy; he return'd
presently, come along with me, and you shall see, so he took me into the great
Cabbin, and there sat a good sort of a Gentlemanly Man writing, and a great many
Papers before him.
    Here, says the Boatswain to him that was a writing, is the Gentlewoman that
the Captain spoke to you of; and turning to me, he said, I have been so far from
forgetting your Business, that I have been up at the Captain's House, and have
represented faithfully what you said, of your being furnish'd with Conveniences
for your self, and your Husband; and the Captain has sent this Gentleman, who is
Mate of the Ship, down on purpose to show you every thing, and to Accommodate
you to your Content, and bid me assure you, that you shall not be treated like
what you were expected to be, but with the same Respect as other Passengers are
treated.
    The Mate then spoke to me, and not giving me time to thank the Boatswain for
his Kindness, confirm'd what the Boatswain had said, and added, that it was the
Captain's Delight to show himself kind, and charitable, especially, to those
that were under any Misfortunes, and with that he show'd me several Cabbins
built up, some in the great Cabbin, and some partition'd off, out of the
Steerage, but opening into the great Cabbin, on purpose for Passengers, and gave
me Leave to choose where I would; I chose a Cabbin in the Steerage, in which
were very good Conveniences to set our Chest, and Boxes, and aTableto eat on.
    The Mate then told me, that the Boatswain had given so good a Character of
me, and of my Husband, that he had Orders to tell me, we should eat with him, if
we thought fit, during the whole Voyage on the common Terms of Passengers; that
we might lay in some fresh Provisions if we pleas'd; or if not, he should lay in
his usual Store, and that we should have Share with him: This was very reviving
News to me, after so many Hardships, and Afflictions; I thank'd him, and told
him, the Captain should make his own Terms with us, and ask'd him Leave to go
and tell my Husband of it, who was not very well, and was not yet out of his
Cabbin: Accordingly I went, and my Husband whose Spirits were still so much sunk
with the Indignity (as he understood it) offer'd him, that he was scarce yet
himself, was so reviv'd with the Account I gave him of the Reception we were
like to have in the Ship, that he was quite another Man, and new Vigour and
Courage appear'd in his very Countenance; so true is it, that the greatest
Spirits, when over whelm'd by their Afflictions, are subject to the greatest
Dejections.
    After some little Pause to recover himself, my Husband came up with me, and
gave the Mate Thanks for the Kindness which he had express'd to us, and sent
suitable Acknowledgments by him to the Captain, offering to Pay him by Advance,
whatever he demanded for our Passage, and for the Conveniencies he had help'd us
to; the Mate told him that the Captain would be on Board in the Afternoon, and
that he would leave all that to him; accordingly in the Afternoon, the Captain
came, and we found him the same courteous obliging Man, that the Boatswain had
represented him; and he was so well pleas'd with my Husband's Conversation, that
in short, he would not let us keep the Cabbin we had chosen, but gave us one
that, as I said before, open'd into the great Cabbin.
    Nor were his Conditions exorbitant, or the Man craving and eager to make a
Prey of us, but for fifteen Guineas we had our whole Passage and Provisions, eat
at the Captain's Table, and were very handsomely Entertain'd.
    The Captain lay himself in the other part of the Great Cabbin, having let
his round House, as they call it, to a rich Planter, who went over with his
Wife, and three Children, who eat by themselves; he had some other ordinary
Passengers, who Quarter'd in the Steerage; and as for our old Fraternity, they
were kept under the Hatches, and came very little on the Deck.
    I could not refrain acquainting my Governess with what had happen'd, it was
but just that she, who was really concern'd for me, should have part in my good
Fortune; besides I wanted her Assistance to supply me with several Necessaries,
which before I was shy of letting any Body see me have; but now I had a Cabbin
and room to set things in, I order'd abundance of good things for our Comfort in
the Voyage, as Brandy, Sugar, Lemons, &amp; c., to make Punch, and Treat our
Benefactor, the Captain; and abundance of things for eating and drinking; also a
larger Bed, and Bedding proportion'd to it; so that in a Word, we resolve'd to
want for nothing.
    All this while I had provided nothing for our Assistance, when we should
come to the Place, and begin to call ourselves Planters; and I was far from
being ignorant of what was needful on that Occasion; particularly all sorts of
Tools for the Planters-Work, and for building; and all kinds of House-Furniture,
which if to be bought in the Country, must necessarily cost double the Price.
    I discours'd that Point with my Governess, and she went and waited upon the
Captain, and told him, that she hop'd ways might be found out, for her two
unfortunate Cousins, as she call'd us, to obtain our Freedom when we came into
the Country, and so enter'd into a Discourse with him about the Means and Terms
also, of which I shall say more in its Place; and after thus sounding the
Captain, she let him know, tho' we were unhappy in the Circumstance that
occasion'd our going, yet that we were not unfurnish'd to set ourselves to Work
in the Country; and were resolve'd to settle, and live there as Planters: The
Captain readily offer'd his Assistance, told her the Method of entering upon
such Business, and how easy, nay, how certain it was for industrious People to
recover their Fortunes in such a manner: Madam, says he, 'tis no Reproach to any
Man in that Country to have been sent over in worse Circumstances than I
perceive your Cousins are in, provided they do but apply with good judgement to
the Business of the Place when they come there.
    She then enquire'd of him what things it was Necessary we should carry over
with us, and he like a knowing Man, told her thus: Madam, your Cousins first
must procure some Body to buy them as Servants, in Conformity to the Conditions
of their Transportation, and then in the Name of that Person, they may go about
what they will; they may either Purchase some Plantations already begun, or they
may purchase Land of the Government of the Country, and begin where they please,
and both will be done reasonably; she bespoke his Favour in the first Article,
which he promise'd to her to take upon himself, and indeed faithful[ly] perform'd
it; and as to the rest, he promise'd to recommend us to such as should give us
the best Advice, and not to impose upon us, which was as much as could be
desire'd.
    She then ask'd him, if it would not be Necessary to furnish us with a Stock
of Tools and Materials for the Business of Planting, and he said, yes, by all
means; then she begg'd his Assistance in that, and told him she would furnish us
with everything that was Convenient whatever it cost her; he accordingly gave
her a List of things Necessary for a Planter, which by his Account came to about
fourscore, or an Hundred Pounds; and in short, she went about as dexterously to
buy them, as if she had been an old Virginia Merchant; only that she bought by
my Direction above twice as much of every Thing, as he had given her a List of.
