EVELINA
OR THE HISTORY OF A YOUNG LADYS ENTRANCE INTO THE WORLD
1778
BY FANNY BURNEY
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ORIGINAL INSCRIPTION TO DR BURNEY
Oh Author of my beingfar more dear
To me than light than nourishment or rest
Hygeias blessings Raptures burning tear
Or the lifeblood that mantles in my breast
If in my heart the love of Virtue glows
T was planted there by an unerring rule
From thy example the pure flame arose
Thy life my preceptthy good works my school
Could my weak powrs thy numrous virtues trace
By filial love each fear should be repressd
The blush of Incapacity Id chace
And stand Recorder of thy worth confessd
But since my niggard stars that gift refuse
Concealment is the only boon I claim
Obscure be still the unsuccessful Muse
Who cannot raise but would not sink thy fame
Oh of my life at once the source and joy
If eer thy eyes these feeble lines survey
Let not their folly their intent destroy
Accept the tributebut forget the lay
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TO THE AUTHORS OF THE MONTHLY AND CRITICAL REVIEWS
GENTLEMEN The liberty which I take in addressing to you the trifling production of a few idle hours will doubtless move your wonder and probably your contempt I will not however with the futility of apologies intrude upon your time but briefly acknowledge the motives of my temerity lest by a premature exercise of that patience which I hope will befriend me I should lessen its benevolence and be accessary to my own condemnation
Without name without recommendation and unknown alike to success and disgrace to whom can I so properly apply for patronage as to those who publicly profess themselves Inspectors of all literary performances
The extensive plan of your critical observationswhich not confined to works of utility or ingenuity is equally open to those of frivolous amusementand yet worse than frivolous dullnessencourages me to seek for your protection sinceperhaps for my sinsit intitles me to your annotations To resent therefore this offering however insignificant would ill become the universality of your undertaking though not to despise it may alas be out of your power
The language of adulation and the incense of flattery though the natural inheritance and constant resource from time immemorial of the Dedicator to me offer nothing but the wistful regret that I dare not invoke their aid Sinister views would be imputed to all I could say since thus situated to extol your judgment would seem the effect of art and to celebrate your impartiality be attributing to suspecting it
As magistrates of the press and Censors for the publicto which you are bound by the sacred ties of integrity to exert the most spirited impartiality and to which your suffrages should carry the marks of pure dauntless irrefragable truthto appeal to your MERCY were to solicit your dishonour and thereforethough tis sweeter than frankincensemore grateful to the senses than all the odorous perfumes of Arabiaand though
It droppeth like the gentle rain from heaven Upon the place beneath
I court it not to your justice alone I am intitled and by that I must abide Your engagements are not to the supplicating authors but to the candid public which will not fail to crave
The penalty and forfeit of your bond
No hackneyed writer inured to abuse and callous to criticism here braves your severityneither does a halfstarved garretteer
Obligd by hungerand request of friends
implore your lenity your examination will be alike unbiassed by partiality and prejudiceno refractory murmuring will follow your censure no private interest will be gratified by your praise
Let not the anxious solicitude with which I recommend myself to your notice expose me to your derision Remember Gentlemen you were all young writers once and the most experienced veteran of your corps may by recollecting his first publication renovate his first terrors and learn to allow for mine For though Courage is one of the noblest virtues of this nether sphere and though scarcely more requisite in the field of battle to guard the fighting hero from disgrace than in the private commerce of the world to ward off that littleness of soul which leads by steps imperceptible to all the base train of the inferior passions and by which the too timid mind is betrayed into a servility derogatory to the dignity of human nature yet is it a virtue of no necessity in a situation such as mine a situation which removes even from cowardice itself the sting of ignominyfor surely that courage may easily be dispensed with which would rather excite disgust than admiration Indeed it is the peculiar privilege of an author to rob terror of contempt and pusillanimity of reproach
Here let me rest and snatch myself while I yet am able from the fascination of EGOTISMa monster who has more votaries than ever did homage to the most popular deity of antiquity and whose singular quality is that while he excites a blind and involuntary adoration in almost every individual his influence is universally disallowed his power universally contemned and his worship even by his followers never mentioned but with abhorence
In addressing you jointly I mean but to mark the generous sentiments by which liberal criticism to the utter annihilation of envy jealousy and all selfish views ought to be distinguished
I have the honour to be
GENTLEMEN
Your most obedient
Humble Servant
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ORIGINAL PREFACE
IN the republic of letters there is no member of such inferior rank or who is so much disdained by his brethren of the quill as the humble Novelist nor is his fate less hard in the world at large since among the whole class of writers perhaps not one can be named of which the votaries are more numerous but less respectable
Yet while in the annals of those few of our predecessors to whom this species of writing is indebted for being saved from contempt and rescued from depravity we can trace such names as Rousseau Johnson1Marivaux Fielding Richardson and Smollett no man need blush at starting from the same post though many nay most men may sigh at finding themselves distanced
The following letters are presented to the Publicfor such by novel writers novel readers will be calledwith a very singular mixture of timidity and confidence resulting from the peculiar situation of the editor who though trembling for their success from a consciousness of their imperfections yet fears not being involved in their disgrace while happily wrapped up in a mantle of impenetrable obscurity
To draw characters from nature though not from life and to mark the manners of the times is the attempted plan of the following letters For this purpose a young female educated in the most secluded retirement makes at the age of seventeen her first appearance upon the great and busy stage of life with a virtuous mind a cultivated understanding and a feeling heart her ignorance of the forms and inexperience in the manners of the world occasion all the little incidents which these volumes record and which form the natural progression of the life of a young woman of obscure birth but conspicuous beauty for the first six months after her Entrance into the world
Perhaps were it possible to effect the total extirpation of novels our young ladies in general and boardingschool damsels in particular might profit from their annihilation but since the distemper they have spread seems incurable since their contagion bids defiance to the medicine of advice or reprehension and since they are found to baffle all the mental art of physic save what is prescribed by the slow regimen of Time and bitter diet of Experience surely all attempts to contribute to the number of those which may be read if not with advantage at least without injury ought rather to be encouraged than contemned
Let me therefore prepare for disappointment those who in the perusal of these sheets entertain the gentle expectation of being transported to the fantastic regions of Romance where Fiction is coloured by all the gay tints of luxurious Imagination where Reason is an outcast and where the sublimity of the Marvellous rejects all aid from sober Probability The heroine of these memoirs young artless and inexperienced is
No faultless Monster that the world neer saw
but the offspring of Nature and of Nature in her simplest attire
In all the Arts the value of copies can only be proportioned to the scarcity of originals among sculptors and painters a fine statue or a beautiful picture of some great master may deservedly employ the imitative talents of young and inferior artists that their appropriation to one spot may not wholly prevent the more general expansion of their excellence but among authors the reverse is the case since the noblest productions of literature are almost equally attainable with the meanest In books therefore imitation cannot be shunned too sedulously for the very perfection of a model which is frequently seen serves but more forcibly to mark the inferiority of a copy
To avoid what is common without adopting what is unnatural must limit the ambition of the vulgar herd of authors however zealous therefore my veneration of the great writers I have mentioned however I may feel myself enlightened by the knowledge of Johnson charmed with the eloquence of Rousseau softened by the pathetic powers of Richardson and exhiliarated by the wit of Fielding and humour of Smollett I yet presume not to attempt pursuing the same ground which they have tracked whence though they may have cleared the weeds they have also culled the flowers and though they have rendered the path plain they have left it barren
The candour of my readers I have not the impertinence to doubt and to their indulgence I am sensible I have no claim I have therefore only to intreat that my own words may not pronounce my condemnation and that what I have here ventured to say in regard to imitation may be understood as it is meant in a general sense and not be imputed to an opinion of my own originality which I have not the vanity the folly or the blindness to entertain
Whatever may be the fate of these letters the editor is satisfied they will meet with justice and commits them to the press though hopeless of fame yet not regardless of censure
1However superior the capacities in which these great writers deserve to be considered they must pardon me that for the dignity of my subject I here rank the authors of Rasselas and Eloise as Novelists
LETTER I
LADY HOWARD TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove Kent
CAN any thing my good Sir be more painful to a friendly mind than a necessity of communicating disagreeable intelligence Indeed it is sometimes difficult to determine whether the relator or the receiver of evil tidings is most to be pitied
I have just had a letter from Madame Duval she is totally at a loss in what manner to behave she seems desirous to repair the wrongs she has done yet wishes the world to believe her blameless She would fain cast upon another the odium of those misfortunes for which she alone is answerable Her letter is violent sometimes abusive and that of youyou to whom she is under obligations which are greater even than her faults but to whose advice she wickedly imputes all the sufferings of her much injured daughter the late Lady Belmont The chief purport of her writing I will acquaint you with the letter itself is not worthy your notice
She tells me that she has for many years past been in continual expectation of making a journey to England which prevented her writing for information concerning this melancholy subject by giving her hopes of making personal inquiries but family occurrences have still detained her in France which country she now sees no prospect of quitting She has therefore lately used her utmost endeavors to obtain a faithful account of whatever related to her illadvised daughter the result of which giving her some reason to apprehend that upon her deathbed she bequeathed an infant orphan to the world she most graciously says that if you with whom she understands the child is placed will procure authentic proofs of its relationship to her you may sent it to Paris where she will properly provide for it
This woman is undoubtedly at length selfconvicted of her most unnatural behaviour it is evident, from her writing that she is still as vulgar and illiterate as when her first husband Mr Evelyn had the weakness to marry her nor does she at all apologize for addressing herself to me though I was only once in her company
Her letter has excited in my daughter Mirvan a strong desire to be informed of the motives which induced Madame Duval to abandon the unfortunate Lady Belmont at a time when a mothers protection was peculiarly necessary for her peace and her reputation Notwithstanding I was personally acquainted with all the parties concerned in that affair the subject always appeared of too delicate a nature to be spoken of with the principals I cannot therefore satisfy Mrs Mirvan otherwise than by applying to you
By saying that you may send the child Madame Duval aims at conferring where she most owes obligation I pretend not to give you advice you to whose generous protection this helpless orphan is indebted for every thing are the best and only judge of what she ought to do but I am much concerned at the trouble and uneasiness which this unworthy woman may occasion you
My daughter and my grandchild join with me in desiring to be most kindly remembered to the amiable girl and they bid me remind you that the annual visit to Howard Grove which we were formerly promised has been discontinued for more than four years I am dear Sir with great regard Your most obedient friend and servant M HOWARD
LETTER II
MR VILLARS TO LADY HOWARD Berry Hill Dorsetshire
YOUR Ladyship did but too well foresee the perplexity and uneasiness of which Madame Duvals letter has been productive However I ought rather to be thankful that I have so many years remained unmolested than repine at my present embarrassment since it proves at least that this wretched woman is at length awakened to remorse
In regard to my answer I must humbly request your Ladyship to write to this effect That I would not upon any account intentionally offend Madame Duval but that I have weighty nay unanswerable reasons for detaining her granddaughter at present in England the principal of which is, that it was the earnest desire of one to whose will she owes implicit duty Madame Duval may be assured that she meets with the utmost attention and tenderness that her education however short of my wishes almost exceeds my abilities and I flatter myself when the time arrives that she shall pay her duty to her grandmother Madame Duval will find no reason to be dissatisfied with what has been done for her
Your Ladyship will not I am sure be surprised at this answer Madame Duval is by no means a proper companion or guardian for a young woman she is at once uneducated and unprincipled ungentle in temper and unamiable in her manners I have long known that she has persuaded herself to harbour an aversion for meUnhappy woman I can only regard her as an object of pity
I dare not hesitate at a request from Mrs Mirvan yet in complying with it I shall for her own sake be as concise as I possibly can since the cruel transactions which preceded the birth of my ward can afford no entertainment to a mind so humane as hers
Your Ladyship may probably have heard that I had the honour to accompany Mr Evelyn the grandfather of my young charge when upon his travels in the capacity of a tutor His unhappy marriage immediately upon his return to England with Madame Duval then a waitinggirl at a tavern contrary to the advice and entreaties of all his friends among whom I was myself the most urgent induced him to abandon his native land and fix his abode in France Thither he was followed by shame and repentance feelings which his heart was not framed to support for notwithstanding he had been too weak to resist the allurements of beauty which nature though a niggard to her of every other boon had with a lavish hand bestowed on his wife yet he was a young man of excellent character and till thus unaccountably infatuated of unblemished conduct He survived this illjudged marriage but two years Upon his deathbed with an unsteady hand he wrote me the following note
My friend forget your resentment in favour of your humanitya father trembling for the welfare of his child bequeaths her to your care O Villars hear pity And relieve me
Had my circumstances permitted me I should have answered these words by an immediate journey to Paris but I was obliged to act by the agency of a friend who was upon the spot and present at the opening of the will
Mr Evelyn left to me a legacy of a thousand pounds and the sole guardianship of his daughters person till her eighteenth year conjuring me in the most affecting terms to take the charge of her education till she was able to act with propriety for herself but in regard to fortune he left her wholly dependent on her mother to whose tenderness he earnestly recommended her
Thus though he would not to a woman lowbred and illiberal as Mrs Evelyn trust the conduct and morals of his daughter he nevertheless thought proper to secure to her the respect and duty to which from her own child were certainly her due but unhappily it never occurred to him that the mother on her part could fail in affection or justice
Miss Evelyn Madam from the second to the eighteenth year of her life was brought up under my care and except when at school under my roof I need not speak to your Ladyship of the virtues of that excellent young creature She loved me as her father nor was Mrs Villars less valued by her while to me she became so dear that her loss was little less afflicting than that which I have since sustained of Mrs Villars herself
At that period of her life we parted her mother then married to Monsieur Duval sent for her to Paris How often have I since regretted that I did not accompany her thither Protected and supported by me the misery and disgrace which awaited her might perhaps have been avoided But to be briefMadame Duval at the instigation of her husband earnestly or rather tyrannically endeavoured to effect a union between Miss Evelyn and one of his nephews And when she found her power inadequate to her attempt enraged at her noncompliance she treated her with the grossest unkindness and threatened her with poverty and ruin
Miss Evelyn to whom wrath and violence had hitherto been strangers soon grew weary of such usage and rashly and without a witness consented to a private marriage with Sir John Belmont a very profligate young man who had but too successfully found means to insinuate himself into her favour He promised to conduct her to Englandhe didO Madam you know the restDisappointed of the fortune he expected by the inexorable rancour of the Duvals he infamously burnt the certificate of their marriage and denied that they had ever been united
She flew to me for protection With what mixed transports of joy and anguish did I again see her By my advice she endeavoured to procure proofs of her marriagebut in vain her credulity had been no match for his art
Every body believed her innocent from the guiltless tenor of her unspotted youth and from the known libertinism of her barbarous betrayer Yet her sufferings were too acute for her slender frame and the same moment that gave birth to her infant put an end at once to the sorrows and the life of its mother
The rage of Madame Duval at her elopement abated not while this injured victim of cruelty yet drew breath She probably intended in time to have pardoned her but time was not allowed When she was informed of her death I have been told that the agonies of grief and remorse with which she was seized occasioned her a severe fit of illness But from the time of her recovery to the date of her letter to your Ladyship I had never heard that she manifested any desire to be made acquainted with the circumstances which attended the death of Lady Belmont and the birth of her helpless child
That child Madam shall never while life is lent me know the loss she has sustained I have cherished succoured and supported her from her earliest infancy to her sixteenth year and so amply has she repaid my care and affection that my fondest wish is now circumscribed by the desire of bestowing her on one who may be sensible of her worth and then sinking to eternal rest in her arms
Thus it has happened that the education of the father daughter and granddaughter has devolved on me What infinite misery have the two first caused me Should the fate of the dear survivor be equally adverse how wretched will be the end of my caresthe end of my days
Even had Madame Duval merited the charge she claims I fear my fortitude would have been unequal to such a parting but being such as she is not only my affection but my humanity recoils at the barbarous idea of deserting the sacred trust reposed in me Indeed I could but ill support her former yearly visits to the respectable mansion at Howard Grove pardon me dear Madam and do not think me insensible of the honour which your Ladyships condescension confers upon us both but so deep is the impression which the misfortunes of her mother have made on my heart that she does not even for a moment quit my sight without exciting apprehensions and terrors which almost overpower me Such Madam is my tenderness and such my weaknessBut she is the only tie I have upon earth and I trust to your Ladyships goodness not to judge of my feelings with severity
I beg leave to present my humble respects to Mrs and Miss Mirvan and have the honour to be Madam your Ladyships most obedient and most humble servant ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER III Written some months after the last
LADY HOWARD TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove March 8
Dear and Rev Sir
YOUR last letter gave me infinite pleasure after so long and tedious an illness how grateful to yourself and to your friends must be your returning health You have the hearty wishes of every individual of this place for its continuance and increase
Will you not think I take advantage of your acknowledged recovery if I once more venture to mention your pupil and Howard Grove together Yet you must remember the patience with which we submitted to your desire of not parting with her during the bad state of your health tho it was with much reluctance we forbore to solicit her company My granddaughter in particular has scarce been able to repress her eagerness to again meet the friend of her infancy and for my own part it is very strongly my wish to manifest the regard I had for the unfortunate Lady Belmont by proving serviceable to her child which seems to me the best respect that can be paid to her memory Permit me therefore to lay before you a plan which Mrs Mirvan and I have formed in consequence of your restoration to health
I would not frighten youbut do you think you could bear to part with your young companion for two or three months Mrs Mirvan proposes to spend the ensuing spring in London whither for the first time my grandchild will accompany her Now my good friend it is very earnestly their wish to enlarge and enliven their party by the addition of your amiable ward who would share equally with her own daughter the care and attention of Mrs Mirvan Do not start at this proposal it is time that she should see something of the world When young people are too rigidly sequestered from it their lively and romantic imaginations paint it to them as a paradise of which they have been beguiled but when they are shown it properly and in due time they see it such as it really is equally shared by pain and pleasure hope and disappointment
You have nothing to apprehend from her meeting with Sir John Belmont as that abandoned man is now abroad and not expected home this year
Well my good Sir what say you to our scheme I hope it will meet with your approbation but if it should not be assured I can never object to any decision of one who is so much respected and esteemed as Mr Villars by His most faithful humble servant M HOWARD
LETTER IV
MR VILLARS TO LADY HOWARD Berry Hill March 12
I AM grieved Madam to appear obstinate and I blush to incur the imputation of selfishness In detaining my young charge thus long with myself in the country I consulted not solely my own inclination Destined in all probability to possess a very moderate fortune I wished to contract her views to something within it The mind is but too naturally prone to pleasure but too easily yielded to dissipation it has been my study to guard her against their delusions by preparing her to expectand to despise them But the time draws on for experience and observation to take the place of instruction if I have in some measure rendered her capable of using one with discretion and making the other with improvement I shall rejoice myself with the assurance of having largely contributed to her welfare She is now of an age that happiness is eager to attendlet her then enjoy it I commit her to the protection of your Ladyship and only hope she may be found worthy half the goodness I am satisfied she will meet with at your hospitable mansion
Thus far Madam I cheerfully submit to your desire In confiding my ward to the care of Lady Howard I can feel no uneasiness from her absence but what will arise from the loss of her company since I shall be as well convinced of her safety as if she were under my own roofBut can your Ladyship be serious in proposing to introduce her to the gaieties of a London life Permit me to ask for what end or for what purpose A youthful mind is seldom totally free from ambition to curb that is the first step to contentment since to diminish expectation is to increase enjoyment I apprehend nothing more than too much raising her hopes and her views which the natural vivacity of her disposition would render but too easy to effect The townacquaintance of Mrs Mirvan are all in the circle of high life this artless young creature with too much beauty to escape notice has too much sensibility to be indifferent to it but she has too little wealth to be sought with propriety by men of the fashionable world
Consider Madam the peculiar cruelty of her situation Only child of a wealthy Baronet whose person she has never seen whose character she has reason to abhor and whose name she is forbidden to claim entitled as she is to lawfully inherit his fortune and estate is there any probability that he will properly own her And while he continues to persevere in disavowing his marriage with Miss Evelyn she shall never at the expense of her mothers honour receive a part of her right as the donation of his bounty
And as to Mr Evelyns estate I have no doubt but that Madame Duval and her relations will dispose of it among themselves
It seems therefore as if this deserted child though legally heiress to two large fortunes must owe all her rational expectations to adoption and friendship Yet her income will be such as may make her happy if she is disposed to be so in private life though it will by no means allow her to enjoy the luxury of a London fine lady
Let Miss Mirvan then Madam shine in all the splendour of high life but suffer my child still to enjoy the pleasures of humble retirement with a mind to which greater views are unknown
I hope this reasoning will be honoured with your approbation and I have yet another motive which has some weight with me I would not willingly give offence to any human being and surely Madame Duval might accuse me of injustice if while I refuse to let her granddaughter wait upon her I consent that she should join a party of pleasure to London
In sending her to Howard Grove not one of these scruples arise and therefore Mrs Clinton a most worthy woman formerly her nurse and now my housekeeper shall attend her thither next week
Though I have always called her by the name of Anville and reported in this neighbourhood that her father my intimate friend left her to my guardianship yet I have thought it necessary she should herself be acquainted with the melancholy circumstances attending her birth for though I am very desirous of guarding her from curiosity and impertinence by concealing her name family and story yet I would not leave it in the power of chance to shock her gentle nature with a tale of so much sorrow
You must not Madam expect too much from my pupil she is quite a little rustic and knows nothing of the world and though her education has been the best I could bestow in this retired place to which Dorchester the nearest town is seven miles distant yet I shall not be surprised if you should discover in her a thousand deficiencies of which I have never dreamt She must be very much altered since she was last at Howard Grove But I will say nothing of her I leave her to your Ladyships own observations of which I beg a faithful relation and am Dear Madam with great respect Your obedient and most humble Servant ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER V
MR VILLARS TO LADY HOWARD March 18 Dear Madam
THIS letter will be delivered to you by my childthe child of my adoptionmy affection Unblest with one natural friend she merits a thousand I send her to you innocent as an angel and artless as purity itself and I send you with her the heart of your friend the only hope he has on earth the subject of his tenderest thoughts and the object of his latest cares She is one Madam for whom alone I have lately wished to live and she is one whom to serve I would with transport die Restore her but to me all innocence as you receive her and the fondest hope of my heart will be amply gratified A VILLARS
LETTER VI
LADY HOWARD TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove
Dear Rev Sir
THE solemn manner in which you have committed your child to my care has in some measure damped the pleasure which I receive from the trust as it makes me fear that you suffer from your compliance in which case I shall very sincerely blame myself for the earnestness with which I have requested this favour but remember my good Sir she is within a few days summons and be assured I will not detain her a moment longer than you wish
You desire my opinion of her
She is a little angel I cannot wonder that you sought to monopolize her neither ought you at finding it impossible
Her face and person answer my most refined ideas of complete beauty and this though a subject of praise less important to you or to me than any other is yet so striking it is not possible to pass it unnoticed Had I not known from whom she received her education I should at first sight of so perfect a face have been in pain for her understanding since it has been long and justly remarked that folly has ever sought alliance with beauty
She has the same gentleness in her manners the same natural graces in her motions that I formerly so much admired in her mother Her character seems truly ingenuous and simple and at the same time that nature has blessed her with an excellent understanding and great quickness of parts she has a certain air of inexperience and innocency that is extremely interesting
You have not reason to regret the retirement in which she has lived since that politeness which is acquired by an acquaintance with high life is in her so well supplied by a natural desire of obliging joined to a deportment infinitely engaging
I observe with great satisfaction a growing affection between this amiable girl and my granddaughter whose heart is as free from selfishness or conceit as that of her young friend is from all guile Their regard may be mutually useful since much is to be expected from emulation where nothing is to be feared from envy I would have them love each other as sisters and reciprocally supply the place of that tender and happy relationship to which neither of them has a natural claim
Be satisfied my good Sir that your child shall meet with the same attention as our own We all join in most hearty wishes for your health and happiness and in returning our sincere thanks for the favour you have conferred on us I am dear Sir Your most faithful servant M HOWARD
LETTER VII
LADY HOWARD TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove March 26
BE not alarmed my worthy friend at my so speedily troubling you again I seldom use the ceremony of waiting for answers or writing with any regularity and I have at present immediate occasion for begging your patience
Mrs Mirvan has just received a letter from her long absent husband containing the welcome news of his hoping to reach London by the beginning of next week My daughter and the Captain have been separated almost seven years and it would therefore be needless to say what joy surprise and consequently confusion his at present unexpected return has caused at Howard Grove Mrs Mirvan you cannot doubt will go instantly to town to meet him her daughter is under a thousand obligations to attend her I grieve that her mother cannot
And now my good Sir I almost blush to proceedbut tell me may I askwill you permitthat your child may accompany them Do not think us unreasonable but consider the many inducements which conspire to make London the happiest place at present she can be in The joyful occasion of the journey the gaiety of the whole party opposed to the dull life she must lead if left here with a solitary old woman for her sole companion while she so well knows the cheerfulness and felicity enjoyed by the rest of the familyare circumstances that seem to merit your consideration Mrs Mirvan desires me to assure you that one week is all she asks as she is certain that the Captain who hates London will be eager to revisit Howard Grove and Maria is so very earnest in wishing to have the company of her friend that if you are inexorable she will be deprived of half the pleasure she otherwise hopes to receive
However I will not my good Sir deceive you into an opinion that they intend to live in a retired manner as that cannot be fairly expected But you have no reason to be uneasy concerning Madame Duval she has not any correspondent in England and obtains no intelligence but by common report She must be a stranger to the name your child bears and even should she hear of this excursion so short a time as a week or less spent in town upon so particular an occasion though previous to their meeting cannot be construed into disrespect to herself
Mrs Mirvan desires me to assure you that if you will oblige her her two children shall equally share her time and her attention She has sent a commission to a friend in town to take a house for her and while she waits for an answer concerning it I shall for one from you to our petition However your child is writing herself and that I doubt not will more avail than all we can possible urge
My daughter desires her best compliments to you if she says you will grant her request but not else
Adieu my dear Sir we all hope every thing from your goodness
M HOWARD
LETTER VIII
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove March 26
THIS house seems to be the house of joy every face wears a smile and a laugh is at every bodys service It is quite amusing to walk about and see the general confusion a room leading to the garden is fitting up for Captain Mirvans study Lady Howard does not sit a moment in a place Miss Mirvan is making caps every body so busysuch flying from room to roomso many orders given and retracted and given again nothing but hurry and perturbation
Well but my dear Sir I am desired to make a request to you I hope you will not think me an encroacher Lady Howard insists upon my writingyet I hardly know how to go on a petition implies a want and have you left me one No indeed
I am half ashamed of myself for beginning this letter But these dear ladies are so pressingI cannot for my life resist wishing for the pleasures they offer meprovided you do not disapprove them
They are to make a very short stay in town The Captain will meet them in a day or two Mrs Mirvan and her sweet daughter both go what a happy party Yet I am not very eager to accompany them at least I shall be contented to remain where I am if you desire that I should
Assured my dearest Sir of your goodness your bounty and your indulgent kindness ought I to form a wish that has not your sanction Decide for me therefore without the least apprehension that I shall be uneasy or discontented While I am yet in suspense perhaps I may hope but I am most certain that when you have once determined I shall not repine
They tell me that London is now in full splendour Two playhouses are openthe OperahouseRanelaghand the PantheonYou see I have learned all their names However pray dont suppose that I make any point of going for I shall hardly sigh to see them depart without me though I shall probably never meet with such another opportunity And indeed their domestic happiness will be so greatit is natural to wish to partake of it
I believe I am bewitched I made a resolution when I began that I would not be urgent but my penor rather my thoughts will not suffer me to keep itfor I acknowledge I must acknowledge I cannot help wishing for your permission
I almost repent already that I have made this confession pray forget that you have read it if this journey is displeasing to you But I will not write any longer for the more I think of this affair the less indifferent to it I find myself
Adieu my most honoured most reverenced most beloved father for by what other name can I call you I have no happiness or sorrow no hope or fear but what your kindness bestows or your displeasure may cause You will not I am sure send a refusal without reasons unanswerable and therefore I shall cheerfully acquiesce Yet I hopeI hope you will be able to permit me to go I am with the utmost affection gratitude and duty your EVELINA
I cannot to you sign ANVILLE and what other name may I claim
LETTER IX
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill March 28
TO resist the urgency of intreaty is a power which I have not yet acquired I aim not at an authority which deprives you of liberty yet I would fain guide myself by a prudence which should save me the pangs of repentance Your impatience to fly to a place which your imagination has painted to you in colors so attractive surprises me not I have only to hope that the liveliness of your fancy may not deceive you to refuse would be raising it still higher To see my Evelina happy is to see myself without a wish go then my child and may that Heaven which alone can direct preserve and strengthen you To that my love will I daily offer prayers for your felicity O may it guard watch over you defend you from danger save you from distress and keep vice as distant from your person as from your heart And to me may it grant the ultimate blessing of closing these aged eyes in the arms of one so dearso deservedly beloved ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER X
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Queen Ann Street London Saturday
April 2
THIS moment arrived Just going to Drury Lane Theatre The celebrated Mr Garrick performs Ranger I am quite in ecstasy So is Miss Mirvan How fortunate that he should happen to play We would not let Mrs Mirvan rest till she consented to go Her chief objection was to our dress for we have had no time to Londonize ourselves but we teased her into compliance and so we are to sit in some obscure place that she may not be seen As to me I should be alike unknown in the most conspicuous or most private part of the house
I can write no more now I have hardly time to breatheonly just this the houses and streets are not quite so superb as I expected However I have seen nothing yet so I ought not to judge
Well adieu my dearest Sir for the present I could not forbear writing a few words instantly on my arrival though I suppose my letter of thanks for your consent is still on the road Saturday Night
O my dear Sir in what raptures am I returned Well may Mr Garrick be so celebrated so universally admiredI had not any idea of so great a performer
Such ease such vivacity in his manner such grace in his motions such fire and meaning in his eyesI could hardly believe he had studied a written part for every word seemed to be uttered from the impulse of the moment
His actionat once so graceful and so freehis voiceso clear so melodious yet so wonderfully various in its tonesSuch animationevery look speaks
I would have given the world to have had the whole play acted over again And when he dancedO how I envied Clarinda I almost wished to have jumped on the stage and joined them
I am afraid you will think me mad so I wont say any more yet I really believe Mr Garrick would make you mad too if you could see him I intend to ask Mrs Mirvan to go to the play every night while we stay in town She is extremely kind to me and Maria her charming daughter is the sweetest girl in the world
I shall write to you every evening all that passes in the day and that in the same manner as if I could see I should tell you Sunday
This morning we went to Portland chapel and afterwards we walked in the mall of St Jamess Park which by no means answered my expectations it is a long straight walk of dirty gravel very uneasy to the feet and at each end instead of an open prospect nothing is to be seen but houses built of brick When Mrs Mirvan pointed out the Palace to meI think I was never much more surprised
However the walk was very agreeable to us every body looked gay and seemed pleased and the ladies were so much dressed that Miss Mirvan and I could do nothing but look at them Mrs Mirvan met several of her friends No wonder for I never saw so many people assembled together before I looked about for some of my acquaintance but in vain for I saw not one person that I knew which is very odd for all the world seemed there
Mrs Mirvan says we are not to walk in the Park again next Sunday even if we should be in town because there is better company in Kensington Gardens but really if you had seen how much every body was dressed you would not think that possible Monday
We are to go this evening to a private ball given by Mrs Stanley a very fashionable lady of Mrs Mirvans acquaintance
We have been ashopping as Mrs Mirvan calls it all this morning to buy silks caps gauzes and so forth
The shops are really very entertaining especially the mercers there seem to be six or seven men belonging to each shop and every one took care by bowing and smirking to be noticed We were conducted from one to another and carried from room to room with so much ceremony that at I was almost afraid to go on
I thought I should never have chosen a silk for they produced so many I knew not which to fix upon and they recommended them all so strongly that I fancy they thought I only wanted persuasion to buy every thing they showed me And indeed they took so much trouble that I was almost ashamed I could not
At the milliners the ladies we met were so much dressed that I should rather have imagined they were making visits than purchases But what most diverted me was that we were more frequently served by men than by women and such men so finical so affected they seemed to understand every part of a womans dress better than we do ourselves and they recommended caps and ribbands with an air of so much importance that I wished to ask them how long they had left off wearing them
The dispatch with which they work in these great shops is amazing for they have promised me a complete suit of linen against the evening
I have just had my hair dressed You cant think how oddly my head feels full of powder and black pins and a great cushion on the top of it I believe you would hardly know me for my face looks quite different to what it did before my hair was dressed When I shall be able to make use of a comb for myself I cannot tell for my hair is so much entangled frizzled they call it that I fear it will be very difficult
I am half afraid of this ball tonight for you know I have never danced but at school however Miss Mirvan says there is nothing in it Yet I wish it was over
Adieu my dear Sir pray excuse the wretched stuff I write perhaps I may improve by being in this town and then my letters will be less unworthy your reading Meantime I am Your dutiful and affectionate though unpolished EVELINA
Poor Miss Mirvan cannot wear one of the caps she made because they dress her hair too large for them
LETTER XI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Queen Ann Street April 5 Tuesday Morning
I HAVE a vast deal to say and shall give all this morning to my pen
As to my plan of writing every evening the adventures of the day I find it impracticable for the diversions here are so very late that if I begin my letters after them I could not go to bed at all
We passed a most extraordinary evening A private ball this was called so I expected to have seen about four or five couple but Lord my dear Sir I believe I saw half the world Two very large rooms were full of company in one were cards for the elderly ladies and in the other were the dancers My mamma Mirvan for she always calls me her child said she would sit with Maria and me till we were provided with partners and then join the cardplayers
The gentlemen as they passed and repassed looked as if they thought we were quite at their disposal and only waiting for the honour of their commands and they sauntered about in a careless indolent manner as if with a view to keep us in suspense I dont speak of this in regard to Miss Mirvan and myself only but to the ladies in general and I thought it so provoking that I determined in my own mind that far from humouring such airs I would rather not dance at all than with any one who would seem to think me ready to accept the first partner who would condescend to take me
Not long after a young man who had for some time looked at us with a kind of negligent impertinence advanced on tiptoe towards me he had a set smile on his face and his dress was so foppish that I really believed he even wished to be stared at and yet he was very ugly
Bowing almost to the ground with a sort of swing and waving his hand with the greatest conceit after a short and silly pause he said Madammay I presumeand stopt offering to take my hand I drew it back but could scarce forbear laughing Allow me Madam continued he affectedly breaking off every half moment the honour and happinessif I am not so unhappy as to address you too lateto have the happiness and honour
Again he would have taken my hand but bowing my head I begged to be excused and turned to Miss Mirvan to conceal my laughter He then desired to know if I had already engaged myself to some more fortunate man I said No and that I believed I should not dance at all He would keep himself he told me disengaged in hopes I should relent and then uttering some ridiculous speeches of sorrow and disappointment though his face still wore the same invariable smile he retreated
It so happened as we have since recollected that during this little dialogue Mrs Mirvan was conversing with the lady of the house And very soon after another gentleman who seemed about sixandtwenty years old gaily but not foppishly dressed and indeed extremely handsome with an air of mixed politeness and gallantry desired to know if I was engaged or would honour him with my hand So he was pleased to say though I am sure I know not what honour he could receive from me but these sort of expressions I find are used as words of course without any distinction of persons or study of propriety
Well I bowed and I am sure I coloured for indeed I was frightened at the thoughts of dancing before so many people all strangers and which was worse with a stranger however that was unavoidable for though I looked round the room several times I could not see one person that I knew And so he took my hand and led me to join in the dance
The minuets were over before we arrived for we were kept late by the milliners making us wait for our things
He seemed very desirous of entering into conversation with me but I was seized with such a panic that I could hardly speak a word and nothing but the shame of so soon changing my mind prevented my returning to my seat and declining to dance at all
He appeared to be surprised at my terror which I believe was but too apparent however he asked no questions though I fear he must think it very strange for I did not choose to tell him it was owing to my never before dancing but with a schoolgirl
His conversation was sensible and spirited his air and address were open and noble his manners gentle attentive and infinitely engaging his person is all elegance and his countenance the most animated and expressive I have ever seen
In a short time we were joined by Miss Mirvan who stood next couple to us But how I was startled when she whispered me that my partner was a nobleman This gave me a new alarm how will he be provoked thought I when he finds what a simple rustic he has honoured with his choice one whose ignorance of the world makes her perpetually fear doing something wrong
That he should be so much my superior in every way quite disconcerted me and you will suppose my spirits were not much raised when I heard a lady in passing us say This is the most difficult dance I ever saw
O dear then cried Maria to her partner with your leave Ill sit down till the next
So will I too then cried I for I am sure I can hardly stand
But you must speak to your partner first answered she for he had turned aside to talk with some gentlemen However I had not sufficient courage to address him and so away we all three tript and seated ourselves at another end of the room
But unfortunately for me Miss Mirvan soon after suffered herself to be prevailed upon to attempt the dance and just as she rose to go she cried My dear yonder is your partner Lord Orville walking about the room in search of you
Dont leave me then dear girl cried I but she was obliged to go And now I was more uneasy than ever I would have given the world to have seen Mrs Mirvan and begged of her to make my apologies for what thought I can I possibly say to him in excuse for running away He must either conclude me a fool or half mad for any one brought up in the great world and accustomed to its ways can have no idea of such sort of fears as mine
My confusion increased when I observed that he was every where seeking me with apparent perplexity and surprise but when at last I saw him move towards the place where I sat I was ready to sink with shame and distress I found it absolutely impossible to keep my seat because I could not think of a word to say for myself and so I rose and walked hastily towards the cardroom resolving to stay with Mrs Mirvan the rest of the evening and not to dance at all But before I could find her Lord Orville saw and approached me
He begged to know if I was not well You may easily imagine how much I was embarrassed I made no answer but hung my head like a fool and looked on my fan
He then with an air the most respectfully serious asked if he had been so unhappy as to offend me
No indeed cried I and in hopes of changing the discourse and preventing his further inquiries I desired to know if he had seen the young lady who had been conversing with me
Nobut would I honour him with any commands to her
O by no means
Was there any other person with whom I wished to speak
I said no before I knew I had answered at all
Should he have the pleasure of bringing me any refreshment
I bowed almost involuntarily And away he flew
I was quite ashamed of being so troublesome and so much above myself as these seeming airs made me appear but indeed I was too much confused to think or act with any consistency
If he had not been as swift as lightning I dont know whether I should not have stolen away again but he returned in a moment When I had drank a glass of lemonade he hoped he said that I would again honour him with my hand as a new dance was just begun I had not the presence of mind to say a single word and so I let him once more lead me to the place I had left
Shocked to find how silly how childish a part I had acted my former fears of dancing before such a company and with such a partner returned more forcibly than ever I suppose he perceived my uneasiness for he entreated me to sit down again if dancing was disagreeable to me But I was quite satisfied with the folly I had already shewn and therefore declined his offer though I was really scarce able to stand
Under such conscious disadvantages you may easily imagine my dear Sir how ill I acquitted myself But though I both expected and deserved to find him very much mortified and displeased at his ill fortune in the choice he had made yet to my very great relief he appeared to be even contented and very much assisted and encouraged me These people in high life have too much presence of mind I believe to seem disconcerted or out of humour however they may feel for had I been the person of the most consequence in the room I could not have met with more attention and respect
When the dance was over seeing me still very much flurried he led me to a seat saying that he would not suffer me to fatigue myself from politeness
And then if my capacity or even if my spirits had been better in how animated a conversation I might have been engaged it was then I saw that the rank of Lord Orville was his least recommendation his understanding and his manners being far more distinguished His remarks upon the company in general were so apt so just so lively I am almost surprised myself that they did not reanimate me but indeed I was too well convinced of the ridiculous part I had myself played before so nice an observer to be able to enjoy his pleasantry so selfcompassion gave me feeling for others Yet I had not the courage to attempt either to defend them or to rally in my turn but listened to him in silent embarrassment
When he found this he changed the subject and talked of public places and public performers but he soon discovered that I was totally ignorant of them
He then very ingeniously turned the discourse to the amusements and occupations of the country
It now struck me that he was resolved to try whether or not I was capable of talking upon any subject This put so great a restraint upon my thoughts that I was unable to go further than a monosyllable and not ever so far when I could possibly avoid it
We were sitting in this manner he conversing with all gaiety I looking down with all foolishness when that fop who had first asked me to dance with a most ridiculous solemnity approached and after a profound bow or two said I humbly beg pardon Madamand of you too my Lordfor breaking in upon such agreeable conversationwhich must doubtless be more delectablethan what I have the honour to offerbut
I interrupted himI blush for my follywith laughing yet I could not help it for added to the mans stately foppishness and he actually took snuff between every three words when I looked around at Lord Orville I saw such extreme surprise in his facethe cause of which appeared so absurd that I could not for my life preserve my gravity
I had not laughed before from the time I had left Miss Mirvan and I had much better have cried then Lord Orville actually stared at me the beau I know not his name looked quite enraged RefrainMadam said he with an important air a few moments refrainI have but a sentence to trouble you withMay I know to what accident I must attribute not having the honour of your hand
Accident Sir repeated I much astonished
Yes accident Madamfor surelyI must take the liberty to observepardon me Madamit ought to be no common onethat should tempt a ladyso young a one tooto be guilty of illmanners
A confused idea now for the first time entered my head of something I had heard of the rules of an assembly but I was never at one beforeI have only danced at schooland so giddy and heedless I was that I had not once considered the impropriety of refusing one partner and afterwards accepting another I was thunderstruck at the recollection but while these thoughts were rushing into my head Lord Orville with some warmth said This Lady Sir is incapable of meriting such an accusation
The creaturefor I am very angry with himmade a low bow and with a grin the most malicious I ever saw My Lord said he far be it from me to accuse the lady for having the discernment to distinguish and preferthe superior attractions of your Lordship
Again he bowed and walked off
Was ever any thing so provoking I was ready to die with shame What a coxcomb exclaimed Lord Orville while I without knowing what I did rose hastily and moving off I cant imagine cried I where Mrs Mirvan has hid herself
Give me leave to see answered he I bowed and sat down again not daring to meet his eyes for what must he think of me between my blunder and the supposed preference
He returned in a moment and told me that Mrs Mirvan was at cards but would be glad to see me and I went immediately There was but one chair vacant so to my great relief Lord Orville presently left us I then told Mrs Mirvan my disasters and she goodnaturedly blamed herself for not having better instructed me but said she had taken it for granted that I must know such common customs However the man may I think be satisfied with his pretty speech and carry his resentment no farther
In a short time Lord Orville returned I consented with the best grace I could to go down another dance for I had had time to recollect myself and therefore resolved to use some exertion and if possible to appear less a fool than I had hitherto done for it occurred to me that insignificant as I was compared to a man of his rank and figure yet since he had been so unfortunate as to make choice of me for a partner why I should endeavour to make the best of it
The dance however was short and he spoke very little so I had no opportunity of putting my resolution in practice He was satisfied I suppose with his former successless efforts to draw me out or rather I fancied he had been inquiring who I was This again disconcerted me and the spirits I had determined to exert again failed me Tired ashamed and mortified I begged to sit down till we returned home which I did soon after Lord Orville did me the honour to hand me to the coach talking all the way of the honour I had done him O these fashionable people
Well my dear Sir was it not a strange evening I could not help being thus particular because to me every thing is so new But it is now time to conclude I am with all love and duty your EVELINA
LETTER XII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Tuesday April 5
THERE is to be no end to the troubles of last night I have this moment between persuasion and laughter gathered from Maria the most curious dialogue that ever I heard You will at first be startled at my vanity but my dear Sir have patience
It must have passed while I was sitting with Mrs Mirvan in the cardroom Maria was taking some refreshment and saw Lord Orville advancing for the same purpose himself but he did not know her though she immediately recollected him Presently after a very gaylooking man stepping hastily up to him cried Why my Lord what have you done with your lovely partner
Nothing answered Lord Orville with a smile and a shrug
By Jove cried the man she is the most beautiful creature I ever saw in my life
Lord Orville as he well might laughed but answered Yes a pretty modestlooking girl
O my Lord cried the madman she is an angel
A silent one returned he
Why ay my Lord how stands she as to that She looks all intelligence and expression
A poor weak girl answered Lord Orville shaking his head
By Jove cried the other I am glad to hear it
At that moment the same odious creature who had been my former tormentor joined them Addressing Lord Orville with great respect he said I beg pardon my Lordif I wasas I fear might be the caserather too severe in my censure of the lady who is honoured with your protectionbut my Lord illbreeding is apt to provoke a man
Illbreeding cried my unknown champion impossible that elegant face can never be so vile a mask
O Sir as to that answered he you must allow me to judge for though I pay all deference to your opinionin other thingsyet I hope you will grantand I appeal to your Lordship alsothat I am not totally despicable as a judge of good or illmanners
I was so wholly ignorant said Lord Orville gravely of the provocation you might have had that I could not but be surprised at your singular resentment
It was far from my intention answered he to offend your lordship but really for a person who is nobody to give herself such airsI own I could not command my passion For my Lord though I have made diligent inquiryI cannot learn who she is
By what I can make out cried my defender she must be a country parsons daughter
He he he very good pon honour cried the fopwell so I could have sworn by her manners
And then delighted at his own wit he laughed and went away as I suppose to repeat it
But what the deuce is all this demanded the other
Why a very foolish affair answered Lord Orville your Helen first refused this coxcomb and thendanced with me This is all I can gather of it
O Orville returned he you are a happy manBut illbred I can never believe it And she looks too sensible to be ignorant
Whether ignorant or mischievous I will not pretend to determine but certain it is she attended to all I could say to her though I have really fatigued myself with fruitless endeavours to entertain her with the most immovable gravity but no sooner did Lovel begin his complaint than she was seized with a fit of laughing first affronting the poor beau and then enjoying his mortification
Ha ha ha why there is some genius in that my Lord perhaps ratherrustic
Here Maria was called to dance and so heard no more
Now tell me my dear Sir did you ever know any thing more provoking A poor weak girl ignorant or mischievous What mortifying words I am resolved however that I will never again be tempted to go to an assembly I wish I had been in Dorsetshire
Well after this you will not be surprised that Lord Orville contented himself with an inquiry after our healths this morning by his servant without troubling himself to call as Miss Mirvan had told me he would but perhaps it may be only a country custom
I would not live here for the world I care not how soon we leave town London soon grows tiresome I wish the Captain would come Mrs Mirvan talks of the opera for this evening however I am very indifferent about it Wednesday Morning
Well my dear Sir I have been pleased against my will I could almost say for I must own I went out in very ill humour which I think you cannot wonder at but the music and the singing were charming they soothed me into a pleasure the most grateful the best suited to my present disposition in the world I hope to persuade Mrs Mirvan to go again on Saturday I wish the opera was every night It is of all entertainments the sweetest and most delightful Some of the songs seemed to melt my very soul It was what they call a serious opera as the comic first singer was ill
Tonight we go to Ranelagh If any of those three gentlemen who conversed so freely about me should be therebut I wont think of it Thursday Morning
Well my dear Sir we went to Ranelagh It is a charming place and the brilliancy of the lights on my first entrance made me almost think I was in some enchanted castle or fairy palace for all looked like magic to me
The very first person I saw was Lord Orville I felt so confusedbut he did not see me After tea Mrs Mirvan being tired Maria and I walked round the room alone Then again we saw him standing by the orchestra We too stopt to hear a singer He bowed to me I courtesied and I am sure I coloured We soon walked on not liking our situation however he did not follow us and when we passed by the orchestra again he was gone Afterwards in the course of the evening we met him several times but he was always with some party and never spoke to us though whenever he chanced to meet my eyes he condescended to bow
I cannot but be hurt at the opinion he entertains of me It is true my own behaviour incurred ityet he is himself the most agreeable and seemingly the most amiable man in the world and therefore it is that I am grieved to be thought ill of by him for of whose esteem ought we to be ambitious if not of those who most merit our ownBut it is too late to reflect upon this now Well I cant help itHowever I think I have done with assemblies
This morning was destined for seeing sights auctions curious shops and so forth but my head ached and I was not in a humour to be amused and so I made them go without me though very unwillingly They are all kindness
And now I am sorry I did not accompany them for I know not what to do with myself I had resolved not to go to the play tonight but I believe I shall In short I hardly care whether I do or not
I thought I had done wrong Mrs Mirvan and Maria have been half the town over and so entertainedwhile I like a fool staid at home to do nothing And at the auction in Pallmall who should they meet but Lord Orville He sat next to Mrs Mirvan and they talked a great deal together but she gave me no account of the conversation
I may never have such another opportunity of seeing London I am quite sorry that I was not of the party but I deserve this mortification for having indulged my illhumour Thursday Night
We are just returned from the play which was King Lear and has made me very sad We did not see any body we knew
Well adieu it is too late to write more Friday
Captain Mirvan is arrived I have not spirits to give an account of his introduction for he has really shocked me I do not like him He seems to be surly vulgar and disagreeable
Almost the same moment that Maria was presented to him he began some rude jests upon the bad shape of her nose and called her a tall illformed thing She bore it with the utmost goodhumour but that kind and sweettempered woman Mrs Mirvan deserved a better lot I am amazed she would marry him
For my own part I have been so shy that I have hardly spoken to him or he to me I cannot imagine why the family was so rejoiced at his return If he had spent his whole life abroad I should have supposed they might rather have been thankful than sorrowful However I hope they do not think so ill of him as I do At least I am sure they have too much prudence to make it known Saturday Night
We have been to the opera and I am still more pleased than I was on Tuesday I could have thought myself in Paradise but for the continual talking of the company around me We sat in the pit where every body was dressed in so high a style that if I had been less delighted with the performance my eyes would have found me sufficient entertainment from looking at the ladies
I was very glad I did not sit next the Captain for he could not bear the music or singers and was extremely gross in his observations of both When the opera was over we went into a place called the coffeeroom where ladies as well as gentlemen assemble There are all sorts of refreshments and the company walk about and chat with the same ease and freedom as in a private room
On Monday we go to a ridotto and on Wednesday we return to Howard Grove The Captain says he wont stay here to be smoked with filth any longer but having been seven years smoked with a burning sun he will retire to the country and sink into a fair weather chap Adieu my dear Sir
LETTER XIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Tuesday April 12 My dear Sir
WE came home from the ridotto so late or rather so early that it was not possible for me to write Indeed we did not go you will be frightened to hear ittill past eleven oclock but no body does A terrible reverse of the order of nature We sleep with the sun and wake with the moon
The room was very magnificent the lights and decorations were brilliant and the company gay and splendid But I should have told you that I made many objections to being of the party according to the resolution I had formed However Maria laughed me out of my scruples and so once again I went to an assembly
Miss Mirvan danced a minuet but I had not the courage to follow her example In our walks I saw Lord Orville He was quite alone but did not observe us Yet as he seemed of no party I thought it was not impossible that he might join us and though I did not wish much to dance at allyet as I was more acquainted with him than with any other person in the room I must own I could not help thinking it would be infinitely more desirable to dance again with him than with an entire stranger To be sure after all that had passed it was very ridiculous to suppose it even probable that Lord Orville would again honour me with his choice yet I am compelled to confess my absurdity by way of explaining what follows
Miss Mirvan was soon engaged and presently after a very fashionable gay looking man who seemed about thirty years of age addressed himself to me and begged to have the honour of dancing with me Now Marias partner was a gentleman of Mrs Mirvans acquaintance for she had told us it was highly improper for young women to dance with strangers at any public assembly Indeed it was by no means my wish so to do yet I did not like to confine myself from dancing at all neither did I dare refuse this gentleman as I had done Mr Lovel and then if any acquaintance should offer accept him and so all these reasons combining induced me to tell himyet I blush to write it to youthat I was already engaged by which I meant to keep myself at liberty to a dance or not as matters should fall out
I suppose my consciousness betrayed my artifice for he looked at me as if incredulous and instead of being satisfied with my answer and leaving me according to my expectation he walked at my side and with the greatest ease imaginable began a conversation in the free style which only belongs to old and intimate acquaintance But what was most provoking he asked me a thousand questions concerning the partner to whom I was engaged And at last he said Is it really possible that a man whom you have honoured with your acceptance can fail to be at hand to profit from your goodness
I felt extremely foolish and begged Mrs Mirvan to lead to a seat which she very obligingly did The Captain sat next her and to my great surprise this gentleman thought proper to follow and seat himself next to me
What an insensible continued he why Madam you are missing the most delightful dance in the worldThe man must be either mad or a foolWhich do you incline to think him yourself
Neither Sir answered I in some confusion
He begged my pardon for the freedom of his supposition saying I really was off my guard from astonishment that any man can be so much and so unaccountably his own enemy But where Madam can he possibly behas he left the roomor has not he been in it
Indeed Sir said I peevishly I know nothing of him
I dont wonder that you are disconcerted Madam it is really very provoking The best part of the evening will be absolutely lost He deserves not that you should wait for him
I do not Sir said I and I beg you not to
Mortifying indeed Madam interrupted he a lady to wait for a gentlemanO fiecareless fellowWhat can detain himWill you give me leave to seek him
If you please Sir answered I quite terrified lest Mrs Mirvan should attend to him for she looked very much surprised at seeing me enter into conversation with a stranger
With all my heart cried he pray what coat has he on
Indeed I never looked at it
Out upon him cried he What did he address you in a coat not worth looking atWhat a shabby wretch
How ridiculous I really could not help laughing which I fear encouraged him for he went on
Charming creatureand can you really bear ill usage with so much sweetness Can you like patience on a monument smile in the midst of disappointment For my part though I am not the offended person my indignation is so great that I long to kick the fellow round the roomunless indeedhesitating and looking earnestly at me unless indeedit is a partner of your own creating
I was dreadfully abashed and could not make an answer
But no cried he again and with warmth It cannot be that you are so cruel Softness itself is painted in your eyesYou could not surely have the barbarity so wantonly to trifle with my misery
I turned away from this nonsense with real disgust Mrs Mirvan saw my confusion but was perplexed what to think of it and I could not explain to her the cause lest the Captain should hear me I therefore proposed to walk she consented and we all rose but would you believe it this man had the assurance to rise too and walk close by my side as if of my party
Now cried he I hope we shall see this ingrateIs that hepointing to an old man who was lame or that And in this manner he asked me of whoever was old or ugly in the room I made no sort of answer and when he found that I was resolutely silent and walked on as much as I could without observing him he suddenly stamped his foot and cried out in a passion Fool idiot booby
I turned hastily toward him O Madam continued he forgive my vehemence but I am distracted to think there should exist a wretch who can slight a blessing for which I would forfeit my lifeO that I could but meet him I would soonBut I grow angry pardon me Madam my passions are violent and your injuries affect me
I began to apprehend he was a madman and stared at him with the utmost astonishment I see you are moved Madam said he generous creaturebut dont be alarmed I am cool again I am indeedupon my soul I amI entreat you most lovely of mortals I intreat you to be easy
Indeed Sir said I very seriously I must insist upon your leaving me you are quite a stranger to me and I am both unused and averse to your language and your manners
This seemed to have some effect on him He made me a low bow begged my pardon and vowed he would not for the world offend me
Then Sir you must leave me cried I I am gone Madam I am gone with a most tragical air and he marched away at a quick pace out of sight in a moment but before I had time to congratulate myself he was again at my elbow
And could you really let me go and not be sorryCan you see me suffer torments inexpressible and yet retain all your favour for that miscreant who flies youUngrateful puppyI could bastinado him
For Heavens sake my dear cried Mrs Mirvan who is he talking of
IndeedI do not know Madam said I but I wish he would leave me
Whats all that there cried the Captain
The man made a low bow and said Only Sir a slight objection which this young lady makes to dancing with me and which I am endeavouring to obviate I shall think myself greatly honoured if you will intercede for me
That lady Sir said the Captain coldly is her own mistress And he walked sullenly on
You Madam said the man who looked delighted to Mrs Mirvan
You I hope will have the goodness to speak for me
Sir answered she gravely I have not the pleasure of being acquainted with you
I hope when you have Maam cried he undaunted you will honour me with your approbation but while I am yet unknown to you it would be truly generous in you to countenance me and I flatter myself Madam that you will not have cause to repent it
Mrs Mirvan with an embarrassed air replied I do not at all mean
Sir to doubt your being a gentlemanbut
But what Madamthat doubt removed why a but
Well Sir said Mrs Mirvan with a good humoured smile I will even treat you with your own plainness and try what effect that will have on you I must therefore tell you once for all
O pardon me Madam interrupted he eagerly you must not proceed with those words once for all no if I have been too plain and though a man deserve a rebuke remember dear ladies that if you copy you ought in justice to excuse me
We both stared at the mans strange behaviour
Be nobler than your sex continued he turning to me honour me with one dance and give up the ingrate who has merited so ill your patience
Mrs Mirvan looked with astonishment at us both
Who does he speak of my dearyou never mentioned
O Madam exclaimed he he was not worth mentioningit is a pity he was ever though of but let us forget his existence One dance is all I solicit Permit me Madam the honour of this young ladys hand it will be a favour I shall ever most gratefully acknowledge
Sir answered she favours and strangers have with me no connection
If you have hitherto said he confined your benevolence to your intimate friends suffer me to be the first for whom your charity is enlarged
Well Sir I know not what to say to youbut
He stopt her but with so many urgent entreaties that she at last told me I must either go down one dance or avoid his importunities by returning home I hesitated which alternative to chose but this impetuous man at length prevailed and I was obliged to consent to dance with him
And thus was my deviation from truth punished and thus did this mans determined boldness conquer
During the dance before we were too much engaged in it for conversation he was extremely provoking about my partner and tried every means in his power to make me own that I had deceived him which though I would not so far humble myself as to acknowledge was indeed but too obvious
Lord Orville I fancy did not dance at all He seemed to have a large acquaintance and joined several different parties but you will easily suppose I was not much pleased to see him in a few minutes after I was gone walk towards the place I had just left and bow to and join Mrs Mirvan
How unlucky I thought myself that I had not longer withstood this strangers importunities The moment we had gone down the dance I was hastening away from him but he stopt me and said that I could by no means return to my party without giving offence before we had done our duty of walking up the dance As I know nothing at all of these rules and customs I was obliged to submit to his directions but I fancy I looked rather uneasy for he took notice of my inattention saying in his free way Whence that anxietyWhy are those lovely eyes perpetually averted
I wish you would say no more to me Sir cried I peevishly you have already destroyed all my happiness for this evening
Good Heaven What is it I have doneHow have I merited this scorn
You have tormented me to death you have forced me from my friends and intruded yourself upon me against my will for a partner
Surely my dear Madam we ought to be better friends since there seems to be something of sympathy in the frankness of our dispositionsAnd yet were you not an angelhow do you think I could brooke such contempt
If I have offended you cried I you have but to leave meand O how I wish you would
My dear creature said he half laughing why where could you be educated
Where I most sincerely wish I now was
How conscious you must be all beautiful that you are that those charming airs serve only to heighten the bloom of your complexion
Your freedom Sir where you are more acquainted may perhaps be less disagreeable but to me
You do me justice cried he interrupting me yes I do indeed improve upon acquaintance you will hereafter be quite charmed with me
Hereafter Sir I hope I shall never
O hushhushhave you forgot the situation in which I found youHave you forgot that when deserted I pursued youwhen betrayed I adored youbut for me
But for you Sir I might perhaps have been happy
What then am I to conclude that but for me your partner would have appearedpoor fellowand did my presence awe him
I wish his presence Sir could awe you
His presenceperhaps then you see him
Perhaps Sir I do cried I quite wearied of his raillery
Where Wherefor Heavens sake show me the wretch
Wretch Sir
O a very savagea sneaking shamefaced despicable puppy
I know not what bewitched mebut my pride was hurt and my spirits were tired andin short I had the folly looking at Lord Orville to repeat Despicable you think
His eyes instantly followed mine Why is that the gentleman
I made no answer I could not affirm and I would not denyfor I hoped to be relieved from his teasing by his mistake
The very moment we had done what he called our duty I eagerly desired to return to Mrs Mirvan
To your partner I presume Madam said he very gravely
This quite confounded me I dreaded lest this mischievous man ignorant of his rank should address himself to Lord Orville and say something which might expose my artifice Fool to involve myself in such difficulties I now feared what I had before wished and therefore to avoid Lord Orville I was obliged myself to propose going down another dance though I was ready to sink with shame while I spoke
But your partner Maam said he affecting a very solemn air perhaps he may resent my detaining you if you will give me leave to ask his consent
Not for the universe
Who is he Madam
I wished myself a hundred miles off He repeated his question
What is his name
NothingnobodyI dont know
He assumed a most important solemnity Hownot knowGive me leave my dear Madam to recommend this caution to you Never dance in public with a strangerwith one whose name you are unacquainted withwho may be a mere adventurera man of no character consider to what impertinence you may expose yourself
Was ever anything so ridiculous I could not help laughing in spite of my vexation
At this instant Mrs Mirvan followed by Lord Orville walked up to us You will easily believe it was not difficult for me to recover my gravity but what was my consternation when this strange man destined to be the scourge of my artifice exclaimed Ha My Lord OrvilleI protest I did not know your Lordship What can I say for my usurpationYet faith my Lord such a prize was not to be neglected
My shame and confusion were unspeakable Who could have supposed or foreseen that this man knew Lord Orville But falsehood is not more unjustifiable than unsafe
Lord Orvillewell he mightlooked all amazement
The philosophic coldness of your Lordship continued this odious creature every man is not endowed with I have used my utmost endeavours to entertain this lady though I fear without success and your lordship will not be a little flattered if acquainted with the difficulty which attended my procuring the honour of only one dance Then turning to me who was sinking with shame while Lord Orville stood motionless and Mrs Mirvan astonishedhe suddenly seized my hand saying Think my Lord what must be my reluctance to resign this fair hand to your Lordship
In the same instant Lord Orville took it of him I coloured violently and made an effort to recover it You do me too much honour Sir cried he with an air of gallantry pressing it to his lips before he let it go however I shall be happy to profit by it if this lady turning to Mrs Mirvan will permit me to seek for her party
To compel him thus to dance I could not endure and eagerly called out By no meansnot for the worldI must beg
Will you honour me Madam with your commands cried my tormentor may I seek the ladys party
No Sir answered I turning from him
What shall be done my dear said Mrs Mirvan
Nothing Maamanything I mean
But do you dance or not you see his Lordship waits
I hope notI beg thatI would not for the worldI am sure I ought toto
I could not speak but that confident man determining to discover whether or not I had deceived him said to Lord Orville who stood suspended My Lord this affair which at present seems perplexed I will briefly explainthis lady proposed to me another dancenothing could have made me more happyI only wished for your Lordships permission which if now granted will I am persuaded set everything right
I glowed with indignation No Sirit is your absence and that alone can set everything right
For Heavens sake my dear cried Mrs Mirvan who could no longer contain her surprise what does all this meanwere you preengagedhad Lord Orville
No Madam cried I onlyonly I did not know that gentlemanand soand so I thoughtI intendedI
Overpowered by all that had passed I had not strength to make my mortifying explanationmy spirits quite failed me and I burst into tears
They all seemed shocked and amazed
What is the matter my dearest love cried Mrs Mirvan with kindest concern
What have I done exclaimed my evil genius and ran officiously for a glass of water
However a hint was sufficient for Lord Orville who comprehended all I would have explained He immediately led me to a seat and said in a low voice Be not distressed I beseech you I shall ever think my name honoured by your making use of it
This politeness relieved me A general murmur had alarmed Miss Mirvan who flew instantly to me while Lord Orville the moment Mrs Mirvan had taken the water led my tormentor away
For Heavens sake dear Madam cried I let me go homeindeed I cannot stay here any longer
Let us all go cried my kind Maria
But the Captain what will he sayI had better go home in a chair
Mrs Mirvan consented and I rose to depart Lord Orville and that man both came to me The first with an attention I but illmerited from him led me to a chair while the other followed pestering me with apologies I wished to have made mine to Lord Orville but was too much ashamed
It was about one oclock Mrs Mirvans servants saw me home
And nowwhat again shall ever tempt me to an assembly I dread to hear what you will think of me my most dear and honoured Sir you will need your utmost partiality to receive me without displeasure
This morning Lord Orville has sent to inquire after our health and Sir Clement Willoughby for that I find is the name of my persecutor has called but I would not go down stairs till he was gone
And now my dear Sir I can somewhat account for the strange provoking and ridiculous conduct of this Sir Clement last night for Miss Mirvan says he is the very man with whom she heard Lord Orville conversing at Mrs Stanleys when I was spoken of in so mortifying a manner He was pleased to say he was glad to hear I was a fool and therefore I suppose he concluded he might talk as much nonsense as he pleased to me however I am very indifferent as to his opinionbut for Lord Orvilleif then he thought me an idiot now I am sure he must suppose me both bold and presuming Make use of his namewhat impertinencehe can never know how it happenedhe can only imagine it was from an excess of vanitywell however I shall leave this bad city tomorrow and never again will I enter it
The Captain intends to take us tonight to the Fantoccini I cannot bear that Captain I can give you no idea how gross he is I heartily rejoice that he was not present at the disagreeable conclusion of yesterdays adventure for I am sure he would have contributed to my confusion which might perhaps have diverted him as he seldom or never smiles but at some other persons expense
And here I conclude my London lettersand without any regret for I am too inexperienced and ignorant to conduct myself with propriety in this town where everything is new to me and many things are unaccountable and perplexing
Adieu my dear Sir Heaven restore me safely to you I wish I was to go immediately to Berry Hill yet the wish is ungrateful to Mrs Mirvan and therefore I will repress it I shall write an account of the Fantoccini from Howard Grove We have not been to half the public places that are now open though I dare say you will think we have been to all But they are almost as innumerable as the persons who fill them
LETTER XIV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Queen Ann Street April 13
HOW much will you be surprised my dearest Sir at receiving another letter from London of your Evelinas writing But believe me it was not my fault neither is it my happiness that I am still here our journey has been postponed by an accident equally unexpected and disagreeable
We went last night to see the Fantoccini where we had infinite entertainment from the performance of a little comedy in French and Italian by puppets so admirably managed that they both astonished and diverted us all except the Captain who has a fixed and most prejudiced hatred of whatever is not English
When it was over while we waited for the coach a tall elderly woman brushed quickly past us calling out My God what shall I do
Why what would you do cried the Captain
Ma foi Monsieur answered she I have lost my company and in this place I dont know nobody
There was something foreign in her accent though it was difficult to discover whether she was an English or a French woman She was very well dressed and seemed so entirely at a loss what to do that Mrs Mirvan proposed to the Captain to assist her
Assist her cried he ay with all my heartlet a linkboy call her a coach
There was not one to be had and it rained very fast
Mon Dieu exclaimed the stranger what shall become of me Je suis au desespoir
Dear Sir cried Miss Mirvan pray let us take the poor lady into our coach She is quite alone and a foreigner
Shes never the better for that answered he she may be a woman of the town for anything you know
She does not appear such said Mrs Mirvan and indeed she seems so much distressed that we shall but follow the golden rule if we carry her to her lodgings
You are mighty fond of new acquaintance returned he but first let us know if she be going our way
Upon inquiry we found that she lived in Oxford Road and after some disputing the Captain surlily and with a very bad grace consented to admit her into his coach though he soon convinced us that he was determined she should not be too much obliged to him for he seemed absolutely bent upon quarrelling with her for which strange inhospitality I can assign no other reason than that she appeared to be a foreigner
The conversation began by her telling us that she had been in England only two days that the gentlemen belonging to her were Parisians and had left her to see for a hackneycoach as her own carriage was abroad and that she had waited for them till she was quite frightened and concluded that they had lost themselves
And pray said the Captain why did you go to a public place without an Englishman
Ma foi Sir answered she because none of my acquaintance is in town
Why then said he Ill tell you what your best way is to go out of it yourself
Pardi Monsieur returned she and so I shall for I promise you I think the English a parcel of brutes and Ill go back to France as fast as I can for I would not live among none of you
Who wants you cried the Captain do you suppose Madam French we have not enough of other nations to pick our pockets already Ill warrant you theres no need for you for to put in your oar
Pick your pockets Sir I wish nobody wanted to pick your pockets no more than I do and Ill promise you youd be safe enough But theres no nation under the sun can beat the English for illpoliteness for my part I hate the very sight of them and so I shall only just visit a person of quality or two of my particular acquaintance and then I shall go back again to France
Ay do cried he and then go to the devil together for thats the fittest voyage for the French and the quality
Well take care however cried the stranger with great vehemence not to admit none of your vulgar unmannered English among us
O never fear returned he coolly we shant dispute the point with you you and the quality may have the devil all to yourselves
Desirous of changing the subject of a conversation which now became very alarming Miss Mirvan called out Lord how slow the man drives
Never mind Moll said her father Ill warrant you hell drive fast enough tomorrow when you are going to Howard Grove
To Howard Grove exclaimed the stranger why mon Dieu do you know Lady Howard
Why what if we do answered he thats nothing to you shes none of your quality Ill promise you
Who told you that cried she you dont know nothing about the matter besides youre the illbredest person ever I see and as to your knowing Lady Howard I dont believe no such a thing unless indeed you are her steward
The Captain swearing terribly said with great fury You would much sooner be taken for her washwoman
Her washwoman indeedHa ha ha why you hant no eyes did you ever see a washwoman in such a gown as thisBesides Im no such mean person for Im as good as Lady Howard and as rich too and besides Im now come to England to visit her
You may spare yourself that there trouble said the Captain she has paupers enough about her already
Paupers Misterno more a pauper than yourself nor so much neitherbut you are a low dirty fellow and I shant stoop to take no more notice of you
Dirty fellow exclaimed the Captain seizing both her wrists hark you Mrs Frog youd best hold your tongue for I must make bold to tell you if you dont that I shall make no ceremony of tripping you out of the window and there you may lie in the mud till some of your Monseers come to help you out of it
Their increasing passion quite terrified us and Mrs Mirvan was beginning to remonstrate with the Captain when we were all silenced by what follows
Let me go villain that you are let me go or Ill promise you Ill get you put to prison for this usage Im no common person I assure you and ma foi Ill go to Justice Fielding about you for Im a person of fashion and Ill make you know it or my name ant Duval
I heard no more amazed frightened and unspeakably shocked an involuntary exclamation of Gracious Heaven escaped me and more dead than alive I sunk into Mrs Mirvans arms But let me draw a veil over a scene too cruel for a heart so compassionately tender as yours it is sufficient that you know this supposed foreigner proved to be Madame Duvalthe grandmother of your Evelina
O Sir to discover so near a relation in a woman who had thus introduced herselfwhat would become of me were it not for you my protector my friend and my refuge
My extreme concern and Mrs Mirvans surprise immediately betrayed me But I will not shock you with the manner of her acknowledging me or the bitterness the grossness I cannot otherwise express myselfwith which she spoke of those unhappy past transactions you have so pathetically related to me All the misery of a much injured parent dear though never seen regretted though never known crowded so forcibly upon my memory that they rendered this interviewone only exceptedthe most afflicting I can ever know
When we stopt at her lodgings she desired me to accompany her into the house and said she could easily procure a room for me to sleep in Alarmed and trembling I turned to Mrs Mirvan My daughter Madam said that sweet woman cannot so abruptly part with her young friend you must allow a little time to wean them from each other
Pardon me Maam answered Madame Duval who from the time of her being known somewhat softened her manners Miss cant possibly be so nearly connected to this child as I am
No matter for that cried the Captain who espoused my cause to satisfy his own pique tho an awkward apology had passed between them she was sent to us and so dye see we dont choose for to part with her
I promised to wait upon her at what time she pleased the next day and after a short debate she desired me to breakfast with her and we proceeded to Queen Ann Street
What an unfortunate adventure I could not close my eyes the whole night A thousand times I wished I had never left Berry Hill however my return thither shall be accelerated to the utmost of my power and once more in that abode of tranquil happiness I will suffer no temptation to allure me elsewhere
Mrs Mirvan was so kind as to accompany me to Madame Duvals house this morning The Captain too offered his service which I declined from a fear she should suppose I meant to insult her
She frowned most terribly upon Mrs Mirvan but she received me with as much tenderness as I believe she is capable of feeling Indeed our meeting seems really to have affected her for when overcome by the variety of emotions which the sight of her occasioned I almost fainted in her arms she burst into tears and said let me not lose my poor daughter a second time This unexpected humanity softened me extremely but she very soon excited my warmest indignation by the ungrateful mention she made of the best of men my dear and most generous benefactor However grief and anger mutually gave way to terror upon her avowing the intention of her visiting England was to make me return with her to France This she said was a plan she had formed from the instant she had heard of my birth which she protested did not reach her ears till I must have been twelve years of age but Monsieur Duval who she declared was the worst husband in the world would not permit her to do any thing she wished he had been dead but three months which had been employed in arranging certain affairs that were no sooner settled than she set off for England She was already out of mourning for she said nobody here could tell how long she had been a widow
She must have been married very early in life what her age is I do not know but she really looks to be less than fifty She dresses very gaily paints very high and the traces of former beauty are still very visible in her face
I know not when or how this visit would have ended had not the Captain called for Mrs Mirvan and absolutely insisted upon my attending her He is become very suddenly so warmly my friend that I quite dread his officiousness Mrs Mirvan however whose principal study seems to be healing those wounds which her husband inflicts appeased Madame Duvals wrath by a very polite invitation to drink tea and spend the evening here Not without great difficulty was the Captain prevailed upon to defer his journey some time longer but what could be done It would have been indecent for me to have quitted town the very instant I discovered that Madame Duval was in it and to have staid here solely under her protectionMrs Mirvan thank Heaven was too kind for such a thought That she should follow us to Howard Grove I almost equally dreaded It is therefore determined that we remain in London for some days or a week though the Captain has declared that the old French hag as he is pleased to call her shall fare never the better for it
My only hope is to get safe to Berry Hill where counselled and sheltered by you I shall have nothing more to fear Adieu my ever dear and most honoured Sir I shall have no happiness till I am again with you
LETTER XV
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill April 16
IN the belief and hope that my Evelina would ere now have bid adieu to London I had intended to have deferred writing till I heard of her return to Howard Grove but the letter I have this moment received with intelligence of Madame Duvals arrival in England demands an immediate answer
Her journey hither equally grieves and alarms me How much did I pity my child when I read of a discovery at once so unexpected and unwished I have long dreaded this meeting and its consequence to claim you seems naturally to follow acknowledging you I am well acquainted with her disposition and have for many years foreseen the contest which now threatens us
Cruel as are the circumstances of this affair you must not my love suffer it to depress your spirits remember that while life is lent me I will devote it to your service and for future time I will make such provisions as shall seem to me most conducive to your future happiness Secure of my protection and relying on my tenderness let no apprehensions of Madame Duval disturb your peace conduct yourself towards her with all the respect and deference due to so near a relation remembering always that the failure of duty on her part can by no means justify any neglect on yours Indeed the more forcibly you are struck with improprieties and misconduct in another the greater should be your observance and diligence to avoid even the shadow of similar errors Be careful therefore that no remissness of attention no indifference of obliging make known to her the independence I assure you of but when she fixes the time for her leaving England trust to me the task of refusing your attending her disagreeable to myself I own it will be yet to you it would be improper if not impossible
In regard to her opinion of me I am more sorry than surprised at her determined blindness the palliation which she feels the want of for her own conduct leads her to seek for failings in all who were concerned in those unhapppy transactions which she has so much reason to lament And this as it is the cause so we must in some measure consider it as the excuse of her inveteracy
How grateful to me are your wishes to return to Berry Hill Your lengthened stay in London and the dissipation in which I find you are involved fill me with uneasiness I mean not however that I would have you sequester yourself from the party to which you belong since Mrs Mirvan might thence infer a reproof which your youth and her kindness would render inexcusable I will not therefore enlarge upon this subject but content myself with telling you that I shall heartily rejoice when I hear of your safe arrival at Howard Grove for which place I hope you will be preparing at the time you receive this letter
I cannot too much thank you my best Evelina for the minuteness of your communications Continue to me this indulgence for I should be miserable if in ignorance of your proceedings
How new to you is the scene of life in which you are engagedballsplaysoperasridottosAh my child At your return hither how will you bear the change My heart trembles for your future tranquilityYet I will hope every thing from the unsullied whiteness of your soul and the native liveliness of your disposition
I am sure I need not say how much more I was pleased with the mistakes of your inexperience at the private ball than with the attempted adoption of more fashionable manners at the ridotto But your confusion and mortifications were such as to entirely silence all reproofs on my part
I hope you will see no more of Sir Clement Willoughby whose conversation and boldness are extremely disgustful to me I was gratified by the good nature of Lord Orville upon your making use of his name but I hope you will never again put it to such a trial
Heaven bless thee my dear child And grant that neither misfortune nor vice may ever rob thee of that gaiety of heart which resulting from innocence while it constitutes your own contributes also to the felicity of all who know you ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER XVI
