THE HEIR OF REDCLYFFE
By Charlotte M Yonge
CHAPTER 1
In such pursuits if wisdom lies
Who Laura can thy taste despise
—GAY
The drawingroom of Hollywell House was one of the favoured apartments where a peculiar air of home seems to reside whether seen in the middle of summer all its large windows open to the garden or as when our story commences its bright fire and stands of fragrant greenhouse plants contrasted with the wintry fog and leafless trees of November There were two persons in the room—a young lady who sat drawing at the round table and a youth lying on a couch near the fire surrounded with books and newspapers and a pair of crutches near him Both looked up with a smile of welcome at the entrance of a tall finelooking young man whom each greeted with Good morning Philip
Good morning Laura Good morning Charles I am glad you are downstairs again How are you today
No way remarkable thank you was the answer somewhat wearily given by Charles
You walked said Laura
Yes Wheres my uncle I called at the postoffice and brought a letter for him It has the Moorworth postmark he added producing it
Wheres that said Charles
The posttown to Redclyffe Sir Guy Morvilles place
That old Sir Guy What can he have to do with my father
Did you not know said Philip that my uncle is to be guardian to the boy—his grandson
Eh No I did not
Yes said Philip when old Sir Guy made it an especial point that my father should take the guardianship he only consented on condition that my uncle should be joined with him so now my uncle is alone in the trust and I cannot help thinking something must have happened at Redclyffe It is certainly not Sir Guys writing
It must wait unless your curiosity will carry you out in search of papa said Charles he is somewhere about zealously supplying the place of Jenkins
Really Philip said Laura there is no telling how much good you have done him by convincing him of Jenkins dishonesty To say nothing of the benefit of being no longer cheated the pleasure of having to overlook the farming is untold
Philip smiled and came to the table where she was drawing Do you know this place said she looking up in his face
Stylehurst itself What is it taken from
From this pencil sketch of your sisters which I found in mammas scrap book
You are making it very like only the spire is too slender and that tree—cant you alter the foliage—it is an ash
Is it I took it for an elm
And surely those trees in the foreground should be greener to throw back the middle distance That is the peak of South Moor exactly if it looked further off
She began the alterations while Philip stood watching her progress a shade of melancholy gathering on his face Suddenly a voice called Laura Are you there Open the door and you will see
On Philips opening it in came a tall camellia the laughing face and light shining curls of the bearer peeping through the dark green leaves
Thank you Oh is it you Philip Oh dont take it I must bring my own camellia to show Charlie
You make the most of that one flower said Charles
Only see how many buds and she placed it by his sofa Is it not a perfect blossom so pure a white and so regular And I am so proud of having beaten mamma and all the gardeners for not another will be out this fortnight and this is to go to the horticultural show Sam would hardly trust me to bring it in though it was my nursing not his
Now Amy said Philip when the flower had been duly admired you must let me put it into the window for you It is too heavy for you
Oh take care cried Amabel but too late for as he took it from her the solitary flower struck against Charless little table and was broken off
O Amy I am very sorry What a pity How did it happen
Never mind she answered it will last a long time in water
It was very unlucky—I am very sorry—especially because of the horticultural show
Make all your apologies to Sam said Amy his feelings will be more hurt than mine I dare say my poor flower would have caught cold at the show and never held up its head again
Her tone was gay but Charles who saw her face in the glass betrayed her by saying Winking away a tear O Amy
I never nursed a dear gazelle quoted Amy with a merry laugh and before any more could be said there entered a middleaged gentleman short and slight with a fresh weatherbeaten goodnatured face gray whiskers quick eyes and a hasty undecided air in look and movement He greeted Philip heartily and the letter was given to him
Ha Eh Let us look Not old Sir Guys hand Eh What can be the matter What Dead This is a sudden thing
Dead Who Sir Guy Morville
Yes quite suddenly—poor old man Then stepping to the door he opened it and called Mamma just step here a minute will you mamma
The summons was obeyed by a tall handsome lady and behind her crept with doubtful steps as if she knew not how far to venture a little girl of eleven her turnedup nose and shrewd face full of curiosity She darted up to Amabel who though she shook her head and held up her finger smiled and took the little girls hand listening meanwhile to the announcement Do you hear this mamma Heres a shocking thing Sir Guy Morville dead quite suddenly
Indeed Well poor man I suppose no one ever repented or suffered more than he Who writes
His grandson—poor boy I can hardly make out his letter Holding it half a yard from his eyes so that all could see a few lines of hasty irregular writing in a forcible hand bearing marks of having been penned under great distress and agitation he read aloud—
DEAR MR EDMONSTONE—
My dear grandfather died at six this morning He had an attack of apoplexy yesterday evening and never spoke again though for a short time he knew me We hope he suffered little Markham will make all arrangements We propose that the funeral should take place on Tuesday I hope you will be able to come I would write to my cousin Philip Morville if I knew his address but I depend on you for saying all that ought to be said Excuse this illegible letter—I hardly know what I write
Yours very sincerely
Guy Morville
Poor fellow said Philip he writes with a great deal of proper feeling
How very sad for him to be left alone there said Mrs Edmonstone
Very sad—very said her husband I must start off to him at once—yes at once Should you not say so—eh Philip
Certainly I think I had better go with you It would be the correct thing and I should not like to fail in any token of respect for poor old Sir Guy
Of course—of course said Mr Edmonstone it would be the correct thing I am sure he was always very civil to us and you are next heir after this boy
Little Charlotte made a sort of jump lifted her eyebrows and stared at Amabel
Philip answered That is not worth a thought but since he and I are now the only representatives of the two branches of the house of Morville it shall not be my fault if the enmity is not forgotten
Buried in oblivion would sound more magnanimous said Charles at which Amabel laughed so uncontrollably that she was forced to hide her head on her little sisters shoulder Charlotte laughed too an imprudent proceeding as it attracted attention Her father smiled saying halfreprovingly—So you are there inquisitive pussycat And at her mothers question—Charlotte what business have you here She stole back to her lessons looking very small without the satisfaction of hearing her mothers compassionate words—Poor child
How old is he asked Mr Edmonstone returning to the former subject
He is of the same age as Laura—seventeen and a half answered Mrs Edmonstone Dont you remember my brother saying what a satisfaction it was to see such a noble baby as she was after such a poor little miserable thing as the one at Redclyffe
He is grown into a fine spirited fellow said Philip
I suppose we must have him here said Mr Edmonstone Should you not say so—eh Philip
Certainly I should think it very good for him Indeed his grandfathers death has happened at a most favourable time for him The poor old man had such a dread of his going wrong that he kept him—
I know—as tight as a drum
With strictness that I should think very bad for a boy of his impatient temper It would have been a very dangerous experiment to send him at once among the temptations of Oxford after such discipline and solitude as he has been used to
Dont talk of it interrupted Mr Edmonstone spreading out his hands in a deprecating manner We must do the best we can with him for I have got him on my hands till he is fiveandtwenty—his grandfather has tied him up till then If we can keep him out of mischief well and good if not it cant be helped
You have him all to yourself said Charles
Ay to my sorrow If your poor father was alive Philip I should be free of all care Ive a pretty deal on my hands he proceeded looking more important than troubled All that great Redclyffe estate is no sinecure to say nothing of the youth himself If all the world will come to me I cant help it I must go and speak to the men if I am to be off to Redclyffe tomorrow Will you come Philip
I must go back soon thank you replied Philip I must see about my leave only we should first settle when to set off
This arranged Mr Edmonstone hurried away and Charles began by saying Isnt there a ghost at Redclyffe
So it is said answered his cousin though I dont think it is certain whose it is There is a room called Sir Hughs Chamber over the gateway but the honour of naming it is undecided between Hugo de Morville who murdered Thomas a Becket and his namesake the first Baronet who lived in the time of William of Orange when the quarrel began with our branch of the family Do you know the history of it aunt
It was about some property said Mrs Edmonstone though I dont know the rights of it But the Morvilles were always a fiery violent race and the enmity once begun between Sir Hugh and his brother was kept up generation after generation in a most unjustifiable way Even I can remember when the Morvilles of Redclyffe used to be spoken of in our family like a sort of ogres
Not undeservedly I should think said Philip This poor old man who is just dead ran a strange career Stories of his duels and mad freaks are still extant
Poor man I believe he went all lengths said Mrs Edmonstone
What was the true version of that horrible story about his son said Philip Did he strike him
Oh no it was bad enough without that
How asked Laura
He was an only child and lost his mother early He was very ill brought up and was as impetuous and violent as Sir Guy himself though with much kindliness and generosity He was only nineteen when he made a runaway marriage with a girl of sixteen the sister of a violin player who was at that time in fashion His father was very much offended and there was much dreadfully violent conduct on each side At last the young man was driven to seek a reconciliation He brought his wife to Moorworth and rode to Redclyffe to have an interview with his father Unhappily Sir Guy was giving a dinner to the hunt and had been drinking He not only refused to see him but I am afraid he used shocking language and said something about bidding him go back to his fiddling brother inlaw The son was waiting in the hall heard everything threw himself on his horse and rushed away in the dark His forehead struck against the branch of a tree and he was killed on the spot
The poor wife asked Amabel shuddering
She died the next day when this boy was born
Frightful said Philip It might well make a reformation in old Sir Guy
I have heard that nothing could be more awful than the stillness that fell on that wretched party even before they knew what had happened—before Colonel Harewood who had been called aside by the servants could resolve to come and fetch away the father No wonder Sir Guy was a changed man from that hour
It was then that he sent for my father said Philip
But what made him think of doing so
You know Colonel Harewoods house at Stylehurst Many years ago when the St Mildreds races used to be so much more in fashion Sir Guy and Colonel Harewood and some men of that stamp took that house amongst them and used to spend some time there every year to attend to something about the training of the horses There were some malpractices of their servants that did so much harm in the parish that my brother was obliged to remonstrate Sir Guy was very angry at first but behaved better at last than any of the others I suspect he was struck by my dear brothers bold uncompromising ways for he took to him to a certain degree—and my brother could not help being interested in him there seemed to be so much goodness in his nature I saw him once and never did I meet any one who gave me so much the idea of a finished gentleman When the poor son was about fourteen he was with a tutor in the neighbourhood and used to be a good deal at Stylehurst and after the unhappy marriage my brother happened to meet him in London heard his story and tried to bring about a reconciliation
Ha said Philip did not they come to Stylehurst I have a dim recollection of somebody very tall and a lady who sung
Yes your father asked them to stay there that he might judge of her and wrote to Sir Guy that she was a little gentle childish thing capable of being moulded to anything and representing the mischief of leaving them to such society as that of her brother who was actually maintaining them That letter was never answered but about ten days or a fortnight after this terrible accident Colonel Harewood wrote to entreat my brother to come to Redclyffe saying poor Sir Guy had eagerly caught at the mention of his name Of course he went at once and he told me that he never in all his experience as a clergyman saw any one so completely broken down with grief
I found a great many of his letters among my fathers papers said Philip and it was a very touching one that he wrote to me on my fathers death Those Redclyffe people certainly have great force of character
And was it then he settled his property on my uncle said Charles
Yes said Mrs Edmonstone My brother did not like his doing so but he would not be at rest till it was settled It was in vain to put him in mind of his grandchild for he would not believe it could live and indeed its life hung on a thread I remember my brother telling me how he went to Moorworth to see it—for it could not be brought home—in hopes of bringing back a report that might cheer its grandfather but how he found it so weak and delicate that he did not dare to try to make him take interest in it It was not till the child was two or three years old that Sir Guy ventured to let himself grow fond of it
Sir Guy was a very striking person said Philip I shall not easily forget my visit to Redclyffe four years ago It was more like a scene in a romance than anything real—the fine old red sandstone house crumbling away in the exposed parts the arched gateway covered with ivy the great quadrangle where the sun never shone and full of echoes the large hall and black wainscoted rooms which the candles never would light up It is a fit place to be haunted
That poor boy alone there said Mrs Edmonstone I am glad you and your uncle are going to him
Tell us about him said Laura
He was the most incongruous thing there said Philip There was a calm deep melancholy about the old man added to the grand courtesy which showed he had been what old books call a fine gentleman that made him suit his house as a hermit does his cell or a knight his castle but breaking in on this penseroso scene there was Guy—
In what way asked Laura
Always in wild spirits rushing about playing antics provoking the solemn echoes with shouting whooping singing whistling There was something in that whistle of his that always made me angry
How did this suit old Sir Guy
It was curious to see how Guy could rattle on to him pour out the whole history of his doings laughing rubbing his hands springing about with animation—all with as little answer as if he had been talking to a statue
Do you mean that Sir Guy did not like it
He did in his own way There was now and then a glance or a nod to show that he was attending but it was such slight encouragement that any less buoyant spirits must have been checked
Did you like him on the whole asked Laura I hope he has not this tremendous Morville temper Oh you dont say so What a grievous thing
He is a fine fellow said Philip but I did not think Sir Guy managed him well Poor old man he was quite wrapped up in him and only thought how to keep him out of harms way He would never let him be with other boys and kept him so fettered by rules so strictly watched and so sternly called to account that I cannot think how any boy could stand it
Yet you say he told everything freely to his grandfather said Amy
Yes added her mother I was going to say that as long as that went on I should think all safe