    These she put on Board in her own Name, took his Bills of Loading for them,
and endors'd those Bills of Loading to my Husband, Ensuring the Cargo after
wards in her own Name; so that we were provided for all Events, and for all
Disasters.
    I should have told you that my Husband gave her all his own Stock of 108l.,
which as I have said, he had about him in Gold, to lay out thus, and I gave her
a good Sum besides; so that I did not break into the Stock, which I had left in
her Hands at all, but after all we had near 200l. in Money, which was more than
enough for our purpose.
    In this Condition very cheerful, and indeed joyful at being so happily
accommodated, we set Sail from Bugby's Hole to Gravesend, where the Ship lay
about ten Days more, and where the Captain came on Board for good and all. Here
the Captain offer'd us a Civility, which indeed we had no Reason to expect,
Namely, tolet us go on Shore, and refresh our selves, upon giving our Words,
that we would not go from him, and that we would return peaceably on Board
again: This was such an Evidence of his Confidence in us, that it over come my
Husband, who in a meer Principle of Gratitude, told him as he could not be in
any Capacity to make a suitable Return for such a Favour, so he could not think
of accepting it, nor could he be easy that the Captain should'd run such a Risque:
After some mutual Civilities, I gave my Husband a Purse, in which was 80
Guineas, and he put it into the Captains Hand: There Captain, says he, there's
part of a Pledge for our Fidelity; if we deal dishonestly with you on any
Account, 'tis your own; and on this we went on Shore.
    Indeed the Captain had Assurance enough of our Resolutions to go, for that
having made such Provision to Settle there, it did not seem Rational that we
would choose to remain here at the Peril of Life, for such it must have been: In
a Word, we went all on Shore with the Captain, and Supp'd together in Gravesend,
where we were very Merry, staid all Night, lay at the House where we Supp'd, and
came all very honestly on Board again with him in the Morning. Here we bought
ten Dozen of Bottles of good Beer, some Wine, some Fowles, and such Things as we
thought might be acceptable on Board.
    My Governess was with us all this while, and went round with us into the
Downs, as did also the Captain's Wife, with whom she went back; I was never so
sorrowful at parting with my own Mother as I was at parting with her, and I
never saw her more: We had a fair Easterly Wind the third Day after we came to
the Downs, and we sail'd from thence the 10th of April; nor did we touch any
more at any Place, till being driven on the Coast of Ireland by a very hard Gale
of Wind, the Ship came to an Anchor in a little Bay, near a River, whose Name I
remember not, but they said the River came down from Limerick, and that it was
the largest River in Ireland.
    Here being detain'd by bad Weather for some time, the Captain who continue'd
the same kind good humour'd Man as at first, took us two on Shore with him
again: He did it now in kindness to my Husband indeed, who bore the Sea very
ill, especially when it blew so hard: Here we bought again, store of fresh
Provisions, Beef, Pork, Mutton, and Fowls, and the Captain stay'd to Pickle up
five or six Barrels of Beef to lengthen out the Ships Store: We were here not
above five Days, when the Weather turning mild, and a fair Wind; we set Sail
again and in two and Forty Days came safe to the Coast of Virginia.
    When we drew near to the Shore, the Captain call'd me to him, and told me
that he found by my Discourse, I had some Relations in the Place, and that I had
been there before, and so he suppose'd I understood the Custom, in their
disposing the convict Prisoners when they arrive'd; I told him I did not, and
that as to what Relations I had in the Place, he might be sure I would make
myself known to none of them while in the Circumstances of a Prisoner, and that
as to the rest, we left ourselves entirely to him to assist us, as he was
pleas'd to promise us he wou'd do. He told me I must get some Body in the Place
to come and buy me as a Servant, and who must answer for me to the Governor of
the Country, if he demanded me; I told him we should do as he should direct; so
he brought a Planter to treat with him, as it were for the Purchase of me for a
Servant, my Husband not being order'd to be Sold, and there I was formally sold
to him, and went a Shore with him: The Captain went with us, and carried us to a
certain House whether it was to be call'd a Tavern or not, I know not, but we
had a Bowl of Punch there made of Rum, &amp;c. and were very Merry. After some
time the Planter gave us a Certificate of Discharge, and an Acknowledgment of
having serve'd him faithfully, and I was free from him the next Morning, to go
whether I would.
    For this Peice of Service the Captain demanded of me 6000 weight of Tobacco,
which he said he was Accountable for to his Freighter, and we bought for him,
and made him a present of 20 Guineas besides; which he was abundantly satisfy'd
with.
    It is not proper to Enter here into the particulars of what Part of the
Colony of Virginia we Settled in, for divers Reasons; it may suffice to mention
that we went into the Great River of Potomack, the Ship being bound thither; and
there we intended to have Settled at first, tho' afterwards we altered our
Minds.
    The first thing I did of Moment after having gotten all our Goods on Shore,
and plac'd them in a Store-house, which with a Lodging we hir'd at the small
Place or Village, where we Landed; I say the first thing was to enquire after my
Mother, and after my Brother, (that fatal Person who I married as a Husband, as
I have related at large); a little enquiry furnish'd me with Information that
Mrs. --, that is my Mother was Dead; that my Brother, (or Husband) was alive,
and which was worse, I found he was remove'd from the Plantation where I liv'd,
and liv'd with one of his Sons in a Plantation just by the Place where we
Landed, and had hir'd a Warehouse.