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Queen Ann Street Thursday morning
April 14
BEFORE our dinner was over yesterday Madame Duval came to tea though it will lessen your surprise to hear that it was near five oclock for we never dine till the day is almost over She was asked into another room while the table was cleared and then was invited to partake of the dessert
She was attended by a French gentleman whom she introduced by the name of Monsieur Du Bois Mrs Mirvan received them both with her usual politeness but the Captain looked very much displeased and after a short silence very sternly said to Madame Duval Pray who asked you to bring that there spark with you
O cried she I never go no where without him
Another short silence ensued which was terminated by the Captains turning roughly to the foreigner and saying Do you know Monseer that you are the first Frenchman I ever let come into my house
Monsieur Du Bois made a profound bow He speaks no English and understands it so imperfectly that he might possibly imagine he had received a compliment
Mrs Mirvan endeavourd to divert the Captains illhumour by starting new subjects but he left to her all the trouble of supporting them and leant back in his chair in gloomy silence except when any opportunity offered of uttering some sarcasm upon the French Finding her efforts to render the evening agreeable were fruitless Mrs Mirvan proposed a party to Ranelagh Madame Duval joyfully consented to it and the Captain though he railed against the dissipation of the women did not oppose it and therefore Maria and I ran up stairs to dress ourselves
Before we were ready word was brought us that Sir Clement Willoughby was in the drawingroom He introduced himself under the pretence of inquiring after all our healths and entered the room with the easy air of an old acquaintance though Mrs Mirvan confessed that he seemed embarrassed when he found how coldly he was received not only by the Captain but by herself
I was extremely disconcerted at the thoughts of seeing this man again and did not go downstairs till I was called to tea He was then deeply engaged in a discourse upon French manners with Madame Duval and the Captain and the subject seemed so entirely to engross him that he did not at first observe my entrance into the room Their conversation was supported with great vehemence the Captain roughly maintaining the superiority of the English in every particular and Madame Duval warmly refusing to allow of it in any while Sir Clement exerted all his powers of argument and of ridicule to second and strengthen whatever was advanced by the Captain for he had the sagacity to discover that he could take no method so effectual for making the master of the house his friend as to make Madame Duval his enemy and indeed in a very short time he had reason to congratulate himself upon his successful discernment
As soon as he saw me he made a most respectful bow and hoped I had not suffered from the fatigue of the ridotto I made no other answer than a slight inclination of the head for I was very much ashamed of that whole affair He then returned to the disputants where he managed the argument so skilfully at once provoking Madame Duval and delighting the Captain that I could not forbear admiring his address though I condemned his subtlety Mrs Mirvan dreading such violent antagonists attempted frequently to change the subject and she might have succeeded but for the interposition of Sir Clement who would not suffer it to be given up and supported it with such humour and satire that he seems to have won the Captains heart though their united forces so enraged and overpowered Madame Duval that she really trembled with passion
I was very glad when Mrs Mirvan said it was time to be gone Sir Clement arose to take leave but the Captain very cordially invited him to join our party he had an engagement he said but would give it up to have that pleasure
Some little confusion ensued in regard to our manner of setting off Mrs Mirvan offered Madame Duval a place in her coach and proposed that we four females should go all together however this she rejected declaring she would by no means go so far without a gentleman and wondering so polite a lady could make so English a proposal Sir Clement Willoughby said his chariot was waiting at the door and begged to know if it could be of any use It was at last decided that a hackneycoach should be called for Monsieur Du Bois and Madame Duval in which the Captain and at his request Sir Clement went also Mrs and Miss Mirvan and I had a peaceful and comfortable ride by ourselves
I doubt not but they quarrelled all the way for when we met at Ranelagh every one seemed out of humour and though we joined parties poor Madame Duval was avoided as much as possible by all but me
The room was so very much crowded that but for the uncommon assiduity of Sir Clement Willoughby we should not have been able to procure a box which is the name given to the arched recesses that are appropriated for teaparties till half the company had retired As we were taking possession of our places some ladies of Mrs Mirvans acquaintance stopped to speak to her and persuaded her to take a round with them When she returned to us what was my surprise to see that Lord Orville had joined her party The ladies walked on Mrs Mirvan seated herself and made a slight though respectful invitation to Lord Orville to drink his tea with us which to my no small consternation he accepted
I felt a confusion unspeakable at again seeing him from the recollection of the ridotto adventure nor did my situation lessen it for I was seated between Madame Duval and Sir Clement who seemed as little as myself to desire Lord Orvilles presence Indeed the continual wrangling and illbreeding of Captain Mirvan and Madame Duval made me blush that I belonged to them And poor Mrs Mirvan and her amiable daughter had still less reason to be satisfied
A general silence ensued after he was seated his appearance from different motives gave an universal restraint to every body What his own reasons were for honouring us with his company I cannot imagine unless indeed he had a curiosity to know whether I should invent any new impertinence concerning him
The first speech was made by Madame Duval who said Its quite a shocking thing to see ladies come to so genteel a place as Ranelagh with hats on it has a monstrous vulgar look I cant think what they wear them for There is no such a thing to be seen in Paris
Indeed cried Sir Clement I must own myself no advocate for hats I am sorry the ladies ever invented or adopted so tantalizing a fashion for where there is beauty they only serve to shade it and where there is none to excite a most unavailing curiosity I fancy they were originally worn by some young and whimsical coquette
More likely answered the Captain they were invented by some wrinkled old hag whod a mind for to keep the young fellows in chace let them be never so weary
I dont know what you may do in England cried Madame Duval but I know in Paris no woman neednt be at such a trouble as that to be taken very genteel notice of
Why will you pretend for to say returned the Captain that they dont distinguish the old from the young there as well as here
They dont make no distinguishments at all said she theyre vastly too polite
More fools they cried the Captain sneeringly
Would to Heaven cried Sir Clement that for our own sakes we Englishmen too were blest with so accommodating a blindness
Why the devil do you make such a prayer as that demanded the Captain them are the first foolish words Ive heard you speak but I suppose youre not much used to that sort of work Did you ever make a prayer before since you were a sniveler
Ay now cried Madame Duval thats another of the unpolitenesses of you English to go to talking of such things as that now in Paris nobody never says nothing about religion no more than about politics
Why then answered he its a sign they take no more care of their souls than of their country and so both one and tother go to old Nick
Well if they do said she whos the worse so long as they dont say nothing about it Its the tiresomest thing in the world to be always talking of them sort of things and nobody thats ever been abroad troubles their heads about them
Pray then cried the Captain since you know so much of the matter be so good as to tell us what they do trouble their heads aboutHey Sir Clement hant we a right to know that much
A very comprehensive question said Sir Clement and I expect much instruction from the ladys answer
Come Madam continued the Captain never flinch speak at once dont stop for thinking
I assure you I am not going answered she for as to what they do do why theyve enough to do I promise you what with one thing or another
But what what do they do these famous Monseers demanded the Captain cant you tell us do they gameor drinkor fiddleor are they jockeysor do they spend all their time in flummering old women
As to that Sirbut indeed I shant trouble myself to answer such a parcel of low questions so dont ask me no more about it And then to my great vexation turning to Lord Orville she said Pray Sir was you ever in Paris
He only bowed
And pray Sir how did you like it
This comprehensive question as Sir Clement would have called it though it made him smile also made him hesitate however his answer was expressive of his approbation
I thought you would like it Sir because you look so like a gentleman As to the Captain and as to that other gentleman why they may very well not like what they dont know for I suppose Sir you was never abroad
Only three years Maam answered Sir Clement drily
Well thats very surprising I should never have thought it however
I dare say you only kept company with the English
Why pray who should he keep company with cried the Captain what I suppose youd have him ashamed of his own nation like some other people not a thousand miles off on purpose to make his own nation ashamed of him
Im sure it would be a very good thing if youd go abroad yourself
How will you make out that hey Madam come please to tell me where would be the good of that
Where why a great deal Theyd make quite another person of you
What I suppose youd have me to learn to cut capersand dress like a monkeyand palaver in French gibberishhey would youAnd powder and daub and make myself up like some other folks
I would have you learn to be more politer Sir and not to talk to ladies in such a rude oldfashion way as this You Sir as have been in Paris again addressing herself to Lord Orville can tell this English gentleman how hed be despised if he was to talk in such an ungenteel manner as this before any foreigners Why there isnt a hairdresser nor a shoemaker nor nobody that wouldnt blush to be in your company
Why look ye Madam answered the Captain as to your hairpinchers and shoeblacks you may puff off their manners and welcome and I am heartily glad you like em so well but as to me since you must needs make so free of your advice I must een tell you I never kept company with any such gentry
Come ladies and gentlemen said Mrs Mirvan as many of you as have done tea I invite to walk with me Maria and I started up instantly Lord Orville followed and I question whether we were not half round the room ere the angry disputants knew that we had left the box
As the husband of Mrs Mirvan had borne so large a share in the disagreeable altercation Lord Orville forbore to make any comments upon it so that the subject was immediately dropt and the conversation became calmly sociable and politely cheerful and to every body but me must have been highly agreeablebut as to myself I was so eagerly desirous of making some apology to Lord Orville for the impertinence of which he must have thought me guilty at the ridotto and yet so utterly unable to assume sufficient courage to speak to him concerning an affair in which I had so terribly exposed myself that I hardly ventured to say a word all the time we were walking Besides the knowledge of his contemptuous opinion haunted and dispirited me and made me fear he might possibly misconstrue whatever I should say So that far from enjoying a conversation which might at any other time have delighted me I continued silent uncomfortable and ashamed O Sir shall I ever again involve myself in so foolish an embarrassment I am sure that if I do I shall deserve greater mortification
We were not joined by the rest of the party till we had taken three or four turns around the room and then they were so quarrelsome that Mrs Mirvan complained of being fatigued and proposed going home No one dissented Lord Orville joined another party having first made an offer of his services which the gentlemen declined and we proceeded to an outward room where we waited for the carriages It was settled that we should return to town in the same manner we came to Ranelagh and accordingly Monsieur Du Bois handed Madame Duval into a hackney coach and was just preparing to follow her when she screamed and jumped hastily out declaring she was wet through all her clothes Indeed upon examination the coach was found to be in a dismal condition for the weather proved very bad and the rain had though I know not how made its way into the carriage
Mrs and Miss Mirvan and myself were already disposed of as before but no sooner did the Captain hear this account than without any ceremony he was so civil as to immediately take possession of the vacant seat in his own coach leaving Madame Duval and Monsieur Du Bois to take care of themselves As to Sir Clement Willoughby his own chariot was in waiting
I instantly begged permission to offer Madame Duval my own place and made a motion to get out but Mrs Mirvan stopped me saying that I should then be obliged to return to town with only the foreigner or Sir Clement
O never mind the old beldame cried the Captain shes weatherproof Ill answer for her and besides as we are all I hope English why shell meet with no worse than she expects from us
I do not mean to defend her said Mrs Mirvan but indeed as she belongs to our party we cannot with any decency leave the place till she is by some means accommodated
Lord my dear cried the Captain whom the distress of Madame Duval had put into very good humour why shell break her heart if she meets with any civility from a filthy Englishman
Mrs Mirvan however prevailed and we all got out of the coach to wait till Madame Duval could meet with some better carriage We found her attended by Monsieur Du Bois standing amongst the servants and very busy in wiping her negligee and endeavouring to save it from being stained by the wet as she said it was a new Lyons silk Sir Clement Willoughby offered her the use of his chariot but she had been too much piqued by his raillery to accept it We waited some time but in vain for no hackneycoach could be procured The Captain at last was persuaded to accompany Sir Clement himself and we four females were handed into Mrs Mirvans carriage though not before Madame Duval had insisted upon our making room for Monsieur Du Bois to which the Captain only consented in preference to being incommoded by him in Sir Clements chariot
Our party drove off first We were silent and unsociable for the difficulties attending this arrangement had made every one languid and fatigued Unsociable I must own we continued but very short was the duration of our silence as we had not proceeded thirty yards before every voice was heard at oncefor the coach broke down I suppose we concluded of course that we were all half killed by the violent shrieks that seemed to come from every mouth The chariot was stopped the servants came to our assistance and we were taken out of the carriage without having been at all hurt The night was dark and wet but I had scarce touched the ground when I was lifted suddenly from it by Sir Clement Willoughby who begged permission to assist me though he did not wait to have it granted but carried me in his arms back to Ranelagh
He enquired very earnestly if I was not hurt by the accident I assured him I was perfectly safe and free from injury and desired he would leave me and return to the rest of the party for I was very uneasy to know whether they had been equally fortunate He told me he was happy in being honoured with my commands and would joyfully execute them but insisted upon first conducting me to a warm room as I had not wholly escaped being wet He did not regard my objections but made me follow him to an apartment where we found an excellent fire and some company waiting for carriages I readily accepted a seat and then begged he would go
And go indeed he did but he returned in a moment telling me that the rain was more violent than ever and that he had sent his servants to offer their assistance and acquaint the Mirvans of my situation I was very mad that he would not go himself but as my acquaintance with him was so very slight I did not think proper to urge him contrary to his inclination
Well he drew a chair close to mine and after again enquiring how I did said in a low voice You will pardon me Miss Anville if the eagerness I feel to vindicate myself induces me to snatch this opportunity of making sincere acknowledgments for the impertinence with which I tormented you at the last ridotto I can assure you Madam I have been a true and sorrowful penitent ever since butshall I tell you honestly what encouraged me to
He stopt but I said nothing for I thought instantly of the conversation Miss Mirvan had overheard and supposed he was going to tell me himself what part Lord Orville had borne in it and really I did not wish to hear it repeated Indeed the rest of his speech convinces me that such was his intention with what view I know not except to make a merit of his defending me
And yet he continued my excuse may only expose my own credulity and want of judgment and penetration I will therefore merely beseech your pardon and hope that some future time
Just then the door was opened by Sir Clements servant and I had the pleasure of seeing the Captain Mrs and Miss Mirvan enter the room
O ho cried the former you have got a good warm berth here but we shall beat up your quarters Here Lucy Moll come to the fire and dry your trumpery But heydaywhy wheres old Madame French
Good God cried I is not Madame Duval then with you
With me Nothank God
I was very uneasy to know what might have become of her and if they would have suffered me I should have gone in search of her myself but all the servants were dispatched to find her and the Captain said we might be very sure her French beau would take care of her
We waited some time without any tidings and were soon the only party in the room My uneasiness increased so much that Sir Clement now made a voluntary offer of seeking her However the same moment that he opened the door with this design she presented herself at it attended by Monsieur Du Bois
I was this instant Madam said he coming to see for you
You are mighty good truly cried she to come when all the mischiefs over
She then enteredin such a conditionentirely covered with mud and in so great a rage it was with difficulty she could speak We all expressed our concern and offered our assistanceexcept the Captain who no sooner beheld her than he burst out into a loud laugh
We endeavoured by our enquiries and condolements to prevent her attending to him and she was for some time so wholly engrossed by her anger and her distress that we succeeded without much trouble We begged her to inform us how this accident happened How repeated shewhy it was all along of your all going awayand there poor Monsieur Du Boisbut it wasnt his faultfor hes as bad off as me
All eyes were then turned to Monsieur Du Bois whose clothes were in the same miserable plight with those of Madame Duval and who wet shivering and disconsolate had crept to the fire
The Captain laughed yet more heartily while Mrs Mirvan ashamed of his rudeness repeated her inquiries to Madame Duval who answered Why as we were acoming along all in the rain Monsieur Du Bois was so obliging though Im sure it was an unlucky obligingness for me as to lift me up in his arms to carry me over a place that was ankledeep in mud but instead of my being ever the better for it just as we were in the worst partIm sure I wish we had been fifty miles offfor somehow or other his foot sliptat least I suppose sothough I cant think how it happened for Im so such great weightbut however that was down we both came together all in the mud and the more we tried to get up the more deeper we got covered with the nastinessand my new Lyons negligee too quite spoilthowever its well we got up at all for we might have laid there till now for aught you all cared nobody never came near us
This recital put the Captain into an ecstasy he went from the lady to the gentleman and from the gentleman to the lady to enjoy alternately the sight of their distress He really shouted with pleasure and shaking Monsieur Du Bois strenuously by the hand wished him joy of having touched English ground and then he held a candle to Madame Duval that he might have a more complete view of her disaster declaring repeatedly that he had never been better pleased in his life
The rage of poor Madame Duval was unspeakable she dashed the candle out of his hand stamping upon the floor and at last spat in his face
This action seemed immediately to calm them both as the joy of the Captain was converted into resentment and the wrath of Madame Duval into fear for he put his hands upon her shoulders and gave her so violent a shake that she screamed out for help assuring her at the same time that if she had been one ounce less old or less ugly she should have had it all returned in her own face
Monsieur Du Bois who had seated himself very quietly at the fire approached them and expostulated very warmly with the Captain but he was neither understood nor regarded and Madame Duval was not released till she quite sobbed with passion
When they were parted I intreated her to permit the woman who has charge of the ladies cloaks to assist in drying her clothes she consented and we did what was possible to save her from catching cold We were obliged to wait in this disagreeable situation near an hour before a hackneycoach could be found and then we were disposed in the same manner as before our accident
I am going this morning to see poor Madame Duval and to inquire after her health which I think must have suffered by her last nights misfortunes though indeed she seems to be naturally strong and hearty
Adieu my dear Sir till tomorrow
LETTER XVII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Friday Morning April 15
SIR CLEMENT WILLOUGHBY called here yesterday at noon and Captain Mirvan invited him to dinner For my part I spent the day in a manner the most uncomfortable imaginable
I found Madame Duval at breakfast in bed though Monsieur Du Bois was in the chamber which so much astonished me that I was involuntarily retiring without considering how odd an appearance my retreat would have when Madame Duval called me back and laughed very heartily at my ignorance of foreign customs
The conversation however very soon took a more serious turn for she began with great bitterness to inveigh against the barbarous brutality of that fellow the Captain and the horrible illbreeding of the English in general declaring she should make her escape with all expedition from so beastly a nation But nothing can be more strangely absurd than to hear politeness recommended in language so repugnant to it as that of Madame Duval
She lamented very mournfully the fate of her Lyons silk and protested she had rather have parted with all the rest of her wardrobe because it was the first gown she had bought to wear upon leaving off her weeds She has a very bad cold and Monsieur Du Bois is so hoarse he can hardly speak
She insisted upon my staying with her all day as she intended she said to introduce me to some of my own relations I would very fain have excused myself but she did not allow me any choice
Till the arrival of these relations one continued series of questions on her side and of answers on mine filled up all the time we passed together Her curiosity was insatiable she inquired into every action of my life and every particular that had fallen under my observation in the lives of all I knew Again she was so cruel as to avow the most inveterate rancour against the sole benefactor her deserted child and grandchild have met with and such was the indignation her ingratitude raised that I would actually have quitted her presence and house had she not in a manner the most peremptory absolutely forbid me But what good Heaven can induce her to such shocking injustice O my friend and father I have no command of myself when this subject is started
She talked very much of taking me to Paris and said I greatly wanted the polish of a French education She lamented that I had been brought up in the country which she observed had given me a very bumpkinish air However she bid me not despair for she had known many girls much worse than me who had become very fine ladies after a few years residence abroad and she particularly instanced a Miss Polly Moore daughter of a chandlersshop woman who by an accident not worth relating happened to be sent to Paris where from an awkward illbred girl she so much improved that she has since been taken for a woman of quality
The relations to whom she was pleased to introduce me consisted of a Mr Branghton who is her nephew and three of his children the eldest of which is a son and the two younger are daughters
Mr Branghton appears about forty years of age He does not seem to want a common understanding though he is very contracted and prejudiced he has spent his whole time in the city and I believe feels a great contempt for all who reside elsewhere
His son seems weaker in his understanding and more gay in his temper but his gaiety is that of a foolish overgrown schoolboy whose mirth consists in noise and disturbance He disdains his father for his close attention to business and love of money though he seems himself to have no talents spirit or generosity to make him superior to either His chief delight appears to be tormenting and ridiculing his sisters who in return most heartily despise him
Miss Branghton the eldest daughter is by no means ugly but looks proud illtempered and conceited She hates the city though without knowing why for it is easy to discover she has lived no where else
Miss Polly Branghton is rather pretty very foolish very ignorant very giddy and I believe very goodnatured
The first halfhour was allotted to making themselves comfortable for they complained of having had a very dirty walk as they came on foot from Snow Hill where Mr Branghton keeps a silversmiths shop and the young ladies had not only their coats to brush and shoes to dry but to adjust their headdress which their bonnets had totally discomposed
The manner in which Madame Duval was pleased to introduce me to this family extremely shocked me Here my dears said she heres a relation you little thought of but you must know my poor daughter Caroline had this child after she run away from methough I never knew nothing of it not I for a long while after for they took care to keep it a secret from me though the poor child has never a friend in the world besides
Miss seems very tenderhearted aunt said Miss Polly and to be sure shes not to blame for her mamas undutifulness for she couldnt help it
Lord no answered she and I never took no notice of it to her for indeed as to that my own poor daughter wasnt so much to blame as you may think for shed never have gone astray if it had not been for that meddling old parson I told you of
If aunt pleases said young Mr Branghton well talk o somewhat else for Miss looks very uneasylike
The next subject that was chosen was the age of the three young Branghtons and myself The son is twenty the daughters upon hearing that I was seventeen said that was just the age of Miss Polly but their brother after a long dispute proved that she was two years older to the great anger of both sisters who agreed that he was very illnatured and spiteful
When this point was settled the question was put Which was tallestWe were desired to measure as the Branghtons were all of different opinions None of them however disputed my being the tallest in the company but in regard to one another they were extremely quarrelsome the brother insisted upon their measuring fair and not with heads and heels but they would by no means consent to lose those privileges of our sex and therefore the young man was cast as shortest though he appealed to all present upon the injustice of the decree
This ceremony over the young ladies begun very freely to examine my dress and to interrogate me concerning it This aprons your own work I suppose Miss but these sprigs ant in fashion now Pray if it is not impertinent what might you give a yard for this lutestringDo you make your own caps Miss and many other questions equally interesting and wellbred
Then they asked me how I liked London and whether I should not think the country a very dull place when I returned thither Miss must try if she cant get a good husband said Mr Branghton and then she may stay and live here
The next topic was public places or rather the theatres for they knew of no other and the merits and defects of all the actors and actresses were discussed the young man here took the lead and seemed to be very conversant on the subject But during this time what was my concern and suffer me to add my indignation when I found by some words I occasionally heard that Madame Duval was entertaining Mr Branghton with all the most secret and cruel particulars of my situation The eldest daughter was soon drawn to them by the recital the youngest and the son still kept their places intending I believe to divert me though the conversation was all their own
In a few minutes Miss Branghton coming suddenly up to her sister exclaimed Lord Polly only think Miss never saw her papa
Lord how odd cried the other why then Miss I suppose you wouldnt know him
This was quite too much for me I rose hastily and ran out of the room but I soon regretted I had so little command of myself for the two sisters both followed and insisted upon comforting me notwithstanding my earnest intreaties to be left alone
As soon as I returned to the company Madame Duval said Why my dear what was the matter with you why did you run away so
This question almost made me run again for I knew not how to answer it But is it not very extraordinary that she can put me in situations so shocking and then wonder to find me sensible of any concern
Mr Branghton junior now inquired of me whether I had seen the Tower or St Pauls church and upon my answering in the negative they proposed making a party to shew them to me Among other questions they also asked if I had ever seen such a thing as an opera I told them I had Well said Mr Branghton I never saw one in my life so long as Ive lived in London and I never desire to see one if I live here as much longer
Lord papa cried Miss Polly why not you might as well for once for the curiosity of the thing besides Miss Pomfret saw one and she says it was very pretty
Miss will think us very vulgar said Miss Branghton to live in
London and never have been to an opera but its no fault of mine
I assure you Miss only papa dont like to go
The result was that a party was proposed and agreed to for some early opportunity I did not dare contradict them but I said that my time while I remained in town was at the disposal of Mrs Mirvan However I am sure I will not attend them if I can possibly avoid doing so
When we parted Madame Duval desired to see me the next day and the Branghtons told me that the first time I went towards Snow Hill they should be very glad if I would call upon them
I wish we may not meet again till that time arrives
I am sure I shall not be very ambitious of being known to any more of my relations if they have any resemblance to those whose acquaintance I have been introduced to already
LETTER XVIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION
I HAD just finished my letter to you this morning when a violent rapping at the door made me run down stairs and who should I see in the drawing room butLord Orville
He was quite alone for the family had not assembled to breakfast He inquired first of mine then of the health of Mrs and Miss Mirvan with a degree of concern that rather surprised me till he said he had just been informed of the accident we had met with at Ranelagh He expressed his sorrow upon the occasion with utmost politeness and lamented that he had not been so fortunate as to hear of it in time to offer his services But I think he added Sir Clement Willoughby had the honour of assisting you
He was with Captain Mirvan my Lord
I had heard of his being of your party
I hope that flighty man has not been telling Lord Orville he only assisted me however he did not pursue the subject but said This accident though extremely unfortunate will not I hope be the means of frightening you from gracing Ranelagh with your presence in future
Our time my Lord for London is almost expired already
Indeed do you leave town so very soon
O yes my Lord our stay has already exceeded our intentions
Are you then so particularly partial to the country
We merely came to town my Lord to meet Captain Mirvan
And does Miss Anville feel no concern at the idea of the many mourners her absence will occasion
O my LordIm sure you dont think I stopt there for indeed I hardly knew what I was going to say My foolish embarrassment I suppose was the cause of what followed for he came to me and took my hand saying I do think that whoever has once seen Miss Anville must receive an impression never to be forgotten
This complimentfrom Lord Orvilleso surprised me that I could not speak but felt myself change colour and stood for some moments silent and looking down however the instant I recollected my situation I withdrew my hand and told him that I would see if Mrs Mirvan was not dressed He did not oppose meso away I went
I met them all on the stairs and returned with them to breakfast
I have since been extremely angry with myself for neglecting so excellent an opportunity of apologizing for my behaviour at the ridotto but to own the truth that affair never once occurred to me during the short teteetete which we had together But if ever we should happen to be so situated again I will certainly mention it for I am inexpressibly concerned at the thought of his harbouring an opinion that I am bold or impertinent and I could almost kill myself for having given him the shadow of a reason for so shocking an idea
But was not it very odd that he should make me such a compliment I expected it not from himbut gallantry I believe is common to all men whatever other qualities they may have in particular
Our breakfast was the most agreeable meal if it may be called a meal that we have had since we came to town Indeed but for Madame Duval I should like London extremely
The conversation of Lord Orville is really delightful His manners are so elegant so gentle so unassuming that they at once engage esteem and diffuse complacence Far from being indolently satisfied with his own accomplishments as I have already observed many men here are though without any pretensions to his merit he is most assiduously attentive to please and to serve all who are in his company and though his success is invariable he never manifests the smallest degree of consciousness
I could wish that you my dearest Sir knew Lord Orville because I am sure you would love him and I have felt that wish for no other person I have seen since I came to London I sometimes imagine that when his youth is flown his vivacity abated and his life is devoted to retirement he will perhaps resemble him whom I most love and honour His present sweetness politeness and diffidence seem to promise in future the same benevolence dignity and goodness But I must not expatiate upon this subject
When Lord Orville was goneand he made but a very short visitI was preparing most reluctantly to wait upon Madame Duval but Mrs Mirvan proposed to the Captain that she should be invited to dinner in Queen Ann Street and he readily consented for he said he wished to ask after her Lyons negligee
The invitation is accepted and we expect her every moment But to me it is very strange that a woman who is the uncontrolled mistress of her time fortune and actions should choose to expose herself voluntarily to the rudeness of a man who is openly determined to make her his sport But she has very few acquaintance and I fancy scarce knows how to employ herself
How great is my obligation to Mrs Mirvan for bestowing her time in a manner so disagreeable to herself merely to promote my happiness Every dispute in which her undeserving husband engages is productive of pain and uneasiness to herself of this I am so sensible that I even besought her not to send to Madame Duval but she declared she could not bear to have me pass all my time while in town with her only Indeed she could not be more kind to me were she your daughter
LETTER XIX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Saturday Morning April 16
MADAM DUVAL was accompanied by Monsieur Du Bois I am surprised that she should choose to introduce him where he is so unwelcome and indeed it is strange that they should be so constantly together though I believe I should have taken notice of it but that Captain Mirvan is perpetually rallying me upon my grandmamas beau
They were both received by Mrs Mirvan with her usual goodbreeding but the Captain most provokingly attacked her immediately saying Now Madame you that have lived abroad please to tell me this here Which did you like best the warm room at Ranelagh or the cold bath you went into afterwards though I assure you you look so well that I should advise you to take another dip
Ma foi Sir cried she nobody asked for your advice so you may as well keep it to yourself besides its no such great joke to be splashed and to catch cold and spoil all ones things whatever you may think of it
Splashed quothawhy I thought you were soused all overCome come dont mince the matter never spoil a good story you know you hadnt a dry thread about youFore George I shall never think ont without hollooing such a poor forlorn draggletailedgentlewoman and poor Monseer French here like a drowned rat by your side
Well the worse pickle we was in so much the worser in you not to help us for you knowed where we were fast enough because while I laid in the mud Im pretty sure I heard you snigger so its like enough you jostled us down yourself for Monsieur Du Bois says that he is sure he had a great jolt given him or he shouldnt have fell
The Captain laughed so immoderately that he really gave me also a suspicion that he was not entirely innocent of the charge however he disclaimed it very peremptorily
Why then continued she if you didnt do that why didnt you come to help us
Who Iwhat do you suppose I had forgot I was an Englishman a filthy beastly Englishman
Very well Sir very well but I was a fool to expect any better for its all of a piece with the rest you know you wanted to fling me out of the coachwindow the very first time ever I see you but Ill never go to Ranelagh with you no more that Im resolved for I dare say if the horses had runnd over me as I laid in that nastiness youd never have stirred a step to save me
Lord no to be sure Maam not for the world I know your opinion of our nation too well to affront you by supposing a Frenchman would want my assistance to protect you Did you think that Monseer here and I had changed characters and that he should pop you into the mud and I help you out of it Ha ha ha
O very well Sir laugh on its like your manners however if poor Monsieur Du Bois hadnt met with that unlucky accident himself I shouldnt have wanted nobodys help
O I promise you Madame youd never have had mine I knew my distance better and as to your being a little ducked or so why to be sure Monseer and you settled that between yourselves so it was no business of mine
What then I suppose you want to make me believe as Monsieur Du
Bois served me that trick opurpose
O purpose ay certainly whoever doubted that Do you think a Frenchman ever made a blunder If he had been some clumsyfooted English fellow indeed it might have been accidental but what the devil signifies all your hopping and capering with your dancingmasters if you cant balance yourselves upright
In the midst of this dialogue Sir Clement Willoughby made his appearance He affects to enter the house with the freedom of an old acquaintance and this very easiness which to me is astonishing is what most particularly recommends him to the Captain Indeed he seems very successfully to study all the humours of that gentleman
After having heartily welcomed him You are just come in time my boy said he to settle a little matter of a dispute between this here gentlewoman and I do you know she has been trying to persuade me that she did not above half like the ducking Monseer gave her tother night
I should have hoped said Sir Clement with the utmost gravity that the friendship subsisting between that lady and gentleman would have guarded them against any actions professed disagreeable to each other but probably they might not have discussed the matter previously in which case the gentleman I must own seems to have been guilty of inattention since in my humble opinion it was his business first to have inquired whether the lady preferred soft or hard ground before he dropt her
O very fine gentlemen very fine cried Madame Duval you may try to set us together by the ears as much as you will but Im not such an ignorant person as to be made a fool of so easily so you neednt talk no more about it for I sees into your designs
Monsieur Du Bois who was just able to discover the subject upon which the conversation turned made his defence in French with great solemnity he hoped he said that the company would at least acknowledge he did not come from a nation of brutes and consequently that to wilfully offend any lady was to him utterly impossible but that on the contrary in endeavouring as was his duty to save and guard her he had himself suffered in a manner which he would forbear to relate but which he greatly apprehended he should feel the ill effects of for many months and then with a countenance exceedingly lengthened he added that he hoped it would not be attributed to him as national prejudice when he owned that he must to the best of his memory aver that his unfortunate fall was owing to a sudden but violent push which he was shocked to say some malevolent person with a design to his injury must certainly have given him but whether with a view to mortify him by making him let the lady fall or whether merely to spoil his clothes he could not pretend to determine
This disputation was at last concluded by Mrs Mirvans proposing that we should all go to Coxs Museum Nobody objected and carriages were immediately ordered
In our way down stairs Madame Duval in a very passionate manner said Ma foi if I wouldnt give fifty guineas only to know who gave us that shove
This Museum is very astonishing and very superb yet if afforded me but little pleasure for it is a mere show though a wonderful one
Sir Clement Willoughby in our walk round the room asked me what my opinion was of this brilliant spectacle
It is a very fine and very ingenious answered I and yetI dont know how it isbut I seem to miss something
Excellently answered cried he you have exactly defined my own feelings though in a manner I should never have arrived at But I was certain your taste was too well formed to be pleased at the expense of your understanding
Pardi cried Madame Duval I hope you two is difficult enough Im sure if you dont like this you like nothing for its the grandest prettiest finest sight that ever I see in England
What cried the Captain with a sneer I suppose this may be in your French taste its like enough for its all kickshaw work But prythee friend turning to the person who explained the devices will you tell me the use of all this for Im not enough of a conjuror to find it out
Use indeed repeated Madame Duval disdainfully Lord if every things to be useful
Why Sir as to that Sir said our conductor the ingenuity of the mechanismthe beauty of the workmanshiptheundoubtedly Sir any person of taste may easily discern the utility of such extraordinary performances
Why then Sir answered the Captain your person of taste must be either a coxcomb or a Frenchman though for the matter of that tis the same thing
Just then our attention was attracted by a pineapple which suddenly opening discovered a nest of birds which immediately began to sing Well cried Madame Duval this is prettier than all the rest I declare in all my travels I never see nothing eleganter
Hark ye friend said the Captain hast never another pineapple
Sir
Because if thou hast prythee give it us without the birds for dye see Im no Frenchman and should relish something more substantial
This entertainment concluded with a concert of mechanical music I cannot explain how it was produced but the effect was pleasing Madame Duval was in ecstasies and the Captain flung himself into so many ridiculous distortions by way of mimicking her that he engaged the attention of all the company and in the midst of the performance of the Coronation Anthem while Madame Duval was affecting to beat time and uttering many expressions of delight he called suddenly for salts which a lady apprehending some distress politely handed to him and which instantly applying to the nostrils of poor Madame Duval she involuntarily snuffed up such a quantity that the pain and surprise made her scream aloud When she recovered she reproached him with her usual vehemence but he protested he had taken that measure out of pure friendship as he concluded from her raptures that she was going into hysterics This excuse by no means appeased her and they had a violent quarrel but the only effect her anger had on the Captain was to increase his diversion Indeed he laughs and talks so terribly loud in public that he frequently makes us ashamed of belonging to him
Madame Duval notwithstanding her wrath made no scruple of returning to dine in Queen Ann Street Mrs Mirvan had secured places for the play at DruryLane Theatre and though ever uneasy in her company she very politely invited Madame Duval to be of our party however she had a bad cold and chose to nurse it I was sorry for her indisposition but I knew not how to be sorry she did not accompany us for she isI must not say what but very unlike other people
LETTER XX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION
OUR places were in the front row of a sidebox Sir Clement Willoughby who knew our intention was at the door of the theatre and handed us from the carriage
We had not been seated five minutes before Lord Orville whom we saw in the stagebox came to us and he honoured us with his company all the evening Miss Mirvan and I both rejoiced that Madam Duval was absent as we hoped for the enjoyment of some conversation uninterrupted by her quarrels with the Captain but I soon found that her presence would have made very little alteration for as far was I from daring to speak that I knew not where even to look
The play was Love for Love and though it is fraught with wit and entertainment I hope I shall never see it represented again for it is so extremely indelicateto use the softest word I canthat Miss Mirvan and I were perpetually out of countenance and could neither make any observations ourselves nor venture to listen to those of others This was the most provoking as Lord Orville was in excellent spirits and exceedingly entertaining
When the play was over I flattered myself I should be able to look about me with less restraint as we intended to stay the farce but the curtain had hardly dropped when the boxdoor opened and in came Mr Lovel the man by whose foppery and impertinence I was so much teased at the ball where I first saw Lord Orville
I turned away my head and began talking to Miss Mirvan for I was desirous to avoid speaking to himbut in vain for as soon as he had made his compliments to Lord Orville and Sir Clement Willoughby who returned them very coldly he bent his head forward and said to me I hope Maam you have enjoyed your health since I had the honourI beg ten thousand pardons but I protest I was going to say the honour of dancing with youhowever I mean the honour of seeing you dance
He spoke with a selfcomplacency that convinced me that he had studied this address by way of making reprisals for my conduct at the ball I therefore bowed slightly but made no answer
After a short silence he again called my attention by saying in an easy negligent way I think Maam you was never in town before
No Sir
So I did presume Doubtless Maam every thing must be infinitely novel to you Our customs our manners and les etiquettes de nous autres can have little very resemblance to those you have been used to I imagine Maam your retirement is at no very small distance from the capital
I was so much disconcerted at this sneering speech that I said not a word though I have since thought my vexation both stimulated and delighted him
The air we breathe here however Maam continued he very conceitedly though foreign to that you have been accustomed to has not I hope been at variance with your health
Mr Lovel said Lord Orville could not your eye have spared that question
O my Lord answered he if health were the only cause of a ladys bloom my eye I grant had been infallible from the first glance but
Come come cried Mrs Mirvan I must beg no insinuations of that sort Miss Anvilles colour as you have successfully tried may you see be heightened but I assure you it would be past your skill to lessen it
Pon honour Madam returned he you wrong me I presumed not to infer that rouge was the only succedaneum for health but really I have known so many different causes for a ladys colour such as flushingangermauvaise honteand so forth that I never dare decide to which it may be owing
As to such causes as them there cried the Captain they must belong to those that they keep company with
Very true Captain said Sir Clement the natural complexion has nothing to do with the occasional sallies of the passions or any accidental causes
No truly returned the Captain for now heres me why I look like any other man just now and yet if you were to put me in a passion fore George youd soon see me have as fine a high colour as any painted Jezebel in all this place be she never so bedaubed
But said Lord Orville the difference of natural and of artificial colour seems to me very easily discerned that of nature is mottled and varying that of art set and too smooth it wants that animation that glow that indescribable something which even now that I see it wholly surpasses all my powers of expression
Your Lordship said Sir Clement is universally acknowledged to be a connoisseur in beauty
And you Sir Clement returned he an enthusiast
I am proud to own it cried Sir Clement in such a cause and before such objects enthusiasm is simply the consequence of not being blind
Prythee a truce with all this palavering cried the Captain the women are vain enough already no need for to puff em up more
We must all submit to the commanding officer said Sir Clement therefore let us call another subject Pray ladies how have you been entertained with the play
Want of entertainment said Mrs Mirvan is its least fault but I own there are objections to it which I should be glad to see removed
I could have ventured to answer for the ladies said Lord Orville since I am sure this is not a play that can be honoured with their approbation
What I suppose it is not sentimental enough cried the Captain or else it is too good for them for Ill maintain its one of the best comedies in our language and has more wit in one scene than there is in all the new plays put together
For my part said Mr Lovel I confess I seldom listen to the players one has so much to do in looking about and finding out ones acquaintance that really one has no time to mind the stage Pray most affectedly fixing his eyes upon a diamond ring on his little finger praywhat was the play tonight
Why what the Dl cried the Captain do you come to the play without knowing what it is
O yes Sir yes very frequently I have no time to read playbills one merely comes to meet ones friends and shew that ones alive
Ha ha haand so cried the Captain it costs you five shillings anight just to shew youre alive Well faith my friends should all think me dead and underground before Id be at that expense for em Howsomeverthis here you may take from metheyll find you out fast enough if you have anything to give emAnd so youve been here all this time and dont know what the play was
Why really Sir a play requires so much attentionit is scarce possible to keep awake if one listensfor indeed by the time it is evening one has been so fatigued with diningor wineor the houseor studyingthat it isit is perfectly an impossibility But now I think of it I believe I have a bill in my pocket O ay here it isLove for Love aytrue ha hahow could I be so stupid
O easily enough as to that I warrant you said the Captain but by my soul this is one of the best jokes I ever heardCome to a play and not know what it isWhy I suppose you wouldnt have found it out if they had fobd you off with a scraping of fiddlers or an operaHa ha haWhy now I should have thought you might have taken some notice of one Mr Tattle that is in this play
This sarcasm which caused a general smile made him colour but turning to the Captain with a look of conceit which implied that he had a retort ready he said Pray Sir give me leave to askWhat do you think of one Mr Ben who is also in this play
The Captain regarding him with the utmost contempt answered in a loud voice Think of himwhy I think he is a man And then staring full in his face he struck his cane on the ground with a violence that made him start He did not however choose to take any notice of this but having bit his nails some time in manifest confusion he turned very quick to me and in a sneering tone of voice said For my part I was most struck with the country young lady Miss Prue pray what do you think of her Maam
Indeed Sir cried I very much provoked I thinkthat is I do not think any thing about her
Well really Maam you prodigiously surprise memais apparemment ce nest quune facon de parler though I should beg your pardon for probably you do not understand French
I made no answer for I thought his rudeness intolerable but Sir Clement with great warmth said I am surprised that you can suppose such an object as Miss Prue would engage the attention of Miss Anville even for a moment
O Sir returned this fop tis the first character in the pieceso well drawnso much the thingsuch true country breedingsuch rural ignorance ha ha hatis most admirably hit off pon honour
I could almost have cried that such impertinence should be leveled at me and yet chagrined as I was I could never behold Lord Orville and this man at the same time and feel any regret for the cause I had given of displeasure
The only female in the play said Lord Orville worthy of being mentioned to these ladies is Angelica
Angelica cried Sir Clement is a noble girl she tries her lover severely but she rewards him generously
Yet in a trial so long said Mrs Mirvan there seems rather too much consciousness of her power
Since my opinion has the sanction of Mrs Mirvan added Lord Orville I will venture to say that Angelica bestows her hand rather with the air of a benefactress than with the tenderness of a mistress Generosity without delicacy like wit without judgment generally gives as much pain as pleasure The uncertainty in which she keeps Valentine and her manner of trifling with his temper give no very favourable idea of her own
Well my Lord said Mr Lovel it must however be owned that uncertainty is not the ton among our ladies at present nay indeed I think they saythough faith taking a pinch of snuff I hope it is not truebut they say that we now are most shy and backward
The curtain then drew up and our conversation ceased Mr Lovel finding we chose to attend to the players left the box How strange it is Sir that this man not contented with the large share of foppery and nonsense which he has from nature should think proper to affect yet more for what he said of Tattle and of Miss Prue convinced me that he really had listened to the play though he was so ridiculous and foolish as to pretend ignorance
But how malicious and impertinent is this creature to talk to me in such a manner I am sure I hope I shall never see him again I should have despised him heartily as a fop had he never spoken to me at all but now that he thinks proper to resent his supposed illusage I am really quite afraid of him
The entertainment was The Duece is in Him which Lord Orville observed to be the most finished and elegant petit piece that was ever written in English
In our way home Mrs Mirvan put me into some consternation by saying it was evident from the resentment which this Mr Lovel harbours of my conduct that he would think it a provocation sufficiently important for a duel if his courage equaled his wrath
I am terrified at the very idea Good Heaven that a man so weak and frivolous should be so revengeful However if bravery would have excited him to affront Lord Orville how much reason have I to rejoice that cowardice makes him contended with venting his spleen upon me But we shall leave town soon and I hope see him no more
It was some consolation to me to hear from Miss Mirvan that while he was speaking to me so cavalierly Lord Orville regarded him with great indignation
But really I think there ought to be a book of the laws and customs elamode presented to all young people upon their first introduction into public company
Tonight we go to the opera where I expect very great pleasure We shall have the same party as at the play for Lord Orville said he should be there and would look for us
LETTER XXI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION I HAVE a volume to write of the adventures of yesterday In the afternoonat Berry Hill I should have said the evening for it was almost six oclockwhile Miss Mirvan and I were dressing for the opera and in high spirits from the expectation of great entertainment and pleasure we heard a carriage stop at the door and concluded that Sir Clement Willoughby with his usual assiduity was come to attend us to the Haymarket but in a few moments what was our surprise to see our chamber door flung open and the two Miss Branghtons enter the room They advanced to me with great familiarity saying How do you do Cousinso weve caught you at the glasswell Im determined Ill tell my brother of that
Miss Mirvan who had never before seen them and could not at first imagine who they were looked so much astonished that I was ready to laugh myself till the eldest said Were come to take you to the opera Miss papa and my brother are below and we are to call for your grandmama as we go along
I am very sorry answered I that you should have taken so much trouble as I am engaged already
Engaged Lord Miss never mind that cried the youngest this young lady will make your excuses I dare say its only doing as one would be done by you know
Indeed Maam said Miss Mirvan I shall myself be very sorry to be deprived of Miss Anvilles company this evening
Well Miss that is not so very goodnatured in you said Miss Branghton considering we only come to give our cousin pleasure its no good to us its all upon her account for we came I dont know how much round about to take her up
I am extremely obliged to you said I and very sorry you have lost so much time but I cannot possibly help it for I engaged myself without knowing you would call
Lord what signifies that said Miss Polly youre no old maid and so you neednt be so very formal besides I dare say those you are engaged to ant half so near related to you as we are
I must beg you not to press me any further for I assure you it is not in my power to attend you
Why we came all out of the city on purpose besides your grandmama expects youand pray what are we to say to her
Tell her if you please that I am much concernedbut that I am preengaged
And who to demanded the abrupt Miss Branghton
To Mrs Mirvanand a large party
And pray what are you all going to do that it would be such a mighty matter for you to come along with us
We are all going toto the opera
O dear if that be all why cant we go altogether
I was extremely disconcerted at this forward and ignorant behaviour and yet their rudeness very much lessened my concern at refusing them Indeed their dress was such as would have rendered their scheme of accompanying our party impracticable even if I had desired it and this as they did not themselves find it out I was obliged in terms the least mortifying I could think of to tell them
They were very much chagrined and asked where I should sit
In the pit answered I
In the pit repeated Miss Branghton well really I must own I should never have supposed that my gown was not good enough for the pit but come Polly lets go if Miss does not think us fine enough for her why to be sure she may choose
Surprised at this ignorance I would have explained to them that the pit at the opera required the same dress as the boxes but they were so much affronted they would not hear me and in great displeasure left the room saying they would not have troubled me only they thought I should not be proud with my own relations and that they had at least as good a right to my company as strangers
I endeavoured to apologize and would have sent a long message to Madame Duval but they hastened away without listening to me and I could not follow them down stairs because I was not dressed The last words I heard them say were Well her grandmama will be in a fine passion thats one good thing
Though I was extremely mad at this visit yet I so heartily rejoiced at their going that I would not suffer myself to think gravely about it
Soon after Sir Clement actually came and we all went down stairs Mrs Mirvan ordered tea and we were engaged in a very lively conversation when the servant announced Madame Duval who instantly followed him into the room
Her face was the colour of scarlet and her eyes sparkled with fury She came up to me with a hasty step saying So Miss you refuses to come to me do you And pray who are you to dare to disobey me
I was quite frightenedI made no answerI even attempted to rise and could not but sat still mute and motionless
Everybody but Miss Mirvan seemed in the utmost astonishment and the Captain rising and approaching Madame Duval with a voice of authority said Why how now Mrs Turkeycock whats put you into this here fluster
Its nothing to you answered she so you may as well hold your tongue for I shant be called to no account by you I assure you
There youre out Madame Fury returned he for you must know
I never suffer anybody to be in a passion in my house but myself
But you shall cried she in a great rage for Ill be in as great a passion as ever I please without asking your leave so dont give yourself no more airs about it And as for you Miss again advancing to me I order you to follow me this moment or else Ill make you repent it all your life And with these words she flung out of the room
I was in such extreme terror at being addressed and threatened in a manner to which I am so wholly unused that I almost thought I should have fainted
Dont be alarmed my love cried Mrs Mirvan but stay where you are and I will follow Madame Duval and try to bring her to reason
Miss Mirvan took my hand and most kindly endeavoured to raise my spirits Sir Clement too approached me with an air so interested in my distress that I could not but feel myself obliged to him and taking my other hand said For Heavens sake my dear Madam compose yourself surely the violence of such a wretch ought merely to move your contempt she can have no right I imagine to lay her commands upon you and I only wish that you would allow me to speak to her
O no not for the worldindeed I believeI am afraidI had better follow her
Follow her Good God my dear Miss Anville would you trust yourself with a mad woman for what else can you call a creature whose passions are so insolent No no send her word at once to leave the house and tell her you desire that she will never see you again
O Sir you dont know who you talk ofit would ill become me to send Madame Duval such a message
But why cried he looking very inquisitive why should you scruple to treat her as she deserves
I then found that his aim was to discover the nature of her connection with me but I felt so much ashamed of my near relationship to her that I could not persuade myself to answer him and only intreated that he would leave her to Mrs Mirvan who just then entered the room
Before she could speak to me the Captain called out Well Goody what have you done with Madame French is she cooled a little cause if she bent Ive just thought of a most excellent device to bring her to
My dear Evelina said Mrs Mirvan I have been vainly endeavouring to appease her I pleaded your engagement and promised your future attendance but I am sorry to say my love that I fear her rage will end in a total breach which I think you had better avoid if she is any further opposed
Then I will go to her Madam cried I and indeed it is now no matter for I should not be able to recover my spirits sufficiently to enjoy much pleasure any where this evening
Sir Clement began a very warm expostulation and intreaty that I would not go but I begged him to desist and told him very honestly that if my compliance were not indispensably necessary I should require no persuasion to stay He then took my hand to lead me down stairs but the Captain desired him to be quiet saying he would squire me himself because he added exultingly rubbing his hands I have a wipe ready for the old lady which may serve her to chew as she goes along
We found her in the parlour O youre come at last Miss are youfine airs you give yourself indeedma foi if you hadnt come you might have staid I assure you and have been a beggar for your pains
Heyday Madam cried the Captain prancing forward with a look of great glee what ant you got out of that there passion yet why then Ill tell you what to do to cool yourself call upon your old friend Monseer Slippery who was with you at Ranelagh and give my service to him and tell him if he sets any store by your health that I desire hell give you such another souse as he did before hell know what I mean and Ill warrant you hell dot for my sake
Let him if he dares cried Madame Duval but I shant stay to answer you no more you are a vulgar fellowand so child let us leave him to himself
Hark ye Madam cried the Captain youd best not call names because dye see if you do I shall make bold to shew you the door
She changed colour and saying Pardi I can shew it myself hurried out of the room and I followed her into a hackneycoach But before we drove off the Captain looking out of the parlour window called out Dye hear Madam dont forget my message to Monseer
You will believe our ride was not the most agreeable in the world indeed it would be difficult to say which was least pleased Madame Duval or me though the reasons of our discontent were so different however Madame Duval soon got the start of me for we had hardly turned out of Queen Ann Street when a man running full speed stopt the coach He came up to the window and I saw he was the Captains servant He had a broad grin on his face and panted for breath Madame Duval demanded his business Madam answered he my master desires his compliments to you andandand he says he wishes it well over with you He he he
Madame Duval instantly darted forward and gave him a violent blow on the face Take that back for your answer sirrah cried she and learn not to grin at your betters another time Coachman drive on
The servant was in a violent passion and swore terribly but we were soon out of hearing
The rage of Madame Duval was greater than ever and she inveighed against the Captain with such fury that I was even apprehensive she would have returned to his house purposely to reproach him which she repeatedly threatened to do nor would she I believe have hesitated a moment but that notwithstanding her violence he has really made her afraid of him
When we came to her lodgings we found all the Branghtons in the passage impatiently waiting for us with the door open
Only see heres Miss cried the brother
Well I declare I thought as much said the younger sister
Why Miss said Mr Branghton I think you might as well have come with your cousins at once its throwing money in the dirt to pay two coaches for one fare
Lord father cried the son make no words about that for Ill pay for the coach that Miss had
O I know very well answered Mr Branghton that youre always more ready to spend than to earn
I then interfered and begged that I might myself be allowed to pay the fare as the expense was incurred upon my account they all said no and proposed that the same coach should carry us to the opera
While this passed the Miss Branghtons were examining my dress which indeed was very improper for my company and as I was extremely unwilling to be so conspicuous amongst them I requested Madame Duval to borrow a hat or bonnet for me of the people of the house But she never wears either herself and thinks them very English and barbarous therefore she insisted that I should go full dressed as I had prepared myself for the pit though I made many objections
We were then all crowded into the same carriage but when we arrived at the operahouse I contrived to pay the coachman They made a great many speeches but Mr Branghtons reflection had determined me not to be indebted to him
If I had not been too much chagrined to laugh I should have been extremely diverted at their ignorance of whatever belongs to an opera In the first place they could not tell at what door we ought to enter and we wandered about for some time without knowing which way to turn they did not choose to apply to me though I was the only person of the party who had ever before been at an opera because they were unwilling to suppose that their country counsin as they were pleased to call me should be better acquainted with any London public place than themselves I was very indifferent and careless upon this subject but not a little uneasy at finding that my dress so different from that of the company to which I belonged attracted general notice and observation
In a short time however we arrived at one of the doorkeepers bars Mr Branghton demanded for what part of the house they took money They answered the pit and regarded us all with great earnestness The son then advancing said Sir if you please I beg that I may treat Miss
Well settle that another time answered Mr Branghton and put down a guinea
Two tickets of admission were given to him
Mr Branghton in his turn now stared at the doorkeeper and demanded what he meant by giving him only two tickets for a guinea
Only two Sir said the man why dont you know that the tickets are halfa guinea each
Halfaguinea each repeated Mr Branghton why I never heard of such a thing in my life And pray Sir how many will they admit
Just as usual Sir one person each
But one person for halfaguineawhy I only want to sit in the pit friend
Had not the ladies better sit in the gallery Sir for theyll hardly choose to go into the pit with their hats on
O as to that cried Miss Branghton if our hats are too high well take them off when we get in I shant mind it for I did my hair on purpose
Another party then approaching the doorkeeper could no longer attend to Mr Branghton who taking up the guinea told him it should be long enough before hed see it again and walked away
The young ladies in some confusion expressed their surprise that their papa should not know the opera prices which for their parts they had read in the papers a thousand times
The price of stocks said he is enough for me to see after and
I took it for granted it was the same thing here as at the playhouse
I knew well enough what the price was said the son but I would not speak because I thought perhaps theyd take less as were such a large party
The sisters both laughed very contemptuously at this idea and asked him if he ever heard of peoples abating any thing at a public place I dont know whether I have or not answered he but I am sure if they would youd like it so much the worse
Very true Tom cried Mr Branghton tell a woman that any thing is reasonable and shell be sure to hate it
Well said Miss Polly I hope that aunt and Miss will be of our side for papa always takes part with Tom
Come come cried Madame Duval if you stand talking here we shant get no place at all
Mr Branghton then enquired the way to the gallery and when we came to the doorkeeper demanded what was to pay
The usual price Sir said the man
Then give me change cried Mr Branghton again putting down his guinea
For how many Sir
Whylets seefor six
For six Sir why youre given me but a guinea
But a guinea why how much would you have I suppose it isnt halfaguinea a piece here too
No Sir only five shillings
Mr Branghton again took up his unfortunate guinea and protested he would not submit to no such imposition I then proposed that we should return home but Madame Duval would not consent and we were conducted by a woman who sells books of the opera to another gallerydoor where after some disputing Mr Branghton at last paid and we all went up stairs
Madame Duval complained very much of the trouble of going so high but Mr Branghton desired her not to hold the place too cheap for whatever you think cried he I assure you I paid pit price so dont suppose I come here to save my money
Well to be sure said Miss Branghton theres no judging of a place by the outside else I must needs say theres nothing very extraordinary in the staircase
But when we entered the gallery their amazement and disappointment became general For a few instants they looked at one another without speaking and then they all broke silence at once
Lord papa exclaimed Miss Polly why you have brought us to the oneshilling gallery
Ill be glad to give you two shillings though answered he to pay I was never so fooled out of my money before since the house of my birth Either the doorkeepers a knave or this is the greatest imposition that ever was put upon the public
Ma foi cried Madame Duval I never sat in such a mean place in all my lifewhy its as highwe shant see nothing
I thought at the time said Mr Branghton that three shillings was an exorbitant price for a place in the gallery but as wed been asked so much at the other doors why I paid it without many words but then to be sure thinks I it can never be like any other gallery we shall see some crinkumcrankum or other for our money but I find its as arrant a takein as ever I met with
Why its as like the twelvepenny gallery at Drury Lane cried the son as two peas are to one another I never knew father so bit before
Lord said Miss Branghton I thought it would have been quite a fine placeall over I dont know whatand done quite in taste
In this manner they continued to express their dissatisfaction till the curtain drew up after which their observations were very curious
They made no allowance for the customs or even for the language of another country but formed all their remarks upon comparisons with the English theatre
Notwithstanding my vexation at having been forced into a party so very disagreeable and that too from one so muchso very much the contraryyet would they have suffered me to listen I should have forgotten every thing unpleasant and felt nothing but delight in hearing the sweet voice of Signor Millico the first singer but they tormented me with continual talking
What a jabbering they make cried Mr Branghton theres no knowing a word they say Pray whats the reason they cant as well sing in Englishbut I suppose the fine folks would not like it if they could understand it
How unnatural their action is said the son why now who ever saw an Englishman put himself in such outoftheway postures
For my part said Miss Polly I think its very pretty only I dont know what it means
Lord what does that signify cried her sister maynt one like a thing without being so very particularYou may see that Miss likes it and I dont suppose she knows more of the matter than we do
A gentleman soon after was so obliging as to make room in the front row for Miss Branghton and me We had no sooner seated ourselves than Miss Branghton exclaimed Good gracious only seewhy Polly all the people in the pit are without hats dressed like anything
Lord so they are cried Miss Polly well I never saw the likeits worth coming to the opera if one saw nothing else
I was then able to distinguish the happy party I had left and I saw that Lord Orville had seated himself next to Mrs Mirvan Sir Clement had his eyes perpetually cast towards the fiveshilling gallery where I suppose he concluded that we were seated however before the opera was over I have reason to believe that he had discovered me high and distant as I was from him Probably he distinguished me by my headdress
At the end of the first act as the green curtain dropped to prepare for the dance they imagined that the opera was done and Mr Branghton expressed great indignation that he had been tricked out of his money with so little trouble Now if any Englishman was to do such an impudent thing as this said he why hed be peltedbut here one of these outlandish gentry may do just what he pleases and come on and squeak out a song or two and then pocket your money without further ceremony
However so determined he was to be dissatisfied that before the conclusion of the third act he found still more fault with the opera for being too long and wondered whether they thought their singing good enough to serve us for supper
During the symphony of a song of Signor Millicos in the second act young Mr Branghton said Its my belief that that fellows going to sing another songwhy theres nothing but singingI wonder when theyll speak
This song which was slow and pathetic caught all my attention and I leaned my head forward to avoid hearing their observations that I might listen without interruption but upon turning round when the song was over I found that I was the object of general diversion to the whole party for the Miss Branghtons were tittering and the two gentlemen making signs and faces at me implying their contempt of my affectation
This discovery determined me to appear as inattentive as themselves but I was very much provoked at being thus prevented enjoying the only pleasure which in such a party was within my power
So Miss said Mr Branghton youre quite in the fashion I seeso you like operas Well Im not so polite I cant like nonsense let it be never so much the taste
But pray Miss said the son what makes that fellow look so doleful while he is singing
Probably because the character he performs is in distress
Why then I think he might as well let alone singing till hes in better cue its out of all nature for a man to be piping when hes in distress For my part I never sing but when Im merry yet I love a song as well as most people
When the curtain dropt they all rejoiced
How do you like itand How do you like it passed from one to another with looks of the utmost contempt As for me said Mr Branghton theyve caught me once but if ever they do again Ill give em leave to sing me to Bedlam for my pains for such a heap of stuff never did I hear there isnt one ounce of sense in the whole opera nothing but one continued squeaking and squalling from beginning to end
If I had been in the pit said Madame Duval I should have liked it vastly for music is my passion but sitting in such a place as this is quite unbearable
Miss Branghton looking at me declared that she was not genteel enough to admire it
Miss Polly confessed that if they would but sing English she would like it very well
The brother wished he could raise a riot in the house because then he might get his money again
And finally they all agreed that it was monstrous dear
During the last dance I perceived standing near the gallerydoor Sir Clement Willoughby I was extremely vexed and would have given the world to have avoided being seen by him my chief objection was from the apprehension that he would hear Miss Branghton call me cousinI fear you will think this London journey has made me grow very proud but indeed this family is so lowbred and vulgar that I should be equally ashamed of such a connection in the country or anywhere And really I had already been so much chagrined that Sir Clement had been a witness of Madame Duvals power over me that I could not bear to be exposed to any further mortification
As the seats cleared by parties going away Sir Clement approached nearer to us The Miss Branghtons observed with surprise what a fine gentleman was come into the gallery and they gave me great reason to expect that they would endeavour to attract his notice by familiarity with me whenever he should join us and so I formed a sort of plan to prevent any conversation Im afraid you will think it wrong and so I do myself nowbut at the time I only considered how I might avoid immediate humiliation
As soon as he was within two seats of us he spoke to me I am very happy Miss Anville to have found you for the ladies below have each an humble attendant and therefore I am come to offer my services here
Why then cried I not without hesitating if you pleaseI will join them
Will you allow me the honour of conducting you cried he eagerly and instantly taking my hand he would have marched away with me but I turned to Madame Duval and said As our party is so large Madame if you will give me leave I will go down to Mrs Mirvan that I may not crowd you in the coach
And then without waiting for an answer I suffered Sir Clement to hand me out of the gallery
Madame Duval I doubt not will be very angry and so I am with myself now and therefore I cannot be surprised but Mr Branghton I am sure will easily comfort himself in having escaped the additional coachexpense of carrying me to Queen Ann Street as to his daughters they had no time to speak but I saw they were in utter amazement
My intention was to join Mrs Mirvan and accompany her home Sir Clement was in high spirits and good humour and all the way he went I was fool enough to rejoice in secret at the success of my plan nor was it till I got down stairs and amidst the servants that any difficulty occurred to me of meeting with my friends
I then asked Sir Clement how I should contrive to acquaint Mrs Mirvan that I had left Madame Duval
I fear it will be almost impossible to find her answered he but you can have no objection to permitting me to see you safe home
He then desired his servant who was waiting to order his chariot to draw up
This quite startled me I turned to him hastily and said that I could not think of going away without Mrs Mirvan
But how can we meet with her cried he you will not choose to go into the pit yourself I cannot send a servant there and it is impossible for me to go and leave you alone
The truth of this was indisputable and totally silenced me Yet as soon as I could recollect myself I determined not to go into his chariot and told him I believed I had best return to my party up stairs
He would not hear of this and earnestly intreated me not to withdraw the trust I had reposed in him
While he was speaking I saw Lord Orville with several ladies and gentlemen coming from the pit passage unfortunately he saw me too and leaving his company advanced instantly towards me and with an air and voice of surprise said Good God do I see Miss Anville
I now most severely felt the folly of my plan and the awkwardness of my situation however I hastened to tell him though in a hesitating manner that I was waiting for Mrs Mirvan but what was my disappointment when he acquainted me that she was already gone home
I was inexpressibly distressed to suffer Lord Orville to think me satisfied with the single protection of Sir Clement Willoughby I could not bear yet I was more than ever averse to returning to a party which I dreaded his seeing I stood some moments in suspense and could not help exclaiming Good Heaven what can I do
Why my dear madam cried Sir Clement should you be thus uneasyyou will reach Queen Ann Street almost as soon as Mrs Mirvan and I am sure you cannot doubt being as safe
I made no answer and Lord Orville then said My coach is here and my servants are ready to take any commands Miss Anville will honour me with for them I shall myself go home in a chair and therefore
How grateful did I feel for a proposal so considerate and made with so much delicacy I should gladly have accepted it had I been permitted but Sir Clement would not let him even finish his speech he interrupted him with evident displeasure and said My Lord my own chariot is now at the door
And just then the servant came and told him the carriage was ready He begged to have the honour of conducting me to it and would have taken my hand but I drew it back saying I cantI cant indeed pray go by yourselfand as to me let me have a chair
Impossible cried he with vehemence I cannot think of trusting you with strange chairmenI cannot answer it to Mrs Mirvancome dear Madam we shall be home in five minutes
Again I stood suspended With what joy would I then have compromised with my pride to have been once more with Madame Duval and the Branghtons provided I had not met with Lord Orville However I flatter myself that he not only saw but pitied my embarrassment for he said in a tone of voice unusually softened To offer my services in the presence of Sir Clement Willoughby would be superfluous but I hope I need not assure Miss Anville how happy it would make me to be of the least use to her
I courtsied my thanks Sir Clement with great earnestness pressed me to go and while I was thus uneasily deliberating what to do the dance I suppose finished for the people crowded down stairs Had Lord Orville then repeated his offer I would have accepted it notwithstanding Sir Clements repugnance but I fancy he thought it would be impertinent In a very few minutes I heard Madame Duvals voice as she descended from the gallery Well cried I hastily if I must go I stopt but Sir Clement immediately handed me into his chariot called out Queen Ann Street and then jumped in himself Lord Orville with a bow and a half smile wished me good night
My concern was so great at being seen and left by Lord Orville in so strange a situation that I should have been best pleased to have remained wholly silent during our ride home but Sir Clement took care to prevent that
He began by making many complaints of my unwillingness to trust myself with him and begged to know what could be the reason This question so much embarrassed me that I could not tell what to answer but only said that I was sorry to have taken up so much of his time
O Miss Anville cried he taking my hand if you knew with what transport I would dedicate to you not only the present but all the future time allotted to me you would not injure me by making such an apology
I could not think of a word to say to this nor to a great many other equally fine speeches with which he ran on though I would fain have withdrawn my hand and made almost continual attempts but in vain for he actually grasped it between both his without any regard to my resistance
Soon after he said that he believed the coachman was going the wrong way and he called to his servant and gave him directions Then again addressing himself to me How often how assiduously have I sought an opportunity of speaking to you without the presence of that brute Captain Mirvan Fortune has now kindly favoured me with one and permit me again seizing my hand permit me to use it in telling you that I adore you
I was quite thunderstruck at this abrupt and unexpected declaration For some moments I was silent but when I recovered from my surprise I said Indeed Sir if you were determined to make me repent leaving my own party so foolishly you have very well succeeded
My dearest life cried he is it possible you can be so cruel Can your nature and your countenance be so totally opposite Can the sweet bloom upon those charming cheeks which appears as much the result of goodhumour as of beauty
O Sir cried I interrupting him this is very fine but I had hoped we had had enough of this sort of conversation at the ridotto and I did not expect you would so soon resume it
What I then said my sweet reproacher was the effect of a mistaken a profane idea that your understanding held no competition with your beauty but now now that I find you equally incomparable in both all words all powers of speech are too feeble to express the admiration I feel of your excellencies
Indeed cried I if your thoughts had any connection with your language you would never suppose that I could give credit to praise so very much above my desert
This speech which I made very gravely occasioned still stronger protestations which he continued to pour forth and I continued to disclaim till I began to wonder that we were not in Queen Ann Street and begged he would desire the coachman to drive faster
And does this little moment cried he which is the first of happiness I have ever known does it already appear so very long to you
I am afraid the man has mistaken the way answered I or else we should ere now have been at our journeys end I must beg you will speak to him
And can you think me so much my own enemyif my good genius has inspired the man with a desire of prolonging my happiness can you expect that I should counteract its indulgence
I now began to apprehend that he had himself ordered the man to go a wrong way and I was so much alarmed at the idea that the very instant it occurred to me I let down the glass and made a sudden effort to open the chariotdoor myself with a view of jumping into the street but he caught hold of me exclaiming For Heavens sake what is the matter
II dont know cried I quite out of breath but I am sure the man goes wrong and if you will not speak to him I am determined I will get out myself
You amaze me answered he still holding me I cannot imagine what you apprehend Surely you can have no doubts of my honour
He drew me towards him as he spoke I was frightened dreadfully and could hardly say No Sir nonone at all only Mrs MirvanI think she will be uneasy
Whence this alarm my dearest angelWhat can you fearmy life is at your devotion and can you then doubt my protection
And so saying he passionately kissed my hand
Never in my whole life have I been so terrified I broke forcibly from him and putting my head out of the window called aloud to the man to stop Where we then were I know not but I saw not a human being or I should have called for help
Sir Clement with great earnestness endeavoured to appease and compose me If you do not intend to murder me cried I for mercys for pitys sake let me get out
Compose your spirits my dearest life cried he and I will do everything you would have me And then he called to the man himself and bid him make haste to Queen Ann Street This stupid fellow continued he has certainly mistaken my orders but I hope you are now fully satisfied
I made no answer but kept my head at the window watching which way he drove but without any comfort to myself as I was quite unacquainted with either the right or the wrong
Sir Clement now poured forth abundant protestations of honour and assurances of respect intreating my pardon for having offended me and beseeching my good opinion but I was quite silent having too much apprehension to make reproaches and too much anger to speak without
In this manner we went through several streets till at last to my great terror he suddenly ordered the man to stop and said Miss Anville we are now within twenty yards of your house but I cannot bear to part with you till you generously forgive me for the offence you have taken and promise not to make it known to the Mirvans
I hesitated between fear and indignation
Your reluctance to speak redoubles my contrition for having displeased you since it shews the reliance I might have on a promise which you will not give without consideration
I am very very much distressed cried I you ask a promise which you must be sensible I ought not to grant and yet dare not refuse
Drive on cried he to the coachmanMiss Anville I will not compel you I will exact no promise but trust wholly to your generosity
This rather softened me which advantage he no sooner received than he determined to avail himself of for he flung himself on his knees and pleaded with so much submission that I was really obliged to forgive him because his humiliation made me quite ashamed and after that he would not let me rest till I gave him my word that I would not complain of him to Mrs Mirvan
My own folly and pride which had put me in his power were pleas which I could not but attend to in his favour However I shall take very particular care never to be again alone with him
When at last we arrived at our house I was so overjoyed that I should certainly have pardoned him then if I had not before As he handed me up stairs he scolded his servant aloud and very angrily for having gone so much out of the way Miss Mirvan ran out to meet me and who should I see behind her but Lord Orville
All my joy now vanished and gave place to shame and confusion for I could not endure that he should know how long a time Sir Clement and I had been together since I was not at liberty to assign any reason for it
They all expressed great satisfaction at seeing me and said they had been extremely uneasy and surprised that I was so long coming home as they had heard from Lord Orville that I was not with Madame Duval Sir Clement in an affected passion said that his booby of a servant had misunderstood his orders and was driving us to the upper end of Piccadilly For my part I only coloured for though I would not forfeit my word I yet disdained to confirm a tale in which I had myself no belief
Lord Orville with great politeness congratulated me that the troubles of the evening had so happily ended and said that he had found it impossible to return home before he enquired after my safety
In a very short time he took his leave and Sir Clement followed him As soon as they were gone Mrs Mirvan though with great softness blamed me for having quitted Madame Duval I assured her and with truth that for the future I would be more prudent
The adventures of the evening so much disconcerted me that I could not sleep all night I am under the most cruel apprehensions lest Lord Orville should suppose my being on the gallerystairs with Sir Clement was a concerted scheme and even that our continuing so long together in his chariot was with my approbation since I did not say a word on the subject nor express my dissatisfaction at the coachmans pretended blunder
Yet his coming hither to wait our arrival though it seems to imply some doubt shews also some anxiety Indeed Miss Mirvan says that he appeared extremely anxious nay uneasy and impatient for my return If I did not fear to flatter myself I should think it not impossible but that he had a suspicion of Sir Clements design and was therefore concerned for my safety
What a long letter is this however I shall not write many more from London for the Captain said this morning that he would leave town on Tuesday next Madame Duval will dine here today and then she is to be told his intention
I am very much amazed that she accepted Mrs Mirvans invitation as she was in such wrath yesterday I fear that today I shall myself be the principal object of her displeasure but I must submit patiently for I cannot defend myself
Adieu my dearest Sir Should this letter be productive of any uneasiness to you more than ever shall I repent the heedless imprudence which it recites
LETTER XXII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Monday Morning April 18
MRS MIRVAN has just communicated to me an anecdote concerning Lord
Orville which has much surprised half pleased and half pained me
While they were sitting together during the opera he told her that he had been greatly concerned at the impertinence which the young lady under her protection had suffered from Mr Lovel but that he had the pleasure of assuring her she had no future disturbance to apprehend from him
Mrs Mirvan with great eagerness begged he would explain himself and said she hoped he had not thought so insignificant an affair worthy his serious attention
There is nothing answered he which requires more immediate notice than impertinence for it ever encroaches when it is tolerated He then added that he believed he ought to apologize for the liberty he had taken in interfering but that as he regarded himself in the light of a party concerned from having had the honour of dancing with Miss Anville he could not possibly reconcile to himself a patient neutrality
He then proceeded to tell her that he had waited upon Mr Lovel the morning after the play that the visit had proved an amicable one but the particulars were neither entertaining nor necessary he only assured her Miss Anville might be perfectly easy since Mr Lovel had engaged his honour never more to mention or even to hint at what had passed at Mrs Stanleys assembly
Mrs Mirvan expressed her satisfaction at this conclusion and thanked him for his polite attention to her young friend
It would be needless said he to request that this affair may never transpire since Mrs Mirvan cannot but see the necessity of keeping it inviolably secret but I thought it incumbent upon me as the young lady is under your protection to assure both you and her of Mr Lovels future respect
Had I known of this visit previous to Lord Orvilles making it what dreadful uneasiness would it have cost me Yet that he should so much interest himself in securing me from offence gives me I must own an internal pleasure greater than I can express for I feared he had too contemptuous an opinion of me to take any trouble upon my account Though after all this interference might rather be to satisfy his own delicacy than from thinking well of me
But how cool how quiet is true courage Who from seeing Lord Orville at the play would have imagined his resentment would have hazarded his life yet his displeasure was evident though his real bravery and his politeness equally guarded him from entering into any discussion in our presence
Madame Duval as I expected was most terribly angry yesterday she scolded me for I believe two hours on account of having left her and protested she had been so much surprised at my going without giving her time to answer that she hardly knew whether she was awake or asleep But she assured me that if ever I did so again she would never more take me into public And she expressed an equal degree of displeasure against Sir Clement because he had not even spoken to her and because he was always of the Captains side in an argument The Captain as bound in honour warmly defended him and then followed a dispute in the usual style
After dinner Mrs Mirvan introduced the subject of our leaving
London Madame Duval said she would stay a month or two longer The
Captain told her she was welcome but that he and his family should
go into the country on Tuesday morning
A most disagreeable scene followed Madame Duval insisted upon keeping me with her but Mrs Mirvan said that as I was actually engaged on a visit to Lady Howard who had only consented to my leaving her for a few days she could not think of returning without me
Perhaps if the Captain had not interfered the goodbreeding and mildness of Mrs Mirvan might have had some effect upon Madame Duval but he passes no opportunity of provoking her and therefore made so many gross and rude speeches all of which she retorted that in conclusion she vowed she would sooner go to law in right of her relationship than that I should be taken away from her
I heard this account from Mrs Mirvan who was so kindly considerate as to give me a pretence for quitting the room as soon as this dispute began lest Madame Duval should refer to me and insist on my obedience
The final result of the conversation was that to soften matters for the present Madame Duval should make one in the party to Howard Grove whither we are positively to go next Wednesday And though we are none of us satisfied with this plan we know not how to form a better
Mrs Mirvan is now writing to Lady Howard to excuse bringing this unexpected guest and prevent the disagreeable surprise which must otherwise attend her reception This dear lady seems eternally studying my happiness and advantage
Tonight we go to the Pantheon which is the last diversion we shall partake of in London for tomorrow
This moment my dearest Sir I have received your kind letter
If you thought us too dissipated the first week I almost fear to know what you will think of us this secondhowever the Pantheon this evening will probably be the last public place which I shall ever see
The assurance of your support and protection in regard to Madame Duval though what I never doubted excites my utmost gratitude How indeed cherished under your roof the happy object of your constant indulgence how could I have borne to become the slave of her tyrannical humours Pardon me that I speak so hardly of her but whenever the idea of passing my days with her occurs to me the comparison which naturally follows takes from me all that forbearance which I believe I owe her
You are already displeased with Sir Clement to be sure then his behaviour after the opera will not make his peace with you Indeed the more I reflect upon it the more angry I am I was entirely in his power and it was cruel in him to cause me so much terror