As I said before resumed Philip he has a great deal of frankness much of the making of a fine character but he is a thorough Morville I remember something that will show you his best and worst sides You know Redclyffe is a beautiful place with magnificent cliffs overhanging the sea and fine woods crowning them On one of the most inaccessible of these crags there was a hawks nest about halfway down so that looking from the top of the precipice we could see the old birds fly in and out Well what does Master Guy do but go down this headlong descent after the nest How he escaped alive no one could guess and his grandfather could not bear to look at the place afterwards—but climb it he did and came back with two young hawks buttoned up inside his jacket
Theres a regular brick for you cried Charles delighted
His heart was set on training these birds He turned the library upside down in search of books on falconry and spent every spare moment on them At last a servant left some door open and they escaped I shall never forget Guys passion I am sure I dont exaggerate when I say he was perfectly beside himself with anger
Poor boy said Mrs Edmonstone
Served the rascal right said Charles
Nothing had any effect on him till his grandfather came out and at the sight of him he was tamed in an instant hung his head came up to his grandfather and said—I am very sorry Sir Guy answered My poor boy and there was not another word I saw Guy no more that day and all the next he was quiet and subdued But the most remarkable part of the story is to come A couple of days afterwards we were walking in the woods when at the sound of Guys whistle we heard a flapping and rustling and beheld tumbling along with their clipped wings these two identical hawks very glad to be caught They drew themselves up proudly for him to stroke them and their yellow eyes looked at him with positive affection
Pretty creatures said Amabel That is a very nice end to the story
It is not the end said Philip I was surprised to see Guy so sober instead of going into one of his usual raptures He took them home but the first thing I heard in the morning was that he was gone to offer them to a farmer to keep the birds from his fruit
Did he do it of his own accord asked Laura
That was just what I wanted to know but any hint about them brought such a cloud over his face that I thought it would be wanton to irritate him by questions However I must be going Goodbye Amy I hope your Camellia will have another blossom before I come back At least I shall escape the horticultural meeting
Goodbye said Charles Put the feud in your pocket till you can bury it in old Sir Guys grave unless you mean to fight it out with his grandson which would be more romantic and exciting
Philip was gone before he could finish Mrs Edmonstone looked annoyed and Laura said Charlie I wish you would not let your spirits carry you away
I wish I had anything else to carry me away was the reply
Yes said his mother looking sadly at him Your high spirits are a blessing but why misuse them If they are given to support you through pain and confinement why make mischief with them
Charles looked more impatient than abashed and the compunction seemed chiefly to rest with Amabel
Now said Mrs Edmonstone I must go and see after my poor little prisoner
Ah said Laura as she went it was no kindness in you to encourage Charlotte to stay Amy when you know how often that inquisitive temper has got her into scrapes
I suppose so said Amy regretfully but I had not the heart to send her away
That is just what Philip says that you only want bones and sinews in your character to—
Come Laura interrupted Charles I wont hear Philips criticisms of my sister I had rather she had no bones at all than that they stuck out and ran into me There are plenty of angles already in the world without sharpening hers
He possessed himself of Amys round plump childish hand and spread out over it his still whiter and very bony fingers pinching her soft pinky cushions as he called them not meant for studying anatomy upon
Ah you two spoil each other sadly said Laura smiling as she left the room
And what do Philip and Laura do to each other said Charles
Improve each other I suppose said Amabel in a shy simple tone at which Charles laughed heartily
I wish I was as sensible as Laura said she presently with a sigh
Never was a more absurd wish said Charles tormenting her hand still more and pulling her curls unwish it forthwith Where should I be without silly little Amy If every one weighed my wit before laughing I should not often be in disgrace for my high spirits as they call them
I am so little younger than Laura said Amy still sadly though smiling
Folly said Charles you are quite wise enough for your age while Laura is so prematurely wise that I am in constant dread that nature will take her revenge by causing her to do something strikingly foolish
Nonsense cried Amy indignantly Laura do anything foolish
What I should enjoy proceeded Charles would be to see her over head and ears in love with this hero and Philip properly jealous
How can you say such things Charlie
Why was there ever a beauty who did not fall in love with her fathers ward
No but she ought to live alone with her very old father and horribly grim maiden aunt
Very well Amy you shall be the maiden aunt And as Laura returned at that moment he announced to her that they had been agreeing that no hero ever failed to fall in love with his guardians beautiful daughter
If his guardian had a beautiful daughter said Laura resolved not to be disconcerted
Did you ever hear such barefaced fishing for compliments said Charles but Amabel who did not like her sister to be teased and was also conscious of having wasted a good deal of time sat down to practise Laura returned to her drawing and Charles with a yawn listlessly turned over a newspaper while his fair delicate features which would have been handsome but that they were blanched sharpened and worn with pain gradually lost their animated and rather satirical expression and assumed an air of weariness and discontent
Charles was at this time nineteen and for the last ten years had been afflicted with a disease in the hipjoint which in spite of the most anxious care caused him frequent and severe suffering and had occasioned such a contraction of the limb as to cripple him completely while his general health was so much affected as to render him an object of constant anxiety His mother had always been his most devoted and indefatigable nurse giving up everything for his sake and watching him night and day His father attended to his least caprice and his sisters were of course his slaves so that he was the undisputed sovereign of the whole family
The two elder girls had been entirely under a governess till a month or two before the opening of our story when Laura was old enough to be introduced and the governess departing the two sisters became Charless companions in the drawingroom while Mrs Edmonstone who had a peculiar taste and talent for teaching undertook little Charlottes lessons herself
CHAPTER 2
If the ill spirit have so fair a house
Good things will strive to dwell witht
—THE TEMPEST
One of the pleasantest rooms at Hollywell was Mrs Edmonstones dressingroom—large and baywindowed over the drawingroom having little of the dressingroom but the name and a toilettable with a black and gold japanned glass and curiously shaped boxes to match her room opened into it on one side and Charless on the other it was a sort of upstairs parlour where she taught Charlotte cast up accounts spoke to servants and wrote notes and where Charles was usually to be found when unequal to coming downstairs It had an air of great snugness with its large foldingscreen covered with prints and caricatures of ancient date its bookshelves its tables its peculiarly easy armchairs the great invalid sofa and the grate which always lighted up better than any other in the house
In the bright glow of the fire with the shutters closed and curtains drawn lay Charles on his couch one Monday evening in a gorgeous dressinggown of a Chinese pattern all over pagodas while little Charlotte sat opposite to him curled up on a footstool He was not always very civil to Charlotte she sometimes came into collision with him for she too was a pet and had a will of her own and at other times she could bore him but just now they had a common interest and he was gracious
It is striking six so they must soon be here I wish mamma would let me go down but I must wait till after dinner
Then Charlotte as soon as you come in hold up your hands and exclaim What a guy There will be a compliment
No Charlie I promised mamma and Laura that you should get me into no more scrapes
Did you The next promise you make had better depend upon yourself alone
But Amy said I must be quiet because poor Sir Guy will be too sorrowful to like a racket and when Amy tells me to be quiet I know that I must indeed
Most true said Charles laughing
Do you think you shall like Sir Guy
I shall be able to determine,' said Charles sententiously when I have seen whether he brushes his hair to the right or left
Philip brushes his to the left
Then undoubtedly Sir Guy will brush his to the right
Is there not some horrid story about those Morvilles of Redclyffe asked Charlotte I asked Laura and she told me not to be curious so I knew there was something in it and then I asked Amy and she said it would be no pleasure to me to know
Ah I would have you prepared
Why what is it Oh dear Charlie are you really going to tell me
Did you ever hear of a deadly feud
I have read of them in the history of Scotland They went on hating and killing each other for ever There was one man who made his enemys children eat out of a pigtrough and another who cut off his head
His own
No his enemys and put it on the table at breakfast with a piece of bread in its mouth
Very well whenever Sir Guy serves up Philips head at breakfast with a piece of bread in his mouth let me know
Charlotte started up Charles what do you mean Such things dont happen now
Nevertheless there is a deadly feud between the two branches of the house of Morville
But it is very wrong said Charlotte looking frightened
Wrong Of course it is
Philip wont do anything wrong But how will they ever get on
Dont you see It must be our serious endeavour to keep the peace and prevent occasions of discord
Do you think anything will happen
It is much to be apprehended said Charles solemnly
At that moment the sound of wheels was heard and Charlotte flew off to her private post of observation leaving her brother delighted at having mystified her She returned on tiptoe Papa and Sir Guy are come but not Philip I cant see him anywhere
Ah you have not looked in Sir Guys greatcoat pocket
I wish you would not plague me so You are not in earnest
The pettish inquiring tone was exactly what delighted him And he continued to tease her in the same style till Laura and Amabel came running in with their report of the stranger
He is come they cried with one voice
Very gentlemanlike said Laura
Very pleasant looking said Amy Such fine eyes
And so much expression said Laura Oh
The exclamation and the start which accompanied it were caused by hearing her fathers voice close to the door which had been left partly open Here is poor Charles it said come in and see him get over the first introduction—eh Guy And before he had finished both he and the guest were in the room and Charlotte full of mischievous glee at her sisters confusion
Well Charlie boy how goes it was his fathers greeting Better eh Sorry not to find you downstairs but I have brought Guy to see you Then as Charles sat up and shook hands with Sir Guy he continued—A fine chance for you as I was telling him to have a companion always at hand a fine chance eh Charlie
I am not so unreasonable as to expect any one to be always at hand said Charles smiling as he looked up at the frank open face and lustrous hazel eyes turned on him with compassion at the sight of his crippled helpless figure and with a bright cordial promise of kindness
As he spoke a pattering sound approached the door was pushed open and while Sir Guy exclaimed O Bustle Bustle I am very sorry there suddenly appeared a large beautiful spaniel with a long silky black and white coat jetty curled ears tan spots above his intelligent eyes and tan legs fringed with silken waves of hair but crouching and looking beseeching at meeting no welcome while Sir Guy seemed much distressed at his intrusion
O you beauty cried Charles Come here you fine fellow
Bustle only looked wistfully at his master and moved nothing but his feather of a tail
Ah I was afraid you would repent of your kindness said Sir Guy to Mr Edmonstone
Not at all not at all was the answer mamma never objects to indoor pets eh Amy
A tender subject papa said Laura poor Pepper
Amy ashamed of her disposition to cry at the remembrance of the dear departed rough terrier bent down to hide her glowing face and held out her hand to the dog which at last ventured to advance still creeping with his body curved till his tail was foremost looking imploringly at his master as if to entreat his pardon
Are you sure you dont dislike it inquired Sir Guy of Charles
I O no Here you fine creature
Come then behave like a rational dog since you are come said Sir Guy and Bustle resuming the deportment of a spirited and wellbred spaniel no longer crouched and curled himself into the shape of a comma but bounded wagged his tail thrust his nose into his masters hand and then proceeded to reconnoitre the rest of the company paying especial attention to Charles putting his forepaws on the sofa and rearing himself up to contemplate him with a grave polite curiosity that was very diverting
Well old fellow said Charles did you ever see the like of such a dressinggown Are you satisfied Give me your paw and let us swear an eternal friendship
I am quite glad to see a dog in the house again said Laura and after a few more compliments Bustle and his master followed Mr Edmonstone out of the room
One of my fathers welljudged proceedings murmured Charles That poor fellow had rather have gone a dozen miles further than have been lugged in here Really if papa chooses to inflict such dressinggowns on me he should give me notice before he brings men and dogs to make me their laughingstock
An unlucky moment said Laura Will my cheeks ever cool
Perhaps he did not hear said Amabel consolingly
You did not ask about Philip said Charlotte with great earnestness
He is staying at Thorndale and then going to St Mildreds said Laura
I hope you are relieved said her brother and she looked in doubt whether she ought to laugh
And what do you think of Sir Guy
May he only be worthy of his dog replied Charles
Ah said Laura many men are neither worthy of their wives nor of their dogs
Dr Henley I suppose is the foundation of that aphorism said Charles
If Margaret Morville could marry him she could hardly be too worthy said Laura Think of throwing away Philips whole soul
O Laura she could not lose that said Amabel
Laura looked as if she knew more but at that moment both her father and mother entered the former rubbing his hands as he always did when much pleased and sending his voice before him as he exclaimed Well Charlie well young ladies is not he a fine fellow—eh
Rather undersized said Charles
Eh Hell grow He is not eighteen you know plenty of time a very good height you cant expect every one to be as tall as Philip but hes a capital fellow And how have you been—any pain
Hem—rather said Charles shortly for he hated answering kind inquiries when out of humour
Ah thats a pity I was sorry not to find you in the drawingroom but I thought you would have liked just to see him said Mr Edmonstone disappointed and apologizing
I had rather have had some notice of your intention said Charles I would have made myself fit to be seen
I am sorry I thought you would have liked his coming said poor Mr Edmonstone only half conscious of his offence but I see you are not well this evening
Worse and worse for it was equivalent to openly telling Charles he was out of humour and seeing as he did his mothers motive he was still further annoyed when she hastily interposed a question about Sir Guy
You should only hear them talk about him at Redclyffe said Mr Edmonstone No one was ever equal to him according to them Every one said the same—clergyman old Markham all of them Such attention to his grandfather such proper feeling so goodnatured not a bit of pride—it is my firm belief that he will make up for all his family before him
Charles set up his eyebrows sarcastically
How does he get on with Philip inquired Laura
Excellently Just what could be wished Philip is delighted with him and I have been telling Guy all the way home what a capital friend he will be and he is quite inclined to look up to him Charles made an exaggerated gesture of astonishment unseen by his father I told him to bring his dog He would have left it but they seemed so fond of each other I thought it was a pity to part them and that I could promise it should be welcome here eh mamma
Certainly I am very glad you brought it
We are to have his horse and man in a little while A beautiful chestnut—anything to raise his spirits He is terribly cut up about his grandfather