    I was a little Surprise'd at first, but as I venture'd to satisfy myself, that
he could not know me, I was not only perfectly easy, but had a great mind to see
him if it was possible, without his seeing me; in order to that I found out by
enquiry the Plantation where he liv'd, and with a Woman of the Place, who I got
to help me, like what we call a Chairwoman, I rambl'd about towards the Place,
as if I had only a mind to see the Country, and look about me; at last I came so
near that I saw the Dwelling-house: I ask'd the Woman whose Plantation that was,
she said, it belong'd to such a Man, and looking out a little to our right
Hands, there says she, is the Gentleman that owns the Plantation, and his Father
with him: What are their Christian Names? said I. I know not said she, what the
old Gentleman's Name is, but his Sons Name is Humphry, and I believe, says she,
the Fathers is so too; you may guess, if you can, what a confuse'd mixture of Joy
and Fright possest my Thoughts upon this Occasion, for I immediately knew that
this was no Body else, but my own Son, by that Father she showed me, who was my
own Brother: I had no Mask, but I ruffled my Hoods so about my Face, that I
depended upon it, that after above 20 Years absence, and withal not expecting
any thing of me in that part of the World, he would not be able to know me; but
I need not have us'd all that Caution, for he was grown dim Sighted, by some
Distemper, which had fallen upon his Eyes, and could but just see well enough to
walk about, and not run against a Tree or into a Ditch: As they drew near to us,
I said, does he know you, Mrs. Owen? so they call'd the Woman, yes, she said, if
he hears me speak, he will know me; but he can't see well enough to know me, or
any Body else; and so she told me the Story of his Sight, as I have related:
This made me secure, and so I threw open my Hoods again, and let them pass by
me; It was a wretch'd thing for a Mother thus to see her own Son, a handsome
comely young Gentleman in flourishing Circumstances, and durst not make herself
known to him; and durst not take any notice of him; let any Mother of Children
that reads this, consider it, and but think with what anguish of Mind I
restrain'd myself; what yearnings of Soul I had in me to embrace him, and weep
over him; and how I thought all my Entrails turn'd within me, that my very
Bowels mov'd, and I knew not what to do; as I now know not how to express those
Agonies: When he went from me I stood gazing and trembling, and looking after
him as long as I could see him; then sitting down on the Grass, just at a Place
I had mark'd, I made as if I lay down to rest me, but turn'd from her, and lying
on my Face wept, and kiss'd the Ground that he had set his Foot on.
    I cou'd not conceal my Disorder so much from the Woman, but that she
perceive'd it, and thought I was not well, which I wasoblig'd to pretend was
true; upon which she press'd me to rise, the Ground being damp and dangerous,
which I did, and walk'd away.
    As I was going back again, and still Talking of this Gentleman, and his Son,
a new Occasion of melancholy offer'd itself thus: The Woman began, as if she
would tell me a Story to divert me; there goes, says she, a very odd Tale among
the Neighbours where this Gentleman formerly liv'd: What was that, said I? why,
says she, that old Gentleman going to England, when he was a young Man, fell in
Love with a young Lady there, one of the finest Women that ever was seen here,
and Married her, and brought her over hither to his Mother, who was then living:
He liv'd here several Years with her, continue'd she, and had several Children by
her, of which the young Gentleman that was with him now, was one; but after some
time, the old Gentlewoman his Mother talking to her, of something relating to
herself, and of her Circumstances in England, which were bad enough; the
Daughter-in-Law began to be very much Surprise'd and uneasy, and in short, in
examining further into things, it appear'd past all Contradiction, that she (the
old Gentlewoman) was her own Mother, and that consequently, that Son was her own
Brother, which struck the Family with Horror, and put them into such Confusion,
that it had almost ruin'd them all; the young Woman would not live with him, he
for a time went Distracted, and at last, the young Woman went away for England,
and has never been heard of since.
    It is easy to believe that I was strangely affected with this Story; but
'tis impossible to describe the Nature of my Disturbance; I seem'd astonish'd at
the Story, and ask'd her a Thousand Questions about the particulars, which I
found she was thoroughly acquainted with; at last I began to enquire into the
Circumstances of the Family, how the old Gentlewoman, I mean, my Mother, died,
and how she left what she had; for my Mother had promise'd me very solemnly, that
when she died, she would do something for me, and leave it so, as that, if I was
Living, I should one way or other come at it, without its being in the Power of
her Son, my Brother and Husband to prevent it: She told me she did not know
exactly how it was order'd; but she had been told, that my Mother had left a Sum
of Money, and had tyed her Plantation for the Payment of it, to be made good to
the Daughter, if ever she could be heard of, either in England or elsewhere; and
that the Trust was left with this Son, who we saw with his Father.
    This was News too good for me to make light of, and you may be sure fill'd
my Heart with a Thousand Thoughts, what Course I should take, and in what manner
I should make myself known, or whether I should ever make myself known, or no.
    Here was a Perplexity that I had not indeed skill to manage myself in,
neither knew I what Course to take: It lay heavy upon my mind Night and Day, I
could neither Sleep or Converse, so that my Husband perceive'd it, wonder'd what
ail'd me, and strove to divert me, but it was all to no purpose; he press'd me
to tell him what it was troubled me, but I put it off, till at last importuning
me continually, I was force'd to form a Story, which yet had a plain Truth to lay
it upon too; I told him I was troubled because I found we must shift our
Quarters, and alter our Scheme of Settling, for that I found I should be known,
if I stay'd in that part of the Country; for that my Mother being dead, several
of my Relations were come into that Part where we then was, and that I must
either discover myself to them, which in our present Circumstances was not
proper on many Accounts, or remove, and which to do I knew not, and that this it
was that made me melancholy.
    He joyned with me in this, that it was by no means proper for me to make
myself known to any Body in the Circumstances, in which we then were; and
therefore he told me he would be willing to remove to any part of the Country,
or even to any other Country if I thought fit; but now I had another Difficulty,
which was, that if I remove'd to another Colony, I put myself out of the way of
ever making a due Search after those Things which my Mother had left: Again, I
could never so much as think of breaking the Secret of my former Marriage to my
new Husband; it was not a Story, would bear telling, nor could I tell what might
be the Consequences of it; it was impossible too, without making it public all
over the Country, as well who I was, as what I now was also.
    This Perplexity continue'd a great while, and made my Spouse very uneasy; for
he thought I was not open with him, and did not let him into every Part of my
Grievance; and he would often say, he wonder'd what he had done, that I would
not trust him, whatever it was, especially if it was grievous and afflicting;
the Truth is, he ought to have been trusted with every Thing, for no Man could
deserve better of a Wife; but this was a thing I knew not how to open to him,
and yet having no Body to disclose any Part of it to, the Burthen was too heavy
for my Mind; for let them say what they please of our Sex not being able to keep
a Secret; my Life is a plain Conviction to me of the Contrary; but be it our
Sex, or the Men's Sex, a Secret of Moment should always have a Confident, a
bosom Friend, to whom we may communicate the Joy of it, or the Grief of it, be
it which it will, or it will be a double Weight upon the Spirits, and perhaps
become even insupportable in it self; and this I appeal to Human Testimony for
the Truth of.