O my dearest Sir were I but worthy the prayers and the wishes you offer for me the utmost ambition of my heart would be fully satisfied but I greatly fear you will find me now that I am out of the reach of your assisting prudence more weak and imperfect than you could have expected
I have not now time to write another word for I must immediately hasten to dress for the evening
LETTER XXIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Queen Ann Street Tuesday April 19
THERE is something to me half melancholy in writing an account of our last adventures in London However as this day is merely appropriated to packing and preparations for our journey and as I shall shortly have no more adventures to write I think I may as well complete my town journal at once and when you have it all together I hope my dear Sir you will send me your observations and thoughts upon it to Howard Grove
About eight oclock we went to the Pantheon I was extremely struck with the beauty of the building which greatly surpassed whatever I could have expected or imagined Yet it has more the appearance of a chapel than of a place of diversion and though I was quite charmed with the magnificence of the room I felt that I could not be as gay and thoughtless there as at Ranelagh for there is something in it which rather inspires awe and solemnity than mirth and pleasure However perhaps it may only have this effect upon such a novice as myself
I should have said that our party consisted only of Captain Mrs and
Miss Mirvan as Madame Duval spent the day in the citywhich I own
I could not lament
There was a great deal of company but the first person we saw was Sir Clement Willoughby He addressed us with his usual ease and joined us for the whole evening I felt myself very uneasy in his presence for I could not look at him nor hear him speak without recollecting the chariot adventure but to my great amazement I observed that he looked at me without the least apparent discomposure though certainly he ought not to think of his behaviour without blushing I really wish I had not forgiven him and then he could not have ventured to speak to me any more
There was an exceeding good concert but too much talking to hear it well Indeed I am quite astonished to find how little music is attended to in silence for though every body seems to admire hardly any body listens
We did not see Lord Orville till we went into the tearoom which is large low and under ground and serves merely as a foil to the apartments above he then sat next to us He seemed to belong to a large party chiefly of ladies but among the gentlemen attending them I perceived Mr Lovel
I was extremely irresolute whether or not I ought to make any acknowledgments to Lord Orville for his generous conduct in securing me from the future impertinence of that man and I thought that as he had seemed to allow Mrs Mirvan to acquaint me though no one else of the measures which he had taken he might perhaps suppose me ungrateful if silent however I might have spared myself the trouble of deliberating as I never once had the shadow of an opportunity of speaking unheard by Sir Clement On the contrary he was so exceedingly officious and forward that I could not say a word to any body but instantly he bent his head forward with an air of profound attention as if I had addressed myself wholly to him and yet I never once looked at him and would not have spoken to him on any account
Indeed Mrs Mirvan herself though unacquainted with the behaviour of Sir Clement after the opera says it is not right for a young woman to be seen so frequently in public with the same gentleman and if our stay in town was to be lengthened she would endeavour to represent to the Captain the impropriety of allowing his constant attendance for Sir Clement with all his easiness could not be so eternally of our parties if the Captain was less fond of his company
At the same table with Lord Orville sat a gentlemanI call him so only because he was at the same tablewho almost from the moment I was seated fixed his eyes steadfastly on my face and never once removed them to any other object during teatime notwithstanding my dislike of his staring must I am sure have been very evident I was quite surprised that a man whose boldness was so offensive could have gained admission into a party of which Lord Orville made one for I naturally concluded him to be some lowbred uneducated man and I thought my idea was indubitably confirmed when I heard him say to Sir Clement Willoughby in an audible whisperwhich is a mode of speech very distressing and disagreeable to bystandersFor Heavens sake Willoughby who is that lovely creature
But what was my amazement when listening attentively for the answer though my head was turned another way I heard Sir Clement say I am sorry I cannot inform your Lordship but I am ignorant myself
Lordship how extraordinary that a nobleman accustomed in all probability to the first rank of company in the kingdom from his earliest infancy can possibly be deficient in good manners however faulty in morals and principles Even Sir Clement Willoughby appeared modest in comparison with this person
During tea a conversation was commenced upon the times fashions and public places in which the company of both tables joined It began by Sir Clements inquiring of Miss Mirvan and of me if the Pantheon had answered our expectations
We both readily agreed that it had greatly exceeded them
Ay to be sure said the Captain why you dont suppose theyd confess they didnt like it do you Whatevers the fashion they must like of courseor else Id be bound for it theyd own that there never was such a dull place as this here invented
And has then this building said Lord Orville no merit that may serve to lessen your censure Will not your eye Sir speak something in its favour
Eye cried the Lord I dont know his name and is there any eye here that can find pleasure in looking at dead walls or statues when such heavenly living objects as I now see demand all their admiration
O certainly said Lord Orville the lifeless symmetry of architecture however beautiful the design and proportion no man would be so mad as to put in competition with the animated charms of nature but when as tonight the eye may be regaled at the same time and in one view with all the excellence of art and all the perfection of nature I cannot think that either suffer by being seen together
I grant my Lord said Sir Clement that the cool eye of unimpassioned philosophy may view both with equal attention and equal safety but where the heart is not so well guarded it is apt to interfere and render even to the eye all objects but one insipid and uninteresting
Aye Aye cried the Captain you may talk what you will of your eye here and your eye there and for the matter of that to be sure you have twobut we all know they both squint one way
Far be it from me said Lord Orville to dispute the magnetic power of beauty which irresistibly draws and attracts whatever has soul and sympathy and I am happy to acknowledge that though we have now no gods to occupy a mansion professedly built for them yet we have secured their better halves for we have goddesses to whom we all most willingly bow down And then with a very droll air he made a profound reverence to the ladies
Theyd need to be goddesses with a vengeance said the Captain for theyre mortal dear to look at Howsomever I should be glad to know what you can see in eer a face among them thats worth halfaguinea for a sight
Halfaguinea exclaimed that same Lord I would give half I am worth for a sight of only one provided I make my own choice And prithee how can money be better employed than in the service of fine women
If the ladies of his own party can pardon the Captains speech said
Sir Clement I think he has a fair claim to the forgiveness of all
Then you depend very much as I doubt not but you may said Lord Orville upon the general sweetness of the sexbut as to the ladies of the Captains party they may easily pardon for they cannot be hurt
But they must have a devilish good conceit of themselves though said the Captain to believe all that Howsomever whether or no I should be glad to be told by some of you who seem to be knowing in them things what kind of diversion can be found in such a place as this here for one who has had long ago his full of facehunting
Every body laughed but nobody spoke
Why look you there now continued the Captain youre all at a dead standnot a man among you can answer that there question Why then I must make bold to conclude that you all come here for no manner of purpose but to stare at one anothers pretty facesthough for the matter of that half of em are plaguy uglyand as to tother halfI believe its none of Gods manufactory
What the ladies may come hither for Sir said Mr Lovel stroking his ruffles and looking down it would ill become us to determine but as to we men doubtless we can have no other view than to admire them
If I bent mistaken cried the Captain looking earnestly in
his face
you are that same person we saw at Love for Love tother night
bent you
Mr Lovel bowed
Why then Gentlemen continued he with a loud laugh I must tell you a most excellent good jokewhen all was over as sure as youre alive he asked what the play was Ha ha ha
Sir said Mr Lovel colouring if you were as much used to
townlife as I
amwhich I presume is not precisely the caseI fancy you would
not find so much diversion from a circumstance so common
Common What is it common repeated the Captain why then fore George such chaps are more fit to be sent to school and well disciplined with a catonine tails than to poke their heads into a playhouse Why a play is the only thing left nowadays that has a grain of sense in it for as to all the rest of your public places dye see if they were all put together I wouldnt give that for em snapping his fingers And now were talking of them sort of things theres your operasI should like to know now what any of you can find to say for them
Lord Orville who was most able to have answered seemed by no means to think the Captain worthy an argument upon a subject concerning which he had neither knowledge nor feeling but turning to us he said The ladies are silent and we seem to have engrossed the conversation to ourselves in which we are much more our own enemies than theirs But addressing himself to Miss Mirvan and me I am most desirous to hear the opinions of these young ladies to whom all public places must as yet be new
We both and with eagerness declared that we had received as much if not more pleasure at the opera than any where but we had better have been silent for the Captain quite displeased said What signifies asking them girls Do you think they know their own minds yet Ask em after any thing thats called diversion and youre sure theyll say its vastly finethey are a set of parrots and speak by rote for they all say the same thing but ask em how they like making puddings and pies and Ill warrant youll pose em As to them operas I desire I may hear no more of their liking such nonsense and for you Moll to his daughter I charge you as you value my favour that youll never again be so impertinent as to have a taste of your own before my face There are fools enough in the world without your adding to their number Ill have no daughter of mine affect them sort of megrims It is a shame they ant put down and if Id my will theres not a magistrate in this town but should be knocked on the head for suffering them If youve a mind to praise any thing why you may praise a play and welcome for I like it myself
This reproof effectually silenced us both for the rest of the evening Nay indeed for some minutes it seemed to silence every body else till Mr Lovel not willing to lose an opportunity of returning the Captains sarcasm said Why really Sir it is but natural to be most pleased with what is most familiar and I think of all our diversions there is not one so much in common between us and the country as a play Not a village but has its barns and comedians and as for the stage business why it may be pretty equally done any where and even in regard to us and the canaille confined as we all are within the semicircle of a theatre there is no place where the distinction is less obvious
While the Captain seemed considering for Mr Lovels meaning
Lord Orville
probably with a view to prevent his finding it changed the subject
to Coxs Museum and asked what he thought of it
Thinksaid he why I think as how it int worth thinking
about I like
no such jemcracks It is only fit in my mind for monkeysthough
for aught I know they too might turn up their noses at it
May we ask your Lordships own opinion said Mrs Mirvan
The mechanism answered he is wonderfully ingenioous I am sorry it is turned to no better account but its purport is so frivolous so very remote from all aim at instruction or utility that the sight of so fine a show leaves a regret on the mind that so much work and so much ingenuity should not be better bestowed
The truth is said the Captain that in all this huge town so full as it is of folks of all sorts there int so much as one public place besides the playhouse where a man thats to say a man who is a man ought not to be ashamed to shew his face Tother day they got me to a ridotto but I believe it will be long enough before they get me to another I knew no more what to do with myself than if my ships company had been metamorphosed into Frenchman Then again theres your famous Ranelagh that you make such a fuss aboutwhy what a dull place is thatits the worst of all
Ranelagh dullRanelagh dullwas echoed from mouth to mouth
and all
the ladies as if of one accord regarded the Captain with looks of
the most ironical contempt
As to Ranelagh said Mr Lovell most indubitably though the price is blebian it is by no means adapted to the plebian taste It requires a certain acquaintance with high life andandand something ofofsomething dun vrai gout to be really sensible of its merit Those whosewhose connections and so forth are not among les gens comme il faut can feel nothing but ennui at such a place as Ranelagh
Ranelagh cried Lord O tis the divinest place under heavenor indeedfor aught I know
O you creature cried a pretty but affected young lady patting him with her fan you shant talk so I know what you are going to say but positively I wont sit by you if youre so wicked
And how can one sit by you and be good said he when only to
look at you
is enough to make one wickedor wish to be so
Fie my Lord returned she you really are insufferable I dont
think I
shall speak to you again these seven years
What a metamorphosis cried Lord Orville should you make a
patriarch of
his Lordship
Seven years said he dear Madam be contented with telling me
you will
not speak to me after seven years and I will endeavour to submit
O very well my Lord answered she pray date the end of our speaking to each other as early as you please Ill promise to agree to your time
You know dear Madam said he sipping his tea you know I only
live in
your sight
O yes my Lord I have long known that But I begin to fear we
shall be too
late for Ranelagh this evening
O no Madame said Mr Lovel looking at his watch it is but
just past
ten
No more cried she O then we shall do very well
All the ladies now started up and declared they had no time to lose
Why what the Dl cried the Captain leaning forward with both
his arms
on the table are you going to Ranelagh at this time of night
The ladies looked at one another and smiled
To Ranelagh cried Lord yes and I hope you are going too
for we
cannot possibly excuse these ladies
I go to Ranelaghif I do Ill be
Everybody now stood up and the stranger Lord coming round to me
said You
go I hope
No my Lord I believe not
O you cannot must not be so barbarous And he took my hand and ran on saying such fine speeches and compliments that I might almost have supposed myself a goddess and him a pagan paying me adoration As soon as I possibly could I drew back my hand but he frequently in the course of conversation contrived to take it again though it was extremely disagreeable to me and the more so as I saw that Lord Orville had his eyes fixed upon us with a gravity of attention that made me uneasy
And surely my dear Sir it was a great liberty in this lord not withstanding his rank to treat me so freely As to Sir Clement he seemed in misery
They all endeavoured to prevail with the Captain to join the
Ranelagh party
and this lord told me in a low voice that it was tearing his heart
out to go without me
During this conversation Mr Lovel came forward and assuming a look of surprise made me a bow and inquired how I did protesting upon his honour that he had not seen me before or would have sooner paid his respects to me
Though his politeness was evidently constrained yet I was very glad
to be
thus assured of having nothing more to fear from him
The Captain far from listening to their persuasions of accompanying
them to
Ranelagh was quite in a passion at the proposal and vowed he would
sooner go to the Blackhole in Calcutta
But said Lord if the ladies will take their tea at Ranelagh you may depend upon our seeing them safe home for we shall be proud of the honour of attending them
May be so said the Captain but Ill tell you what if one
of these
places bent enough for them tonight why tomorrow they shall go
to neer a one
We instantly declared ourselves ready to go home
It is not for yourselves that we petition said Lord But for us if you have any charity you will not be so cruel as to deny us we only beg you to prolong our happiness for a few minutesthe favour is but a small one for you to grant though so great a one for us to receive
To tell you a piece of my mind said the Captain surlily I think you might as well not give the girls so much of this palaver theyll take it all for gospel As to Moll why shes well enough but nothing extraordinary though perhaps you may persuade her that her pug nose is all the fashion and as to the other why shes good white and red to be sure but what of thatIll warrant shell moulder away as fast as her neighbours
Is there cried Lord another man in this place who seeing such objects could make such a speech
As to that there returned the Captain I dont know whether there be or no and to make free I dont care for I shant go for to model myself by any of these fairweather chaps who dare not so much as say their souls are their ownand for aught I know no more they bent Im almost as much ashamed of my countrymen as if I was a Frenchman and I believe in my heart there int a pin to choose between them and before long we shall hear the very sailors talking that lingo and see never a swabber without a bag and a sword
He he hewell pon honour cried Mr Lovel you gentlemen of
the ocean
have a most severe way of judging
Severe fore George that is impossible for to cut the matter short the men as they call themselves are no better than monkeys and as to the women why they are mere dolls So now youve got my opinion of this subject and I so wish you good night
The ladies who were very impatient to be gone made their courtsies and tripped away followed by all the gentlemen of their party except the lord before mentioned and Lord Orville who stayed to make inquiries of Mrs Mirvan concerning our leaving town and then saying with his usual politeness something civil to each of us with a very grave air he quitted us
Lord remained some minutes longer which he spent in making a profusion of compliments to me by which he prevented my hearing distinctly what Lord Orville said to my great vexation especially as he lookedI thought so at leastas if displeased at his particularity of behaviour to me
In going to an outward room to wait for the carriage I walked and could not possibly avoid it between this nobleman and Sir Clement Willoughby and when the servant said the coach stopped the way though the latter offered me his hand which I should much have preferred this same lord without any ceremony took mine himself and Sir Clement with a look extremely provoked conducted Mrs Mirvan
In all ranks and all stations of life how strangely do characters and manners differ Lord Orville with a politeness which knows no intermission and makes no distinction is as unassuming and modest as if he had never mixed with the great and was totally ignorant of every qualification he possesses this other lord though lavish of compliments and fine speeches seems to me an entire stranger to real goodbreeding whoever strikes his fancy engrosses his whole attention He is forward and bold has an air of haughtiness towards men and a look of libertinism towards woman and his conscious quality seems to have given him a freedom in his way of speaking to either sex that is very little short of rudeness
When we returned home we were all lowspirited The evenings
entertainment
had displeased the Captain and his displeasure I believe
disconcerted us all
And here I thought to have concluded my letter but to my great surprise just now we had a visit from Lord Orville He called he said to pay his respects to us before we left town and made many inquiries concerning our return and when Mrs Mirvan told him we were going into the country without any view of again quitting it he expressed concern in such termsso polite so flattering so seriousthat I could hardly forbear being sorry for myself Were I to go immediately to Berry Hill I am sure I should feel nothing but joybut now we are joined by this Captain and Madame Duval I must own I expect very little pleasure at Howard Grove
Before Lord Orville went Sir Clement Willoughby called He was more grave than I had ever seen him and made several attempts to speak to me in a low voice and to assure me that his regret upon the occasion of our journey was entirely upon my account But I was not in spirits and could not bear to be teased by him However he has so well paid his court to Captain Mirvan that he gave him a very hearty invitation to the Grove At this he brightenedand just then Lord Orville took leave
No doubt but he was disgusted at this illtimed illbred partiality for surely it was very wrong to make an invitation before Lord Orville in which he was not included I was so much chagrined that as soon as he went I left the room and I shall not go down stairs till Sir Clement is gone
Lord Orville cannot but observe his assiduous endeavours to ingratiate himself into my favour and does not this extravagant civility of Captain Mirvan give him reason to suppose that it meets with our general approbation I cannot thimk upon this subject without inexpressible uneasiness and yet I can think of nothing else
Adieu my dearest Sir Pray write to me immediately How many long letters has this one short fortnight produced More than I may probably ever write again I fear I shall have tired you with reading them but you will now have time to rest for I shall find but little to say in future
And now most honoured Sir with all the follies and imperfections
which I
have thus faithfully recounted can you and with unabated kindness
suffer me to sign myself Your dutiful and most affectionate EVELINA
LETTER XXIV
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill April 22
HOW much do I rejoice that I can again address my letters to Howard Grove My Evelina would have grieved had she known the anxiety of my mind during her residence in the great world My apprehensions have been inexpressibly alarming and your journal at once exciting and relieving my fears has almost wholly occupied me since the time of your dating it from London
Sir Clement Willoughby must be an artful designing man I am extremely irritated at his conduct The passion he pretends for you has neither sincerity nor honour the manner and the opportunities he has chosen to declare it are bordering upon insult
His unworthy behaviour after the opera convinces me that had not your vehemence frightened him Queen Ann Street would have been the last place whither he would have ordered his chariot O my child how thankful am I for your escape I need not now I am sure enlarge upon your indiscretion and want of thought in so hastily trusting yourself with a man so little known to you and whose gaiety and flightiness should have put you on your guard
The nobleman you met at the Pantheon bold and forward as you describe him to be gives me no apprehension a man who appears so openly licentious and who makes his attack with so little regard to decorum is one who to a mind such as my Evelinas can never be seen but with the disgust which his manners ought to excite
But Sir Clement though he seeks occasion to give real offence contrives to avoid all appearance of intentional evil He is far more dangerous because more artful but I am happy to observe that he seems to have made no impression upon your heart and therefore a very little care and prudence may secure you from those designs which I fear he has formed
Lord Orville appears to be of a better order of beings His spirited conduct to the meanly impertinent Lovel and his anxiety for you after the opera prove him to be a man of sense and feeling Doubtless he thought there was much reason to tremble for your safety while exposed to the power of Sir Clement and he acted with a regard to real honour that will always incline me to think well of him in so immediately acquainting the Mirvan family with your situation Many men of this age from a false and pretended delicacy to a friend would have quietly pursued their own affairs and thought it more honourable to leave an unsuspecting young creature to the mercy of a libertine than to risk his displeasure by taking measures for her security
Your evident concern at leaving London is very natural and yet it afflicts me I ever dreaded your being too much pleased with a life of dissipation which youth and vivacity render but too alluring and I almost regret the consent for your journey which I had not the resolution to withhold
Alas my child the artfulness of your nature and the simplicity of your education alike unfit you for the thorny paths of the great and busy world The supposed obscurity of your birth and situation makes you liable to a thousand disagreeable adventures Not only my views but my hopes for your future life have ever centered in the country Shall I own to you that however I may differ from Captain Mirvan in other respects yet my opinion of the town its manners inhabitants and diversions is much upon upon a level with his own Indeed it is the general harbour of fraud and of folly of duplicity and of impertinence and I wish few things more fervently than that you may have taken a lasting leave of it
Remember however that I only speak in regard to a public and
dissipated
life in private families we may doubtless find as much goodness
honesty and virtue in London as in the country
If contented with a retired station I still hope I shall live to see my Evelina the ornament of her neighbourhood and the pride and delight of her family and giving and receiving joy from such society as may best deserve her affection and employing herself in such useful and innocent occupations as may secure and merit the tenderest love of her friends and the worthiest satisfaction of her own heart Such are my hopes and such have been my expectations Disappointment them not my beloved child but cheer me with a few lines that may assure me this one short fortnight spent in town has not undone the work of seventeen years spent in the country ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER XXV
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove April 25
NO my dear Sir no the work of seventeen years remains such as it was ever unworthy your time and your labour but not more so nowat least I hope notthan before that fortnight which has so much alarmed you
And yet I must confess that I am not half so happy here at present as I was ere I went to town but the change is in the place not in me Captain Mirvan and Madame Duval have ruined Howard Grove The harmony that reigned here is disturbed our schemes are broken our way of life is altered and our comfort is destroyed But do not suppose London to be the source of these evils for had our excursion been any where else so disagreeable an addition to our household must have caused the same change at our return
I was sure you would be displeased with Sir Clement Willoughby and therefore I am by no means surprised at what you say of him but for Lord OrvilleI must own I had greatly feared that my weak and imperfect account would not have procured him the good opinion which he so well deserves and which I am delighted to find you seem to have of him O Sir could I have done justice to the merit of which I believe him posessedcould I have painted him to you such as he appeared to methen indeed you would have had some idea of the claim which he has to your approbation
After the last letter which I wrote in town nothing more passed previous to our journey hither except a very violent quarrel between Captain Mirvan and Madame Duval As the Captain intended to travel on horseback he had settled that we four females should make use of his coach Madame Duval did not come to Queen Ann Street till the carriage had waited some time at the door and then attended by Monsieur Du Bois she made her appearance
The Captain impatient to be gone would not suffer them to enter the house but insisted that we should immediately get into the coach We obeyed but were no sooner seated than Madame Duval said Come Monsieur Du Bois these girls can make very good room for you sit closer children
Mrs Mirvan looked quite confounded and M Du Bois after making some apologies about crowding us actually got into the coach on the side with Miss Mirvan and me But no sooner was he seated than the Captain who had observed this transaction very quietly walked up to the coach door saying What neither with your leave nor by your leave
M Du Bois seemed rather shocked and began to make abundance of excuses but the Captain neither understood nor regarded him and very roughly said Lookee Monseer this here may be a French fashion for aught I knowbut give and take is fair in all nations and so now dye see Ill make bold to show you an English one
And then seizing his wrist he made him jump out of the coach
M Du Bois instantly put his hand upon his sword and threatened to resent this indignity The Captain holding up his stick bid him draw at his peril Mrs Mirvan greatly alarmed got out of the coach and standing between them intreated her husband to reenter the house
None of your clack cried he angrily what the Dl do you
suppose I
cant manage a Frenchman
Meantime Madame Duval called out to M Du Bois Eh laissezle
mon ami ne
le corrigez pas cest une villaine bete qui nen vaut pas la peine
Monsieur le Capitaine cried M Du Bois voulezvous bien ne demander pardon
O ho you demand pardon do you said the Captain I thought as
much I
thought youd come toso you have lost your relish for an English
salutation have you strutting up to him with looks of defiance
A crowd was now gathering and Mrs Mirvan again besought her husband
to go
into the house
Why what a plague is the woman afraid ofDid you ever know
a Frenchman
that could not take an affrontI warrant Monseer knows what he is
aboutdont you Monseer
M Du Bois not understanding him only said plaitil Monsieur
No nor dish me neither answered the Captain but be that as
it may
what signifies our parleying here If youve any thing to propose
speak at once if not why let us go on our journey without more ado
Parbleu je nentends rien moi cried M Du Bois shrugging up his
shoulders and looking very dismal
Mrs Mirvan then advanced to him and said in French that she was sure the Captain had not any intention to affront him and begged he would desist from a dispute which could only be productive of mutual misunderstanding as neither of them knew the language of the other
This sensible remonstrance had the desired effect and M Du Bois
making a
bow to every one except the Captain very wisely gave up the point
and took leave
We then hoped to proceed quietly on our journey but the turbulent Captain would not yet permit us He approached Madame Duval with an exulting air and said Why hows this Madame what has your champion deserted you why I thought you told me that you old gentlewomen had it all your own way among them French sparks
As to that Sir answered she its not of no consequence what you thought for a person who can behave in such a low way may think what he pleases for me for I shant mind
Why then Mistress since you must needs make so free cried he
please to
tell me the reason you took the liberty for to ask any of your
followers into my coach without my leave Answer me to that
Why then pray Sir returned she tell me the reaon why you took the liberty to treat the gentleman in such an unpolite way as to take and pull him neck and heels out Im sure he hadnt done nothing to affront you nor nobody else and I dont know what great hurt he would have done you by just sitting still in the coach he would not have eat it
What do you think then that my horses have nothing to do but
to carry
about your snivelling Frenchmen If you do Madam I must make bold
to tell you you are out for Ill see em hangd first
More brute you then For theyve never carried nobody half so good
Why lookee Madam if you must needs provoke me Ill tell you a piece of my mind you must know I can see as far into a millstone as another man and so if you thought for to fob me off with another one of your smirking French puppies for a soninlaw why youll find yourself in a hobble thats all
Sir youre abut I wont say whatbut I protest I hadnt no such a thought no more hadnt Monsieur Du Bois
My dear said Mrs Mirvan we shall be very late
Well well answered he get away then off with you as fast as
you can
its high time As to Molly shes fine lady enough in all conscience
I want none of your French chaps to make her worse
And so saying he mounted his horse and we drove off And I could
not but
think with regret of the different feelings we experienced upon
leaving London to what had belonged to our entering it
During the journey Madame Duval was so very violent against the
Captain that
she obliged Mrs Mirvan to tell her that when in her presence
she must beg her to choose some other subject of discourse
We had a most affectionate reception from Lady Howard whose
kindness and
hospitality cannot fail of making every body happy who is disposed
so to be
Adieu my dearest Sir I hope though I have hitherto neglected
to mention
it that you have always remembered me to whoever has made any inquiry
concerning me
LETTER XXVI
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove April 27
O MY dear Sir I now write in the greatest uneasiness Madame Duval has made a proposal which terrifies me to death and which was as unexpected as it is shocking
She had been employed for some hours this afternoon in reading letters from London and just about teatime she sent for me into her room and said with a look of great satisfaction Come here child Ive got some very good news to tell you something that will surprise you Ill give you my word for you hant no notion of it
I begged her to explain herself and then in terms which I cannot repeat she said she had been considering what a shame it was to see me such a poor country shamefaced thing when I ought to be a fine lady and that she had long and upon several occasions blushed for me though she must own the fault was none of mine for nothing better could be expected from a girl who had been so immured However she assured me she had at length hit upon a plan which would make quite another creature of me
I waited without much impatience to hear what this preface led to but I was soon awakened to more lively sensations when she aquainted me that her intention was to prove my birthright and to claim by law the inheritance of my real family
It would be impossible for me to express my extreme consternation when she thus unfolded her scheme My surprise and terror were equally great I could say nothing I heard her with a silence which I had not the power to break
She then expatiated very warmly upon the advantages I should reap from her plan talked in a high style of my future grandeur assured me how heartily I should despise almost every body and every thing I had hitherto seen predicted my marrying into some family of the first rank in the kingdom and finally said I should spend a few months in Paris where my education and manners might receive their last polish
She enlarged also upon the delight she should have in common
with myself
from mortifying the pride of certain people and showing them that
she was not to be slighted with impunity
In the midst of this discourse I was relieved by a summons to tea Madame Duval was in great spirits but my emotion was too painful for concealment and every body enquired into the cause I would fain have waived the subject but Madame Duval was determined to make it public She told tham that she had it in her head to make something of me and that they should soon call me by another name than that of Anville and yet that she was not going to have the child married neither
I could not endure to hear her proceed and was going to leave the room which when Lady Howard perceived she begged Madame Duval would defer her intelligence to some other opportunity but she was so eager to communicate her scheme that she could bear no delay and therefore they suffered me to go without opposition Indeed whenever my situation or affairs are mentioned by Madame Duval she speaks of them with such bluntness and severity that I cannot be enjoined a task more cruel than to hear her
I was afterwards accquainted with some particulars of the conversation by Miss Mirvan who told me that Madame Duval informed them of her plan wih the utmost complacency and seemed to think herself very fortunate in having suggested it but soon after she accidentally betrayed that she had been instigated to the scheme by her relations the Branghtons whose letters which she received today first mentioned the proposal She declared that she would have nothing to do with any roundabout ways but go openly and instantly to law in order to prove my birth real name and title to the estate of my ancestors
How impertinent and officious in these Branghtons to interfere thus in my concerns You can hardly imagine what a disturbance this plan has made in the family The Captain without enquiring into any particulars of the affair has peremptorily declared himself against it merely because it has been proposed by Madame Duval and they have battled the point together with great violence Mrs Mirvan says she will not even think till she hears your opinion But Lady Howard to my great surprise openly avows her appprobation of Madame Duvals intention however she will write her reasons and sentiments upon the subject to you herself
As to Miss Mirvan she is my second self and neither hopes nor fears but as I do And as to meI know not what to say nor even what to wish I have often thought my fate peculiarly cruel to have but one parent and from that one to be banished for everwhile on the other side I have but too well known and felt the propriety of the separation And yet you may much better imagine than I can express the internal anguish which sometimes oppresses my heart when I reflect upon the strange indifference that must occasion a father never to make the least enquiry after the health the welfare or even the life of his child
O Sir to me the loss is nothinggreatly sweetly and most benevolently have you guarded me from feeling it but for him I grieve indeedI must be divested not merely of all filial piety but of all humanity could I ever think upon this subject and not be wounded to the soul
Again I must repeat I know not what to wish think for me therefore my dearest Sir and suffer my doubting mind that knows not which way to direct its hopes to be guided by your wisdom and unerring counsel EVELINA
LETTER XXVII
LADY HOWARD TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove
Dear Sir
I CANNOT give a greater proof of the high opinion I have of your candour than by the liberty I am now going to take of presuming to offer you advice upon a subject concerning which you have so just a claim to act for yourself but I know you have too unaffected a love of justice to be partially tenacious of your own judgment
Madame Duval has been proposing a scheme which has put us all in commotion and against which at first in common with the rest of my family I exclaimed but upon more mature consideration I own my objections have almost wholly vanished
This scheme is no other than to commence a lawsuit with Sir John Belmont to prove the validity of his marriage with Miss Evelyn the necessary consequence of which proof will be securing his fortune and estate to his daughter
And why my dear Sir should not this be I know that upon first hearing such a plan conveys ideas that must shock you but I know too that your mind is superior to being governed by prejudices or to opposing any important cause on account of a few disagreeable attendant circumstances
Your lovely charge now first entering into life has merit which ought not to be buried in obscurity She seems born for an ornament to the world Nature has been bountiful to her of whatever she had to bestow and the peculiar attention you have given to her education has formed her mind to a degree of excellence that in one so young I have scarce ever seen equalled Fortune alone has hitherto been sparing of her gifts and she too now opens the way which leads to all that is left to wish for her
What your reasons may have been my good Sir for so carefully concealing the birth name and pretensions of this amiable girl and forbearing to make any claim upon Sir John Belmont I am totally a stranger to but without knowing I respect them from the high opinion that I have of your character and judgment but I hope they are not insuperable for I cannot but think that it was never designed for one who seems meant to grace the world to have her life devoted to retirement
Surely Sir John Belmont wretch as he has shown himself could never see his accomplished daughter and not be proud to own her and eager to secure her the inheritance of his fortune The admiration she met with in town though merely the effect of her external attractions was such that Mrs Mirvan assures me she would have had the most splendid offers had there not seemed to be some mystery in regard to her birth which she was well informed was assiduously though vainly endeavoured to be discovered
Can it be right my dear Sir that this promising young creature should be deprived of the fortune and rank of life to which she is lawfully entitled and which you have prepared her to support and to use so nobly To despise riches may indeed be philosophic but to dispense them worthily must surely be more beneficial to mankind
Perhaps a few years or indeed a much shorter time may make this scheme impracticable Sir John tho yet young leads a life too dissipated for long duration and when too late we may regret that something was not sooner done for it will be next to impossible after he is gone to settle or prove anything with his heirs and executors
Pardon the earnestness with which I write my sense of this affair but your charming ward has made me so warmly her friend that I cannot be indifferent upon a subject of such importance to her future life
Adieu my dear Sirsend me speedily an answer to this remonstrance and believe me to be c M HOWARD
LETTER XXVIII
MR VILLARS TO LADY HOWARD Berry Hill May 2
YOUR letter Madam has opened a source of anxiety to which I look forward with dread and which to see closed I scarcely dare expect I am unwilling to oppose my opinion to that of your Ladyship nor indeed can I but by arguments which I believe will rather rank me as a hermit ignorant of the world and fit only for my cell than as a proper guardian in an age such as this for an accomplished young woman Yet thus called upon it behoves me to explain and endeavour to vindicate the reasons by which I have been hitherto guided
The mother of this dear childwho was led to destruction by her own imprudence the hardness of heart of Madame Duval and the villany of Sir John Belmontwas once what her daughter is now the best beloved of my heart and her memory so long as my own holds I shall love mourn and honour On the fatal day that her gentle soul left its mansion and not many hours ere she ceased to breathe I solemnly plighted my faith That her child if it lived should know no father but myself or her acknowledged husband
You cannot Madam suppose that I found much difficulty in adhering to this promise and forbearing to make any claim upon Sir John Belmont Could I feel an affection the most paternal for this poor sufferer and not abominate her destroyer Could I wish to deliver to him who had so basely betrayed the mother the helpless and innocent offspring who born in so much sorrow seemed entitled to all the compassionate tenderness of pity
For many years the name alone of that man accidentally spoken in my hearing almost divested me of my Christianity and scarce could I forbear to execrate him Yet I sought not neither did I desire to deprive him of his child had he with any appearance of contrition or indeed of humanity endeavoured to become less unworthy such a blessingbut he is a stranger to all parental feelings and has with a savage insensibility forborne to enquire even into the existence of this sweet orphan though the situation of his injured wife was but too well known to him
You wish to be acquainted with my intentionsI must acknowledge they were such as I now perceive would not be honoured with your Ladyships approbation for though I have sometimes thought of presenting Evelina to her father and demanding the justice which is her due yet at other times I have both disdained and feared the application disdained lest it should be refused and feared lest it should be accepted
Lady Belmont who was firmly persuaded of her approaching dissolution frequently and earnestly besought me that if her infant was a female I would not abandon her to the direction of a man so wholly unfit to take the charge of her education but should she be importunately demanded that I would retire with her abroad and carefully conceal her from Sir John till some apparent change in his sentiments and conduct should announce him less improper for such a trust And often would she say Should the poor babe have any feelings correspondent with its mothers it will have no want while under your protection Alas she had no sooner quitted it herself than she was plunged into a gulph of misery that swallowed up her peace reputation and life
During the childhood of Evelina I suggested a thousand plans for the security of her birthrightbut I as many times rejected them I was in a perpetual conflict between the desire that she should have justice done her and the apprehension that while I improved her fortune I should endanger her mind However as her character began to be formed and her disposition to be displayed my perplexity abated the road before me seemed less thorny and intricate and I thought I could perceive the right path from the wrong for when I observed the artless openness the ingenuous simplicity of her nature when I saw that her guileless and innocent soul fancied all the world to be pure and disinterested as herself and that her heart was open to every impression with which love pity or art might assail itthen did I flatter myself that to follow my own inclination and to secure her welfare was the same thing since to expose her to the snares and dangers inevitably encircling a house of which the master is dissipated and unprincipled without the guidance of a mother or any prudent and sensible female seemed to me no less than suffering her to stumble into some dreadful pit when the sun is in its meridian My plan therefore was not merely to educate and to cherish her as my own but to adopt her the heiress of my small fortune and to bestow her upon some worthy man with whom she might spend her days in tranquility cheerfulness and goodhumour untainted by vice folly or ambition
So much for the time past Such have been the motives by which I have been governed and I hope they will be allowed not merely to account for but also to justify the conduct which has resulted from them It now remains to speak of the time to come
And here indeed I am sensible of difficulties which I almost despair of surmounting according to my wishes I pay the highest deference to your Ladyships opinion which it is extremely painful to me not to concur withyet I am so well acquainted with your goodness that I presume to hope it would not be absolutely impossible for me to offer such arguments as might lead you to think with me that this young creatures chance of happiness seems less doubtful in retirement than it would be in the gay and dissipated world But why should I perplex your Ladyship with reasoning that can turn to so little account for alas what arguments what persuasions can I make use of with any prospect of success to such a woman as Madame Duval Her character and the violence of her disposition intimidate me from making the attempt she is too ignorant for instruction too obstinate for intreaty and too weak for reason
I will not therefore enter into a contest from which I have nothing to expect but altercation and impertinence As soon would I discuss the effect of sound with the deaf or the nature of colours with the blind as aim at illuminating with conviction a mind so warped by prejudice so much the slave of unruly and illiberal passions Unused as she is to control persuasion would but harden and opposition incense her I yield therefore to the necessity which compels my reluctant acquiescence and shall now turn all my thoughts upon considering of such methods for the conducting this enterprise as may be most conducive to the happiness of my child and least liable to wound her sensibility
The lawsuit therefore I wholly and absolutely disapprove
Will you my dear Madam forgive the freedom of an old man if I own myself greatly surprised that you could even for a moment listen to a plan so violent so public so totally repugnant to all female delicacy I am satisfied your Ladyship has not weighed this project There was a time indeed when to assert the innocence of Lady Belmont and to blazon to the world the wrongs not guilt by which she suffered I proposed nay attempted a similar plan but then all assistance and encouragement was denied How cruel to the remembrance I bear of her woes is this tardy resentment of Madame Duval She was deaf to the voice of Nature though she has hearkened to that of Ambition
Never can I consent to have this dear and timid girl brought forward to the notice of the world by such a method a method which will subject her to all the impertinence of curiosity the sneers of conjecture and the stings of ridicule And for whatthe attainment of wealth which she does not want and the gratification of vanity which she does not feel A child to appear against a fatherno Madam old and infirm as I am I would even yet sooner convey her myself to some remote part of the world though I were sure of dying in the expedition
Far different had been the motives which would have stimulated her unhappy mother to such a proceeding all her felicity in this world was irretrievably lost her life was become a burthen to her and her fair fame which she had early been taught to prize above all other things had received a mortal wound therefore to clear her own honour and to secure from blemish the birth of her child was all the good which fortune had reserved herself the power of bestowing But even this last consolation was withheld from her
Let milder measures be adopted andsince it must be solet application be made to Sir John Belmont but as to a lawsuit I hope upon this subject never more to hear it mentioned
With Madame Duval all pleas of delicacy would be ineffectual her scheme must be opposed by arguments better suited to her understanding I will not therefore talk of its impropriety but endeavour to prove its inutility Have the goodness then to tell her that her own intentions would be frustrated by her plan since should the lawsuit be commenced and even should the cause be gained Sir John Belmont would still have it in his power and if irritated no doubt in his inclination to cut off her granddaughter with a shilling
She cannot do better herself than to remain quiet and inactive in the affair the long and mutual animosity between her and Sir John will make her interference merely productive of debates and illwill Neither would I have Evelina appear till summoned And as to myself I must wholly decline acting though I will with unwearied zeal devote all my thoughts to giving counsel but in truth I have neither inclination nor spirits adequate to engaging personally with this man
My opinion is that he would pay more respect to a letter from your Ladyship upon this subject than from any other person I therefore advise and hope that you will yourself take the trouble of writing to him in order to open the affair When he shall be inclined to see Evelina I have for him a posthumous letter which his much injured lady left to be presented to him if ever such a meeting should take place
The views of the Branghtons in suggesting this scheme are obviously interested They hope by securing to Evelina the fortune of her father to induce Madame Duval to settle her own upon themselves In this however they would probably be mistaken for little minds have ever a propensity to bestow their wealth upon those who are already in affluence and therefore the less her grandchild requires her assistance the more gladly she will give it
I have but one thing more to add from which however I can by no means recede my word so solemnly given to Lady Belmont that her child should never be owned but with her self must be inviolably adhered to I am dear Madam with great respect Your Ladyships most obedient servant ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER XXIX
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill May 2
HOW sincerely do I sympathise in the uneasiness and concern which my beloved Evelina has so much reason to feel The cruel scheme in agitation is equally repugnant to my judgment and my inclinationyet to oppose it seems impracticable To follow the dictates of my own heart I should instantly recall you to myself and never more consent to your being separated from me but the manners and opinion of the world demand a different conduct Hope however for the best and be satisfied you shall meet with no indignity if you are not received into your own family as you ought to be and with the distinction that is your due you shall leave it for ever and once again restored to my protection secure your own tranquillity and make as you have hitherto done all the happiness of my life ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER XXX
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove May 6
THE die is thrown and I attend the event in trembling Lady Howard has written to Paris and sent her letter to town to be forwarded in the ambassadors packet and in less than a fortnight therefore she expects an answer O Sir with what anxious impatience shall I wait its arrival upon it seems to depend the fate of my future life My solicitude is so great and my suspense so painful that I cannot rest a moment in peace or turn my thoughts into any other channel
Deeply interested as I now am in the event most sincerely do I regret that the plan was ever proposed Methinks it cannot end to my satisfaction for either I must be torn from the arms of my more than fatheror I must have the misery of being finally convinced that I am cruelly rejected by him who has the natural claim to that dear title which to write mention or think of fills my whole soul with filial tenderness
The subject is discussed here eternally Captain Mirvan and Madame Duval as usual quarrel whenever it is started but I am so wholly engrossed by my own reflections that I cannot even listen to them My imagination changes the scene perpetually one moment I am embraced by a kind and relenting parent who takes me to that heart from which I have hitherto been banished and supplicates through me peace and forgiveness from the ashes of my motherat another he regards me with detestation considers me as the living image of an injured saint and repulses me with horrorBut I will not afflict you with the melancholy phantasms of my brain I will endeavour to compose my mind to a more tranquil state and forbear to write again till I have in some measure succeeded
May Heaven bless you my dearest Sir and long long may it continue you on earth to bless Your grateful EVELINA
LETTER XXXI
LADY HOWARD TO SIR JOHN BELMONT BART Howard Grove May 5
Sir
YOU will doubtless be surprised at receiving a letter from one who had for so short a period the honour of your acquaintance and that at so great a distance of time but the motive which has induced me to take this liberty is of so delicate a nature that were I to commence making apologies for my officiousness I fear my letter would be too long for your patience
You have probably already conjectured the subject upon which I mean to treat My regard for Mr Evelyn and his amiable daughter was well known to you nor can I ever cease to be interested in whatever belongs to their memory or family
I must own myself somewhat distressed in what manner to introduce the purport of my writing yet as I think that in affairs of this kind frankness is the first requisite to a good understanding between the parties concerned I will neither torment you nor myself with punctilious ceremonies but proceed instantly and openly to the business which occasions my giving you this trouble
I presume Sir it would be superfluous to tell you that your child resides still in Dorsetshire and is still under the protection of the Reverend Mr Villars in whose house she was born for though no enquiries concerning her have reached his ears or mine I can never suppose it possible you have forborne to make them It only remains therefore to tell you that your daughter is now grown up that she has been educated with the utmost care and the utmost success and that she is now a most deserving accomplished and amiable young woman
Whatever may be your view for her future destination in life it seems time to declare it She is greatly admired and I doubt not will be very much sought after it is proper therefore that her future expectations and your pleasure concerning her should be made known
Believe me Sir she merits your utmost attention and regard You could not see and know her and remain unmoved by those sensations of affection which belong to so near and tender a relationship She is the lovely resemblance of her lovely motherpardon Sir the liberty I take in mentioning that unfortunate lady but I think it behoves me upon this occasion to shew the esteem I felt for her allow me therefore to say and be not offended at my freedom that the memory of that excellent lady has but too long remained under the aspersions of calumny surely it is time to vindicate her fameand how can that be done in a manner more eligible more grateful to her friends or more honourable to yourself than by openly receiving as your child the daughter of the late Lady Belmont
The venerable man who has had the care of her education deserves your warmest acknowledgments for the unremitting pains he has taken and the attention he has shewn in the discharge of his trust Indeed she has been peculiarly fortunate in meeting with such a friend and guardian a more worthy man or one whose character seems nearer to perfection does not exist
Permit me to assure you Sir she will amply repay whatever regard and favour you may hereafter shew her by the comfort and happiness you cannot fail to find in her affection and duty To be owned properly by you is the first wish of her heart and I am sure that to merit your approbation will be the first study of her life
I fear that you will think this address impertinent but I must rest upon the goodness of my intention to plead my excuse I am Sir Your most obedient humble servant M HOWARD
LETTER XXXII
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove Kent May 10
OUR house has been enlivened today by the arrival of a London visitor and the necessity I have been under of concealing the uneasiness of my mind has made me exert myself so effectually that I even think it is really diminished or at least my thoughts are not so totally so very anxiously occupied by one subject only as they lately were
I was strolling this morning with Miss Mirvan down a lane about a mile from the Grove when we heard the trampling of horses and fearing the narrowness of the passage we were turning hastily back but stopped upon hearing a voice call out Pray Ladies dont be frightened for I will walk my horse We turned again and then saw Sir Clement Willoughby He dismounted and approaching us with the reins in his hand presently recollected us Good Heaven cried he with his usual quickness do I see Miss Anville and you too Miss Mirvan
He immediately ordered his servant to take charge of his horse and then advancing to us took a hand of each which he pressed to his lips and said a thousand fine things concerning his good fortune our improved looks and the charms of the country when inhabited by such rural deities The town Ladies has languished since your absenceor at least I have so much languished myself as to be absolutely insensible to all it had to offer One refreshing breeze such as I now enjoy awakens me to new vigour life and spirit But I never before had the good luck to see the country in such perfection
Has not almost every body left town Sir said Miss Mirvan
I am ashamed to answer you Madambut indeed it is as full as ever and will continue so till after the birthday However you Ladies were so little seen that there are but few who know what it has lost For my own part I felt it too sensibly to be able to endure the place any longer
Is there any body remaining there that we were acquainted with cried I
O yes Maam And then he named two or three persons we have seen when with him but he did not mention Lord Orville and I would not ask him lest he should think me curious Perhaps if he stays here some time he may speak of him by accident
He was proceeding in this complimentary style when we were met by the Captain who no sooner perceived Sir Clement than he hastened up to him gave him a hearty shake of the hand a cordial slap on the back and some other equally gentle tokens of satisfaction assuring him of his great joy at his visit and declaring he was as glad to see him as if he had been a messenger who brought news that a French ship was sunk Sir Clement on the other side expressed himself with equal warmth and protested he had been so eager to pay his respects to Captain Mirvan that he had left London in its full lustre and a thousand engagements unanswered merely to give himself that pleasure
We shall have rare sport said the Captain for do you know the old Frenchwoman is among us Fore George I have scarce made any use of her yet by reason I have had nobody with me that could enjoy a joke howsomever it shall go hard but well have some diversion now
Sir Clement very much approved of the proposal and we then went into the house where he had a very grave reception from Mrs Mirvan who is by no means pleased with his visit and a look of much discontent from Madame Duval who said to me in a low voice Id as soon have seen Old Nick as that man for hes the most impertinentest person in the world and isnt never of my side
The Captain is now actually occupied in contriving some scheme which he says is to pay the old Dowager off and so eager and delighted is he at the idea that he can scarcely restrain his raptures sufficiently to conceal his design even from herself I wish however since I do not dare put Madame Duval upon her guard that he had the delicacy not to acquaint me with his intention
LETTER XXXIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION May 13th
THE Captains operations are begunand I hope ended for indeed poor Madame Duval has already but too much reason to regret Sir Clements visit to Howard Grove
Yesterday morning during breakfast as the Captain was reading the newspaper Sir Clement suddenly begged to look at it saying he wanted to know if there was any account of a transaction at which he had been present the evening before his journey hither concerning a poor Frenchman who had got into a scrape which might cost him his life
The Captain demanded particulars and then Sir Clement told a long story of being with a party of country friends at the Tower and hearing a man call out for mercy in French and that when he inquired into the occasion of his distress he was informed that he had been taken up upon suspicion of treasonable practices against the government The poor fellow continued he no sooner found that I spoke French than he besought me to hear him protesting that he had no evil designs that he had been but a short time in England and only waited the return of a lady from the country to quit it for ever
Madame Duval changed colour and listened with the utmost attention
Now though I by no means approve of so many foreigners continually flocking into our country added he addressing himself to the Captain yet I could not help pitying the poor wretch because he did not know enough of English to make his defence however I found it impossible to assist him for the mob would not suffer me to interfere In truth I am afraid he was but roughly handled
Why did they duck him said the Captain
Something of that sort answered he
So much the better so much the better cried the Captain an impudent French puppy Ill bet you what you will he was a rascal I only wish all his countrymen were served the same
I wish you had been in his place with all my soul cried Madame Duval warmlybut pray Sir didnt nobody know who this poor gentleman was
Why I did hear his name answered Sir Clement but I cannot recollect it
It wasntit wasntDu Bois stammered out Madame Duval
The very name answered he yes Du Bois I remember it now
Madame Duvals cup fell from her hand as she repeated Du
Bois Monsieur Du Bois did you say
Du Bois why thats my friend cried the Captain thats Monseer
Slippery int itWhy hes plaguy fond of sousing work howsomever
Ill be sworn they gave him his fill of it
And Ill be sworn cried Madame Duval that youre abut I dont believe nothing about it so you neednt be so overjoyed for I dare say it was no more Monsieur Du Bois than I am
I thought at the time said Sir Clement very gravely that I had seen the gentleman before and now I recollect I think it was in company with you Madame
With me Sir cried Madame Duval
Say you so said the Captain why then it must be he as sure as youre aliveWell but my good friend what will they do with poor Monseer
It is difficult to say answered Sir Clement very thoughtfully but I should suppose that if he has not good friends to appear for him he will be in a very unpleasant situation for these are serious sorts of affairs
Why do you think theyll hang him demanded the Captain
Sir Clement shook his head but made no answer
Madame Duval could no longer contain her agitation she started from her chair repeating with a voice halfchoked Hang himthey cantthey shantlet them at their perilHowever its all false and I wont believe a word of itbut Ill go to town this very moment and see M Du Bois myselfI wont wait for nothing
Mrs Mirvan begged her not to be alarmed but she flew out of the room and up stairs into her own apartment Lady Howard blamed both the gentlemen for having been so abrupt and followed her I would have accompanied her but the Captain stopped me and having first laughed very heartily said he was going to read his commission to his ships company
Now do you see said he as to Lady Howard I shant pretend for to enlist her into my service and so I shall een leave her to make it out as well as she can but as to all you I expect obedience and submission to orders I am now upon a hazardous expedition having undertaken to convoy a crazy vessel to the shore of Mortification so dye see if any of you have anything to propose that will forward the enterprisewhy speak and welcome but if any of you that are of my chosen crew capitulate or enter into any treaty with the enemyI shall look upon you as mutinying and turn you adrift
Having finished this harangue which was interlarded with many expressions and seaphrases that I cannot recollect he gave Sir Clement a wink of intelligence and left us to ourselves
Indeed notwithstanding the attempts I so frequently make of writing some of the Captains conversation I can only give you a faint idea of his language for almost every other word he utters is accompanied by an oath which I am sure would be as unpleasant for you to read as for me to write and besides he makes use of a thousand seaterms which are to me quite unintelligible
Poor Madame Duval sent to inquire at all probable places whether she could be conveyed to town in any stagecoach but the Captains servant brought her for answer that no London stage would pass near Howard Grove till today She then sent to order a chaise but was soon assured that no horses could be procured She was so much inflamed by these disappointments that she threatened to set out for town on foot and it was with difficulty that Lady Howard dissuaded her from this mad scheme
The whole morning was filled up with these inquiries But when we were all assembled to dinner she endeavoured to appear perfectly unconcerned and repeatedly protested that she gave not any credit to the report as far as it regarded M Du Bois being very certain that he was not the person in question
The Captain used the most provoking efforts to convince her that she deceived herself while Sir Clement with more art though not less malice affected to be of her opinion but at the same time that he pretended to relieve her uneasiness by saying that he doubted not having mistaken the name he took care to enlarge upon the danger to which the unknown gentleman was exposed and expressed great concern at his perilous situation
Dinner was hardly removed when a letter was delivered to Madam Duval The moment she had read it she hastily demanded from whom it came
A country boy brought it answered the servant but he would not wait
Run after him this instant cried she and be sure you bring him back Mon Dieu quelle aventure que feraije
Whats the matter whats the matter said the Captain
Why nothingnothings the matter O mon Dieu
And she rose and walked about the room
Why whathas Monseer sent to you continued the Captain is that there letter from him
Noit intbesides if it is its nothing to you
O then Im sure it is Pray now Madam dont be so close come tell us all about itwhat does he say how did he relish the horsepondwhich did he find best sousing single or double Fore George twas plaguy unlucky you was not with him
Its no such a thing Sir cried she very angrily and if youre so very fond of a horsepond I wish youd put yourself into one and not be always a thinking about other peoples being served so
The man then came in to acquaint her they could not overtake the boy She scolded violently and was in such perturbation that Lady Howard interfered and begged to know the cause of her uneasiness and whether she could assist her
Madame Duval cast her eyes upon the Captain and Sir Clement and said she should be glad to speak to her Ladyship without so many witnesses
Well then Miss Anville said the Captain turning to me do you and Molly go into another room and stay there till Mrs Duval has opened her mind to us
So you may think Sir cried she but whos fool then no no you neednt trouble yourself to make a ninny of me neither for Im not so easily taken in Ill assure you
Lady Howard then invited her into the dressingroom and I was desired to attend her
As soon as we had shut the door O my Lady exclaimed Madam Duval heres the most cruelest thing in the world has happenedbut that Captain is such a beast I cant say nothing before himbut its all true poor M Du Bois is tooked up
Lady Howard begged her to be comforted saying that as M Du Bois was certainly innocent there could be no doubt of his ability to clear himself
To be sure my Lady answered she I know he is innocent and to be sure theyll never be so wicked as to hang him for nothing
Certainly not replied Lady Howard you have no reason to be uneasy This is not a country where punishment is inflicted without proof
Very true my Lady but the worst thing is this I cannot bear that that fellow the Captain should know about it for if he does I shant never hear the last of itno more wont poor M Du Bois
Well well said Lady Howard shew me the letter and I will endeavour to advise you
The letter was then produced It was signed by the clerk of a country justice who acquainted her that a prisoner then upon trial for suspicion of treasonable practices against the government was just upon the point of being committed to jail but having declared that he was known to her this clerk had been prevailed upon to write in order to enquire if she really could speak to the character and family of a Frenchman who called himself Pierre Du Bois
When I heard the letter I was quite amazed at its success So improbable did it seem that a foreigner should be taken before a country justice of peace for a crime of so dangerous a nature that I cannot imagine how Madame Duval could be alarmed even for a moment But with all her violence of temper I see that she is easily frightened and in fact more cowardly than many who have not half her spirit and so little does she reflect upon circumstances or probability that she is continually the dupe of her ownI ought not to say ignorance but yet I can think of no other word
I believe that Lady Howard from the beginning of the transaction suspected some contrivance of the Captain and this letter I am sure must confirm her suspicion however though she is not at all pleased with his frolic yet she would not hazard the consequence of discovering his designs her looks her manner and her character made me draw this conclusion from her apparent perplexity for not a word did she say that implied any doubt of the authenticity of the letter Indeed there seems to be a sort of tacit agreement between her and the Captain that she should not appear to be acquainted with his schemes by which means she at once avoids quarrels and supports her dignity
While she was considering what to propose Madame Duval begged to have the use of her Ladyships chariot that she might go immediately to the assistance of her friend Lady Howard politely assured her that it should be extremely at her service and then Madame Duval besought her not to own to the Captain what had happened protesting that she could not endure he should know poor M Du Bois had met with so unfortunate an accident Lady Howard could not help smiling though she readily promised not to inform the Captain of the affair As to me she desired my attendance which I was by no means rejoiced at as I was certain that she was going upon a fruitless errand
I was then commissioned to order the chariot
At the foot of the stairs I met the Captain who was most impatiently waiting the result of the conference In an instant we were joined by Sir Clement A thousand inquiries were then made concerning Madame Duvals opinion of the letter and her intentions upon it and when I would have left them Sir Clement pretending equal eagerness with the Captain caught my hand and repeatedly detained me to ask some frivolous question to the answer of which he must be totally indifferent At length however I broke from them they retired into the parlour and I executed my commission
The carriage was soon ready and Madame Duval having begged Lady Howard to say she was not well stole softly down stairs desiring me to follow her The chariot was ordered at the gardendoor and when we were seated she told the man according to the clerks directions to drive to Mr Justice Tyrells asking at the same time how many miles off he lived
I expected he would have answered that he knew of no such person but to my great surprise he said Why Squire Tyrell lives about nine miles beyond the park
Drive fast then cried she and you shant be no worse for it
During our ride which was extremely tedious she tormented herself with a thousand fears for M Du Boiss safety and piqued herself very much upon having escaped unseen by the Captain not only that she avoided his triumph but because she knew him to be so much M Du Boiss enemy that she was sure he would prejudice the justice against him and endeavour to take away his life For my part I was quite ashamed of being engaged in so ridiculous an affair and could only think of the absurd appearance we should make upon our arrival at Mr Tyrells
When we had been out near two hours and expected every moment to stop at the place of our destination I observed that Lady Howards servant who attended us on horseback rode on forward till he was out of sight and soon after returning came up to the chariot window and delivering a note to Madame Duval said he had met a boy who was just coming with it to Howard Grove from the clerk of Mr Tyrell
While she was reading it he rode round to the other window and making a sign for secrecy put into my hand a slip of paper on which was written Whatever happens be not alarmedfor you are safethough you endanger all mankind
I readily imagined that Sir Clement must be the author of this note which prepared me to expect some disagreeable adventure but I had no time to ponder upon it for Madame Duval had no sooner read her own letter than in an angry tone of voice she exclaimed Why now what a thing is this here were come all this way for nothing
She gave me the note which informed her that she need not trouble herself to go to Mr Tyrells as the prisoner had had the address to escape I congratulated her upon this fortunate incident but she was so much concerned at having rode so far in vain that she seemed to be less pleased than provoked However she ordered the man to make what haste he could home as she hoped at least to return before the Captain should suspect what had passed
The carriage turned about and we journeyed so quietly for near an
hour that
I began to flatter myself we should be suffered to proceed to Howard
Grove without any molestation when suddenly the footman called out
John are we going right
Why I ant sure said the coachman But Im afraid we turned
wrong
What do you mean by that sirrah said Madame Duval why if you
lose your
way we shall all be in the dark
I think we should turn to the left said the footman
To the left answered the other No no Im partly sure we should
turn to
the right
You had better make some enquiry said I
Ma foi cried Madame Duval were in a fine hole herethey
neither of
them know no more than the post However Ill tell my Lady as sure
as youre born youd better find the way
Lets try this lane said the footman
No said the coachman thats the road to Canterbury we had best go straight on
Why thats the direct London road returned the footman and
will lead us
twenty miles about
Pardi cried Madame Duval why they wont go one way nor tother and now were come all this jaunt for nothing I suppose we shant get home tonight
Lets go back to the publichouse said the footman and ask for a
guide
No no said the other if we stay here a few minutes somebody
or other
will pass by and the horses are almost knocked up already
Well I protest cried Madame Duval Id give a guinea to see
them sots
both horsewhipped As sure as Im alive theyre drunk Ten to one
but theyll overturn us next
After much debating they at length agreed to go on till we came to
some inn
or met with a passenger who could direct us We soon arrived at a
farmhouse and the footman alighted and went into it
In a few minutes he returned and told us we might proceed for that he had procured a direction But added he it seems there are some thieves hereabouts and so the best way will be for you to leave your watches and your purses with the farmer whom I know very well and who is an honest man and a tenant of my Ladys
Thieves cried Madame Duval looking aghast the Lord help
usIve no
doubt but we shall be all murdered
The farmer came up to us and we gave him all we were worth and the servants followed our example We then proceeded and Madame Duvals anger so entirely subsided that in the mildest manner imaginable she intreated them to make haste and promised to tell their Lady how diligent and obliging they had been She perpetually stopped them to ask if they apprehended any danger and was at length so much overpowered by her fears that she made the footman fasten his horse to the back of the carriage and then come and seat himself within it My endeavours to encourage her were fruitless she sat in the middle held the man by the arm and protested that if he did but save her life she would make his fortune Her uneasiness gave me much concern and it was with the utmost difficulty I forbore to acquaint her that she was imposed upon but the mutual fear of the Captains resentment to me and of her own to him neither of which would have any moderation deterred me As to the footman he was evidently in torture from restraining his laughter and I observed that he was frequently obliged to make most horrid grimaces from pretended fear in order to conceal his risibility
Very soon after The robbers are coming cried the coachman
The footman opened the door and jumped out of the chariot
Madame Duval gave a loud scream
I could no longer preserve my silence For Heavens sake my dear Madame said I dont be alarmedyou are in no dangeryou are quite safethere is nothing but
Here the chariot was stopped by two men in masks who at each side put in their hands as if for our purses Madame Duval sunk to the bottom of the chariot and implored their mercy I shrieked involuntarily although prepared for the attack one of them held me fast while the other tore poor Madame Duval out of the carriage in spite of her cries threats and resistance
I was really frightened and trembled exceedingly My angel cried the man who held me you cannot surely be alarmeddo you not know meI shall hold myself in eternal abhorrence if I have really terrified you
Indeed Sir Clement you have cried Ibut for Heavens sake where is Madame Duvalwhy is she forced away
She is perfectly safe the Captain has her in charge but suffer
me now my
adored Miss Anville to take the only opportunity that is allowed me
to speak upon another a much dearer much sweeter subject
And then he hastily came into the chariot and seated himself next to me I would fain have disengaged myself from him but he would not let me Deny me not most charming of women cried he deny me not this only moment that is lent me to pour forth my soul into your gentle earsto tell you how much I suffer from your absencehow much I dread your displeasureand how cruelly I am affected by your coldness
O Sir this is no time for such languagepray leave me pray go
to the
relief of Madame DuvalI cannot bear that she should be treated with
such indignity
And will youcan you command my absenceWhen may I speak to you if not nowDoes the Captain suffer me to breathe a moment out of his sightand are not a thousand impertinent people for ever at your elbow
Indeed Sir Clement you must change your style or I will not hear
you The
impertinent people you mean are among my best friends and you would
not if you really wished me well speak of them so disrespectfully
Wish you wellO Miss Anville point but out to me how in what manner I may convince you of the fervour of my passiontell me but what services you will accept from meand you shall find my life my fortune my whole soul at your devotion
I want nothing Sir that you can offerI beg you not to talk to me soso strangely Pray leave me and pray assure yourself you cannot take any method so successless to show any regard for me as entering into schemes so frightful to Madame Duval and so disagreeable to myself
The scheme was the Captains I even opposed it though I own I could not refuse myself the solongwishedfor happiness of speaking to you once more without so many ofyour friends to watch me And I had flattered myself that the note I charged the footman to give you would have prevented the alarm you have received
Well Sir you have now I hope said enough and if you will not go yourself to see for Madame Duval at least suffer me to inquire what is become of her
And when may I speak to you again
No matter whenI dont knowperhaps
Perhaps what my angel
Perhaps never Sirif you torment me thus
Never O Miss Anville how cruel how piercing to my soul is
that icy
wordIndeed I cannot endure such displeasure
Then Sir you must not provoke it Pray leave me directly
I will Madam but let me at least make a merit of my
obedienceallow me
to hope that you will in future be less averse to trusting yourself
for a few moments alone with me
I was surprised at the freedom of this request but while I hesitated how to answer it the other mask came up to the chariotdoor and in a voice almost stifled with laughter said Ive done for herthe old buck is safebut we must sheer off directly or we shall be all ground
Sir Clement instantly left me mounted his horse and rode off The
Captain
having given some directions to the servants followed him
I was both uneasy and impatient to know the fate of Madame Duval and immediately got out of the chariot to seek her I desired the footman to show me which way she was gone he pointed with his finger by way of answer and I saw that he dared not trust his voice to make any other I walked on at a very quick pace and soon to my great consternation perceived the poor lady seated upright in a ditch I flew to her with unfeigned concern at her situation She was sobbing nay almost roaring and in the utmost agony of rage and terror As soon as she saw me she redoubled her cries but her voice was so broken I could not understand a word she said I was so much shocked that it was with difficulty I forebore exclaiming against the cruelty of the Captain for thus wantonly illtreating her and I could not forgive myself for having passively suffered the deception I used my utmost endeavours to comfort her assuring her of our present safety and begging her to rise and return to the chariot
Almost bursting with passion she pointed to her feet and with
frightful
violence she actually tore the ground with her hands
I then saw that her feet were tied together with a strong rope which was fastened to the upper branch of a tree even with a hedge which ran along the ditch where she sat I endeavoured to untie the knot but soon found it was infinitely beyond my strength I was therefore obliged to apply to the footman but being very unwilling to add to his mirth by the sight of Madame Duvals situation I desired him to lend me a knife I returned with it and cut the rope Her feet were soon disentangled and then though with great difficulty I assisted her to rise But what was my astonishment when the moment she was up she hit me a violent slap on the face I retreated from her with precipitation and dread and she then loaded me with reproaches which though almost unintelligible convinced me that she imagined I had voluntarily deserted her but she seemed not to have the slightest suspicion that she had not been attacked by real robbers
I was so much surprised and confounded at the blow that for some time I suffered her to rave without making any answer but her extreme agitation and real suffering soon dispelled my anger which all turned into compassion I then told her that I had been forcibly detained from following her and assured her of my real sorrow of her illusage
She began to be somewhat appeased and I again intreated her to return to the carriage or give me leave to order that it should draw up to the place where we stood She made no answer till I told her that the longer we remained still the greater would be the danger of our ride home Struck with this hint she suddenly and with hasty steps moved forward
Her dress was in such disorder that I was quite sorry to have
her figure
exposed to the servants who all of them in imitation of her master
hold her in derision however the disgrace was unavoidable
The ditch happily was almost quite dry or she must have suffered still more seriously yet so forlorn so miserable a figure I never before saw her Her headdress had fallen off her linen was torn her negligee had not a pin left in it her petticoats she was obliged to hold on and her shoes were perpetually slipping off She was covered with dirt weeds and filth and her face was really horrible for the pomatum and powder from her head and the dust from the road were quite pasted on her skin by her tears which with her rouge made so frightful a mixture that she hardly looked human
The servants were ready to die with laughter the moment they saw her but not all my remonstrances could prevail upon her to get into the carriage till she had most vehemently reproached them both for not rescuing her The footman fixing his eyes on the ground as if fearful of again trusting himself to look at her protested that the robbers had vowed they would shoot him if he moved an inch and that one of them had stayed to watch the chariot while the other carried her off adding that the reason of their behaving so barbarously was to revenge our having secured our purses Notwithstanding her anger she gave immediate credit to what he said and really imagined that her want of money had irritated the pretended robbers to treat her with such cruelty I determined therefore to be carefully upon my guard not to betray the imposition which could now answer no other purpose then occasioning an irreparable breach between her and the Captain
Just as we were seated in the chariot she discovered the loss which
her head
had sustained and called out My God what is become of my hairwhy
the villain has stole all my curls
She then ordered the man to run and see if he could find any of them in the ditch He went and presently returning produced a great quantity of hair in such nasty condition that I was amazed she would take it and the man as he delivered it to her found it impossible to keep his countenance which she no sooner observed than all her stormy passions were again raised She flung the battered curls in his face saying Sirrah what do you grin for I wish youd been served so yourself and you wouldnt have found it no such joke you are the impudentest fellow ever I see and if I find you dare grin at me any more I shall make no ceremony of boxing your ears
Satisfied with the threat the man hastily retired and we drove on
Her anger now subsiding into grief she began most sorrowfully to lament her case I believe she cried never nobody was so unlucky as I am and so here because I hant had misfortunes enough already that puppy has made me lose my curlsWhy I cant see nobody without themonly look at meI was never so bad off in my life before Pardi if Id knowd as much Id have brought two or three sets with me but Id never a thought of such a thing as this
Finding her now somewhat pacified I ventured to ask an account of her adventure which I will endeavour to write in her own words
Why child all this misfortune comes of that puppys making us leave our money behind us for as soon as the robber see I did put nothing in his hands he lugged me out of the chariot by main force and I verily thought hed have murdered me He was as strong as a lion I was no more in his hands than a child But I believe never nobody was so abused before for he dragged me down the road pulling and hauling me all the way as ifd no more feeling than a horse Im sure I wish I could see that man cut up and quartered alive however hell come to the gallows thats one good thing So soon as wed got out of sight of the chariot though he neednt have been afraid for if hed beat me to a mummy those cowardly fellows wouldnt have said nothing to itso when I was got there what does he do but all of a sudden he takes me by both the shoulders and he gives me such a shakeMon Dieu I shall never forget it if I live to be an hundred Im sure I dare say Im out of joint all over And though I made as much noise as I ever could he took no more notice of it than nothing at all there he stood shaking me in that manner as if he was doing it for a wager Im determined if it costs me all my fortune Ill see that villain hanged He shall be found out if theres eer a justice in England So when he had shook me till he was tired and I felt all over like a jelly without saying never a word he takes and pops me into the ditch Im sure I thought hed have murdered me as much as ever I thought any thing in my life for he kept bumping me about as if he thought nothing too bad for me However Im resolved Ill never leave my purse behind me again the longest day I have to live So when he couldnt stand over me no longer he holds out his hands again for my money but he was as cunning as could be for he wouldnt speak a word because I shouldnt swear to his voice however that shant save him for Ill swear to him any day in the year if I can but catch him So when I told him I had no money he fell to jerking me again just as if he had but that moment begun And after that he got me close by a tree and out of his pocket he pulls a great cordIts a wonder I did not swoon away for as sure as youre alive he was going to hang to me that tree I screamed like any thing mad and told him if he would but spare my life Id never prosecute him nor tell anybody what hed done to me so he stood some time quite in a brown study athinking what he should do And so after that he forced me to sit down in the ditch and he tied my feet together just as you see them and then as if he had not done enough he twitched off my cap and without saying nothing got on his horse and left me in that condition thinking I suppose that I might lie there and perish
Though this narrative almost compelled me to laugh yet I was really irritated with the Captain for carrying his love of tormentingsport he calls itto such barbarous and unjustifiable extremes I consoled and soothed her as well as I was able and told her that since M Du Bois had escaped I hoped when she recovered from her fright all would end well
Fright child repeated shewhy thats not halfI promise you I wish it was but here Im bruised from top to toe and its well if ever I have the right use of my limbs again However Im glad the villain got nothing but his trouble for his pains But here the worst is to come for I cant go out because Ive got no curls and so hell be escaped before I can get to the justice to stop him Im resolved Ill tell Lady Howard how her man served me for if he hadnt made me fling em away I dare say I would have pinned them up well enough for the country
Perhaps Lady Howard may be able to lend you a cap that will wear
without
them
Lady Howard indeed why do you think Id wear one of her dowdies No Ill promise you I shant put on no such disguisement Its the unluckiest thing in the world that I did not make the man pick up the curls again but he put me in such a passion I could not think of nothing I know I cant get none at Howard Grove for love nor money for of all the stupid places ever I see that Howard Grove is the worst theres never no getting nothing one wants
This sort of conversation lasted till we arrived at our journeys end and then a new distress occurred Madame Duval was eager to speak to Lady Lady Howard and Mrs Mirvan and to relate her misfortunes but she could not endure that Sir Clement or the Captain should see her in such disorder so she said they were so illnatured that instead of pitying her they would only make a jest of her disasters She therefore sent me first into the house to wait for an opportunity of their being out of the way that she might steal up stairs unobserved In this I succeeded as the gentlemen thought it most prudent not to seem watching for her though they both contrived to divert themselves with peeping at her as she passed
She went immediately to bed where she had her supper Lady Howard and Mrs Mirvan both of them very kindly sat with her and listened to her tale with compassionate attention while Miss Mirvan and I retired to our own room where I was very glad to end the troubles of the day in a comfortable conversation
The Captains raptures during supper at the success of his plan were boundless I spoke afterwards to Mrs Mirvan with the openness which her kindness encourages and begged her to remonstrate with him upon the cruelty of tormenting Madame Duval so causelessly She promised to take the first opportunity of starting up the subject but said he was at present so much elated that he would not listen to her with any patience However should he make any new efforts to molest her I can by no means consent to be passive Had I imagined he would have been so violent I would have risked his anger in her defense much sooner
She had kept her bed all day and declares she is almost bruised to death
Adieu my dear Sir What a long letter have I written I could almost fancy I sent it to you from London
LETTER XXXIV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION
Howard Grove May 15
THIS insatiable Captain if left to himself would not I believe rest till he had tormented Madame Duval into a fever He seems to have no delight but in terrifying or provoking her and all his thoughts apparently turn upon inventing such methods as may do it most effectually
She had her breakfast again in bed yesterday morning but during ours the Captain with a very significant look at Sir Clement gave us to understand that he thought she had now rested long enough to bear the hardships of a fresh campaign
His meaning was obvious and therefore I resolved to endeavour immediately to put a stop to his intended exploits When breakfast was over I followed Mrs Mirvan out of the parlour and begged her to lose no time in pleading the cause of Madame Duval with the Captain My love answered she I have already expostulated with him but all I can say is fruitless while his favourite Sir Clement contrives to urge him on
Then I will go and speak to Sir Clement said I for I know he will desist if I request him
Have I care my dear said she smiling it is sometimes dangerous to make requests to men who are too desirous of receiving them
Well then my dear Madam will you give me leave to speak myself to the Captain
Willingly nay I will accompany you to him
I thanked her and we went to seek him He was walking in the garden with Sir Clement Mrs Mirvan most obligingly made an opening for my purpose by saying Mr Mirvan I have brought a petitioner with me
Why whats the matter now cried he
I was fearful of making him angry and stammered very much when I told him I hoped he had no new plan for alarming Madame Duval
New plan cried he why you dont suppose the old one would do again do you Not but what it was a very good one only I doubt she wouldnt bite
Indeed Sir said I she had already suffered too much and I hope you will pardon me if I take the liberty of telling you that I think it my my duty to do all in my power to prevent her being again so much terrified
A sullen gloominess instantly clouded his face and turning short from me he said I might do as I pleased but that I should much sooner repent than repair my officiousness
I was too much disconcerted at this rebuff to attempt making any answer and finding that Sir Clement warmly espoused my cause I walked away and left them to discuss the point together
Mrs Mirvan who never speaks to the Captain when he is out of humour was glad to follow me and with her usual sweetness made a thousand apologies for her husbands illmanners
When I left her I went to Madame Duval who was just risen and employed in examining the clothes she had on the day of her ill usage
Heres a sight she cried Come here childonly lookPardi so long as Ive lived I never see so much before Why all my things are spoilt and whats worse my sacque was as good as new Heres the second negligee Ive used in this manner Im sure I was a fool to put it on in such a lonesome place as this however if I stay here these ten years Ill never put on another good gown that Im resolved
Will you let the maid try if she can iron it out or clean it Maam
No shell only make bad worseBut look here now heres a cloak Mon Dieu why it looks like a dishclout Of all the unluckiness that ever I met this is the worst for do you know I bought it but the day before I left ParisBesides into the bargain my caps quite gone where the villain twitched it I dont know but I never see no more of it from that time to this Now you must know that this was the becomingest cap I had in the world for Ive never another with pink ribbon in it and to tell you the truth if I hadnt thought to have seen M Du Bois Id no more have put it on than Id have flown for as to what one wears in such a stupid place as this it signifies no more than nothing at all
She then told me that she had been thinking all night of a contrivance to hinder the Captain from finding out her loss of curls which was having a large gauge handkerchief pinned over her head as a hood and saying she had the toothache
To tell you the truth added she I believe that Captain is one of the worst men in the world hes always making a joke of me and as to his being a gentleman he has no more manners than a bear for hes always upon the grin when ones in distress and I declare Id rather be done anything to than laughed at for to my mind its one or other the disagreeablest thing in the world