It was now time to go down to dinner and after Charles had made faces of weariness and disgust at all the viands proposed to him by his mother almost imploring him to like them and had at last ungraciously given her leave to send what he could not quite say he disliked he was left to carry on his teasing of Charlotte and his grumbling over the dinner for about the space of an hour when Amabel came back to him and Charlotte went down
Hum he exclaimed Another swan of my fathers
Did not you like his looks
I saw only an angular hobbetyhoy
But every one at Redclyffe speaks so well of him
As if the same things were not said of every heir to more acres than brains However I could have swallowed everything but the disposition to adore Philip Either it was gammon on his part or else the work of my fathers imagination
For shame Charlie
Is it within the bounds of probability that he should be willing at the bidding of his guardian to adopt as Mentor his very correct and sententious cousin a poor subaltern and the next in the entail Depend upon it it is a fiction created either by papas hopes or Philips selfcomplacency or else the unfortunate youth must have been brought very low by straitlacing and milkandwater
Mr Thorndale is willing to look up to Philip
I dont think the Thorndale swan very—very much better than a tame goose said Charles but the coalition is not so monstrous in his case since Philip was a friend of his own picking and choosing and so his fathers adoption did not succeed in repelling him But that Morville should receive this young mans companion on the word of a guardian whom he never set eyes on before is too incredible—utterly mythical I assure you Amy And how did you get on at dinner
Oh the dog is the most delightful creature I ever saw so sensible and wellmannered
It was of the man that I asked
He said hardly anything and sometimes started if papa spoke to him suddenly He winced as if he could not bear to be called Sir Guy so papa said we should call him only by his name if he would do the same by us I am glad of it for it seems more friendly and I am sure he wants to be comforted
Dont waste your compassion my dear few men need it less With his property those moors to shoot over his own master and with health to enjoy it there are plenty who would change with him for all your pity my silly little Amy
Surely not with that horrible ancestry
All very well to plume oneself upon I rather covet that ghost myself
Well if you watched his face I think you would be sorry for him
I am tired of the sound of his name One fifth of November is enough in the year Here find something to read to me among that trumpery
Amy read till she was summoned to tea when she found a conversation going on about Philip on whose history Sir Guy did not seem fully informed Philip was the son of Archdeacon Morville Mrs Edmonstones brother an admirable and superior man who had been dead about five years He left three children Margaret and Fanny twentyfive and twentythree years of age and Philip just seventeen The boy was at the head of his school highly distinguished for application and good conduct he had attained every honour there open to him won golden opinions from all concerned with him and made proof of talents which could not have failed to raise him to the highest university distinctions He was absent from home at the time of his fathers death which took place after so short an illness that there had been no time to summon him back to Stylehurst Very little property was left to be divided among the three and as soon as Philip perceived how small was the provision for his sisters he gave up his hopes of university honours and obtained a commission in the army
On hearing this Sir Guy started forward Noble he cried and yet what a pity If my grandfather had but known it—
Ah I was convinced of that broke in Mr Edmonstone and so I am sure was Philip himself but in fact he knew we should never have given our consent so he acted quite by himself wrote to Lord Thorndale and never said a word even to his sisters till the thing was done I never was more surprised in my life
One would almost envy him the opportunity of making such a sacrifice said Sir Guy yet one must lament it
It was done in a hasty spirit of independence said Mrs Edmonstone I believe if he had got a fellowship at Oxford it would have answered much better
And now that poor Fanny is dead and Margaret married there is all his expensive education thrown away and all for nothing said Mr Edmonstone
Ah said Mrs Edmonstone he planned for them to go on living at Stylehurst so that it would still have been his home It is a great pity for his talent is thrown away and he is not fond of his profession
You must not suppose though that he is not a practical man said Mr Edmonstone I had rather take his opinion than any ones especially about a horse and there is no end to what I hear about his good sense and the use he is of to the other young men
You should tell about Mr Thorndale papa said Laura
Ah that is a feather in master Philips cap besides he is your neighbour—at least his father is
I suppose you know Lord Thorndale said Mrs Edmonstone in explanation
I have seen him once at the Quarter Sessions said Sir Guy but he lives on the other side of Moorworth and there was no visiting
Well this youth James Thorndale the second son was Philips fag
Philip says he was always licking him interposed Charlotte
He kept him out of some scrape or other continued Mr Edmonstone Lord Thorndale was very much obliged to him had him to stay at his house took pretty much to him altogether It was through him that Philip applied for his commission and he has put his son into the same regiment on purpose to have him under Philips eye There he is at Broadstone as gentlemanlike a youth as I would wish to see We will have him to dinner some day and Maurice too—eh mamma Maurice—he is a young Irish cousin of my own a capital fellow at the bottom but a regular thoroughgoing rattle That was my doing I told his father that he could not do better than put him into the —th Nothing like a steady friend and a good example I said and Kilcoran always takes my advice and I dont think he has been sorry Maurice has kept much more out of scrapes of late
O papa exclaimed Charlotte Maurice has been out riding on a hired horse racing with Mr Gordon and the horse tumbled down at the bottom of Easthill and broke its knees
Thats the way said Mr Edmonstone the instant my back is turned
Thereupon the family fell into a discussion of home affairs and thought little more of their silent guest
CHAPTER 3
The hues of bliss more brightly glow
Chastised by sober tints of woe
—GRAY
What use shall I make of him said Charles to himself as he studied Sir Guy Morville who sat by the table with a book in his hand
He had the unformed look of a growing boy and was so slender as to appear taller than he really was He had an air of great activity and though he sat leaning back there was no lounging in his attitude and at the first summons he roused up with an air of alert attention that recalled to mind the eager head of a listening greyhound He had no pretension to be called handsome his eyes were his best feature they were very peculiar of a light hazel darker towards the outside of the iris very brilliant the whites tinted with blue and the lashes uncommonly thick and black the eyebrows were also very dark and of a sharplydefined angular shape but the hair was much lighter loose soft and wavy the natural fairness of the complexion was shown by the whiteness of the upper part of the forehead though the rest of the face as well as the small taper hands were tanned by sunshine and seabreezes into a fresh hardy brown glowing with red on the cheeks
What use shall I make of him proceeded Charless thoughts He wont be worth his salt if he goes on in this way he has got a graver specimen of literature there than I ever saw Philip himself read on a weekday he has been puritanized till he is good for nothing Ill trouble myself no more about him He tried to read but presently looked up again Plague I cant keep my thoughts off him That sober look does not sit on that sunburnt face as if it were native to it those eyes dont look as if the Redclyffe spirit was extinguished
Mrs Edmonstone came in and looking round as if to find some occupation for her guest at length devised setting him to play at chess with Charles Charles gave her an amiable look expressing that neither liked it but she was pretty well used to doing him good against his will and trusted to its coming right in time Charles was a capital chessplayer and seldom found any one who could play well enough to afford him much real sport but he found Sir Guy more nearly a match than often fell to his lot it was a bold dashing game that obliged him to be on his guard and he was once so taken by surprise as to be absolutely checkmated His illhumour evaporated he was delighted to find an opponent worth playing with and henceforth there were games almost every morning or evening though Sir Guy seemed not to care much about them except for the sake of pleasing him
When left to himself Guy spent his time in reading or in walking about the lanes alone He used to sit in the baywindow of the drawingroom with his book but sometimes when they least expected it the girls would find his quick eyes following them with an air of amused curiosity as Amabel waited on Charles and her flowers or Laura drew wrote letters and strove to keep down the piles of books and periodicals under which it seemed as if her brother might some day be stifled—a vain task for he was sure to want immediately whatever she put out of his reach
Laura and Amabel both played and sung the former remarkably well and the first time they had any music after the arrival of Sir Guy his look of delighted attention struck everyone He ventured nearer stood by the piano when they practised and at last joined in with a few notes of so full and melodious a voice that Laura turned round in surprise exclaiming You sing better I than any of us
He coloured I beg your pardon he said I could not help it I know nothing of music
Really said Laura smiling incredulously
I dont even know the notes
Then you must have a very good ear Let us try again
The sisters were again charmed and surprised and Guy looked gratified as people do at the discovery of a faculty which they are particularly glad to possess It was the first time he appeared to brighten and Laura and her mother agreed that it would do him good to have plenty of music and to try to train that fine voice He was beginning to interest them all greatly by his great helpfulness and kindness to Charles as he learnt the sort of assistance he required as well as by the silent grief that showed how much attached he must have been to his grandfather
On the first Sunday Mrs Edmonstone coming into the drawingroom at about halfpast five found him sitting alone by the fire his dog lying at his feet As he started up she asked if he had been here in the dark ever since churchtime
I have not wanted light he answered with a sigh long deep and irrepressible and as she stirred the fire the flame revealed to her the traces of tears She longed to comfort him and said—
This Sunday twilight is a quiet time for thinking
Yes he said how few Sundays ago— and there he paused
Ah you had so little preparation
None That very morning he had done business with Markham and had never been more clear and collected
Were you with him when he was taken ill asked Mrs Edmonstone perceiving that it would be a relief to him to talk
No it was just before dinner I had been shooting and went into the library to tell him where I had been He was well then for he spoke but it was getting dark and I did not see his face I dont think I was ten minutes dressing but when I came down he had sunk back in his chair I saw it was not sleep—I rang—and when Arnaud came we knew how it was His voice became low with strong emotion
Did he recover his consciousness
Yes that was the comfort said Guy eagerly It was after he had been bled that he seemed to wake up He could not speak or move but he looked at me—or—I dont know what I should have done The last words were almost inaudible from the gush of tears that he vainly struggled to repress and he was turning away to hide them when he saw that Mrs Edmonstones were flowing fast
You had great reason to be attached to him said she as soon as she could speak
Indeed indeed I had And after a long silence—He was everything to me everything from the first hour I can recollect He never let me miss my parents How he attended to all my pleasures and wishes how he watched and cared for me and bore with me even I can never know
He spoke in short half sentences of intense feeling and Mrs Edmonstone was much moved by such affection in one said to have been treated with an excess of strictness much compassionating the lonely boy who had lost every family tie in one
When the first pain of the sudden parting has passed said she you will like to remember the affection which you knew how to value
If I had but known said Guy but there was I hasty reckless disregarding his comfort rebelling against—O what would I not give to have those restraints restored
It is what we all feel in such losses said Mrs Edmonstone There is always much to wish otherwise but I am sure you can have the happiness of knowing you were his great comfort
It was what I ought to have been
She knew that nothing could have been more filial and affectionate than his conduct and tried to say something of the kind but he would not listen
That is worst of all he said and you must not trust what they say of me They would be sure to praise me if I was anything short of a brute
A silence ensued while Mrs Edmonstone was trying to think of some consolation Suddenly Guy looked up and spoke eagerly—
I want to ask something—a great favour—but you make me venture You see how I am left alone—you know how little I can trust myself Will you take me in hand—let me talk to you—and tell me if I am wrong as freely as if I were Charles I know it is asking a great deal but you knew my grandfather and it is in his name
She held out her hand and with tears answered—
Indeed I will if I see any occasion
You will let me trust to you to tell me when I get too vehement above all when you see my temper failing Thank you you dont know what a relief it is
But you must not call yourself alone You are one of us now
Yes since you have made that promise said Guy and for the first time she saw the full beauty of his smile—a sort of sweetness and radiance of which eye and brow partook almost as much as the lips It alone would have gained her heart
I must look on you as a kind of nephew she added kindly I used to hear so much of you from my brother
Oh cried Guy lighting up Archdeacon Morville was always so kind to me I remember him very well
Ah I wish— there she paused and added—têteàtête it is not right to wish such things—and Philip is very like his father
I am very glad his regiment is so near I want to know him better
You knew him at Redclyffe when he was staying there
Yes said Guy his colour rising but I was a boy then and a very foolish headstrong one I am glad to meet him again What a grandlooking person he is
We are very proud of him said Mrs Edmonstone smiling I dont think there has been an hours anxiety about him since he was born
The conversation was interrupted by the sound of Charless crutches slowly crossing the hall Guy sprang to help him to his sofa and then without speaking hurried upstairs
Mamma teteatete with the silent one exclaimed Charles
I will not tell you all I think of him said she leaving the room
Hum soliloquised Charles That means that my lady mother has adopted him and thinks I should laugh at her or straightway set up a dislike to him knowing my contempt for heroes and heroworship Its a treat to have Philip out of the way and if it was but possible to get out of hearing of his perfection I should have some peace If I thought this fellow had one spice of the kind Id never trouble my head about him more and yet I dont believe he has such a pair of hawks eyes for nothing
The hawks eyes as Charles called them shone brighter from that day forth and their owner began to show more interest in what passed around Laura was much amused by a little conversation she held with him one day when a party of their younger neighbours were laughing and talking nonsense round Charless sofa He was sitting a little way off in silence and she took advantage of the loud laughing to say
You think this is not very satisfactory And as he gave a quick glance of inquiry—Dont mind saying so Philip and I often agree that it is a pity spend so much time in laughing at nothing—at such nonsense
It is nonsense
Listen—no dont it is too silly
Nonsense must be an excellent thing if it makes people so happy said Guy thoughtfully Look at them they are like—not a picture—that has no life—but a dream—or perhaps a scene in a play
Did you never see anything like it