    And this is the Cause why many times Men, as well as Women, and Men of the
greatest, and best Qualities other ways, yet have found themselves weak in this
Part, and have not been able to bear the Weight of a secret Joy, or of a secret
Sorrow; but have been oblige'd to disclose it, even for the mere giving Vent to
themselves, and to unbend the Mind, opprest with the Weights which attended it;
nor was this any Token of Folly at all, but a natural Consequence of the Thing;
and such People had they struggl'd longer with the Oppression, would certainly
have told it in their Sleep, and disclos'd the Secret, let it have been of what
fatal Nature soever, without regard to the Person to whom it might be expos'd:
This Necessity of Nature, is a Thing which Works sometimes with such Vehemency,
in the Minds of those who are guilty of any atrocious Villany; such as a secret
Murther in particular, that they have been oblige'd to Discover it, tho' the
Consequence has been their own Destruction: Now, tho' it may be true that the
divine Justice ought to have the Glory of all those Discoveries and Confessions,
yet 'tis as certain that Providence which ordinarily Works by the Hands of
Nature, makes Use here, of the same natural Causes to produce those
extraordinary Effects.
    I could give several remarkable Instances of this in my long Conversation
with Crime, and with Criminals; I knew one Fellow, that while I was a Prisoner
in Newgate, was one of those they called then Night-fliers, I know not what Word
they may have understood it by since; but he was one, who by Connivance was
admitted to go Abroad every Evening, when he play'd his Pranks, and furnish'd
those honest People they call Thief-Catchers with Business to find out the next
Day, and restore for a Reward, what they had stolen the Evening before: This
Fellow was as sure to tell in his Sleep all that he had done, and every Step he
had taken, what he had stolen, and where, as sure as if he had engage'd to tell
it waking, and therefore he was oblige'd after he had been out to lock himself
up, or be locked up by some of the Keepers that had him in Fee, that no Body
should hear him; but on the other Hand, if he had told all the Particulars, and
given a full Account of his Rambles and Success to any Comrade, any Brother
Thief, or to his Employers, as I may justly call them, then all was well, and he
slept as quietly as other People.
    As the publishing this Account of my Life, is for the sake of the just Moral
of every Part of it, and for Instruction, Caution, Warning, and Improvement to
every Reader, so this will not pass I hope for an unnecessary Digression,
concerning some People, being oblige'd to disclose the greatest Secrets either of
their own, or other Peoples Affairs.
    Under the Oppression of this Weight, I labour'd in the Case I have been
Naming; and the only Relief I found for it, was to let my Husband into so much
of it, as I thought would convince him of the Necessity there was, for us to
think of Settling in some other Part of the World, and the next Consideration
before us was, which Part of the English Settlements we should go to? my Husband
was a perfect Stranger to the Country, and had not yet so much as a Geographical
Knowledge of the Situation of the several Places; and I, that till I wrote this,
did not know what the Word Geographical signify'd, had only a general Knowledge
from long Conversation with People that came from, or went to several Places;
but this I knew, that Maryland, Pensilvania, East and West Jersy, New York, and
New England, lay all North of Virginia, and that they were consequently all
colder Climates, to which, for that very reason, I had an Aversion; for that as
I naturaly love'd warm Weather, so now I grew into Years, I had a stronger
Inclination to shun a cold Climate; I therefore consider'd of going to Carolina,
which is the most Southern Colony of the English on the Continent; and hither I
propos'd to go, the rather, because I might with ease come from thence at any
time, when it might be proper to enquire after my Mother's Effects, and to
demand them.
    With this Resolution, I proposed to my Husband our going away from where we
was, and carrying our Effects with us to Carolina, where we resolve'd to Settle;
for my Husband readily agreed to the first Part (viz.) that it was not at all
proper to stay where we was, since I had assure'd him we should be known there,
and the rest I conceal'd from him.
    But now I found a new Difficulty upon me: The main Affair grew heavy upon my
Mind still, and I could not think of going out of the Country, without some how
or other making Enquiry into the grand Affair of what my Mother had done for me;
nor could I with any Patience bear the Thought of going away, and not make my
self known to my old Husband (Brother), or to my Child, his Son; only I would
fain have had it done without my new Husband having any knowledge of it, or they
having any Knowledge of him.
    I cast about innumerable Ways in my Thoughts how this might be done: I would
gladly have sent my Husband away to Carolina, and have come after my self; but
this was impracticable, he would not stir without me, being himself unacquainted
with the Country, and with the Methods of settling any where: Then I thought we
would both go first, and that when we were settled I should come back to
Virginia; but even then I knew he would never part with me, and be left there
alone; the Case was plain, he was bred a Gentleman, and was not only
unacquainted, but indolent, and when we did Settle, would much rather go into
the Woods with his Gun, which they call there Hunting, and which is the ordinary
Work of the Indians; I say he would much rather do that, than attend the natural
Business of the Plantation.
    There were therefore Difficulties unsurmountable, and such as I knew not
what to do in, I had such strong Impressions on my Mind about discovering my
self to my old Husband, that I could not withstand them; and the rather, because
it run in my Thoughts, that if I did not, while he liv'd, I might in vain
endeavour to convince my Son afterwards, that I was really the same Person, and
that I was his Mother, and so might both lose the Assistance and Comfort of the
Relation, and lose whatever it was my Mother had left me; and yet on the other
Hand, I could never think it proper to discover the Circumstances I was in; as
well relating to the having a Husband with me, as to my being brought over as a
Criminal; on both which Accounts it was absolutely Necessary to me to remove
from the Place where I was, and come again to him, as from another Place and in
another Figure.
    Upon those Considerations, I went on with telling my Husband, the absolute
necessity there was of our not Settling in Potomack River, that we should
presently be made Publick there, whereas if we went to any other Place in the
World, we could come in with as much Reputation, as any Family that came to
Plant: That as it was always agreeable to the Inhabitants to have Families come
among them to Plant, who brought Substance with them, so we should be sure of
agreeable Reception, and without any possibility of a Discovery of our
Circumstances.