Mrs Mirvan I found had been endeavouring to dissuade her from the design she had formed of having recourse to the law in order to find out the supposed robbers for she dreads a discovery of the Captain during Madam Duvals stay at Howard Grove as it could not fail being productive of infinite commotion She has therefore taken great pains to show the inutility of applying to justice unless she were more able to describe the offenders against whom she would appear and has assured her that as she neither heard their voices nor saw their faces she cannot possibly swear to their persons or obtain any redress
Madame Duval in telling me this extremely lamented her hard fate that she was thus prevented from revenging her injuries which however she vowed she would not be persuaded to pocket tamely because added she if such villains as these are let to have their own way and nobody takes no notice of their impudence theyll make no more ado than nothing at all of tying people in ditches and such things as that however I shall consult with M Du Bois as soon as I can ferret out where hes hid himself Im sure Ive a right to his advice for its all along of his gaping about at the Tower that Ive met with these misfortunes
M Du Bois said I will I am sure be very sorry when he hears what has happened
And what good will that do nowthat wont unspoil all my clothes I can tell him I ant much obliged to him though its no fault of hisyet it int the less provokinger for that Im sure if he had been there to have seen me served in that manner and put neck and heels into a ditch hed no more have thought it was me than the Pope of Rome Ill promise you whatever you may think of it I shant have no rest night nor day till I find out that rogue
I have no doubt Madam but you will soon discover him
Pardi if I do Ill hang him as sure as fatebut whats the oddest is that he should take such a special spite against me above all the rest it was as much for nothing as could be for I dont know what I had done so particular bad to be used in that manner Im sure I hadnt given no offence as I know of for I never see his face all the time and as to screaming a little I think its very hard if one mustnt do such a thing as that when ones put in fear of ones life
During this conversation she endeavoured to adjust her headdress but could not at all please herself Indeed had I not been present I should have thought it impossible for a woman at her time of life to be so very difficult in regard to dress What she may have in view I cannot imagine but the labour of the toilette seems the chief business of her life
When I left her in my way down stairs I met Sir Clement who with great earnestness said he must not be denied the honour of a moments conversation with me and then without waiting for an answer he led me to the garden at the door of which however I absolutely insisted upon stopping
He seemed very serious and said in a grave tone of voice At length Miss Anville I flatter myself I have hit upon an expedient that will oblige you and therefore though it is death to myself I will put in practice
I begged him to explain himself
I saw your desire of saving Madame Duval and scarce could I refrain giving the brutal Captain my real opinion of his savage conduct but I am unwilling to quarrel with him lest I should be denied entrance into a house which you inhabit I have been endeavouring to prevail with him to give up his absurd new scheme but I find him impenetrableI have therefore determined to make a pretense for suddenly leaving this place dear as it is to me and containing all I most admire and adoreand I will stay in town till the violence of this boobyish humour is abated
He stopped but I was silent for I knew not what I ought to say He took my hand which he pressed to his lips saying And must I then Miss Anville must I quit yousacrifice voluntarily my greatest felicityand yet not be honoured with one word one look of approbation
I withdrew my hand and said with half a laugh You know so well Sir Clement the value of the favours you confer that it would be superfluous for me to point it out
Charming charming girl how does your wit your understanding rise upon me daily and must I can I part with youwill no other method
O Sir do you so soon repent the good office you had planned for
Madame Duval
For Madame Duvalcruel creature and will you not even suffer me to place to your account the sacrifice I am about to make
You must place it Sir to what account you please but I am too much in haste now to stay here any longer
And then I would have left him but he held me and rather impatiently said If then I cannot be so happy as to oblige you Miss Anville you must not be surprised should I seek to oblige myself If my scheme is not honoured with your approbation for which alone it was formed why should I to my own infinite dissatisfaction pursue it
We were then for a few minutes both silent I was really unwilling he should give up a plan which would so effectually break into the Captains designs and at the same time save me the pain of disobliging him and I should instantly and thankfully have accepted his offered civility had not Mrs Mirvans caution made me fearful However when he pressed me to speak I said in an ironical voice I had thought Sir that the very strong sense you have yourself of the favour you propose to me would sufficiently have repaid you but as I was mistaken I must thank you myself And now making a low courtesy I hope Sir you are satisfied
Loveliest of thy sex he began but I forced myself from him and ran upstairs
Soon after Miss Mirvan told me that Sir Clement had just received a letter which obliged him instantly to leave the Grove and that he had actually ordered a chaise I then acquainted her with the real state of the affair Indeed I conceal nothing from her she is so gentle and sweettempered that it gives me great pleasure to place an entire confidence in her
At dinner I must own we all missed him for though the flightiness of his behaviour to me when we are by ourselves is very distressing yet in large companies and general conversation he is extremely entertaining and agreeable As to the Captain he has been so much chagrined at his departure that he has scarce spoken a word since he went but Madame Duval who made her first public appearance since her accident was quite in raptures that she escaped seeing him
The money which we left at the farmhouse has been returned to us What pains the Captain must have taken to arrange and manage the adventures which he chose we should meet with Yet he must certainly be discovered for Madame Duval is already very much perplexed at having received a letter this morning from M Du Bois in which he makes no mention of his imprisonment However she has so little suspicion that she imputes his silence upon the subject to his fears that the letter might be intercepted
Not one opportunity could I meet with while Sir Clement was here to enquire after his friend Lord Orville but I think it was strange he should never mention him unasked Indeed I rather wonder that Mrs Mirvan herself did not introduce the subject for she always seemed particularly attentive to him
And now once more all my thoughts involuntarily turn upon the letter I so soon expect from Paris This visit of Sir Clement has however somewhat diverted my fears and therefore I am very glad he made it at this time Adieu my dear Sir
LETTER XXXV
SIR JOHN BELMONT TO LADY HOWARD Paris May 11
Madam
I HAVE this moment the honour of your Ladyships Letter and I will not wait another before I return an answer
It seldom happens that a man though extolled as a saint is really without blemish or that another though reviled as a devil is really without humanity Perhaps the time is not very distant when I may have the honour to convince your Ladyship of this truth in regard to Mr Villars and myself
As to the young lady whom Mr Villars so obligingly proposes presenting to me I wish her all the happiness to which by your ladyships account she seems entitled and if she has a third part of the merit of her to whom you compare her I doubt not but Mr Villars will be more successful in every other application he may make for her advantage that he can ever be in any with which he may be pleased to favour me I have the honour to be Madam Your Ladyships most humble and most obedient servant JOHN BELMONT
LETTER XXXVI
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Howard Grove May 18
WELL my dear Sir all is now over the letter so anxiously expected is at length arrived and my doom is fixed The various feelings which oppress me I have not language to describe nor need Iyou know my heart you have yourself formed itand its sensations upon this occasion you may but too readily imagine
Outcast as I am and rejected for ever by him to whom I of right belongshall I now implore your continued protectionNo noI will not offend your generous heart which open to distress has no wish but to relieve it with an application that would seem to imply a doubt I am more secure than ever of your kindness since you now know upon that is my sole dependence
I endeavour to bear this stroke with composure and in such a manner as if I had already received your counsel and consolation Yet at times my emotions are almost too much for me O Sir what a letter for a parent to write Must I not myself be deaf to the voice of nature if I could endure to be thus absolutely abandoned without regret I dare not even to you nor would I could I help it to myself acknowledge all that I might think for indeed I have sometimes sentiments upon this rejection which my strongest sense of duty can scarcely correct Yet suffer me to askmight not this answer have been softenedwas it not enough to disclaim me for ever without treating me with contempt and wounding me with derision
But while I am thus thinking of myself I forget how much more he is the object of sorrow than I am Alas what amends can he make himself for the anguish he is hoarding up for time to come My heart bleeds for him whenever this reflection occurs to me
What is said of you my protector my friend my benefactor I dare
not trust
myself to comment upon Gracious Heaven what a return for goodness
so unparalleled
I would fain endeavour to divert my thoughts from this subject but even that is not in my power for afflicting as this letter is to me I find that it will not be allowed to conclude the affair though it does all my expectations for Madame Duval has determined not to let it rest here She heard the letter in great wrath and protested she would not be so easily answered she regretted her facility in having been prevailed upon to yield the direction of this affair to those who knew not how to manage it and vowed she would herself undertake and conduct it in future
It is in vain that I have pleaded against her resolution and besought her to forbear an attack where she has nothing to expect but resentment especially as there seems to be a hint that Lady Howard will one day be more openly dealt with She will not hear me she is furiously bent upon a project which is terrible to think offor she means to go herself to Paris take me with her and there face to face demand justice
How to appease or to persuade her I know not but for the universe would I not be dragged in such a manner to an interview so awful with a parent I have never yet beheld
Lady Howard and Mrs Mirvan are both of them infinitely shocked at the present state of affairs and they seem to be even more kind to me than ever and my dear Maria who is the friend of my heart uses her utmost efforts to console me and when she fails in her design with still greater kindness she sympathises in my sorrow
I very much rejoice however that Sir Clement Willoughby had left us before this letter arrived I am sure the general confusion of the house would otherwise have betrayed to him the whole of a tale which I now more than ever wish to have buried in oblivion
Lady Howard thinks I ought not to disoblige Madame Duval yet she acknowledges the impropriety of my accompanying her abroad on such an enterprise Indeed I would rather die than force myself into his presence But so vehement is Madame Duval that she would instantly have compelled me to attend her to town in her way to Paris had not Lady Howard so far exerted herself as to declare she could by no means consent to my quitting her house till she gave me up to you by whose permission I had entered it
She was extremely angry at this denial and the Captain by his sneers and raillery so much increased her rage that she has positively declared should your next letter dispute her authority to guide me by her own pleasure she will without hesitation make a journey to Berry Hill and teach you to know who she is
Should she put this threat in execution nothing could give me greater uneasiness for her violence and volubility would almost distract you
Unable as I am to act for myself or to judge what conduct I ought to pursue how grateful do I feel myself that I have such a guide and director to counsel and instruct me as yourself
Adieu my dearest Sir Heaven I trust will never let me live to be repulsed and derided by you to whom I may now sign myself wholly your EVELINA
LETTER XXXVII
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill May 21
LET not my Evelina be depressed by a stroke of fortune for which she is not responsible No breach of duty on your part has incurred the unkindness which has been shown you nor have you by any act of imprudence provoked either censure or reproach Let me intreat you therefore my dearest child to support yourself with that courage which your innocency ought to inspire and let all the affliction you allow yourself be for him only who not having that support must one day be but too severely sensible how much he wants it
The hint thrown out concerning myself is wholly unintelligible to me my heart I dare own fully acquits me of vice but without blemish I have never ventured to pronounce myself However it seems his intention to be hereafter more explicit and thenshould anything appear that has on my part contributed to those misfortunes we lament let me at least say that the most partial of my friends cannot be so much astonished as I shall myself be at such a discovery
The mention also of any future applications I may make is equally beyond my comprehension But I will not dwell upon a subject which almost compels from me reflections that cannot but be wounding to a heart so formed for filial tenderness as my Evelinas There is an air of mystery throughout the letter the explanation of which I will await in silence
The scheme of Madame Duval is such as might be reasonably expected from a woman so little inured to disappointment and so totally incapable of considering the delicacy of your situation Your averseness to her plan gives me pleasure for it exactly corresponds with my own Why will she not make the journey she projects by herself She would not have even the wish of an opposition to encounter And then once more might my child and myself be left to the quiet enjoyment of that peaceful happiness which she alone has interrupted As to her coming hither I could indeed dispense with such a visit but if she will not be satisfied with my refusal by letter I must submit to the task of giving it her in person
My impatience for your return is increased by your account of Sir Clement Willoughbys visit to Howard Grove I am but little surprised at the perseverance of his assiduities to interest you in his favour but I am very much hurt that you should be exposed to addresses which by their privacy have an air that shocks me You cannot my love be too circumspect the slightest carelessness on your part will be taken advantage of by a man of his disposition It is not sufficient for you to be reserved his conduct even calls for your resentment and should he again as will doubtless be his endeavour contrive to solicit your favour in private let your disdain and displeasure be so marked as to constrain a change in his behaviour Though indeed should his visit be repeated while you remain at the Grove Lady Howard must pardon me if I shorten yours
Adieu my child You will always make my respects to the hospitable family to which we are so much obliged
LETTER XXXVIII
MR VILLARS TO LADY HOWARD Berry Hill May 27
Dear Madam
I BELIEVE your Ladyship will not be surprised at hearing I have had a visit from Madame Duval as I doubt not her having made known her intention before she left Howard Grove I would gladly have excused myself this meeting could I have avoided it decently but after so long a journey it was not possible to refuse her admittance
She told me that she came to Berry Hill in consequence of a letter I had sent to her granddaughter in which I forbid her going to Paris Very roughly she then called me to account for the authority which I had assumed and had I been disposed to have argued with her she would very angrily have disputed the right by which I used it But I declined all debating I therefore listened very quietly till she had so much fatigued herself with talking that she was glad in her turn to be silent And then I begged to know the purport of her visit
She answered that she came to make me relinquish the power I had usurped over her granddaughter and assured me she would not quit the place till she succeeded
But I will not trouble your Ladyship with the particulars of this disagreeable conversation nor should I but on account of the result have chosen so unpleasant a subject for your perusal However I will be as concise as I possibly can that the better occupations of your Ladyships time may be less impeded
When she found me inexorable in refusing Evelinas attending her to Paris she peremptorily insisted that she should at least live with her in London till Sir John Belmonts return I remonstrated against this scheme with all the energy in my power but the contest was vain she lost her patience and I my time She declared that if I was resolute in opposing her she would instantly make a will in which she would leave all her fortune to strangers though otherwise she intended her granddaughter for her sole heiress
To me I own this threat seemed of little consequence I have long accustomed myself to think that with a competency of which she is sure my child might be as happy as in the possession of millions but the incertitude of her future fate deters me from following implicitly the dictates of my present judgement The connections she may hereafter form the style of life for which she may be destined and the future family to which she may belong are considerations which give but too much weight to the menaces of Madame Duval In short Madam after a discourse infinitely tedious I was obliged though very reluctantly to compromise with this ungovernable woman by consenting that Evelina should pass one month with her
I never made a concession with so bad a grace or so much regret The violence and vulgarity of this woman her total ignorance of propriety the family to which she is related and the company she is likely to keep are objections so forcible to her having the charge of this dear child that nothing less than my diffidence of the right I have of depriving her of so large a fortune would have induced me to listen to her proposal Indeed we parted at last equally discontented she at what I had refused I at what I had granted
It now only remains for me to return your Ladyship my humble acknowledgments for the kindness which you have so liberally shown to my ward and to beg you would have the goodness to part with her when Madame Duval thinks proper to claim the promise which she has extorted from me I am Dear Madam c ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER XXXIX
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill May 28
WITH a reluctance which occasions me inexpressible uneasiness I have been almost compelled to consent that my Evelina should quit the protection of the hospitable and respectable Lady Howard and accompany Madame Duval to a city which I had hoped she would never again have entered But alas my dear child we are the slaves of custom the dupes of prejudice and dare not stem the torrent of an opposing world even though our judgements condemn our compliance However since the die is cast we must endeavor to make the best of it
You will have the occasion in the course of the month you are to pass with Madame Duval for all the circumspection and prudence you can call to your aid She will not I know propose any thing to you which she thinks wrong herself but you must learn not only to judge but to act for yourself if any schemes are started any engagements made which your understanding represents to you as improper exert yourself resolutely in avoiding them and do not by a too passive facility risk the censure of the world or your own future regret
You cannot too assiduously attend to Madame Duval herself but I would wish you to mix as little as possible with her associates who are not likely to be among those whose acquaintance would reflect credit upon you Remember my dear Evelina nothing is so delicate as the reputation of a woman it is at once the most beautiful and most brittle of all human things
Adieu my beloved child I shall be but ill at ease till this month is elapsed AV
LETTER XL
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS London June 6
ONCE more my dearest Sir I write to you from this great city Yesterday morning with the truest concern I quitted the dear inhabitants of Howard Grove and most impatiently shall I count the days till I see them again Lady Howard and Mrs Mirvan took leave of me with the most flattering kindness but indeed I knew not how to part with Maria whose own apparent sorrow redoubled mine She made me promise to send her a letter every post and I shall write to her with the same freedom and almost the same confidence you allow me to make use of to yourself
The Captain was very civil to me but he wrangled with poor Madame Duval to the last moment and taking me aside just before we got into the chaise he said Harkee Miss Anville Ive a favour for to ask of you which is this that you will write us word how the old gentlewoman finds herself when she sees it was all a trick and what the French lubber says to it and all about it
I answered that I would obey him though I was very little pleased with the commission which to me was highly improper but he will either treat me as an informer or make me a party in his frolic
As soon as we drove away Madame Duval with much satisfaction exclaimed Dieu merci weve got off at last Im sure I never desire to see that place again Its a wonder Ive got away alive for I believe Ive had the worst luck ever was known from the time I set my foot upon the threshold I know I wish Id never a gone Besides into the bargain its the most dullest place in all Christendom theres never no diversions nor nothing at all
Then she bewailed M Du Bois concerning whose adventures she continued to make various conjectures during the rest of our journey
When I asked her what part of London she should reside in she told me that Mr Branghton was to meet us at an inn and would conduct us to a lodging Accordingly we proceeded to a house in Bishopsgate Street and were led by a waiter into a room where we found Mr Branghton
He received us very civilly but seemed rather surprised at seeing me saying Why I didnt think of your bringing Miss however shes very welcome
Ill tell you how it was said Madame Duval you must know Ive a mind to take the girl to Paris that she may see something of the world and improve herself a little besides Ive another reason that you and I will talk more about But do you know that meddling old parson as I told you of would not let her go however Im resolved Ill be even with him for I shall take her on with me without saying never a word more to nobody
I started at this intimation which very much surprised me But I am very glad she has discovered her intention as I shall be carefully upon my guard not to venture from town with her
Mr Branghton then hoped we had passed our time agreeably in the country
O Lord cousin cried she Ive been the miserablest creature in the world Im sure all the horses in London shant drag me into the country again of one while why how do you think Ive been servedonly guess
Indeed cousin I cant pretend to do that
Why then Ill tell you Do you know Ive been robbedthat is the villain would have robbed me if he could only Id secured all my money
Why then cousin I think your loss cant have been very great
O Lord you dont know what youre a saying youre talking in the unthinkingest manner in the world why it was all along of not having no money that I met with that misfortune
Hows that cousin I dont see what great misfortune you can have met with if youd secured all your money
Thats because you dont know nothing of the matter for there the villain came to the chaise and because we hadnt got nothing to give him though hed no more right to our money than the man in the moon yet do you know he fell into the greatest passion ever you see and abused me in such a manner and put me in a ditch and got a rope opurpose to hang meand Im sure if that wasnt misfortune enough why I dont know what is
This is a hard case indeed cousin But why dont you go to Justice
Fielding
O as to that Im a going to him directly but only I want first to see M Du Bois for the oddest thing of all is that he has wrote to me and never said nothing of where he is nor whats become of him nor nothing else
M Du Bois why hes at my house at this very time
M Du Bois at your house well I declare this is the surprisingest part of all However I assure you I think he might have comed for me as well as you considering what I have gone through on his account for to tell you the truth it was all along of him that I met with that accident so I dont take it very kind of him I promise you
Well but cousin tell me some of the particulars of this affair
As to the particulars Im sure theyd make your hair stand on end to hear them however the beginning of it all was through the fault of M Du Bois but Ill assure you he may take care of himself in future since he dont so much as come to see if Im dead or aliveBut there I went for him to a justice of peace and rode all out of the way and did every thing in the world and was used worser than a dog and all for the sake of serving of him and now you see he dont so muchwell I was a fool for my painsHowever he may get somebody else to be treated so another time for if hes taken up every day in the week Ill never go after him no more
This occasioned an explanation in the course of which Madame Duval to her utter amazement heard that M Du Bois had never left London during her absence nor did Mr Branghton believe that he had ever been to the Tower or met with any kind of accident
Almost instantly the whole truth of the transaction seemed to rush upon her mind and her wrath was inconceivably violent She asked me a thousand questions in a breath but fortunately was too vehement to attend to my embarrassment which must otherwise have betrayed my knowledge of the deceit Revenge was her first wish and she vowed she would go the next morning to Justice Fielding and inquire what punishment she might lawfully inflict upon the Captain for his assault
I believe we were an hour at Bishopsgate Street before poor Madame Duval could allow any thing to be mentioned but her own story at any length however Mr Branghton told her that M Du Bois and all his own family were waiting for her at his house A hackneycoach was then called and we proceeded to Snow Hill
Mr Branghtons house is small and inconvenient though his shop which takes in all the ground floor is large and commodious I believe I told you before that he is a silversmith
We were conducted up two pairs of stairs for the diningroom Mr Branghton told us was let His two daughters their brother M Du Bois and a young man were at tea They had waited some time for Madame Duval but I found they had not any expectation that I should accompany her and the young ladies I believe were rather more surprised than pleased when I made my appearance for they seemed hurt that I should see their apartment Indeed I would willingly have saved them that pain had it been in my power
The first person who saw me was M Du Bois Ah mon Dieu exclaimed he voila Mademoiselle
Goodness cried young Branghton if there isnt Miss
Lord so there is said Miss Polly well Im sure I should never have dreamed of Misss coming
Nor I neither Im sure cried Miss Branghton or else I would not have been in this room to see her Im quite ashamed about itonly not thinking of seeing any body but my aunthowever Tom its all your fault for you know very well I wanted to borrow Mr Smiths room only you were so grumpy you would not let me
Lord what signifies said her brother I dare be sworn Miss has been up two pair of stairs before nowhant you Miss
I begged that I might not give them the least disturbance and assured them that I had not any choice in regard to what room we sat in
Well said Miss Polly when you come next Miss well have Mr Smiths room and its a very pretty one and only up one pair of stairs and nicely furnished and every thing
To say the truth said Miss Branghton I thought that my cousin would not upon any account have come to town in the summertime for its not at all the fashion so to be sure thinks I shell stay till September when the playhouses open
This was my reception which I believe you will not call a very cordial one Madame Duval who after having severely reprimanded M Du Bois for his negligence was just entering upon the story of her misfortunes now wholly engaged the company
M Du Bois listened to her with a look of the utmost horror repeatedly lifting up his eyes and hands and exclaiming O ciel quel barbare The young ladies gave her the most earnest attention but their brother and the young man kept a broad grin upon their faces during the whole recital She was however too much engaged to observe them but when she mentioned having been tied in a ditch young Branghton no longer able to contain himself burst into a loud laugh declaring that he had never heard any thing so funny in his life His laugh was heartily reechoed by his friend the Miss Branghtons could not resist the example and poor Madame Duval to her extreme amazement was absolutely overpowered and stopped by the violence of their mirth
For some minutes the room seemed quite in an uproar the rage of Madame Duval the astonishment of M Du Bois and the angry interrogatories of Mr Branghton on one side the convulsive tittering of the sisters and the loud laughs of the young men on the other occasioned such noise passion and confusion that had any one stopped an instant on the stairs he must have concluded himself in Bedlam At length however the father brought them to order and halflaughing halffrightened they made Madame Duval some very awkward apologies But she would not be prevailed upon to continue her narrative till they had protested they were laughing at the Captain and not at her Appeased by this she resumed her story which by the help of stuffing handkerchiefs into their mouths the young people heard with tolerable decency
Every body agreed that the illusage the Captain had given her was actionable and Mr Branghton said he was sure she might recover what damages she pleased since she had been put in fear of her life
She then with great delight declared that she would lose no time in satisfying her revenge and vowed she would not be contented with less than half his fortune For though she said I dont put no value upon the money because Dieu merci I hant no want of it yet I dont wish for nothing so much as to punish that fellow for Im sure whatevers the cause of it he owes me a great grudge and I know no more what its for than you do but hes always been doing me one spite or another ever since I knew him
Soon after tea Miss Branghton took an opportunity to tell me in a whisper that the young man I saw was a lover of her sisters that his name was Brown and that he was a haberdasher with many other particulars of his circumstances and family and then she declared her utter aversion to the thoughts of such a match but added that her sister had no manner of spirit or ambition though for her part she would ten times rather die an old maid than marry any person but a gentleman And for that matter added she I believe Polly herself dont care much for him only shes in such a hurry because I suppose shes a mind to be married before me however shes very welcome for Im sure I dont care a pins point whether I ever marry at allits all one to me
Some time after this Miss Polly contrived to tell her story She assured me with much tittering that her sister was in a great fright lest she should be married first So I make her believe that I will continued she for I dearly love to plague her a little though I declare I dont intend to have Mr Brown in realityIm sure I dont like him half well enoughdo you Miss
It is not possible for me to judge of his merits said I as I am entirely a stranger to him
But what do you think of him Miss
Why really II dont know
But do you think him handsome Some people reckon him to have a good pretty personbut Im sure for my part I think hes monstrous uglydont you Miss
I am no judgebut I think his person is veryvery well
Very well Why pray Miss in a tone of vexation what fault can you find with it
O none at all
Im sure you must be very illnatured if you could Now theres Biddy says she thinks nothing of himbut I know its all out of spite You must know Miss it makes her as mad as can be that I should have a lover before her but shes so proud that nobody will court her and I often tell her shell die an old maid But the thing is she has taken it into her head to have a liking for Mr Smith as lodges on the first floor but Lord hell never have her for hes quite a fine gentleman and besides Mr Brown heard him say one day that hed never marry as long as he lived for hed no opinion of matrimony
And did you tell your sister this
O to be sure I told her directly but she did not mind me however if she will be a fool she must
This extreme want of affection and goodnature increased the distaste I already felt for these unamiable sisters and a confidence so entirely unsolicited and unnecessary manifested equally their folly and their want of decency
I was very glad when the time for our departing arrived Mr Branghton said our lodgings were in Holborn that we might be near his house and neighbourly He accompanied us to them himself
Our rooms are large and not inconvenient our landlord is an hosier I am sure I have a thousand reasons to rejoice that I am so little known for my present situation is in every respect very unenviable and I would not for the world be seen by any acquaintance of Mrs Mirvan
This morning Madame Duval attended by all the Branghtons actually went to a Justice in the neighborhood to report the Captains ill usage of her I had great difficulty in excusing myself from being of the party which would have given me very serious concern Indeed I was extremely anxious though at home till I heard the result of the application for I dread to think of the uneasiness which such an affair would occasion the amiable Mrs Mirvan But fortunately Madame Duval has received very little encouragement to proceed in her design for she has been informed that as she neither heard the voice nor saw the face of the person suspected she will find difficulty to cast him upon conjecture and will have but little probability of gaining her cause unless she can procure witnesses of the transaction Mr Branghton therefore who has considered all the circumstances of the affair is of the opinion the lawsuit will not only be expensive but tedious and hazardous and has advised against it Madame Duval though very unwillingly has acquiesced in his decision but vows that if she ever is so affronted again she will be revenged even if she ruins herself I am extremely glad that this ridiculous adventure seems now likely to end without more serious consequences
Adieu my dearest Sir My direction is at Mr Dawkins a hosier in
High Holborn
LETTER XLI
EVELINA TO MISS MIRVAN June 7th
I HAVE no words my sweet friend to express the thankfulness I feel for the unbounded kindness which you your dear mother and the muchhonoured Lady Howard have shown me and still less can I find language to tell you with what reluctance I parted from such dear and generous friends whose goodness reflects at once so much honour on their own hearts and on her to whom it has been so liberally bestowed But I will not repeat what I have already written to the kind Mrs Mirvan I will remember your admonitions and confine to my own breast that gratitude with which you have filled it and teach my pen to dwell upon subjects less painful to my generous correspondent
O Maria London now seems no longer the same place where I lately enjoyed so much happiness every thing is new and strange to me even the town itself has not the same aspectMy situation so alteredmy home so differentmy companions so changedBut you well know my averseness to this journey
Indeed to me London now seems a desert that gay and busy appearance it so lately wore is now succeeded by a look of gloom fatigue and lassitude the air seems stagnant the heat is intense the dust intolerable and the inhabitants illiterate and underbred At least such is the face of things in the part of town where I at present reside
Tell me my dear Maria do you never retrace in your memory the time we passed here when together to mine it recurs for ever And yet I think I rather recollect a dream or some visionary fancy than a realityThat I should ever have been known to Lord Orvillethat I should have spoken tohave danced with himseems now a romantic illusion and that elegant politeness that flattering attention that highbred delicacy which so much distinguished him above all other men and which struck us with so much admiration I now retrace the remembrance of rather as belonging to an object of ideal perfection formed by my own imagination than to a being of the same race and nature as those with whom I at present converse
I have no news for you my dear Miss Mirvan for all that I could venture to say of Madame Duval I have already written to your sweet mother and as to adventures I have none to record Situated as I now am I heartily hope I shall not meet with any my wish is to remain quiet and unnoticed
Adieu excuse the gravity of this letter and believe me your most sincerely Affectionate and obliged EVELINA ANVILLE
LETTER XLII
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Holborn June 9
YESTERDAY morning we received an invitation to dine and spend the day at Mr Branghtons and M Du Bois who was also invited called to conduct us to Snow Hill
Young Branghton received us at the door and the first words he spoke were Do you know sisters ant dressed yet
Then hurrying us into the house he said to me Come Miss you shall go upstairs and catch emI dare say theyre at the glass
He would have taken my hand but I declined this civility and begged to follow Madame Duval
Mr Branghton then appeared and led the way himself We went as before up two pairs of stairs but the moment the father opened the door the daughters both gave a loud scream We all stopped and then Miss Branghton called out Lord Papa what do you bring the company up here for why Polly and I ant half dressed
More shame for you answered he heres your aunt and cousin and M Du Bois all waiting and neer a room to take them to
Whod have thought of their coming so soon cried she I am sure for my part I thought Miss was used to nothing but quality hours
Why I shant be ready this halfhour yet said Miss Polly cant they stay in the shop till were dressed
Mr Branghton was very angry and scolded them violently however we were obliged to descend and stools were procured for us in the shop where we found the brother who was highly delighted he said that his sisters had been catched and he thought proper to entertain me with a long account of their tediousness and the many quarrels they all had together
When at length these ladies were equipped to their satisfaction they made their appearance but before any conversation was suffered to pass between them and us they had a long and most disagreeable dialogue with their father to whose reprimands though so justly incurred they replied with the utmost pertness while their brother all the time laughed aloud
The moment they perceived this they were so much provoked that instead of making any apologies to Madame Duval they next began to quarrel with him Tom what do you laugh for I wonder what business you have to be always a laughing when Papa scolds us
Then what business have you to be such a while getting on your clothes Youre never ready you know well enough
Lord Sir I wonder whats that to you I wish youd mind your own affairs and not trouble yourself about ours How should a boy like you know any thing
A boy indeed not such a boy neither Ill warrant youll be glad to be as young when you come to be old maids
This sort of dialogue we were amused with till dinner was ready when we again mounted up two pairs of stairs
In our way Miss Polly told me that her sister had asked Mr Smith for his room to dine in but he had refused to lend it because she said one day it happened to be a little greased however we shall have it to drink tea in and then perhaps you may see him and I assure you hes quite like one of the quality and dresses as fine and goes to balls and dances and every thing quite in taste and besides Miss he keeps a footboy of his own too
The dinner was illserved illcooked and illmanaged The maid who waited had so often to go down stairs for something that was forgotten that the Branghtons were perpetually obliged to rise from table themselves to get plates knives and forks bread or beer Had they been without pretensions all this would have seemed of no consequence but they aimed at appearing to advantage and even fancied they succeeded However the most disagreeable part of our fare was that the whole family continually disputed whose turn it was to rise and whose to be allowed to sit still
When this meal was over Madame Duval ever eager to discourse upon her travels entered into an argument with Mr Branghton and in broken English M Du Bois concerning the French nation and Miss Polly then addressing herself to me said Dont you think Miss its very dull sitting up stairs here wed better go down to shop and then we shall see the people go by
Lord Poll said the brother youre always wanting to be staring and gaping and Im sure you neednt be so fond of showing yourself for youre ugly enough to frighten a horse
Ugly indeed I wonder which is best you or me But I tell you what Tom youve no need to give yourself such airs for if you do Ill tell Miss ofyou know what
Who cares if you do you may tell what you will I dont mind
Indeed cried I I do not desire to hear any secrets
O but Im resolved Ill tell you because Toms so very spiteful You must know Miss tother night
Poll cried the brother if you tell of that Miss shall know all about your meeting young Brownyou know whenSo Ill be quits with you one way or other
Miss Polly coloured and again proposed our going down stairs till
Mr Smiths room was ready for our reception
Aye so we will said Miss Branghton Ill assure you cousin we have some very genteel people pass by our shop sometimes Polly and I always go and sit there when weve cleaned ourselves
Yes Miss cried the brother they do nothing else all day long when father dont scold them But the best fun is when theyve got all their dirty things on and all their hair about their ears sometimes I send young Brown up stairs to them and then theres such a fussThere they hide themselves and run away and squeal and squall like any thing mad and so then I puts the two cats into the room and I gives them a good whipping and so that sets them a squalling too so theres such a noise and such an uproarLord you cant think Miss what fun it is
This occasioned a fresh quarrel with the sisters at the end of which it was at length decided that we should go to the shop
In our way down stairs Miss Branghton said aloud I wonder when
Mr Smiths room will be ready
So do I answered Polly Im sure we should not do any harm to it now
This hint had not the desired effect for we were suffered to proceed very quietly
As we entered the shop I observed a young man in deep mourning leaning against the wall with his arms folded and his eyes fixed on the ground apparently in profound and melancholy meditation but the moment he perceived us he started and making a passing bow very abruptly retired As I found he was permitted to go quite unnoticed I could not forbear enquiring who he was
Lord answered Miss Branghton hes nothing but a poor Scotch poet
For my part said Miss Polly I believe hes just starved for I dont find he has anything to live upon
Live upon cried the brother why hes a poet you know so he may live upon learning
Aye and good enough for him too said Miss Branghton for hes as proud as hes poor
Like enough replied the brother but for all that you wont find he will live without meat and drink no no catch a Scotchman at that if you can why they only come here for what they can get
Im sure said Miss Branghton I wonder Papall be such a fool as to let him stay in the house for I dare say hell never pay for his lodging
Why no more he would if he could get another lodger You know the bill has been put up this fortnight Miss if you should hear of a person that wants a room I assure you it is a very good one for all its up three pair of stairs
I answered that as I had no acquaintance in London I had not any chance of assisting them but both my compassion and my curiosity were excited for this poor young man and I asked them some further particulars concerning him
They then acquainted me that they had only known him three months When he first lodged with them he agreed to board also but had lately told them he would eat by himself though they all believed he had hardly ever tasted a morsel of meat since he left their table They said that he had always appeared very lowspirited but for the last month he had been duller than ever and all of a sudden he had put himself into mourning though they knew not for whom nor for what but they supposed it was only for convenience as no person had ever been to see or enquire for him since his residence amongst them and they were sure he was very poor as he had not paid for his lodgings the last three weeks and finally they concluded he was a poet or else halfcrazy because they had at different times found scraps of poetry in his room
They then produced some unfinished verses written on small pieces of paper unconnected and of a most melancholy cast Among them was the fragment of an ode which at my request they lent to me to copy and as you may perhaps like to see it I will write it now
O LIFE thou lingering dream of grief of pain And every
ill that Nature can sustain
Strange mutable and wild
Now flattering with Hope most fair Depressing now with
fell Despair
The nurse of Guilt the slave of Pride
That like a wayward child
Who to himself a foe
Sees joy alone in whats denied
In what is granted woe
O thou poor feeble fleeting powr By Vice seducd by
Folly wood By Misry Shame Remorse pursud And as thy
toilsome steps proceed Seeming to Youth the fairest flowr
Proving to Age the rankest weed
A gilded but a bitter pill
Of varied great and complicated ill
These lines are harsh but they indicate an internal wretchedness which I own affects me Surely this young man must be involved in misfortunes of no common nature but I cannot imagine what can induce him to remain with this unfeeling family where he is most unworthily despised for being poor and most illiberally detested for being a Scotchman He may indeed have motives which he cannot surmount for submitting to such a situation Whatever they are I most heartily pity him and cannot but wish it were in my power to afford him some relief
During this conversation Mr Smiths footboy came to Miss Branghton and informed her that his master said she might have the room now when she liked it for that he was presently going out
This very genteel message though it perfectly satisfied the Miss Branghtons by no means added to my desire of being introduced to this gentleman and upon their rising with intention to accept his offer I begged they would excuse my attending them and said I would sit with Madame Duval till the tea was ready
I therefore once more went up two pair of stairs with young
Branghton who insisted upon accompanying me and there we remained
till Mr Smiths footboy summoned us to tea when I followed Madame
Duval into the diningroom
The Miss Branghtons were seated at one window and Mr Smith was lolling indolently out of the other They all approached us at our entrance and Mr Smith probably to show he was master of the department most officiously handed me to a great chair at the upper end of the room without taking any notice of Madame Duval till I rose and offered her my own seat
Leaving the rest of the company to entertain themselves he very abruptly began to address himself to me in a style of gallantry equally new and disagreeable to me It is true no man can possibly pay me greater compliments or make more fine speeches than Sir Clement Willoughby yet his language though too flowery is always that of a gentleman and his address and manners are so very superior to those of the inhabitants of this house that to make any comparison between him and Mr Smith would be extremely unjust This latter seems very desirous of appearing a man of gaiety and spirit but his vivacity is so lowbred and his whole behaviour so forward and disagreeable that I should prefer the company of dullness itself even as that goddess is described by Pope to that of this sprightly young man
He made many apologies that he had not lent his room for our dinner which he said he should certainly have done had he seen me first and he assured me that when I came again he should be very glad to oblige me
I told him and with sincerity that every part of the house was equally indifferent to me
Why Maam the truth is Miss Biddy and Polly take no care of any thing else Im sure they should be always welcome to my room for Im never so happy as in obliging the ladiesthats my character Maambut really the last time they had it every thing was made so greasy and so nasty that upon my word to a man who wishes to have things a little genteel it was quite cruel Now as to you Maam its quite another thing for I should not mind if every thing I had was spoilt for the sake of having the pleasure to oblige you and I assure you Maam it makes me quite happy that I have a room good enough to receive you
This elegant speech was followed by many others so much in the same style that to write them would be superfluous and as he did not allow me a moment to speak to any other person the rest of the evening was consumed in a painful attention to this irksome young man who seemed to intend appearing before me to the utmost advantage
Adieu my dear Sir I fear you will be sick of reading about this family yet I must write of them or not of any since I mix with no other Happy I shall be when I quit them all and again return to Berry Hill
LETTER XLIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION
June 10th THIS morning Mr Smith called on purpose he said to offer me a ticket for the next Hampstead assembly I thanked him but desired to be excused accepting it he would not however be denied nor answered and in a manner both vehement and free pressed and urged his offer till I was wearied to death but when he found me resolute he seemed thunderstruck with amazement and thought proper to desire I would tell him my reasons
Obvious as they must surely have been to any other person they were such as I knew not how to repeat to him and when he found I hesitated he said Indeed Maam you are too modest I assure you the ticket is quite at your service and I shall be very happy to dance with you so pray dont be so coy
Indeed Sir returned I you are mistaken I never supposed you would offer a ticket without wishing it should be accepted but it would answer no purpose to mention the reasons which make me decline it since they cannot possibly be removed
This speech seemed very much to mortify him which I could not be concerned at as I did not choose to be treated by him with so much freedom When he was at last convinced that his application to me was ineffectual he addressed himself to Madame Duval and begged she would interfere in his favour offering at the same time to procure another ticket for herself
Ma foi Sir answered she angrily you might as well have had the complaisance to ask me before for I assure you I dont approve of no such rudeness however you may keep your tickets to yourself for we dont want none of em
This rebuke almost overset him he made many apologies and said that he should certainly have first applied to her but that he had no notion the young lady would have refused him and on the contrary had concluded that she would have assisted him to persuade Madame Duval herself
This excuse appeased her and he pleaded his cause so successfully that to my great chagrin he gained it and Madame Duval promised that she would go herself and take me to the Hampstead assembly whenever he pleased
Mr Smith then approaching me with an air of triumph said Well
Maam now I think you cant possibly keep to your denial
I made no answer and he soon took leave tho not till he had so wonderfully gained the favour of Madame Duval that she declared when he was gone he was the prettiest young man she had seen since she came to England
As soon as I could find an opportunity I ventured in the most humble manner to intreat Madame Duval would not insist upon my attending her to this ball and represented to her as well as I was able the impropriety of my accepting any present from a man so entirely unknown to me but she laughed at my scruples called me a foolish ignorant countrygirl and said she should make it her business to teach me something of the world
This ball is to be next week I am sure it is not more improper for than unpleasant to me and I will use every possible endeavour to avoid it Perhaps I may apply to Miss Branghton for advice as I believe she will be willing to assist me from disliking equally with myself that I should dance with Mr Smith
June 11th
O my dear Sir I have been shocked to death and yet at the same time delighted beyond expression in the hope that I have happily been the instrument of saving a human creature from destruction
This morning Madame Duval said she would invite the Branghton family to return our visit tomorrow and not choosing to rise herselffor she generally spends the morning in bedshe desired me to wait upon them with her message M Du Bois who just then called insisted upon attending me
Mr Branghton was in the shop and told us that his son and daughter were out but desired me to step up stairs as he very soon expected them home This I did leaving M Du Bois below I went into the room where we had dined the day before and by a wonderful chance I happened to seat myself that I had a view of the stairs and yet could not be seen from them
In about ten minutes time I saw passing by the door with a look perturbed and affrighted the same young man I mentioned in my last letter Not heeding as I suppose how he went in turning the corner of the stairs which are narrow and winding his foot slipped and he fell but almost instantly rising I plainly perceived the end of a pistol which started from his pocket by hitting against the stairs
I was inexpressibly shocked All that I had heard of his misery occurring to my memory made me conclude that he was at that very moment meditating suicide Struck with the dreadful idea all my strength seemed to fail me He moved on slowly yet I soon lost sight of him I sat motionless with terror all power of action forsook me and I grew almost stiff with horror till recollecting that it was yet possible to prevent the fatal deed all my faculties seemed to return with the hope of saving him
My first thought was to fly to Mr Branghton but I feared that an instant of time lost might for ever be rued and therefore guided by the impulse of my apprehensions as well as I was able I followed him up stairs stepping very softly and obliged to support myself by the banisters
When I came within a few stairs of the landingplace I stopped for I could then see into his room as he had not yet shut the door
He had put the pistol upon a table and had his hand in his pocket whence in a few moments he took out another he then emptied something on the table from a small leather bag after which taking up both the pistols one in each hand he dropt hastily upon his knees and called out O Godforgive me
In a moment strength and courage seemed lent to me as by inspiration I started and rushing precipitately into the room just caught his arm and then overcome by my own fears I fell down at his side breathless and senseless My recovery however was I believe almost instantaneous and then the sight of this unhappy man regarding me with a look of unutterable astonishment mixed with concern presently restored to me my recollection I arose though with difficulty he did the same the pistols as I soon saw were both on the floor
Unwilling to leave them and indeed too weak to move I leant one hand on the table and then stood perfectly still while he his eyes cast wildly towards me seemed too infinitely amazed to be capable of either speech or action
I believe we were some minutes in this extraordinary situation but as my strength returned I felt myself both ashamed and awkward and moved towards the door Pale and motionless he suffered me to pass without changing his posture or uttering a syllable and indeed
He lookd a bloodless image of despairPOPE
When I reached the door I turned round I looked fearfully at the pistols and impelled by an emotion I could not repress I hastily stepped back with an intention of carrying them away but their wretched owner perceiving my design and recovering from his astonishment darting suddenly down seized them both himself
Wild with fright and scarce knowing what I did I caught almost involuntarily hold of both his arms and exclaimed O Sir have mercy on yourself
The guilty pistols fell from his hands which disengaging from me he fervently clasped and cried Sweet Heaven is this thy angel
Encouraged by such gentleness I again attempted to take the pistols but with a look half frantic he again prevented me saying What would you do
Awaken you I cried with a courage I now wonder at to worthier thoughts and rescue you from perdition
I then seized the pistols he said not a wordhe made no effort to stop meI glided quick by him and tottered down stairs ere he had recovered from the extremest amazement
The moment I reached again the room I had so fearfully left I threw away the pistols and flinging myself on the first chair gave free vent to the feelings I had most painfully stifled in a violent burst of tears which indeed proved a happy relief to me
In this situation I remained some time but when at length I lifted up my head the first object I saw was the poor man who had occasioned my terror standing as if petrified at the door and gazing at me with eyes of wild wonder
I started from the chair but trembled so excessively that I almost instantly sunk again into it He then though without advancing and in a faultering voice said Whoever or whatever you are relieve me I pray you from the suspense under which my soul laboursand tell me if indeed I do not dream
To this address so singular and so solemn I had not then the presence of mind to frame any answer but as I presently perceived that his eyes turned from me to the pistols and that he seemed to intend regaining them I exerted all my strength and saying O for Heavens sake forbear I rose and took them myself
Do my sense deceive me cried he do I live And do you
As he spoke he advanced towards me and I still guarding the pistols retreated saying No noyou must notmust not have them
Whyfor what purpose tell medo you withhold them
To give you time to thinkto save you from eternal misery and
I hope to reserve you for mercy and forgiveness
Wonderful cried he with uplifted hands and eyes most wonderful
For some time he seemed wrapped in deep thought till a sudden noise of tongues below announcing the approach of the Branghtons made him start from his reverie he sprung hastily forward dropt on one kneecaught hold of my gown which he pressed to his lips and then quick as lightning he rose and flew up stairs to his own room
There was something in the whole of this extraordinary and shocking adventure really too affecting to be borne and so entirely had I spent my spirits and exhausted my courage that before the Branghtons reached me I had sunk on the ground without sense or motion
I believe I must have been a very horrid sight to them on their entrance into the room for to all appearance I seemed to have suffered a violent death either by my own rashness or the cruelty of some murderer as the pistols had fallen close by my side
How soon I recovered I know not but probably I was more indebted to the loudness of their cries than to their assistance for they all concluded that I was dead and for some time did not make any effort to revive me
Scarcely could I recollect where or indeed what I was ere they poured upon me such a torrent of questions and enquiries that I was almost stunned by their vociferation However as soon and as well as I was able I endeavoured to satisfy their curiosity by recounting what had happened as clearly as was in my power They all looked aghast at the recital but not being well enough to enter into any discussions I begged to have a chair called and to return instantly home
Before I left them I recommended with great earnestness a vigilant observance of their unhappy lodger and that they would take care to keep from him if possible all means of selfdestruction
M Du Bois who seemed extremely concerned at my indisposition walked by the side of the chair and saw me safe to my own apartment
The rashness and the misery of this illfated young man engross all my thoughts If indeed he is bent upon destroying himself all efforts to save him will be fruitless How much do I wish it were in my power to discover the nature of the malady which thus maddens him and to offer or to procure alleviation to his sufferings I am sure my dearest Sir you will be much concerned for this poor man and were you here I doubt not but you would find some method of awakening him from the error which blinds him and of pouring the balm of peace and comfort into his afflicted soul
LETTER XLIV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Holborn June 13th
YESTERDAY all the Branghtons dined here Our conversation was almost wholly concerning the adventure of the day before Mr Branghton said that his first thought was instantly to turn his lodger out of doors Lest continued he his killing himself in my house should bring me into any trouble but then I was afraid I should never get the money that he owes me whereas if he dies in my house I have a right to all he leaves behind him if he goes off in my debt Indeed I would put him in prisonbut what should I get by that he could not earn anything there to pay me so I considered about it some time and then I determined to ask him pointblank for my money out of hand And so I did but he told me hed pay me next week however I gave him to understand that though I was no Scotchman yet I did not like to be overreached any more than he so he then gave me a ring which to my certain knowledge must be worth ten guineas and told me he would not part with it for his life and a good deal more such sort of stuff but that I might keep it until he could pay me
It is ten to one father said young Branghton if he came fairly by it
Very likely not answered he but that will make no great difference for I shall be able to prove my right to it all one
What principles I could hardly stay in the room
Im determined said the son Ill take some opportunity to affront him soon now I know how poor he is because of the airs he gave himself when he first came
And pray how was that child said Madame Duval
Why you never knew such a fuss in your life as he made because one day at dinner I only happened to say that I supposed he had never got such a good meal in his life before he came to England there he fell in such a passion as you cant think but for my part I took no notice of it for to be sure thinks I he must needs be a gentleman or hed never go to be so angry about it However he wont put his tricks upon me again in a hurry
Well said Miss Polly hes grown quite another creature to what he was and he doesnt run away from us nor hide himself nor any thing and hes as civil as can be and hes always in the shop and he saunters about the stairs and he looks at every body as comes in
Why you may see what hes after plain enough said Mr Branghton he wants to see Miss again
Ha ha ha Lord how I should laugh said the son if he should have fell in love with Miss
Im sure said Miss Branghton Miss is welcome but for my part
I should be quite ashamed of such a beggarly conquest
Such was the conversation till teatime when the appearance of
Mr Smith gave a new turn to the discourse
Miss Branghton desired me to remark with what a smart air he entered the room and asked me if he had not very much a quality look
Come cried he advancing to us you ladies must not sit together wherever I go I always make it a rule to part the ladies
And then handing Miss Branghton to the next chair he seated himself between us
Well now ladies I think we sit very well What say you for my part I think it was a very good motion
If my cousin likes it said Miss Branghton Im sure Ive no objection
O cried he I always study what the ladies likethats my first thought And indeed it is but natural that you should like best to sit by the gentlemen for what can you find to say to one another
Say cried young Branghton O never you think of that theyll find enough to say Ill be sworn You know the women are never tired of talking
Come come Tom said Mr Smith dont be severe upon the ladies when Im by you know I always take their part
Soon after when Miss Branghton offered me some cake this man of gallantry said Well if I was that lady Id never take any thing from a woman
Why not Sir
Because I should be afraid of being poisoned for being so handsome
Who is severe upon the ladies now said I
Why really Maam it was a slip of the tongue I did not intend to say such a thing but one cant always be on ones guard
Soon after the conversation turning upon public places young
Branghton asked if I had ever been to Georges at Hampstead
Indeed I never heard the place mentioned
Didnt you Miss cried he eagerly why then youve a deal of fun to come Ill promise you and I tell you what Ill treat you there some Sunday soon So now Bid and Poll be sure you dont tell Miss about the chairs and all that for Ive a mind to surprise her and if I pay I think Ive a right to have it my own way
Georges at Hampstead repeated Mr Smith contemptuously how came you to think the young lady would like to go to such a low place as that But pray Maam have you ever been to Don Salteros at Chelsea
No Sir
Nonay then I must insist on having the pleasure of conducting you there before long I assure you Maam many genteel people go or else I give you my word I should not recommend it
Pray cousin said Mr Branghton have you been at Sadlers
Wells yet
No Sir
No why then youve seen nothing
Pray Miss said the son how do you like the Tower of London
I have never been to it Sir
Goodness exclaimed he not seen the Towerwhy may be you hant been o top of the Monument neither
No indeed I have not
Why then you might as well not have come to London for aught I see for youve been no where
Pray Miss said Polly have you been all over Pauls Church yet
No Maam
Well but Maam said Mr Smith how do you like Vauxhall and
Marybone
I never saw either Sir
NoGod bless meyou really surprise mewhy Vauxhall is the first pleasure in lifeI know nothing like itWell Maam you must have been with strange people indeed not to have taken you to Vauxhall Why you have seen nothing of London yet However we must try if we cant make you amends
In the course of this catechism many other places were mentioned of which I have forgotten the names but the looks of surprise and contempt that my repeated negatives incurred were very diverting
Come said Mr Smith after tea as this lady has been with such a queer set of people lets show her the difference suppose we go somewhere tonightI love to do things with spiritCome ladies where shall we go For my part I should like Footesbut the ladies must choose I never speak myself
Well Mr Smith is always in such spirits said Miss Branghton
Why yes Maam yes thank God pretty good spiritsI have not yet the cares of the world upon meI am not marriedha ha hayoull excuse me ladiesbut I cant help laughing
No objection being made to my great relief we all proceeded to the little theatre in the Haymarket where I was extremely entertained by the performance of the Minor and the Commissary
They all returned hither to supper
LETTER XLV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION June 15th
YESTERDAY morning Madame Duval again sent me to Mr Branghtons attended by M Du Bois to make some party for the evening because she had had the vapours the preceding day from staying at home
As I entered the shop I perceived the unfortunate North Briton seated in a corner with a book in his hand He cast his melancholy eyes up as we came in and I believe immediately recollected my facefor he started and changed colour I delivered Madame Duvals message to Mr Branghton who told me I should find Polly up stairs but that the others were gone out
Up stairs therefore I went and seated on a window with Mr Brown at her side sat Miss Polly I felt a little awkward at disturbing them and much more so at their behaviour afterwards for as soon as the common enquiries were over Mr Brown grew so fond and so foolish that I was extremely disgusted Polly all the time only rebuked him with La now Mr Brown do be quiet cant youyou should not behave so before companyWhy now what will Miss think of meWhile her looks plainly showed not merely the pleasure but the pride which she took in his caresses
I did not by any means think it necessary to punish myself by witnessing their tenderness and therefore telling them I would see if Miss Branghton were returned home I soon left them and against descended into the shop
So Miss youve come again said Mr Branghton what I suppose youve a mind to sit a little in the shop and see how the world goes hey Miss
I made no answer and M Du Bois instantly brought me a chair
The unhappy stranger who had risen at my entrance again seated himself and though his head leant towards his book I could not help observing his eyes were most intently and earnestly turned towards me
M Du Bois as well as his broken English would allow him endeavoured to entertain us till the return of Miss Branghton and her brother
Lord how tired I am cried the former I have not a foot to stand upon And then without any ceremony she flung herself into the chair from which I had risen to receive her
You tired said the brother why then what must I be that have walked twice as far And with equal politeness he paid the same compliment to M Du Bois which his sister had done to me
Two chairs and three stools completed the furniture of the shop and Mr Branghton who chose to keep his own seat himself desired M Du Bois to take another and then seeing that I was without any called out to the stranger Come Mr Macartney lend us your stool
Shocked at their rudeness I declined the offer and approaching Miss Branghton said If you will be so good as to make room for me on your chair there will be no occasion to disturb that gentleman
Lord what signifies that cried the brother he has had his share of sitting Ill be sworn
And if he has not said the sister he has a chair up stairs and the shop is our own I hope
This grossness so much disgusted me that I took the stool and carrying it back to Mr Macartney myself I returned him thanks as civilly as I could for his politeness but said that I had rather stand
He looked at me as if unaccustomed to such attention bowed very respectfully but neither spoke nor yet made use of it
I soon found that I was an object of derision to all present except M Du Bois and therefore I begged Mr Branghton would give me an answer for Madame Duval as I was in haste to return
Well then TomBiddy where have you a mind to go tonight your aunt and Miss want to be abroad and amongst them
Why then Papa said Miss Branghton well go to Don Salteros Mr Smith likes that place so may be hell go along with us
No no said the son Im for WhiteConduit House so lets go there
WhiteConduit House indeed cried his sister no Tom that
I wont
Why then let it alone nobody wants your companywe shall do as well without you Ill be sworn and better too
Ill tell you what Tom if you dont hold your tongue Ill make you repent itthat I assure you
Just then Mr Smith came into the shop which he seemed to intend passing through but when he saw me he stopped and began a most courteous enquiry after my health protesting that had he known I was there he should have come down sooner But bless me Maam added he what is the reason you stand and then he flew to bring me the seat from which I had just parted
Mr Smith you are come in very good time said Mr Branghton to end a dispute between my son and daughter about where they shall all go tonight
O fie Tomdispute with a lady cried Mr Smith Now as for me Im for where you will provided this young lady is of the partyone place is the same as another to me so that it be but agreeable to the ladiesI would go any where with you Maam to me unless indeed it were to church ha ha haYoull excuse me Maam but really I never could conquer my fear of a parsonha ha haReally ladies I beg your pardon for being so rude but I cant help laughing for my life
I was just saying Mr Smith said Miss Branghton that I should like to go to Don Salterosnow pray where should you like to go
Why really Miss Biddy you know I always let the ladies decide I never fix any thing myself but I should suppose it would be rather hot at the coffeehousehowever pray ladies settle it among yourselvesIm agreeable to whatever you choose
It was easy for me to discover that this man with all his parade of conformity objects to every thing that is not proposed by himself but he is so much admired by this family for his gentility that he thinks himself a complete fine gentleman
Come said Mr Branghton the best way will be to put it to the vote and then every body will speak their minds Biddy call Poll down stairs Well start fair
Lord Papa said Miss Branghton why cant you as well send
Tomyoure always sending me of the errands
A dispute then ensued but Miss Branghton was obliged to yield
When Mr Brown and Miss Polly made their appearance the latter uttered many complaints of having been called saying she did not want to come and was very well where she was
Now ladies your votes cried Mr Smith and so Maam to me well begin with you What place shall you like best and then in a whisper he added I assure you I shall say the same as you do whether I like it or not
I said that as I was ignorant what choice was in my power I must beg to hear their decisions first This was reluctantly assented to and then Miss Branghton voted for Salteros Coffeehouse her sister for a party to Mother Red Caps the brother for WhiteConduit House Mr Brown for Bagnigge Wells Mr Braughton for Sadlers Wells and Mr Smith for Vauxhall
Well now Maam said Mr Smith we have all spoken and so you must give the casting vote Come what will you fix upon
Sir answered I I was to speak last
Well so you will said Miss Branghton for weve all spoke first
Pardon me returned I the voting has not yet been quite general
And I turned towards Mr Macartney to whom I wished extremely to show that I was not of the same brutal nature with those by whom he was treated so grossly
Why pray said Mr Branghton who have we left out would you have the cats and dogs vote
No Sir cried I with some spirit I would have that gentleman voteif indeed he is not superior to joining our party
They all looked at me as if they doubted whether or not they had heard me right but in a few moments their surprise gave way to a rude burst of laughter
Very much displeased I told M Du Bois that if he was not ready to go I would have a coach called for myself
O yes he said he was always ready to attend me
Mr Smith then advancing attempted to take my hand and begged me not to leave them till I had settled the evenings plans
I have nothing Sir said I to do with it as it is my intention to stay at home and therefore Mr Branghton will be so good as to send Madame Duval word what place is fixed upon when it is convenient to him
And then making a slight courtesy I left them
How much does my disgust for these people increase my pity for poor Mr Macartney I will not see them when I can avoid so doing but I am determined to take every opportunity in my power to show civility to this unhappy man whose misfortunes with this family only render him an object of scorn I was however very well pleased with M Du Bois who far from joining in their mirth expressed himself extremely shocked at their illbreeding
We had not walked ten yards before we were followed by Mr Smith who came to make excuses and to assure me they were only joking and hoped I took nothing ill for if I did he would make a quarrel of it himself with the Branghtons rather than I should receive any offense
I begged him not to take any trouble about so immaterial an affair and assured him I should not myself He was so officious that he would not be prevailed upon to return home till he had walked with us to Mr Dawkinss
Madame Duval was very much displeased that I brought her so little satisfaction WhiteConduit House was at last fixed upon and notwithstanding my great dislike of such parties and such places I was obliged to accompany them
Very disagreeable and much according to my expectations the evening proved There were many people all smart and gaudy and so pert and lowbred that I could hardly endure being amongst them but the party to which unfortunately I belonged seemed all at home
LETTER XLVI
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Holborn June 17th
YESTERDAY Mr Smith carried his point of making a party for Vauxhall consisting of Madame Duval M Du Bois all the Branghtons Mr Brown himselfand mefor I find all endeavours vain to escape any thing which these people desire I should not
There were twenty disputes previous to our setting out first as to the time of our going Mr Branghton his son and young Brown were for six oclock and all the ladies and Mr Smith were for eightthe latter however conquered
Then as to the way we should go some were for a boat others for a coach and Mr Branghton himself was for walking but the boat at length was decided upon Indeed this was the only part of the expedition that was agreeable to me for the Thames was delightfully pleasant
The garden is very pretty but too formal I should have been better pleased had it consisted less of straight walks where
Grove nods at grove each alley has its brother
The trees the numerous lights and the company in the circle round the orchestra make a most brilliant and gay appearance and had I been with a party less disagreeable to me I should have thought it a place formed for animation and pleasure There was a concert in the course of which a hautbois concerto was so charmingly played that I could have thought myself upon enchanted ground had I had spirits more gentle to associate with The hautbois in the open air is heavenly
Mr Smith endeavoured to attach himself to me with such officious assiduity and impertinent freedom that he quite sickened me Indeed M Du Bois was the only man of the party to whom voluntarily I ever addressed myself He is civil and respectful and I have found nobody else so since I left Howard Grove His English is very bad but I prefer it to speaking French myself which I dare not venture to do I converse with him frequently both to disengage myself from others and to oblige Madame Duval who is always pleased when he is attended to
As we were walking about the orchestra I heard a bell ring and in a moment Mr Smith flying up to me caught my hand and with a motion too quick to be resisted ran away with me many yards before I had breath to ask his meaning though I struggled as well as I could to get from him At last however I insisted upon stopping Stopping Maam cried he why we must run on or we shall lose the cascade
And then again he hurried me away mixing with a crowd of people all running with so much velocity that I could not imagine what had raised such an alarm We were soon followed by the rest of the party and my surprise and ignorance proved a source of diversion to them all which was not exhausted the whole evening Young Branghton in particular laughed till he could hardly stand
The scene of the cascade I thought extremely pretty and the general effect striking and lively
But this was not the only surprise which was to divert them at my expense for they led me about the garden purposely to enjoy my first sight of various other deceptions
About ten oclock Mr Smith having chosen a box in a very conpicuous place we all went to supper Much fault was found with every thing that was ordered though not a morsel of any thing was left and the dearness of the provisions with conjectures upon what profit was made by them supplied discourse during the whole meal
When wine and cyder were brought Mr Smith said Now lets enjoy ourselves now is the time or never Well Maam and how do you like Vauxhall
Like it cried young Branghton why how can she help liking it she has never seen such a place before that Ill answer for
For my part said Miss Branghton I like it because it is not vulgar
This must have been a fine treat for you Miss said Mr Branghton why I suppose you was never so happy in all your life before
I endeavoured to express my satisfaction with some pleasure yet
I believe they were much amazed at my coldness
Miss ought to stay in town till the last night said young Branghton and then its my belief shed say something to it Why Lord its the best night of any theres always a riotand there the folks run aboutand then theres such squealing and squallingand there all the lamps are brokeand the women run skimper scamperI declare I would not take five guineas to miss the last night
I was very glad when they all grew tired of sitting and called for the waiter to pay the bill The Miss Branghtons said they would walk on while the gentlemen settled the account and asked me to accompany them which however I declined
You girls may do as you please said Madame Duval but as to me
I promise you I shant go nowhere without the gentlemen
No more I suppose will my cousin said Miss Branghton looking reproachfully towards Mr Smith
This reflection which I feared would flatter his vanity made me most unfortunately request Madame Duvals permission to attend them She granted it and away we went having promised to meet in the room
To the room therefore I would immediately have gone but the sisters agreed that they would first have a little pleasure and they tittered and talked so loud that they attracted universal notice
Lord Polly said the eldest suppose we were to take a turn in the dark walks
Aye do answered she and then well hide ourselves and then
Mr Brown will think we are lost
I remonstrated very warmly against this plan telling them it would endanger our missing the rest of the party all the evening
O dear cried Miss Branghton I thought how uneasy Miss would be without a beau
This impertinence I did not think worth answering and quite by compulsion I followed them down a long alley in which there was hardly any light
By the time we came near the end a large party of gentlemen apparently very riotous and who were hallooing leaning on one another and laughing immoderately seemed to rush suddenly from behind some trees and meeting us face to face put their arms at their sides and formed a kind of circle which first stopped our proceeding and then our retreating for we were presently entirely enclosed The Miss Branghtons screamed aloud and I was frightened exceedingly our screams were answered with bursts of laughter and for some minutes we were kept prisoners till at last one of them rudely seizing hold of me said I was a pretty little creature
Terrified to death I struggled with such vehemence to disengage myself from him that I succeeded in spite of his efforts to detain me and immediately and with a swiftness which fear only could have given me I flew rather than ran up the walk hoping to secure my safety by returning to the lights and company we had so foolishly left but before I could possibly accomplish my purpose I was met by another party of men one of whom placed himself so directly in my way calling out Whither so fast my lovethat I could only have proceeded by running into his arms
In a moment both my hands by different persons were caught hold of and one of them in a most familiar manner desired when I ran next to accompany me in a race while the rest of the party stood still and laughed
I was almost distracted with terror and so breathless with running that I could not speak till another advancing said I was as handsome as an angel and desired to be of the party I then just articulated For Heavens sake gentlemen let me pass
Another then rushing suddenly forward exclaimed Heaven and earth What voice is that
The voice of the prettiest little actress I have seen this age answered one of my persecutors
Nonono I panted out I am no actresspray let me gopray let me pass
By all thats sacred cried the same voice which I then knew for
Sir Clement Willoughbys tis herself
Sir Clement Willoughby cried I O Sir assistassist meor I shall die with terror
Gentlemen cried he disengaging them all from me in an instant pray leave this lady to me
Loud laughs proceeded from every mouth and two or three said Willoughby has all the luck But one of them in a passionate manner vowed he would not give me up for that he had the first right to me and would support it
You are mistaken said Sir Clement this lady isI will explain myself to you another time but I assure you you are all mistaken
And then taking my willing hand he led me off amidst the loud acclamations laughter and gross merriment of his impertinent companions
As soon as we had escaped from them Sir Clement with a voice of surprise exclaimed My dearest creature what wonder what strange revolution has brought you to such a place as this
Ashamed of my situation and extremely mortified to be thus recognized by him I was for some time silent and when he repeated his question only stammered out I haveI hardly know howlost from my party
He caught my hand and eagerly pressing it in a passionate voice said
O that I had sooner met with thee
Surprised at a freedom so unexpected I angrily broke from him saying
Is this the protection you give me Sir Clement
And then I saw what the perturbation of my mind had prevented my sooner noticing that he had led me though I know not how into another of the dark alleys instead of the place whither I meant to go
Good God I cried where am IWhat way are you going
Where answered he we shall be least observed
Astonished at this speech I stopped short and declared I would go no further
And why not my angel again endeavouring to take my hand
My heart beat with resentment I pushed him away from me with all my strength and demanded how he dared treat me with such insolence
Insolence repeated he
Yes Sir Clement insolence from you who know me I had a claim for protectionnot to such treatment as this
By Heaven cried he with warmth you distract mewhy tell mewhy do I see you hereIs this a place for Miss Anvillethese dark walksno party no companionby all thats good I can scarce believe my senses
Extremely offended at this speech I turned angrily from him and not deigning to make any answer walked on towards that part of the garden whence I perceived the lights and company
He followed me but we were both some time silent
So you will not explain to me your situation said he at length
No Sir answered I disdainfully
Nor yetsuffer me to make my own interpretation
I could not bear this strange manner of speaking it made my very soul shudderand I burst into tears
He flew to me and actually flung himself at my feet as if regardless who might see him saying O Miss Anvilleloveliest of womenforgive mymyI beseech you forgive meif I have offendedif I have hurt youI could kill myself at the thought
No matter Sir no matter cried I if I can but find my friendsI will never speak tonever see you again
Good Godgood Heaven My dearest life what is it I have donewhat is it I have said
You best know Sir what and why but dont hold me herelet me be gone and do you
Not till you forgive meI cannot part with you in anger
For shame for shame Sir cried I indignantly do you suppose I am to be thus compelleddo you take advantage of the absence of my friends to affront me
No Madam cried he rising I would sooner forfeit my life than act so mean a part But you have flung me into amazement unspeakable and you will not condescend to listen to my request of giving me some explanation
The manner Sir said I in which you spoke that request made and will make me scorn to answer it
ScornI will own to you I expected not such displeasure from
Miss Anville
Perhaps Sir if you had you would less voluntarily have merited it
My dearest life surely it must be known to you that the man does not breathe who adores you so passionately so fervently so tenderly as I doWhy then will you delight in perplexing mein keeping me in suspensein torturing me with doubt
I Sir delight in perplexing youyou are much mistakenYour suspense your doubts your perplexitiesare of your own creating and believe me Sir they may offend but they can never delight mebut as you have yourself raised you must yourself satisfy them
Good Godthat such haughtiness and such sweetness can inhabit the same mansion
I made no answer but quickening my pace I walked on silently and sullenly till this most impetuous of men snatching my hand which he grasped with violence besought me to forgive him with such earnestness of supplication that merely to escape his importunities I was forced to speak and in some measure to grant the pardon he requested though it was accorded with a very ill grace but indeed I knew not how to resist the humility of his intreaties yet never shall I recollect the occasion he gave me of displeasure without feeling it renewed
We now soon arrived in the midst of the general crowd and my own safety being then insured I grew extremely uneasy for the Miss Branghtons whose danger however imprudently incurred by their own folly I too well knew how to tremble for To this consideration all my pride of heart yielded and I determined to seek my party with the utmost speed though not without a sigh did I recollect the fruitless attempt I had made after the opera of concealing from this man my unfortunate connections which I was now obliged to make known
I hastened therefore to the room with a view of sending young
Branghton to the aid of his sisters In a very short time I perceived
Madame Duval and the rest looking at one of the paintings
I must own to you honestly my dear Sir that an involuntary repugnance seized me at presenting such a set to Sir Clementhe who had been used to see me in parties so differentMy pace slackened as I approached thembut they presently perceived me
Ah Mademoiselle cried M Du Bois Que je suis charme de vous voir
Pray Miss cried Mr Brown wheres Miss Polly
Why Miss youve been a long while gone said Mr Branghton we thought youd been lost But what have you done with your cousins
I hesitatedfor Sir Clement regarded me with a look of wonder
Pardi cried Madame Duval I shant let you leave me again in a hurry Why here weve been in such a frightand all the while I suppose youve been thinking nothing about the matter
Well said young Branghton as long as Miss is come back I dont mind for as to Bid and Poll they can take care of themselves But the best joke is Mr Smith is gone all about a looking for you
These speeches were made almost in a breath but when at last they waited for an answer I told them that in walking up one of the long alleys we had been frightened and separated
The long alleys repeated Mr Branghton and pray what had you to do in the long alleys why to be sure you must all of you have had a mind to be affronted
This speech was not more impertinent to me than surprising to Sir
Clement who regarded all the party with evident astonishment However
I told young Branghton no time ought to be lost for that his sisters
might require his immediate protection
But how will they get it cried this brutal brother if theyve a mind to behave in such a manner as that they ought to protect themselves and so they may for me
Well said the simple Mr Brown whether you go or not I think
I may as well see after Miss Polly
The father then interfering insisted that his son should accompany him and away they went
It was now that Madame Duval first perceived Sir Clement to whom turning with a look of great displeasure she angrily said Ma foi so you are comed here of all the people in the worldI wonder child you would let such asuch a person as that keep company with you
I am very sorry Madam said Sir Clement in a tone of surprise if I had been so unfortunate as to offend you but I believe you will not regret the honour I now have of attending Miss Anville when you hear that I have been so happy as to do her some service
Just as Madame Duval with her usual Ma foi was beginning to reply the attention of Sir Clement was wholly drawn from her by the appearance of Mr Smith who coming suddenly behind me and freely putting his hands of my shoulders cried O ho my little runaway have I found you at last I have been scampering all over the gardens for you for I was determined to find you if you were above groundBut how could you be so cruel as to leave us
I turned round to him and looked with a degree of contempt that I hoped would have quieted him but he had not the sense to understand me and attempting to take my hand he added Such a demurelooking lady as you are whod have thought of your leading one such a danceCome now dont be so coy only think what a trouble I have had in running after you
The trouble Sir said I was of your own choicenot mine And
I walked round to the other side of Madame Duval
Perhaps I was too proudbut I could not endure that Sir Clement whose eyes followed him with looks of the most surprised curiosity should witness his unwelcome familiarity
Upon my removal he came up to me and in a low voice said You are not then with the Mirvans
No Sir
And praymay I ask youhave you left them long
No Sir
How unfortunate I ambut yesterday I sent to acquaint the Captain I should reach the Grove by tomorrow noon However I shall get away as fast as possible Shall you be long in town
I believe not Sir
And then when you leave itwhich waywill you allow me to ask which way you shall travel
IndeedI dont know
Not knowBut do you return to the Mirvans any more
II cant tell Sir
And then I addressed myself to Madame Duval with such a pretended earnestness that he was obliged to be silent
As he cannot but observe the great change in my situation which he knows not how to account for there is something in all these questions and this unrestrained curiosity that I did not expect from a man who when he pleases can be so wellbred as Sir Clement Willoughby He seems disposed to think that the alteration in my companions authorises an alteration in his manners It is true he has always treated me with uncommon freedom but never before with so disrespectful an abruptness This observation which he has given me cause to make of his changing with the tide has sunk him more in my opinion than any other part of his conduct
Yet I could almost have laughed when I looked at Mr Smith who no sooner saw me addressed by Sir Clement than retreating aloof from the company he seemed to lose at once all his happy selfsufficiency and conceit looking now at the baronet now at himself surveying with sorrowful eyes his dress struck with his air his gestures his easy gaiety he gazed at him with envious admiration and seemed himself with conscious inferiority to shrink into nothing
Soon after Mr Brown running up to us called out La what int Miss Polly come yet
Come said Mr Branghton why I thought you went to fetch her yourself didnt you
Yes but I couldnt find heryet I daresay Ive been over half the garden
Half but why did not you go over it all
Why so I will but only I thought Id just come and see if she was here first
But wheres Tom
Why I dont know for he would not stay with me all as ever I could say for we met some young gentlemen of his acquaintance and so he bid me go and look by myself for he said says he I can divert myself better another way says he
This account being given away again went this silly young man and Mr Branghton extremely incensed said he would go and see after them himself
So now cried Madame Duval hes gone too why at this rate we shall have to wait for one or other of them all night
Observing that Sir Clement seemed disposed to renew his enquiries I turned towards one of the paintings and pretending to be very much occupied in looking at it asked M Du Bois some questions concerning the figures
O Mon Dieu cried Madame Duval dont ask him your best way is to ask Mr Smith for hes been here the oftenest Come Mr Smith I dare say you can tell us all about them
Why yes Maam yes said Mr Smith who brightening up at this application advanced towards us with an air of assumed importance which however sat very uneasily upon him and begged to know what he should explain first For I have attended said he to all these paintings and know every thing in them perfectly well for I am rather fond of pictures Maam and really I must say I think a pretty pictures is aa veryis really a veryis something very pretty
So do I too said Madame Duval but pray now Sir tell us who that is meant for pointing to a figure of Neptune
Thatwhy that Maam isLord bless me I cant think how I come to be so stupid but really I have forgot his nameand yet I know it as well as my own toohowever hes a General Maam they are all Generals
I saw Sir Clement bite his lips and indeed so did I mine
Well said Madame Duval its the oddest dress for a general ever
I see
He seems so capital a figure said Sir Clement to Mr Smith that I imagine he must be Generalissimo of the whole army
Yes Sir yes answered Mr Smith respectfully bowing and highly delighted at being thus referred to you are perfectly rightbut I cannot for my life think of his nameperhaps Sir you may remember it
No really replied Sir Clement my acquaintance among the generals is not so extensive
The ironical tone of voice in which Sir Clement spoke entirely disconcerted Mr Smith who again retiring to an humble distance seemed sensibly mortified at the failure of his attempt to recover his consequence
Soon after Mr Branghton returned with his youngest daughter who he had rescued from a party of insolent young men but he had not yet been able to find the eldest Miss Polly was really frightened and declared she would never go into the dark walks again Her father leaving her with us went in quest of her sister
While she was relating her adventures to which nobody listened more attentively than Sir Clement we saw Mr Brown enter the room O la cried Miss Polly let me hide myself and dont tell him Im come
She then placed herself behind Madame Duval in such a manner that she could not be seen
So Miss Polly is not come yet said the simple swain well I cant think where she can be Ive been looking and looking and looking all about and cant find her all I can do
Well but Mr Brown said Mr Smith shant you go and look for the lady again
Yes Sir said he sitting down but I must rest me a little bit first You cant think how tired I am
O fie Mr Brown fie cried Mr Smith winking at us tired of looking for a lady Go go for shame
So I will Sir presently but youd be tired too if you had walked so far besides I think shes gone out of the garden or else I must have seen something or other of her
A he he he of the tittering Polly now betrayed her and so ended this ingenious little artifice
At last appeared Mr Branghton and Miss Biddy who with a face of mixed anger and confusion addressing herself to me said So Miss so you ran away from me Well see if I dont do as much by you some day or other But I thought how it would be youd no mind to leave the gentlemen though you run away from me
I was so much surprised at this attack that I could not answer her for very amazement and she proceeded to tell us how ill she had been used and that two young men had been making her walk up and down the dark walks by absolute force and as fast as ever they could tear her along and many other particulars which I will not tire you with relating In conclusion looking at Mr Smith she said But to be sure thought I at least all the company will be looking for me so I little expected to find you all here talking as comfortably as ever you can However I know I may thank my cousin for it
If you mean me Madam said I very much shocked I am quite ignorant in what manner I can have been accessary to your distress
Why by running away so If youd stayed with us Ill answer for it Mr Smith and M Du Bois would have come to look for us but I suppose they could not leave your ladyship