Oh no All the morning calls I ever saw were formal every one stiff and speaking by rote or talking politics How glad I used to be to get on horseback again But to see these—why it is like the shepherds glimpse at the pixies—as one reads a new book or watches what one only half understands—a rooks parliament or a gathering of seafowl on the Shag Rock
A rooks parliament
The people at home call it a rooks parliament when a whole cloud of rooks settle on some bare wide common and sit there as if they were consulting not feeding only stalking about with drooping wings and solemn black cloaks
You have found a flattering simile said Laura as you know that rooks never open their mouths without cause
Guy had never heard the riddle but he caught the pun instantly and the clear merry sound of his hearty laugh surprised Charles who instantly noted it as another proof that was some life in him
Indeed each day began to make it evident that he had on the whole rather a superabundance of animation than otherwise He was quite confidential with Mrs Edmonstone on whom he used to lavish with boyish eagerness all that interested him carrying her the passages in books that pleased him telling her about Redclyffes affairs and giving her his letters from Markham the steward His head was full of his horse Deloraine which was coming to him under the charge of a groom and the consultations were endless about the means of transport Mr Edmonstone almost as eager about it as he was himself
He did not so quickly become at home with the younger portion of the family but his spirits rose every day He whistled as he walked in the garden and Bustle instead of pacing soberly behind him now capered nibbled his pockets and drew him into games of play which Charles and Amabel were charmed to overlook from the dressingroom window There was Guy leaping bounding racing rolling the dog over tripping him up twitching his ears tickling his feet catching at his tail laughing at Bustles springs contortions and harmless openmouthed attacks while the dog did little less than laugh too with his intelligent amber eyes and black and red mouth Charles began to find a new interest in his listless life in the attempt to draw Guy out and make him give one of his merry laughs In this however he failed when his wit consisted in allusions to the novels of the day of which Guy knew nothing One morning he underwent a regular examination ending in—
Have you read anything
I am afraid I am very ignorant of modern books
Have you read the ancient ones asked Laura
Ive had nothing else to read
Nothing to read but ancient books exclaimed Amabel with a mixture of pity and astonishment
Sanchoniathon Manetho Berosus and Ocellus Lucanus said Guy smiling
There Amy said Charles if he has the Vicar of Wakefield among his ancient books you need not pity him
It is like Philip said Laura he was brought up on the old standard books instead of his time being frittered away on the host of idle modern ones
He was free to concentrate his attention on Sir Charles Grandison said Charles
How could any one do so said Guy How could any one have any sympathy with such a piece of self-satisfaction
Who could Eh Laura said Charles
I never read it said Laura suspecting malice
What is your opinion of perfect heroes continued Charles
Here comes one whispered Amy to her brother blushing at her piece of naughtiness as Philip Morville entered the room
After the first greetings and inquiries after his sister whom he had been visiting Laura told him what they had been saying of the advantage of a scanty range of reading
True said Philip I have often been struck by finding how ignorant people are even of Shakspeare and I believe the blame chiefly rests on the cheap rubbish in which Charlie is nearly walled up there
Ay said Charles and who haunts that rubbish at the beginning of every month I suppose to act as pioneer though whether any one but Laura heeds his warnings remains to be proved
Laura does heed asked Philip well pleased
I made her read me the part of Dombey that hurts womens feelings most just to see if she would go on—the part about little Paul—and I declare I shall think the worse of her ever after—she was so stony hearted that to this day she does not know whether he is dead or alive
I cant quite say I dont know whether he lived or died said Laura for I found Amy in a state that alarmed me crying in the greenhouse and I was very glad to find it was nothing worse than little Paul
I wish you would have read it said Amy and looking shyly at Guy she added—Wont you
Well done Amy said Charles In the very face of the young mans companion
Philip does not really think it wrong said Amy
No said Philip those books open fields of thought and as their principles are negative they are not likely to hurt a person well armed with the truth
Meaning said Charles that Guy and Laura have your gracious permission to read Dombey
When Laura has a cold or toothache
And I said Guy
I am not sure about the expediency for you said Philip it would be a pity to begin with Dickens when there is so much of a higher grade equally new to you I suppose you do not understand Italian
No said Guy abruptly and his dark eyebrows contracted
Philip went on If you did I should not recommend you the translation of I promessi Sponsi one of the most beautiful books in any language You have it in English I think Laura
Laura fetched it Guy with a constrained thank you was going to take it up rather as if he was putting a force upon himself when Philip more quickly took the first volume and eagerly turned over the pages—I cant stand this he said where is the original
It was soon produced and Philip finding the beautiful history of Fra Cristoforo began to translate it fluently and with an admirable choice of language that silenced Charless attempts to interrupt and criticise Soon Guy who had at first lent only reluctant attention was entirely absorbed his eyebrows relaxed a look of earnest interest succeeded his countenance softened and when Fra Cristoforo humbled himself exchanged forgiveness and received il pane del perdono tears hung on his eyelashes
The chapter was finished and with a smothered exclamation of admiration he joined the others in begging Philip to proceed The story thus read was very unlike what it had been to Laura and Amy when they puzzled it out as an Italian lesson or to Charles when he carelessly tossed over the translation in search of Don Abbondios humours and thus between reading and conversation the morning passed very agreeably
At luncheon Mr Edmonstone asked Philip to come and spend a day or two at Hollywell and he accepted the invitation for the next week I will make Thorndale drive me out if you will give him a dinner
Of course of course said Mr Edmonstone we shall be delighted We were talking of asking him a day or two ago eh mamma
Thank you said Philip a family party is an especial treat to him laying a particular stress on the word family party and looking at his aunt
At that moment the butler came in saying Sir Guys servant is come and has brought the horse sir
Deloraine come cried Guy springing up Where
At the door sir
Guy darted out Mr Edmonstone following In another instant however Guy put his head into the room again Mrs Edmonstone wont you come and see him Philip you have not seen Deloraine
Off he rushed and the others were just in time to see the cordial look of honest gladness with which William the groom received his young masters greeting and the delighted recognition between Guy Bustle and Deloraine Guy had no attention for anything else till he had heard how they had prospered on the journey and then he turned to claim his friends admiration for the beautiful chestnut his grandfathers birthday present The ladies admired with earnestness that compensated for want of knowledge, the gentlemen with greater science and discrimination indeed Philip as a connoisseur could not but for the sake of his own reputation discover something to criticise Guys brows drew together again and his eyes glanced as if he was much inclined to resent the remarks as attacks at once on Deloraine and on his grandfather but he said nothing and presently went to the stable with Mr Edmonstone to see about the horses accommodations Philip stood in the hall with the ladies
So I perceive you have dropped the title already observed he to Laura
Yes said Mrs Edmonstone replying for her daughter it seemed to give him pain by reminding him of his loss and he was so strange and forlorn just at first that we were glad to do what we could to make him feel himself more at home
Then you get on pretty well now
The reply was in chorus with variations—Oh excellently
He is so entertaining said Charlotte
He sings so beautifully said Amabel
He is so rightminded said Mrs Edmonstone
So very well informed said Laura
Then it all began again
He plays chess so well said Amy
Bustle is such a dear dog said Charlotte
He is so attentive to Charlie said Mrs Edmonstone going into the drawingroom to her son
Papa says he will make up for the faults of all his ancestors said Amabel
His music oh his music said Laura
Philip said Charlotte earnestly you really should learn to like him
Learn impertinent little puss said Philip smiling why should I not like him
I was sure you would try said Charlotte impressively
Is it hard said Amy But oh Philip you could not help liking his singing
I never heard such a splendid voice said Laura so clear and powerful and yet so wonderfully sweet in the low soft notes And a very fine ear he has a real talent for music
Ah inherited poor fellow said Philip compassionately
Do you pity him for it said Amy smiling
Do you forget said Philip I would not advise you to make much of this talent in public it is too much a badge of his descent
Mamma did not think so said Amy She thought it a pity he should not learn regularly with such a talent so the other day when Mr Radford was giving us a lesson she asked Guy just to sing up and down the scale I never saw anything so funny as old Mr Radfords surprise it was almost like the music lesson in La Figlia del Reggimento he started and looked at Guy and seemed in a perfect transport and now Guy is to take regular lessons
Indeed
But do you really mean said Laura that if your mother had been a musicians daughter and you had inherited her talent that you would be ashamed of it
Indeed Laura said Philip with a smile I am equally far from guessing what I should do if my mother had been anything but what she was as from guessing what I should do if I had a talent for music
Mrs Edmonstone here called her daughters to get ready for their walk as she intended to go to Easthill and they might as well walk with Philip as far as their roads lay together
Philip and Laura walked on by themselves a little in advance of the others Laura was very anxious to arrive at a right understanding of her cousins opinion of Guy
I am sure there is much to like in him she said
There is but is it the highest praise to say there is much to like People are not so cautious when they accept a man in toto
Then do you not
Philips answer was—
He who the lions whelp has nurst
At home with fostering hand
Finds it a gentle thing at first
Obedient to command
Do you think him a lions whelp
I am afraid I saw the lion just now in his flashing eyes and contracted brow There is an impatience of advice a vehemence of manner that I can hardly deem satisfactory I do not speak from prejudice for I think highly of his candour warmth of heart and desire to do right but from all I have seen I should not venture as yet to place much dependence on his steadiness of character or command of temper
He seems to have been very fond of his grandfather in spite of his severity He is but just beginning to brighten up a little
Yes his disposition is very affectionate—almost a misfortune to one so isolated from family ties He showed remarkably well at Redclyffe the other day boyish of course and without much selfcommand but very amiably It is very well for him that he is removed from thence for all the people idolize him to such a degree that they could not fail to spoil him
It would be a great pity if he went wrong
Great for he has many admirable qualities but still they are just what persons are too apt to fancy compensation for faults I never heard that any of his family except perhaps that unhappy old Hugh were deficient in frankness and generosity and therefore these do not satisfy me Observe I am not condemning him I wish to be perfectly just all I say is that I do not trust him till I have seen him tried
Laura did not answer she was disappointed yet there was a justice and guardedness in what Philip said that made it impossible to gainsay it and she was pleased with his confidence She thought how cool and prudent he was and how grieved she should be if Guy justified his doubts and so they walked on in such silence as is perhaps the strongest proof of intimacy She was the first to speak led to do so by an expression of sadness about her cousins mouth What are you thinking of Philip
Of Locksley Hall There is nonsense there is affectation in that Laura there is scarcely poetry but there is power for there is truth
Of Locksley Hall I thought you were at Stylehurst
So I was but the one brings the other
I suppose you went to Stylehurst while you were at St Mildreds Did Margaret take you there
Margaret Not she she is too much engaged with her bookclub and her soirées and her societies of every sort and kind
How did you get on with the Doctor
I saw as little of him as I could and was still more convinced that he does not know what conversation is Hem Philip gave a deep sigh No the only thing to be done at St Mildreds is to walk across the moors to Stylehurst It is a strange thing to leave that tumult of gossip and novelty and hardness and to enter on that quiet autumnal old world with the yellow leaves floating silently down just as they used to do and the atmosphere of stillness round the green churchyard
Gossip repeated Laura Surely not with Margaret
Literary scientific gossip is worse than gossip in a primary sense without pretension
I am glad you had Stylehurst to go to How was the old sextons wife
Very well trotting about on her pattens as merrily as ever
Did you go into the garden
Yes Fannys ivy has entirely covered the south wall and the acacia is so tall and spreading that I longed to have the pruning of it Old Will keeps everything in its former state
They talked on of the old home till the stern bitter look of regret and censure had faded from his brow and given way to a softened melancholy expression
CHAPTER 4
A fig for all dactyls a fig for all spondees
A fig for all dunces and dominie grandees
—SCOTT
How glad I am exclaimed Guy entering the drawingroom
Wherefore inquired Charles
I thought I was too late and I am very glad to find no one arrived and Mr and Mrs Edmonstone not come down
But where have you been
I lost my way on the top of the down I fancied some one told me there was a view of the sea to be had there
And cant you exist without a view of the sea
Guy laughed Everything looks so dull—it is as if the view was dead or imprisoned—walled up by wood and hill and wanting that living ripple heaving and struggling
And your fine rocks said Laura
I wish you could see the Shag stone—a great island mass sloping on one side precipitous on the other with the spray dashing on it If you see it from ever so far off there is still that white foam coming and going—a glancing speck like the light in an eye
Hark a carriage
The young man and the young mans companion said Charles
How can you said Laura What would any one suppose Mr Thorndale to be
Not Philips valet said Charles if it is true that no man is a hero to his valleydesham whereas what is not Philip to the Honourable James Thorndale
Philip Alexander and Bucephalus into the bargain suggested Amy in her demure frightened whisper sending all but Laura into a fit of laughter the harder to check because the steps of the parties concerned were heard approaching
Mr Thorndale was a quiet individual one of those of whom there is least to be said so complete a gentleman that it would have been an insult to call him gentlemanlike agreeable and clever rather than otherwise goodlooking with a highbred air about him so that it always seemed strange that he did not make more impression
A ring at the frontdoor almost immediately followed their arrival
Encore asked Philip looking at Laura with a sort of displeased surprise
Unfortunately yes said Laura drawing aside
One of my uncles family parties said Philip I wish I had not brought Thorndale Laura what is to be done to prevent the tittering that always takes place when Amy and those Harpers are together
Some game said Laura He signed approval but she had time to say no more for her father and mother came down and some more guests entered
It was just such a party that continually grew up at Hollywell for Mr Edmonstone was so fond of inviting that his wife never knew in the morning how many would assemble at her table in the evening But she was used to it and too good a manager even to be called so She liked to see her husband enjoy himself in his goodnatured openhearted way The change was good for Charles and thus it did very well and there were few houses in the neighbourhood more popular than Hollywell