    I told him too, that as I had several Relations in the Place where we was,
and that I durst not now let my self be known to them, because they would soon
come to know the Occasion of my coming over, which would be to expose my self to
the last Degree; so I had Reason to believe that my Mother who died here had
left me something, and perhaps considerable, which it might be very well worth
my while to enquire after; but that this too could not be done without exposing
us publicly, unless we went from hence; and then, where ever we settled, I
might come as it were to visit and to see my Brother and Nephews, make my self
known, enquire after what was my Due, be receive'd with Respect, and at the same
time have Justice done me; whereas if I did it now, I could expect nothing but
with Trouble, such as exacting it by Force, receiving it with Curses and
Reluctance, and with all kinds of Affronts; which he would not perhaps bear to
see: That in Case of being oblige'd to legal Proofs of being really her Daughter,
I might be at a Loss, be oblige'd to have Recourse to England, and it may be to
fail at last, and so lose it: With these Arguments, and having thus acquainted
my Husband with the whole Secret so far as was needful to him, we resolve'd to go
and seek a Settlement in some other Colony, and at first Carolina was the Place
pitch'd upon.
    In order to this we began to make enquiry for Vessels going to Carolina, and
in a very little while got information, that on the other side the Bay, as they
call it, namely, in Maryland, there was a Ship, which came from Carolina, loaden
with Rice, and other Goods, and was going back again thither: On this News we
hir'd a Sloop to take in our Goods, and taking as it were a final farewell of
Potowmack River, we went with all our Cargo over to Maryland.
    This was a long and unpleasant Voyage, and my Spouse said it was worse to
him than all the Voyage from England, because the Weather was bad, the Water
rough, and the Vessel small and inconvenient; in the next Place, we were full a
hundred Miles up Potowmack River, in a part they call Westmorland County; and as
that River is by far the greatest in Virginia, and I have heard say, it is the
greatest River in the World that falls into another River, and not directly into
the Sea; so we had base Weather in it, and were frequently in great Danger; for
tho' they call it but a River, 'tis frequently so broad, that when we were in
the middle, we could not see Land on either Side for many Leagues together: Then
we had the great Bay of Chesapeake to cross, which is where the River Potowmack
falls into it, near thirty Miles broad, so that our Voyage was full two hundred
Mile, in a poor sorry Sloop, with all our Treasure, and if any Accident had
happen'd to us, we might at last have been very miserable; supposing we had lost
our Goods and saved our Lives only, and had then been left naked and destitute,
and in a wild strange Place, not having one Friend or Acquaintance in all that
part of the World? The very thoughts of it gives me some horror, even since the
Danger is past.
    Well, we came to the Place in five Days sailing, I think they call it
Philip's Point, and behold when we came thither, the Ship bound to Carolina, was
loaded and gone away but three Days before. This was a Disappointment, but
however, I that was to be discourag'd with nothing, told my Husband, that since
we could not get Passage to Carolina, and that the Country we was in, was very
fertile and good; we would see if we could find out any thing for our Turn where
we was, and that if he lik'd things we would Settle here.
    We immediately went on Shore, but found no Conveniences just at that Place,
either for our being on Shore, or preserving our Goods on Shore, but was
directed by a very honest Quaker, who we found there, to go to a Place, about
sixty Miles East; that is to say, nearer the Mouth of the Bay, where he said he
liv'd and where we should be Accommodated, either to Plant, or to wait for any
other Place to Plant in, that might be more Convenient, and he invited us with
so much kindness that we agreed to go, and the Quaker himself went with us.
    Here we bought us two Servants, (viz.) an English Woman-Servant just come on
Shore from a Ship of Liverpool, and a Negro Man-Servant, things absolutely
necessary for all People that pretended to Settle in that Country: This honest
Quaker was very helpful to us, and when we came to the Place that he propos'd,
found us out a convenient Storehouse, for our Goods, and Lodging for ourselves,
and Servants; and about two Months, or thereabout afterwards, by his Direction,
we took up a large peice of Land from the Government of that Country, in order
to form our Plantation, and so we laid the thoughts of going to Carolina wholly
aside, having been very well receive'd here, and Accommodated with a convenient
Lodging, till we could prepare things, and have Land enough cur'd, and Materials
provided for building us a House, all which we manage'd by the Direction of the
Quaker; so that in one Years time we had near fifty Acres of Land clear'd, part
of it enclos'd, and some of it Planted with Tobacco, tho' not much; besides, we
had Garden ground and Corn sufficient to supply our Servants with Roots, and
Herbs, and Bread.
    And now I persuaded my Husband to let me go over the Bay again, and enquire
after my Friends; he was the willinger to consent to it now, because he had
business upon his Hands sufficient to employ him, besides his Gun to divert him,
which they call Hunting there, and which he greatly delighted in; and indeed we
us'd to look at one another, sometimes with a great deal of Pleasure, reflecting
how much better that was, not than Newgate only, but than the most prosperous of
our Circumstances in the wicked Trade we had been both carrying on.
    Our Affair was now in a very good posture, we purchased of the Proprietors
of the Colony, as much Land for 35 Pound, paid in ready Money, as would make a
sufficient Plantation to us as long as we could either of us live; and as for
Children I was past any thing of that kind.
    But our good Fortune did not End here, I went, as I have said, over the Bay,
to the Place, where my Brother, once a Husband liv'd; but I did not go to the
same Village, where I was before, but went up another great River, on the East
side of the River Potowmack, called Rapahannock River, and by this means came on
the back of his Plantation, which was large, and by the help of a Navigable
Creek, that run into the Rapahannock, I came very near it.
    I was now fully resolve'd to go up Point-blank to my Brother (Husband) and to
tell him who I was; but not knowing what Temper I might find him in, or how much
out of Temper rather, I might make him by such a rash visit, I resolve'd to write
a Letter to him first to let him know who I was, and that I was come not to give
him any trouble upon the old Relation, which I hop'd was entirely forgot; but
that I apply'd to him as a Sister to a Brother, desiring his Assistance in the
Case of that Provision, which our Mother at her decease had left for my Support,
and which I did not doubt but he would do me Justice in, especially considering
that I was come thus far to look after it.