The folly and unreasonableness of this speech would admit of no answer But what a scene was this for Sir Clement his surprise was evident and I must acknowledge my confusion was equally great
We had now to wait for young Branghton who did not appear for some time and during this interval it was with difficulty that I avoided Sir Clement who was on the rack of curiosity and dying to speak to me
When at last the hopeful youth returned a long and frightful quarrel ensued between him and his father in which his sisters occasionally joined concerning his neglect and he defended himself only by a brutal mirth which he indulged at their expense
Every one now seemed inclined to departwhen as usual a dispute arose upon the way of our going whether in a coach or a boat After much debating it was determined that we should make two parties one by the water and the other by land for Madame Duval declared she would not upon any account go into a boat at night
Sir Clement then said that if she had no carriage in waiting he should be happy to see her and me safe home as his was in readiness
Fury started into her eyes and passion inflamed every feature as she answered Pardi noyou may take care of yourself if you please but as to me I promise you I shant trust myself with no such person
He pretended not to comprehend her meaning yet to waive a discussion acquiesced in her refusal The coachparty fixed upon consisted of Madame Duval M Du Bois Miss Branghton and myself
I now began to rejoice in private that at least our lodgings would be neither seen nor known by Sir Clement We soon met with a hackneycoach into which he handed me and then took leave
Madame Duval having already given the coachman her direction he mounted the box and we were just driving off when Sir Clement exclaimed By Heaven this is the very coach I had in waiting for myself
This coach your honour said the man no that it int
Sir Clement however swore that it was and presently the man begging his pardon said he had really forgotten that he was engaged
I have no doubt but that this scheme occurred to him at the moment and that he made some sign to the coachman which induced him to support it for there is not the least probability that the accident really happened as it is most likely his own chariot was in waiting
The man then opened the coachdoor and Sir Clement advancing to it said I dont believe there is another carriage to be had or I would not incommode you but as it may be disagreeable to you to wait here any longer I beg you will not get out for you shall be set down before I am carried home if you will be so good as to make a little room
And so saying in he jumped and seated himself between M Du Bois and me while our astonishment at the whole transaction was too great for speech He then ordered the coachman to drive on according to the directions he had already received
For the first ten minutes no one uttered a word and then Madame Duval no longer able to contain herself exclaimed Ma foi if this isnt one of the most impudentest things ever I see
Sir Clement regardless of this rebuke attended only to me however I answered nothing he said when I could possibly avoid so doing Miss Branghton made several attempts to attract his notice but in vain for he would not take the trouble of paying her any regard
Madame Duval during the rest of the ride addressed herself to M Du Bois in French and in that language exclaimed with great vehemence against boldness and assurance
I was extremely glad when I thought our journey must be nearly at an end for my situation was very uneasy to me as Sir Clement perpetually endeavoured to take my hand I looked out of the coachwindow to see if we were near home Sir Clement stooping over me did the same and then in a voice of infinite wonder called out Where the dl is the man driving toWhy we are in Broad Street St Giless
O hes very right cried Madame Duval so never trouble your head about that for I shant go by no directions of yours I promise you
When at last we stopped at an hosiers in High HolbornSir Clement said nothing but his eyes I saw were very busily employed in viewing the place and the situation of the house The coach he said belong to him and therefore he insisted upon paying for it and then he took leave M Du Bois walked home with Miss Branghton and Madame Duval and I retired to our apartments
How disagreeable an evenings adventure not one of the party seemed satisfied except Sir Clement who was in high spirits but Madame Duval was enraged at meeting with him Mr Branghton angry with his children the frolic of the Miss Branghtons had exceeded their plan and ended in their own distress their brother was provoked that there had been no riot Mr Brown was tired and Mr Smith mortified As to myself I must acknowledge nothing could be more disagreeable to me than being seen by Sir Clement Willoughby with a party at once so vulgar in themselves and so familiar to me
And you too my dear Sir will I know be sorry that I have met him however there is no apprehension of his visiting here as Madame Duval is far too angry to admit him
LETTER XLVII
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Holborn June 18th
MADAME DUVAL rose very late this morning and at one oclock we had but just breakfasted when Miss Branghton her brother Mr Smith and Monsieur Du Bois called to enquire after our healths
The civility in young Branghton I much suspect was merely the result of his fathers commands but his sister and Mr Smith I soon found had motives of their own Scarce had they spoken to Madame Duval when advancing eagerly to me Pray Maam said Mr Smith who was that gentleman
Pray cousin cried Miss Branghton was not he the same gentleman you ran away with that night at the opera
Goodness that he was said young Branghton and I declare as soon as ever I saw him I thought I knew his face
Im sure Ill defy you to forget him answered his sister if once you had seen him he is the finest gentleman I ever saw in my life dont you think so Mr Smith
Why you wont give the lady time to speak said Mr SmithPray
Maam what is the gentlemans name
Willoughby Sir
Willoughby I think I have heard the name Pray Maam is he married
Lord no that he is not cried Miss Branghton he looks too smart by a great deal for a married man Pray cousin how did you get acquainted with him
Pray Miss said young Branghton in the same breath whats his business
Indeed I dont know answered I
Something very genteel I dare say added Miss Branghton because he dresses so fine
It ought to be something that brings in a good income said Mr Smith for Im sure that he did not get that suit of clothes he had on under thirty or forty pounds for I know the price of clothes pretty wellPray Maam can you tell me what he has ayear
Dont talk no more about him cried Madame Duval for I dont like to hear his name I believe hes one of the worst persons in the world for though I never did him no manner of harm nor so much as hurt a hair of his head I know he was an accomplice with the fellow Captain Mirvan to take away my life
Everybody but myself now crowding around her for an explanation a violent rapping at the streetdoor was unheard and without any previous notice in the midst of her narration Sir Clement Willoughby entered the room They all started and with looks of guilty confusion as if they feared his resentment for having listened to Madame Duval they scrambled for chairs and in a moment were all formally seated
Sir Clement after a general bow singling out Madame Duval said with his usual easiness I have done myself the honour of waiting on you Madame to enquire if you have any commands to Howard Grove whither I am going tomorrow morning
Then seeing the storm that gathered in her eyes before he allowed her time to answer he addressed himself to meAnd if you Madam have any with which you will honour me I shall be happy to execute them
None at all Sir
None not to Miss Mirvanno message no letter
I wrote to Miss Mirvan yesterday by the post
My application should have been earlier had I sooner known your address
Ma foi cried Madame Duval recovering from her surprise I believe never nobody saw the like of this
Of what Madam cried the undaunted Sir Clement turning quick towards her I hope no one has offended you
You dont hope no such a thing cried she half choked with passion and rising from her chair This motion was followed by the rest and in a moment every body stood up
Still Sir Clement was not abashed affecting to make a bow of acknowledgment to the company in general he said PrayI begLadiesGentlemenpray dont let me disturb you pray keep your seats
Pray Sir said Miss Branghton moving a chair towards him wont you sit down yourself
You are extremely good Maamrather than make any disturbance
And so saying this strange man seated himself as did in an instant every body else even Madame Duval herself who overpowered by his boldness seemed too full for utterance
He then and with as much composure as if he had been an expected guest began to discourse on the weatherits uncertaintythe heat of the public places in summerthe emptiness of the townand other such common topics
Nobody however answered him Mr Smith seemed afraid young Branghton ashamed M Du Bois amazed Madame Duval enraged and myself determined not to interfere All that he could obtain was the notice of Miss Branghton whose nods smiles and attention had some appearance of entering into conversation with him
At length growing tired I suppose of engaging every bodys eyes and nobodys tongue addressing himself to Madame Duval and to me the said I regard myself as peculiarly unfortunate Ladies in having fixed upon a time for my visit to Howard Grove when you are absent from it
So I suppose Sir so I suppose cried Madame Duval hastily rising and the next moment as hastily seating herselfyoull be wanting of somebody to make your game of and so you may think to get me there againbut I promise you Sir you wont find it so easy a matter to make me a fool and besides that raising her voice Ive found you out I assure you so if ever you go to play your tricks upon me again Ill make no more ado but go directly to a justice of peace so Sir if you cant think of nothing but making people ride about the country at all hours of the night just for your diversion why youll find I know some justices as well as Justice Tyrrell
Sir Clement was evidently embarrassed at this attack yet he affected a look of surprise and protested he did not understand her meaning
Well cried she if I dont wonder where people can get such impudence if youll say that youll say anything however if you swear till youre black in the face I shant believe you for nobody shant persuade me out of my senses that Im resolved
Doubtless not Madam answered he with some hesitation and I hope you do not suspect I ever had such an intention my respect for you
O Sir youre vastly polite all of a sudden but I know what its all for its only for what you can getYou could treat me like nobody at Howard Grove but now you see Ive a house of my own youre mind to wheedle yourself into it but I sees your design so you neednt trouble yourself to take no more trouble about that for you shall never get nothing at my housenot so much as a dish of teaso now Sir you see I can play you trick for trick
There was something so extremely gross in this speech that it even disconcerted Sir Clement who was too much confounded to make any answer
It was curious to observe the effect which his embarrassment added to the freedom with which Madame Duval addressed him had upon the rest of the company Every one who before seemed at a loss how or if at all to occupy a chair how filled it with the most easy composure and Mr Smith whose countenance had exhibited the most striking picture of mortified envy now began to recover his usual expression of satisfied conceit Young Branghton too who had been apparently awed by the presence of so fine a gentleman was again himself rude and familiar while his mouth was wide distended into a broad grin at hearing his aunt give the beau such a trimming
Madame Duval encouraged by this success looked around her with an air of triumph and continued her harangue And so Sir I suppose you thought to have had it all your own way and to have comed here as often as you pleased and to have got me to Howard Grove again on purpose to have served me as you did before but you shall see Im as cunning as you so you may go and find somebody else to use in that manner and to put your mask on and to make a fool of for as to me if you go to tell me your stories about the Tower again for a month together Ill never believe m no more and Ill promise you Sir if you think I like such jokes youll find Im no such person
I assure you Maamupon my honourI really dont comprehendI fancy there is some misunderstanding
What I suppose youll tell me next you dont know nothing of the matter
Not a word upon my honour
O Sir Clement thought I is it thus you prize your honour
Pardi cried Madame Duval this is the most provokingest part of all why you might as well tell me I dont know my own name
Here is certainly some mistake for I assure you Maam
Dont assure me nothing cried Madame Duval raising her voice I know what Im saying and so do you too for did not you tell me all that about the Tower and about M Du Boiswhy M Du Bois wasnt never there nor nigh it and so it was all your own invention
May there not be two persons of the same name the mistake was but natural
Dont tell me of no mistake for it was all on purpose besides did not you come all in a mask to the chariotdoor and help to get me put in that ditchIll promise you Ive had the greatest mind in the world to take the law of you ever since and if ever you do as much again so I will I assure you
Here Miss Branghton tittered Mr Smith smiled contemptously and young
Branghton thrust his handkerchief into his mouth to stop his laughter
The situation of Sir Clement who saw all that passed became now very awkward even to himself and he stammered very much in saying Surely Madamsurely youyou cannot do me thethe injustice to thinkthat I had any share in thethethe misfortune which
Ma foi Sir cried Madame Duval with increasing passion youd best not stand talking to me at that rate I know it was you and if you stay there a provoking me in such a manner Ill send for a constable this minute
Young Branghton at these words in spite of all his efforts burst into a loud laugh nor could either his sister or Mr Smith though with more moderation forbear joining in his mirth
Sir Clement darted his eyes towards them with looks of the most angry contempt and then told Madame Duval that he would not now detain her to make his vindication but would wait on her some time when she was alone
O Pardi Sir cried she I dont desire none of your company and if you wasnt the most boldest person in the world you would not dare look me in the face
The ha ha has and he he hes grew more and more uncontrollable as if the restraint from which they had burst had added to their violence Sir Clement could no longer endure being the object who excited them and having no answer ready for Madame Duval he hastily stalked towards Mr Smith and young Branghton and sternly demanded what they laughed at
Struck by the air of importance which he assumed and alarmed at the angry tone of his voice their merriment ceased as instantaneously as if it had been directed by clockwork and they stared foolishly now at him now at each other without making any answer but a simple Nothing Sir
O pour le coup cried Madame Duval this is too much Pray Sir what business have you to come here a ordering people that comes to see me I suppose next nobody must laugh but yourself
With me Madam said Sir Clement bowing a lady may do any thing and consequently there is no liberty in which I shall not be happy to indulge you but it has never been my custom to give the same licence to gentlemen
Then advancing to me who had sat very quietly on a window during this scene he said Miss Anville I may at least acquaint our friends at Howard Grove that I had the honour of leaving you in good health And then lowering his voice he added For Heavens sake my dearest creature who are these people and how came you so strangely situated
I beg my respects to all the family Sir answered I aloud and I hope you will find them well
He looked at me reproachfully but kissed my hand and then bowing to Madame Duval and Miss Branghton passed hastily by the men and made his exit
I fancy he will not be very eager to repeat his visit for I should imagine he has rarely if ever been before in a situation so awkward and disagreeable
Madame Duval has been all spirits and exultation ever since he went and only wishes Captain Mirvan would call that she might do the same by him Mr Smith upon hearing that he was a baronet and seeing him drive off in a very beautiful chariot declared that he would not have laughed upon any account had he known his rank and regretted extremely having missed such an opportunity of making so genteel an acquaintance Young Branghton vowed that if he had known as much he would have asked for his custom and his sister has sung his praises ever since protesting she thought all along he was a man of quality by his look
LETTER XLVIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION June 21st
THE last three evenings have passed tolerably quiet for the Vauxhall adventures had given Madame Duval a surfeit of public places home however soon growing tiresome she determined tonight she said to relieve her ennui by some amusement and it was therefore settled that we should call upon the Branghtons at their house and thence proceed to Marybone Gardens
But before we reached Snow Hill we were caught in a shower of rain we hurried into the shop where the first object I saw was Mr Macartney with a book in his hand seated in the same corner where I saw him last but his looks were still more wretched than before his face yet thinner and his eyes sunk almost hollow into his head He lifted them up as we entered and I even thought that they emitted a gleam of joy involuntarily I made to him my first courtesy he rose and bowed with a precipitation that manifested surprise and confusion
In a few minutes were joined by all the family except Mr Smith who fortunately was engaged
Had all the future prosperity of our lives depended upon the good or bad weather of this evening it could not have been treated as a subject of greater importance Sure never anything was so unluckyLord how provokingIt might rain for ever if it would hold up nowThese and such expressions with many anxious observations upon the kennels filled up all the conversation till the shower was over
And then a very warm debate arose whether we should pursue our plan or defer it to some finer evening The Miss Branghtons were for the former their father was sure it would rain again Madame Duval though she detested returning home yet dreaded the dampness of the gardens
M Du Bois then proposed going to the top of the house to examine whether the clouds looked threatening or peaceable Miss Branghton starting at this proposal said they might go to Mr Macartneys room if they would but not to hers
This was enough for the brother who with a loud laugh declared he would have some fun and immediately led the way calling to us all to follow His sisters both ran after but no one else moved
In a few minutes young Branghton coming halfway down stairs called out Lord why dont you all come why heres Polls things all about the room
Mr Branghton then went and Madame Duval who cannot bear to be excluded from whatever is going forward was handed up stairs by M Du Bois
I hesitated a few moments whether or not to join them but soon perceiving that Mr Macartney had dropped his book and that I engrossed his whole attention I prepared from mere embarrassment to follow them
As I went I heard him move from his chair and walk slowly after me Believing that he wished to speak to me and earnestly desiring myself to know if by your means I could possibly be of any service to him I first slackened my pace and then turned back But though I thus met him halfway he seemed to want courage or resolution to address me for when he saw me returning with a look extremely disordered he retreated hastily from me
Not knowing what I ought to do I went to the streetdoor where I stood some time hoping he would be able to recover himself but on the contrary his agitation increased every moment he walked up and down the room in a quick but unsteady pace seeming equally distressed and irresolute and at length with a deep sigh he flung himself into a chair
I was so much affected by the appearance of such extreme anguish that I could remain no longer in the room I therefore glided by him and went up stairs but ere I had gone five steps he precipitately followed me and in a broken voice called out Madamfor Heavens sake
He stopped but I instantly descended restraining as well as I was able the fulness of my own concern I waited some time in painful expectation for his speaking all that I had heard of his poverty occurring to me I was upon the point of presenting him my purse but the fear of mistaking or offending him deterred me Finding however that he continued silent I ventured to say Did youSir wish to speak to me
I did cried he with quickness but nowI cannot
Perhaps Sir another timeperhaps if you recollect yourself
Another time repeated he mournfully alas I look not forward but to misery and despair
O Sir cried I extremely shocked you must not talk thusIf you forsake yourself how can you expect
I stopped Tell me tell me cried he with eagerness who you arewhence you comeand by what strange means you seem to be arbitress and ruler of the destiny of such a wretch as I am
Would to Heaven cried I I could serve you
You can
And how Pray tell me how
To tell youis death to me yet I will tell youI have a right to your assistanceyou have deprived me of the only resource to which I could applyand therefore
Pray pray speak cried I putting my hand into my pocket they will be down stairs in a moment
I will MadamCan youwill youI think you willmay I then he stopped and paused say will youthen suddenly turning from me Great Heaven I cannot speak and he went back to the shop
I now put my purse in my hand and following him said If indeed Sir I can assist you why should you deny me so great a satisfaction Will you permit me to
I dared not go on but with a countenance very much softened he approached me and said Your voice Madam is the voice of compassionsuch a voice as these ears have long been strangers to
Just then young Branghton called out vehemently to me to come up stairs I seized the opportunity of hastening away and therefore saying Heaven Sir protect and comfort you I let fall my purse upon the ground not daring to present it to him and ran up stairs with the utmost swiftness
Too well do I know you my ever honoured Sir to fear your displeasure for this action I must however assure you I shall need no fresh supply during my stay in town as I am at little expense and hope soon to return to Howard Grove
Soon did I say when not a fortnight is yet expired of the long and tedious month I must linger out here
I had many witticisms to endure from the Branghtons upon account of my staying so long with the Scotch mope as they call him but I attended to them very little for my whole heart was filled with pity and concern I was very glad to find the Marybone scheme was deferred another shower of rain having put a stop to the dissension upon this subject the rest of the evening was employed in most violent quarrelling between Miss Polly and her brother on account of the discovery made by the latter of the state of her apartment
We came home early and I have stolen from Madame Duval and M Du Bois who is here for ever to write to my best friend
I am most sincerely rejoiced that this opportunity has offered for my contributing what little relief was in my power to this unhappy man and I hope it will be sufficient to enable him to pay his debts to this pitiless family
LETTER XLIX
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill
DISPLEASURE my Evelinayou have but done your duty you have but shown that humanity without which I should blush to own my child It is mine however to see that your generosity be not repressed by your suffering from indulging it I remit to you therefore not merely a token of my approbation but an acknowledgment of my desire to participate in your charity
O my child were my fortune equal to my confidence in thy benevolence with what transport should I through thy means devote it to the relief of indigent virtue yet let us not repine at the limitation of our power for while our bounty is proportioned to our ability the difference of the greater or less donation can weigh but little in the scale of justice
In reading your account of the misguided man whose misery has so largely excited your compassion I am led to apprehend that his unhappy situation is less the effect of misfortune than of misconduct If he is reduced to that state of poverty represented by the Branghtons he should endeavour by activity and industry to retrieve his affairs and not pass his time in idle reading in the very shop of his creditor
The pistol scene made me shudder the courage with which you pursued this desperate man at once delighted and terrified me Be ever thus my dearest Evelina dauntless in the cause of distress let no weak fears no timid doubts deter you from the exertion of your duty according to the fullest sense of it that Nature has implanted in your mind Though gentleness and modesty are the peculiar attributes of your sex yet fortitude and firmness when occasion demands them are virtues as noble and as becoming in women as in men the right line of conduct is the same for both sexes though the manner in which it is pursued may somewhat vary and be accommodated to the strength or weakness of the different travellers
There is however something so mysterious in all you have seen or heard of this wretched man that I am unwilling to stamp a bad impression of his character upon so slight and partial a knowledge of it Where any thing is doubtful the ties of society and the laws of humanity claim a favourable interpretation but remember my dear child that those of discretion have an equal claim to your regard
As to Sir Clement Willoughby I know not how to express my indignation at his conduct Insolence so insufferable and the implication of suspicions so shocking irritate me to a degree of wrath which I hardly thought my almost wornout passions were capable of again experiencing You must converse with him no more he imagines from the pliability of your temper that he may offend you with impunity but his behaviour justifies nay calls for your avowed resentment do not therefore hesitate in forbidding him your sight
The Branghtons Mr Smith and young Brown however illbred and disagreeable are objects too contemptible for serious displeasure yet I grieve much that my Evelina should be exposed to their rudeness and impertinence
The very day that this tedious month expires I shall send Mrs Clinton to town who will accompany you to Howard Grove Your stay there will I hope be short for I feel daily an increasing impatience to fold my beloved child to my bosom ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER L
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Holborn June 27th
I HAVE just received my dearest Sir your kind present and still kinder letter Surely never had orphan so little to regret as your grateful Evelina Though motherless though worse than fatherless bereft from infancy of the two first and greatest blessings of life never has she had cause to deplore their loss never has she felt the omission of a parents tenderness care or indulgence never but from sorrow for them had reason to grieve at the separation Most thankfully do I receive the token of your approbation and most studiously will I endeavour so to dispose of it as may merit your generous confidence in my conduct
Your doubts concerning Mr Macartney give me some uneasiness Indeed Sir he has not the appearance of a man whose sorrows are the effect of guilt But I hope before I leave town to be better acquainted with his situation and enabled with more certainty of his worth to recommend him to your favour
I am very willing to relinquish all acquaintance with Sir Clement
Willoughby as far as it may depend upon myself so to do but indeed
I know not how I should be able to absolutely forbid him my sight
Miss Mirvan in her last letter informs me that he is now at Howard Grove where he continues in high favour with the Captain and is the life and spirit of the house My time since I wrote last has passed very quietly Madame Duval having been kept at home by a bad cold and the Branghtons by bad weather The young man indeed has called two or three times and his behavior though equally absurd is more unaccountable than ever he speaks very little takes hardly any notice of Madame Duval and never looks at me without a broad grin Sometimes he approaches me as if with intention to communicate intelligence of importance and then suddenly stopping short laughs rudely in my face
O how happy shall I be when the worthy Mrs Clinton arrives
June 29th
Yesterday morning Mr Smith called to acquaint us that the Hampstead assembly was to be held that evening and then he presented Madame Duval with one ticket and brought another to me I thanked him for his intended civility but told him I was surprised he had so soon forgotten my having already declined going to the ball
Lord Maam cried he how should I suppose you was in earnest come come dont be cross heres your Grandmama ready to take care of you so you can have no fair objection for shell see that I dont run away with you Besides Maam I got the tickets on purpose
If you were determined Sir said I in making me this offer to allow me no choice of refusal or acceptance I must think myself less obliged to your intention than I was willing to do
Dear Maam cried he youre so smart there is no speaking to youindeed you are monstrous smart Maam but come your Grandmama shall ask you and then I know youll not be so cruel
Madame Duval was very ready to interfere she desired me to make no further opposition said she should go herself and insisted upon my accompanying her It was in vain that I remonstrated I only incurred her anger and Mr Smith having given both the tickets to Madame Duval with an air of triumph said he should call early in the evening and took leave
I was much chagrined at being thus compelled to owe even the shadow of an obligation to so forward a young man but I determined that nothing should prevail upon me to dance with him however my refusal might give offence
In the afternoon when he returned it was evident that he purposed to both charm and astonish me by his appearance he was dressed in a very showy manner but without any taste and the inelegant smartness of his air and deportment his visible struggle against education to put on the fine gentleman added to his frequent conscious glances at a dress to which he was but little accustomed very effectually destroyed his aim of figuring and rendered all his efforts useless
During tea entered Miss Branghton and her brother I was sorry to observe the consternation of the former when she perceived Mr Smith I had intended applying to her for advice upon this occasion but had been always deterred by her disagreeable abruptness Having cast her eyes several times from Mr Smith to me with manifest displeasure she seated herself sullenly in the window scarce answering Madame Duvals enquiries and when I spoke to her turning absolutely away from me
Mr Smith delighted at this mark of his importance sat indolently quiet on his chair endeavouring by his looks rather to display than to conceal his inward satisfaction
Good gracious cried young Branghton why youre all as fine as a fivepence Why where are you going
To the Hampstead ball answered Mr Smith
To a ball cried he Why what is aunt going to a ball Ha ha ha
Yes to be sure cried Madame Duval I dont know nothing need hinder me
And pray aunt will you dance too
Perhaps I may but I suppose Sir thats none of your business whether I do or not
Lord well I should like to go I should like to see aunt dance of all things But the joke is I dont believe shell get ever a partner
Youre the most rudest boy ever I see cried Madame Duval angrily but I promise you Ill tell your father what you say for Ive no notion of such vulgarness
Why Lord aunt what are you so angry for theres no speaking a word but you fly into a passion youre as bad as Biddy or Poll for that for youre always ascolding
I desire Tom cried Miss Branghton youd speak for yourself and not make so free with my name
There now shes up Theres nothing but quarrelling with the women its my belief they like it better than victuals and drink
Fie Tom cried Mr Smith you never remember your manners before the ladies Im sure you never heard me speak so rude to them
Why Lord you are a beau but thats nothing to me So if youve a mind you may be so polite as to dance with aunt yourself Then with a loud laugh he declared it would be good fun to see them
Let it be never so good or never so bad cried Madame Duval you wont see nothing of it I promise you so pray dont let me hear no more of such vulgar pieces of fun for I assure you I dont like it And as to my dancing with Mr Smith you may see wonderfuller things than that any day in the week
Why as to that Maam said Mr Smith looking much surprised I always thought you intended to play at cards and so I thought to dance with the young lady
I gladly seized this opportunity to make my declaration that I should not dance at all
Not dance at all repeated Miss Branghton yes thats a likely matter truly when people go to balls
I wish she maynt said the brother cause then Mr Smith will have nobody but aunt for a partner Lord how mad hell be
O as to that said Mr Smith I dont at all fear of prevailing with the young lady if once I get her to the room
Indeed Sir cried I much offended by his conceit you are mistaken and therefore I beg leave to undeceive you as you may be assured my resolution will not alter
Then pray Miss if it is not impertinent cried Miss Branghton sneeringly what do you go for
Merely and solely answered I to comply with the request of
Madame Duval
Miss cried young Branghton Bid only wishes it was she for she has cast a sheeps eye at Mr Smith this long while
Tom cried the sister rising Ive the greatest mind in the world to box your ears How dare you say such a thing of me
No hang it Tom no thats wrong said Mr Smith simpering it is indeed to tell the ladys secretsBut never mind him Miss Biddy for I wont believe him
Why I know Bid would give her ears to go returned the brother but only Mr Smith likes Miss bestso does every body else
While the sister gave him a very angry answer Mr Smith said to me in a low voice Why now Maam how can you be so cruel as to be so much handsomer than your cousins Nobody can look at them when you are by
Miss cried young Branghton whatever he says to you dont mind him for he means no good Ill give you my word for it hell never marry you for he has told me again and again hell never marry as long as he lives besides if hed any mind to be married theres Bid would have had him long ago and thanked him too
Come come Tom dont tell secrets youll make the ladies afraid of me but I assure you lowering his voice if I did marry it should be your cousin
Should bedid you ever my dear Sir hear such unauthorised freedom I looked at him with a contempt I did not wish to repress and walked to the other end of the room
Very soon after Mr Smith sent for a hackneycoach When I would have taken leave of Miss Branghton she turned angrily from me without making any answer She supposes perhaps that I have rather sought than endeavoured to avoid the notice and civilities of this conceited young man
The ball was at the long room at Hampstead
This room seems very well named for I believe it would be difficult to find any other epithet which might with propriety distinguish it as it is without ornament elegance or any sort of singularity and merely to be marked by its length
I was saved from the importunities of Mr Smith the beginning of the evening by Madame Duvals declaring her intention to dance the first two dances with him herself Mr Smiths chagrin was very evident but as she paid no regard to it he was necessitated to lead her out
I was however by no means pleased when she said she was determined to dance a minuet Indeed I was quite astonished not having had the least idea she would have consented to much less proposed such an exhibition of her person She had some trouble to make her intentions known as Mr Smith was rather averse to speaking to the master of the ceremonies
During this minuet how much did I rejoice in being surrounded only with strangers She danced in a style so uncommon her age her showy dress and an unusual quantity of rouge drew upon her the eyes and I fear the derision of the whole company Whom she danced with I know not but Mr Smith was so illbred as to laugh at her very openly and to speak of her with as much ridicule as was in his power But I would neither look at nor listen to him nor would I suffer him to proceed with any speech which he began expressive to his vexation at being forced to dance with her I told him very gravely that complaints upon such a subject might with less impropriety be made to every person in the room than to me
When she returned to us she distressed me very much by asking what I thought of her minuet I spoke as civilly as I could but the coldness of my compliment evidently disappointed her She then called upon Mr Smith to secure a good place among the country dancers and away they went though not before he had taken the liberty to say to me in a low voice I protest to you Maam I shall be quite out of countenance if any of my acquaintance should see me dancing with the old lady
For a few moments I very much rejoiced at being relieved from this troublesome man but scarce had I time to congratulate myself before I was accosted by another who begged the favour of hopping a dance with me
I told him that I should not dance at all but he thought proper to importune me very freely not to be so cruel and I was obliged to assume no little haughtiness before I could satisfy him I was serious
After this I was addressed much in the same manner by several other young men of whom the appearance and language were equally inelegant and lowbred so that I soon found my situation was both disagreeable and improper since as I was quite alone I fear I must seem rather to invite than to forbid the offers and notice I received and yet so great was my apprehension of this interpretation that I am sure my dear Sir you would have laughed had you seen how proudly grave I appeared
I knew not whether to be glad or sorry when Madame Duval and Mr Smith returned The latter instantly renewed his tiresome intreaties and Madame Duval said she would go to the cardtable and as soon as she was accommodated she desired us to join the dancers
I will not trouble you with the arguments which followed Mr Smith teased me till I was weary of resistance and I should at last have been obliged to submit had I not fortunately recollected the affair of Mr Lovel and told my persecutor that it was impossible I should dance with him even if I wished it as I had refused several persons in his absence
He was not contented with being extremely chagrined but took the liberty openly and warmly to expostulate with me upon not having said I was engaged
The total disregard with which involuntarily I heard him made him soon change the subject In truth I had no power to attend to him for all my thoughts were occupied in retracing the transactions of the two former balls at which I had been present The partythe conversationthe companyO how great the contrast
In a short time however he contrived to draw my attention to himself by his extreme impertinence for he chose to express what he called his admiration of me in terms so open and familiar that he forced me to express my displeasure with equal plainness
But how was I surprised when I found he had the temeritywhat else can I call itto impute my resentment to doubts of his honour for he said My dear Maam you must be a little patient I assure you I have no bad designs I have not upon my word but really there is no resolving upon such a thing as matrimony all at once what with the loss of ones liberty and what with the ridicule of all ones acquaintanceI assure you Maam you are the first lady who ever made me even demur upon this subject for after all my dear Maam marriage is the devil
Your opinion Sir answered I of either the married or the single life can be of no manner of consequence to me and therefore I would by no means trouble you to discuss their different merits
Why really Maam as to your being a little out of sorts I must own I cant wonder at it for to be sure marriage is all in all with the ladies but with us gentlemen its quite another thing Now only put yourself in my placesuppose you had such a large acquaintance of gentlemen as I haveand that you had always been used to appear a littlea little smart among themwhy now could you like to let your self down all at once into a married man
I could not tell what to answer so much conceit and so much ignorance both astonished and silenced me
I assure you Maam added he there is not only Miss Biddythough I should have scored to mention her if her brother had not blabd for Im quite particular in keeping ladies secretsbut there are a great many other ladies that have been proposed to mebut I never thought twice of any of them that is not in a serious wayso you may very well be proud offering to take my hand for I assure you there is nobody so likely to catch me at last as yourself
Sir cried I drawing myself back as haughtily as I could you are totally mistaken if you imagine you have given me any pride I felt not before by this conversation on the contrary you must allow me to tell you I find it too humiliating to bear with it any longer
I then placed myself behind the chair of Madame Duval who when she heard of the partners I had refused pitied my ignorance of the world but no longer insisted upon my dancing
Indeed the extreme vanity of this man makes me exert a spirit which I did not till now know that I possessed but I cannot endure that he should think me at his disposal
The rest of the evening passed very quietly as Mr Smith did not again attempt speaking to me except indeed after we had left the room and while Madam Duval was seating herself in the coach he said in a voice of pique Next time I take the trouble to get any tickets for a young lady Ill make a bargain beforehand that she shant turn me over to her grandmother
We came home very safe and thus ended this so long projected and most disagreeable affair
LETTER LI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION
I HAVE just received a most affecting letter from Mr Macartney I
will inclose it my dear Sir for your perusal More than ever have
I cause to rejoice that I was able to assist him Mr Macartney to
Miss Anville
Madam
IMPRESSED with deepest the most heartfelt sense of the exalted humanity with which you have rescued from destruction an unhappy stranger allow me with humblest gratitude to offer you my fervent acknowledgments and to implore your pardon for the terror I have caused you
You bid me Madam live I have now indeed a motive for life since I should not willingly quit the world while I withhold from the needy and distressed any share of that charity which a disposition so noble would otherwise bestow upon them
The benevolence with which you have interested yourself in my affairs induces me to suppose you would wish to be acquainted with the cause of that desperation from which you snatched me and the particulars of that misery of which you have so wonderfully been a witness Yet as this explanation will require that I should divulge secrets of a nature the most delicate I must intreat you to regard them as sacred even though I forbear to mention the names of the parties concerned
I was brought up in Scotland though my mother who had the sole care of me was an Englishwoman and had not one relation in that country She devoted to me her whole time The retirement in which we lived and the distance from our natural friends she often told me were the effect of an unconquerable melancholy with which she was seized upon the sudden loss of my father some time before I was born
At Aberdeen where I finished my education I formed a friendship with a young man of fortune which I considered as the chief happiness of my lifebut when he quitted his studies I considered it as my chief misfortune for he immediately prepared by direction of his friends to make the tour of Europe As I was designed for the church and had no prospect even of maintenance but from my own industry I scarce dared permit even a wish of accompanying him It is true he would joyfully have borne my expenses but my affection was as free from meanness as his own and I made a determination the most solemn never to lessen its dignity by submitting to pecuniary obligations
We corresponded with great regularity and the most unbounded confidence for the space of two years when he arrived at Lyons in his way home
He wrote me thence the most pressing invitation to meet him at Paris where he intended to remain some time My desire to comply with his request and shorten our absence was so earnest that my mother too indulgent to control me lent me what assistance was in her power and in an illfated moment I set out for that capital
My meeting with this dear friend was the happiest event of my life he introduced me to all his acquaintance and so quickly did time seem to pass at that delightful period that the six weeks I had allotted for my stay were gone ere I was sensible I had missed so many days But I must now own that the company of my friend was not the sole subject of my felicity I became acquainted with a young lady daughter of an Englishman of distinction with whom I formed an attachment which I have a thousand times vowed a thousand times sincerely thought would be lasting as my life She had but just quitted a convent in which she had been placed when a child and though English by birth she could scarcely speak her native language Her person and disposition were equally engaging but chiefly I adored her for the greatness of the expectation which for my sake she was willing to resign
When the time for my residence in Paris expired I was almost distracted at the idea of quitting her yet I had not the courage to make our attachment known to her father who might reasonably form for her such views as would make him reflect with a contempt which I could not bear to think of such an offer as mine Yet I had free access to the house where she seemed to be left almost wholly to the guidance of an old servant who was my fast friend
But to be brief the sudden and unexpected return of her father one fatal afternoon proved the beginning of the misery which has ever since devoured me I doubt not but he had listened to our conversation for he darted into the room with the rage of a madman Heavens what a scene followedwhat abusive language did the shame of a clandestine affair and the consciousness of acting ill induce me to brook At length however his fury exceeded my patience he called me a beggarly cowardly Scotchman Fired at the words I drew my sword he with equal alertness drew his for he was not an old man but on the contrary strong and able as myself In vain his daughter pleadedin vain did I repentant of my anger retreathis reproaches continued myself my country were loaded with infamy till no longer constraining my ragewe foughtand he fell
At that moment I could almost have destroyed myself The young lady fainted with terror the old servant drawn to us by the noise of the scuffle entreated me to escape and promised to bring intelligence of what should pass to my apartments The disturbance which I heard raised in the house obliged me to comply and in a state of mind inconceivable wretched I tore myself away
My friend whom I found at home soon discovered the whole affair It was near midnight before the woman came She told me that her master was living and her young mistress restored to her senses The absolute necessity for my leaving Paris while any danger remained was forcibly argued by my friend the servant promised to acquaint him of whatever passed and he to transmit to me her information Thus circumstanced with the assistance of this dear friend I effected my departure from Paris and not long after I returned to Scotland I would fain have stopped by the way that I might have been nearer the scene of all my concerns but the low state of my finances denied me that satisfaction
The miserable situation of my mind was soon discovered by my mother nor would she rest till I communicated the cause She heard my whole story with an agitation which astonished methe name of the parties concerned seemed to strike her with horrorbut when I said We fought and he fell My son cried she you have then murdered your father and she sunk breathless at my feet Comments Madam upon such a scene as this would to you be superfluous and to me agonizing I cannot for both our sakes be too concise When she recovered she confessed all the particulars of a tale which she had hoped never to have revealedAlas the loss she had sustained of my father was not by deathbound to her by no ties but those of honour he had voluntarily deserted herHer settling in Scotland was not the effect of choiceshe was banished thither by a family but too justly incensedPardon Madam that I cannot be more explicit
My senses in the greatness of my misery actually forsook me and for more than a week I was wholly delirious My unfortunate mother was yet more to pitied for she pined with unmitigated sorrow eternally reproaching herself for the danger to which her too strict silence had exposed me When I recovered my reason my impatience to hear from Paris almost deprived me of it again and though the length of time I waited for letters might justly be attributed to contrary winds I could not bear the delay and was twenty times upon the point of returning thither at all hazards At length however several letters arrived at once and from the most insupportable of my afflictions I was then relieved for they acquainted me that the horrors of parricide were not in reserve for me They informed me also that as soon as the wound was healed a journey would be made to England where my unhappy sister was to be received by an aunt with whom she was to live
This intelligence somewhat quieted the violence of my sorrows I instantly formed a plan of meeting them in London and by revealing the whole dreadful story convincing this irritated parent that he had nothing more to apprehend from his daughters unfortunate choice My mother consented and gave me a letter to prove the truth of my assertions As I could but ill afford to make this journey I travelled in the cheapest way that was possible I took an obscure lodgingI need not Madam tell you whereand boarded with the people of the house
Here I languished week after week vainly hoping for the arrival of my family but my impetuosity had blinded me to the imprudence of which I was guilty in quitting Scotland so hastily My wounded father after his recovery relapsed and when I had waited in the most comfortless situation for six weeks my friend wrote me word that the journey was yet deferred for some time longer
My finances were then nearly exhausted and I was obliged though most unwillingly to beg further assistance from my mother that I might return to Scotland Oh Madammy answer was not from herselfit was written by a lady who had long been her companion and aquainted me that she had been taken suddenly ill of a feverand was no more
The compassionate nature of which you have given such noble proofs assures me I need not if I could paint to you the anguish of a mind overwhelmed with such accumulated sorrows
Inclosed was a letter to a near relation which she had during her illness with much difficulty written and in which with the strongest maternal tenderness she described my deplorable situation and intreated his interest to procure me some preferment Yet so sunk was I by misfortune that a fortnight elapsed before I had the courage or spirit to attempt delivering this letter I was then compelled to it by want To make my appearance with some decency I was necessitated myself to the melancholy task of changing my coloured clothes for a suit of mourning and then I proceeded to seek my relation
I was informed he was not in town
In this desperate situation the pride of my heart which hitherto had not bowed to adversity gave way and I determined to intreat the assistance of my friend whose offered services I had a thousand times rejected Yet Madam so hard is it to root from the mind its favourite principles or prejudices call them which you please that I lingered another week ere I had the resolution to send away a letter which I regarded as the death of my independence
At length reduced to my last shilling shunned insolently by the people of the house and almost famished I sealed this fatal letter and with a heavy heart determined to take it to the post office But Mr Branghton and his son suffered me not to pass through their shop with impunity they insulted me grossly and threatened me with imprisonment if I did not immediately satisfy their demands Stung to the soul I bid them have but a days patience and flung from them in a state of mind too terrible for description
My letter which I now found would be received too late to save me from disgrace I tore into a thousand pieces and scarce could I refrain from putting an instantaneous an unlicensed a period to my existence
In this disorder of my senses I formed the horrible plan of turning footpad for which purpose I returned to my lodging and collected whatever of my apparel I could part with which I immediately sold and with the produce purchased a brace of pistols powder and shot I hope however you will believe me when I most solemnly assure you my sole intention was to frighten the passengers I should assault with these dangerous weapons which I had not loaded but from a resolutiona dreadful one I ownto save myself from an ignominious death if seized And indeed I thought that if I could but procure money sufficient to pay Mr Branghton and make a journey to Scotland I should soon be able to by the public papers to discover whom I had injured and to make private retribution
But Madam new to every species of villainy my perturbation was so great that I could with difficulty support myself yet the Branghtons observed it not as I passed through the shop
Here I stopwhat followed is better known to yourself But no time can ever efface from my memory that moment when in the very action of preparing for my own destruction or the lawless seizure of the property of others you rushed into the room and arrested my armIt was indeed an awful momentthe hand of Providence seemed to intervene between me and eternity I beheld you as an angelI thought you dropt from the cloudsThe earth indeed had never presented to my view a form so celestialWhat wonder then that a spectacle so astonishing should to a man disordered as I was appear too beautiful to be human
And now Madam that I have performed this painful task the more grateful one remains of rewarding as far as is in my power your generous goodness by assuring you it shall not be thrown away You have awakened me to a sense of the false pride by which I have been actuateda pride which while it scorned assistance from a friend scrupled not to compel it from a stranger though at the hazard of reducing that stranger to a situation as destitute as my own Yet oh how violent was the struggle which tore my conflicting soul ere I could persuade myself to profit by the benevolence which you were so evidently disposed to exert in my favour
By means of a ring the gift of my muchregretted mother I have for the present satisfied Mr Branghton and by means of your compassion I hope to support myself either till I hear from my friend to whom at length I have written or till the relation of my mother returns to town
To talk to you Madam of paying my debt would be vain I never can the service you have done me exceeds all power of return you have restored me to my senses you have taught me to curb those passions which bereft me of them and since I cannot avoid calamity to bear it as a man An interposition so wonderfully circumstanced can never be recollected without benefit Yet allow me to say the pecuniary part of my obligation must be settled by my first ability
I am Madam with the most profound respect and heartfelt gratitude
Your obedient and devoted humble servant J MACARTNEY
LETTER LII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Holborn July 15 oclock in the morning
O SIR what and adventure have I to writeall night it has occupied my thoughts and I am now risen thus early to write it to you
Yesterday it was settled that we should spend the evening in Marybone
Gardens where M Torre a celebrated foreigner was to exhibit some
fireworks The party consisted of Madame Duval all the Branghtons
M Du Bois Mr Smith and Mr Brown
We were almost the first persons who entered the Gardens Mr Branghton having declared he would have all he could get for his money which at best was only fooled away at such silly and idle places
We walked in parties and very much detached from one another. Mr Brown and Miss Polly led the way by themselves Miss Branghton and Mr Smith followed and the latter seemed determined to be revenged for my behaviour at the ball by transferring all his former attention for me to Miss Branghton who received it with an air of exultation and very frequently they each of them though from different motives looked back to discover whether I observed their good intelligence Madame Duval walked with M Du Bois and Mr Branghton by himself but his son would willingly have attached himself wholly to me saying frequently come Miss lets you and I have a little fun together you see they have all left us so now lets leave them But I begged to be excused and went to the other side of Madame Duval
This Garden as it is called is neither striking for magnificence nor for beauty and we were all so dull and languid that I was extremely glad when we were summoned to the orchestra upon the opening of a concert in the course of which I had the pleasure of hearing a concerto on the violin by Mr Barthelemon who to me seems a player of exquisite fancy feeling and variety
When notice was given us that the fireworks were preparing we hurried along to secure good places for the sight but very soon we were so encircled and incommoded by the crowd that Mr Smith proposed the ladies should make interest for a form to stand upon this was soon effected and the men then left us to accommodate themselves better saying they would return the moment the exhibition was over
The firework was really beautiful and told with wonderful ingenuity the story of Orpheus and Eurydice but at the moment of the fatal look which separated them for ever there was such an explosion of fire and so horrible a noise that we all as of one accord jumpt hastily from the form and ran away some paces fearing that we were in danger of mischief from the innumerable sparks of fire which glittered in the air
For a moment or two I neither knew nor considered whither I had run
but my
recollection was soon awakened by a strangers addressing me with
Come along with me my dear and Ill take care of you
I started and then to my great terror perceived that I had outrun all my companions and saw not one human being I knew With all the speed in my power and forgetful of my first fright I hastened back to the place I had leftbut found the form occupied by a new set of people
In vain from side to side I looked for some face I knew I found myself in the midst of a crowd yet without party friend or acquaintance I walked in disordered haste from place to place without knowing which way to turn or whither I went Every other moment I was spoken to by some bold and unfeeling man to whom my distress which I think must be very apparent only furnished a pretence for impertinent witticisms or free gallantry
At last a young officer marching fiercely up to me said You are a sweet pretty creature and I enlist you in my service and then with great violence he seized my hand I screamed aloud with fear and forcibly snatching it away I ran hastily up to two ladies and cried for Heavens sake dear ladies afford me some protection
They heard me with a loud laugh but very readily said Ay let her walk between us and each of them took hold of an arm
Then in a drawling ironical tone of voice they asked what had frightened my little Ladyship I told them my adventure very simply and intreated they would have the goodness to assist me in finding my friends
O yes to be sure they said I should not want for friends whilst I was with them Mine I said would be very grateful for any civilities with which they might favour me But imagine my dear Sir how I must have been confounded when I observed that every other word I spoke produced a loud laugh However I will not dwell upon a conversation which soon to my inexpressible horror convinced me I had sought protection from insult of those who were themselves most likely to offer it You my dearest Sir I well know will both feel for and pity my terror which I have no words to describe
Had I been at liberty I should have instantly run away from them when I made the shocking discovery but as they held me fast that was utterly impossible and such was my dread of their resentment or abuse that I did not dare make any open attempt to escape
They asked me a thousand questions accompanied by as many halloos of who I was what I was and whence I came My answers were very incoherentbut what good Heaven were my emotions when a few moments afterwards I perceived advancing our wayLord Orville
Never shall I forget what I felt at that instant had I indeed been sunk to the guilty state which such companions might lead him to suspect I could scarce have had feelings more cruelly depressing
However to my infinite joy he passed us without distinguishing me though I saw that in a careless manner his eyes surveyed the party
As soon as he was gone one of these unhappy women said Do you know that young fellow
Not thinking it possible she should mean Lord Orville by such a term
I readily answered No Madam
Why then answered she you have a monstrous good stare for a little county Miss
I now found I had mistaken her but was glad to avoid an explanation
A few minutes after what was my delight to hear the voice of
Mr Brown who called out Lord int that Miss whats her name
Thank God cried I suddenly springing from them both thank God
I have found my party
Mr Brown was however alone and without knowing what I did
I took hold of his arm
Lord Miss cried he weve had such a hunt you cant think some of them thought you was gone home but I says says I I dont think says I that shes like to go home all alone says I
So that gentleman belongs to you Miss does he said one of the women
Yes Madam answered I and I now thank you for your civility but as I am safe will not give you any further trouble
I courtsied slightly and would gave walked away but most unfortunately Madame Duval and the two Miss Branghtons just then joined us
They all began to make a thousand enquiries to which I briefly answered that I had been obliged to these two ladies for walking with me and would tell them more another time for though I felt great comparative courage I was yet too much intimidated by their presence to dare be explicit
Nevertheless I ventured once more to wish them a goodnight and proposed seeking Mr Branghton These unhappy women listened to all that was said with a kind of callous curiosity and seemed determined not to take any hint But my vexation was terribly augmented when after having whispered something to each other they very cavalierly declared that they intended joining our party and then one of them very boldly took hold of my arm while the other going round seized that of Mr Brown and thus almost forcibly we were moved on between them and followed by Madame Duval and the Miss Branghton
It would be very difficult to say which was greatest my fright or Mr Browns consternation who ventured not to make the least resistance though his uneasiness made him tremble almost as much as myself I would instantly have withdrawn my arm but it was held so tight I could not move it and poor Mr Brown was circumstanced in the same manner on the other side for I heard him say Lord Maam theres no need to squeeze ones arm so
And this was our situationfor we had not taken three steps whenO sirwe again met Lord Orvillebut not again did he pass quietly by usunhappily I caught his eyeboth mine immediately were bent to the ground but he approached me and we all stopped
I then looked up He bowed Good God with what expressive eyes did he regard me Never were surprise and concern so strongly markedyes my dear Sir he looked greatly concerned and that the remembrance of that is the only consolation I feel for an evening the most painful of my life
What he said I know not for indeed I seemed to have neither ears nor understanding but I recollect that I only courtsied in silence He paused for an instant as ifI believe soas if unwilling to pass on and then finding the whole party detained he again bowed and took leave
Indeed my dear Sir I thought I should have fainted so great was my emotion from shame vexation and a thousand other feelings for which I have no expressions I absolutely tore myself from the womans arms and then disengaging myself from that of Mr Brown I went to Madame Duval and besought that she would not suffer me to be again parted from her
I fancythat Lord Orville saw what passed for scarcely was I at liberty ere he returned Methought my dear Sir the pleasure the surprise of that moment recompensed me for all the chagrin I had before felt for do you not think that his return manifests for a character so quiet so reserved as Lord Orvilles something like solicitude in my concerns such at least was the interpretation I involuntarily made upon again seeing him
With a politeness to which I have been sometime very little used he apologized for returning and then inquired after the health of Mrs Mirvan and the rest of the Howard Grove family The flattering conjecture which I have just acknowledged had so wonderfully restored my spirits that I believe I never answered him so readily and with so little constraint Very short however was the duration of this conversation for we were soon most disagreeably interrupted
The Miss Branghtons though they saw almost immediately the characters of the women to whom I had so unfortunately applied were nevertheless so weak and foolish as merely to titter at their behaviour As to Madame Duval she was for some time so strangely imposed upon that she thought they were two real fine ladies Indeed it is wonderful to see how easily and how frequently she is deceived Our disturbance however arose from young Brown who was now between the two women by whom his arms were absolutely pinioned to his sides for a few minutes his complaints had been only murmured but he now called out aloud Goodness Ladies you hurt me like any thing why I cant walk at all if you keep pinching my arms so
This speech raised a loud laugh in the women and redoubled the tittering of the Miss Branghtons For my own part I was most cruelly confused while the countenance of Lord Orville manifested a sort of indignant astonishment and from that moment he spoke to me no more till he took leave
Madame Duval who now began to suspect her company proposed our taking the first box we saw empty bespeaking a supper and waiting till Mr Branghton should find us
Miss Polly mentioned one she had remarked to which we all turned Madame Duval instantly seated herself and the two bold women forcing the frightened Mr Brown to go between them followed her example
Lord Orville with an air of gravity that wounded my very soul then wished me good night I said not a word but my face if it had any connection with my heart must have looked melancholy indeed and so I have some reason to believe it did for he added with much more softness though no less dignity Will Miss Anville allow me to ask her address and to pay my respects to her before I leave town
O how I changed colour at this unexpected requestyet what was the mortification I suffered in answering My Lord I amin Holborn
He then bowed and left us
What what can he think of this adventure how strangely how cruelly have all appearances turned against me Had I been blessed with any presence of mind I should instantly have explained to him the accident which occasioned my being in such terrible companybut I have none
As to the rest of the evening I cannot relate the particulars of what passed for to you I only write of what I think and I can think of nothing but this unfortunate this disgraceful meeting These two wretched women continued to torment us all but especially poor Mr Brown who seemed to afford them uncommon diversion till we were discovered by Mr Branghton who very soon found means to release us from their persecutions by frightening them away We stayed but a short time after they left us which was all employed in explanation
Whatever may be the construction which Lord Orville may put upon this affair to me it cannot fail of being unfavourable to be seengracious Heaven to be seen in company with two women of such characterHow vainly how proudly have I wished to avoid meeting him when only with the Branghtons and Madame Duvalbut now how joyful should I be had he seen me to no greater disadvantageHolborn too what a direction he who had alwaysbut I will not torment you my dearest Sir with any more of my mortifying conjectures and apprehensions perhaps he may calland then I shall have an opportunity of explaining to him all the most shocking part of the adventure And yet as I did not tell him at whose house I lived he may not be able to discover me I merely said in Holborn and he who I suppose saw my embarrassment forbore to ask any other direction
Well I must take my chance
Yet let me in the justice to Lord Orville and in justice to the high opinion I have always entertained of his honour and delicacylet me observe the difference of his behaviour when nearly in the same situation to that of Sir Clement Willoughby He had at least equal cause to depreciate me in his opinion and to mortify and sink me in my own but far different was his conductperplexed indeed he looked and much surprisedbut it was benevolently not with insolence I am even inclined to think that he could not see a young creature whom he had so lately known in a higher sphere appear so suddenly so strangely so disgracefully altered in her situation without some pity and concern But whatever might be his doubts and suspicions far from suffering them to influence his behaviour he spoke he looked with the same politeness and attention with which he had always honoured me when countenanced by Mrs Mirvan
Once again let me drop this subject
In every mortification every disturbance how grateful to my heart how sweet to my recollection is the certainty of your neverfailing tenderness sympathy and protection Oh Sir could I upon this subject could I write as I feelhow animated would be the language of your devoted EVELINA
LETTER LIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Holborn July 1st
LISTLESS uneasy and without either spirit or courage to employ myself from the time I had finished my last letter I indolently seated myself at the window where while I waited Madame Duvals summons to breakfast I perceived among the carriages which passed by a coronetcoach and in a few minutes from the window of it Lord Orville I instantly retreated but not I believe unseen for the coach immediately drove up to our door
Indeed my dear Sir I must own I was greatly agitated the idea of receiving Lord Orville by myselfthe knowledge that his visit was entirely to methe wish of explaining the unfortunate adventure of yesterdayand the mortification of my present circumstancesall these thoughts occurring to me nearly at the same time occasioned me more anxiety confusion and perplexity than I can possibly express
I believe he meant to sent up his name but the maid unused to such a ceremony forgot it by the way and only told me that a great Lord was below and desired to see me and the next moment he appeared himself
If formerly when in the circle of high life and accustomed to its manners I so much admired and distinguished the grace the elegance of Lord Orville think Sir how they must strike me nownow when far removed from that splendid circle I live with those to whom even civility is unknown and decorum a stranger
I am sure I received him very awkwardly depressed by a situation so disagreeablecould I do otherwise When his first enquiries were made I think myself very fortunate he said in meeting with Miss Anville at home and still more so in finding her disengaged
I only courtsied He then talked of Mrs Mirvan asked how long I had been in town and other such general questions which happily gave me time to recover from my embarrassment After which he said If Miss Anville will allow me the honour of sitting by her a few minutes for we were both standing I will venture to tell her the motive which next to enquiring after her health has prompted me to wait on her thus early
We were then both seated and after a short pause he said How to apologize for so great a liberty as I am upon the point of taking I know notshall I therefore rely wholly upon your goodness and not apologize at all
I only bowed
I should be extremely sorry to appear impertinentyet hardly know how to avoid it
Impertinent O my Lord cried I eagerly that I am sure is impossible
You are very good answered he and encourage me to be ingenuous
Again he stopped but my expectation was too great for speech At last without looking at me in a low voice and hesitating manner he said Were those ladies with whom I saw you last night ever in your company before
No my Lord cried I rising and colouring violently nor will they ever be again
He rose too and with an air of the most condescending concern said Pardon Madam the abruptness of a question which I knew not how to introduce as I ought and for which I have no excuse to offer but my respect for Mrs Mirvan joined to the sincerest wishes for your happiness yet I fear I have gone too far
I am very sensible of the honour of your lordships attention said I but
Permit me to assure you cried he finding I hesitated that officiousness is not my characteristic and that I would by no means have risked your displeasure had I not been fully satisfied you were too generous to be offended without a real cause of offence
Offended cried I no my Lord I am only grievedgrieved indeed to find myself in a situation so unfortunate as to be obliged to make explanations which cannot but mortify and shock me
It is I alone cried he with some eagerness who am shocked as it is I who deserve to be mortified I seek no explanation for I have no doubt but in mistaking me Miss Anville injures herself allow me therefore frankly and openly to tell you the intention of my visit
I bowed and we both returned to our seats
I will own myself to have been greatly surprised continued he when I met you yesterday evening in company with two persons who I was sensible merited not the honour of your notice nor was it easy for me to conjecture the cause of your being so situated yet believe me my incertitude did not for a moment do you injury I was satisfied that their characters must be unknown to you and I thought with concern of the shock you would sustain when you discovered their unworthiness I should not however upon so short an acquaintance have usurped the privilege of intimacy in giving my unasked sentiments upon so delicate a subject had I not known that credulity is the sister of innocence and therefore feared you might be deceived A something which I could not resist urged me to the freedom I have taken to caution you but I shall not easily forgive myself if I have been so unfortunate as to give you pain
The pride which his first question had excited now subsided into delight and gratitude and I instantly related to him as well as I could the accident which had occasioned my joining the unhappy women with whom he had met me He listened with an attention so flattering seemed so much interested during the recital and when I had done thanked me in terms so polite for what he was pleased to call my condescension that I was almost ashamed either to look at or hear him
Soon after the maid came to tell me that Madame Duval desired to have breakfast made in her own room
I fear cried Lord Orville instantly rising that I have intruded upon your timeyet who so situated could do otherwise Then taking my hand Will Miss Anville allow me thus to seal my peace he pressed it to his lips and took leave
Generous noble Lord Orville how disinterested his conduct how delicate his whole behaviour Willing to advise yet afraid to wound meCan I ever in future regret the adventure I met with at Marybone since it has been productive of a visit so flattering Had my mortifications been still more humiliating my terrors still more alarming such a mark of esteemmay I not call it sofrom Lord Orville would have made me ample amends
And indeed my dear Sir I require some consolation in my present very disagreeable situation for since he went two incidents have happened that had not my spirits been particularly elated would greatly have disconcerted me
During breakfast Madame Duval very abruptly asked if I should like to be married and added that Mr Branghton had been proposing a match for me with his son Surprised and I must own provoked I assured her that in thinking of me Mr Branghton would very vainly lose his time
Why cried she I have had grander views for you myself if once I could get you to Paris and make you be owned but if I cant do that and you can do no better why as you are both my relations I think to leave my fortune between you and then if you marry you never need want for nothing
I begged her not to pursue the subject as I assured her Mr Branghton was totally disagreeable to me but she continued her admonitions and reflections with her usual disregard of whatever I could answer She charged me very peremptorily neither wholly to discourage nor yet to accept Mr Branghtons offer till she saw what could be done for me the young man she added had often intended to speak to me himself but not well knowing how to introduce the subject he had desired her to pave the way for him
I scrupled not warmly and freely to declare my aversion to this proposal but it was to no effect she concluded just as she had begun by saying that I should not have him if I could do better
Nothing however shall persuade me to listen to any other person concerning this odious affair
My second cause of uneasiness arises very unexpectedly from M Du Bois who to my infinite surprise upon Madame Duvals quitting the room after dinner put into my hand a note and immediately left the house
This note contains an open declaration of an attachment to me which he says he should never have presumed to have acknowledged had he not been informed that Madame Duval destined my hand to young Branghtona match which he cannot endure to think of He beseeches me earnestly to pardon his temerity professes the most inviolable respect and commits his fate to time patience and pity
This conduct in M du Bois gives me real concern as I was disposed to think very well of him It will not however be difficult to discourage him and therefore I shall not acquaint Madame Duval of his letter as I have reason to believe it would greatly displease her
LETTER LIV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION July 3rd
O SIR how much uneasiness must I suffer to counterbalance one short morning of happiness
Yesterday the Branghtons proposed a party to Kensington Gardens and as usual Madame Duval insisted upon my attendance
We went in a hackneycoach to Piccadilly and then had a walk through Hyde Park which in any other company would have been delightful I was much pleased with Kensington Gardens and think them infinitely preferable to those of Vauxhall
Young Branghton was extremely troublesome he insisted upon walking by my side and talked with me almost by compulsion however my reserve and coldness prevented his entering upon the hateful subject which Madame Duval had prepared me to apprehend Once indeed when I was accidentally a few yards before the rest he said I suppose Miss aunt has told you aboutyou know whathant she MissBut I turned from him without making any answer Neither Mr Smith nor Mr Brown were of the party and poor M Du Bois when he found that I avoided him looked so melancholy that I was really sorry for him
While we were strolling round the garden I perceived walking with a party of ladies at some distance Lord Orville I instantly retreated behind Miss Branghton and kept out of sight till we had passed him for I dreaded being seen by him again in a public walk with a party of which I was ashamed
Happily I succeeded in my design and saw no more of him for a sudden and violent shower of rain made us all hasten out of the gardens We ran till we came to a small greenshop where we begged shelter Here we found ourselves in company with two footmen whom the rain had driven into the shop Their livery I thought I had before seen and upon looking from the window I perceived the same upon a coachman belonging to a carriage which I immediately recollected to be Lord Orvilles
Fearing to be know I whispered Miss Branghton not to speak my name Had I considered but a moment I should have been sensible of the inutility of such a caution since not one of the party call me by any other appellation than that of Cousin or of Miss but I am perpetually involved in some distress or dilemma from my own heedlessness
This request excited very strongly her curiosity and she attacked me with such eagerness and bluntness of enquiry that I could not avoid telling her the reason of my making it and consequently that I was known to Lord Orville an acknowledgment which proved the most unfortunate in the world for she would not rest till she had drawn from me the circumstances attending my first making the acquaintance Then calling to her sister she said Lord Polly only think Miss has danced with a Lord
Well cried Polly thats a thing I should never have thought of And pray Miss what did he say to you
This question was much sooner asked than answered and they both became so very inquisitive and earnest that they soon drew the attention of Madame Duval and the rest of the party to whom in a very short time they repeated all they had gathered from me
Goodness then cried young Branghton if I was Miss if I would not make free with his Lordships coach to take me to town
Why ay said the father there would be some sense in that that would be making some use of a Lords acquaintance for it would save us coachhire
Lord Miss cried Polly I wish you would for I should like of all things to ride in a coronetcoach
I promise you said Madame Duval Im glad youve thought of it for I dont see no objectionso lets have the coachman called
Not for the world cried I very much alarmed indeed it is utterly impossible
Why so demanded Mr Branghton pray wheres the good of your knowing a Lord if your never the better for him
Ma foi child said Madame Duval you dont know no more of the world that if you was a baby Pray Sir to one of the footmen tell that coachman to draw up for I wants to speak to him
The man stared but did not move Pray pray Madame said I pray Mr Branghton have the goodness to give up this plan I know but very little of his Lordship and cannot upon any account take so great a liberty
Dont say nothing about it said Madam Duval for I shall have it my own way so if you wont call the coachman Sir Ill promise you Ill call him myself
The footman very impertinently laughed and turned upon his heel Madame Duval extremely irritated ran out in the rain and beckoned the coachman who instantly obeyed her summons Shocked beyond all expression I flew after her and entreated her with the utmost earnestness to let us return in a hackney coachbut ohshe is impenetrable to persuasion She told the man she wanted him to carry her directly to town and that she would answer for him to Lord Orville The man with a sneer thanked her but said he should answer for himself and was driving off when another footman came up to him with information that his Lord was gone into Kensington Palace and would not want him for an hour or two
Why then friend said Mr Branghton for we were followed by all the party where will be the great harm of your taking us to town
Besides said the son Ill promise you a pot of beer for my own share
These speeches had no other answer from the coachman than a loud laugh which was echoed by the insolent footmen I rejoiced at their resistance though I was certain that if their Lord had witnessed their impertinence they would have been instantly dismissed his service
Pardi cried Madame Duval if I dont think all the footmen are the most impudentest fellows in the kingdom But Ill promise you Ill have your master told of your airs so youll get no good by em
Why pray said the coachman rather alarmed did my Lord give you leave to use the coach
Its no matter for that answered she Im sure if hes a gentleman hed let us have it sooner than we should be wet to the skin but Ill promise you he shall know how saucy youve been for this young lady knows him very well
Ay that she does said Miss Polly and shes danced with him too
Oh how I repented my foolish mismanagement The men bit their lips and looked at one another in some confusion This was perceived by our party who taking advantage of it protested they would write Lord Orville word of their ill behaviour without delay This quite startled them and one of the footmen offered to run to the palace and ask his Lords permission for our having the carriage
This proposal really made me tremble and the Branghtons all hung back upon it but Madame Duval is never to be dissuaded from a scheme she has once formed Do so cried she and give this childs compliments to your master and tell him as we hant no coach here we should be glad to go just as far as Holborn in his
No no no cried I dont goI know nothing of his LordshipI send no messageI have nothing to say to him
The men very much perplexed could with difficulty restrain themselves from resuming their impertinent mirth Madame Duval scolded me vary angrily and then desired them to go directly Pray then said the coachman what name is to be given to my Lord
Anville answered Madame Duval tell him Miss Anville wants the coach the young lady he danced with once
I was really in an agony but the winds could not have been more deaf to me than those to whom I pleaded and therefore the footman urged by the repeated threats of Madame Duval and perhaps recollecting the name himself actually went to the palace with this strange message
He returned in a few minutes and bowing to me with the greatest respect said My Lord desires his compliments and his carriage will be always at Miss Anvilles service
I was so much affected by this politeness and chagrined at the whole affair that I could scarce refrain from tears Madame Duval and the Miss Branghtons eagerly jumped into the coach and desired me to follow I would rather have submitted to the severest punishment but all resistance was vain
During the whole ride I said not a word however the rest of the party were so talkative that my silence was very immaterial We stopped at our lodgings but when Madame Duval and I alighted the Branghtons asked if they could not be carried on to SnowHill The servants now all civility made no objection Remonstrances from me would I too well knew be fruitless and therefore with a heavy heart I retired to my room and left them to their own direction
Seldom have I passed a night in greater uneasinessSo lately to have cleared myself in the good opinion of Lord Orvilleso soon to forfeit itto give him reason to suppose I presumed to boast of his acquaintanceto publish his having danced with meto take with him a liberty I should have blushed to have taken with the most intimate of my friendsto treat with such impertinent freedom one who has honoured me with such distinguished respectIndeed Sir I could have met with no accident that would so cruelly have tormented me
If such were then my feelings imaginefor I cannot describe what I suffered during the scene I am now going to write
This morning while I was alone in the diningroom young Branghton called He entered with a most important air and strutting up to me said Miss Lord Orville sends his compliments to you
Lord Orville repeated I much amazed
Yes Miss Lord Orville for I know his Lordship now as well as youAnd a very civil gentleman he is for all hes a Lord
For Heavens sake cried I explain yourself
Why you must know Miss after we left you we met with a little misfortune but I dont mind it now for its all turned out for the best but just as we were agoing up SnowHill plump we comes against a cart with such a jogg it almost pulled the coachwheel off However that int the worst for as I went to open the door in a hurry athinking the coach would be broke down as illluck would have it I never minded that the glass was up and so I poked my head fairly through itOnly see Miss how Ive cut my forehead
A much worse accident to himself would not I believe at that moment have given me any concern for him however he proceeded with his account for I was too much confounded to interrupt him
Goodness Miss we were in such a stew us and the servants and all as you cant think for besides the glass being broke the coachman said how the coach wouldnt be safe to go back to Kensington So we didnt know what to do however the footmen said theyd go and tell his Lordship what had happened So then father grew quite uneasy like for fear of his Lordships taking offence and prejudicing us in our business so he said I should go this morning and ask his pardon cause of having broke the glass So then I asked the footmen the direction and they told me he lived in Berkeleysquare so this morning I wentand I soon found out the house
You did cried I quite out of breath with apprehension
Yes Miss and a very fine house it isDid you ever see it
No
Nowhy then Miss I know more of his Lordship than you do for all you knew him first So when I came to the door I was in a peck of troubles athinking what I should say to him however the servants had no mind I should see him for they told me he was busy but I might leave my message So I was just acoming away when I bethought myself to say I came from you
From me
Yes Miss for you know why should I have such a long walk as that for nothing So I says to the porter says I tell his Lordship says I one wants to speak to him as comes from one Miss Anville says I
Good God cried I and by what authority did you take such a liberty
Goodness Miss dont be in such a hurry for youll be as glad as me when you hear how well it all turned out So then they made way for me and said his Lordship would see me directly and there I was led through such a heap of servants and so many rooms that my heart quite misgave me for I thought thinks I hell be so proud hell hardly let me speak but hes no more proud than I am and he was as civil as if Id been a lord myself So then I said I hoped he wouldnt take it amiss about the glass for it was quite an accident but he bid me not mention it for it did not signify And then he said he hoped you got safe home and wasnt frightened so I said yes and I gave your duty to him
My duty to him exclaimed Iand who gave you leavewho desired you
O I did it out of my own head just to make him think I came from you But I should have told you before how the footman said he was going out of town tomorrow evening and that his sister was soon to be married and that he was aordering a heap of things for that so it come into my head as he was so affable that Id ask him for his custom So I says says I my Lord says I if your Lordship int engaged particularly my father is a silversmith and hell be very proud to serve you says I and Miss Anville as danced with you is his cousin and shes my cousin too and shed be very much obligated to you Im sure
Youll drive me wild cried I starting from my seat you have done me an irreparable injurybut I will hear no moreand then I ran into my own room
I was half frantic I really raved the good opinion of Lord Orville seemed now irretrievable lost a faint hope which in the morning I had vainly encouraged that I might see him again and explain the transaction wholly vanished now I found he was so soon to leave town and I could not but conclude that for the rest of my life he would regard me as an object of utter contempt
The very idea was a dagger to my heartI could not support it andbut I blush to proceedI fear your disapprobation yet I should not be conscious of having merited it but that the repugnance I feel to relate to you what I have done makes me suspect I must have erred Will you forgive me if I won that I first wrote an account of this transaction to Miss Mirvanand that I even thought of concealing it from youShortlived however was the ungrateful idea and sooner will I risk the justice of your displeasure than unworthily betray your generous confidence
You are now probably prepared for what followswhich is a lettera hasty letter that in the height of my agitation I wrote to Lord Orville
My Lord
I am so infinitely ashamed of the application made yesterday for your Lordships carriage in my name and so greatly shocked at hearing how much it was injured that I cannot forbear writing a few lines to clear myself from the imputation of an impertinence which I blush to be suspected of and to acquaint you that the request for your carriage was made against my consent and the visit with which you were importuned this morning without my knowledge
I am inexpressibly concerned at having been the instrument however innocently of so much trouble to your Lordship but I beg you to believe that the reading these lines is the only part of it which I have given voluntarily I am my Lord
Your Lordships most Humble servant EVELINA ANVILLE
I applied to the maid of the house to get this note conveyed to Berkleysquare but scarce had I parted with it before I regretted having written at all and I was flying down stairs to recover it when the voice of Sir Clement Willoughby stopped me As Madame Duval had ordered we should be denied to him I was obliged to return up stairs and after he was gone my application was too late as the maid had given it to a porter
My time did not pass very serenely while he was gone however he brought me no answer but that Lord Orville was not at home Whether or not he will take the trouble to send anyor whether he will condescend to callor whether the affair will rest as it is I know notbut in being ignorant am most cruelly anxious
LETTER LV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION July 4th
YOU may now my dear Sir send Mrs Clinton for your Evelina with as much speed as she can conveniently make the journey for no further opposition will be made to her leaving this town happy had it perhaps been for her had she never entered it
This morning Madame Duval desired me to go to SnowHill with an invitation to the Branghtons and Mr Smith to spend the evening with her and she desired M Du Bois who breakfasted with us to accompany me I was very unwilling to obey her as I neither wished to walk with M Du Bois nor yet to meet young Branghton And indeed another a yet more powerful reason added to my reluctancefor I thought it possible that Lord Orville might send some answer or perhaps might call during my absence however I did not dare dispute her commands
Poor M Du Bois spoke not a word during our walk which was I believe equally unpleasant to us both We found all the family assembled in the shop Mr Smith the moment he perceived me addressed himself to Miss Branghton whom he entertained with all the gallantry in his power I rejoice to find that my conduct at the Hampstead ball has had so good an effect But young Branghton was extremely troublesome he repeatedly laughed in my face and looked so impertinently significant that I was obliged to give up my reserve to M Du Bois and enter into conversation with him merely to avoid such boldness
Miss said Mr Branghton Im sorry to hear from my son that you wasnt pleased with what we did about that Lord Orville but I should like to know what it was you found fault with for we did all for the best
Goodness cried the son why if youd seen Miss youd have been surprisedshe went out of the room quite in a huff like
It is too late now said I to reason upon this subject but for the future I must take the liberty to request that my name may never be made use of without my knowledge May I tell Madame Duval that you will do her the favour to accept her invitation
As to me Maam said Mr Smith I am much obliged to the old lady but I have no mind to be taken in by her again youll excuse me Maam
All the rest promised to come and I then took leave but as I left the shop I heard Mr Branghton say Take courage Tom shes only coy And before I had walked ten yards the youth followed
I was so much offended that I would not look at him but began to converse with M Du Bois who was now more lively than I had ever before seen him for most unfortunately he misinterpreted the reason of my attention to him
The first intelligence I received when I came home was that two gentlemen had called and left cards I eagerly enquired for them and read the names of Lord Orville and Sir Clement Willoughby I by no means regretted that I missed seeing the latter but perhaps I may all my life regret that I missed the former for probably he has now left townand I may see him no more
My goodness cried young Branghton rudely looking over me only think of that Lords coming all this way Its my belief hed got some order ready for father and so hed a mind to call and ask you if Id told him the truth
Pray Betty cried I how long has he been gone
Not two minutes Maam
Why then Ill lay you any wager said young Branghton he saw you and I awalking up Holborn Hill
God forbid cried I impatiently and too much chagrined to bear with any more of his remarks I ran up stairs but I heard him say to M Du Bois Miss is so uppish this morning that I think I had better not speak to her again
I wish M Du Bois had taken the same resolution but he chose to follow me into the diningroom which he found empty
Vous ne laimez donc pas ce garcon Mademoiselle cried he
Me cried I no I detest him for I was sick at heart
Ah tu me rends la vie cried he and flinging himself at my feet he had just caught my hand as the door was opened by Madame Duval
Hastily and with marks of guilty confusion in his face he arose but the rage of that lady quite amazed me Advancing to the retreating M Du Bois she began in French an attack which her extreme wrath and wonderful volubility almost rendered unintelligible yet I understood but too much since her reproaches convinced me she had herself proposed being the object of his affection
He defended himself in a weak and evasive manner and upon her commanding him from her sight very readily withdrew and then with yet greater violence she upbraided me with having seduced his heart called me an ungrateful designing girl and protested she would neither take me to Paris nor any more interest herself in my affairs unless I would instantly agree to marry young Branghton
Frightened as I had been at her vehemence this proposal restored all my courage and I frankly told her that in this point I never could obey her More irritated than ever she ordered me to quit the room
Such is the present situation of affairs I shall excuse myself from seeing the Branghtons this afternoon indeed I never wish to see them again I am sorry however innocently that I have displeased Madame Duval yet I shall be very glad to quit this town for I believe it does not now contain one person I ever wish to again meet Had I but seen Lord Orville I should regret nothing I could then have more fully explained what I so hastily wrote yet it will always be a pleasure to me to recollect that he called since I flatter myself it was in consequence of his being satisfied with my letter
Adieu my dear Sir the time now approaches when I hope once more to receive your blessing and to owe all my joy all my happiness to your kindness
LETTER LVI
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill July 7th
WELCOME thrice welcome my darling Evelina to the arms of the truest the fondest of your friends Mrs Clinton who shall hasten to you with these lines will conduct you directly hither for I can consent no longer to be parted from the child of my bosomthe comfort of my agethe sweet solace of all my infirmities Your worthy friends at Howard Grove must pardon me that I rob them of the visit you proposed to make them before your return to Berry Hill for I find my fortitude unequal to a longer separation
I have much to say to you many comments to make upon your late letters some parts of which give me no little uneasiness but I will reserve my remarks for our future conversations Hasten then to the spot of thy nativity the abode of thy youth where never yet care or sorrow had power to annoy theeO that they might ever be banished this peaceful dwelling