The guests this evening were Maurice de Courcy a wild young Irishman all noise and nonsense a great favourite with his cousin Mr Edmonstone two Miss Harpers daughters of the late clergyman goodnatured secondrate girls Dr Mayerne Charless kind old physician the friend and muchloved counsellor at Hollywell and the present vicar Mr Ross with his daughter Mary
Mary Ross was the greatest friend that the Miss Edmonstones possessed though she being fiveandtwenty they had not arrived at perceiving that they were on the equal terms of youngladyhood
She had lost her mother early and had owed a great deal to the kindness of Mrs Edmonstone as she grew up among her numerous elder brothers She had no girlhood she was a boy till fourteen and then a woman and she was scarcely altered since the epoch of that transition the same in likings tastes and duties Papa was all the world to her and pleasing him had much the same meaning now as then her brothers were like playfellows her delights were still a lesson in Greek from papa a schoolchildrens feast a game at play a new book It was only a pity other people did not stand still too Papa indeed had never grown sensibly older since the year of her mothers death but her brothers were whiskered men with all the cares of the world and no holidays the schoolgirls went out to service and were as a last years brood to an old hen the very children she had fondled were young ladies as old to all intents and purposes as herself and here were even Laura and Amy Edmonstone fallen into that bad habit of growing up though little Amy had still much of the kitten in her composition and could play as well as Charlotte or Mary herself when they had the garden to themselves
Mary took great pains to amuse Charles always walking to see him in the worst weather when she thought other visitors likely to fall and chatting with him as if she was the idlest person in the world though the quantity she did at home and in the parish would be too amazing to be recorded Spirited and decided without superfluous fears and fineries she had a firm robust figure and a rosy goodnatured face with a manner that though perfectly feminine had in it an air of strength and determination
Hollywell was a hamlet two miles from the parish church of Easthill and Mary had thus seen very little of the Edmonstones guest having only been introduced to him after church on Sunday The pleasure on which Charles chiefly reckoned for that evening was the talking him over with her when the ladies came in from the diningroom The Miss Harpers with his sisters gathered round the piano and Mrs Edmonstone sat at Charless feet while Mary knitted and talked
So you get on well with him
He is one of those people who are never in the way and yet you never can forgot their presence said Mrs Edmonstone
His manners are quite the pink of courtesy said Mary
Like his grandfathers said Mrs Edmonstone that oldschool deference and attention is very chivalrous and sits prettily and quaintly on his high spirits and animation I hope it will not wear off
A vain hope said Charles At present he is like that German myth Kaspar Hauser who lived till twenty in a cellar It is lucky for mamma that in his green state he is courtly instead of bearish
Lucky for you too Charlie he spoils you finely
He has the rare perfection of letting me know my own mind I never knew what it was to have my own way before
Is that your complaint Charlie What next said Mary
So you think I have my way do you Mary That is all envy you see and very much misplaced Could you guess what a conflict it is every time I am helped up that mountain of a staircase or the slope of my sofa is altered Last time Philip stayed here every step cost an argument till at last through sheer exhaustion I left myself a dead weight on his hands to be carried up by main strength And after all he is such a great strong fellow that I am afraid he did not mind it so next time I crutched myself down alone and I hope that did provoke him
Sir Guy is so kind that I am ashamed said Mrs Edmonstone It seems as if we had brought him for the sole purpose of waiting on Charles
Half his heart is in his horse said Charles Never had man such delight in the brute creation
They have been his chief playfellows said Mrs Edmonstone The chief of his time was spent in wandering in the woods or on the beach watching them and their ways
I fairly dreamt of that Elysium of his last night said Charles a swamp half frozen on a winters night full of wild ducks Here Charlotte come and tell Mary the roll of Guys pets
Charlotte began There was the seagull and the hedgehog and the fox and the badger and the jay and the monkey that he bought because it was dying and cured it only it died the next winter and a toad and a raven and a squirrel and—
That will do Charlotte
Oh but Mary has not heard the names of all his dogs And Mary he has cured Bustle of hunting my Puss We held them up to each other and Puss hissed horribly but Bustle did not mind it a bit and the other day when Charles tried to set him at her he would not take the least notice
Now Charlotte said Charles waving his hand with a provoking mock politeness have the goodness to return to your friends
Tea over Laura proposed the game of definitions You know it Philip said she you taught us
Yes I learnt it of your sisters Thorndale said Philip
O pray let us have it It must be charming exclaimed Miss Harper on this recommendation
Definitions said Charles contemptuously Dr Johnson must be the hand for them
They are just the definitions not to be found in Johnson said Mr Thorndale Our standing specimen is adversity which may be differently explained according to your taste as a toad with a precious jewel in its head or the test of friendship
The spirit of words said Guy looking eager and interested
Well well try said Charles though I cant say it sounds to me promising Come Maurice define an Irishman
No no dont let us be personal said Laura I had thought of the word happiness We are each to write a definition on a slip of paper then compare them
The game was carried on with great spirit for more than an hour It was hard to say which made most fun Maurice Charles or Guy the last no longer a spectator but an active contributor to the sport When the breakup came Mary and Amabel were standing over the table together collecting the scattered papers and observing that it had been very good fun Some so characteristic said Amy such as Maurices definition of happiness—a row at Dublin
Some were very deep though said Mary if it is not treason I should like to make out whose that other was of happiness
You mean this said Amy Gleams from a brighter world too soon eclipsed or forfeited I thought it was Philips but it is Sir Guys writing How very sad I should not like to think so And he was so merry all the time This is his too I see this one about riches being the freight for which the traveller is responsible
There is a great deal of character in them said Mary I should not have wondered at any of us penniless people philosophizing in the fox and grapes style but for him and at his age—
He has been brought up so as to make the theory of wisdom come early said Philip who was nearer than she thought
Is that intended for disparagement she asked quickly
I think very highly of him he has a great deal of sense and right feeling was Philips sedate answer and he turned away to say some last words to Mr Thorndale
The Rosses were the last to depart Mary in cloak and clogs while Mr Edmonstone lamented that it was in vain to offer the carriage and Mary laughed and thanked and said the walk home with Papa was the greatest of treats in the frost and starlight
Dont I pity you who always go out to dinner in a carriage were her last words to Laura
Well Guy said Charlotte how do you like it
Very much indeed It was very pleasant
You are getting into the fairy ring said Laura smiling
Ay he said smiling too but it does not turn to tinsel Would it if I saw more of it and he looked at Mrs Edmonstone
It would be no compliment to ourselves to say so she answered
I suppose tinsel or gold depends on the using said he thoughtfully there are some lumps of solid gold among those papers I am sure one in particular about a trifle May I see that again I mean—
Little things
On little wings
Bear little souls to heaven
Oh that was only a quotation said Amy turning over the definitions again with him and laughing at some of the most amusing while in the mean time Philip went to help Laura who was putting some books away in the anteroom
Yes Laura he said he has thought mind and soul he is no mere rattle
No indeed Who could help seeing his superiority over Maurice
If only he does not pervert his gifts and if it is not all talk I dont like such excess of openness about his feelings it is too like talking for talkings sake
Mamma says it in the transparency of youthfulness You know he has never been at school so his thoughts come out in security of sympathy without fear of being laughed at But it is very late Good night
The frost turned to rain the next morning and the torrents streamed against the window seeming to have a kind of attraction for Philip and Guy who stood watching them
Guy wondered if the floods would be out at Redclyffe and his cousins were interested by his description of the sudden angry rush of the mountain streams eddying fiercely along bearing with them tree and rock while the valleys became lakes and the little mounds islets and the trees looked strangely out of proportion when only their branches were visible Oh a great flood is famous fun said he
Surely said Philip I have heard a legend of your being nearly drowned in some flood
Yes said Guy I had a tolerable ducking
Oh tell us about it said Amy
Ay I have a curiosity to hear a personal experience of drowning said Charles Come begin at the beginning
I was standing watching the tremendous force of the stream when I saw an unhappy old ram floating along bleating so piteously and making such absurd helpless struggles that I could not help pulling off my coat and jumping in after him It was very foolish for the stream was too strong—I was two years younger then Moreover the beast was very heavy and not at all grateful for any kind intentions and I found myself sailing off to the sea with the prospect of a good many rocks before long but just then an old tree stretched out its friendly arms through the water it stopped the sheep and I caught hold of the branches and managed to scramble up while my friend got entangled in them with his wool—
Omne quum Proteus pecus egit altos
Visere montes
quoted Philip
Ovium et summa genus haesit ulmo
added Guy
Ovium exclaimed Philip with a face of horror Dont you know that O in Ovis is short Do anything but take liberties with Horace
Get out of the tree first Guy said Charles for at present your history seems likely to end with a long ohone
Well Triton—not Proteus—came to the rescue at last said Guy laughing I could not stir and the tree bent so frightfully with the current that I expected every minute we should all go together so I had nothing for it but to halloo as loud as I could No one heard but Triton the old Newfoundland dog who presently came swimming up so eager to help poor fellow that I thought he would have throttled me or hurt himself in the branches I took off my handkerchief and threw it to him telling him to take it to Arnaud who I knew would understand it as a signal of distress
Did he How long had you to wait
I dont know—it seemed long enough before a most welcome boat appeared with some men in it and Triton in an agony They would never have found me but for him for my voice was gone indeed the next thing I remember was lying on the grass in the park and Markham saying Well sir if you do wish to throw away your life let it be for something better worth saving than Farmer Holts vicious old ram
In the language of the great Mr Toots said Charles I am afraid you got very wet
Were you the worse for it said Amy
Not in the least I was so glad to hear it was Holts for you must know that I had behaved very ill to Farmer Holt I had been very angry at his beating our old hound for as he thought worrying his sheep not that Dart ever did though
And was the ram saved
Yes and next time I saw it it nearly knocked me down
Would you do it again said Philip
I dont know
I hope you had a medal from the Humane Society said Charles
That would have been more proper for Triton
Yours should have been an ovation said Charles cutting the o absurdly short and looking at Philip
Laura saw that the spirit of teasing was strong in Charles this morning and suspected that he wanted to stir up what he called the deadly feud and she hastened to change the conversation by saying You quite impressed Guy with your translation of Fra Cristoforo
Indeed I must thank you for recommending the book said Guy how beautiful it is
I am glad you entered into it said Philip it has every quality that a fiction ought to have
I never read anything equal to the repentance of the nameless man
Is he your favourite character said Philip looking at him attentively
Oh no—of course not—though he is so grand that one thinks most about him but no one can be cared about as much as Lucia
Lucia She never struck me as more than a wellpainted peasant girl said Philip
Oh cried Guy indignantly then controlling himself he continued She pretends to no more than she is but she shows the beauty of goodness in itself in a—a—wonderful way And think of the power of those words of hers over that gloomy desperate man
Your sympathy with the Innominato again said Philip Every subject seemed to excite Guy to a dangerous extent as Laura thought and she turned to Philip to ask if he would not read to them again
I brought this book on purpose said Philip I wished to read you a description of that print from Raffaelle—you know it—the Madonna di San Sisto
The one you brought to show us said Amy with the two little angels
Yes here is the description and he began to read—
Dwell on the form of the Child more than human in grandeur seated on the arms of the Blessed Virgin as on an august throne Note the tokens of divine grace His ardent eyes what a spirit what a countenance is His yet His very resemblance to His mother denotes sufficiently that He is of us and takes care for us Beneath are two figures adoring each in their own manner On one side is a pontiff on the other a virgin each a most sweet and solemn example the one of aged the other of maidenly piety and reverence Between are two winged boys evidently presenting a wonderful pattern of childlike piety Their eyes indeed are not turned towards the Virgin but both in face and gesture they show how careless of themselves they are in the presence of God
All were struck by the description Guy did not speak at first but the solemn expression of his face showed how he felt its power and reverence Philip asked if they would like to hear more and Charles assented Amy worked Laura went on with her perspective and Guy sat by her side making concentric circles with her compasses or when she wanted them he tormented her parallel ruler or cut the pencils never letting his fingers rest except at some high or deep passage or when some interesting discussion arose All were surprised when luncheon time arrived Charles held out his hand for the book it was given with a slight smile and he exclaimed Latin I thought you were translating Is it your own property
Yes
Is it very tough I would read it if any one would read it with me
Do you mean me said Guy I should like it very much but you have seen how little Latin I know
That is the very thing said Charles that Ovis of yours was music I would have made you a Knight of the Golden Fleece on the spot Tutors I could get by shoals but a fellowdunce is inestimable
It is a bargain then said Guy if Philip has done with the book and will lend it to us
The luncheon bell rang and they all adjourned to the diningroom Mr Edmonstone came in when luncheon was nearly over rejoicing that his letters were done but then he looked disconsolately from the window and pitied the weather Nothing for it but billiards People might say it was nonsense to have a billiardtable in such a house but for his part he found there was no getting through a wet day without them Philip must beat him as usual and Guy might have one of the young ladies to make a fourth
Thank you said Guy but I dont play
Not play—eh Well we will teach you in the spinning of a ball and Ill have my little Amy to help me against you and Philip
No thank you repeated Guy colouring I am under a promise
Ha Eh What Your grandfather He could see no harm in such play as this For nothing you understand You did not suppose I meant anything else
O no of course not eagerly replied Guy but it is impossible for me to play thank you I have promised never even to look on at a game at billiards