    I said some very tender kind things in the Letter about his Son, which I
told him he knew to be my own Child, and that as I was guilty of nothing in
Marrying him any more than he was in Marrying me, neither of us having then
known our being at all related to one another; so I hop'd he would allow me the
most Passionate desire of once seeing my own, and only Child, and of showing
something of the Infirmities of a Mother in preserving a violent Affection for
him, who had never been able to retain any thought of me one way or other.
    I did believe that having receive'd this Letter, he would immediately give it
to his Son to Read; his Eyes being I knew so dim, that he cou'd not see to read
it; but it fell out better than so, for as his Sight was dim, so he had allow'd
his Son to open all Letters that came to his Hand for him, and the old Gentleman
being from Home, or out of the way when my Messenger came, my Letter came
directly to my Son's Hand, and he open'd and read it.
    He call'd the Messenger in, after some little stay, and ask'd him where the
Person was who gave him that Letter? the Messenger told him the Place, which was
about seven Miles off, so he bid him stay, and ordering a Horse to be got ready,
and two Servants, away he came to me with the Messenger: Let any one judge the
Consternation I was in, when my Messenger came back and told me the old
Gentleman was not at Home, but his Son was come along with him, and was just
coming up to me: I was perfectly confounded, for I knew not whether it was Peace
or War, nor cou'd I tell how to behave: However, I had but a very few Moments to
think, for my Son was at the Heels of the Messenger, and coming up into my
Lodgings, ask'd the Fellow at the Door something, I suppose it was, for I did
not hear it, which was the Gentlewoman that sent him? for the Messenger said,
there she is Sir, at which he comes directly up to me, kisses me, took me in his
Arms, embrace'd me with so much Passion, that he could not speak, but I could
feel his Breast heave and throb like a Child that Cries, but Sobs, and cannot
cry it out.
    I can neither express or describe the Joy, that touch'd my very Soul, when I
found, for it was easy to discover that Part, that he came not as a Stranger,
but as a Son to a Mother, and indeed a Son, who had never before known what a
Mother of his own was; in short, we cryed over one another a considerable while,
when at last he broke out first, MY DEAR MOTHER, says he, are you still a live!
I never expected to have seen your Face; as for me, I cou'd say nothing a great
while.
    After we had both recover'd ourselves a little, and were able to talk, he
told me how things stood, he told me he had not showed my Letter to his Father,
or told him anything about it; that what his Grand-mother left me, was in his
Hands, and that he would do me Justice to my full Satisfaction; that as to his
Father, he was old and infirm both in Body and Mind; that he was very Fretful,
and Passionate, almost Blind, and capable of nothing; and he question'd whether
he would know how to act in an Affair, which was of so nice a Nature as this;
and that therefore he had come himself, as well to satisfy himself in seeing me,
which he could not restrain himself from, as also to put it into my Power, to
make a Judgement after I had seen how things were, whether I would discover
myself to his Father, or no.
    This was really so prudently, and wisely manage'd, that I found my Son was a
Man of Sense, and needed no Direction from me; I told him, I did not wonder that
his Father was as he had describe'd him, for that his Head was a little touch'd
before I went away; and principally his Disturbance was, because I could not be
persuaded to live with him as my Husband, after I knew that he was my Brother:
That as he knew better than I, what his Fathers present Condition was, I should
readily joyn with him in such Measures as he would direct: That I was
indifferent, as to seeing his Father, since I had seen him first, and he cou'd
not have told me better News, than to tell me that what his Grand-mother had
left me, was entrusted in his Hands, who I doubted not now he knew who I was,
would as he said, do me Justice: I enquire'd then how long my Mother had been
dead, and where she died, and told so many particulars of the Family, that I
left him no room to doubt the Truth of my being really and truly his Mother.
    My Son then enquire'd where I was, and how I had dispos'd myself; I told him
I was on the Maryland side of the Bay, at the Plantation of a particular Friend,
who came from England in the same Ship with me, that as for that side of the Bay
where he was, I had no Habitation; he told me I should go Home with him, and
live with him, if I pleas'd, as long as I liv'd: That as to his Father, he knew
no Body, and would never so much as guess at me; I consider'd of that a little,
and told him, that tho' it was really no little concern to me to live at a
distance from him; yet I could not say it would be the most comfortable thing in
the World to me to live in the House with him; and to have that unhappy Object
always before me, which had been such a blow to my Peace before; that tho' I
should be glad to have his Company (my Son), or to be as near him as possible,
yet I could not think of being in the House where I should be also under
constant Restraint, for fear of betraying myself in my Discourse, nor should I
be able to refrain some Expressions in my Conversing with him as my Son, that
might discover the whole Affair, which would by no means be Convenient.
    He acknowledged that I was right in all this, but then, DEAR MOTHER, says
he, you shall be as near me as you can; so he took me with him on Horseback to a
Plantation, next to his own, and where I was as well entertain'd as I cou'd have
been in his own; having left me there, he went away home, telling me he would
talk of the main Business the next Day, and having first called me his Aunt, and
given a Charge to the People, who it seems were his Tenants, to treat me with
all possible Respect; about two Hours after he was gone, he sent me a
Maid-Servant and a Negro Boy to wait on me, and Provisions ready dressed for my
Supper; and thus I was as if I had been in a new World, and began almost to wish
that I had not brought my Lancashire Husband from England at all.
    However, that wish was not hearty neither, for I love'd my Lancashire Husband
entirely, as I had ever done from the beginning; and he merited it as much as it
was possible for a Man to do: but that by the way.
    The next Morning my Son came to visit me again almost as soon as I was up;
after a little Discourse, he first of all pull'd out a Deer skin Bag, and gave
it me, with five and fifty Spanish Pistoles in it, and told me that was to
supply my Expenses from England, for tho' it was not his Business to enquire,
yet he ought to think I did not bring a great deal of Money out with me, it not
being usual to bring much Money into that Country: Then he pull'd out his
Grand-mother's Will, and read it over to me, whereby it appear'd, that she left
a Plantation, on York River, to me, with the Stock of Servants and Cattle upon
it, and had given it in Trust to this Son of mine for my Use, when ever he would
hear of me, and to my Heirs, if I had any Children, and in default of Heirs, to
whomsoever I should by Will dispose of it; but gave the Income of it, till I
should be heard of, to my said Son; and if I should not be living, then it was
to him, and his Heirs.