Adieu my dearest Evelina I pray but that thy satisfaction at our approaching meeting may bear any comparison with mine ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER LVII
EVELINA TO MISS MIRVAN Berry Hill July 14th
MY Sweet Maria will be much surprised and I am willing to flatter myself concerned when instead of her friend she receives this letterthis cold this inanimate letter which will but ill express the feelings of the heart which indites it
When I wrote to you last Friday I was in hourly expectation of seeing Mrs Clinton with whom I intended to have set out for Howard Grove Mrs Clinton came but my plan was necessarily altered for she brought me a letterthe sweetest that ever was penned from the best and kindest friend that ever orphan was blessed with requiring my immediate attendance at Berry Hill
I obeyedand pardon me if I own I obeyed without reluctance after so long a separation should I not else have been the most ungrateful of mortalsAnd yetoh Maria though I wished to leave London the gratification of my wish afforded me no happiness and though I felt an impatience inexpressible to return hither no words no language can explain the heaviness of heart with which I made the journey I believe you would hardly have known meindeed I hardly know myself Perhaps had I first seen you in your kind and sympathizing bosom I might have ventured to have reposed every secret of my souland thenbut let me pursue my journal
Mrs Clinton delivered Madame Duval a letter from Mr Villars which requested her leave for my return and indeed it was very readily accorded yet when she found by my willingness to quit town that M Du Bois was really indifferent to me she somewhat softened in my favour and declared that but for punishing his folly in thinking of such a child she would not have consented to my being again buried in the country
All the Branghtons called to take leave of me but I will not write a word more about them indeed I cannot with any patience think of that family to whose forwardness and impertinence is owing all the uneasiness I at this moment suffer
So great was the depression of my spirits upon the road that it was with great difficulty I could persuade the worthy Mrs Clinton I was not ill but alas the situation of my mind was such as would have rendered any mere bodily pain by comparison even enviable
And yet when we arrived at Berry Hillwhen the chaise stopped at this placehow did my heart throb with joyand when through the window I beheld the dearest the most venerable of men with uplifted hands returning as I doubt not thanks for my safe arrivalgood God I thought it would have burst my bosomI opened the chaisedoor myself I flewfor my feet did not seem to touch the groundinto the parlour he had risen to meet me but the moment I appeared he sunk into his chair uttering with a deep sigh though his face beamed with delight My God I thank thee
I sprung forward and with a pleasure that bordered upon agony I embraced his knees I kissed his hands I wept over them but could not speak while he now raising his eyes in thankfulness towards heaven now bowing down his reverend head and folding me in his arms could scarce articulate the blessings with which his kind and benevolent heart overflowed
O Miss Mirvan to be so beloved by the best of menshould I not be happyShould I have one wish save that of meriting his goodnessYet think me not ungrateful indeed I am not although the internal sadness of my mind unfits me at present for enjoying as I ought the bounties of Providence
I cannot journalize cannot arrange my ideas into order
How little has situation to do with happiness I had flattered myself that when restored to Berry Hill I should be restored to tranquillity far otherwise have I found it for never yet had tranquillity and Evelina so little intercourse
I blush for what I have written Can you Maria forgive my gravity but I restrain it so much and so painfully in the presence of Mr Villars that I know not how to deny myself the consolation of indulging it to you
Adieu my dear Miss Mirvan
Yet one thing I must add do not let the seriousness of this letter deceive you do not impute to a wrong cause the melancholy I confess by supposing that the heart of your friend mourns a too great susceptibility no indeed believe me it never was never can be more assuredly her own than at this moment So witness in all truth Your affectionate EVELINA
You will make my excuses to the honoured Lady Howard and to your dear mother
LETTER LVIII
EVELINA TO MISS MIRVAN Berry Hill July 21st
YOU accuse me of mystery and charge me with reserve I cannot doubt but I must have merited the accusation yet to clear myselfyou know not how painful will be the task But I cannot resist your kind entreatiesindeed I do not wish to resist them for your friendship and affection will soothe my chagrin Had it arisen from any other cause not a moment would I have deferred the communication you askbut as it is I would were it possible not only conceal it from all the world but endeavour to disbelieve it myself Yet since I must tell you why trifle with your impatience
I know not how to come to the point twenty times have I attempted it in vainbut I will force myself to proceed
Oh Miss Mirvan could you ever have believed that one who seemed formed as a pattern for his fellowcreatures as a model of perfectionone whose elegance surpassed all descriptionwhose sweetness of manners disgraced all comparisonoh Miss Mirvan could you ever have believed that Lord Orville would have treated me with indignity
Never never again will I trust to appearancesnever confide in my own weak judgmentnever believe that person to be good who seems to be amiable What cruel maxims are we taught by a knowledge of the worldBut while my own reflections absorb me I forget you are still in suspense
I had just finished the last letter which I wrote to you from London when the maid of the house brought me a note It was given to her she said by a footman who told her he would call the next day for an answer
This notebut let it speak for itself
To Miss Anville
With transport most charming of thy sex did I read
the letter
with which you yesterday morning favoured me I am sorry the
affair of the carriage should have given you any concern
but I am highly flattered by the anxiety you express so
kindly Believe me my lovely girl I am truly sensible
to the honour of your good opinion and feel myself deeply
penetrated with love and gratitude The correspondence you
have so sweetly commenced I shall be proud of continuing
and I hope the strong sense I have of the favour you do me
will prevent your withdrawing it Assure yourself that I
desire nothing more ardently than to pour forth my thanks at
your feet and to offer those vows which are so justly the
tribute of your charms and accomplishments In your next
I intreat you to acquaint me how long you shall remain in
town The servant whom I shall commission to call for an
answer has orders to ride post with it to me My impatience
for his arrival will be very great though inferior to that
with which I burn to tell you in person how much I am
my sweet girl your grateful admirer ORVILLE
What a letter how has my proud heart swelled every line I have copied What I wrote to him you know tell me then my dear friend do you think it merited such an answerand that I have deservedly incurred the liberty he has taken I meant nothing but a simple apology which I thought as much due to my own character as to his yet by the construction he seems to have put upon it should you not have imagined it contained the avowal of sentiments which might indeed have provoked his contempt
The moment the letter was delivered to me I retired to my own room to read it and so eager was my first perusal thatI am ashamed to ownit gave me no sensation but of delight Unsuspicious of any impropriety from Lord Orville I perceived not immediately the impertinence it impliedI only marked the expressions of his own regard and I was so much surprised that I was unable for some time to compose myself or read it againI could only walk up and down the room repeating to myself Good God is it possibleam I then loved by Lord Orville
But this dream was soon over and I awoke to far different feelings Upon a second reading I thought every word changedit did not seem the same letterI could not find one sentence that I could look at without blushing my astonishment was extreme and it was succeeded by the utmost indignation
If as I am very ready to acknowledge I erred in writing to Lord Orville was it for him to punish the error If he was offended could he not have been silent If he thought my letter illjudged should he not have pitied my ignorance have considered my youth and allowed for my inexperience
Oh Maria how have I been deceived in this man Words have no power to tell the high opinion I had of him to that was owing the unfortunate solicitude which prompted my writing a solicitude I must for ever repent
Yet perhaps I have rather reason to rejoice than to grieve since this affair has shown me his real disposition and removed that partiality which covering his every imperfection left only his virtues and good qualities exposed to view Had the deception continued much longer had my mind received any additional prejudice in his favour who knows whither my mistaken ideas might have led me Indeed I fear I was in greater danger than I apprehended or can now think of without tremblingfor oh if this weak heart of mine had been penetrated with too deep an impression of his meritmy peace and happiness had been lost for ever
I would fain encourage more cheerful thoughts fain drive from my mind the melancholy that has taken possession of it but I cannot succeed for added to the humiliating feelings which so powerfully oppress me I have yet another cause of concernalas my dear Maria I have broken the tranquillity of the best of men
I have never had the courage to show him this cruel letter I could not bear so greatly to depreciate in his opinion one whom I had with infinite anxiety raised in it myself Indeed my first determination was to confine my chagrin totally to my own bosom but your friendly enquiries have drawn it from me and now I wish I had made no concealment from the beginning since I know not how to account for a gravity which not all my endeavours can entirely hide or repress
My greatest apprehension is lest he should imagine that my residence in London has given me a distaste to the country Every body I see takes notice of my being altered and looking pale and ill I should be very indifferent to all such observations did I not perceive that they draw upon me the eyes of Mr Villars which glisten with affectionate concern
This morning in speaking of my London expedition he mentioned Lord Orville I felt so much disturbed that I would instantly have changed the subject but he would not allow me and very unexpectedly he began his panegyric extolling in strong terms his manly and honourable behaviour in regard to the Marybone adventure My cheeks glowed with indignation every word he spokeso lately as I had myself fancied him the noblest of his sex now that I was so well convinced of my mistake I could not bear to hear his undeserved praises uttered by one so really good so unsuspecting so pure of heart
What he thought of my silence and uneasiness I fear to know but I hope he will mention the subject no more I will not however with ungrateful indolence give way to a sadness which I find infectious to him who merits the most cheerful exertion of my spirits I am thankful that he has forborne to probe my wound and I will endeavour to heal it by the consciousness that I have not deserved the indignity I have received Yet I cannot but lament to find myself in a world so deceitful where we must suspect what we see distrust what we hear and doubt even what we feel
LETTER LIX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Berry Hill July 29th
I MUST own myself somewhat distressed how to answer your raillery yet believe me my dear Maria your suggestions are those of fancy not of truth I am unconscious of the weakness you suspect yet to dispel your doubts I will animate myself more than ever to conquer my chagrin and to recover my spirits
You wonder you say since my heart takes no part in this affair why it should make me so unhappy And can you acquainted as you are with the high opinion I entertained of Lord Orville can you wonder that so great a disappointment in his character should affect me Indeed had so strange a letter been sent to me from any body it could not have failed shocking me how much more sensibly then must I feel such an affront when received from the man in the world I had imagined least capable of giving it
You are glad I made no reply assure yourself my dear friend had this letter been the most respectful that could be written the clandestine air given to it by his proposal of sending his servant for my answer instead of having it directed to his house would effectually have prevented my writing Indeed I have an aversion the most sincere to all mysteries all private actions however foolishly and blameably in regard to this letter I have deviated from the open path which from my earliest infancy I was taught to tread
He talks of my having commenced a correspondence with him and could Lord Orville indeed believe I had such a design believe me so forward so bold so strangely ridiculous I know not if his man called or not but I rejoice that I quitted London before he came and without leaving any message for him What indeed could I have said it would have been a condescension very unmerited to have taken any the least notice of such a letter
Never shall I cease to wonder how he could write it Oh Maria what what could induce him so causelessly to wound and affront one who would sooner have died than wilfully offended him How mortifying a freedom of style how cruel an implication conveyed by his thanks and expressions of gratitude Is it not astonishing that any man can appear so modest who is so vain
Every hour I regret the secrecy I have observed with my beloved Mr Villars I know not what bewitched me but I felt at first a repugnance to publishing this affair that I could not surmountand now I am ashamed of confessing that I have any thing to confess Yet I deserve to be punished for the false delicacy which occasioned my silence since if Lord Orville himself was contented to forfeit his character was it for me almost at the expense of my own to support it
Yet I believe I should be very easy now the first shock is over and now that I see the whole affair with the resentment it merits did not all my good friends in this neighbourhood who think me extremely altered tease me about my gravity and torment Mr Villars with observations upon my dejection and falling away The subject is no sooner started than a deep gloom overspreads his venerable countenance and he looks at me with a tenderness so melancholy that I know not how to endure the consciousness of exciting it
Mrs Selwyn a lady of large fortune who lives about three miles from Berry Hill and who has always honoured me with very distinguishing marks of regard is going in a short time to Bristol and has proposed to Mr Villars to take me with her for the recovery of my health He seemed very much distressed whether to consent or refuse but I without any hesitation warmly opposed the scheme protesting my health could no where be better than in this pure air He had the goodness to thank me for this readiness to stay with him but he is all goodness Oh that it were in my power to be indeed what in the kindness of his heart he has called me the comfort of his age and solace of his infirmities
Never do I wish to be again separated from him If here I am grave elsewhere I should be unhappy In his presence with a very little exertion all the cheerfulness of my disposition seems ready to return the benevolence of his countenance reanimates the harmony of his temper composes the purity of his character edifies me I owe to him every thing and far from finding my debt of gratitude a weight the first pride the first pleasure of my life is the recollection of the obligations conferred upon me by a goodness so unequalled
Once indeed I thought there existed anotherwho when time had wintered oer his locks would have shone forth among his fellowcreatures with the same brightness of worth which dignifies my honoured Mr Villars a brightness how superior in value to that which results from mere quickness of parts wit or imagination a brightness which not contented with merely diffusing smiles and gaining admiration from the sallies of the spirits reflects a real and a glorious lustre upon all mankind Oh how great was my error how ill did I judge how cruelly have I been deceived
I will not go to Bristol though Mrs Selwyn is very urgent with mebut I desire not to see any more of the world the few months I have already passed in it have sufficed to give me a disgust even to its name
I hope too I shall see Lord Orville no more accustomed from my first knowledge of him to regard him as a being superior to his race his presence perhaps might banish my resentment and I might forget his ill conduct for oh MariaI should not know how to see Lord Orville and to think of displeasure
As a sister I loved himI could have entrusted him with every thought of my heart had he deigned to wish my confidence so steady did I think his honour so feminine his delicacy and so amiable his nature I have a thousand times imagined that the whole study of his life and whole purport of his reflections tended solely to the good and happiness of others but I will talkwritethink of him no more Adieu my dear friend
LETTER LX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Berry Hill August 10th
YOU complain of my silence my dear Miss Mirvanbut what have I to write Narrative does not offer nor does a lively imagination supply the deficiency I have however at present sufficient matter for a letter in relating a conversation I had yesterday with Mr Villars
Our breakfast had been the most cheerful we have had since my return hither and when it was over he did not as usual retire to his study but continued to converse with me while I worked We might probably have passed all the morning thus sociably but for the entrance of a farmer who came to solicit advice concerning some domestic affairs They withdrew together into the study
The moment I was alone my spirits failed me the exertion with which I had supported them had fatigued my mind I flung away my work and leaning my arms on the table gave way to a train of disagreeable reflections which bursting from the restraint that had smothered them filled me with unusual sadness
This was my situation when looking towards the door which was open
I perceived Mr Villars who was earnestly regarding me Is Farmer
Smith gone Sir cried I hastily rising and snatching up my work
Dont let me disturb you said he gravely I will go again to my study
Will you SirI was in hopes you were coming to sit here
In hopesand why Evelina should you hope it
This question was so unexpected that I knew not how to answer it but as I saw he was moving away I followed and begged him to return No my dear no said he with a forced smile I only interrupt your meditations
Again I knew not what to say and while I hesitated he retired My heart was with him but I had not the courage to follow The idea of an explanation brought on in so serious a manner frightened me I recollected the inference you had drawn from my uneasiness and I feared that he might make a similar interpretation
Solitary and thoughtful I passed the rest of the morning in my own room At dinner I again attempted to be cheerful but Mr Villars himself was grave and I had not sufficient spirits to support a conversation merely by my own efforts As soon as dinner was over he took a book and I walked to the window I believe I remained near an hour in this situation All my thoughts were directed to considering how I might dispel the doubts which I apprehended Mr Villars had formed without acknowledging a circumstance which I had suffered so much pain merely to conceal But while I was thus planning for the future I forgot the present and so intent was I upon the subject which occupied me that the strange appearance of my unusual inactivity and extreme thoughtfulness never occurred to me But when at last I recollected myself and turned round I saw that Mr Villars who had parted with his book was wholly engrossed in attending to me I started from my reverie and hardly knowing what I said asked if he had been reading
He paused a moment and then replied Yes my childa book that both afflicts and perplexes me
He means me thought I and therefore I made no answer
What if we read it together continued he will you assist me to clear its obscurity
I knew not what to say but I sighed involuntarily from the bottom of my heart He rose and approaching me said with emotion My child I can no longer be a silent witness of thy sorrowis not thy sorrow my sorrowand ought I to be a stranger to the cause when I so deeply sympathize in the effect
Cause Sir cried I greatly alarmed what causeI dont knowI cant tellI
Fear not said he kindly to unbosom thyself to me my dearest Evelina open to me thy whole heartit can have no feelings for which I will not make allowance Tell me therefore what it is that thus afflicts us both and who knows but I may suggest some means of relief
You are too too good cried I greatly embarrassed but indeed
I know not what you mean
I see said he it is painful to you to speak suppose then
I endeavour to save you by guessing
Impossible impossible cried I eagerly no one living could ever guess ever suppose I stopped abruptly for I then recollected I was acknowledging something was to be guessed however he noticed not my mistake
At least let me try answered he mildly perhaps I may be a better diviner than you imagine if I guess every thing that is probable surely I must approach near the real reason Be honest then my love and speak without reservedoes not the country after so much gaiety so much variety does it not appear insipid and tiresome
No indeed I love it more than ever and more than ever do I wish
I had never never quitted it
Oh my child that I had not permitted the journey My judgment always opposed it but my resolution was not proof against persuasion
I blush indeed cried I to recollect my earnestnessbut I have been my own punisher
It is too late now answered he to reflect upon this subject let us endeavour to avoid repentance for the time to come and we shall not have erred without reaping some instruction Then seating himself and making me sit by him he continued I must now guess again perhaps you regret the loss of those friends you knew in townperhaps you miss their society and fear you may see them no moreperhaps Lord Orville
I could not keep my seat but rising hastily said Dear Sir ask me nothing morefor I have nothing to ownnothing to saymy gravity has been merely accidental and I can give no reason for it at allShall I fetch you another bookor will you have this again
For some minutes he was totally silent and I pretended to employ myself in looking for a book At last with a deep sigh I see said he I see but too plainly that though Evelina is returnedI have lost my child
No Sir no cried I inexpressibly shocked she is more yours than ever Without you the world would be a desert to her and life a burthenforgive her then andif you cancondescend to be once more the confidant of all her thoughts
How highly I value how greatly I wish for her confidence returned he she cannot but knowyet to extort to tear it from hermy justice my affection both revolt at the idea I am sorry that I was so earnest with youleave me my dear leave me and compose yourself we will meet again at tea
Do you then refuse to hear me
No but I abhor to compel you I have long seen that your mind has been ill at ease and mine has largely partaken of your concern I forbore to question you for I hoped that time and absence from whatever excited your uneasiness might best operate in silence but alas your affliction seems only to augmentyour health declinesyour look altersOh Evelina my aged heart bleeds to see the changebleeds to behold the darling it had cherished the prop it had reared for its support when bowed down by years and infirmities sinking itself under the pressure of internal griefstruggling to hide what it should seek to participateBut go my dear go to your own room we both want composure and we will talk of this matter some other time
Oh Sir cried I penetrated to the soul bid me not leave youthink me not so lost to feeling to gratitude
Not a word of that interrupted he it pains me you should think upon that subject pains me you should ever remember that you have not a natural an hereditary right to every thing within my power I meant not to affect you thusI hoped to have soothed youbut my anxiety betrayed me to an urgency that has distressed you Comfort yourself my love and doubt not but that time will stand your friend and all will end well
I burst into tears with difficulty had I so long restrained them for my heart while it glowed with tenderness and gratitude was oppressed with a sense of its own unworthiness You are all all goodness cried I in a voice scarce audible little as I deserveunable as I am to repay such kindnessyet my whole soul feelsthanks you for it
My dearest child cried he I cannot bear to see thy tearsfor my sake dry them such a sight is too much for me think of that Evelina and take comfort I charge thee
Say then cried I kneeling at his feet say then that you forgive me that you pardon my reservethat you will again suffer me to tell you my most secret thoughts and rely upon my promise never more to forfeit your confidencemy fathermy protectormy everhonouredeverlovedmy best and only friendsay you forgive your Evelina and she will study better to deserve your goodness
He raised he embraced me he called me his sole joy his only earthly hope and the child of his bosom He folded me to his heart and while I wept from the fulness of mine with words of sweetest kindness and consolation he soothed and tranquillised me
Dear to my remembrance will ever be that moment when banishing the reserve I had so foolishly planned and so painfully supported I was restored to the confidence of the best of men
When at length we were again quietly and composedly seated by each other and Mr Villars waited for the explanation I had begged him to hear I found myself extremely embarrassed how to introduce the subject which must lead to it He saw my distress and with a kind of benevolent pleasantry asked me if I would let him guess any more I assented in silence
Shall I then go back to where I left off
Ifif you pleaseI believe so said I stammering
Well then my love I think I was speaking of the regret it was natural you should feel upon quitting those from whom you had received civility and kindness with so little certainty of ever seeing them again or being able to return their good offices These are circumstances that afford but melancholy reflections to young minds and the affectionate disposition of my Evelina open to all social feelings must be hurt more than usual by such considerationsYou are silent my dear Shall I name those whom I think most worthy the regret I speak of We shall then see if our opinions coincide
Still I said nothing and he continued
In your London journal nobody appears in a more amiable a more respectable light than Lord Orville and perhaps
I knew what you would say cried I hastily and I have long feared
where your suspicions would fall but indeed Sir you are mistaken
I hate Lord Orvillehe is the last man in the world in whose favour
I should be prejudiced
I stopped for Mr Villars looked at me with such infinite surprise that my own warmth made me blush
You hate Lord Orville repeated he
I could make no answer but took from my pocketbook the letter and giving it to him See Sir said I how differently the same man can talk and write
He read it three times before he spoke and then said I am so much astonished that I know not what I read When had you this letter
I told him Again he read it and after considering its contents some time said I can form but one conjecture concerning this most extraordinary performance he must certainly have been intoxicated when he wrote it
Lord Orville intoxicated repeated I once I thought him a stranger to all intemperancebut it is very possible for I can believe any thing now
That a man who had behaved with so strict a regard to delicacy continued Mr Villars and who as far as occasion had allowed manifested sentiments the most honourable should thus insolently thus wantonly insult a modest young woman in his perfect senses I cannot think possible But my dear you should have inclosed this letter in an empty cover and have returned it to him again such a resentment would at once have become your character and have given him an opportunity in some measure of clearing his own He could not well have read this letter the next morning without being sensible of the impropriety of having written it
Oh Maria why had I not this thought I might then have received some apology the mortification would then have been his not mine It is true he could not have reinstated himself so highly in my opinion as I had once ignorantly placed him since the conviction of such intemperance would have levelled him with the rest of his imperfect race yet my humbled pride might have been consoled by his acknowledgments
But why should I allow myself to be humbled by a man who can suffer his reason to be thus abjectly debased when I am exalted by one who knows no vice and scarcely a failing but by hearsay To think of his kindness and reflect upon his praises might animate and comfort me even in the midst of affliction Your indignation said he is the result of virtue you fancied Lord Orville was without faulthe had the appearance of infinite worthiness and you supposed his character accorded with appearance guileless yourself how could you prepare against the duplicity of another Your disappointment has but been proportioned to your expectations and you have chiefly owed its severity to the innocence which hid its approach
I will bid these words dwell ever in my memory and they shall cheer comfort and enliven me This conversation though extremely affecting to me at the time it passed has relieved my mind from much anxiety Concealment my dear Maria is the foe of tranquillity however I may err in future I will never be disingenuous in acknowledging my errors To you and to Mr Villars I vow an unremitting confidence
And yet though I am more at ease I am far from well I have been some time writing this letter but I hope I shall send you soon a more cheerful one
Adieu my sweet friend I intreat you not to acquaint even your dear mother with this affair Lord Orville is a favourite with her and why should I publish that he deserves not that honour
LETTER LXI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Bristol Hotwells August 28th
YOU will be again surprised my dear Maria at seeing whence I date my letter but I have been very ill and Mr Villars was so much alarmed that he not only insisted upon my accompanying Mrs Selwyn hither but earnestly desired she would hasten her intended journey
We travelled very slowly and I did not find myself so much fatigued as I expected We are situated upon a most delightful spot the prospect is beautiful the air pure and the weather very favourable to invalids I am already better and I doubt not but I shall soon be well as well in regard to mere health as I wish to be
I cannot express the reluctance with which I parted from my revered Mr Villars it was not like that parting which last April preceded my journey to Howard Grove when all expectation and hope though I wept I rejoiced and though I sincerely grieved to leave him I yet wished to be gone the sorrow I now felt was unmixed with any livelier sensation expectation was vanished and hope I had none All that I held most dear upon earth I quitted and that upon an errand to the success of which I was totally indifferent the reestablishment of my health Had it been to have seen my sweet Maria or her dear mother I should not have repined
Mrs Selwyn is very kind and attentive to me She is extremely clever her understanding indeed may be called masculine but unfortunately her manners deserve the same epithet for in studying to acquire the knowledge of the other sex she has lost all the softness of her own In regard to myself however as I have neither courage nor inclination to argue with her I have never been personally hurt at her want of gentleness a virtue which nevertheless seems so essential a part of the female character that I find myself more awkward and less at ease with a woman who wants it than I do with a man She is not a favourite with Mr Villars who has often been disgusted at her unmerciful propensity to satire but his anxiety that I should try the effect of the Bristol waters overcame his dislike of committing me to her care Mrs Clinton is also here so that I shall be as well attended as his utmost partiality could desire
I will continue to write to you my dear Miss Mirvan with as much constancy as if I had no other correspondent though during my absence from Berry Hill my letters may perhaps be shortened on account of the minuteness of the journal which I must write to my beloved Mr Villars but you who know his expectations and how many ties bind me to fulfil them will I am sure rather excuse any omission to yourself than any negligence to him
LETTER LXII
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Bristol Hotwells Sept 12th
THE first fortnight that I passed here was so quiet so serene that it gave me reason to expect a settled calm during my stay but if I may now judge of the time to come by the present state of my mind the calm will be succeeded by a storm of which I dread the violence
This morning in my way to the pumproom with Mrs Selwyn we were both very much incommoded by three gentlemen who were sauntering by the side of the Avon laughing and talking very loud and lounging so disagreeably that we knew not how to pass them They all three fixed their eyes very boldly upon me alternately looking under my hat and whispering one another Mrs Selwyn assumed an air of uncommon sternness and said You will please gentlemen either to proceed yourselves or to suffer us
Oh Maam cried one of them we will suffer you with the greatest pleasure in life
You will suffer us both answered she or I am much mistaken you had better therefore make way quietly for I should be sorry to give my servant the trouble of teaching you better manners
Her commanding air struck them yet they all chose to laugh and one of them wished the fellow would begin his lesson that he might have the pleasure of rolling him into the Avon while another advancing to me with a freedom which made me start said By my soul I did not know youbut I am sure I cannot be mistakenhad not I the honour of seeing you once at the Pantheon
I then recollected the nobleman who at that place had so much embarrassed me I courtsied without speaking They all bowed and making though in a very easy manner an apology to Mrs Selwyn they suffered us to pass on but chose to accompany us
And where continued this Lord can you so long have hid yourself do you know I have been in search of you this age I could neither find you out nor hear of you not a creature could inform me what was become of you I cannot imagine where you could be immured I was at two or three public places every night in hopes of meeting you Pray did you leave town
Yes my Lord
So early in the seasonwhat could possibly induce you to go before the birthday
I had nothing my Lord to do with the birthday
By my soul all the women who had may rejoice you were away Have you been here any time
Not above a fortnight my Lord
A fortnighthow unlucky that I did not meet you sooner but I have had a run of ill luck ever since I came How long shall you stay
Indeed my Lord I dont know
Six weeks I hope for I shall wish the place at the devil when you go
Do you then flatter yourself my Lord said Mrs Selwyn who had hitherto listened in silent contempt that you shall see such a beautiful spot as this when you visit the dominions of the devil
Ha ha ha Faith my Lord said one of his companions who still walked with us though the other had taken leave the lady is rather hard upon you
Not at all answered Mrs Selwyn for as I cannot doubt but his Lordships rank and interest will secure him a place there it would be reflecting on his understanding to suppose he should not wish to enlarge and beautify his dwelling
Much as I was disgusted with this Lord I must own Mrs Selwyns severity rather surprised me but you who have so often observed it will not wonder she took so fair an opportunity of indulging her humour
As to places returned he totally unmoved I am so indifferent to them that the devil take me if I care which way I go objects indeed I am not so easy about and therefore I expect that those angels with whose beauty I am so much enraptured in this world will have the goodness to afford me some little consolation in the other
What my Lord cried Mrs Selwyn would you wish to degrade the habitation of your friend by admitting into it the insipid company of the upper regions
What do you do with yourself this evening said his Lordship turning to me
I shall be at home my Lord
O eproposwhere are you
Young ladies my Lord said Mrs Selwyn are no where
Prithee whispered his Lordship is that queer woman your mother
Good Heavens Sir what words for such a question
No my Lord
Your maiden aunt then
No
Whoever she is I wish she would mind her own affairs I dont know what the devil a woman lives for after thirty she is only in other folks way Shall you be at the assembly
I believe not my Lord
Nowhy then how in the world can you contrive to pass your time
In a manner which your Lordship will think very extraordinary cried Mrs Selwyn for the young lady reads
Ha ha ha Egad my Lord cried the facetious companion you are got into bad hands
You had better Maam answered he attack Jack Coverley here for you will make nothing of me
Of you my Lord cried she Heaven forbid I should ever entertain so idle an expectation I only talk like a silly woman for the sake of talking but I have by no means so low an opinion of your Lordship as to suppose you vulnerable to censure
Do pray Maam cried he turn to Jack Coverley hes the very man for youhed be a wit himself if he was not too modest
Prithee my Lord be quiet returned the other if the lady is contented to bestow all her favours upon you why should you make such a point of my going snacks
Dont be apprehensive gentlemen said Mrs Selwyn drily I am not romanticI have not the least design of doing good to either of you
Have not you been ill since I saw you said his Lordship again addressing himself to me
Yes my Lord
I thought so you are paler than you was and I suppose thats the reason I did not recollect you sooner
Has not your Lordship too much gallantry cried Mrs Selwyn to discover a young ladys illness by her looks
The devil a word can I speak for that woman said he in a low voice do prithee Jack take her in hand
Excuse me my Lord answered Mr Coverley
When shall I see you again continued his Lordship do you go to the pumproom every morning
No my Lord
Do you ride out
No my Lord
Just then we arrived at the pumproom and an end was put to our conversation if it is not an abuse of words to give such a term to a string of rude questions and free compliments
He had not opportunity to say much more to me as Mrs Selwyn joined a large party and I walked home between two ladies He had however the curiosity to see us to the door
Mrs Selwyn was very eager to know how I had made acquaintance with this nobleman whose manners so evidently announced the character of a confirmed libertine I could give her very little satisfaction as I was ignorant even of his name but in the afternoon Mr Ridgeway the apothecary gave us very ample information
As his person was easily described for he is remarkably tall Mr Ridgeway told us he was Lord Merton a nobleman who is but lately come to his title though he has already dissipated more than half his fortune a professed admirer of beauty but a man of most licentious character that among men his companions consisted chiefly of gamblers and jockeys and among women he was rarely admitted
Well Miss Anville said Mrs Selwyn I am glad I was not more civil to him You may depend upon me for keeping him at a distance
O Madam said Mr Ridgeway he may now be admitted any where for he is going to reform
Has he under that notion persuaded any fool to marry him
Not yet Madam but a marriage is expected to take place shortly it has been some time in agitation but the friends of the lady have obliged her to wait till she is of age however her brother who has chiefly opposed the match now that she is near being at her own disposal is tolerably quiet She is very pretty and will have a large fortune We expect her at the Wells every day
What is her name said Mrs Selwyn
Larpent answered he Lady Louisa Larpent sister of Lord Orville
Lord Orville repeated I all amazement
Yes Maam his Lordship is coming with her I have had certain information They are to be at the Honourable Mrs Beaumonts She is a relation of my Lords and has a very fine house upon Clifton Hill
His Lordship is coming with her Good God what an emotion did those words give me How strange my dear Sir that just at this time he should visit Bristol It will be impossible for me to avoid seeing him as Mrs Selwyn is very well acquainted with Mrs Beaumont Indeed I have had an escape in not being under the same roof with him for Mrs Beaumont invited us to her house immediately upon our arrival but the inconvenience of being so distant from the pumproom made Mrs Selwyn decline her civility
Oh that the first meeting were overor that I could quit Bristol without seeing himinexpressibly do I dread an interview Should the same impertinent freedom be expressed by his looks which dictated this cruel letter I shall not know how to endure either him or myself Had I but returned it I should be easier because my sentiments of it would then be known to him but now he can only gather them from my behaviour and I tremble lest he should mistake my indignation for confusionlest he should misconstrue my reserve into embarrassmentfor how my dearest Sir how shall I be able totally to divest myself of the respect with which I have been used to think of himthe pleasure with which I have been used to see him
Surely he as well as I must recollect the letter at the moment of our meeting and he will probably mean to gather my thoughts of it from my looksoh that they could but convey to him my real detestation of impertinence and vanity then would he see how much he had mistaken my disposition when he imagined them my due
There was a time when the very idea that such a man as Lord Merton should ever be connected with Lord Orville would have both surprised and shocked me and even yet I am pleased to hear of his repugnance to the marriage
But how strange that a man of so abandoned a character should be the choice of a sister of Lord Orville and how strange that almost at the moment of the union he should be so importunate in gallantry to another woman What a world is this we live in how corrupt how degenerate well might I be contented to see no more of it If I find that the eyes of Lord Orville agree with his penI shall then think that of all mankind the only virtuous individual resides at Berry Hill
LETTER LXIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Bristol Hotwells Sept 16th
OH Sir Lord Orville is still himself still what from the moment I beheld I believed him to beall that is amiable in man and your happy Evelina restored at once to spirits and tranquillity is no longer sunk in her own opinion nor discontented with the worldno longer with dejected eyes sees the prospect of passing her future days in sadness doubt and suspicionwith revived courage she now looks forward and expects to meet with goodness even among mankindthough still she feels as strongly as ever the folly of hoping in any second instance to meet with perfection
Your conjecture was certainly right Lord Orville when he wrote that letter could not be in his senses Oh that intemperance should have power to degrade so low a man so noble
This morning I accompanied Mrs Selwyn to Clifton Hill where beautifully situated is the house of Mrs Beaumont Most uncomfortable were my feelings during our walk which was very slow for the agitation of my mind made me more than usually sensible how weak I still continue As we entered the house I summoned all my resolution to my aid determined rather to die than give Lord Orville reason to attribute my weakness to a wrong cause I was happily relieved from my perturbation when I saw Mrs Beaumont was alone We sat with her for I believe an hour without interruption and then we saw a phaeton drive up to the gate and a lady and gentleman alight from it
They entered the parlour with the ease of people who were at home The gentleman I soon saw was Lord Merton he came shuffling into the room with his boots on and his whip in his hand and having made something like a bow to Mrs Beaumont he turned towards me His surprise was very evident but he took no manner of notice of me He waited I believe to discover first what chance had brought me to that house where he did not look much rejoiced at meeting me He seated himself very quietly at the window without speaking to any body
Mean time the lady who seemed very young hobbling rather than walking into the room made a passing courtsy to Mrs Beaumont saying How are you Maam and then without noticing any body else with an air of languor she flung herself upon a sofa protesting in a most affected voice and speaking so softly she could hardly be heard that she was fatigued to death Really Maam the roads are so monstrous dustyyou cant imagine how troublesome the dust is to ones eyesand the sun too is monstrous disagreeableI dare say I shall be so tanned I shant be fit to be seen this age Indeed my Lord I wont go out with you any more for you dont care where you take one
Upon my honour said Lord Merton I took you the pleasantest ride in England the fault was in the sun not me
Your Lordship is in the right said Mrs Selwyn to transfer the fault to the sun because it has so many excellencies to counterbalance partial inconveniences that a little blame will not injure that in our estimation
Lord Merton looked by no means delighted at this attack which I believe she would not so readily have made but to revenge his neglect of us
Did you meet your brother Lady Louisa said Mrs Beaumont
No Maam Is he rode out this morning
I then found what I had before suspected that this lady was Lord Orvilles sister how strange that such near relations should be so different to each other There is indeed some resemblance in their features but in their manners not the least
Yes answered Mrs Beaumont and I believe he wished to see you
My Lord drove so monstrous fast said Lady Louisa that perhaps we passed him He frightened me out of my senses I declare my head is quite giddy Do you know Maam we have done nothing but quarrel all the morningYou cant think how Ive scolded have not I my Lord and she smiled expressively at Lord Merton
You have been as you always are said he twisting his whip with his fingers all sweetness
O fie my Lord cried she I know you dont think so I know you think me very illnatureddont you my Lord
No upon my honourhow can your Ladyship ask such a question Pray how goes time my watch stands
It is almost three answered Mrs Beaumont
Lord Maam you frighten me cried Lady Louisa and then turning to Lord Merton why now you wicked creature you did you not tell me it was but one
Mrs Selwyn then rose to take leave but Mrs Beaumont asked if she would look at the shrubbery I should like it much answered she but that I fear to fatigue Miss Anville
Lady Louisa then raising her head from her hand on which it had leant turned round to look at me and having fully satisfied her curiosity without any regard to the confusion it gave me turned about and again leaning on her hand took no further notice of me
I declared myself very able to walk and begged that I might accompany them What say you Lady Louisa cried Mrs Beaumont to a stroll in the garden
Me MaamI declare I cant stir a step the heat is so excessive it would kill me Im half dead with it already besides I shall have no time to dress Will any body be here today Maam
I believe not unless Lord Merton will favour us with his company
With great pleasure Madam
Well I declare you dont deserve to be asked cried Lady Louisa you wicked creature youI must tell you one thing Maamyou cant think how abominable he was do you know we met Mr Lovel in his new phaeton and my Lord was so cruel as to drive against itwe really flew I declare I could not breathe Upon my word my Lord Ill never trust myself with you againI wont indeed
We then went into the garden leaving them to discuss the point at their leisure
Do you remember a pretty but affected young lady I mentioned to have seen in Lord Orvilles party at the Pantheon How little did I then imagine her to be his sister yet Lady Louisa Larpent is the very person I can now account for the piqued manner of her speaking to Lord Merton that evening and I can now account for the air of displeasure with which Lord Orville marked the undue attention of his future brotherinlaw to me
We had not walked long ere at a distance I perceived Lord Orville who seemed just dismounted from his horse enter the garden All my perturbation returned at the sight of himyet I endeavoured to repress every feeling but resentment As he approached us he bowed to the whole party but I turned away my head to avoid taking any share in his civility Addressing himself immediately to Mrs Beaumont he was beginning to enquire after his sister but upon seeing my face he suddenly exclaimed Miss Anville and then he advanced and made his compliments to menot with an air of vanity or impertinence nor yet with a look of consciousness or shamebut with a countenance open manly and charmingwith a smile that indicated pleasure and eyes that sparkled with delighton my side was all that consciousness for by him I really believe the letter was at that moment entirely forgotten
With what politeness did he address me with what sweetness did he look at me the very tone of his voice seemed flattering he congratulated himself upon his good fortune in meeting with mehoped I should spend some time in Bristol and enquired even with anxiety enquired if my health was the cause of my journey in which case his satisfaction would be converted into apprehension
Yet struck as I was with his manner and charmed to find him such as he was wont to be imagine not my dear Sir that I forgot the resentment I owe him or the cause he has given me of displeasure no my behaviour was such as I hope had you seen you would not have disapproved I was grave and distant I scarce looked at him when he spoke or answered him when he was silent
As he must certainly observe this alteration in my conduct I think it could not fail making him both recollect and repent the provocation he had so causelessly given me for surely he was not so wholly lost to reason as to be now ignorant he had ever offended me
The moment that without absolute rudeness I was able I turned entirely from him and asked Mrs Selwyn if we should not be late home How Lord Orville looked I know not for I avoided meeting his eyes but he did not speak another word as we proceeded to the garden gate Indeed I believe my abruptness surprised him for he did not seem to expect I had so much spirit And to own the truth convinced as I was of the propriety nay necessity of showing my displeasure I yet almost hated myself for receiving his politeness so ungraciously
When we were taking leave my eyes accidentally meeting his I could not but observe that his gravity equalled my own for it had entirely taken place of the smiles and good humour with which he had met me
I am afraid this young lady said Mrs Beaumont is too weak for another long walk till she is again rested
If the ladies will trust to my driving said Lord Orville and are not afraid of a phaeton mine shall be ready in a moment
You are very good my Lord said Mrs Selwyn but my will is yet unsigned and I dont choose to venture in a phaeton with a young man while that is the case
O cried Mrs Beaumont you need not be afraid of my Lord Orville for he is remarkably careful
Well Miss Anville answered she what say you
Indeed cried I I had much rather walk But then looking at Lord Orville I perceived in his face a surprise so serious at my abrupt refusal that I could not forbear adding for I should be sorry to occasion so much trouble
Lord Orville brightening at these words came forward and pressed his offer in a manner not to be deniedso the phaeton was ordered And indeed my dear SirI know not how it wasbut from that moment my coldness and reserve insensibly wore away You must not be angryit was my intention nay my endeavour to support them with firmness but when I formed the plan I thought only of the letternot of Lord Orvilleand how is it possible for resentmen to subsist without provocation yet believe me my dearest Sir had he sustained the part he began to act when he wrote this evertoberegretted letter your Evelina would have not forfeited her title to your esteem by contentedly submitting to be treated with indignity
We continued in the garden till the phaeton was ready When we parted from Mrs Beaumont she repeated her invitation to Mrs Selwyn to accept an apartment in her house but the reason I have already mentioned made it be again declined
Lord Orville drove very slow and so cautiously that notwithstanding the height of the phaeton fear would have been ridiculous I supported no part in the conversation but Mrs Selwyn extremely well supplied the place of two Lord Orville himself did not speak much but the excellent sense and refined goodbreeding which accompany every word he utters give value and weight to whatever he says
I suppose my Lord said Mrs Selwyn when we stopped at our lodgings you would have been extremely confused had we met any gentlemen who have the honour of knowing you
If I had answered he gallantly it would have been from mere compassion at their envy
No my Lord answered she it would have been from mere shame that in an age so daring you alone should be such a coward as to forbear to frighten women
O cried he laughing when a man is in a fright for himself the ladies cannot but be in security for you have not had half the apprehension for the safety of your persons that I have for that of my heart He then alighted handed us out took leave and again mounting the phaeton was out of sight in a minute
Certainly said Mrs Selwyn when he was gone there must have been some mistake in the birth of that young man he was undoubtedly designed for the last age for he is really polite
And now my dear Sir do not you think according to the present situation of affairs I may give up my resentment without imprudence or impropriety I hope you will not blame me Indeed had you like me seen his respectful behaviour you would have been convinced of the impracticability of supporting any further indignation
LETTER LXIV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Bristol Hotwells Sept 19th
YESTERDAY morning Mrs Selwyn received a card from Mrs Beaumont to ask her to dine with her today and another to the same purpose came to me The invitation was accepted and we are but just arrived from Clifton Hill
We found Mrs Beaumont alone in the parlour I will write you the character of that lady in the words of our satirical friend Mrs Selwyn She is an absolute Court Calendar bigot for chancing herself to be born of a noble and ancient family she thinks proper to be of opinion that birth and virtue are one and the same thing She has some good qualities but they rather originate from pride than principle as she piques herself upon being too highborn to be capable of an unworthy action and thinks it incumbent upon her to support the dignity of her ancestry Fortunately for the world in general she has taken it into her head that condescension is the most distinguishing virtue of high life so that the same pride of family which renders others imperious is with her the motive of affability But her civility is too formal to be comfortable and too mechanical to be flattering That she does me the honour of so much notice is merely owing to an accident which I am sure is very painful to her remembrance for it so happened that I once did her some service in regard to an apartment at Southampton and I have since been informed that at the time she accepted my assistance she thought I was a woman of quality and I make no doubt but she was miserable when she discovered me to be a mere country gentlewoman however her nice notions of decorum have made her load me with favours ever since But I am not much flattered by her civilities as I am convinced I owe them neither to attachment nor gratitude but solely to a desire of cancelling an obligation which she cannot brook being under to one whose name is no where to be found in the Court Calendar
You well know my dear Sir the delight this lady takes in giving way to her satirical humour
Mrs Beaumont received us very graciously though she some what distressed me by the questions she asked concerning my familysuch as Whether I was related to the Anvilles in the NorthWhether some of my name did not live in Lincolnshire and many other inquiries which much embarrassed me
The conversation next turned upon the intended marriage in her family She treated the subject with reserve but it was evident she disapproved Lady Louisas choice She spoke in terms of the highest esteem of Lord Orville calling him in Marmontels words Un jeune homme comme il y en a peu
I did not think this conversation very agreeably interrupted by the entrance of Mr Lovel Indeed I am heartily sorry he is now at the Hot Wells He made his compliments with the most obsequious respect to Mrs Beaumont but took no sort of notice of any other person
In a few minutes Lady Louisa Larpent made her appearance The same manners prevailed for courtsying with I hope you are well Maam to Mrs Beaumont she passed straight forward to her seat on the sofa where leaning her head on her hand she cast her languishing eyes round the room with a vacant stare as if determined though she looked not to see who was in it
Mr Lovel presently approaching her with reverence the most profound hoped her Ladyship was not indisposed
Mr Lovel cried she raising her head I declare I did not see you have you been here long
By my watch Madam said he only five minutesbut by your
Ladyships absence as many hours
O now I think of it cried she I am very angry with youso go along do for I shant speak to you all day
Heaven forbid your Laships displeasure should last so long in such cruel circumstances a day would seem an age But in what have I been so unfortunate as to offend
O you half killed me the other morning with terror I have not yet recovered from my fright How could you be so cruel as to drive your phaeton against my Lord Mertons
Pon honour Maam your Laship does me wrongit was all owing to the horsesthere was no curbing them I protest I suffered more than your Ladyship from the terror of alarming you
Just then entered Lord Merton stalking up to Mrs Beaumont to whom alone he bowed he hoped he had not made her wait and then advancing to Lady Louisa said in a careless manner How is your Ladyship this morning
Not well at all answered she I have been dying with the headache ever since I got up
Indeed cried he with a countenance wholly unmoved I am very unhappy to hear it But should not your Ladyship have some advice
I am quite sick of advice answered she Mr Ridgeway has but just left mebut he has done me no good Nobody here knows what is the matter with me yet they all see how indifferent I am
Your Ladyships constitution said Mr Lovel is infinitely delicate
Indeed it is cried she in a low voice I am nerve all over
I am glad however said Lord Merton that you did not take the air this morning for Coverley has been driving against me as if he was mad he has got two of the finest spirited horses I ever saw
Pray my Lord cried she why did not you bring Mr Coverley with you hes a droll creature I like him monstrously
Why he promised to be here as soon as me I suppose hell come before dinners over
In the midst of this trifling conversation Lord Orville made his appearance O how different was his address how superior did he look and move to all about him Having paid his respects to Mrs Beaumont and then to Mrs Selwyn he came up to me and said I hope Miss Anville has not suffered from the fatigue of Monday morning Then turning to Lady Louisa who seemed rather surprised at his speaking to me he added Give me leave sister to introduce Miss Anville to you
Lady Louisa halfrising said very coldly that she should be glad of the honour of knowing me and then abruptly turning to Lord Merton and Mr Lovel continued in a halfwhisper her conversation
For my part I had risen and courtsied and now feeling very foolish I seated myself again first I blushed at the unexpected politeness of Lord Orville and immediately afterwards at the contemptuous failure of it in his sister How can that young lady see her brother so universally admired for his manners and deportment and yet be so unamiably opposite to him in hers but while his mind enlarged and noble rises superior to the little prejudices of rank hers feeble and unsteady sinks beneath their influence
Lord Orville I am sure was hurt and displeased he bit his lips and turning from her addressed himself wholly to me till we were summoned to dinner Do you think I was not grateful for his attention yes indeed and every angry idea I had entertained was totally obliterated
As we were seating ourselves at the table Mr Coverley came into the room he made a thousand apologies in a breath for being so late but said he had been retarded by a little accident for that he had overturned his phaeton and broke it all to pieces Lady Louisa screamed at this intelligence and looking at Lord Merton declared she would never go into a phaeton again
O cried he never mind Jack Coverley for he does not know how to drive
My Lord cried Mr Coverley Ill drive against you for a thousand pounds
Done returned the other name your day and well each choose a judge
The sooner the better cried Mr Coverley tomorrow if the carriage can be repaired
These enterprises said Mrs Selwyn are very proper for men of rank since tis a million to one but both parties will be incapacitated for any better employment
For Heavens sake cried Lady Louisa changing colour dont talk so shockingly Pray my Lord pray Mr Coverley dont alarm me in this manner
Compose yourself Lady Louisa said Mrs Beaumont the gentlemen will think better of the scheme they are neither of them in earnest
The very mention of such a scheme said Lady Louisa taking out her salts makes me tremble all over Indeed my Lord you have frightened me to death I shant eat a morsel of dinner
Permit me said Lord Orville to propose some other subject for the present and we will discuss this matter another time
Pray brother excuse me my Lord must give me his word to drop the projectfor I declare it has made me sick as death
To compromise the matter said Lord Orville suppose if both parties are unwilling to give up the bet that to make the ladies easy we change its object to something less dangerous
This proposal was so strongly seconded by all the party that both Lord Merton and Mr Coverley were obliged to comply with it and it was then agreed that the affair should be finally settled in the afternoon
I shall now be entirely out of conceit with phaetons again said
Mrs Selwyn though Lord Orville had almost reconciled me to them
My Lord Orville cried the witty Mr Coverley why my Lord Orville is as carefulegad as careful as an old woman Why Id drive a onehorse cart against my Lords phaeton for a hundred guineas
This sally occasioned much laughter for Mr Coverley I find is regarded as a man of infinite humour
Perhaps Sir said Mrs Selwyn you have not discovered the reason my Lord Orville is so careful
Why no Maam I must own I never heard any particular reason for it
Why then Sir Ill tell it you and I believe you will confess it to be very particular his Lordships friends are not yet tired of him
Lord Orville laughed and bowed Mr Coverley a little confused turned to Lord Merton and said No foul play my Lord I remember your Lordship recommended me to the notice of this lady the other morning and egad I believe you have been doing me the same office today
Give you joy Jack cried Lord Merton with a loud laugh
After this the conversation turned wholly upon eating a subject which was discussed with the utmost delight and had I not known they were men of rank and fashion I should have imagined that Lord Merton Mr Lovel and Mr Coverley had all been professed cooks for they displayed so much knowledge of sauces and madedishes and of the various methods of dressing the same things that I am persuaded they must have given much time and much study to make themselves such adepts in this art It would be very difficult to determine whether they were most to be distinguished as gluttons or epicures for they were at once dainty and voracious understood the right and the wrong of every dish and alike emptied the one and the other I should have been quite sick of their remarks had I not been entertained by seeing that Lord Orville who I am sure was equally disgusted not only read my sentiments but by his countenance communicated to me his own
When dinner was over Mrs Beaumont recommended the gentlemen to the care of Lord Orville and then attended the ladies to the drawingroom
The conversation till teatime was extremely insipid Mrs Selwyn reserved herself for the gentlemen Mrs Beaumont was grave and Lady Louisa languid
But at tea every body revived we were joined by the gentlemen and gaiety took the place of dullness
Since I as Mr Lovel says am Nobody I seated myself quietly at a window and not very near to any body Lord Merton Mr Coverley and Mr Lovel severally passed me without notice and surrounded the chair of Lady Louisa Larpent I must own I was rather piqued at the behaviour of Mr Lovel as he had formerly known me It is true I most sincerely despise his foppery yet I should be grieved to meet with contempt from any body But I was by no means sorry to find that Lord Merton was determined not to know me before Lady Louisa as his neglect relieved me from much embarrassment As to Mr Coverley his attention or disregard were equally indifferent to me Yet altogether I feel extremely uncomfortable in finding myself considered in a light very inferior to the rest of the company
But when Lord Orville appeared the scene changed he came up stairs last and seeing me sit alone not only spoke to me directly but drew a chair next mine and honoured me with his entire attention
He enquired very particularly after my health and hoped I had already found benefit from the Bristol air How little did I imagine added he when I had last the pleasure of seeing you in town that ill health would in so short a time have brought you hither I am ashamed of myself for the satisfaction I feel at seeing youyet how can I help it
He then enquired after the Mirvan family and spoke of Mrs Mirvan in terms of most just praise She is gentle and amiable said he a true feminine character
Yes indeed answered I and her sweet daughter to say every thing of her at once is just the daughter such a mother deserves
I am glad of it said he for both their sakes as such near relations must always reflect credit or disgrace on each other
After this he began to speak of the beauties of Clifton but in a few moments he was interrupted by a call from the company to discuss the affair of the wager Lord Merton and Mr Coverley though they had been discoursing upon the subject some time could not fix upon the thing that satisfied them both
When they asked the assistance of Lord Orville he proposed that every body present should vote something and that the two gentlemen should draw lots which from the several votes should decide the bet
We must then begin with the ladies said Lord Orville and applied to Mrs Selwyn
With all my heart answered she with her usual readiness and since the gentlemen are not allowed to risk their necks suppose we decide the bet by their heads
By our heads cried Mr Coverley Egad I dont understand you
I will then explain myself more fully As I doubt not but you are both excellent classics suppose for the good of your own memories and the entertainment and surprise of the company the thousand pounds should fall to the share of him who can repeat by heart the longest ode of Horace
Nobody could help laughing the two gentlemen applied to excepted who seemed each of them rather at a loss in what manner to receive this unexpected proposal At length Mr Coverley bowing low said Will your Lordship please to begin
Devil take me if I do answered he turning on his heel and stalking to the window
Come gentlemen said Mrs Selwyn why do you hesitate I am sure you cannot be afraid of a weak woman Besides if you should chance to be out Mr Lovel I dare say will have the goodness to assist you
The laugh now turned against Mr Lovel whose change of countenance manifested no great pleasure at the transition
Me Madam said he colouring no really I must beg to be excused
Why so Sir
Why so MaamWhy reallyas to thatpon honour Maam you are rathera little severefor how is it possible for a man who is in the house to study the classics I assure you Maam with an affected shrug I find quite business enough for my poor head in studying politics
But did you study politics at school and at the university
At the university repeated he with an embarrassed look why as to that Maamno I cant say I did but then what with ridingand andand so forthreally one has not much time even at the university for mere reading
But to be sure Sir you have read the classics
O dear yes Maamvery oftenbut not verynot very lately
Which of the Odes do you recommend to these gentlemen to begin with
Which of the OdesReally Maam as to that I have no very particular choicefor to own the truth that Horace was never a very great favourite with me
In truth I believe you said Mrs Selwyn very drily
Lord Merton again advancing into the circle with a nod and a laugh said Give you joy Lovel
Lord Orville next applied to Mrs Beaumont for her vote
It would very agreeably remind me of past times said she when bowing was in fashion if the bet was to depend upon the best made bow
Egad my Lord cried Mr Coverley there I should beat you hollow for your Lordship never bows at all
And pray Sir do you said Mrs Selwyn
Do I Maam cried he why only see
I protest cried she I should have taken that for a shrug if you had not told me twas a bow
My lord cried Mr Coverley lets practise and then most ridiculously they pranced about the room making bows
We must now said Lord Orville turning to me call upon Miss
Anville
O no my Lord cried I indeed I have nothing to propose He would not however be refused but urged me so much to say something that at last not to make him wait any longer I ventured to propose an extempore couplet upon some given subject Mr Coverley instantly made me a bow or according to Mrs Selwyn a shrug crying Thank you Maam egad thats my fortewhy my Lord the Fates seem against you
Lady Louisa was then applied to and every body seemed eager to hear her opinion I dont know what to say I declare cried she affectedly cant you pass me
By no means said Lord Merton
Is it possible your Ladyship can make so cruel a request said
Mr Lovel
Egad cried Mr Coverley if your Ladyship does not help us in this dilemma we shall be forced to return to our phaetons
Oh cried Lady Louisa screaming you frightful creature you how can you be so abominable
I believe this trifling lasted near half an hour when at length every body being tired it was given up and she said she would consider against another time
Lord Orville now called upon Mr Lovel who after about ten minutes deliberation proposed with a most important face to determine the wager by who should draw the longest straw
I had much difficulty to forbear laughing at this unmeaning scheme but saw to my great surprise not the least change of countenance in any other person and since we came home Mrs Selwyn has informed me that to draw straws is a fashion of betting by no means uncommon Good God my dear Sir does it not seem as if money were of no value or service since those who possess squander it away in a manner so infinitely absurd
It now only remained for Lord Orville to speak and the attention of the company showed the expectations he had raised yet I believe they by no means prevented his proposal from being heard with amazement for it was no other than that the money should be his due who according to the opinion of the judges should bring the worthiest object with whom to share it
They all stared without speaking Indeed I believe every one for a moment at least experienced something like shame from having either proposed or countenanced an extravagance so useless and frivolous For my part I was so much struck and affected by a rebuke so noble to these spendthrifts that I felt my eyes filled with tears
The short silence and momentary reflection into which the company was surprised Mr Coverley was the first to dispel by saying Egad my Lord your Lordship has a most remarkable odd way of taking things
Faith said the incorrigible Lord Merton if this scheme takes I shall fix upon my Swiss to share with me for I dont know a worthier fellow breathing
After a few more of these attempts at wit the two gentlemen agreed that they would settle the affair the next morning
The conversation then took a different turn but I did not give it sufficient attention to write any account of it Not long after Lord Orville resuming his seat near mine said Why is Miss Anville so thoughtful
I am sorry my Lord said I to consider myself among those who have so justly incurred your censure
My censureyou amaze me
Indeed my Lord you have made me quite ashamed of myself for having given my vote so foolishly when an opportunity offered if like your Lordship I had had the sense to use it of showing some humanity
You treat this too seriously said he smiling and I hardly know if you do not now mean a rebuke to me
To you my Lord
Nay who are most deserving of it those who adapt their conversation to the company or those who affect to be superior to it
O my Lord who else would do you so little justice
I flatter myself answered he that in fact your opinion and mine in this point are the same though you condescended to comply with the humour of the company It is for me therefore to apologize for so unseasonable a gravity which but for the particular interest that I now take in the affairs of Lord Merton I should not have been so officious to display
Such a compliment as this could not fail to reconcile me to myself and with revived spirits I entered into a conversation which he supported with me till Mrs Selwyns carriage was announced and we returned home
During our ride Mrs Selwyn very much surprised me by asking if I thought my health would now permit me to give up my morning walks to the pumproom for the purpose of spending a week at Clifton for this poor Mrs Beaumont added she is so eager to have a discharge in full of her debt to me that out of mere compassion I am induced to listen to her Besides she has always a house full of people and though they are chiefly fools and coxcombs yet there is some pleasure in cutting them up
I begged I might not by any means prevent her following her inclination as my health was now very well established And so my dear Sir tomorrow we are to be actually the guests of Mrs Beaumont
I am not much delighted at this scheme for greatly as I am flattered by the attention of Lord Orville it is not very comfortable to be neglected by every body else Besides as I am sure I owe the particularity of his civility to a generous feeling for my situation I cannot expect him to support it so long as a week
How often do I wish since I am absent from you that I was under the protection of Mrs Mirvan It is true Mrs Selwyn is very obliging and in every respect treats me as an equal but she is contented with behaving well herself and does not with a distinguishing politeness raise and support me with others Yet I mean not to blame her for I know she is sincerely my friend but the fact is she is herself so much occupied in conversation when in company that she has neither leisure nor thought to attend to the silent
Well I must take my chance But I knew not till now how requisite are birth and fortune to the attainment of respect and civility
LETTER LXV
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Clifton Sept 20th
HERE I am my dear Sir under the same roof and an inmate of the same house as Lord Orville Indeed if this were not the case my situation would be very disagreeable as you will easily believe when I tell you the light in which I am generally considered
My dear said Mrs Selwyn did you ever before meet with that egregious fop Lovel
I very readily satisfied her as to my acquaintance with him
O then said she I am the less surprised at his illnature since he has already injured you
I begged her to explain herself and then she told me that while
Lord Orville was speaking to me Lady Louisa said to Mr Lovel
Do you know who that is
Why Maam no pon honour answered he I cant absolutely say I do I only know she is a kind of a toadeater She made her first appearance in that capacity last spring when she attended Miss Mirvan a young lady of Kent
How cruel is it my dear Sir to be thus exposed to the impertinent suggestions of a man who is determined to do me ill offices Lady Louisa may well despise a toadeater but thank Heaven her brother has not heard or does not credit the mortifying appellation Mrs Selwyn said she would advise me to pay my court to this Mr Lovel for said she though he is malicious he is fashionable and may do you some harm in the great world But I should disdain myself as much as I do him were I capable of such duplicity as to flatter a man whom I scorn and despise
We were received by Mrs Beaumont with great civility and by Lord Orville with something more As to Lady Louisa she scarcely perceived that we were in the room
There has been company here all day part of which I have spent most happily for after tea when the ladies played at cards Lord Orville who does not and I who cannot play were consequently at our own disposal and then his Lordship entered into a conversation with me which lasted till suppertime
Almost insensibly I find the constraint the reserve I have been wont to feel in his presence wear away the politeness the sweetness with which he speaks to me restore all my natural cheerfulness and make me almost as easy as he is himselfand the more so as if I may judge by his looks I am rather raised than sunk of late in his opinion
I asked him how the bet was at last to be decided He told me that to his great satisfaction the parties had been prevailed upon to lower the sum from one thousand to one hundred pounds and that they had agreed it should be determined by a race between two old women one of whom was to be chosen by each side and both were to be proved more than eighty years of age though in other respects strong and healthy as possible
When I expressed my surprise at this extraordinary method of spending so much money I am charmed said he at the novelty of meeting with one so unhackneyed in the world as not to be yet influenced by custom to forget the use of reason: for certain it is that the prevalence of fashion makes the greatest absurdities pass uncensured and the mind naturally accommodates itself even to the most ridiculous improprieties if they occur frequently
I should have hoped said I that the humane proposal made yesterday by your Lordship would have had more effect
O cried he laughing I was so far from expecting any success that I shall think myself very fortunate if I escape the wit of Mr Coverley in a lampoon yet I spoke openly because I do not wish to conceal that I am no friend to gaming
After this he took up the New Bath Guide and read it with me till suppertime In our way down stairs Lady Louisa said I thought brother you were engaged this evening
Yes sister answered he and I have been engaged And he bowed to me with an air of gallantry that rather confused me Sept 23rd
Almost insensibly have three days glided on since I wrote last and so serenely that but for your absence I could not have formed a wish My residence here is much happier than I had dared expect The attention with which Lord Orville honours me is as uniform as it is flattering and seems to result from a benevolence of heart that proves him as much a stranger to caprice as to pride for as his particular civilities arose from a generous resentment at seeing me neglected so will they I trust continue as long as I shall in any degree deserve them I am now not merely easy but even gay in his presence such is the effect of true politeness that it banishes all restraint and embarrassment When we walk out he condescends to be my companion and keeps by my side all the way we go When we read he marks the passages most worthy to be noticed draws out my sentiments and favours me with his own At table where he always sits next to me he obliges me by a thousand nameless attentions while the distinguishing goodbreeding with which he treats me prevents my repining at the visiblyfelt superiority of the rest of the company A thousand occasional meetings could not have brought us to that degree of social freedom which four days spent under the same roof have insensibly been productive of and as my only friend in this house Mrs Selwyn is too much engrossed in perpetual conversation to attend much to me Lord Orville seems to regard me as a helpless stranger and as such to think me entitled to his good offices and protection Indeed my dear Sir I have reason to hope that the depreciating opinion he formerly entertained of me is succeeded by one infinitely more partialIt may be that I flatter myself but yet his looks his attentions his desire of drawing me into conversation and his solicitude to oblige me all conspire to make me hope I do not In short my dearest Sir these last four happy days would repay me for months of sorrow and pain
LETTER LXVI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Clifton Sept 24th
THIS morning I came down stairs very early and supposing that the family would not assemble for some time I strolled out purposing to take a long walk in the manner I was wont to do at Berry Hill before breakfast but I had scarce shut the gardengate before I was met by a gentleman who immediately bowing to me I recollected to be the unhappy Mr Macartney Very much surprised I courtsied and stopped till he came up to me He was still in mourning but looked better than when I saw him last though he had the same air of melancholy which so much struck me at first sight of him
Addressing me with the utmost respect I am happy Madam said he to have met with you so soon I came to Bristol but yesterday and have had no small difficulty in tracing you to Clifton
Did you know then of my being here
I did Madam the sole motive of my journey was to see you I have been to Berry Hill and there I had my intelligence and at the same time the unwelcome information of your ill health
Good God Sirand can you possibly have taken so much trouble
Trouble O Madam could there be any to return you the moment I had the power my personal acknowledgments for your goodness
I then enquired after Madame Duval and the SnowHill family He told me they were all well and that Madame Duval proposed soon returning to Paris When I congratulated him on looking better It is yourself Madam said he you should congratulate for to your humanity alone it may now be owing that I exist at all He then told me that his affairs were now in a less desperate situation and that he hoped by the assistance of time and reason to accommodate his mind to a more cheerful submission to his fate The interest you so generously took in my affliction added he assures me you will not be displeased to hear of my better fortune I was therefore eager to acquaint you with it He then told me that his friend the moment he had received his letter quitted Paris and flew to give him his personal assistance and consolation With a heavy heart he acknowledged he accepted it but yet he added I have accepted it and therefore as bound equally by duty and honour my first step was to hasten to the benefactress of my distress and to return presenting me something in a paper the only part of my obligations that can be returned for the rest I have nothing but my gratitude to offer and must always be contented to consider myself her debtor
I congratulated him most sincerely upon his dawning prosperity but begged he would not deprive me of the pleasure of being his friend and declined receiving the money till his affairs were more settled
While this point was in agitation I heard Lord Orvilles voice inquiring of the gardener if he had seen me I immediately opened the garden gate and his Lordship advancing to me with quickness said Good God Miss Anville have you been out alone Breakfast has been ready some time and I have been round the garden in search of you
Your Lordship has been very good said I but I hope you have not waited
Not waited repeated he smiling Do you think we could sit down quietly to breakfast with the idea that you had run away from us But come offering to hand me if we do not return they will suppose I am run away too and they very naturally may as they know the attraction of the magnet that draws me
I will come my Lord said I rather embarrassed in two minutes Then turning to Mr Macartney with yet more embarrassment I wished him good morning
He advanced towards the garden with the paper still in his hand
No no cried I some other time
May I then Madam have the honour of seeing you again
I did not dare take the liberty of inviting any body to the house of Mrs Beaumont nor yet had I the presence of mind to make an excuse and therefore not knowing how to refuse him I said Perhaps you may be this way again tomorrow morningand I believe I shall walk out before breakfast
He bowed and went away while I turning again to Lord Orville saw his countenance so much altered that I was frightened at what I had so hastily said He did not again offer me his hand but walked silent and slow by my side Good Heaven thought I what may he not suppose from this adventure May he not by my desire of meeting Mr Macartney tomorrow imagine it was by design I walked out to meet him today Tormented by this apprehension I determined to avail myself of the freedom which his behaviour since I came hither has encouraged and since he would not ask any questions begin an explanation myself I therefore slackened my pace to gain time and then said Was not your Lordship surprised to see me speaking with a stranger
A stranger repeated he is it possible that gentleman can be a stranger to you
No my Lord said I stammering not to me but only it might lookhe might seem
No believe me said he with a forced smile I could never suppose
Miss Anville would make an appointment with a stranger
An appointment my Lord repeated I colouring violently
Pardon me Madam answered he but I thought I had heard one
I was so much confounded that I could not speak yet finding he walked quietly on I could not endure he should make his own interpretation of my silence and therefore as soon as I recovered from my surprise I said Indeed my Lord you are much mistaken Mr Macartney had particular business with meand I could notI knew not how to refuse seeing himbut indeed my LordI had nothe had not I stammered so terribly that I could not go on
I am very sorry said he gravely that I have been so unfortunate as to distress you but I should not have followed you had I not imagined you were merely walked out for the air
And so I was cried I eagerly indeed my Lord I was My meeting with Mr Macartney was quite accidental and if your Lordship thinks there is any impropriety in my seeing him tomorrow I am ready to give up that intention
If I think said he in a tone of surprise surely Miss Anville cannot leave the arbitration of a point so delicate to one who is ignorant of all the circumstances which attend it
If said I it was worth your Lordships time to hear themyou should not be ignorant of the circumstances which attend it
The sweetness of Miss Anvilles disposition said he in a softened voice I have long admired and the offer of a communication which does me so much honour is too grateful to me not to be eagerly caught at
Just then Mrs Selwyn opened the parlour window and our conversation ended I was rallied upon my passion for solitary walking but no questions were asked me
When breakfast was over I hoped to have had some opportunity of speaking with Lord Orville but Lord Merton and Mr Coverley came in and insisted up his opinion of the spot they had fixed upon for the old womens race The ladies declared they would be of the party and accordingly we all went
The race is to be run in Mrs Beaumonts garden the two gentlemen are as anxious as if their joint lives depended upon it They have at length fixed upon objects but have found great difficulty in persuading them to practise running in order to try their strength This grand affair is to be decided next Thursday
When we returned to the house the entrance of more company still prevented my having any conversation with Lord Orville I was very much chagrined as I knew he was engaged at the Hotwells in the afternoon Seeing therefore no probability of speaking to him before the time of my meeting Mr Macartney arrived I determined that rather than risk his ill opinion I would leave Mr Macartney to his own suggestions
Yet when I reflected upon his peculiar situation his poverty his sadness and more than all the rest the idea I knew he entertained of what he calls his obligations to me I could not resolve upon a breach of promise which might be attributed to causes of all the others the most offensive to one whom misfortune has made extremely suspicious of slights and contempt
After the most uneasy consideration I at length determined upon writing an excuse which would at once save me from either meeting or affronting him I therefore begged Mrs Selwyns leave to send her man to the Hotwells which she instantly granted and then I wrote the following note
To Mr Macartney
SIR
As it will not be in my power to walk out tomorrow morning
I would
by no means give you the trouble of coming to Clifton I hope
however to have the pleasure of seeing you before you quit
Bristol I am Sir your obedient servant EVELINA ANVILLE
I desired the servant to enquire at the pumproom where Mr Macartney lived and returned to the parlour
As soon as the company dispersed the ladies retired to dress I then unexpectedly found myself alone with Lord Orville who the moment I rose to follow Mrs Selwyn advanced to me and said Will Miss Anville pardon my impatience if I remind her of the promise she was so good as to make me this morning
I stopped and would have returned to my seat but before I had time the servants came to lay the cloth He retreated and went towards the window and while I was considering in what manner to begin I could not help asking myself what right I had to communicate the affairs of Mr Macartney and I doubted whether to clear myself from one act of imprudence I had not committed another
Distressed by this reflection I thought it best to quit the room and give myself some time for consideration before I spoke and therefore only saying I must hasten to dress I ran up stairs rather abruptly I own and so I fear Lord Orville must think Yet what could I do Unused to the situations in which I find myself and embarrassed by the slightest difficulties I seldom till too late discover how I ought to act
Just as we were all assembled to dinner Mrs Selwyns man coming into the parlour presented to me a letter and said I cant find out Mr Macartney Madam but the postoffice people will let you know if they hear of him
I was extremely ashamed of this public message and meeting the eyes of Lord Orville which were earnestly fixed on me my confusion redoubled and I knew not which way to look All dinnertime he was as silent as myself and the moment it was in my power I left the table and went to my own room Mrs Selwyn presently followed me and her questions obliged me to own almost all the particulars of my acquaintance with Mr Macartney in order to excuse my writing to him She said it was a most romantic affair and spoke her sentiments with great severity declaring that she had no doubt but he was an adventurer and an impostor
And now my dear Sir I am totally at a loss what I ought to do the more I reflect the more sensible I am of the utter impropriety nay treachery of revealing the story and publishing the misfortunes and poverty of Mr Macartney who has an undoubted right to my secrecy and discretion and whose letter charges me to regard his communication as sacredAnd yet the appearance of mysteryperhaps something worse which this affair must have to Lord Orvillehis seriousnessand the promise I have made him are inducements scarce to be resisted for trusting him with the openness he has reason to expect from me
I am equally distressed too whether or not I should see Mr Macartney tomorrow morning
Oh Sir could I now be enlightened by your counsel from what anxiety and perplexity should I be relieved
But nowI ought not to betray Mr Macartney and I will not forfeit a confidence which would never have been reposed in me but from a reliance upon my honour which I should blush to find myself unworthy of Desirous as I am of the good opinion of Lord Orville I will endeavour to act as if I was guided by your advice and making it my sole aim to deserve it leave to time and to fate my success or disappointment
Since I have formed this resolution my mind is more at ease But I will not finish my letter till the affair is decided
Sept 25th
I rose very early this morning and after a thousand different plans not being able to resolve upon giving poor Mr Macartney leave to suppose I neglected him I thought it incumbent upon me to keep my word since he had not received my letter I therefore determined to make my own apologies not to stay with him two minutes and to excuse myself from meeting him any more
Yet uncertain whether I was wrong or right it was with fear and trembling that I opened the gardengatejudge then of my feelings when the first object I saw was Lord Orvillehe too looked extremely disconcerted and said in a hesitating manner Pardon me MadamI did not intendI did not imagine you would have been here so soonoror I would not have comeAnd then with a hasty bow he passed me and proceeded to the garden
I was scarce able to stand so greatly did I feel myself shocked but upon my saying almost involuntarily Oh my Lordhe turned back and after a short pause said Did you speak to me Madam
I could not immediately answer I seemed choaked and was even forced to support myself by the gardengate
Lord Orville soon recovering his dignity said I know not how to apologize for being just now at this placeand I cannot immediatelyif ever clear myself from the imputation of impertinent curiosity to which I fear you will attribute it however at present I will only intreat your pardon without detaining you any longer Again he bowed and left me
For some moments I remained fixed to the same spot and in the same position immoveable as if I had been transformed to a stone My first impulse was to call him back and instantly tell him the whole affair but I checked this desire though I would have given the world to have indulged it something like pride aided what I thought due to Mr Macartney and I determined not only to keep his secret but to delay any sort of explanation till Lord Orville should condescend to request it
Slowly he walked and before he entered the house he looked back but hastily withdrew his eyes upon finding I observed him
Indeed my dear Sir you cannot easily imagine a situation more uncomfortable than mine was at that time to be suspected by Lord Orville of any clandestine actions wounded my soul I was too much discomposed to wait for Mr Macartney nor in truth could I endure to have the design of my staying so well known Yet I was so extremely agitated that I could hardly move and I have reason to believe Lord Orville from the parlourwindow saw me tottering along for before I had taken five steps he came out and hastening to meet me said I fear you are not well pray allow me offering his arm to assist you
No my Lord said I with all the resolution I could assume yet I was affected by an attention at that time so little expected and forced to turn away my head to conceal my emotion
You must said he with earnestness indeed you mustI am sure you are not wellrefuse me not the honour of assisting you and almost forcibly he took my hand and drawing it under his arm obliged me to lean upon him That I submitted was partly the effect of surprise at an earnestness so uncommon in Lord Orville and partly that I did not just then dare trust my voice to make any objection
When we came to the house he led me into the parlour and to a
chair and
begged to know if I would not have a glass of water
No my Lord I thank you said I I am perfectly recovered and rising I walked to the window where for some time I pretended to be occupied in looking at the garden
Determined as I was to act honourably by Mr Macartney I yet most anxiously wished to be restored to the good opinion of Lord Orville but his silence and the thoughtfulness of his air discouraged me from speaking
My situation soon grew disagreeable and embarrassing and I resolved to return to my chamber till breakfast was ready To remain longer I feared might seem asking for his enquiries and I was sure it would ill become me to be more eager to speak than he was to hear
Just as I reached the door turning to me hastily he said Are you going Miss Anville
I am my Lord answered I yet I stopped
Perhaps to return tobut I beg your pardon He spoke with a degree of agitation that made me readily comprehend he meant to the garden and I instantly said To my own room my Lord And again I would have gone but convinced by my answer that I understood him I believe he was sorry for the insinuation he approached me with a very serious air though at the same time he forced a smile and said I know not what evil genius pursues me this morning but I seem destined to do or to say something I ought not I am so much ashamed of myself that I can scarce solicit your forgiveness
My forgiveness my Lord cried I abashed rather than elated by his condescension surely you cannotyou are not serious
Indeed never more so yet if I may be my own interpreter Miss
Anvilles countenance pronounces my pardon
I know not my Lord how any one can pardon who never has been offended
You are very good yet I could expect no less from a sweetness of disposition which baffles all comparison you will not think I am an encroacher and that I take advantage of your goodness should I once more remind you of the promise you vouchsafed me yesterday
No indeed on the contrary I shall be very happy to acquit myself in your Lordships opinion
Acquittal you need not said he leading me again to the window
yet I
own my curiosity is strongly excited
When I was seated I found myself much at a loss what to say yet after a short silence assuming all the courage in my power Will you not my Lord said I think me trifling and capricious should I own I have repented the promise I made and should I entreat your Lordship not to insist upon my strict performance of itI spoke so hastily that I did not at the time consider the impropriety of what I said
As he was entirely silent and profoundly attentive I continued to speak without interruption
If your Lordship by any other means knew the circumstances attending my acquaintance with Mr Macartney I am most sure you would yourself disapprove my relating them He is a gentleman and has been very unfortunatebut I am notI thinkat liberty to say more yet I am sure if he knew your Lordship wished to hear any particulars of his affairs he would readily consent to my acknowledging themshall I my Lord ask his permission
His affairs repeated Lord Orville by no means I have not the least curiosity about them
I beg your Lordships pardonbut indeed I had understood the contrary
Is it possible Madam you could suppose the affairs of an utter stranger can excite my curiosity
The gravity and coldness with which he asked this question very much abashed me But Lord Orville is the most delicate of men and presently recollecting himself he added I mean not to speak with indifference of any friend of yoursfar from it any such will always command my good wishes yet I own I am rather disappointed and though I doubt not the justice of your reason to which I implicitly submit you must not wonder that when upon the point of being honoured with your confidence I should feel the greatest regret at finding it withdrawn
Do you think my dear sir I did not at that moment require all my resolution to guard me from frankly telling him whatever he wished to hear yet I rejoice that I did not for added to the actual wrong I should have done Lord Orville himself when he had heard would I am sure have blamed me Fortunately this thought occurred to me an I said Your Lordship shall yourself be my judge the promise I made though voluntary was rash and inconsiderate yet had it concerned myself I would not have hesitated in fulfilling it but the gentleman whose affairs I should be obliged to relate