Ah poor man he had too much reason uttered Mr Edmonstone to himself but catching a warning look from his wife he became suddenly silent Guy meanwhile sat looking lost in sad thoughts till rousing himself he exclaimed Dont let me prevent you
Mr Edmonstone needed but little persuasion and carried Philip off to the billiardtable in the front hall
O I am so glad cried Charlotte who had within the last week learnt Guys value as a playfellow Now you will never go to those stupid billiards but I shall have you always every rainy day Come and have a real good game at ball on the stairs
She already had hold of his hand and would have dragged him off at once had he not waited to help Charles back to his sofa and in the mean time she tried in vain to persuade her more constant playmate Amabel to join the game Poor little Amy regretted the being obliged to refuse as she listened to the merry sounds and bouncing balls sighing more than once at having turned into a grownup young lady while Philip observed to Laura who was officiating as billiardmarker that Guy was still a mere boy
The fates favoured Amy at last for about half after three the billiards were interrupted and Philip pronouncing the rain to be almost over invited Guy to take a walk and they set out in a very gray wet mist while Charlotte and Amy commenced a vigorous game at battledore and shuttlecock
The gray mist had faded into twilight and twilight into something like night when Charles was crossing the hall with the aid of Amys arm Charlotte carrying the crutch behind him and Mrs Edmonstone helping Laura with her perspective apparatus all on their way to dress for dinner the door opened and in came the two Morvilles Guy without even stopping to take off his great coat ran at once upstairs and the next moment the door of his room was shut with a bang that shook the house and made them all start and look at Philip for explanation
Redclyffe temper said he coolly with a halfsmile curling his short upper lip
What have you been doing to him said Charles
Nothing At least nothing worthy of such ire I only entered on the subject of his Oxford life and advised him to prepare for it for his education has as yet been a mere farce He used to go two or three days in the week to one Potts a self-educated genius—a sort of superior writingmaster at the Moorworth commercial school Of course though it is no fault of his poor fellow he is hardly up to the fifth form and he must make the most of his time if he is not to be plucked I set all this before him as gently as I could for I knew with whom I had to deal yet you see how it is
What did he say asked Charles
He said nothing so far I give him credit but he strode on furiously for the last half mile and this explosion is the finale I am very sorry for him poor boy I beg no further notice may be taken of it Dont you want an arm Charlie
No thank you answered Charles with a little surliness
You had better It really is too much for Amy said Philip making a move as if to take possession of him as he arrived at the foot of the stairs
Like the camellia I suppose he replied and taking his other crutch from Charlotte he began determinedly to ascend without assistance resolved to keep Philip a prisoner below him as long as he could and enjoying the notion of chafing him by the delay Certainly teasing Philip was a dear delight to Charles though it was all on trust as if he succeeded his cousin never betrayed his annoyance by look or sign
About a quarter of an hour after there was a knock at the dressingroom door Come in said Mrs Edmonstone looking up from her letterwriting and Guy made his appearance looking very downcast
I am come he said to ask pardon for the disturbance I made just now I was so foolish as to be irritated at Philips manner when he was giving me some good advice and I am very sorry
What has happened to your lip she exclaimed
He put his handkerchief to it Is it bleeding still It is a trick of mine to bite my lip when I am vexed It seems to help to keep down words There I have given myself a mark of this hateful outbreak
He looked very unhappy more so Mrs Edmonstone thought than the actual offence required You have only failed in part she said It was a victory to keep down words
The feeling is the thing said Guy besides I showed it plainly enough without speaking
It is not easy to take advice from one so little your elder began Mrs Edmonstone but he interrupted her It was not the advice That was very good I— but he spoke with an effort—I am obliged to him It was—no I wont say what he added his eyes kindling then changing in a moment to a sorrowful resolute tone Yes but I will and then I shall make myself thoroughly ashamed It was his veiled assumption of superiority his contempt for all I have been taught Just as if he had not every right to despise me with his talent and scholarship after such egregious mistakes as I had made in the morning I gave him little reason to think highly of my attainments but let him slight me as much as he pleases he must not slight those who taught me It was not Mr Potts fault
Even the name could not spoil the spirited sound of the speech and Mrs Edmonstone was full of sympathy You must remember she said that in the eyes of a man brought up at public school nothing compensates for the want of the regular classical education I have no doubt it was very provoking
I dont want to be excused thank you said Guy Oh I am grieved for I thought the worst of my temper had been subdued After all that has passed—all I felt—I thought it impossible Is there no hope for— He covered his face with his hands then recovering and turning to Mrs Edmonstone he said It is encroaching too much on your kindness to come here and trouble you with my confessions
No no indeed said she earnestly Remember how we agreed that you should come to me like one of my own children And indeed I do not see why you need grieve in this despairing way for you almost overcame the fit of anger and perhaps you were off your guard because the trial came in an unexpected way
It did it did he said eagerly I dont mind being told point blank that I am a dunce but that Mr Potts—nay by implication—my grandfather should be set at nought in that cool—But here I am again said he checking himself in the midst of his vehemence he did not mean that of course I have no one to blame but myself
I am sure said Mrs Edmonstone that if you always treat your failings in this way you must subdue them at last
It is all failing and resolving and failing again said Guy
Yes but the failures become slighter and less frequent and the end is victory
The end victory repeated Guy in a musing tone as he stood leaning against the mantelshelf
Yes to all who persevere and seek for help said Mrs Edmonstone and he raised his eyes and fixed them on her with an earnest look that surprised her for it was almost as if the hope came home to him as something new At that moment however she was called away and directly after a voice in the next room exclaimed Are you there Guy I want an arm while he for the first time perceived that Charless door was ajar
Charles thought all this a great fuss about nothing indeed he was glad to find there was anyone who had no patience with Philip and in his usual mischievous manner totally reckless of the fearful evil of interfering with the influence for good which it was to be hoped that Philip might exert over Guy he spoke thus I begin to think the world must be more docile than I have been disposed to give it credit for How a certain cousin of ours has escaped numerous delicate hints to mind his own business is to me one of the wonders of the world
No one better deserves that his advice should be followed said Guy with some constraint
An additional reason against it said Charles Plague on that bell I meant to have broken through your formalities and had a candid opinion of Don Philip before it rang
Then I am glad of it I could hardly have given you a candid opinion just at present
Charles was vexed but he consoled himself by thinking that Guy did not yet feel himself out of his leadingstrings and was still on his good behaviour After such a flash as this there was no fear but there was that in him which would create mischief and disturbance enough Charles was well principled at the bottom and would have shrunk with horror had it been set before him how dangerous might be the effect of destroying the chance of a friendship between Guy and the only person whose guidance was likely to be beneficial to him but his idle unoccupied life and habit of only thinking of things as they concerned his immediate amusement made him ready to do anything for the sake of opposition to Philip and enjoy the vague idea of excitement to be derived from anxiety about his fathers ward whom at the same time he regarded with increased liking as he became certain that what he called the Puritan spirit was not native to him
At dinnertime Guy was as silent as on his first arrival and there would have been very little conversation had not the other gentleman talked politics Philip leading the discussion to bear upon the duties and prospects of landed proprietors and dwelling on the extent of their opportunities for doing good He tried to get Guys attention by speaking of Redclyffe of the large circle influenced by the head of the Morville family and of the hopes entertained by Lord Thorndale that this power would prove a valuable support to the rightful cause He spoke in vain the young heir of Redclyffe made answers as brief absent and indifferent as if all this concerned him no more than the Emperor of Morocco and Philip mentally pronouncing him sullen turned to address himself to Laura
As soon as the ladies had left the diningroom Guy roused himself and began by saying to his guardian that he was afraid he was very deficient in classical knowledge that he found he must work hard before going to Oxford and asked whether there was any tutor in the neighbourhood to whom he could apply
Mr Edmonstone opened his eyes as much amazed as if Guy had asked if there was any executioner in the neighbourhood who could cut off his head Philip was no less surprised but he held his peace thinking it was well Guy bad sense enough to propose it voluntarily as he would have suggested it to his uncle as soon as there was an opportunity of doing so in private As soon as Mr Edmonstone had recollected himself and pronounced it to be exceedingly proper c they entered into a discussion on the neighbouring curates and came at last to a resolution that Philip should see whether Mr Lascelles a curate of Broadstone and an old schoolfellow of his own would read with Guy a few hours in every week
After this was settled Guy looked relieved though he was not himself all the evening and sat in his old corner between the plants and the window where he read a grave book instead of talking singing or finishing his volume of Ten Thousand a Year Charlotte was all this time ill at ease She looked from Guy to Philip from Philip to Guy she shut her mouth as if she was forming some great resolve then coloured and looked confused rushing into the conversation with something more malapropos than usual as if on purpose to appear at her ease At last just before her bedtime when the tea was coming in Mrs Edmonstone engaged with that Laura reading Amy clearing Charless little table and Philip helping Mr Edmonstone to unravel the confused accounts of the late cheating bailiff Guy suddenly found her standing by him perusing his face with all the power of her great blue eyes She started as he looked up and put her face into Amabels great myrtle as if she would make it appear that she was smelling to it
Well Charlotte said he and the sound of his voice made her speak but in a frightened embarrassed whisper
Guy—Guy—Oh I beg your pardon but I wanted to—
Well what said he kindly
I wanted to make sure that you are not angry with Philip You dont mean to keep up the feud do you
Feud—I hope not said Guy too much in earnest to be diverted with her lecture I am very much obliged to him
Are you really said Charlotte her head a little on one side I thought he had been scolding you
Scolding was so very inappropriate to Philips calm argumentative way of advising that it became impossible not to laugh
Not scolding then said Charlotte You are too nearly grown up for that but telling you to learn and being tiresome
I was so foolish as to be provoked at first answered Guy but I hope I have thought better of it and am going to act upon it
Charlotte opened her eyes wider than ever but in the midst of her amazement Mrs Edmonstone called to Guy to quit his leafy screen and come to tea
Philip was to return to Broadstone the next day and as Mrs Edmonstone had some errands there that would occupy her longer than Charles liked to wait in the carriage it was settled that Philip should drive her there in the pony phaeton and Guy accompany them and drive back thus having an opportunity of seeing Philips print of the Madonna di San Sisto returning some calls and being introduced to Mr Lascelles whilst she was shopping They appointed an hour and place of meeting and kept to it after which Mrs Edmonstone took Guy with her to call on Mrs Deane the wife of the colonel
It was currently believed among the young Edmonstones that Mamma and Mrs Deane never met without talking over Mr Morvilles good qualities and the present visit proved no exception Mrs Deane a kind openhearted elderly lady was very fond of Mr Morville and proud of him as a credit to the regiment and she told several traits of his excellent judgment kindness of heart and power of leading to the right course Mrs Edmonstone listened and replied with delight and no less pleasure and admiration were seen reflected in her young friends radiant face
Mrs Edmonstones first question as they set out on their homeward drive was whether they had seen Mr Lascelles
Yes said Guy I am to begin to morrow and go to him every Monday and Thursday
That is prompt
Ah I have no time to lose besides I have been leading too smooth a life with you I want something unpleasant to keep me in order Something famously horrid repeated he smacking the whip with a relish as if he would have applied that if he could have found nothing else
You think you live too smoothly at Hollywell said Mrs Edmonstone hardly able with all her respect for his good impulses to help laughing at this strange boy
Yes Happy thoughtless vehement that is what your kindness makes me Was it not a proof that I must needs fly out at such a petty provocation
I should not have thought it such a very exciting life certainly not such as is usually said to lead to thoughtlessness and we have been even quieter than usual since you came
Ah you dont know what stuff I am made of said Guy gravely though smiling your own home party is enough to do me harm it is so exceedingly pleasant
Pleasant things do not necessarily do harm
Not to you not to people who are not easily unsettled but when I go upstairs after a talking merry evening such as the night before last I find that I have enjoyed it too much I am all abroad I can hardly fix my thoughts and I dont know what to do since here I must be and I cant either be silent or sit up in my own room
Certainly not said she smiling there are duties of society which you owe even to us dangerous people
No no dont misunderstand me The fault is in myself If it was not for that I could learn nothing but good said Guy speaking very eagerly distressed at her answer
I believe I understand you said she marvelling at the serious ascetic temper coupled with the very high animal spirits For your comfort I believe the unsettled feeling you complain of is chiefly the effect of novelty You have led so very retired a life that a lively family party is to you what dissipation would be to other people and as you must meet with the world some time or other it is better the first encounter with should be in this comparatively innocent form Go on watching yourself and it will do you no harm
Yes but if I find it does me harm It would be cowardly to run away and resistance should be from within Yet on the other hand there is the duty of giving up wrenching oneself from all that has temptation in it
There is nothing said Mrs Edmonstone that has no temptation in it but I should think the rule was plain If a duty such as that of living among us for the present and making yourself moderately agreeable involves temptations they must be met and battled from within In the same way your position in society with all its duties could not be laid aside because it is full of trial Those who do such things are fainthearted and fail in trust in Him who fixed their station and finds room for them to deny themselves in the trivial round and common task It is pleasure involving no duty that should be given up if we find it liable to lead us astray
I see answered Guy musingly and this reading comes naturally and is just what I wanted to keep the pleasant things from getting a full hold of me I ought to have thought of it sooner instead of dawdling a whole month in idleness Then all this would not have happened I hope it will be very tough