    This Plantation, tho' remote from him, he said he did not let out, but
manage'd it by a head Clerk, as he did another that was his Fathers, that lay
hard by it, and went over himself three or four times a Year to look after it: I
ask'd him what he thought the Plantation might be worth, he said, if I would let
it out, he would give me about sixty Pounds a Year for it; but if I would live
on it, then it would be worth much more, and he believe'd would bring me in about
150l. a Year; but seeing I was likely either to Settle on the other side the Bay
, or might perhaps have a mind to go back to England, if I would let him be my
Steward he would manage it for me, as he had done for himself, and that he
believe'd he should be able to send me as much Tobacco from it, as would yield me
about a 100l. a Year, sometimes more.
    This was all strange News to me, and Things I had not been us'd to; and
really my Heart began to look up more seriously, than I think it ever did
before, and to look with great Thankfulness to the Hand of Providence, which had
done such Wonders for me, who had been my self the greatest Wonder of
Wickedness, perhaps that had been suffered to live in the World; and I must
again observe, that not on this Occasion only, but even on all other Occasions
of Thankfulness, my past Wickedness and abominable Life never look'd so
Monstrous to me, and I never so completely abhorr'd it, and reproach'd my self
with it, as when I had a Sense upon me of Providence doing good to me, while I
had been making those vile Returns on my Part.
    But I leave the Reader to improve these Thoughts, as no doubt they will see
Cause, and I go on to the Fact; my Sons tender Carriage, and kind Offers fetch'd
Tears from me, almost all the while he talk'd with me; indeed I could scarce
Discourse with him, but in the Intervals of my Passion; however, at length I
began, and expressing my self with wonder at my being so happy to have the Trust
of what I had left, put into the Hands of my own Child; I told him, that as to
the Inheritance of it, I had no Child but him in the World, and was now past
having any if I should Marry, and therefore would desire him to get a Writing
drawn, which I was ready to execute, by which I would after me give it wholly to
him, and to his Heirs; and in the mean Time smiling, I ask'd him, what made him
continue a Batchelor so long; his Answer was kind, and ready, that Virginia did
not yield any great Plenty of Wives, and that since I talk'd of going back to
England, I should send him a Wife from London.
    This was the Substance of our first Days Conversation, the pleasantest Day
that ever past over my Head in my Life, and which gave me the truest
Satisfaction: He came every Day after this, and spent great part of his time
with me, and carried me about to several of his Friends Houses, where I was
entertain'd with great Respect; also I dined several Times at his own House,
when he took Care always to see his half dead Father so out of the Way, that I
never saw him, or he me: I made him one Present, and it was all I had of Value,
and that was one of the Gold Watches, of which, I said I had two in my Chest,
and this I happen'd to have with me, and gave it him at his third Visit: I told
him, I had nothing of any Value to bestow but that, and I desire'd he would now
and then kiss it for my sake; I did not indeed tell him that I stole it from a
Gentlewoman's Side, at a Meeting House in London, that's by the way.
    He stood a little while Hesitating, as if doubtful whether to take it or no;
but I press'd it on him, and made him accept it, and it was not much less worth
than his Leather Pouch full of Spanish Gold; no, tho' it were to be reckon'd, as
if at London, whereas it was worth twice as much there; at length he took it,
kiss'd it, told me the Watch should be a Debt upon him, that he would be paying,
as long as I liv'd.
    A few Days after, he brought the Writings of Gift, and the Scrivener with
him, and I sign'd them very freely, and deliver'd them to him with a hundred
Kisses; for sure nothing ever pass'd between a Mother, and a tender Dutiful
Child, with more Affection: The next Day he brings me an Obligation under his
Hand and Seal, whereby he engage'd himself to Manage the Plantation for my
Account, and to remit the Produce to my Order where ever I should be, and
withal, oblige'd himself to make up the Produce a hundred Pound a Year to me:
When he had done so, he told me, that as I came to demand before the Crop was
off, I had a Right to the Produce of the current Year, and so he paid a hundred
Pound in Spanish Pieces of Eight, and desire'd me to give him a Receipt for it as
in Full for that Year, ending at Christmas following; this being about the
latter End of August.
    I stay'd here above five Weeks, and indeed had much a-do to get away then.
Nay, he would have come over the Bay with me, but I would by no means allow it;
however he would send me over in a Sloop of his own, which was built like a
Yacht, and serve'd him as well for Pleasure as Business: This I accepted of, and
so after the utmost Expressions both of Duty, and Affection, he let me come
away, and I arrive'd safe in two Days at my Friends the Quakers.
    I brought over with me for the Use of our Plantation, three Horses with
Harness, and Saddles; some Hogs, two Cows, and a thousand other Things, the Gift
of the Kindest and tenderest Child that ever Woman had: I related to my Husband
all the Particulars of this Voyage, except that I call'd my Son (my Cousin:) and
first I told him, that I had lost my Watch, which he seem'd to take as a
Misfortune; but then I told him how kind my Cousin had been, that my Mother had
left me such a Plantation, and that he had preserve'd it for me, in Hopes some
time or other he should hear from me; then I told him that I had left it to his
Management, that he would render me a faithful Account of its Produce; and then
I pull'd him out the hundred Pound in Silver, as the first Years Produce, and
then pulling out the Deer Skin Purse, with the Pistoles, and here my Dear, says
I, is the Gold Watch: Says my Husband, So is Heavens Goodness sure to Work the
same Effects, in all sensible Minds, where Mercies touch the Heart; lifted up
both his Hands, and with an Extasy of Joy, What is God a doing! says he, for
such an ungrateful Dog as I am! Then I let him know, what I had brought over in
the Sloop, besides all this; I mean the Horses, Hogs, and Cows, and other Stores
for our Plantation; all which added to his Surprise, and fill'd his Heart with
thankfulness; and from this time forward I believe he was as sincere a Penitent,
and as thoroughly a reform'd Man, as ever God's Goodness brought back from a
Profligate, a HighwayMan, and a Robber. I could fill a larger History than this,
with the Evidences of this Truth, and but that I doubt that Part of the Story
will not be equally diverting, as the wicked Part.