Pardon me cried he for interrupting you yet allow me to assure you I have not the slightest desire to be acquainted with his affairs further than what belongs to the motives which induced you yesterday morning He stopped but there was no occasion to say more
That my Lord cried I I will tell you honestly Mr Macartney had some particular business with me and I could not take the liberty to ask him hither
And why notMr Beaumont I am sure
I could not my Lord think of intruding upon Mrs Beaumonts complaisance and so with the same hasty folly I promised your Lordship I much more rashly promised to meet him
And did you
No my Lord said I colouring I returned before he came
Again for some time we were both silent yet unwilling to leave him to reflections which could not but be to my disadvantage I summoned sufficient courage to say There is no young creature my Lord who so greatly wants or so earnestly wishes for the advice and assistance of her friends as I do I am new to the world and unused to acting for myselfmy intentions are never willfully blameable yet I err perpetuallyI have hitherto been blessed with the most affectionate of friends and indeed the ablest of men to guide and instruct me upon every occasionbut he is too distant now to be applied to at the moment I want his aidand herethere is not a human being whose counsel I can ask
Would to Heaven cried he with a countenance from which all coldness and gravity were banished and succeeded by the mildest benevolence that I were worthyand capableof supplying the place of such a friend to Miss Anville
You do me but too much honour said I yet I hope your Lordships candourperhaps I ought to say indulgencewill make some allowance on account of my inexperience for behaviour so inconsiderateMay I my Lord hope that you will
May I cried he hope that you will pardon the illgrace with
which I have
submitted to my disappointment And that you will permit me kissing
my hand thus to seal my peace
Our peace my Lord said I with revived spirits
This then said he again pressing it to his lips for our peace and noware we not friends
Just then the door opened and I had only time to withdraw my hand before the ladies came in to breakfast
I have been all day the happiest of human beingsto be thus reconciled to Lord Orville and yet to adhere to my resolutionwhat could I wish for morehe too has been very cheerful and more attentive more obliging to me than ever Yet Heaven forbid I should again be in a similar situation for I cannot express how much uneasiness I have suffered from the fear of incurring his ill opinion
But what will poor Mr Macartney think of me Happy as I am I much regret the necessity I have been under of disappointing him
Adieu my dearest Sir
LETTER LXVII
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill Sept 28th
DEAD to the world and equally insensible to its pleasures or its pains I long since bad adieu to all joy and defiance to all sorrow but what should spring from my Evelinasole source to me of all earthly felicity How strange then is it that the letter in which she tells me she is the happiest of human beings should give me most mortal inquietude
Alas my childthat innocence the first best gift of Heaven should of all others be the blindest to its own dangerthe most exposed to treacheryand the least able to defend itself in a world where it is little known less valued and perpetually deceived
Would to Heaven you were herethen by degrees and with gentleness I might enter upon a subject too delicate for distant discussion Yet is it too interesting and the situation too critical to allow of delayOh my Evelina your situation is critical indeedyour peace of mind is at stake and every chance for your future happiness may depend upon the conduct of the present moment
Hitherto I have forborne to speak with you upon the most important of all concerns the state of your heartalas I need no information I have been silent indeed but I have not been blind
Long and with the deepest regret have I perceived the ascendancy which Lord Orville has gained upon your mindYou will start at the mention of his nameyou will tremble every word you readI grieve to give pain to my gentle Evelina but I dare not any longer spare her
Your first meeting with Lord Orville was decisive Lively fearless free from all other impressions such a man as you describe him could not fail of exciting your admiration and the more dangerously because he seemed as unconscious of his power as you of your weakness and therefore you had no alarm either from his vanity of your own prudence
Young animated entirely off your guard and thoughtless of consequences Imagination took the reins and Reason slowpaced though surefooted was unequal to the race of so eccentric and flighty a companion How rapid was then my Evelinas progress through those regions of fancy and passion whither her new guide conducted herShe saw Lord Orville at a balland he was the most amiable of men She met him again at anotherand he had every virtue under Heaven
I mean not to depreciate the merit of Lord Orville who one mysterious instance alone excepted seems to have deserved the idea you formed of his character but it was not time it was not the knowledge of his worth obtained your regard your new comrade had not patience to wait any trial her glowing pencil dipt in the vivid colours of her creative ideas painted to you at the moment of your first acquaintance all the excellencies all the good and rare qualities which a great length of time and intimacy could alone have really discovered
You flattered yourself that your partiality was the effect of esteem founded upon a general love of merit and a principle of justice and your heart which fell the sacrifice of your error was totally gone ere you expected it was in danger
A thousand times have I been upon the point of showing you the perils of your situation but the same inexperience which occasioned your mistake I hoped with the assistance of time and absence would effect a cure I was indeed most unwilling to destroy your illusion while I dared hope it might itself contribute to the restoration of your tranquillity since your ignorance of the danger and force of your attachment might possibly prevent that despondency with which young people in similar circumstances are apt to persuade themselves that what is only difficult is absolutely impossible
But now since you have again met and have become more intimate than ever all my hope from silence and seeming ignorance is at an end
Awake then my dear my deluded child awake to the sense of your danger and exert yourself to avoid the evils with which it threatens youevils which to a mind like yours are most to be dreaded secret repining and concealed yet consuming regret Make a noble effort for the recovery of your peace which now with sorrow I see it depends wholly upon the presence of Lord Orville This effort may indeed be painful but trust to my experience when I assure you it is requisite
You must quit himhis sight is baneful to your repose his society is death to your future tranquillity Believe me my beloved child my heart aches for your suffering while it dictates its necessity
Could I flatter myself that Lord Orville would indeed be sensible of your worth and act with a nobleness of mind which should prove it congenial to your own then would I leave my Evelina to the unmolested enjoyment of the cheerful society and increasing regard of a man she so greatly admires but this is not an age in which we may trust to appearances and imprudence is much sooner regretted than repaired Your health you tell me is much mendedCan you then consent to leave Bristolnot abruptly that I do not desire but in a few days from the time you receive this I will write to Mrs Selwyn and tell her how much I wish your return and Mrs Clinton can take sufficient care of you
I have meditated upon every possible expedient that might tend to your happiness ere I fixed upon exacting from you a compliance which I am convinced will be most painful to you but I can satisfy myself in none This will at least be safe and as to successwe must leave it to time
I am very glad to hear of Mr Macartneys welfare
Adieu my dearest child Heaven preserve and strengthen you AV
LETTER LXVIII
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Clifton Sept 28th
SWEETLY most sweetly have two days more passed since I wrote but I have been too much engaged to be exact in my journal
Today has been less tranquil It was destined for the decision of the important bet and has been productive of general confusion throughout the house It was settled that the race should be run at five oclock in the afternoon Lord Merton breakfasted here and staid till noon He wanted to engage the ladies to bet on his side in the true spirit of gaming without seeing the racers But he could only prevail on Lady Louisa as Mrs Selwyn said she never laid a wager against her own wishes and Mrs Beaumont would not take sides As for me I was not applied to It is impossible for negligence to be more pointed than that of Lord Merton to me in the presence of Lady Louisa
But just before dinner I happened to be alone in the drawingroom when his Lordship suddenly returned and coming in with his usual familiarity he was beginning You see Lady Louisa but stopping short Pray wheres every body gone
Indeed I dont know my Lord
He then shut the door and with a great alteration in his face and manner advanced eagerly towards me and said How glad I am my sweet girl to meet you at last alone By my soul I began to think there was a plot against me for Ive never been able to have you a minute to myself And very freely he seized my hand
I was so much surprised at this address after having been so long totally neglected that I could make no other answer than staring at him with unfeigned astonishment
Why now continued he if you was not the cruellest little angel in the world you would have helped me to some expedient for you see how I am watched here Lady Louisas eyes are never off me She gives me a charming foretaste of the pleasures of a wife However it wont last long
Disgusted to the greatest degree I attempted to draw away my hand but I believe I should not have succeeded if Mrs Beaumont had not made her appearance He turned from me with the greatest assurance and said How are you Maamhow is Lady Louisayou see I cant live a moment out of the house
Could you my dearest Sir have believed it possible for such effrontery to be in man
Before dinner came Mr Coverley and before five oclock Mr Lovel and some other company The place marked out for the race was a gravelwalk in Mrs Beaumonts garden and the length of the ground twenty yards When we were summoned to the course the two poor old women made their appearance Though they seemed very healthy for their time of life they yet looked so weak so infirm so feeble that I could feel no sensation but that of pity at the sight However this was not the general sense of the company for they no sooner came forward than they were greeted with a laugh from every beholder Lord Orville excepted who looked very grave during the whole transaction Doubtless he must be greatly discontented at the dissipated conduct and extravagance of a man with whom he is soon to be so nearly connected
For some time the scene was truly ridiculous the agitation of the parties concerned and the bets that were laid upon the old women were absurd beyond measure Who are you for and whose side are you of was echoed from mouth to mouth by the whole company Lord Merton and Mr Coverley were both so excessively gay and noisy that I soon found they had been free in drinking to their success They handed with loud shouts the old women to the raceground and encouraged them by liberal promises to exert themselves
When the signal was given for them to set off the poor creatures feeble and frightened ran against each other and neither of them able to support the shock they both fell on the ground
Lord Merton and Mr Coverley flew to their assistance Seats were brought for them and they each drank a glass of wine They complained of being much bruised for heavy and helpless they had not been able to save themselves but fell with their whole weight upon the gravel However as they seemed equal sufferers both parties were too eager to have the affair deferred
Again therefore they set off and hobbled along nearly even with each other for some time yet frequently to the inexpressible diversion of the company they stumbled and tottered and the confused hallooing of Now Coverley Now Merton run from side to side during the whole affair
Not long after a foot of one of the poor women slipt and with great force she came again to the ground Involuntarily I sprung forward to assist her but Lord Merton to whom she did not belong stopped me calling out No foul play No foul play
Mr Coverley then repeating the same words went himself to help her and insisted that the other should stop A debate ensued but the poor creature was too much hurt to move and declared her utter inability to make another attempt Mr Coverley was quite brutal he swore at her with unmanly rage and seemed scarce able to refrain even from striking her
Lord Merton then in great rapture said it was a hollow thing but Mr Coverley contended that the fall was accidental and time should be allowed for the woman to recover However all the company being against him he was pronounced the loser
We then went to the drawingroom to tea After which the evening being remarkably warm we all walked in the garden Lord Merton was quite riotous and Lady Louisa in high spirits but Mr Coverley endeavoured in vain to conceal his chagrin
As Lord Orville was thoughtful and walked by himself I expected that as usual I should pass unnoticed and be left to my own meditations but this was not the case for Lord Merton entirely off his guard giddy equally from wine and success was very troublesome to me and regardless of the presence of Lady Louisa which hitherto has restrained him even from common civility he attached himself to me during the walk with a freedom of gallantry that put me extremely out of countenance He paid me the most highflown compliments and frequently and forcibly seized my hand though I repeatedly and with undissembled anger drew it back Lord Orville I saw watched us with earnestness and Lady Louisas smiles were converted into looks of disdain
I could not bear to be thus situated and complaining I was tired
I quickened my pace with intention to return to the house but
Lord Merton hastily following caught my hand and saying the day
was his own vowed he would not let me go
You must my Lord cried I extremely flurried
You are the most charming girl in the world said he and never looked better than at this moment
My Lord cried Mrs Selwyn advancing to us you dont consider that the better Miss Anville looks the more striking is the contrast with your Lordship therefore for your own sake I would advise you not to hold her
Egad my Lord cried Mr Coverley I dont see what right you have to the best old and the best young woman too in the same day
Best young woman repeated Mr Lovel pon honour Jack you have made a most unfortunate speech however if Lady Louisa can pardon youand her Ladyship is all goodnessI am sure nobody else can for you have committed an outrageous solecism in good manners
And pray Sir said Mrs Selwyn under what denomination may your own speech pass
Mr Lovel turning another way affected not to hear her and Mr Coverley bowing to Lady Louisa said Her Ladyship is well acquainted with my devotionbut egad I dont know how it isI had always an unlucky turn at an epigram and never could resist a smart play upon words in my life
Pray my Lord cried I let go my hand Pray Mrs Selwyn speak for me
My Lord said Mrs Selwyn in detaining Miss Anville any longer you only lose time for we are already as well convinced of your valour and your strength as if you were to hold her an age
My Lord said Mrs Beaumont I must beg leave to interfere I know not if Lady Louisa can pardon you but as this young lady is at my house I do not choose to have her made uneasy
I pardon him cried Lady Louisa I declare I am monstrous glad to get rid of him
Egad my Lord cried Mr Coverley while you are grasping at a shadow youll lose a substance youd best make your peace while you can
Pray Mr Coverley be quiet said Lady Louisa peevishly for I declare I wont speak to him Brother taking hold of Lord Orvilles arm will you walk in with me
Would to Heaven cried I frightened to see how much Lord Merton was in liquor that I too had a brotherand then I should not be exposed to such treatment
Lord Orville instantly quitting Lady Louisa said Will Miss Anville allow me the honour of taking that title and then without waiting for any answer he disengaged me from Lord Merton and handing me to Lady Louisa Let me added he take equal care of both my sisters and then desiring her to take hold of one arm and begging me to make use of the other we reached the house in a moment Lord Merton disordered as he was attempted not to stop us
As soon as we entered the house I withdrew my arm and courtsied my thanks for my heart was too full for speech Lady Louisa evidently hurt at her brothers condescension and piqued extremely by Lord Mertons behaviour silently drew away hers and biting her lips with a look of infinite vexation walked sullenly up the hall
Lord Orville asked her if she would not go into the parlour
No answered she haughtily I leave you and your new sister together and then she walked up stairs
I was quite confounded at the pride and rudeness of this speech Lord Orville himself seemed thunderstruck I turned from him and went into the parlour he followed me saying Must I now apologize to Miss Anville for the liberty of my interferenceor ought I to apologize that I did not as I wished interfere sooner
O my Lord cried I with an emotion I could not repress it is from you alone I meet with any respectall others treat me with impertinence or contempt
I am sorry I had not more command of myself as he had reason just then to suppose I particularly meant his sister which I am sure must very much hurt him
Good Heaven cried he that so much sweetness and merit can fail to excite the love and admiration so justly their due I cannotI dare not express to you half the indignation I feel at this moment
I am sorry my Lord said I more calmly to have raised it but yetin a situation that calls for protection to meet only with mortificationsindeed but I am ill formed to bear them
My dear Miss Anville cried he warmly allow me to be your friend think of me as if I were indeed your brother and let me intreat you to accept my best services if there is any thing in which I can be so happy as to show my regardmy respect for you
Before I had time to speak the rest of the party entered the parlour and as I did not wish to see anything more of Lord Merton at least before he had slept I determined to leave it Lord Orville seeing my design said as I passed him Will you go Had not I best my Lord said I I am afraid said he smiling since I must now speak as your brother I am afraid you had you see you may trust me since I can advise against my own interest
I then left the room and have been writing ever since And methinks I can never lament the rudeness of Lord Merton as it has more than ever confirmed to me the esteem of Lord Orville
LETTER LXIX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Sept 30th
OH Sir what a strange incident have I to recite what a field of conjecture to open
Yesterday evening we all went to an assembly Lord Orville presented tickets to the whole family and did me the honour to the no small surprise of all here I believe to dance with me But every day abounds in fresh instances of his condescending politeness and he now takes every opportunity of calling me his friend and his sister
Lord Merton offered a ticket to Lady Louisa but she was so much incensed against him that she refused it with the utmost disdain neither could he prevail upon her to dance with him she sat still the whole evening and deigned not to look at or speak to him To me her behaviour is almost the same for she is cold distant and haughty and her eyes express the greatest contempt But for Lord Orville how miserable would my residence here make me
We were joined in the ballroom by Mr Coverley Mr Lovel and Lord Merton who looked as if he was doing penance and sat all the evening next to Lady Louisa vainly endeavouring to appease her anger
Lord Orville began the minuets he danced with a young lady who seemed to engage the general attention as she had not been seen here before She is pretty and looks mild and goodhumoured
Pray Mr Lovel said Lady Louisa who is that
Miss Belmont answered he the young heiress she came to the
Wells yesterday
Struck with the name I involuntarily repeated it but nobody heard me
What is her family said Mrs Beaumont
Have you not heard of her Maam cried he she is only daughter and heiress of Sir John Belmont
Good Heaven how did I start the name struck my ear like a thunderbolt Mrs Selwyn who immediately looked at me said Be calm my dear and we will learn the truth of all this
Till then I had never imagined her to be acquainted with my story but she has since told me that she knew my unhappy mother and was well informed of the whole affair
She asked Mr Lovel a multitude of questions and I gathered from his answers that this young lady was just come from abroad with Sir John Belmont who was now in London that she was under the care of his sister Mrs Paterson and that she would inherit a considerable estate
I cannot express the strange feelings with which I was agitated during this recital What my dearest Sir can it possibly mean Did you ever hear of any aftermarriageor must I suppose that while the lawful child is rejected another is adoptedI know not what to think I am bewildered with a contrariety of ideas
When we came home Mrs Selwyn passed more than an hour in my room conversing upon this subject She says that I ought instantly to go to town find out my father and have the affair cleared up She assures me I have too strong a resemblance to my dear though unknown mother to allow of the least hesitation in my being owned when once I am seen For my part I have no wish but to act by your direction
I cannot give any account of the evening so disturbed so occupied am I by this subject that I can think of no other I have entreated Mrs Selwyn to observe the strictest secrecy and she has promised that she will Indeed she has too much sense to be idly communicative
Lord Orville took notice of my being absent and silent but I ventured not to intrust him with the cause Fortunately he was not of the party at the time Mr Lovel made the discovery
Mrs Selwyn says that if you approve my going to town she will herself accompany me I had a thousand times rather ask the protection of Mrs Mirvan but after this offer that will not be possible
Adieu my dearest Sir I am sure you will write immediately and I shall be all impatience till your letter arrives
LETTER LXX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Oct 1st
GOOD God my dear Sir what a wonderful tale have I again to relate even yet I am not recovered from my extreme surprise
Yesterday morning as soon as I had finished my hasty letter I was summoned to attend a walking party to the Hot Wells It consisted only of Mrs Selwyn and Lord Orville The latter walked by my side all the way and his conversation dissipated my uneasiness and insensibly restored my serenity
At the pumproom I saw Mr Macartney I courtsied to him twice ere he would speak to me When he did I began to apologize for having disappointed him but I did not find it very easy to excuse myself as Lord Orvilles eyes with an expression of anxiety that distressed me turned from him to me and me to him every word I spoke Convinced however that I had really trifled with Mr Macartney I scrupled not to beg his pardon He was then not merely appeased but even grateful
He requested me to see him tomorrow but I had not the folly to be again guilty of an indiscretion which had already caused me so much uneasiness and therefore I told him frankly that it was not in my power at present to see him but by accident and to prevent his being offended I hinted to him the reason I could not receive him as I wished to do
When I had satisfied both him and myself upon this subject I turned to Lord Orville and saw with concern the gravity of his countenance I would have spoken to him but knew not how I believe however he read my thoughts for in a little time with a sort of serious smile he said Does not Mr Macartney complain of his disappointment
Not much my Lord
And how have you appeased him Finding I hesitated what to answer Am I not your brother continued he and must I not enquire into your affairs
Certainly my Lord said I laughing I only wish it were better worth your Lordships while
Let me then make immediate use of my privilege When shall you see Mr Macartney again
Indeed my Lord I cant tell
Butdo you know that I shall not suffer my sister to make a private appointment
Pray my Lord cried I earnestly use that word no more Indeed you shock me extremely
That would I not do for the world cried he yet you know not how warmly how deeply I am interested not only in all your concerns but in all your actions
This speechthe most particular one Lord Orville had ever made to me ended our conversation at that time for I was too much struck by it to make any answer
Soon after Mr Macartney in a low voice intreated me not to deny him the gratification of returning the money While he was speaking the young lady I saw yesterday at the assembly with the large party entered the pumproom Mr Macartney turned as pale as death his voice faultered and he seemed not to know what he said I was myself almost equally disturbed by the crowd of confused ideas that occurred to me Good Heaven thought I why should he be thus agitatedis it possible this can be the young lady he loved
In a few minutes we quitted the pumproom and though I twice wished
Mr Macartney good morning he was so absent he did not hear me
We did not immediately return to Clifton as Mrs Selwyn had business at a pamphlet shop While she was looking at some new poems Lord Orville again asked me when I should see Mr Macartney
Indeed my Lord cried I I know not but I would give the universe for a few moments conversation with him I spoke this with a simple sincerity and was not aware of the force of my own words
The universe repeated he Good God Miss Anville do you say this to me
I would say it returned I to any body my Lord
I beg your pardon said he in a voice that showed him ill pleased
I am answered
My Lord cried I you must not judge hardly of me I spoke inadvertently but if you knew the painful suspense I suffer at this moment you would not be surprised at what I have said
And would a meeting with Mr Macartney relieve you from that suspense
Yes my Lord two words might be sufficient
Would to Heaven cried he after a short pause that I were worthy to know their import
Worthy my LordO if that were all your Lordship could ask nothing I should not be ready to answer If I were but at liberty to speak I should be proud of your Lordships enquiries but indeed I am notI have not any right to communicate the affairs of Mr Macartneyyour Lordship cannot suppose I have
I will own to you answered he I know not what to suppose yet there seems a frankness even in your mysteryand such an air of openness in your countenance that I am willing to hope He stopped a moment and then added This meeting you say is essential to your repose
I did not say that my Lord but yet I have the most important reasons for wishing to speak to him
He paused a few minutes and then said with warmth Yes you shall speak to himI will myself assist youMiss Anville I am sure cannot form a wish against propriety I will ask no questions I will rely upon her own purity and uninformed blindfold as I am I will serve her with all my power And then he went into the shop leaving me so strangely affected by his generous behaviour that I almost wished to follow him with my thanks
When Mrs Selwyn had transacted her affairs we returned home
The moment dinner was over Lord Orville went out and did not come back till just as we were summoned to supper This is the longest time he has spent from the house since I have been at Clifton and you cannot imagine my dear Sir how much I missed him I scarce knew before how infinitely I am indebted to him alone for the happiness I have enjoyed since I have been at Mrs Beaumonts
As I generally go down stairs last he came to me the moment the ladies had passed by and said Shall you be at home tomorrow morning
I believe so my Lord
And will you then receive a visitor for me
For you my Lord
YesI have made acquaintance with Mr Macartney and he has promised to call upon me tomorrow about three oclock
And then taking my hand he led me down stairs
O Sirwas there ever such another man as Lord OrvilleYes one other now resides at Berry Hill
This morning there has been a great deal of company here but at the time appointed by Lord Orville doubtless with that consideration the parlour is almost always empty as every body is dressing
Mrs Beaumont however was not gone up stairs when Mr Macartney sent in his name
Lord Orville immediately said Beg the favour of him to walk in You see Madam that I consider myself as at home
I hope so answered Mrs Beaumont or I should be very uneasy
Mr Macartney then entered I believe we both felt very conscious to whom the visit was paid but Lord Orville received him as his own guest and not merely entertained him as such while Mrs Beaumont remained in the room but for some time after she had left it a delicacy that saved me from the embarrassment I should have felt had he immediately quitted us
In a few minutes however he gave Mr Macartney a bookfor I too by way of pretence for continuing in the room pretended to be readingand begged he would be so good as to look it over while he answered a note which he would dispatch in a few minutes and return to him
When he was gone we both parted with our books and Mr Macartney again producing the paper with the money besought me to accept it
Pray said I still declining it did you know the young lady who came into the pumproom yesterday morning
Know her repeated he changing colour Oh but too well
Indeed
Why Madam do you ask
I must beseech you to satisfy me further upon this subject pray tell me who she is
Inviolably as I meant to keep my secret I can refuse you Madam nothingthat ladyis the daughter of Sir John Belmontof my father
Gracious Heaven cried I involuntarily laying my hand on his arm you are then my brother I would have said but my voice failed me and I burst into tears
Oh Madam cried he what does this meanwhat can thus distress you
I could not answer but held out my hand to him He seemed greatly surprised and talked in high terms of my condescension
Spare yourself cried I wiping my eyes spare yourself this mistakeyou have a right to all I can do for you the similarity of our circumstances
We were then interrupted by the entrance of Mrs Selwyn and Mr Macartney finding no probability of our being left alone was obliged to take leave though I believe very reluctantly while in such suspense
Mrs Selwyn then by dint of interrogatories drew from me the state of this affair She is so penetrating that there is no possibility of evading to give her satisfaction
Is not this a strange event Good Heaven how little did I think that the visits I so unwillingly paid at Mr Branghtons would have introduced me to so near a relation I will never again regret the time I spent in town this summer a circumstance so fortunate will always make me think of it with pleasure
I have just received your letterand it has almost broken my heartOh Sir the illusion is over indeed how vainly have I flattered how miserably deceived myself Long since doubtful of the situation of my heart I dreaded a scrutinybut now now that I have so long escaped I began indeed to think my safety insured to hope that my fears were causeless and to believe that my good opinion and esteem of Lord Orville might be owned without suspicion and felt without dangermiserably deceived indeed His sight is baneful to my reposehis society is death to my future tranquillity Oh Lord Orville could I have believed that a friendship so grateful to my heart so soothing to my distresses a friendship which in every respect did me so much honour would only serve to embitter all my future momentsWhat a strange what an unhappy circumstance that my gratitude though so justly excited should be so fatal to my peace
Yes Sir I will quit himwould to Heaven I could at this moment without seeing him againwithout trusting to my now conscious emotionOh Lord Orville how little do you know the evils I owe to you how little suppose that when most dignified by your attention I was most to be pitiedand when most exalted by your notice you were most my enemy
You Sir relied upon my ignoranceI alas upon your experience and whenever I doubted the weakness of my heart the idea that you did not suspect it reassured merestored my courage and confirmed my errorYet am I most sensible of the kindness of your silence
Oh Sir why have I ever quitted you why been exposed to dangers to which I am so unequal
But I will leave this place leave Lord Orvilleleave him perhaps for everno matter your counsel your goodness may teach me how to recover the peace and the serenity of which my unguarded folly has beguiled me To you alone do I trustin you alone confide for every future hope I may form
The more I consider the parting with Lord Orville the less fortitude do I feel to bear the separationthe friendship he has shown mehis politenesshis sweetness of mannershis concern in my affairshis solicitude to oblige meall all to be given up
No I cannot tell him I am goingI dare not trust myself to take leave of himI will run away without seeing himimplicitly will I follow your advice avoid his sight and shun his society
Tomorrow morning I will set off for Berry Hill Mrs Selwyn and
Mrs Beaumont shall alone know my intention And todayI will spend
in my own room The readiness of my obedience is the only atonement
I can offer for the weakness which calls for its exertion
Can you will you most honoured most dear Sir sole prop by which the poor Evelina is supportedcan you without reproach without displeasure receive the child you have so carefully rearedfrom whose education better fruit might have been expected and who blushing for her unworthiness fears to meet the eye by which she has been cherishedOh yes I am sure you will Your Evelinas errors are those of the judgment and you I well know pardon all but those of the heart
LETTER LXXI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Clifton October 1st
I HAVE only time my dearest Sir for three words to overtake my last letter and prevent your expecting me immediately for when I communicated my intention to Mrs Selwyn she would not hear of it and declared it would be highly ridiculous for me to go before I received an answer to my intelligence concerning the journey from Paris She has therefore insisted upon my waiting till your next letter arrives I hope you will not be displeased at my compliance though it is rather against my own judgment but Mrs Selwyn quite overpowered me with the force of her arguments I will however see very little of Lord Orville I will never come down stairs before breakfast give up all my walks in the garden seat myself next to Mrs Selwyn and not merely avoid his conversation but shun his presence I will exert all the prudence and all the resolution in my power to prevent this short delay from giving you any further uneasiness
Adieu my dearest Sir I shall not now leave Clifton till I have your directions
LETTER LXXII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION October 2nd
YESTERDAY from the time I received your kind though heartpiercing letter I kept my roomfor I was equally unable and unwilling to see Lord Orville but this morning finding I seemed destined to pass a few days longer here I endeavoured to calm my spirits and to appear as usual though I determined to avoid him to the utmost of my power Indeed as I entered the parlour when called to breakfast my thoughts were so much occupied with your letter that I felt as much confusion at his sight as if he had himself been informed of its contents
Mrs Beaumont made me a slight compliment upon my recovery for I had pleaded illness to excuse keeping my room Lady Louisa spoke not a word but Lord Orville little imagining himself the cause of my indisposition enquired concerning my health with the most distinguishing politeness I hardly made any answer and for the first time since I have been here contrived to sit at some distance from him
I could not help observing that my reserve surprised him yet he persisted in his civilities and seemed to wish to remove it But I paid him very little attention and the moment breakfast was over instead of taking a book or walking in the garden I retired to my own room
Soon after Mrs Selwyn came to tell me that Lord Orville had been proposing I should take an airing and persuading her to let him drive us both in his phaeton She delivered the message with an archness that made me blush and added that an airing in my Lord Orvilles carriage could not fail to revive my spirits There is no possibility of escaping her discernment she has frequently rallied me upon his Lordships attentionand alasupon the pleasure with which I have received it However I absolutely refused the offer
Well said she laughing I cannot just now indulge you with any solicitation for to tell you the truth I have business to transact at the Wells and am glad to be excused myself I would ask you to walk with me but since Lord Orville is refused I have not the presumption to hope for success
Indeed cried I you are mistaken I will attend you with pleasure
O rare coquetry cried she surely it must be inherent in our sex or it could not have been imbibed at Berry Hill
I had not spirits to answer her and therefore put on my hat and cloak in silence
I presume continued she drily his Lordship may walk with us
If so Madam said I you will have a companion and I will stay at home
My dear child cried she did you bring the certificate of your birth with you
Dear Madam no
Why then we shall never be known again at Berry Hill
I felt too conscious to enjoy her pleasantry but I believe she was determined to torment me for she asked if she should inform Lord Orville that I desired him not to be of the party
By no means Madam but indeed I had rather not walk myself
My dear cried she I really do not know you this morningyou have certainly been taking a lesson of Lady Louisa
She then went down stairs but presently returning told me she had acquainted Lord Orville that I did not choose to go out in the phaeton but preferred a walk teteetete with her by way of variety
I said nothing but was really vexed She bad me go down stairs and said she would follow me immediately
Lord Orville met me in the hall I fear said he Miss Anville is not yet quite well and he would have taken my hand but I turned from him and courtsying slightly went into the parlour
Mrs Beaumont and Lady Louisa were at work Lord Merton was talking with the latter for he has now made his peace and is again received into favour
I seated myself as usual by the window Lord Orville in a few minutes came to me and said Why is Miss Anville so grave
Not grave my Lord said I only stupid and I took up a book
You will go said he after a short pause to the assembly tonight
No my Lord certainly not
Neither then will I for I should be sorry to sully the remembrance
I have of the happiness I enjoyed at the last
Mrs Selwyn then coming in general enquiries were made to all but me of who would go to the assembly Lord Orville instantly declared he had letters to write at home but every one else settled to go
I then hastened Mrs Selwyn away though not before she had said to Lord Orville Pray has your Lordship obtained Miss Anvilles leave to favour us with your company
I have not Madam answered he had the vanity to ask it
During our walk Mrs Selvyn tormented me unmercifully She told me that since I declined any addition to our party I must doubtless be conscious of my own powers of entertainment and begged me therefore to exert them freely I repented a thousand times having consented to walk alone with her for though I made the most painful efforts to appear in spirits her raillery quite overpowered me
We went first to the pumproom It was full of company and the moment we entered I heard a murmuring of Thats she and to my great confusion I saw every eye turned towards me I pulled my hat over my face and by the assistance of Mrs Selwyn endeavoured to screen myself from observation nevertheless I found I was so much the object of general attention that I entreated her to hasten away But unfortunately she had entered into conversation very earnestly with a gentleman of her acquaintance and would not listen to me but said that if I was tired of waiting I might walk on to the milliners with the Miss Watkins two young ladies I had seen at Mrs Beaumonts who were going thither
I accepted the offer very readily and away we went But we had not gone three yards before we were followed by a party of young men who took every possible opportunity of looking at us and as they walked behind talked aloud in a manner at once unintelligible and absurd Yes cried one tis certainly shemark but her blushing cheek
And then her eye her downcast eyecried another
True oh most true said a third every beauty is her own
But then said the first her mindnow the difficulty is to find out the truth of that for she will not say a word
She is timid answered another mark but her timid air
During this conversation we walked on silent and quick as we knew not to whom it was particularly addressed we were all equally ashamed and equally desirous to avoid such unaccountable observations
Soon after we were caught in a shower of rain We hurried on and these gentlemen following us offered their services in the most pressing manner begging us to make use of their arms and while I almost ran in order to avoid their impertinence I was suddenly met by Sir Clement Willoughby
We both started Good God he exclaimed Miss Anville and then regarding my tormentors with an air of displeasure he earnestly enquired if any thing had alarmed me
No no cried I for I found no difficulty now to disengage myself from these youths who probably concluding from the commanding air of Sir Clement that he had a right to protect me quietly gave way to him and entirely quitted us
With his usual impetuosity he then began a thousand enquiries accompanied with as many compliments and he told me that he arrived at Bristol but this morning which he had entirely devoted to endeavours to discover where I lodged
Did you know then said I that I was at Bristol
Would to Heaven cried he that I could remain in ignorance of your proceedings with the same contentment you do of mine then should I not for ever journey upon the wings of Hope to meet my own despair You cannot even judge of the cruelty of my fate for the ease and serenity of your mind incapacitates you from feeling for the agitation of mine
The ease and serenity of my mind alas how little do I merit those words
But added he had accident brought me hither had I not known of your journey the voice of fame would have proclaimed it to me instantly upon my arrival
The voice of fame repeated I
Yes for yours was the first name I heard at the pumproom But had I not heard your name such a description could have painted no one else
Indeed said I I do not understand you But just then arriving at the milliners our conversation ended for Miss Watkins called me to look at caps and ribbons
Sir Clement however has the art of being always at home he was very soon engaged as busily as ourselves in looking at lace ruffles yet he took an opportunity of saying to me in a low voice How charmed I am to see you look so well I was told you were illbut I never saw you in better healthnever more infinitely lovely
I turned away to examine the ribbons and soon after Mrs Selwyn made her appearance I found that she was acquainted with Sir Clement and her manner of speaking to him convinced me that he was a favourite with her
When their mutual compliments were over she turned to me and said
Pray Miss Anville how long can you live without nourishment
Indeed Maam said I laughing I have never tried
Because so long and no longer answered she you may remain at Bristol
Why what is the matter Maam
The matterwhy all the ladies are at open war with youthe whole pumproom is in confusion and you innocent as you pretend to look are the cause However if you take my advice you will be very careful how you eat and drink during your stay
I begged her to explain herself and she then told me that a copy of verses had been dropped in the pumproom and read there aloud The beauties of the Wells said she are all mentioned but you are the Venus to whom the prize is given
Is it then possible cried Sir Clement that you have not seen these verses
I hardly know answered I whether any body has
I assure you said Mrs Selwyn if you give me the invention of them you do me an honour I by no means deserve
I wrote down in my tablets said Sir Clement the stanzas which concern Miss Anville this morning at the pumproom and I will do myself the honour of copying them for her this evening
But why the part that concerns Miss Anville said Mrs Selwyn
Did you ever see her before this morning
O yes answered he I have had that happiness frequently at Captain Mirvans Too too frequently added he in a low voice as Mrs Selwyn turned to the milliner and as soon as she was occupied in examining some trimmings he came to me and almost whether I would or not entered into conversation with me
I have a thousand things cried he to say to you Pray where are you
With Mrs Selwyn Sir
Indeedthen for once chance is my friend And how long have you been here
About three weeks
Good Heaven what an anxious search have I had to discover your abode since you so suddenly left town The termagant Madame Duval refused me all intelligence Oh Miss Anville did you know what I have endured the sleepless restless state of suspense I have been tortured with you could not all cruel as you are you could not have received me with such frigid indifference
Received you Sir
Why is not my visit to you Do you think I should have made this journey but for the happiness of again seeing you
Indeed it is possible I mightsince so many others do
Cruel cruel girl you know that I adore you you know you are the mistress of my soul and arbitress of my fate
Mrs Selwyn then advancing to us he assumed a more disengaged air and asked if he should not have the pleasure of seeing her in the evening at the assembly
Oh yes cried she we shall certainly be there so you may bring the verses with you if Miss Anville can wait for them so long
I hope then returned he that you will do me the honour to dance with me
I thanked him but said I should not be at the assembly
Not be at the assembly cried Mrs Selwyn Why have you too letters to write
She looked at me with a significant archness that made me colour and I hastily answered No indeed Maam
You have not cried she yet more drily then pray my dear do you stay at home to helpor to hinder others
To do neither Maam answered I in much confusion so if you please I will not stay at home
You allow me then said Sir Clement to hope for the honour of your hand
I only bowedfor the dread of Mrs Selwyns raillery made me not dare refuse him
Soon after this we walked home Sir Clement accompanied us and the conversation that passed between Mrs Selwyn and him was supported in so lively a manner that I should have been much entertained had my mind been more at ease but alas I could think of nothing but the capricious the unmeaning appearance which the alteration in my conduct must make in the eyes of the Lord Orville And much as I wished to avoid him greatly as I desire to save myself from having my weakness known to himyet I cannot endure to incur his ill opinionand unacquainted as he is with the reasons by which I am actuated how can he fail contemning a change to him so unaccountable
As we entered the garden he was the first object we saw He advanced to meet us and I could not help observing that at sight of each other both he and Sir Clement changed colour
We went into the parlour where we found the same party we had left Mrs Selwyn presented Sir Clement to Mrs Beaumont Lady Louisa and Lord Merton he seemed well acquainted with already
The conversation was upon the general subjects of the weather the company at the Wells and the news of the day But Sir Clement drawing his chair next to mine took every opportunity of addressing himself to me in particular
I could not but remark the striking difference of his attention and that of Lord Orville the latter has such gentleness of manners such delicacy of conduct and an air so respectful that when he flatters most he never distresses and when he most confers honour appears to receive it The former obtrudes his attention and forces mine it is so pointed that it always confuses me and so public that it attracts general notice Indeed I have sometimes thought that he would rather wish than dislike to have his partiality for me known as he takes great care to prevent my being spoken to by any but himself
When at length he went away Lord Orville took his seat and said with a half smile Shall I call Sir Clementor will you call me an usurper for taking this placeYou make me no answerMust I then suppose that Sir Clement
It is little worth your Lordships while said I to suppose any thing upon so insignificant an occasion
Pardon me cried heto me nothing is insignificant in which you are concerned
To this I made no answer neither did he say any thing more till the ladies retired to dress and then when I would have followed them he stopped me saying One moment I entreat you
I turned back and he went on I greatly fear that I have been so unfortunate as to offend you yet so repugnant to my very soul is the idea that I know not how to suppose it possible I can unwittingly have done the thing in the world that designedly I would wish to avoid
No indeed my Lord you have not said I
You sigh cried he taking my hand would to Heaven I were the sharer of your uneasiness whencesoever it springs with what earnestness would I not struggle to alleviate itTell me my dear Miss Anvillemy newadopted sister my sweet and most amiable friendtell me I beseech you if I can afford you any assistance
None none my Lord cried I withdrawing my hand and moving towards the door
Is it then impossible I can serve youPerhaps you wish to see
Mr Macartney again
No my Lord And I held the door open
I am not I own sorry for that Yet oh Miss Anville there is a questionthere is a conjectureI know not how to mention because I dread the resultBut I see you are in hasteperhaps in the evening I may have the honour of a longer conversationYet one thing will you have the goodness to allow me to askDid you this morning when you went to the Wellsdid you know whom you should meet there
Who my Lord
I beg your pardon a thousand times for a curiosity so unlicensedbut
I will say no more at present
He bowed expecting me to goand then with quick steps but a heavy heart I came to my own room His question I am sure meant Sir Clement Willoughby and had I not imposed upon myself the severe task of avoiding flying Lord Orville with all my power I would instantly have satisfied him of my ignorance of Sir Clements journey And yet more did I long to say something of the assembly since I found he depended upon my spending the evening at home
I did not go down stairs again till the family was assembled to dinner My dress I saw struck Lord Orville with astonishment and I was myself so much ashamed of appearing whimsical and unsteady that I could not look up
I understood said Mrs Beaumont that Miss Anville did not go out this evening
Her intention in the morning said Mrs Selwyn was to stay at home but there is a fascinating power in an assembly which upon second thoughts is not to be resisted
The assembly cried Lord Orville are you then going to the assembly
I made no answer and we all took our places at table
It was not without difficulty that I contrived to give up my usual seat but I was determined to adhere to the promise in my yesterdays letter though I saw that Lord Orville seemed quite confounded at my visible endeavours to avoid him
After dinner we all went into the drawingroom together as there were no gentlemen to detain his Lordship and then before I could place myself out of his way he said You are then really going to the assemblyMay I ask if you shall dance
I believe notmy Lord
If I did not fear continued he that you would be tired of the same partner at two following assemblies I would give up my letterwriting till tomorrow evening and solicit the honour of your hand
If I do dance said I in great confusion I believe I am engaged
Engaged cried he with earnestness May I ask to whom
ToSir Clement Willoughby my Lord
He said nothing but looked very little pleased and did not address himself to me any more all the afternoon Oh Sirthus situated how comfortless were the feelings of your Evelina
Early in the evening with his accustomed assiduity Sir Clement came to conduct us to the assembly He soon contrived to seat himself next me and in a low voice paid me so many compliments that I knew not which way to look
Lord Orville hardly spoke a word and his countenance was grave and thoughtful yet whenever I raised my eyes his I perceived were directed towards me though instantly upon meeting mine he looked another way
In a short time Sir Clement taking from his pocket a folded paper said almost in a whisper Here loveliest of women you will see a faint an unsuccessful attempt to paint the object of all my adoration yet weak as are the lines for the purpose I envy beyond expression the happy mortal who has dared make the effort
I will look at them said I some other time For conscious that I was observed by Lord Orville I could not bear he should see me take a written paper so privately offered from Sir Clement But Sir Clement is an impracticable man and I never succeeded in any attempt to frustrate whatever he had planned
No said he still in a whisper you must take them now while Lady Louisa is away for she and Mrs Selwyn were gone up stairs to finish their dress as she must by no means see them
Indeed said I I have no intention to show them
But the only way answered he to avoid suspicion is to take them in her absence I would have read them aloud myself but that they are not proper to be seen by any body in this house yourself and Mrs Selwyn excepted
Then again he presented me the paper which I now was obliged to take as I found declining it was vain But I was sorry that this action should be seen and the whispering remarked though the purport of the conversation was left to conjecture
As I held it in my hand Sir Clement teazed me to look at it immediately and told me the reason he could not produce the lines publicly was that among the ladies who were mentioned and supposed to be rejected was Lady Louisa Larpent I am much concerned at this circumstance as I cannot doubt but that it will render me more disagreeable to her than ever if she should hear of it
I will now copy the verses which Sir Clement would not let me rest till I had read
See last advance with bashful grace
Downcast eye and blushing cheek
Timid air and beauteous face
Anvillewhom the Graces seek
Though evry beauty is her own
And though her mind each virtue fills
Anvilleto her power unknown
Artless strikesunconscious kills
I am sure my dear Sir you will not wonder that a panegyric such as this should in reading give me the greatest confusion and unfortunately before I had finished it the ladies returned
What have you there my dear said Mrs Selwyn
Nothing Maam said I hastily folding and putting it in my pocket
And has nothing cried she the power of rouge
I made no answer a deep sigh which escaped Lord Orville at that moment reached my ears and gave me sensationswhich I dare not mention
Lord Merton then handed Lady Louisa and Mrs Beaumont to the latters carriage Mrs Selwyn led the way to Sir Clements who handed me in after her
During the ride I did not once speak but when I came to the assembly room Sir Clement took care that I should not preserve my silence He asked me immediately to dance I begged him to excuse me and seek some other partner But on the contrary he told me he was very glad I would sit still as he had a million of things to say to me
He then began to tell me how much he had suffered from absence how greatly he was alarmed when he heard I had left town and how cruelly difficult he had found it to trace me which at last he could only do by sacrificing another week to Captain Mirvan
And Howard Grove continued he which at my first visit I thought the most delightful spot upon earth now appeared to me the most dismal the face of the country seemed altered the walks which I had thought most pleasant were now most stupid Lady Howard who had appeared a cheerful and respectable old lady now appeared in the common John Trot style of other aged dames Mrs Mirvan whom I had esteemed as an amiable piece of stilllife now became so insipid that I could hardly keep awake in her company the daughter too whom I had regarded as a goodhumoured pretty sort of a girl now seemed too insignificant for notice and as to the Captain I had always thought him a boobybut now he appeared a savage
Indeed Sir Clement cried I angrily I will not hear you speak thus of my best friends
I beg your pardon said he but the contrast of my two visits was too striking not to be mentioned
He then asked what I thought of the verses
Either said I they are written ironically or by some madman
Such a profusion of compliments ensued that I was obliged to propose dancing in my own defence When we stood up I intended said he to have discovered the author by his looks but I find you so much the general loadstone of attention that my suspicions change their object every moment Surely you must yourself have some knowledge who he is
I told him no Yet my dear Sir I must own to you I have no doubt but that Mr Macartney must be the author no one else would speak of me so partially and indeed his poetical turn puts it with me beyond dispute
He asked me a thousand questions concerning Lord Orville how long he had been at Bristolwhat time I had spent at Cliftonwhether he rode out every morningwhether I ever trusted myself in a phaeton and a multitude of other enquiries all tending to discover if I was honoured with much of his Lordships attention and all made with his usual freedom and impetuosity
Fortunately as I much wished to retire early Lady Louisa makes a point of being the first who quit the rooms and therefore we got home in very tolerable time
Lord Orvilles reception of us was grave and cold far from distinguishing me as usual by particular civilities Lady Louisa herself could not have seen me enter the room with more frigid unconcern nor have more scrupulously avoided honouring me with any notice But chiefly I was struck to see that he suffered Sir Clement who stayed supper to sit between us without any effort to prevent him though till then he had seemed to be even tenacious of a seat next mine
This little circumstance affected me more than I can express yet I endeavoured to rejoice at it since neglect and indifference from him may be my best friendsBut alasso suddenly so abruptly to forfeit his attentionto lose his friendshipOh Sir these thoughts pierced my soulscarce could I keep my seat for not all my efforts could restrain the tears from trickling down my cheeks however as Lord Orville saw them not for Sir Clements head was constantly between us I tried to collect my spirits and succeeded so far as to keep my place with decency till Sir Clement took leave and then not daring to trust my eyes to meet those of Lord Orville I retired
I have been writing ever since for certain that I could not sleep I would not go to bed Tell me my dearest Sir if you possibly can tell me that you approve my change of conducttell me that my altered behaviour to Lord Orville is rightthat my flying his society and avoiding his civilities are actions which you would have dictatedTell me this and the sacrifices I have made will comfort me in the midst of my regretfor never never can I cease to regret that I have lost the friendship of Lord OrvilleOh Sir I have slightedhave rejectedhave thrown it awayNo matter it was an honour I merited not to preserve and now I seethat my mind was unequal to sustaining it without danger
Yet so strong is the desire you have implanted in me to act with uprightness and propriety that however the weakness of my heart may distress and afflict me it will never I humbly trust render me wilfully culpable The wish of doing well governs every other as far as concerns my conductfor am I not your childthe creature of your own formingYet Oh Sir friend parent of my heartmy feelings are all at war with my duties and while I most struggle to acquire selfapprobation my peace my happiness my hopesare lost
Tis you alone can compose a mind so cruelly agitated you I well know can feel pity for the weakness to which you are a stranger and though you blame the affliction soothe and comfort the afflicted
LETTER LXXIII
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA Berry Hill Oct 3rd
YOUR last communication my dearest child is indeed astonishing that an acknowledged daughter and heiress of Sir John Belmont should be at Bristol and still my Evelina bear the name of Anville is to me inexplicable yet the mystery of the letter to Lady Howard prepared me to expect something extraordinary upon Sir John Belmonts return to England
Whoever this young lady may be it is certain she now takes a place to which you have a right indisputable An aftermarriage I never heard of yet supposing such a one to have happened Miss Evelyn was certainly the first wife and therefore her daughter must at least be entitled to the name of Belmont
Either there are circumstances in this affair at present utterly incomprehensible or else some strange and most atrocious fraud has been practiced which of these two is the case it now behoves us to enquire
My reluctance to this step gives way to my conviction of its propriety since the reputation of your dear and muchinjured mother must now either be fully cleared from blemish or receive its final and indelible wound
The public appearance of a daughter of Sir John Belmont will revive the remembrance of Miss Evelyns story in all who have heard itwho the mother was will be universally demandedand if any other Lady Belmont should be named the birth of my Evelina will receive a stigma against which honour truth and innocence may appeal in vaina stigma which will eternally blast the fair fame of her virtuous mother and cast upon her blameless self the odium of a title which not all her purity can rescue from established shame and dishonour
No my dear child no I will not quietly suffer the ashes of your mother to be treated with ignominy her spotless character shall be justified to the worldher marriage shall be acknowledged and her child shall bear the name to which she is lawfully entitled
It is true that Mrs Mirvan would conduct this affair with more delicacy than Mrs Selwyn yet perhaps to save time is of all considerations the most important since the longer this mystery is suffered to continue the more difficult may be rendered its explanation The sooner therefore you can set out for town the less formidable will be your task
Let not your timidity my dear love depress your spirits I shall indeed tremble for you at a meeting so singular and so affecting yet there can be no doubt of the success of your application I enclose a letter from your unhappy mother written and reserved purposely for this occasion Mrs Clinton too who attended her in her last illness must accompany you to townBut without any other certificate of your birth that which you carry in your countenance as it could not be affected by artifice so it cannot admit of a doubt
And now my Evelina committed at length to the care of your real parent receive the fervent prayers wishes and blessings of him who so fondly adopted you
Mayst thou O child of my bosom mayst thou in this change of situation experience no change of disposition but receive with humility and support with meekness the elevation to which thou art rising May thy manners language and deportment all evince that modest equanimity and cheerful gratitude which not merely deserve but dignify prosperity Mayst thou to the last moments of an unblemished life retain thy genuine simplicity thy singleness of heart thy guileless sincerity And mayst thou stranger to ostentation and superior to insolence with true greatness of soul shine forth conspicuous only in beneficence ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER LXXIV Inclosed in the preceding Letter
LADY BELMONT TO SIR JOHN BELMONT
IN the firm hope that the moment of anguish which approaches will prove the period of my sufferings once more I address myself to Sir John Belmont in behalf of the child who if it survives its mother will hereafter be the bearer of this letter
Yet in what termsOh most cruel of mencan the lost Caroline address you and not address you in vain Oh deaf to the voice of compassiondeaf to the sting of truthdeaf to every tie of honoursay in what terms may the lost Caroline address you and not address you in vain
Shall I call you by the loved the respected title of husbandNo you disclaim itthe father of my infantNo you doom it to infamythe lover who rescued me from a forced marriageNo you have yourself betrayed methe friend from whom I hoped succour and protectionNo you have consigned me to misery and destruction
Oh hardened against every plea of justice remorse or pity how and in what manner may I hope to move thee Is there one method I have left untried remains there one resource unessayed No I have exhausted all the bitterness of reproach and drained every sluice of compassion
Hopeless and almost desperate twenty times have I flung away my penbut the feelings of a mother a mother agonizing for the fate of her child again animating my courage as often I have resumed it
Perhaps when I am no more when the measure of my woes is completed and the still silent unreproaching dust has received my sad remainsthen perhaps when accusation is no longer to be feared nor detection to be dreaded the voice of equity and the cry of nature may be heard
Listen Oh Belmont to their dictates reprobate not your child though you have reprobated its mother The evils that are past perhaps when too late you may wish to recal the young creature you have persecuted perhaps when too late you may regret that you have destroyedyou may think with horror of the deceptions you have practised and the pangs of remorse may follow me to the tombOh Belmont all my resentment softens into pity at the thought what will become of thee good Heaven when with the eye of penitence thou reviewest thy past conduct
Hear then the solemn the last address with which the unhappy
Caoline will importune thee
If when the time of thy contrition arrivesfor arrive it mustwhen the sense of thy treachery shall rob thee of almost every other if then thy tortured heart shall sigh to expiate thy guiltmark the conditions upon which I leave thee my forgiveness
Thou knowest I am thy wifeclear then to the world the reputation thou hast sullied and receive as thy lawful successor the child who will present thee this my dying request
The worthiest the most benevolent the best of men to whose consoling kindness I owe the little tranquillity I have been able to preserve has plighted me his faith that upon no other conditions he will part with his helpless charge
Shouldst thou in the features of this deserted innocent trace the resemblance of the wretched Carolineshould its face bear the marks of its birth and revive in thy memory the image of its mother wilt thou not Belmont wilt thou not therefore renounce itOh babe of my fondest affection for whom already I experience all the tenderness of maternal pity look not like thy unfortunate motherlest the parent whom the hand of death may spare shall be snatched from thee by the more cruel means of unnatural antipathy
I can write no more The small share of serenity I have painfully acquired will not bear the shock of the dreadful ideas that crowd upon me
Adieufor ever
Yet Ohshall I not in this last farewell which thou wilt not read till every stormy passion is extinct and the kind grave has embosomed all my sorrowsshall I not offer to the man once so dear to me a ray of consolation to those afflictions he has in reserve Suffer me then to tell thee that my pity far exceeds my indignationthat I will pray for thee in my last moments and that the recollection of the love I once bore thee shall swallow up every other
Once more adieu CAROLINE BELMONT
LETTER LXXV
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS Clifton Oct 3rd
THIS morning I saw from my window that Lord Orville was walking in the garden but I would not go down stairs till breakfast was ready and then he paid me his compliments almost as coldly as Lady Louisa paid hers
I took my usual place and Mrs Belmont Lady Louisa and Mrs Selwyn entered into their usual conversationNot so your Evelina disregarded silent and melancholy she sat like a cypher whom to nobody belonging by nobody was noticed
Ill brooking such a situation and unable to suport the neglect of
Lord Orville the moment breakfast was over I left the room and
was going up stairs when very unpleasantly I was stopped by Sir
Clement Willoughby who flying into the hall prevented my proceeding
He enquired very particularly after my health and entreated me to return into the parlour Unwillingly I consented but thought any thing preferable to continuing alone with him and he would neither leave me nor suffer me to pass on Yet in returning I felt not a little ashamed at appearing thus to take the visit of Sir Clement to myself And indeed he endeavoured by his manner of addressing me to give it that air
He stayed I believe an hour nor would he perhaps even then have gone had not Mrs Beaumont broken up the party by proposing an airing in her coach Lady Louisa consented to accompany her but Mrs Selwyn when applied to said If my Lord or Sir Clement will join us I shall be happy to make onebut really a trio of females will be nervous to the last degree
Sir Clement readily agreed to attend them indeed he makes it his evident study to court the favour of Mrs Beaumont Lord Orville excused himself from going out and I retired to my own room What he did with himself I know not for I would not go down stairs till dinner was ready his coldness though my own change of behaviour had occasioned it so cruelly depresses my spirits that I know not how to support myself in his presence
At dinner I found Sir Clement again of the party Indeed he manages every thing his own way for Mrs Beaumont though by no means easy to please seems quite at his disposal
The dinner the afternoon and the evening were to me the most irksome imaginable I was tormented by the assiduity of Sir Clement who not only took but made opportunities of speaking to meand I was hurtOh how inexpressibly hurtthat Lord Orville not only forebore as hitherto seeking he even neglected all occasions of talking with me
I begin to think my dear Sir that the sudden alteration in my behaviour was illjudged and improper for as I had received no offence as the cause of the change was upon my account not his I should not have assumed so abruptly a reserve for which I dared assign no reasonnor have shunned his presence so obviously without considering the strange appearance of such a conduct
Alas my dearest Sir that my reflections should always be too late to serve me dearly indeed do I purchase experience and much I fear I shall suffer yet more severely from the heedless indiscretion of my temper ere I attain that prudence and consideration which by foreseeing distant consequences may rule and direct in present exigencies Oct 4th
Yesterday morning every body rode out except Mrs Selwyn and myself and we two sat for some time together in her room but as soon as I could I quitted her to saunter in the garden for she diverts herself so unmercifully with rallying me either upon my gravity or concerning Lord Orvillethat I dread having any conversation with her
Here I believe I spent an hour by myself when hearing the gardengate open I went into an arbour at the end of a long walk where ruminating very unpleasantly upon my future prospects I remained quietly seated but a few minutes before I was interrupted by the appearance of Sir Clement Willoughby
I started and would have left the arbour but he prevented me Indeed I am almost certain he had heard in the house where I was as it is not otherwise probable he would have strolled down the garden alone
Stop stop cried he loveliest and most beloved of women stop and hear me
Then making me keep my place he sat down by me and would have taken my hand but I drew it back and said I could not stay
Can you then cried he refuse me the smallest gratification though but yesterday I almost suffered martyrdom for the pleasure of seeing you
Martyrdom Sir Clement
Yes beauteous insensible martyrdom for did I not compel myself to be immured in a carriage the tedious length of a whole morning with the three most fatiguing women in England
Upon my word the ladies are extremely obliged to you
Oh returned he they have every one of them so copious a share of their own personal esteem that they have no right to repine at the failure of it in the world and indeed they will themselves be the last to discover it
How little cried I are those ladies aware of such severity from you
They are guarded answered he so happily and so securely by their own conceit that they are not aware of it from any body Oh Miss Anville to be torn away from you in order to be shut up with themis there a human being except your cruel self could forbear to pity me
I believe Sir Clement however hardly you may choose to judge of them your situation by the world in general would rather have been envied than pitied
The world in general answered he has the same opinion of them that I have myself Mrs Beaumont is every where laughed at Lady Louisa ridiculed and Mrs Selwyn hated
Good God Sir Clement what cruel strength of words do you use
It is you my angel are to blame since your perfections have rendered their faults so glaring I protest to you during our whole ride I thought the carriage drawn by snails The absurd pride of Mrs Beaumont and the respect she exacts are at once insufferable and stupifying had I never before been in her company I should have concluded that this had been her first airing from the heralds officeand wished her nothing worse than that it might also be the last I assure you that but for gaining the freedom of her house I would fly her as I would plague pestilence and famine Mrs Selwyn indeed afforded some relief from this formality but the unbounded license of her tongue
O Sir Clement do you object to that
Yes my sweet reproacher in a woman I do in a woman I think it intolerable She has wit I acknowledge and more understanding than half her sex put together but she keeps alive a perpetual expectation of satire that spreads a general uneasiness among all who are in her presence and she talks so much that even the best things she says weary the attention As to the little Louisa tis such a pretty piece of languor that tis almost cruel to speak rationally about herelse I should say she is a mere compound of affectation impertinence and airs
I am quite amazed said I that with such opinions you can behave to them all with so much attention and civility
Civility my angelwhy I could worship could adore them only to procure myself a moment of your conversation Have you not seen me pay my court to the gross Captain Mirvan and the virago Madame Duval Were it possible that a creature so horrid could be formed as to partake of the worst qualities of all these charactersa creature who should have the haughtiness of Mrs Beaumont the brutality of Captain Mirvan the selfconceit of Mrs Selwyn the affectation of Lady Louisa and the vulgarity of Madame Duvaleven to such a monster as that I would pay homage and pour forth adulation only to obtain one word one look from my adored Miss Anville
Sir Clement said I you are greatly mistaken if you suppose this duplicity of character recommends you to my good opinion But I must take this opportunity of begging you never more to talk to me in this strain
Oh Miss Anville your reproofs your coldness pierce me to the soul look upon me with less rigour and make me what you pleaseyou shall govern and direct all my actionsyou shall newform newmodel meI will not have even a wish but of your suggestion only deign to look upon me with pityif not with favour
Suffer me Sir said I very gravely to make use of this occasion to put a final conclusion to such expressions I entreat you never again to address me in a language so flighty and so unwelcome You have already given me great uneasiness and I must frankly assure you that if you do not desire to banish me from wherever you are you will adopt a very different style and conduct in future
I then rose and was going but he flung himself at my feet to prevent me exclaiming in a most passionate manner Good God Miss Anville what do you sayis it can it be possible that so unmoved that with such petrifying indifference you can tear from me even the remotest hope
I know not Sir said I endeavouring to disengage myself from him what hope you mean but I am sure that I never intended to give you any
You distract me cried he I cannot endure such scornI beseech you to have some moderation in your cruelty lest you make me desperatesay then that you pity meO fairest inexorable loveliest tyrantsay tell me at least that you pity me
Just then who should come in sight as if intending to pass by the arbour but Lord Orville Good Heaven how did I start and he the moment he saw me turned pale and was hastily retiringbut I called out Lord OrvilleSir Clement release melet go my hand
Sir Clement in some confusion suddenly rose but still grasped my hand Lord Orville who had turned back was again walking away but still struggling to disengage myself I called out Pray pray my Lord dont goSir Clement I insist upon your releasing me
Lord Orville then hastily approaching us said with great spirit
Sir Clement you cannot wish to detain Miss Anville by force
Neither my Lord cried Sir Clement proudly do I request the honour of your Lordships interference
However he let go my hand and I immediately ran into the house
I was now frightened to death lest Sir Clements mortified pride should provoke him to affront Lord Orville I therefore ran hastily to Mrs Selwyn and entreated her in a manner hardly to be understood to walk towards the arbour She asked no questions for she is quick as lightening in taking a hint but instantly hastened into the garden
Imagine my dear Sir how wretched I must be till I saw her return scarce could I restrain myself from running back however I checked my impatience and waited though in agonies till she came
And now my dear Sir I have a conversation to write the most interesting to me that I ever heard The comments and questions with which Mrs Selwyn interrupted her account I shall not mention for they are such as you may very easily suppose
Lord Orville and Sir Clement were both seated very quietly in the arbour and Mrs Selwyn standing still as soon as she was within a few yards of them heard Sir Clement say Your question my Lord alarms me and I can by no means answer it unless you will allow me to propose another
Undoubtedly Sir
You ask me my Lord what are my intentionsI should be very happy to be satisfied as to your Lordships
I have never Sir professed any
Here they were both for a few moments silent and then Sir Clement said To what my Lord must I then impute your desire of knowing mine
To an unaffected interest in Miss Anvilles welfare
Such an interest said Sir Clement drily is indeed very generous but except in a fathera brotheror a lover
Sir Clement interrupted his Lordship I know your inference and I acknowledge I have not the right of enquiry which any of those three titles bestow and yet I confess the warmest wishes to serve her and to see her happy Will you then excuse me if I take the liberty to repeat my question
Yes if your Lordship will excuse my repeating that I think it a rather extraordinary one
It may be so said Lord Orville but this young lady seems to be peculiarly situated she is very young very inexperienced yet appears to be left totally to her own direction She does not I believe see the dangers to which she is exposed and I will own to you I feel a strong desire to point them out
I dont rightly understand your Lordshipbut I think you cannot mean to prejudice her against me
Her sentiments of you Sir are as much unknown to me as your intentions towards her Perhaps were I acquainted with either my officiousness might be at an end but I presume not to ask upon what terms
Here he stopped and Sir Clement said You know my Lord I am not given to despair I am by no means such a puppy as to tell you I am upon sure ground however perseverance
You are then determined to perservere
I am my Lord
Pardon me then Sir Clement if I speak to you with freedom This young lady though she seems alone and in some measure unprotected is not entirely without friends she has been extremely well educated and accustomed to good company she has a natural love of virtue and a mind that might adorn any station however exalted is such a young lady Sir Clement a proper object to trifle withfor your principles excuse me Sir are well known
As to that my Lord let Miss Anville look to herself she has an excellent understanding and needs no counsellor
Her understanding is indeed excellent but she is too young for suspicion and has an artlessness of disposition I never saw equalled
My Lord cried Sir Clement warmly your praises make me doubt your disinterestedness and there exists not the man whom I would so unwillingly have for a rival as yourself But you must give me leave to say you have greatly deceived me in regard to this affair
How so Sir cried Lord Orville with equal warmth
You were pleased my Lord answered Sir Clement upon our first conversation concerning this young lady to speak to her in terms by no means suited to your present encomiums you said she was a poor weak ignorant girl and I had great reason to believe you had a most contemptuous opinion of her
It is very true said Lord Orville that I did not at our first acquaintance do justice to the merits of Miss Anville but I knew not then how new she was to the world at present however I am convinced that whatever might appear strange in her behaviour was simply the effect of inexperience timidity and a retired education for I find her informed sensible and intelligent She is not indeed like most modern young ladies to be known in half an hour her modest worth and fearful excellence require both time and encouragement to show themselves She does not beautiful as she is seize the soul by surprise but with more dangerous fascination she steals it almost imperceptibly
Enough my Lord cried Sir Clement your solicitude for her welfare is now sufficiently explained
My friendship and esteem returned Lord Orville I do not wish to disguise but assure yourself Sir Clement I should not have troubled you upon this subject had Miss Anville and I ever conversed but as friends However since you do not choose to avow your intentions we must drop the subject
My intentions cried he I will frankly own are hardly known to myself I think Miss Anville the loveliest of her sex and were I a marrying man she of all the women I have seen I would fix upon for a wife but I believe that not even the philosophy of your Lordship would recommend me to a connection of that sort with a girl of obscure birth whose only dowry is her beauty and who is evidently in a state of dependency
Sir Clement cried Lord Orville with some heat we will discuss this point no further we are both free agents and must act for ourselves
Here Mrs Selwyn fearing a surprise and finding my apprehensions of danger were groundless retired hastily into another walk and soon after came to give me this account
Good Heaven what a man is this Sir Clement So designing though so easy so deliberately artful though so flighty Greatly however is he mistaken all confident as he seems for the girl obscure poor dependent as she is far from wishing the honour of his alliance would not only now but always have rejected it
As to Lord Orvillebut I will not trust my pen to mention himtell me my dear sir what you think of himtell me if he is not the noblest of menand if you can either wonder at or blame my admiration
The idea of being seen immediately by either party after so singular a conversation was both awkward and distressing to me but I was obliged to appear at dinner Sir Clement I saw was absent and uneasy he watched me he watched Lord Orville and was evidently disturbed in his mind Whenever he spoke to me I turned from him with undisguised disdain for I am too much irritated against him to bear with his illmeant assiduities any longer
But not oncenot a moment did I dare meet the eyes of Lord Orville All consciousness myself I dreaded his penetration and directed mine every waybut towards his The rest of the day I never quitted Mrs Selwyn
Adieu my dear Sir tomorrow I expect your directions whether I am to return to Berry Hill or once more to visit London
LETTER LXXVI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Oct 6th
AND now my dearest Sir if the perturbation of my spirits will allow me I will finish my last letter from Clifton Hill This morning though I did not go down stairs early Lord Orville was the only person in the parlour when I entered it I felt no small confusion at seeing him alone after having so long and successfully avoided such a meeting As soon as the usual compliments were over I would have left the room but he stopped me by saying If I disturb you Miss Anville I am gone
My Lord said I rather embarrassed I did not mean to stay
I flattered myself cried he I should have had a moments conversation with you
I then turned back and he seemed himself in some perplexity but after a short pause You are very good said he to indulge my request I have indeed for some time past most ardently desired an opportunity of speaking to you
Again he paused but I said nothing so he went on
You allowed me Madam a few days since you allowed me to lay claim to your friendshipto interest myself in your affairsto call you by the affectionate title of sisterand the honour you did me no man could have been more sensible of I am ignorant therefore how I have been so unfortunate as to forfeit itbut at present all is changed you fly meyour averted eye shuns to meet mine and you sedulously avoid my conversation
I was extremely disconcerted at this grave and but too just accusation and I am sure I must look very simplebut I made no answer
You will not I hope continued he condemn me unheard if there is any thing I have doneor any thing I have neglected tell me I beseech you what and it shall be the whole study of my thoughts how to deserve your pardon
Oh my Lord cried I penetrated at once with shame and gratitude your too too great politeness oppresses meyou have done nothingI have never dreamt of offenceif there is any pardon to be asked it is rather for me than for you to ask it
You are all sweetness and condescension cried he and I flatter myself you will again allow me to claim those titles which I find myself so unable to forego Yet occupied as I am with an idea that gives me the greatest uneasiness I hope you will not think me impertinent if I still solicit still intreat nay implore you to tell me to what cause your late sudden and to me most painful reserve was owing
Indeed my Lord said I stammering I dontI cantindeed my Lord
I am sorry to distress you said he and ashamed to be so urgentyet I know not how to be satisfied while in ignoranceand the time when the change happened makes me apprehendmay I Miss Anville tell you what it makes me apprehend
Certainly my Lord
Tell me thenand pardon a question most essentially important to meHad or had not Sir Clement Willoughby any share in causing your inquietude
No my Lord answered I with firmness none in the world
A thousand thousand thanks cried he you have relieved me from a weight of conjecture which I supported very painfully But one thing more is it in any measure to Sir Clement that I may attribute the alteration in your behaviour to myself which I could not but observe began the very day after his arrival at the Hot Wells
To Sir Clement my Lord said I attribute nothing He is the last man in the world who would have any influence over my conduct
And will you then restore to me that share of confidence and favour with which you honoured me before he came
Just then to my great relieffor I knew not what to sayMrs
Beaumont opened the door and in a few minutes we went to breakfast
Lord Orville was all gaiety never did I see him more lively or more agreeable Very soon after Sir Clement Willoughby called to pay his respects he said to Mrs Beaumont I then came to my own room where indulging my reflections which now soothed and now alarmed me I remained very quietly till I received your most kind letter
Oh Sir how sweet are the prayers you offer for your Evelina how grateful to her are the blessings you pour upon her headYou commit me to my real parentAh Guardian Friend Protector of my youthby whom my helpless infancy was cherished my mind formed my very life preservedyou are the Parent my heart acknowledges and to you do I vow eternal duty gratitude and affection
I look forward to the approaching interview with more fear than hope but important as is this subject I am just now wholly engrossed with another which I must hasten to communicate
I immediately acquainted Mrs Selwyn with the purport of your letter She was charmed to find your opinion agreed with her own and settled that we should go to town tomorrow morning and a chaise is actually ordered to be here by one oclock
She then desired me to pack up my clothes and said she must go herself to make speeches and tell lies to Mrs Beaumont
When I went down stairs to dinner Lord Orville who was still in excellent spirits reproached me for secluding myself so much from the company He sat next mehe would sit next meat table and he might I am sure repeat what he once said of me before that he almost exhausted himself in fruitless endeavours to entertain me for indeed I was not to be entertained I was totally spiritless and dejected the idea of the approaching meetingand Oh Sir the idea of the approaching partinggave a heaviness to my heart that I could neither conquer nor repress I even regretted the half explanation that had passed and wished Lord Orville had supported his own reserve and suffered me to support mine
However when during dinner Mrs Beaumont spoke of our journey my gravity was no longer singular a cloud instantly overspread the countenance of Lord Orville and he became nearly as thoughtful and as silent as myself
We all went together to the drawingroom After a short and unentertaining conversation Mrs Selwyn said she must prepare for her journey and begged me to see for some books she had left in the parlour
And here while I was looking for them I was followed by Lord Orville He shut the door after he came in and approaching me with a look of anxiety said Is this true Miss Anville are you going
I believe so my Lord said I still looking for the books
So suddenly so unexpectedly must I lose you
No great loss my Lord cried I endeavouring to speak cheerfully
Is it possible said he gravely Miss Anville can doubt my sincerity
I cant imagine cried I what Mrs Selwyn has done with these books
Would to Heaven continued he I might flatter myself you would allow me to prove it
I must run up stairs cried I greatly confused and ask what she has done with them
You are going then cried he taking my hand and you give me not the smallest hope of your returnwill you not then my too lovely friendwill you not at least teach me with fortitude like your own to support your absence
My Lord cried I endeavouring to disengage my hand pray let me go
I will cried he to my inexpressible confusion dropping on one knee if you wish to leave me
O my Lord exclaimed I rise I beseech you risesuch a posture to mesurely your Lordship is not so cruel as to mock me
Mock you repeated he earnestly no I revere you I esteem and I admire you above all human beings you are the friend to whom my soul is attached as to its better half you are the most amiable the most perfect of women and you are dearer to me than language has the power of telling
I attempt not to describe my sensations at that moment I scarce breathed I doubted if I existedthe blood forsook my cheeks and my feet refused to sustain me Lord Orville hastily rising supported me to a chair upon which I sunk almost lifeless
For a few minutes we neither of us spoke and then seeing me recover Lord Orville though in terms hardly articulate intreated my pardon for his abruptness The moment my strength returned I attempted to rise but he would not permit me
I cannot write the scene that followed though every word is engraven on my heart but his protestations his expressions were too flattering for repetition nor would he in spite of my repeated efforts to leave him suffer me to escapein short my dear Sir I was not proof against his solicitationsand he drew from me the most sacred secret of my heart
I know not how long we were together but Lord Orville was upon his knees when the door was opened by Mrs SelwynTo tell you Sir the shame with which I overwhelmed would be impossibleI snatched my hand from Lord Orvillehe too started and rose and Mrs Selwyn for some instants stood facing us both in silence
At last My Lord said she sarcastically have you been so good as to help Miss Anville to look for my books
Yes Madam answered he attempting to rally and I hope we shall soon be able to find them
Your Lordship is extremely kind said she drily but I can by no means consent to take up any more of your time Then looking on the windowseat she presently found the books and added Come here are just three and so like the servants in the Drummer this important affair may give employment to us all She then presented one of them to Lord Orville another to me and taking a third herself with a most provoking look she left the room
I would instantly have followed her but Lord Orville who could not help laughing begged me to stay a minute as he had many important matters to discuss
No indeed my Lord I cannotperhaps I have already stayed too long
Does Miss Anville so soon repent her goodness
I scarce know what I do my LordI am quite bewildered
One hours conversation cried he will I hope compose your spirits and confirm my happiness When then may I hope to see you aloneshall you walk in the garden tomorrow before breakfast
No no my Lord you must not a second time reproach me with making an appointment
Do you then said he laughing reserve that honour only for
Mr Macartney
Mr Mccartney said I is poor and thinks himself obliged to me otherwise
Poverty cried he I will not plead but if being obliged to you has any weight who shall dispute my title to an appointment
My Lord I can stay no longerMrs Selwyn will lose all patience
Deprive her not of the pleasure of her conjecturesbut tell me are you under Mrs Selwyns care
Only for the present my Lord
Not a few are the questions I have to ask Miss Anville among them the most important is whether she depends wholly on herself or whether there is any other person for whose interest I must solicit
I hardly know my Lord I hardly know myself to whom I most belong
Suffer suffer me then cried he with warmth to hasten the time when that shall no longer admit a doubtwhen your grateful Orville may call you all his own
At length but with difficulty I broke from him I went however to my own room for I was too much agitated to follow Mrs Selwyn Good God my dear Sir what a scene surely the meeting for which I shall prepare tomorrow cannot so greatly affect me To be loved by Lord Orvilleto be the honoured choice of his noble heartmy happiness seemed too infinite to be borne and I wept even bitterly I wept from the excess of joy which overpowered me
In this state of almost painful felicity I continued till I was summoned to tea When I reentered the drawing room I rejoiced much to find it full of company as the confusion with which I met Lord Orville was rendered the less observable
Immediately after tea most of the company played at cardsand thentill supper time Lord Orville devoted himself wholly to me
He saw that my eyes were red and would not let me rest till he made me confess the cause and when though most reluctantly I had acknowledged my weakness I could with difficulty refrain from weeping again at the gratitude he expressed
He earnestly desired to know if my journey could not be postponed and when I no entreated permission to attend me to town
Oh my Lord cried I what a request
The sooner answered he I make my devotion to you in public the sooner I may expect from your delicacy you will convince the world you encourage no mere danglers
You teach me then my Lord the inference I might expect if
I complied
And can you wonder I should seek to hasten the happy time when no scruples no discretion will demand our separation and the most punctilious delicacy will rather promote than oppose my happiness in attending you
To this I was silent and he reurged his request
My Lord said I you ask what I have no power to grant This journey will deprive me of all right to act for myself
What does Miss Anville mean
I cannot now explain myself indeed if I could the task would be both painful and tedious
O Miss Anville cried he when may I hope to date the period of this mystery when flatter myself that my promised friend will indeed honour me with her confidence
My Lord said I I mean not to affect any mysterybut my affairs are so circumstanced that a long and most unhappy story can alone explain them However if a short suspense will give your Lordship any uneasiness
My beloved Miss Anville cried he eagerly pardon my impatienceYou shall tell me nothing you would wish to concealI will wait your own time for information and trust to your goodness for its speed
There is nothing my Lord I wish to concealto postpone an explanation is all I desire
He then requested that since I would not allow him to accompany me to town I would permit him to write to me and promise to answer his letters
A sudden recollection of the two letters which had already passed between us occurring to me I hastily answered No indeed my Lord
I am extremely sorry said he gravely that you think me too presumptuous I must own I had flattered myself that to soften the inquietude of an absence which seems attended by so many inexplicable circumstances would not have been to incur your displeasure This seriousness hurt me and I could not forbear saying Can you indeed desire my Lord that I should a second time expose myself by an unguarded readiness to write to you
A second time unguarded readiness repeated he you amaze me
Has your Lordship then quite forgot the foolish letter I was so imprudent as to send you when in town
I have not the least idea cried he of what you mean
Why then my Lord said I we had better let the subject drop
Impossible cried he I cannot rest without an explanation
And then he obliged me to speak very openly of both the letters but my dear Sir imagine my surprise when he assured me in the most solemn manner that far from having ever written me a single line he had never received seen or heard of my letter
This subject which caused mutual astonishment and perplexity to us both entirely engrossed us for the rest of the evening and he made me promise to show him the letter I had received in his name tomorrow morning that he might endeavour to discover the author
After supper the conversation became general
And now my dearest Sir may I not call for your congratulations upon the events of this day a day never to be recollected by me but with the most grateful joy I know how much you are inclined to think well of Lord Orville I cannot therefore apprehend that my frankness to him will displease you Perhaps the time is not very distant when your Evelinas choice may receive the sanction of her best friends judgment and approbationwhich seems now all she has to wish
In regard to the change in my situation which must first take place
surely I cannot be blamed for what has passed the partiality of Lord
Orville must not only reflect honour upon me but upon all to whom
I do or may belong
Adieu most dear Sir I will write again when I arrive at London
LETTER LXXVII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Clifton Oct 7th
YOU will see my dear Sir that I was mistaken in supposing I should write no more from this place where my residence now seems more uncertain than ever
This morning during breakfast Lord Orville took an opportunity to beg me in a low voice to allow him a moments conversation before I left Clifton May I hope added he that you will stroll into the garden after breakfast