You have no great love for Latin and Greek
Oh cried Guy eagerly to be sure I delight in Homer and the Georgics and plenty more What splendid things there are in these old fellows But I never liked the drudgery part of the affair and now if I am to be set to work to be accurate and to get up all the grammar and the Greek roots it will be horrid enough in all conscience
He groaned as deeply as if he had not been congratulating himself just before on the difficulty
Who was your tutor asked Mrs Edmonstone
Mr Potts said Guy He is a very clever man he had a common grammarschool education but he struggled on—taught himself a great deal—and at last thought it great promotion to be a teacher at the Commercial Academy as they call it at Moorworth where Markhams nephews went to school He is very clever I assure you and very patient of the hard wearing life he must have of it there and oh so enjoying a new book or an afternoon to himself When I was about eight or nine I began with him riding into Moorworth three times in a week and I have gone on ever since I am sure he has done the best he could for me and he made the readings very pleasant by his own enjoyment If Philip had known the difficulties that man has struggled through and his beautiful temper persevering in doing his best and being contented I am sure he could never have spoken contemptuously of him
I am sure he would not said Mrs Edmonstone all he meant was that a person without a university education cannot tell what the requirements are to which a man must come up in these days
Ah said Guy laughing how I wished Mr Potts had been there to have enjoyed listening to Philip and Mr Lascelles discussing some new Lexicon digging down for roots of words and quoting passages of obscure Greek poets at such a rate that if my eyes had been shut I could have thought them two withered old students in spectacles and snuffcoloured coats
Philip was in his element said Mrs Edmonstone smiling
Really proceeded Guy with animation the more I hear and see of Philip the more I wonder What a choice collection of books he has—so many of them school prizes and how beautifully bound
Ah that is one of Philips peculiar ways With all his prudence and his love of books I believe he would not buy one unless he had a reasonable prospect of being able to dress it handsomely Did you see the print
Yes that I did What glorious loveliness There is nothing that does it justice but the description in the lecture Oh I forgot you have not heard it You must let me read it to you by and by Those two little angels what faces they have Perfect innocence—one full of reasoning, the other of unreasoning adoration
I see it suddenly exclaimed Mrs Edmonstone I see what you are like in one of your looks not by any means in all—it is to the larger of those two angels
Very seldom I should guess said Guy and sinking his voice as if he was communicating a most painful fact he added My real likeness is old Sir Hughs portrait at home But what were we saying Oh about Philip How nice those stories were of Mrs Deanes
She is very fond of him
To have won so much esteem and admiration already from strangers with no prejudice in his favour—It must be entirely his own doing and well it may Every time one hears of him something comes out to make him seem more admirable You are laughing at me and I own it is presumptuous to praise but I did not mean to praise only to admire
I like very much to hear my nephew praised I was only smiling at your enthusiastic way
I only wonder I am not more enthusiastic said Guy I suppose it is his plain good sense that drives away that sort of feeling for he is as near heroism in the way of self-sacrifice as a man can be in these days
Poor Philip if disappointment can make a hero it has fallen to his share Ah Guy you are brightening and looking like one of my young ladies in hopes of a tale of true love crossed but it was only love of a sister
The sister for whom he gave up so much
Yes his sister Margaret She was eight or nine years older very handsome very clever a good deal like him—a pattern elder sister indeed she brought him up in great part after his mother died and he was devoted to her I do believe it made the sacrifice of his prospects quite easy to him to know it was for her sake that she would live on at Stylehurst and the change be softened to her Then came Fannys illness and that lead to the marriage with Dr Henley It was just what no one could object to he is a respectable man in full practice with a large income but he is much older than she is not her equal in mind or cultivation and though I hardly like to say so not at all a religious man At any rate Margaret Morville was one of the last people one could bear to see marry for the sake of an establishment
Could her brother do nothing
He expostulated with all his might but at nineteen he could do little with a determined sister of twentyseven and the very truth and power of his remonstrance must have made it leave a sting Poor fellow I believe he suffered terribly—just as he had lost Fanny too which he felt very deeply for she was a very sweet creature and he was very fond of her It was like losing both sisters and home at once
Has he not just been staying with Mrs Henley
Yes There was never any coolness as people call it He is the one thing she loves and is proud of They always correspond and he often stays with her but he owns to disliking the Doctor and I dont think he has much comfort in Margaret herself for he always comes back more grave and stern than he went Her house with all her good wishes can be no home to him and so we try to make Hollywell supply the place of Stylehurst as well as we can
How glad he must be to have you to comfort him
Philip Oh no He was always reserved open to no one but Margaret not even to his father and since her marriage he has shut himself up within himself more than ever It has at least I think it is this that has given him a severity an unwillingness to trust which I believe is often the consequence of a great disappointment either in love or in friendship
Thank you for telling me said Guy I shall understand him better and look up to him more Oh it is a cruel thing to find that what one loves is or has not been all one thought What must he not have gone through
Mrs Edmonstone was well pleased to have given so much assistance to Guys sincere desire to become attached to his cousin one of the most favourable signs in the character that was winning so much upon her
CHAPTER 5
A cloud was oer my childhoods dream
I sat in solitude
I know not how—I know not why
But round my soul all drearily
There was a silent shroud
—THOUGHTS IN PAST YEARS
Mrs Edmonstone was anxious to hear Mr Lascelles opinion of his pupil and in time she learnt that he thought Sir Guy had very good abilities and a fair amount of general information but that his classical knowledge was far from accurate and mathematics had been greatly neglected He had been encouraged to think his work done when he had gathered the general meaning of a passage or translated it into English verse spirited and flowing but often further from the original than he or his tutor could perceive He had never been taught to work at least as other boys study and great application would be requisite to bring his attainments to a level with those of far less clever boys educated at a public school
Mr Lascelles told him so at first but as there were no reflections on his grandfather or on Mr Potts Guys lip did not suffer and he only asked how many hours a day he ought to read Three said Mr Lascelles with a due regard to a probable want of habits of application but then remembering how much was undone he added that it ought to be four or more if possible
Four it shall be said Guy five if I can
His whole strength of will was set to accomplish these four hours taking them before and after breakfast working hard all the morning till the last hour before luncheon when he came to read the lectures on poetry with Charles Here for the first time it appeared that Charles had so entirely ceased to consider him as company as to domineer over him like his own family
Used as Guy had been to an active outofdoors life and now turned back to authors he had read long ago to fight his way through the construction of their language not excusing himself one jot of the difficulty nor turning aside from one mountain over which his own efforts could carry him he found his work as tough and tedious as he could wish or fear and by the end of the morning was thoroughly fagged Then would have been the refreshing time for recreation in that pleasant idlingplace the Hollywell drawingroom Any other time of day would have suited Charles as well for the reading but he liked to take the hour at noon and never perceived that this made all the difference to his friend of a toil or a pleasure Now and then Guy gave tremendous yawns and once when Charles told him he was very stupid proposed a different time but as Charles objected he yielded as submissively as the rest of the household were accustomed to do
To watch Guy was one of Charless chief amusements and he rejoiced greatly in the prospect of hearing his history of his first dinnerparty Mr Mrs and Miss Edmonstone and Sir Guy Morville were invited to dine with Mr and Mrs Brownlow Mr Edmonstone was delighted as usual with any opportunity of seeing his neighbours Guy looked as if he did not know whether he liked the notion or not Laura told him it would be very absurd and stupid but there would be some good music and Charles ordered her to say no more that he might have the account the next morning from a fresh and unprejudiced mind
The next mornings question was of course How did you like your party
O it was great fun Guys favourite answer was caught up in the midst as Laura replied It was just what parties always are
Come let us have the history Who handed who in to dinner I hope Guy had Mrs Brownlow
Oh no said Laura we had both the honourables
Not Philip
No said Guy the fidus Achetes was without his pious Aeneas
Very good Guy said Charles enjoying the laugh
I could not help thinking of it said Guy rather apologising when I was watching Thorndales manner it is such an imitation of Philip looking droller I think in his absence than in his presence I wonder if he is conscious of it
It does not suit him at all said Mrs Edmonstone because he has no natural dignity
A man ought to be six foot one person and mind to suit with that grand sedate gracious way of Philips said Guy
Theres Guys measure of Philips intellect said Charles just six foot one inch
As much more than other peoples twice his height said Guy
Who was your neighbour Laura asked Amy
Dr Mayerne I was very glad of him to keep off those hunting friends of Mr Brownlow who never ask anything but if one has been to the races and if one likes balls
And how did Mrs Brownlow behave said Charles
She is a wonderful woman said Mrs Edmonstone in her quiet way and Guy with an expression between drollery and simplicity said Then there arent many like her
I hope not said Mrs Edmonstone
Is she really a lady
Philip commonly calls her that woman said Charles He has never got over her one night classing him with his young man and myself as three of the shyest monkeys she ever came across
She wont say so of Maurice said Laura as they recovered the laugh
I heard her deluding some young lady by saying he was the eldest son said Mrs Edmonstone
Mamma cried Amy could she have thought so
I put in a gentle hint on Lord de Courcys existence to which she answered in her quick way O ay I forgot but then he is the second and thats the next thing
If you could but have heard the stories she and Maurice were telling each other said Guy He was playing her off I believe for whatever she told he capped it with something more wonderful Is she really a lady
By birth said Mrs Edmonstone It is only her high spirits and small judgment that make her so absurd
How loud she is too said Laura What was all that about horses Guy
She was saying she drove two such spirited horses that all the grooms were afraid of them and when she wanted to take out her little boy Mr Brownlow said You may do as you like my dear but I wont have my sons neck broken whatever you do with your own So Maurice answered by declaring he knew a lady who drove not two but fourinhand and when the leaders turned round and looked her in the face gave a little nod and said Im obliged for your civility
Oh I wish I had heard that cried Laura
Did you hear her saying she smoked cigars
Everyone cried out with horror or laughter
Of course Maurice told a story of a lady who had a cigar case hanging at her chatelaine and always took one to refresh her after a ball
Guy was interrupted by the announcement of his horse and rode off at once to Mr Lascelles
On his return he went straight to the drawingroom where Mrs Edmonstone was reading to Charles and abruptly exclaimed—
I told you wrong She only said she had smoked one cigar Then perceiving that he was interrupting he added I beg your pardon and went away
The next evening on coming in from a solitary skating he found the younger party in the drawingroom Charles entertaining the Miss Harpers with the story of the cigars He hastily interposed—
I told you it was but one
Ay tried one and went on She was preparing an order for Havannah
I thought I told you I repeated the conversation incorrectly
If it is not the letter it is the spirit said Charles vexed at the interference with his sport of amazing the Miss Harpers with outrageous stories of Mrs Brownlow
It is just like her said one of them I could believe anything of Mrs Brownlow
You must not believe this said Guy gently I repeated incorrectly what had better have been forgotten and I must beg my foolish exaggeration to go no further
Charles became sullenly silent Guy stood thoughtful and Laura and Amabel could not easily sustain the conversation till the visitors took their leave
Heres a pother grumbled Charles as soon as they were gone
I beg your pardon for spoiling your story said Guy but it was my fault so I was obliged to interfere
Bosh said Charles Who cares whether she smoked one or twenty She is Mrs Brownlow still
The point is what was truth said Laura
Straining at gnats said Charles
Little wings said Guy glancing at Amabel
Have it your won way said Charles throwing his head back they must be little souls indeed that stick at such trash
Guys brows were contracted with vexation but Laura looked up very prettily saying—
Never mind him We must all honour you for doing such an unpleasant thing
You will recommend him favourably to Philip growled Charles
There was no reply and presently Guy asked whether he would go up to dress Having no other way of showing his displeasure he refused and remained nursing his illhumour till he forgot how slight the offence had been and worked himself into a sort of insane desire—half mischievous half revengeful—to be as provoking as he could in his turn
Seldom had he been more contrary as his old nurse was wont to call it No one could please him and Guy was not allowed to do anything for him Whatever he said was intended to rub on some sore place in Guys mind His mother and Lauras signs made him worse for he had the pleasure of teasing them also but Guy endured it all with perfect temper and he grew more cross at his failure yet from force of habit at bedtime he found himself on the stairs with Guys arm supporting him
Good night said Charles I tried hard to poke up the lion tonight but I see it wont do
This plea of trying experiments was neither absolutely true nor false but it restored Charles to himself by saving a confession that he had been out of temper and enabling him to treat with him wonted indifference the expostulations of father mother and Laura
Now that the idea of poking up the lion had once occurred it became his great occupation to attempt it He wanted to see some evidence of the fiery temper and it was a new sport to try to rouse it one too which had the greater relish as it kept the rest of the family on thorns
He would argue against his real opinion talk against his better sense take the wrong side and say much that was very far from his true sentiments Guy could not understand at first and was quite confounded at some of the views he espoused till Laura came to his help greatly irritating her brother by hints that he was not in earnest Next time she could speak to Guy alone she told him he must not take all Charles said literally
I thought he could hardly mean it but why should he talk so
I cant excuse him I know it is very wrong and at the expense of truth and it is very disagreeable of him—I wish he would not but he always does what he likes and it is one of his amusements so we must bear with him poor fellow
From that time Guy seemed to have no trouble in reining in his temper in arguing with Charles except once when the lion was fairly roused by something that sounded like a sneer about King Charles I
His whole face changed his hazel eye gleamed with light like an eagles and he started up exclaiming—