    But this is to be my own Story, not my Husbands, I return therefore to my
own Part; we went on with our own Plantation, and manage'd it with the Help and
Direction of such Friends as we got there, and especially the honest Quaker, who
prov'd a faithful, generous, and steady Friend to us; and we had very good
Success; for having a flourishing Stock to begin with, as I have said; and this
being now encreas'd by the addition of a hundred and fifty Pound Sterling in
Money, we enlarg'd our Number of Servants, built us a very good House, and cur'd
every Year a great deal of Land. The second Year I wrote to my old Governess,
giving her part with us of the Joy of our Success, and order'd her how to lay
out the Money I had left with her, which was 250l. as above, and to send it to
us in Goods, which she perform'd, with her usual Kindness and Fidelity, and all
this arrive'd safe to us.
    Here we had a Supply of all Sorts of clothes, as well for my Husband as for
my self; and I took especial Care to buy for him all those Things that I knew he
delighted to have; as two good long Wigs, two Silver Hilted Swords, three or
four fine Fowling Pieces, a fine Saddle with Holsters and Pistols very handsome,
with a Scarlet Cloak; and in a Word, everything I could think of to oblige him;
and to make him appear, as he really was, a very fine Gentleman: I order'd a
good Quantity of such Houshold-Stuff, as we wanted, with Linnen for us both; as
for my self, I wanted very little of clothes, or Linnen, being very well
furnish'd before: The rest of my Cargo consisted in Iron-Work of all Sorts,
Harness for Horses, Tools, clothes for Servants, and Woollen-Cloth, Stuffs,
Serges, Stockings, Shoes, Hats, and the like, such as Servants wear; and whole
Pieces also, to make up for Servants, all by Direction of the Quaker; and all
this Cargo arrived safe, and in good Condition, with three Women Servants, lusty
Wenches, which my old Governess had pick'd up for me, suitable enough to the
Place, and to the Work we had for them to do, one of which happen'd to come
Double, having been got with Child by one of the Seamen in the Ship, as she
own'd afterwards, before the Ship got so far as Gravesend; so she brought us a
stout Boy, about seven Months after our Landing.
    My Husband you may suppose was a little Surprise'd at the arriving of this
Cargo from England, and talking with me one Day, after he saw the Particulars;
my Dear, says he, what is the Meaning of all this? I fear you will run us too
deep in Debt: When shall we be able to make Returns for it all? I smile'd, and
told him that it was all paid for, and then I told him, that not knowing what
might befal us in the Voyage, and considering what our Circumstances might
expose us to; I had not taken my whole Stock with me, that I had reserve'd so
much in my Friend's Hands, which now we were come over safe, and settled in a
Way to Live, I had sent for as he might see.
    He was amaz'd, and stood awhile telling upon his Fingers, but said nothing,
at last he began thus; Hold let's see, says he, telling upon his Fingers still;
and first on his Thumb, there's 246l. in Money at first, then two gold Watches,
Diamond Rings and Plate, says he, upon the fore Finger, then upon the next
Finger, here's a Plantation on York River, a 100l. a Year, then 150 in Money,
then a Sloop load of Horses, Cows, Hogs, and Stores, and so on to the Thumb
again; and now, says he, a Cargo cost 250 l. in England, and worth here twice
the Money, well, says I, What do you make of all that? make of it, says he, why
who says I was deceive'd, when I married a Wife in Lancashire? I think I have
married a Fortune, and a very good Fortune too, says he.
    In a Word, we were now in very considerable Circumstances, and every Year
increasing; for our new Plantation grew upon our Hands insensibly, and in eight
Year which we lived upon it, we brought it to such a pitch, that the Produce
was, at least, 300l. Sterling a Year: I mean, worth so much in England.
    After I had been a Year at Home again, I went over the Bay to see my Son,
and to receive another Year's Income of my Plantation; and I was Surprise'd to
hear, just at my Landing there, that my old Husband was dead, and had not been
bury'd above a Fortnight. This, I confess, was not disagreeable News, because
now I could appear as I was in a marry'd Condition; so I told my Son before I
came from him, that I believe'd I should marry a Gentleman who had a Plantation
near mine; and tho' I was legally free to marry, as to any Obligation that was
on me before, yet that I was shye of it, least the Blot should some time or
other be reviv'd, and it might make a Husband uneasy; my Son, the same kind
dutiful and obliging Creature as ever, treated me now at his own House, paid me
my hundred Pound, and sent me Home again loaded with Presents.
    Some time after this, I let my Son know I was marry'd, and invited him over
to see us, and my Husband wrote a very obliging Letter to him also, inviting him
to come and see him; and he came accordingly some Months after, and happen'd to
be there just when my Cargo from England came in, which I let him believe
belong'd all to my Husband's Estate, and not to me.
    It must be observe'd, that when the old Wretch, my Brother (Husband) was
dead, I then freely gave my Husband an Account of all that Affair, and of this
Cousin, as I call'd him before, being my own Son by that mistaken Match: He was
perfectly easy in the Account, and told me he should have been easy if the old
Man, as we call'd him, had been alive; for, said he, it was no Fault of yours,
nor of his; it was a Mistake impossible to be prevented; he only reproach'd him
with desiring me to conceal it, and to live with him as a Wife, after I knew
that he was my Brother, that, he said, was a vile part: Thus all these little
Difficulties were made easy, and we liv'd together with the greatest Kindness
and Comfort imaginable; we are now grown Old, I am come back to England, being
almost seventy Years of Age, my Husband sixty eight, having perform'd much more
than the limitted Terms of my Transportation: And now notwithstanding all the
Fatigues, and all the Miseries we have both gone thro', we are both in good
Heart and Health; my Husband remain'd there some time after me to settle our
Affairs, and at first I had intended to go back to him, but at his desire I
alter'd that Resolution, and he is come over to England also, where we resolve
to spend the Remainder of our Years in sincere Penitence, for the wicked Lives
we have lived.
 
                           WRITTEN IN THE YEAR 1683.
 
                                     Finis.
 
1 The Bell of St. Sepulchre's, which Tolls upon Execution Day.