I made no answer but I believe my looks gave no denial for indeed I much wished to be satisfied concerning the letter The moment therefore that I could quit the parlour I ran up stairs for my calash but before I reached my room Mrs Selwyn called after me If you are going to walk Miss Anville be so good as to bid Jenny bring down my hat and Ill accompany you
Very much disconcerted I turned into the drawingroom without making any answer and there I hoped to wait unseen till she had otherwise disposed of herself But in a few minutes the door opened and Sir Clement Willoughby entered
Starting at the sight of him in rising hastily I let drop the letter which I had brought for Lord Orvilles inspection and before I could recover it Sir Clement springing forward had it in his hand He was just presenting it to me and at the same time enquiring after my health when the signature caught his eye and he read aloud Orville
I endeavoured eagerly to snatch it from him but he would not permit me and holding it fast in a passionate manner exclaimed Good God Miss Anville is it possible you can value such a letter as this
The question surprised and confounded me and I was too much ashamed to answer him but finding he made an attempt to secure it I prevented him and vehemently demanded him to return it
Tell me first said he holding it above my reach tell me if you have since received any more letters from the same person
No indeed cried I never
And will you also sweetest of women promise that you never will receive any more Say that and you will make me the happiest of men
Sir Clement cried I greatly confused pray give me the letter
And will you not first satisfy my doubtswill you not relieve me from the torture of the most distracting suspensetell me but that the detested Orville has written to you no more
Sir Clement cried I angrily you have no right to make any conditionsso pray give me the letter directly
Why such solicitude about this hateful letter can it possibly deserve your eagerness tell me with truth with sincerity tell me does it really merit the least anxiety
No matter Sir cried I in great perplexity the letter is mine and therefore
I must conclude then said he that the letter deserves your utmost contemptbut that the name of Orville is sufficient to make you prize it
Sir Clement cried I colouring you are quiteyou are very muchthe letter is not
O Miss Anville cried he you blushyou stammerGreat Heaven it is then all as I feared
I know not cried I halffrightened what you mean but I beseech you to give me the letter and to compose yourself
The letter cried he gnashing his teeth you shall never see more You ought to have burnt it the moment you had read it And in an instant he tore it into a thousand pieces
Alarmed at a fury so indecently outrageous I would have run out of the room but he caught hold of my gown and cried Not yet not yet must you go I am but halfmad yet and you must stay to finish your work Tell me therefore does Orville know your fatal partialitySay yes added he trembling with passion and I will fly you for ever
For Heavens sake Sir Clement cried I release meif you do not you will force me to call for help
Call then cried he inexorable and most unfeeling girl call if you please and bid all the world witness your triumphbut could ten worlds obey your call I would not part from you till you had answered me Tell me then does Orville know you love him
At any other time an enquiry so gross would have given me inexpressible confusion but now the wildness of his manner terrified me and I only said Whatever you wish to know Sir Clement I will tell you another time but for the present I entreat you to let me go
Enough cried he I understand youthe art of Orville has prevailedcold inanimate phlegmatic as he is you have rendered him the most envied of menOne thing more and I have doneWill he marry you
What a question my cheeks glowed with indignation and I felt too proud to make any answer
I see I see how it is cried he after a short pause and I find I am undone for ever Then letting loose my gown he put his hand to his forehead and walked up and down the room in a hasty and agitated manner
Though now at liberty to go I had not the courage to leave him for his evident distress excited all my compassion And this was our situation when Lady Louisa Mr Coverley and Mrs Beaumont entered the room
Sir Clement Willoughby said the latter I beg your pardon for making you wait so long but
She had not time for another word Sir Clement too much disordered to know or care what he did snatched up his hat and brushing hastily past her flew down stairs and out of the house
And with him went my sincerest pity though I earnestly hope I shall see him no more But what my dear Sir am I to conclude from his strange speeches concerning the letter Does it not seem as if he was himself the author of it How else should he be so well acquainted with the contempt it merits Neither do I know another human being who could serve any interest by such a deception I remember too that just as I had given my own letter to the maid Sir Clement came into the shop probably he prevailed upon her by some bribery to give it to him and afterwards by the same means to deliver to me an answer of his own writing Indeed I can in no other manner account for this affair Oh Sir Clement were you not yourself unhappy I know not how I could pardon an artifice that has caused me so much uneasiness
His abrupt departure occasioned a kind of general consternation
Very extraordinary behavior this cried Mrs Beaumont
Egad said Mr Coverley the baronet has a mind to tip us a touch of the heroics this morning
I declare cried Miss Louisa I never saw any thing so monstrous in my life its quite abominableI fancy the mans madIm sure he has given me a shocking fright
Soon after Mrs Selwyn came up stairs with Lord Merton The former advancing hastily to me said Miss Anville have you an almanack
Meno Madam
Who has one then
Egad cried Mr Coverley I never bought one in my life it would make me quite melancholy to have such a timekeeper in my pocket I would as soon walk all day before an hourglass
You are in the right said Mrs Selwyn not to watch time lest you should be betrayed unawares into reflecting how you employ it
Egad Maam cried he if Time thought no more of me than I do of Time I believe I should bid defiance for one while to old age and wrinkles for deuce take me if ever I think about it at all
Pray Mr Coverley said Mrs Selwyn why do you think it necessary to tell me this so often
Often repeated he Egad Madam I dont know why I said it nowbut
Im sure I cant recollect that ever I owned as much before
Owned it before cried she why my dear Sir you own it all day long for every word every look every action proclaims it
I now not if he understood the full severity of her satire but he only turned off with a laugh and she then applied to Mr Lovel and asked if he had an almanack
Mr Lovel who always looks alarmed when she addresses him with some hesitation answered I assure you Maam I have no manner of antipathy to an almanacknone in the leastI assure youI dare say I have four or five
Four or fivepray may I ask what use you make of so many
Usereally Maam as to thatI dont make any particular use of them but one must have them to tell one the day of the monthIm sure else I should never keep it in my head
And does your time pass so smoothly unmarked that without an almanack you could not distinguish one day from another
Really Maam cried he colouring I dont see anything so very particular in having a few almanacks other people have them I believe as well as me
Dont be offended cried she I have but made a little digression All I want to know is the state of the moonfor if it is at the full I shall be saved a world of conjectures and know at once to what cause to attribute the inconsistencies I have witnessed this morning In the first place I heard Lord Orville excuse himself from going out because he had business of importance to transact at homeyet have I seen him sauntering alone in the garden this half hour Miss Anville on the other hand I invited to walk out with me and after seeking her every where round the house I find her quietly seated in the drawingroom And but a few minutes since Sir Clement Willoughby with even more than his usual politeness told me he was come to spend the morning herewhen just now I met him flying down stairs as if pursued by the Furies and far from repeating his compliments or making any excuse he did not even answer a question I asked him but rushed past me with the rapidity of a thief from a bailiff
I protest said Mrs Beaumont I cant think what he meant such rudeness from a man of any family is quite incomprehensible
My Lord cried Lady Louisa to Lord Merton do you know he did the same by meI was just going to ask him what was the matter but he ran past me so quick that I declare he quite dazzled my eyes You cant think my Lord how he frightened me I dare say I look as paledont I look very pale my Lord
Your Ladyship said Mr Lovel so well becomes the lilies that the roses might blush to see themselves so excelled
Pray Mr Lovel said Mrs Selwyn if the roses should blush how would you find it out
Egad cried Mr Coverley I suppose they must blush as the saying is like a blue dogfor they are red already
Prithee Jack said Lord Merton dont you pretend to talk about blushes that never knew what they were in your life
My Lord said Mrs Selwyn if experience alone can justify mentioning them what an admirable treatise upon the subject may we not expect from your Lordship
O pray Maam answered he stick to Jack Coverleyhes your only man for my part I confess I have a mortal aversion to arguments
O fie my Lord cried Mrs Selwyn a senator of the nation a member of the noblest parliament in the worldand yet neglect the art of oratory
Why faith my Lord said Mr Lovel I think in general your House is not much addicted to study we of the Lower House have indubitably most application and if I did not speak before a superior power bowing to Lord Merton I should presume to add we have likewise the most able speakers
Mr Lovel said Mrs Selwyn you deserve immortality for that discovery But for this observation and the confession of Lord Merton I protest that I should have supposed that a peer of the realm and an able logician were synonymous terms
Lord Merton turning upon his heel asked Lady Louisa if she would take the air before dinner
Really answered she I dont knowIm afraid its monstrous hot besides putting her hand to her forehead I ant half well its quite horrid to have such weak nervesthe least thing in the world discomposes me I declare that mans oddness has given me such a shockI dont know when I shall recover from it But Im a sad weak creaturedont you think I am my Lord
O by no means answered he your Ladyship is merely delicateand devil take me if ever I had the least passion for an Amazon
I have the honour to be quite of your Lordships opinion said Mr Lovel looking maliciously at Mrs Selwyn for I have an insuperable aversion to strength either of body or mind in a female
Faith and so have I said Mr Coverley for egad Id as soon see a woman chop wood as hear her chop logic
So would every man in his senses said Lord Merton for a woman wants nothing to recommend her but beauty and goodnature in everything else she is either impertinent or unnatural For my part deuce take me if ever I wish to hear a word of sense from a woman as long as I live
It has always been agreed said Mrs Selwyn looking round her with the utmost contempt that no man ought to be connected with a woman whose understanding is superior to his own Now I very much fear that to accommodate all this good company according to such a rule would be utterly impracticable unless we should choose subjects from Swifts hospital of idiots
How many enemies my dear Sir does this unbounded severity excite Lord Merton however only whistled Mr Coverley sang and Mr Lovel after biting his lips said Pon honour that ladyif she was not a ladyI should be half tempted to observethat there is somethingin such severitythat is rather I must sayrather oddish
Just then a servant brought Lady Louisa a note upon a waiter which is a ceremony always used to her Ladyship and I took the opportunity of this interruption to the conversation to steal out of the room
I went immediately to the parlour which I found quite empty for I did not dare walk in the garden after what Mrs Selwyn had said
In a few minutes a servant announced Mr Macartney saying as he entered the room that he would acquaint Lord Orville he was there
Mr Macartney rejoiced much at finding me alone He told me he had taken the liberty to enquire for Lord Orville by way of pretext for coming to the house
I then very eagerly enquired if he had seen his father
I have Madam said he and the generous compassion you have shown made me hasten to acquaint you that upon reading my unhappy mothers letter he did not hesitate to acknowledge me
Good God cried I with no little emotion how similar are our circumstances And did he receive you kindly
I could not Madam expect that he would the cruel transaction which obliged me to fly to Paris was recent in his memory
Andhave you seen the young lady
No Madam said he mournfully I was forbid her sight
Forbid her sightand why
Partly perhaps from prudenceand partly from the remains of a resentment which will not easily subside I only requested leave to acquaint her with my relationship and to be allowed to call her sisterbut it was denied me You have no sister said Sir John you must forget her existence Hard and vain command
You haveyou have a sister cried I from an impulse of pity which I could not repress a sister who is most warmly interested in your welfare and who only wants opportunity to manifest her friendship and regard
Gracious Heaven cried he what does Miss Anville mean
Anville said I is not my real name Sir John Belmont is my fatherhe is yoursand I am your sisterYou see therefore the claim we mutually have to each others regard we are not merely bound by the ties of friendship but by those of blood I feel for you already all the affection of a sister I felt it indeed before I knew I was oneWhy my dear brother do you not speakdo you hesitate to acknowledge me
I am so lost in astonishment cried he that I know not if I hear right
I have then found a brother cried I holding out my hand and he will not own me
Own youOh Madam cried he accepting my offered hand is it indeed possible you can own me a poor wretched adventurer who so lately had no support but from your generositywhom your benevolence snatched from utter destructionCan youOh Madam can you indeed and without a blush condescend to own such an outcast for a brother
Oh forbear forbear cried I is this language proper for a sister are we not reciprocally bound to each otherWill you not suffer me to expect from you all the good offices in your powerBut tell me where is our father at present
At the HotWells Madam he arrived there yesterday morning
I would have proceeded with further questions but the entrance of
Lord Orville prevented me The moment he saw us he started and
would have retreated but drawing my hand from Mr Macartneys
I begged him to come in
For a few moments we were all silent and I believe all in equal confusion Mr Macartney however recollecting himself said I hope your Lordship will forgive the liberty I have taken in making use of your name
Lord Orville rather coldly bowed but said nothing
Again we were all silent and then Mr Macartney took leave
I fancy said Lord Orville when he was gone I have shortened Mr
Macartneys visit
No my Lord not at all
I had presumed said he with some hesitation I should have seen Miss Anville in the gardenbut I knew not she was so much better engaged
Before I could answer a servant came to tell me the chaise was ready and that Mrs Selwyn was enquiring for me
I will wait on her immediately cried I and away I was running but Lord Orville stopping me said with great emotion Is it thus Miss Anville you leave me
My Lord cried I how can I help itperhaps soon some better opportunity may offer
Good Heaven cried he do you take me for a Stoic what better opportunity may I hope foris not the chaise comeare you not going have you even deigned to tell me whither
My journey my Lord will now be deferred Mr Macartney has brought me intelligence which renders it at present unnecessary
Mr Macartney said he gravely seems to have great influenceyet he is a very young counsellor
Is it possible my Lord Mr Macartney can give you the least uneasiness
My dearest Miss Anville said he taking my hand I see and I adore the purity of your mind superior as it is to all little arts and all apprehensions of suspicion and I should do myself as well as you injustice if I were capable of harbouring the smallest doubts of that goodness which makes you mine forever nevertheless pardon me if I own myself surprisednay alarmed at these frequent meetings with so young a man as Mr Macartney
My Lord cried I eager to clear myself Mr Macartney is my brother
Your brother you amaze meWhat strange mystery then makes his relationship a secret
Just then Mrs Selwyn opened the door O you are here cried she Pray is my Lord so kind as to assist you in preparing for your journey or in retarding it
I should be most happy said Lord Orville smiling if it were in my power to do the latter
I then acquainted her with Mr Macartneys communication
She immediately ordered the chaise away and then took me into her own room to consider what should be done
A few minutes sufficed to determine her and she wrote the following note
To Sir John Belmont Bart
MRS SELWYN presents her compliments to Sir John Belmont and if he is at leisure will be glad to wait on him this morning upon business of importance
She then ordered her man to enquire at the pumproom for a direction and went herself to Mrs Beaumont to apologize for deferring her journey
An answer was presently returned that Sir John would be glad to see her
She would have had me immediately accompany her to the HotWells but I entreated her to spare me the distress of so abrupt an introduction and to pave the way for my reception She consented rather reluctantly and attended only by her servant walked to the Wells
She was not absent two hours yet so miserably did time seem to linger that I thought a thousand accidents had happened and feared she would never return I passed the whole time in my own room for I was too much agitated even to converse with Lord Orville
The instant that from my window I saw her returning I flew down stairs and met her in the garden
We both walked to the arbour
Her looks in which both disappointment and anger were expressed presently announced to me the failure of her embassy Finding that she did not speak I asked her in a faltering voice whether or not I had a father
You have not my dear said she abruptly
Very well Madam said I with tolerable calmness let the chaise then be ordered againI will go to Berry Hilland there I trust I shall still find one
It was some time ere she could give or I could hear the account of her visit and then she related it in a hasty manner yet I believe I can recollect every word
I found Sir John alone He received me with the utmost politeness I did not keep him a moment in suspense as to the purport of my visit But I had no sooner made it known than with a supercilious smile he said And have you Madam been prevailed upon to revive that ridiculous old story Ridiculous I told him was a term which he would find no one else do him the favour to make use of in speaking of the horrible actions belonging to the old story he made so light of actions continued I which would dye still deeper the black annals of Nero or Caligula He attempted in vain to rally for I pursued him with all the severity in my power and ceased not painting the enormity of his crime till I stung him to the quick and in a voice of passion and impatience he said No more Madamthis is not a subject upon which I need a monitor Make then cried I the only reparation in your powerYour daughter is now at Clifton send for her hither and in the face of the world proclaim the legitimacy of her birth and clear the reputation of your injured wife Madam said he you are much mistaken if you suppose I waited for the honour of this visit before I did what little justice now depends upon me to the memory of that unfortunate woman her daughter has been my care from her infancy I have taken her into my house she bears my name and she will be my sole heiress For some time this assertion appeared so absurd that I only laughed at it but at last he assured me I had myself been imposed upon for that very woman who attended Lady Belmont in her last illness conveyed the child to him while he was in London before she was a year old Unwilling he added at that time to confirm the rumour of my being married I sent the woman with the child to France as soon as she was old enough I put her into a convent where she has been properly educated and now I have taken her home I have acknowledged her for my lawful child and paid at length to the memory of her unhappy mother a tribute of fame which has made me wish to hide myself hereafter from all the world This whole story sounded so improbable that I did not scruple to tell him I discredited every word He then rung his bell and enquiring if his hairdresser was come said he was sorry to leave me but that if I would favour him with my company tomorrow he would do himself the honour of introducing Miss Belmont to me instead of troubling me to introduce her to him I rose in great indignation and assuring him I would make his conduct as public as it was infamousI left the house
Good Heaven how strange the recital how incomprehensible an affair The Miss Belmont then who is actually at Bristol passes for the daughter of my unhappy motherpasses in short for your Evelina Who she can be or what this tale can mean I have not any idea
Mrs Selwyn soon after left me to my own reflections Indeed they were not very pleasant Quietly as I had borne her relation the moment I was alone I felt most bitterly both the disgrace and sorrow of a rejection so cruelly inexplicable
I know not how long I might have continued in this situation had
I not been awakened from my melancholy reverie by the voice of Lord
Orville May I come in cried he or shall I interrupt you
I was silent and he seated himself next me
I fear he continued Miss Anville will think I persecute her yet so much as I have to say and so much as I wish to hear with so few opportunities for either she cannot wonderand I hope she will not be offendedthat I seize with such avidity every moment in my power to converse with her You are grave added he taking my hand I hope the pleasure it gives to me will not be a subject of pain to you You are silentSomething I am sure has afflicted youwould to Heaven I were able to console youWould to Heaven I were worthy to participate in your sorrows
My heart was too full to bear this kindness and I could only answer by my tears Good Heaven cried he how you alarm meMy love my sweet Miss Anville deny me no longer to be the sharer of your griefstell me at least that you have not withdrawn your esteemthat you do not repent the goodness you have shown methat you still think me the same grateful Orville whose heart you have deigned to accept
Oh my Lord cried I your generosity overpowers me And I wept like an infant For now that all my hopes of being acknowledged seemed finally crushed I felt the nobleness of his disinterested regard so forcibly that I could scarce breathe under the weight of gratitude which oppressed me
He seemed greatly shocked and in terms the most flattering the most respectfully tender he at once soothed my distress and urged me to tell him its cause
My Lord said I when I was able to speak you little know what an outcast you have honoured with your choicea child of bountyan orphan from infancydependant even for subsistence dependent upon the kindness of compassionRejected by my natural friendsdisowned for ever by my nearest relationOh my Lord so circumstanced can I deserve the distinction with which you honour me No no I feel the inequality too painfullyyou must leave me my Lord you must suffer me to return to obscurity and there in the bosom of my first best my only friendI will pour forth all the grief of my heartwhile you my Lord must seek elsewhere
I could not proceed my whole soul recoiled against the charge I would have given and my voice refused to utter it
Never cried he warmly my heart is yours and I swear to you an attachment eternalYou prepare me indeed for a tale of horror and I am almost breathless with expectationbut so firm is my conviction that whatever are your misfortunes to have merited them is not of the number that I feel myself more strongly more invincibly devoted to you than everTell me but where I may find this noble friend whose virtues you have already taught me to reverenceand I will fly to obtain his consent and intercession that henceforward our fates my be indissolubly unitedand then shall it be the sole study of my life to endeavor to soften your pastand guard you from future misfortunes
I had just raised my eyes to answer this most generous of men when the first object they met was Mrs Selwyn
So my dear cried she what still courting the rural shadesI thought ere now you would have been satiated with this retired seat and I have been seeking you all over the house But I find the only way to meet with youis to enquire for Lord Orville However dont let me disturb your meditation you are possibly planning some pastoral dialogue
And with this provoking speech she walked on
In the greatest confusion I was quitting the arbour when Lord Orville said Permit me to follow Mrs Selwynit is time to put an end to all impertinent conjectures will you allow me to speak to her openly
I assented in silence and he left me
I then went to my own room where I continued till I was summoned to dinner after which Mrs Selwyn invited me to hers
The moment she had shut the door Your Ladyship said she will
I hope be seated
Maam cried I staring
O the sweet innocent So you dont know what I meanbut my dear my sole view is to accustom you a little to your dignity elect lest when you are addressed by your title you should look another way from an apprehension of listening to a discourse not meant for you to hear
Having in this manner diverted herself with my confusion till her raillery was almost exhausted she congratulated me very seriously upon the partiality of Lord Orville and painted to me in the strongest terms his disinterested desire of being married to me immediately She had told him she said my whole story and yet he was willing nay eager that our union should take place of any further application to my family Now my dear continued she I advise you by all means to marry him directly nothing can be more precarious than our success with Sir John and the young men of this age are not to be trusted with too much time for deliberation where their interests are concerned
Good God Madam cried I do you think I would hurry Lord Orville
Well do as you will said she luckily you have an excellent subject for Quixotismotherwise this delay might prove your ruin but Lord Orville is almost as romantic as if he had been born and bred at Berry Hill
She then proposed as no better expedient seemed likely to be suggested that I should accompany her at once in her visit to the HotWells tomorrow morning
The very idea made me tremble yet she represented so strongly the necessity of pursuing this unhappy affair with spirit or giving it totally up that wanting her force of argument I was almost obliged to yield to her proposal
In the evening we all walked in the garden and Lord Orville who never quitted my side told me he had been listening to a tale which though it had removed the perplexities that had so long tormented him had penetrated him with sorrow and compassion I acquainted him with Mrs Selwyns plan for tomorrow and confessed the extreme terror it gave me He then in a manner almost unanswerable besought me to leave to him the conduct of the affair by consenting to be his before an interview took place
I could not but acknowledge my sense of his generosity but I told him I was wholly dependent upon you and that I was certain your opinion would be the same as mine which was that it would be highly improper I should dispose of myself for ever so very near the time which must finally decide by whose authority I ought to be guided The subject of this dreaded meeting with the thousand conjectures and apprehensions to which it gives birth employed all our conversation then as it has all my thoughts since
Heaven only knows how I shall support myself when the long expectedthe wishedyet terrible moment arrives that will prostrate me at the feet of the nearest the most reverenced of all relations whom my heart yearns to know and longs to love
LETTER LXXVIII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Oct 9th
I COULD not write yesterday so violent was the agitation of my mindbut I will not now lose a moment till I have hastened to my best friend an account of the transactions of a day I can never recollect without emotion
Mrs Selwyn determined upon sending no message Lest said she Sir John fatigued with the very idea of my reproaches should endeavour to avoid a meeting He cannot but see who you are whether he will do you justice or not
We went early and in Mrs Beaumonts chariot into which Lord Orville uttering words of the kindest encouragement handed us both
My uneasiness during the ride was excessive but when we stopped at the door I was almost senseless with terror the meeting at last was not so dreadful as that moment I believe I was carried into the house but I scarce recollect what was done with me however I know we remained some time in the parlour before Mrs Selwyn could send any message up stairs
When I was somewhat recovered I intreated her to let me return home assuring her I felt myself quite unequal to supporting the interview
No said she you must stay now your fears will but gain strength by delay and we must not have such a shock as this repeated Then turning to the servant she sent up her name
An answer was brought that he was going out in great haste but would attend her immediately I turned so sick that Mrs Selwyn was apprehensive I should have fainted and opening a door which led to an inner apartment she begged me to wait there till I was somewhat composed and till she had prepared for my reception
Glad of every moments reprieve I willingly agreed to the proposal and Mrs Selwyn had but just time to shut me in before her presence was necessary
The voice of a father Oh dear and revered namewhich then for the first time struck my ears affected me in a manner I cannot describe though it was only employed in giving orders to a servant as he came down stairs
Then entering the parlour I heard him say I am sorry Madam I made you wait but I have an engagement which now calls me away however if you have any commands for me I shall be glad of the honour of your company some other time
I am come Sir said Mrs Selwyn to introduce your daughter to you
I am infinitely obliged to you answered he but I have just had the satisfaction of breakfasting with her Maam your most obedient
You refuse then to see her
I am much indebted to you Madam for this desire of increasing my family but you must excuse me if I decline taking advantage of it I have already a daughter to whom I owe everything and it is not three days since that I had the pleasure of discovering a son how many more sons and daughters may be brought to me I am yet to learn but I am already perfectly satisfied with the size of my family
Had you a thousand children Sir John said Mrs Selwyn this only one of which Lady Belmont was the mother ought to be most distinguished and far from avoiding her sight you should thank your stars in humble gratitude that there yet remains in your power the smallest opportunity of doing the injured wife you have destroyed the poor justice of acknowledging her child
I am very unwilling Madam answered he to enter into any discussion of this point but you are determined to compel me to speak There lives not at this time the human being who should talk to me of the regret due to the memory of that illfated woman no one can feel it so severely as myself but let me nevertheless assure you I have already done all that remained in my power to prove the respect she merited from me her child I have educated and owned for my lawful heiress if madam you can suggest to me any other means by which I may more fully do her justice and more clearly manifest her innocence name them to me and though they should wound my character still deeper I will perform them readily
All this sounds vastly well returned Mrs Selwyn but I must own it is rather too enigmatical for my faculties of comprehension You can however have no objection to seeing this young lady
None in the world
Come forth then my dear cried she opening the door come forth and see your father Then taking my trembling hand she led me forward I would have withdrawn it and retreated but as he advanced instantly towards me I found myself already before him
What a moment for your Evelinaan involuntary scream escaped me and covering my face with my hands I sunk on the floor
He had however seen me first for in a voice scarce articulate he exclaimed My God does Caroline Evelyn still live
Mrs Selwyn said something but I could not listen to her and in a few minutes he added Lift up thy headif my sight has not blasted theelift up thy head thou image of my long lost Caroline
Affected beyond measure I half arose and embraced his knees while yet on my own
Yes yes cried he looking earnestly in my face I see I see thou art her child she livesshe breathesshe is present to my viewOh God that she indeed livedGo child go added he wildly starting and pushing me from him take her away MadamI cannot bear to look at her And then breaking hastily from me he rushed out of the room
Speechless motionless myself I attempted not to stop him but Mrs Selwyn hastening after him caught hold of his arm Leave me Madam cried he with quickness and take care of the poor childbid her not think me unkind tell her I would at this moment plunge a dagger in my heart to serve her but she has set my brain on fire and I can see her no more Then with a violence almost frantic he ran up stairs
Oh Sir had I not indeed cause to dread this interviewan interview so unspeakably painful and afflicting to us both Mrs Selwyn would have immediately returned to Clifton but I entreated her to wait some time in the hope that my unhappy father when his first emotion was over would again bear me in his sight However he soon after sent his servant to enquire how I did and to tell Mrs Selwyn he was much indisposed but would hope for the honour of seeing her tomorrow at any time she would please to appoint
She fixed upon ten oclock in the morning and then with a heavy
heart I
got into the chariot Those afflicting words I can see her no
more were never a moment absent from my mind
Yet the sight of Lord Orville who handed us from the carriage gave some relief to the sadness of my thoughts I could not however enter upon the painful subject but begging Mrs Selwyn to satisfy him I went to my own room
As soon as I communicated to the good Mrs Clinton the present
situation of
my affairs an idea occurred to her which seemed to clear up all the
mystery of my having been so long disowned
The woman she says who attended my evertoberegretted mother in her last illness and who nursed me the first four months of my life soon after being discharged from your house left Berry Hill entirely with her baby who was but six weeks older than myself Mrs Clinton remembers that her quitting the place appeared at the time very extraordinary to the neighbours but as she was never heard of afterwards she was by degrees quite forgotten
The moment this was mentioned it struck Mrs Selwyn as well as
Mrs Clinton
herself that my father had been imposed upon and that the nurse who
said she had brought his child to him had in fact carried her own
The name by which I was known the secrecy observed in regard to my family and the retirement in which I lived all conspired to render this scheme however daring and fraudulent by no means impracticable and in short the idea was no sooner started than conviction seemed to follow it
Mrs Selwyn determined immediately to discover the truth or mistake
of this
conjecture therefore the moment she had dined she walked to the
Hot Wells attended by Mrs Clinton
I waited in my room till her return and then heard the following
account of
her visit
She found my poor father in great agitation She immediately informed him of the occasion of her so speedy return and of her suspicions of the woman who had pretended to convey to him his child Interrupting her with quickness he said he had just sent her from his presence that the certainty I carried in my countenance of my real birth made him the moment he had recovered from a surprise which had almost deprived him of reason suspect himself the imposition she mentioned He had therefore sent for the woman and questioned her with the utmost austerity she turned pale and was extremely embarrassed but still she persisted in affirming that she had really brought him the daughter of Lady Belmont His perplexity he said almost distracted him he had always observed that his daughter bore no resemblance to either of her parents but as he had never doubted the veracity of the nurse this circumstance did not give birth to any suspicion
At Mrs Selwyns desire the woman was again called and interrogated with equal art and severity her confusion was evident and her answers often contradictory yet she still declared she was no impostor We will see that in a minute said Mrs Selwyn and then desired Mrs Clinton might be called up stairs The poor wretch changing colour would have escaped out of the room but being prevented dropt on her knees and implored forgiveness A confession of the whole affair was then extorted from her
Doubtless my dear Sir you must remember Dame Green who was my first nurse The deceit she has practised was suggested she says by a conversation she overheard in which my unhappy mother besought you that if her child survived her you would take the sole care of its education and in particular if it should be a female you would by no means part with her in early life You not only consented she says but assured her you would even retire abroad with me yourself if my father should importunately demand me Her own child she said was then in her arms and she could not forbear wishing it were possible to give her the fortune which seemed so little valued for me This wish once raised was not easily suppressed on the contrary what at first appeared a mere idle desire in a short time seemed a feasible scheme Her husband was dead and she had little regard for any body but her child and in short having saved money for the journey she contrived to enquire a direction to my father and telling her neighbours she was going to settle in Devonshire she set out on her expedition
When Mrs Selwyn asked her how she dared perpetrate such a fraud she protested she had no ill designs but that as Miss would be never the worse for it she thought it pity nobody should be the better
Her success we are already acquainted with Indeed everything seemed to contribute towards it my father had no correspondent at Berry Hill the child was instantly sent to France where being brought up in as much retirement as myself nothing but accident could discover the fraud
And here let me indulge myself in observing and rejoicing to observe that the total neglect I thought I met with was not the effect of insensibility or unkindness but of imposition and error and that at the very time we concluded I was unnaturally rejected my deluded father meant to show me most favour and protection
He acknowledges that Lady Howards letter flung him into some perplexity he immediately communicated it to Dame Green who confessed it was the greatest shock she had ever received in her life yet she had the art and boldness to assert that Lady Howard must herself have been deceived and as she had from the beginning of her enterprise declared she had stolen away the child without your knowledge he concluded that some deceit was then intended him and this thought occasioned his abrupt answer
Dame Green owned that from the moment the journey to England was settled she gave herself up for lost All her hope was to have had her daughter married before it took place for which reason she had so much promoted Mr Macartneys addresses for though such a match was inadequate to the pretensions of Miss Belmont she well knew it was far superior to those her daughter could form after the discovery of her birth
My first enquiry was if this innocent daughter was yet acquainted with the affair No Mrs Selwyn said nor was any plan settled how to divulge it to her Poor unfortunate girl how hard is her fate She is entitled to my kindest offices and I shall always consider her as my sister
I then asked whether my father would again allow me to see him
Why no my dear not yet answered she he declares the sight
of you is
too much for him however we are to settle everything concerning
you tomorrow for this woman took up all our time today
This morning therefore she is again gone to the Hot Wells I am
waiting in
all impatience for her return but as I know you will be anxious
for the account this letter contains I will not delay sending it
LETTER LXXIX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION October 9th
HOW agitated my dear Sir is the present life of your Evelina every
day
seems important and one event only a prelude to another
Mrs Selwyn upon her return this morning from the Hot Wells
entering my
room very abruptly said Oh my dear I have terrible news for you
For me MaamGood God what now
Arm yourself cried she with all your Berry Hill philosophycon
over
every lesson of fortitude or resignation you ever learnt in your
lifefor knowyou are next week to be married to Lord Orville
Doubt astonishment and a kind of perturbation I cannot describe
made this
abrupt communication alarm me extremely and almost breathless
I could only exclaim Good God Madam what do you tell me
You may well be frightened my dear said she ironically
for really
there is something mighty terrific in becoming at once the wife of
the man you adoreand a Countess
I entreated her to spare her raillery and tell me her real
meaning She
could not prevail with herself to grant the first request though
she readily complied with the second
My poor father she said was still in the utmost uneasiness he entered upon his affairs with great openness and told her he was equally disturbed how to dispose either of the daughter he had discovered or the daughter he was now to give up the former he dreaded to trust himself with again beholding and the latter he knew not how to shock with the intelligence of her disgrace Mrs Selwyn then acquainted him with my situation in regard to Lord Orville this delighted him extremely and when he heard of his Lordships eagerness he said he was himself of opinion the sooner the union took place the better and in return he informed her of the affair of Mr Macartney And after a very long conversation continued Mrs Selwyn we agreed that the most eligible scheme for all parties would be to have both the real and the fictitious daughter married without delay Therefore if either of you have any inclination to pull caps for the title of Miss Belmont you must do it with all speed as next week will take from both of you all pretensions to it
Next weekdear Madam what a strange planwithout my being consultedwithout applying to Mr Villarswithout even the concurrence of Lord Orville
As to consulting you my dear it was out of all question because you know young ladies hearts and hands are always to be given with reluctanceas to Mr Villars it is sufficient we know him for your friendand as for Lord Orville he is a party concerned
A party concernedyou amaze me
Why yes for as I found our consultation likely to redound to his advantage I persuaded Sir John to send for him
Send for himGood God
Yes and Sir John agreed I told the servant that if he could not hear of his Lordship in the house he might be pretty certain of encountering him in the arbourWhy do you colour my dearWell he was with us in a moment I introduced him to Sir John and we proceeded to business
I am very very sorry for itLord Orville must himself think
this conduct
strangely precipitate
No my dear you are mistaken Lord Orville has too much good sense Everything was then discussed in a rational manner You are to be married privately though not secretly and then go to one of his Lordships country seats and poor little Miss Green and your brother who have no house of their own must go to one of Sir Johns
But why my dear Madam why all this haste why may we not be
allowed a
little longer time
I could give you a thousand reasons answered she but that I am tolerably certain two or three will be more than you can controvert even with all the logic of genuine coquetry In the first place you doubtless wish to quit the house of Mrs Beaumont to whose then can you with such propriety remove as to Lord Orvilles
Surely Madam cried I I am not more destitute now than when
I thought
myself an orphan
Your father my dear answered she is willing to save the little impostor as much of the mortification of her disgrace as is in his power now if you immediately take her place according to your right as Miss Belmont why not all that either of you can do for her will prevent her being eternally stigmatized as the bantling of Dame Green washwoman and wet nurse of Berry Hill Dorsetshire Now such a genealogy will not be very flattering even to Mr Macartney who alldismal as he is you will find by no means wanting in pride and selfconsequence
For the universe interrupted I I would not be accessary to the degradation you mention but surely Madam I may return to Berry Hill
By no means said she for though compassion may make us wish to save the poor girl the confusion of an immediate and public fall yet justice demands you should appear henceforward in no other light than that of Sir John Belmonts daughter Besides between friends I who know the world can see that half this prodigious delicacy for the little usurper is the mere result of selfinterest for while her affairs are hushed up Sir Johns you know are kept from being brought further to light Now the double marriage we have projected obviates all rational objections Sir John will give you immediately L30000 all settlements and so forth will be made for you in the name of Evelina BelmontMr Macartney will at the same time take poor Polly Green and yet at first it will only be generally known that a daughter of Sir John Belmont is married
In this manner though she did not convince me yet the quickness of her arguments silenced and perplexed me I enquired however if I might not be permitted to again see my father or whether I must regard myself as banished his presence for ever
My dear said she he does not know you he concludes that you
have been
brought up to detest him and therefore he is rather prepared to
dread than to love you
This answer made me very unhappy I wished most impatiently to remove his prejudice and endeavour by dutiful assiduity to engage his kindness yet knew not how to propose seeing him while conscious he wished to avoid me
This evening as soon as the company was engaged with cards Lord Orville exerted his utmost eloquence to reconcile me to this hasty plan but how was I startled when he told me that next Tuesday was the day appointed by my father to be the most important of my life
Next Tuesday repeated I quite out of breath Oh my Lord
My sweet Evelina said he the day which will make me the happiest of mortals would probably appear awful to you were it to be deferred a twelvemonth Mrs Selwyn has doubtless acquainted you with the many motives which independent of my eagerness require it to be speedy suffer therefore its acceleration and generously complete my felicity by endeavouring to suffer it without repugnance
Indeed my Lord I would not wilfully raise objections nor do I desire to appear insensible of the honour of your good opinionbut there is something in this planso very hastyso unreasonably precipitatebesides I shall have no time to hear from Berry Hilland believe me my Lord I should be for ever miserable were I in an affair so important to act without the sanction of Mr Villarss advice
He offered to wait on you himself but I told him I had rather write
to you
And then he proposed that instead of my immediately accompanying him
to Lincolnshire we should first pass a month at my native Berry Hill
This was indeed a grateful proposal to me and I listened to it with undisguised pleasure And in short I was obliged to consent to a compromise in merely deferring the day till Thursday He readily undertook to engage my fathers concurrence in this little delay and I besought him at the same time to make use of his influence to obtain me a second interview and to represent the deep concern I felt in being thus banished his sight
He would then have spoken of settlements but I assured him I
was almost
ignorant of the word
And now my dearest Sir what is your opinion of these hasty proceedings Believe me I half regret the simple facility with which I have suffered myself to be hurried into compliance and should you start but the smallest objection I will yet insist upon being allowed more time
I must now write a concise account of the state of my affairs
to Howard
Grove and to Madame Duval
Adieu dearest and most honoured Sir everything at present depends
upon your
single decision to which though I yield in trembling I yield
implicitly
LETTER LXXX
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Oct 11th
YESTERDAY morning as soon as breakfast was over Lord Orville went
to the
Hot Wells to wait upon my father with my double petition
Mrs Beaumont then in general terms proposed a walk in the
garden Mrs
Selwyn said she had letters to write but Lady Louisa rose to
accompany Mrs Beaumont
I had had some reason to imagine from the notice with which her Ladyship had honoured me during breakfast that her brother had acquainted her with my present situation and her behaviour now confirmed my conjectures for when I would have gone up stairs instead of suffering me as usual to pass disregarded she called after me with an affected surprise Miss Anville dont you walk with us
There seemed something so littleminded in this sudden change of conduct that from an involuntary motion of contempt I thanked her with a coldness like her own and declined her offer Yet observing that she blushed extremely at my refusal and recollecting she was sister to Lord Orville my indignation subsided and upon Mrs Beaumont repeating the invitation I accepted it
Our walk proved extremely dull Mrs Beaumont who never says much was more silent than usual Lady Louisa strove in vain to lay aside the restraint and distance she has hitherto preserved and as to me I was too conscious of the circumstances to which I owed their attention to feel either pride or pleasure from receiving it
Lord Orville was not long absent he joined us in the garden with a look of gaiety and good humour that revived us all You are just the party said he I wished to see together Will you Madam taking my hand allow me the honour of introducing you by your real name to two of my nearest relations Mrs Beaumont give me leave to present to you the daughter of Sir John Belmont a young lady who I am sure must long since have engaged your esteem and admiration though you were a stranger to her birth
My Lord said Mrs Beaumont graciously saluting me the young ladys rank in life your Lordships recommendation or her own merit would any one of them have been sufficient to have entitled her to my regard and I hope she has always met with that respect in my house which is so much her due though had I been sooner made acquainted with her family I should doubtless have better known how to have secured it
Miss Belmont said Lord Orville can receive no lustre from family whatever she may give to it Louisa you will I am sure be happy to make yourself an interest in the friendship of Miss Belmont whom I hope shortly kissing my hand and joining it with her Ladyships to have the happiness of presenting to you by yet another name and by the most endearing of all titles
I believe it would be difficult to say whose cheeks were at that moment of the deepest dye Lady Louisas or my own for the conscious pride with which she has hitherto slighted me gave to her an embarrassment which equalled the confusion that an introduction so unexpected gave to me She saluted me however and with a faint smile said I shall esteem myself very happy to profit by the honour of Miss Belmonts acquaintance
I only courtsied and we walked on but it was evident from the
little
surprise they expressed that they had been already informed of the
state of the affair
We were soon after joined by more company and Lord Orville then in a low voice took an opportunity to tell me the success of his visit In the first place Thursday was agreed to and in the second my father he said was much concerned to hear of my uneasiness sent me his blessing and complied with my request of seeing him with the same readiness he should agree to any other I could make Lord Orville therefore settled that I should wait upon him in the evening and at his particular request unaccompanied by Mrs Selwyn
This kind message and the prospect of so soon seeing him gave
me sensations
of mixed pleasure and pain which wholly occupied my mind till the
time of my going to the Hot Wells
Mrs Beaumont lent me her chariot and Lord Orville absolutely insisted upon attending me If you go alone said he Mrs Selwyn will certainly be offended but if you allow me to conduct you though she may give the freer scope to her raillery she cannot possibly be affronted and we had much better suffer her laughter than provoke her satire
Indeed I must own I had no reason to regret being so accompanied for his conversation supported my spirits from drooping and made the ride seem so short that we actually stopped at my fathers door before I knew we had proceeded ten yards
He handed me from the carriage and conducted me to the parlour
at the door
of which I was met by Mr Macartney Ah my dear brother cried I
how happy am I to see you here
He bowed and thanked me Lord Orville then holding out his hand
said
Mr Macartney I hope we shall be better acquainted I promise myself
much pleasure from cultivating your friendship
Your Lordship does me but too much honour answered Mr Macartney
But where cried I is my sister for so I must already call and always consider herI am afraid she avoids meyou must endeavour my dear brother to prepossess her in my favour and reconcile her to owning me
Oh Madam cried he you are all goodness and benevolence but
at present
I hope you will excuse her for I fear she has hardly fortitude
sufficient to see you in a short time perhaps
In a very short time then said Lord Orville I hope you will yourself introduce her and that we shall have the pleasure of wishing you both joyallow me my Evelina to say we and permit me in your name as well as my own to entreat that the first guests we shall have the happiness of receiving may be Mr and Mrs Macartney
A servant then came to beg I would walk up stairs
I besought Lord Orville to accompany me but he feared the displeasure of Sir John who had desired to see me alone He led me however to the foot of the stairs and made the kindest efforts to give me courage but indeed he did not succeed for the interview appeared to me in all its terrors and left me no feeling but apprehension
The moment I reached the landingplace the drawingroom door was
opened and
my father with a voice of kindness called out My child is it you
Yes Sir cried I springing forward and kneeling at his feet
it is your
child if you will own her
He knelt by my side and folding me in his arms Own thee repeated he yes my poor girl and Heaven knows with what bitter contrition Then raising both himself and me he brought me into the drawingroom shut the door and took me to the window where looking at me with great earnestness Poor unhappy Caroline cried he and to my inexpressible concern he burst into tears Need I tell you my dear Sir how mine flowed at the sight
I would again have embraced his knees but hurrying from me he flung himself upon a sofa and leaning his face on his arms seemed for some time absorbed in bitterness of grief
I ventured not to interrupt a sorrow I so much respected but waited in silence and at a distance till he recovered from its violence But then it seemed in a moment to give way to a kind of frantic fury for starting suddenly with a sternness which at once surprised and frightened me Child cried he hast thou yet sufficiently humbled thy fatherif thou hast be contented with this proof of my weakness and no longer force thyself into my presence
Thunderstruck by a command so unexpected I stood still and
speechless and
doubted whether my own ears did not deceive me
Oh go go cried he passionately in pityin compassionif
thou valuest my senses leave meand for ever
I will I will cried I greatly terrified and I moved hastily towards the door yet stopping when I reached it and almost involuntarily dropping on my knees Vouchsafe cried I Oh Sir vouchsafe but once to bless your daughter and her sight shall never more offend you
Alas cried he in a softened voice I am not worthy to bless theeI am not worthy to call thee daughterI am not worthy that the fair light of Heaven should visit my eyesOh God that I could but call back the time ere thou wast bornor else bury its remembrance in eternal oblivion
Would to Heaven cried I that the sight of me were less terrible
to you
that instead of irritating I could soothe your sorrowsOh Sir how
thankfully would I then prove my duty even at the hazard of my life
Are you so kind cried he gently come hither childrise EvelinaAlas it is for me to kneelnot youand I would kneelI would crawl upon the earthI would kiss the dustcould I by such submission obtain the forgiveness of the representative of the most injured of women
Oh Sir exclaimed I that you could but read my heartthat you could but see the filial tenderness and concern with which it overflowsyou would not then talk thusyou would not then banish me your presence and exclude me from your affection
Good God cried he is it then possible that you do not hate meCan the child of the wronged Caroline look atand not execrate me Wast thou not born to abhor and bred to curse me Did not thy mother bequeath thee her blessing on condition that thou shouldst detest and avoid me
Oh no no no cried I think not so unkindly of her nor so hardly of me I then took from my pocketbook her last letter and pressing it to my lips with a trembling hand and still upon my knees I held it out to him
Hastily snatching it from me Great Heaven cried he tis her
writingWhence comes thiswho gave it youwhy had I it not sooner
I made no answer his vehemence intimidated me and I ventured not
to move
from the suppliant posture in which I had put myself
He went from me to the window where his eyes were for some time rivetted upon the direction of the letter though his hand shook so violently he could hardly hold it Then bringing it to me Open itcried hefor I cannot
I had myself hardly strength to obey him but when I had he took
it back
and walked hastily up and down the room as if dreading to read it At
length turning to me Do you know cried he its contents
No Sir answered I it has never been unsealed
He then again went to the window and began reading Having hastily run it over he cast up his eyes with a look of desperation the letter fell from his hand and he exclaimed Yes thou art saintedthou art blessedand I am cursed for ever He continued some time fixed in this melancholy position after which casting himself with violence upon the ground Oh wretch cried he unworthy life and light in what dungeon canst thou hide thy head
I could restrain myself no longer I rose and went to him I did
not dare
speak but with pity and concern unutterable I wept and hung
over him
Soon after starting up he again seized the letter exclaiming Acknowledge thee Carolineyes with my hearts best blood would I acknowledge theeOh that thou couldst witness the agony of my soulTen thousand daggers could not have wounded me like this letter
Then after again reading it Evelina he cried she charges me
to receive
theewilt thou in obedience to her will own for thy father the
destroyer of thy mother
What a dreadful questionI shuddered but could not speak
To clear her fame and receive her child continued he looking stedfastly at the letter are the conditions upon which she leaves me her forgiveness her fame I have already clearedand Oh how willingly would I take her child to my bosom fold her to my heartcall upon her to mitigate my anguish and pour the balm of comfort on my wounds were I not conscious I deserve not to receive it and that all my affliction is the result of my own guilt
It was in vain I attempted to speak horror and grief took from me
all power
of utterance
He then read aloud from the letter Look not like thy unfortunate mother Sweet soul with what bitterness of spirit hast thou writtenCome hither Evelina Gracious Heaven looking earnestly at me never was likeness more strikingthe eyesthe facethe formOh my child my child Imagine Sirfor I can never describe my feelings when I saw him sink upon his knees before me Oh dear resemblance of thy murdered motherOh all that remains of the most injured of women behold thy father at thy feetbending thus lowly to implore you would not hate himOh then thou representative of my departed wife speak to me in her name and say that the remorse which tears my soul tortures me not in vain
Oh rise rise my beloved father cried I attempting to assist
him I
cannot bear to see you thus reverse not the law of nature rise
yourself and bless your kneeling daughter
May Heaven bless thee my childcried he for I dare not He then rose and embracing me most affectionately added I see I see that thou art all kindness softness and tenderness I need not have feared thee thou art all the fondest father could wish and I will try to frame my mind to less painful sensations at thy sight Perhaps the time may come when I may know the comfort of such a daughterat present I am only fit to be alone dreadful as are my reflections they ought merely to torment myselfAdieu my childbe not angryI cannot stay with theeOh Evelina thy countenance is a dagger to my heartjust so thy mother lookedjust so
Tears and sighs seemed to choak himand waving his hand he would have left mebut clinging to him Oh Sir cried I will you so soon abandon meam I again an orphanOh my dear my longlost father leave me not I beseech you take pity on your child and rob her not of the parent she so fondly hoped would cherish her
You know not what you ask cried he the emotions which now rend my soul are more than my reason can endure suffer me then to leave youimpute it not to unkindness but think of me as well as thou canst Lord Orville has behaved noblyI believe he will make thee happy Then again embracing me God bless thee my dear child cried he God bless thee my Evelinaendeavour to loveat least not to hate meand to make me an interest in thy filial bosom by thinking of me as thy father
I could not speak I kissed his hands on my knees and then with
yet more
emotion he again blessed me and hurried out of the roomleaving
me almost drowned in tears
Oh Sir all goodness as you are how much will you feel for your
Evelina
during a scene of such agitation I pray Heaven to accept the tribute
of his remorse and restore him to tranquillity
When I was sufficiently composed to return to the parlour I found Lord Orville waiting for me with the utmost anxietyand then a new scene of emotion though of a far different nature awaited me for I learned by Mr Macartney that this noblest of men had insisted the solong supposed Miss Belmont should be considered indeed as my sister and as the coheiress of my father though not in law in justice he says she ought ever to be treated as the daughter of Sir John Belmont
Oh Lord Orvilleit shall be the sole study of my happy life
to express
better than by words the sense I have of your exalted benevolence
and greatness of mind
LETTER LXXXI
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Clifton Oct 12th
THIS morning early I received the following letter from Sir Clement
Willoughby
To Miss Anville
I HAVE this moment received intelligence that preparations
are actually making for your marriage with Lord Orville
Imagine not that I write with the imbecile idea of
rendering those
preparations abortive No I am not so mad My sole view is
to explain the motive of my conduct in a particular instance
and to obviate the accusation of treachery which may be laid
to my charge
My unguarded behaviour when I last saw you has probably
already
acquainted you that the letter I then saw you reading was
written by myself For your further satisfaction let me have
the honour of informing you that the letter you had designed
for Lord Orville had fallen into my hands
However I may have been urged on by a passion the most
violent that
ever warmed the heart of man I can by no means calmly submit
to be stigmatized for an action seemingly so dishonourable
and it is for this reason that I trouble you with this
justification
Lord Orvillethe happy Orville whom you are so ready to blesshad made me believe he loved you notnay that he held you in contempt
Such were my thoughts of his sentiments of you when I got possession of the letter you meant to send him I pretend not to vindicate either the means I used to obtain it or the action of breaking the seal but I was impelled by an impetuous curiosity to discover the terms upon which you wrote to him
The letter however was wholly unintelligible to me
and the
perusal of it only added to my perplexity
A tame suspense I was not born to endure and I determined
to clear
my doubts at all hazards and events
I answered it therefore in Orvilles name
The views which I am now going to acknowledge must
infallibly
incur your displeasureyet I scorn all palliation
Briefly then I concealed your letter to prevent a
discovery of
your capacity and I wrote you an answer which I hoped would
prevent your wishing for any other
I am well aware of every thing which can be said upon
this subject
Lord Orville will possibly think himself illused but I am
extremely indifferent as to his opinion nor do I now write
by way of offering any apology to him but merely to make
known to yourself the reasons by which I have been governed
I intend to set off next week for the Continent Should his Lordship have any commands for me in the mean time I shall be glad to receive them I say not this by way of defianceI should blush to be suspected of so doing through an indirect channel but simply that if you show him this letter he may know I dare defend as well as excuse my conduct CLEMENT WILLOUGHBY
What a strange letter how proud and how piqued does its writer appear To what alternate meanness and rashness do the passions lead when reason and selfdenial do not oppose them Sir Clement is conscious he has acted dishonourably yet the same unbridled vehemence which urged him to gratify a blameable curiosity will sooner prompt him to risk his life than confess his misconduct The rudeness of his manner of writing to me springs from the same cause the proof which he has received of my indifference to him has stung him to the soul and he has neither the delicacy nor forbearance to disguise his displeasure
I determined not to show this letter to Lord Orville and thought
it most
prudent to let Sir Clement know I should not I therefore wrote the
following note
To Sir Clement Willoughby
SIR
The letter you have been pleased to address to me is
so little
calculated to afford Lord Orville any satisfaction that you
may depend upon my carefully keeping it from his sight I will
bear you no resentment for what is past but I most earnestly
intreat nay implore that you will not write again while in
your present frame of mind by any channel direct or indirect
I hope you will have much pleasure in your promised
expedition and
I beg leave to assure you of my good wishes
Not knowing by what name to sign I was obliged to send it without any
The preparations which Sir Clement mentions go on just as if your consent were arrived it is in vain that I expostulate Lord Orville says should any objections be raised all shall be given up but that as his hopes forbid him to expect any he must proceed as if already assured of your concurrence
We have had this afternoon a most interesting conversation in which we have traced our sentiments of each other from our first acquaintance I have made him confess how ill he thought of me upon my foolish giddiness at Mrs Stanleys ball but he flatters me with assurances that every succeeding time he saw me I appeared to something less and less disadvantage
When I expressed my amazement that he could honour with his choice a girl who seemed so infinitely in every respect beneath his alliance he frankly owned that he had fully intended making more minute inquiries into my family and connections particularly concerning those people he saw me with at Marybone before he acknowledged his prepossession in my favour but seeing me again put him quite off his guard and divesting him of prudence left him nothing but love These were his words and yet he has repeatedly assured me that his partiality has known no bounds from the time of my residing at Clifton
Mr Macartney has just been with me on an embassy from my father He has sent me his kindest love and assurances of favour and desired to know if I am happy in the prospect of changing my situation and if there is any thing I can name which he can do for me And at the same time Mr Macartney delivered to me a draught on my fathers banker for a thousand pounds which he insisted that I should receive entirely for my own use and expend in equipping myself properly for the new rank of life to which I seem destined
I am sure I need not say how much I was penetrated by this goodness I wrote my thanks and acknowledged frankly that if I could see him restored to tranquillity my heart would be without a wish
LETTER LXXXII
EVELINA IN CONTINUATION Clifton Oct 13th
THE time approaches now when I hope we shall meetyet I cannot sleepgreat joy is a restless as sorrowand therefore I will continue my journal
As I had never had an opportunity of seeing Bath a party was formed last night for showing me that celebrated city and this morning after breakfast we set out in three phaetons Lady Louisa and Mrs Beaumont with Lord Merton Mr Coverley Mr Lovel and Mrs Selwyn and myself with Lord Orville
We had hardly proceeded half a mile when a gentleman from the postchaise which came gallopping after us called out to the servants Holla my ladspray is one Miss Anville in any of them thingembobs
I immediately recollected the voice of Captain Mirvan and Lord Orville stopped the phaeton He was out of the chaise and with us in a moment So Miss Anville cried he how do you do So I hear youre Miss Belmont nowpray how does old Madame French do
Madame Duval said I is I believe very well
I hope she is in good case said he winking significantly and wont flinch at seeing service she has laid by long enough to refit and be made tight And pray how does poor Monseer Doleful do Is he as lankjawed as ever
They are neither of them said I in Bristol
No cried he with a look of disappointment but surely the old dowager intends coming to the wedding twill be a most excellent opportunity to show off her best Lyons silk Besides I purpose to dance a new fashioned jig with her Dont you know when shell come
I have no reason to expect her at all
NoFore George this heres the worst news Id wish to hearwhy Ive thought of nothing all the way but what trick I should serve her
You have been very obliging said I laughing
O I promise you cried he our Moll would never have wheedled me into this jaunt if Id known she was not here for to let you into the secret I fully intended to have treated the old buck with another frolic
Did Miss Mirvan then persuade you to this journey
Yes and weve been travelling all night
We cried I Is Miss Mirvan then with you
What Mollyyes shes in that there chaise
Good God Sir why did you not tell me sooner cried I and immediately with Lord Orvilles assistance I jumped out of the phaeton and ran to the dear girl Lord Orville opened the chaise door and I am sure I need not tell you what unfeigned joy accompanied our meeting
We both begged we might not be parted during the ride and Lord
Orville was so good as to invite Captain Mirvan into his phaeton
I think I was hardly ever more rejoiced than at this so seasonable visit from my dear Maria who had no sooner heard the situation of my affairs than with the assistance of Lady Howard and her kind mother she besought her father with such earnestness to consent to the journey that he had not been able to withstand their united intreaties though she owned that had he not expected to have met with Madame Duval she believes he would not so readily have yielded They arrived at Mrs Beaumonts but a few minutes after we were out of sight and overtook us without much difficulty
I say nothing of our conversation because you may so well suppose both the subjects we chose and our manner of discussing them
We all stopped at a great hotel where we were obliged to enquire for a room as Lady Louisa fatigued to death desired to take something before we began our rambles
As soon as the party was assembled the Captain abruptly saluting me said So Miss Belmont I wish you joy so I hear youve quarrelled with your new name already
Meno indeed Sir
Then please for to tell me the reason youre in such a hurry to change it
Miss Belmont cried Mr Lovel Looking around him with the utmost astonishment I beg pardonbut if it is not impertinentI must beg leave to say I always understood that ladys name was Anville
Fore George cried the Captain it runs in my head Ive seen you somewhere before And now I think ont pray ant you the person I saw at the play one night and who didnt know all the time whether it was a tragedy or a comedy or a concert of fiddlers
I believe Sir said Mr Lovel stammering I had onceI thinkthe pleasure of seeing you last spring
Aye and if I live an hundred springs answered he I shall never forget it by Jingo it has served me for a most excellent good joke ever since Well howsomever Im glad to see you still in the land of the living shaking him roughly by the hand Pray if a body may be so bold how much a night may you give at present to keep the undertakers aloof
Me Sir said Mr Lovel very much discomposed I protest I never thought myself in such imminent danger as toreally Sir I dont understand you
O you dont why then Ill make free for to explain myself Gentlemen and Ladies Ill tell you what do you know this here gentleman simple as he sits there pays five shillings anight to let his friends know hes alive
And very cheap too said Mrs Selwyn if we consider the value of the intelligence
Lady Louisa being now refreshed we proceeded upon our expedition
The charming city of Bath answered all my expectations The Crescent the prospect from it and the elegant symmetry of the Circus delighted me The Parades I own rather disappointed me one of them is scarce preferable to some of the best paved streets in London and the other though it affords a beautiful prospect a charming view of Prior Park and of the Avon yet wanted something in itself of more striking elegance than a mere broad pavement to satisfy the ideas I had formed of it
At the pumproom I was amazed at the public exhibition of the ladies in the bath it is true their heads are covered with bonnets but the very idea of being seen in such a situation by whoever pleases to look is indelicate
Fore George said the Captain looking into the bath this would be a most excellent place for old Madame French to dance a fandango in By Jingo I woudnt wish for better sport than to swing her round this here pond
She would be very much obliged to you said Lord Orville for so extraordinary a mark of your favour
Why to let you know answered the Captain she hit my fancy mightily I never took so much to an old tabby before
Really now cried Mr Lovel looking also into the bath I must confess it is to me very incomprehensible why the ladies choose that frightful unbecoming dress to bathe in I have often pondered very seriously upon the subject but could never hit upon the reason
Well I declare said Lady Louisa I should like of all things to set something new agoing I always hated bathing because one can get no pretty dress for it now do theres a good creature try to help me to something
Who meO dear Maam said he simpering I cant pretend to assist a person of your Ladyships tastes besides I have not the least head for fashionsI really dont think I ever invented above three in my life But I never had the least turn for dressnever any notion of fancy or elegance
O fie Mr Lovel how can you talk sodont we all know that you lead the ton in the beau monde I declare I think you dress better than any body
O dear Maam you confuse me to the last degree I dress wellI protest I dont think Im ever fit to be seen Im often shocked to death to think what a figure I go If your Ladyship will believe me I was full half an hour this morning thinking what I should put on
Odds my life cried the Captain I wish Id been near you I warrant Id have quickened your motions a little Half an hour thinking what youd put on and who the deuce do you think cares the snuff of a candle whether youve any thing on or not
O pray Captain cried Mrs Selwyn dont be angry with the gentleman for thinking whatever be the cause for I assure you he makes no common practice of offending in that way
Really Maam youre prodigiously kind said Mr Lovel angrily
Pray now said the Captain did you ever get a ducking in that there place yourself
A ducking Sir repeated Mr Lovel I protest I think thats rather an odd termbut if you mean a bathing it is an honour I have had many times
And pray if a body may be so bold what do you do with that frizlefrize top of your own Why Ill lay you what you will there is fat and grease enough on your crown to buoy you up if you were to go in head downwards
And I dont know cried Mrs Selwyn but that might be the easiest way for Im sure it would be the lightest
For the matter of that there said the Captain you must make him a soldier before you can tell which is lightest head or heels Howsomever Id lay ten pounds to a shilling I could whisk him so dexterously over into the pool that he should light plump upon his foretop and turn round like a tetotum
Done cried Lord Merton I take your odds
Will you returned he why then fore George Id do it as soon as say Jack Robinson
He he faintly laughed Mr Lovel as he moved abruptly from the window pon honour this is pleasant enough but I dont see what right any body has to lay wagers about one without ones consent
There Lovel you are out cried Mr Coverley any man may lay what wager about you he will your consent is nothing to the purpose he may lay that your nose is a skyblue if he pleases
Ay said Mrs Selwyn or that your mind is more adorned than your personor any absurdity whatsoever
I protest said Mr Lovel I think its a very disagreeable privilege and I must beg that nobody may take such a liberty with me
Like enough you may cried the Captain but whats that to the purpose Suppose Ive a mind to lay that youve never a tooth in your headpray how will you hinder me
Youll allow me at least Sir to take the liberty of asking how youll prove it
Howwhy by knocking them all down your throat
Knocking them all down my throat Sir repeated Mr Lovel with a look of horror I protest I never heard any thing so shocking in my life And I must beg leave to observe that no wager in my opinion could justify such a barbarous action
Here Lord Orville interfered and hurried us to our carriages
We returned in the same order we came Mrs Beaumont invited all the party to dinner and has been so obliging as to beg Miss Mirvan may continue at her house during her stay The Captain will lodge at the Wells
The first halfhour after our return was devoted to hearing Mr Lovels apologies for dining in his ridingdress
Mrs Beaumont then addressing herself to Miss Mirvan and me inquired how we liked Bath
I hope said Mr Lovel the ladies do not call this seeing Bath
Nowhat should ail em cried the Captain do you suppose they put their eyes in their pockets
No Sir but I fancy you will find no personthat isno person of any conditioncall going about a few places in a morning seeing Bath
Mayhap then said the literal Captain you think we should see it better by going about at midnight
No Sir no said Mr Lovel with a supercilious smile I perceive you dont understand mewe should never call it seeing Bath without going at the right season
Why what a plague then demanded he can you only see at one season of the year
Mr Lovel again smiled but seemed superior to making any answer
The Bath amusements said Lord Orville have a sameness in them which after a short time renders them rather insipid but the greatest objection that can be made to the place is the encouragement it gives to gamesters
Why I hope my Lord you would not think of abolishing gaming cried Lord Merton tis the very zest of life Devil take me if I could live without it
I am sorry for it said Lord Orville gravely and looking at
Lady Louisa
Your Lordship is no judge of this subject continued the other but if once we could get you to a gamingtable youd never be happy away from it
I hope my Lord cried Lady Louisa that nobody here ever occasions your quitting it
Your Ladyship said Lord Merton recollecting himself has power to make me quit any thing
Except herself said Mr Coverley Egad my Lord I think Ive helpt you out there
You men of wit Jack answered his Lordship are always readyfor my part I dont pretend to any talents that way
Really my Lord asked the sarcastic Mrs Selwyn well that is wonderful considering success would be so much in your power
Pray Maam said Mr Lovel to Lady Louisa has your Ladyship heard the news
Newswhat news
Why the report circulating at the Wells concerning a certain person
O Lord no pray tell me what it is
O no Maam I beg your Laship will excuse me tis a profound secret and I would not have mentioned it if I had not thought you knew it
Lord now how can you be so monstrous I declare now youre a provoking creature But come I know youll tell mewont you now
Your Laship knows I am but too happy to obey you but pon honour I cant speak a word if you wont all promise me the most inviolable secrecy
I wish youd wait for that from me said the Captain and Ill give you my word youd be dumb for one while Secrecy quothaFore George I wonder you ant ashamed to mention such a word when you talk of telling it to a woman Though for the matter of that Id as lieve blab it to the whole sex at once as to go for to tell it to such a thing as you
Such a thing as me Sir said Mr Lovel letting fall his knife and fork and looking very important I really have not the honour to understand your expression
Its all one for that said the Captain you may have it explained whenever you like it
Pon honour Sir returned Mr Lovel I must take the liberty to tell you that I should be extremely offended but that I suppose it to be some seaphrase and therefore Ill let it pass without further notice
Lord Orville then to change the discourse asked Miss Mirvan if she should spend the ensuing winter in London
No to be sure said the Captain what should she for She saw all that was to be seen before
Is London then said Mr Lovel smiling at Lady Louisa only to be regarded as a sight
Why pray Mr Wiseacre how are you pleased for to regard it yourselfAnswer me to that
O Sir my opinion I fancy you would hardly find intelligible I dont understand seaphrases enough to define it to your comprehension Does not your Laship think the task would be rather difficult
O Lard yes cried Lady Louisa I declare Id as soon teach my parrot to talk Welsh
Ha ha ha AdmirablePon honour your Laships quite in luck today but that indeed your Laship is every day Though to be sure it is but candid to acknowledge that the gentlemen of the ocean have a set of ideas as well as a dialect so opposite to ours that it is by no means surprising they should regard London as a mere show that may be seen by being looked at Ha ha ha
Ha ha echoed Lady Louisa Well I declare you are the drollest creature
He he Pon honour I cant help laughing at the conceit of seeing
London in a few weeks
And what a plague should hinder you cried the Captain do you want to spend a day in every street
Here again Lady Louisa and Mr Lovel interchanged smiles
Why I warrant you if I had the showing it Id haul you from
St Jamess to Wapping the very first morning
The smiles were now with added contempt repeated which the Captain observing looked very fiercely at Mr Lovel and said Harkee my spark none of your grinningtis a lingo I dont understand and if you give me any more of it I shall go near to lend you a box o the ear
I protest Sir said Mr Lovel turning extremely pale I think its taking a very particular liberty with a person to talk to one in such a style as this
Its like you may returned the Captain but give a good gulp and Ill warrant youll swallow it Then calling for a glass of ale with a very provoking and significant nod he drank to his easy digestion
Mr Lovel made no answer but looked extremely sullen and soon after we left the gentlemen to themselves
I had then two letters delivered to me one from Lady Howard and Mrs Mirvan which contained the kindest congratulations and the other from Madame Duvalbut not a word from youto my no small surprise and concern
Madame Duval seems greatly rejoiced at my late intelligence a violent cold she says prevents her coming to Bristol The Branghtons she tells me are all well Miss Polly is soon to be married to Mr Brown but Mr Smith has changed his lodgings which she adds has made the house extremely dull However thats not the worst news pardi I wish it was but Ive been used like nobodyfor Monsieur Du Bois has had the baseness to go back to France without me In conclusion she assures me as you prognosticated she would that I shall be sole heiress of all she is worth when Lady Orville
At teatime we were joined by all the gentlemen but Captain Mirvan who went to the hotel where he was to sleep and made his daughter accompany him to separate her trumpery as he called it from his clothes
As soon as they were gone Mr Lovel who still appeared extremely sulky said I protest I never saw such a vulgar abusive fellow in my life as that Captain pon honour I believe he came here for no purpose in the world but to pick a quarrel however for my part I vow I wont humour him
I declare cried Lady Louisa he put me in a monstrous frightI never heard any body talk so shocking in my life
I think said Mrs Selwyn with great solemnity he threatened to box your ears Mr Loveldid not he
Really Maam said Mr Lovel colouring if one was to mind every thing those low kind of people say one should never be at rest for one impertinence or other so I think the best way is to be above taking any notice of them
What said Mrs Selwyn with the same gravity and so receive the blow in silence
During this discourse I heard the Captains chaise stop at the door and ran downstairs to meet Maria She was alone and told me that her father who she was sure had some scheme in agitation against Mr Lovel had sent her on before him We continued in the parlour till his return and were joined by Lord Orville who begged me not to insist on a patience so unnatural as submitting to be excluded our society And let me my dear Sir with a grateful heart let me own I never before passed half an hour in such perfect felicity
I believe we were all sorry when the Captain returned yet his inward satisfaction from however different a cause did not seem inferior to what ours had been He chucked Maria under the chin rubbed his hands and was scarce able to contain the fullness of his glee We all attended him to the drawing room where having composed his countenance without any previous attention to Mrs Beaumont he marched up to Mr Lovel and abruptly said Pray have you eer a brother in these here parts
Me Sirno thank Heaven Im free from all encumbrances of that sort
Well cried the Captain I met a person just now so like you
I could have sworn he had been your twin brother
It would have been a most singular pleasure to me said Mr Lovel if I also could have seen him for really I have not the least notion what sort of a person I am and I have a prodigious curiosity to know
Just then the Captains servant opening the door said A little gentleman below desires to see one Mr Lovel
Beg him to walk up stairs said Mrs Beaumont But pray what is the reason William is out of the way
The man shut the door without any answer
I cant imagine who it is said Mr Lovel I recollect no little gentleman of my acquaintance now at Bristolexcept indeed the Marquis of Charltonbut I dont much fancy it can be him Let me see who else is there so very little
A confused noise among the servants now drew all eyes towards the door the impatient Captain hastened to open it and then clapping his hands called out Fore George tis the same person I took for your relation
And then to the utter astonishment of every body but himself he hauled into the room a monkey fulldressed and extravagantly e la mode
The dismay of the company was almost general Poor Mr Lovel seemed thunderstruck with indignation and surprise Lady Louisa began a scream which for some time was incessant Miss Mirvan and I jumped involuntarily upon the seats of our chairs Mrs Beaumont herself followed our example Lord Orville placed himself before me as a guard and Mrs Selwyn Lord Merton and Mr Coverley burst into a loud immoderate ungovernable fit of laughter in which they were joined by the Captain till unable to support himself he rolled on the floor
The first voice which made its way through this general noise was that of Lady Louisa which her fright and screaming rendered extremely shrill Take it away cried she take the monster awayI shall faint I shall faint if you dont
Mr Lovel irritated beyond endurance angrily demanded of the Captain what he meant
Mean cried the Captain as soon as he was able to speak why only to shew you in your proper colours Then rising and pointing to the monkey Why now ladies and gentlemen Ill be judged by you allDid you ever see any thing more likeOdds my life if it wasnt for this here tail you wouldnt know one from tother
Sir cried Mr Lovel stamping I shall take a time to make you feel my wrath
Come now continued the regardless Captain just for the funs sake doff your coat and waistcoat and swop with Monseer Grinagain here and Ill warrant youll not know yourself which is which
Not know myself from a monkeyI assure you Sir Im not to be used in this manner and I wont bear itcurse me if I will
Why heyday cried the Captain what is master in a passionwell dont be angrycome he shant hurt youhere shake a paw with himwhy hell do you no harm mancome kiss and be friends
Who I cried Mr Lovel almost mad with vexation as Im a living creature I would not touch him for a thousand worlds
Send him a challenge cried Mr Coverley and Ill be your second
Ay do said the Captain and Ill be second to my friend Monseer
Clapperclaw here Come to it at oncetooth and nail
God forbid cried Mr Lovel retreating I would sooner trust my person with a mad bull
I dont like the look of him myself said Lord Merton for he grins most horribly
Oh Im frightened out of my senses cried Lady Louisa take him away or I shall die
Captain said Lord Orville the ladies are alarmed and I must beg you would send the monkey away
Why where can be the mighty harm of one monkey more than another answered the Captain howsomever if its agreeable to the ladies suppose we turn them out together
What do you mean by that Sir cried Mr Lovel lifting up his cane
What do you mean cried the Captain fiercely be so good as to down with your cane
Poor Mr Lovel too much intimidated to stand his ground yet too much enraged to submit turned hastily round and forgetful of consequences vented his passion by giving a furious blow to the monkey
The creature darting forwards sprung instantly upon him and clinging round his neck fastened his teeth to one of his ears
I was really sorry for the poor man who though an egregious fop had committed no offence that merited such chastisement
It was impossible now to distinguish whose screams were loudest those of Mr Lovel or of the terrified Lady Louisa who I believe thought her own turn was approaching but the unrelenting Captain roared with joy
Not so Lord Orville ever humane generous and benevolent he quitted his charge who he saw was wholly out of danger and seizing the monkey by the collar made him loosen the ear and then with a sudden swing flung him out of the room and shut the door
Poor Mr Lovel almost fainting with terror sunk upon the floor crying out Oh I shall die I shall dieOh Im bit to death
Captain Mirvan said Mrs Beaumont with no little indignation I must own I dont perceive the wit of this action and I am sorry to have such cruelty practised in my house
Why Lord Maam said the Captain when his rapture abated sufficiently for speech how could I tell theyd fall out soBy jingo I brought him to be a messmate for tother
Egad said Mr Coverley I would not have been served so for a thousand pounds
Why then theres the odds of it said the Captain for you see he is served so for nothing But come turning to Mr Lovel be of good heart all may end well yet and you and Monseer Longtail be as good friends as ever
Im surprised Mrs Beaumont cried Mr Lovel starting up that you can suffer a person under your roof to be treated so inhumanly
What argufies so many words said the unfeeling Captain it is but a slit of the ear it only looks as if you had been in the pillory
Very true added Mrs Selwyn and who knows but it may acquire you the credit of being an antiministerial writer
I protest cried Mr Lovel looking ruefully at his dress my new riding suits all over blood
Ha ha ha cried the Captain see what comes of studying for an hour what you shall put on
Mr Lovel then walked to the glass and looking at the place exclaimed Oh heaven what a monstrous wound my ear will never be fit to be seen again
Why then said the Captain you must hide ittis but wearing a wig
A wig repeated the affrighted Mr Lovel I wear a wigno not if you would give me a thousand pounds an hour
I declare said Lady Louisa I never heard such a shocking proposal in my life
Lord Orville then seeing no prospect that the altercation would cease proposed to the Captain to walk He assented and having given Mr Lovel a nod of exultation accompanied his Lordship down stairs
Pon honour said Mr Lovel the moment the door was shut that fellow is the greatest brute in nature he ought not to be admitted into a civilized society
Lovel said Mr Coverley affecting to whisper you must certainly pink him you must not put up with such an affront
Sir said Mr Lovel with any common person I should not deliberate an instant but really with a fellow who has done nothing but fight all his life pon honour Sir I cant think of it
Lovel said Lord Merton in the same voice you must call him to account
Every man said he pettishly is the best judge of his own affairs and I dont ask the honour of any persons advice
Egad Lovel said Mr Coverley youre in for ityou cant possibly be off
Sir cried he very impatiently upon any proper occasion I should be as ready to show my courage as any body but as to fighting for such a trifle as thisI protest I should blush to think of it
A trifle cried Mrs Selwyn good Heaven and have you made this astonishing riot about a trifle
Maam answered the poor wretch in great confusion I did not know at first but that my cheek might have been bit but as tis no worse why it does not a great deal signify Mrs Beaumont I have the honour to wish you a good evening Im sure my carriage must be waiting And then very abruptly he left the room
What a commotion has this mischiefloving Captain raised Were I to remain here long even the society of my dear Maria could scarce compensate for the disturbances which he excites
When he returned and heard of the quiet exit of Mr Lovel his triumph was intolerable I think I think he cried I have peppered him well Ill warrant he wont give an hour tomorrow morning to settling what he shall put on why his coat turning to me would be a most excellent match for old Madame Furbelows best Lyons silk Fore George Id desire no better sport than to have that there old cat here to go her snacks
All the company the Lord Orville Miss Mirvan and myself excepted played at cards and we oh how much better did we pass our time
While we were engaged in a most delightful conversation a servant brought me a letter which he told me had by some accident been mislaid Judge of my feelings when I saw my dearest Sir your revered handwriting My emotions soon betrayed to Lord Orville whom the letter was from the importance of the contents he well knew and assuring me I should not be seen by the cardplayers he besought me to open it without delay
Open it indeed I didbut read it I could notthe willing yet awful consent you have grantedthe tenderness of your expressionsthe certainty that no obstacle remained to my eternal union with the loved owner of my heart gave me sensations too various and though joyful too little placid for observation Finding myself unable to proceed and blinded by the tears of gratitude and delight which started into my eyes I gave over the attempt of reading till I retired to my own room and having no voice to answer the enquiries of Lord Orville I put the letter into his hands and left it to speak both for me and itself
Lord Orville was himself affected by your kindness he kissed the letter as he returned it and pressing my hand affectionately to his heart Your are now said he in a low voice all my own Oh my Evelina how will my soul find room for its happinessit seems already bursting I could make no reply indeed I hardly spoke another word the rest of the evening so little talkative is the fulness of contentment
O my dearest Sir the thankfulness of my heart I must pour forth at our meeting when at your feet my happiness receives its confirmation from your blessing and when my nobleminded my beloved Lord Orville presents to you the highlyhonoured and thricehappy Evelina
A few lines I will endeavour to write on Thursday which shall be sent off express to give you should nothing intervene yet more certain assurance of our meeting
Now then therefore for the firstand probably the last time I shall ever own the name permit me to sign myself Most dear Sir your gratefully affectionate EVELINA BELMONT
Lady Louisa at her own particular desire will be present at the ceremony as well as Miss Mirvan and Mrs Selwyn Mr Macartney will the same morning be united to my fostersister and my father himself will give us both away
LETTER LXXXIII
MR VILLARS TO EVELINA
EVERY wish of my soul is now fulfilledfor the felicity of my Evelina is equal to her worthiness
Yes my child thy happiness is engraved in golden characters upon the tablets of my heart and their impression is indelible for should the rude and deepsearching hand of Misfortune attempt to pluck them from their repository the fleeting fabric of life would give way and in tearing from my vitals the nourishment by which they are supported she would but grasp at a shadow insensible to her touch
Give thee my consentOh thou joy comfort and pride of my life how cold is that word to express the fervency of my approbation Yes I do indeed give thee my consent and so thankfully that with the humblest gratitude to Providence I would seal it with the remnant of my days
Hasten then my love to bless me with thy presence and to receive the blessings with which my fond heart overflowsAnd oh my Evelina hear and assist in one only humble but ardent prayer which yet animates my devotions That the height of bliss to which thou art rising may not render thee giddy but that the purity of thy mind may form the brightest splendour of thy prosperityand that the weak and aged frame of thy almost idolizing parent nearly worn out by time past afflictions and infirmities may yet be able to sustain a meeting with all its better part holds dear and then that all the wounds which the former severity of fortune inflicted may be healed and purified by the ultimate consolation of pouring forth my dying words in blessings on my childclosing these joystreaming eyes in her presence and breathing my last faint sighs in her loved arms
Grieve not oh child of my care Grieve not at the inevitable moment but may thy own end be equally propitious Oh mayst thou when full of days and full of honour sink down as gently to restbe loved as kindly watched as tenderly as thy happy father And mayest thou when thy glass is run be sweetly but not bitterly mourned by some remaining darling of thy affectionssome yet surviving Evelina ARTHUR VILLARS
LETTER LXXXIV
EVELINA TO THE REV MR VILLARS
ALL is over my dearest Sir and the fate of your Evelina is decided This morning with fearful joy and trembling gratitude she united herself for ever with the object of her dearest her eternal affection
I have time for no more the chaise now waits which is to conduct me to dear Berry Hill and to the arms of the best of men EVELINA THE END