You did not mean that
Ask Strafford answered Charles coolly startled but satisfied to have found the vulnerable point
Ungenerous unmanly said Guy his voice low but quivering with indignation ungenerous to reproach him with what he so bitterly repented Could not his penitence could not his own blood—but as he spoke the gleam of wrath faded the flush deepened on the cheek and he left the room
Ha soliloquized Charles Ive done it I could fancy his wrath something terrific when it was once well up I didnt know what was coming next but I believe he has got himself pretty well in hand It is playing with edge tools and now I have been favoured with one flash of the Morville eye Ill let him alone but it ryled me to be treated as something beneath his anger like a woman or a child
In about ten minutes Guy came back I am sorry that I was hasty just now said he
I did not know you had such personal feelings about King Charles
If you would do me a kindness proceeded Guy you would just say you did not mean it I know you do not but if you would only say so
I am glad you have the wit to see I have too much taste to be a roundhead
Thank you said Guy I hope I shall know your jest from your earnest another time Only if you would oblige me you would never jest again about King Charles
His brow darkened into a stern grave expression so entirely in earnest that Charles though making no answer could not do otherwise than feel compliance unavoidable Charles had never been so entirely conquered yet strange to say he was not as usual rendered sullen
At night when Guy had taken him to his room he paused and said—You are sure that you have forgiven me
What You have not forgotten that yet said Charles
Of course not
I am sorry you bear so much malice said Charles smiling
What are you imagining cried Guy It was my own part I was remembering as I must you know
Charles did not choose to betray that he did not see the necessity
I thought King Charless wrongs were rankling I only spoke as taking liberties with a friend
Yes said Guy thoughtfully it may be foolish but I do not feel as if one could do so with King Charles He is too near home he suffered to much from scoffs and railings his heart was too tender his repentance too deep for his friends to add one word even in jest to the heap of reproach How one would have loved him proceeded Guy wrapped up in his own thoughts—loved him for the gentleness so little accordant with the rude times and the part he had to act—served him with half like a knights devotion to his ladylove half like devotion to a saint as Montrose did—
Great good and just could I but rate
My grief and thy too rigid fate
Id weep the world in such a strain
As it should deluge once again
And oh cried he with sudden vehemence how one would have fought for him
You would said Charles I should like to see you and Deloraine charging at the head of Prince Ruperts troopers
I beg your pardon said Guy suddenly recalled and colouring deeply I believe I forgot where I was and have treated you to one of my old dreams in my boatings at home You may quiz me as much as you please tomorrow Good night
It was a rhapsody thought Charles yes it was I wonder I dont laugh at it but I was naturally carried along Fancy that He did it so naturally in fact it was all from the bottom of his heart and I could not quiz him—no no more than Montrose himself He is a strange article But he keeps one awake which is more than most people do
Guy was indeed likely to keep every one awake just then for Mr Edmonstone was going to take him out hunting for the first time and he was half wild about it The day came and half an hour before Mr Edmonstone was ready Guy was walking about the hall checking many an incipient whistle and telling every one that he was beforehand with the world for he had read one extra hour yesterday and had got through the others before breakfast Laura thought it very true that as Philip said he was only a boy and moralized to Charlotte on his being the same age as herself—very nearly eighteen Mrs Edmonstone told Charles it was a treat to see any one so happy and when he began to chafe at the delay did her best to beguile the time but without much success Guy had ever learned to wait patiently and had a custom of marching up and down and listening with his head thrown back or as Charles used to call it prancing in the hall
If Mrs Edmonstones patience was tried by the preparation for the hunt in the morning it was no less her lot to hear of it in the evening Guy came home in the highest spirits pouring out his delight to every one with animation and power of description giving all he said a charm The pleasure did not lose by repetition he was more engrossed by it every time and no one could be more pleased with his ardour than Mr Edmonstone who proud of him and his riding gave a sigh to past hopes of poor Charles and promoted the hunting with far more glee that he had promoted the reading
The Redclyffe groom William whose surname of Robinson was entirely forgotten in the appellation of William of Deloraine was as proud of Sir Guy as Mr Edmonstone could be but made representations to his master that he must not hunt Deloraine two days in the week and ride him to Broadstone two more Guy then walked to Broadstone but William was no better pleased for he thought the credit of Redclyffe compromised and punished him by reporting Deloraine not fit to be used next hunting day Mr Edmonstone perceived that Guy ought to have another hunter Philip heard of one for sale and after due inspection all admired—even William who had begun by remarking that there might be so many screwlooses about a horse that a man did not know what to be at with them
Philip who was conducting the negotiation came to dine at Hollywell to settle the particulars Guy was in a most eager state and they and Mr Edmonstone talked so long about horses that they sent Charles to sleep his mother began to read and the two elder girls fell into a low mysterious confabulation of their own till they were startled by a question from Philip as to what could engross them so deeply
It was said Laura a banshee story in Eveleen de Courcys last letter
I never like telling ghost stories to people who dont believe in them half whispered Amabel to her sister
Do you believe them asked Philip looking full at her
Now I wont have little Amy asked the sort of question she most dislikes interposed Laura I had rather ask if you laugh at us for thinking many ghost stories inexplicable
Certainly not
The universal belief could hardly be kept up without some grounds said Guy
That would apply as well to fairies said Philip
Every one has an unexplained ghost story said Amy
Yes said Philip but I would give something to meet any one whose ghost story did not rest on the testimony of a friends cousins cousin a very strongminded person
I cant imagine how a person who has seen a ghost could ever speak of it said Amy
Did you not tell us a story of pixies at Redclyffe said Laura
O yes the people there believe in them firmly Jonas Ledbury heard them laughing one night when he could not get the gate open said Guy
Ah You are the authority for ghosts said Philip
I forgot that said Laura I wonder we never asked you about your Redclyffe ghost
You look as if you had seen it yourself said Philip
You have not exclaimed Amy almost frightened
Come let us have the whole story said Philip Was it your own reflection in the glass was it old sir Hugh or was it the murderer of Becket Come the ladies are both ready to scream at the right moment Never mind about giving him a cockedhat for with whom may you take a liberty if not with an ancestral ghost of your own
Amy could not think how Philip could have gone on all this time perhaps it was because he was not watching how Guys colour varied how he bit his lip and at last his eyes seemed to grow dark in the middle and to sparkle with fire as with a low deep tone like distant thunder conveying a tremendous force of suppressed passion he exclaimed Beware of trifling— then breaking off hastened out of the room
Whats the matter asked Mr Edmonstone startled from his nap and his wife looked up anxiously but returned to her book as her nephew replied Nothing
How could you Philip said Laura
I really believe he has seen it said Amy in a startled whisper
He has felt it Amy—the Morville spirit said Philip
It is a great pity you spoke of putting a cocked hat to it said Laura he must have suspected us of telling you what happened about Mrs Brownlow
And are you going to do it now said her sister in a tone of remonstrance
I think Philip should hear it said Laura and she proceeded to relate the story She was glad to see that her cousin was struck with it he admired this care to maintain strict truth and even opened a memorandumbook—the sight of which Charles dreaded—and read the following extract Do not think of one falsity as harmless and another as slight and another as unintended Cast them all aside They may be light and accidental but they are an ugly soot from the smoke of the pit for all that and it is better that our hearts should be swept clean of them without over care as to which is the largest or blackest
Laura and Amy were much pleased but he went on to regret that such excellent dispositions should be coupled with such vehemence of character and that unhappy temper Amy was glad that her sister ventured to hint that he might be more cautious in avoiding collisions
I am cautious replied he quickly and sternly I am not to be told of the necessity of exercising forbearance with this poor boy but it is impossible to reckon on all the points on which he is sensitive
He is sensitive said Laura I dont mean only in temper but in everything I wonder if it is part of his musical temperament to be as keenly alive to all around as his ear is to every note A bright day a fine view is such real happiness to him he dwells on every beauty of Redclyffe with such affection and then when he reads Charles says it is like going over the story again himself to watch his face act it in that unconscious manner
He makes all the characters so real in talking them over said Amy and he does not always know how they will end before they begin
I should think it hardly safe for so excitable a mind to dwell much on the world of fiction said Philip
Nothing has affected him so much as Sintram said Laura I never saw anything like it He took it up by chance and stood reading it while all those strange expressions began to flit over his face and at last he fairly cried over it so much that he was obliged to fly out of the room How often he has read it I cannot tell I believe he has bought one for himself and it is as if the engraving had a fascination for him he stands looking at it as if he was in a dream
He is a great mystery said Amy
All men are mysterious said Philip but he not more than others though he may appear so to you because you have not had much experience, and also because most of the men you have seen have been rounded into uniformity like marbles their sharp angles rubbed off against each other at school
Would it be better if there were more sharp angles said Laura thus setting on foot a discussion on public schools on which Philip had of course a great deal to say
Amys kind little heart was meanwhile grieving for Guy and longing to see him return but he did not come till after Philips departure He looked pale and mournful his hair hanging loose and disordered and her terror was excited lest he might actually have seen his ancestors ghost which in spite of her desire to believe in ghosts in general she did not by any means wish to have authenticated He was surprised and a good deal vexed to find Philip gone but he said hardly anything and it was soon bedtime When Charles took his arm he exclaimed on finding his sleeve wet—What can you have been doing
Walking up and down under the wall replied Guy with some reluctance
What in the rain
I dont know perhaps it was
Amy who was just behind carrying the crutch dreaded Charless making any allusion to Sintrams wild locks and evening wanderings but ever since the outburst about King Charles the desire to tease and irritate Guy had ceased
They parted at the dressingroom door and as Guy bade her good night he pushed back the damp hair that had fallen across his forehead saying I am sorry I disturbed your evening I will tell you the meaning of it another time
He has certainly seen the ghost said silly little Amy as she shut herself into her own room in such a fit of vague eerie fright that it was not till she had knelt down and with her face hidden in her hands said her evening prayer that she could venture to lift up her head and look into the dark corners of the room
Another time Her heart throbbed at the promise
The next afternoon as she and Laura were fighting with a refractory branch of wisteria which had been torn down by the wind and refused to return to its place Guy who had been with his tutor came in from the stableyard reduced the trailing bough to obedience and then joined them in their walk He looked grave was silent at first and then spoke abruptly—It is due to you to explain my behaviour last night
Amy thinks you must have seen the ghost said Laura trying to be gay
Did I frighten you said Guy turning round full of compunction No no I never saw it I never even heard of its being seen I am very sorry
I was very silly said Amy smiling
But proceeded Guy when I think of the origin of the ghost story I cannot laugh and if Philip knew all—
Oh He does not cried Laura he only looks on it as we have always done as a sort of romantic appendage to Redclyffe I should think better of a place for being haunted
I used to be proud of it said Guy I wanted to make out whether it was old Sir Hugh or the murderer of Becket who was said to groan and turn the lock of Dark Hughs chamber I hunted among old papers and a horrible story I found That wretched Sir Hugh—the same who began the quarrel with your mothers family—he was a courtier of Charles II as bad or worse than any of that crew—
What was the quarrel about said Laura
He was believed to have either falsified or destroyed his fathers will so as to leave his brother your ancestor landless his brother remonstrated and he turned him out of doors The forgery never was proved but there was little doubt of it There are traditions of his crimes without number especially his furious anger and malice He compelled a poor lady to marry him though she was in love with another man then he was jealous he waylaid his rival shut him up in the turret chamber committed him to prison and bribed Judge Jeffries to sentence him—nay it is even said he carried his wife to see the execution He was so execrated that he fled the country he went to Holland curried favour with William of Orange brought his wealth to help him and that is the deserving action which got him the baronetcy He served in the army a good many years and came home when he thought his sins would be forgotten But do you remember those lines and Guy repeated them in the low rigid tone almost of horror in which he had been telling the story—
On some his vigorous judgments light
In that dread pause twixt day and night
Lifes closing twilight hour
Round some ere yet they meet their doom
Is shed the silence of the tomb
The eternal shadows lower
It was so with him he lost his senses and after many actions of mad violence he ended by hanging himself in the very room where he had imprisoned his victim
Horrible said Laura Yet I do not see why when it is all past you should feel it so deeply
How should I not feel it answered Guy Is it not written that the sins of the fathers shall be visited on the children You wonder to see me so foolish about Sintram Well it is my firm belief that such a curse of sin and death as was on Sintram rests on the descendants of that miserable man
The girls were silent struck with awe and dismay at the fearful reality with which he pronounced the words At last Amy whispered But Sintram conquered his doom
At the same time Laura gathered her thoughts together and said This must be an imagination You have dwelt on it and fostered it till you believe it but such notions should be driven away or they will work their own fulfilment
Look at the history of the Morvilles and see if it be an imagination said Guy Crime and bloodshed have been the portion of each—each has added weight and darkness to the doom which he had handed on My own poor father with his early death was perhaps the happiest
Laura saw the idea was too deeply rooted to be treated as a fancy and she found a better argument The doom of sin and death is on us all but you should remember that if you are a Morville you are also a Christian
He does remember it said Amy raising her eyes to his face and then casting them down blushing at having understood his countenance where in the midst of the gloomy shades there rested for an instant the gleam which her mother had likened to the expression of Raffaelles cherub
They walked on for some time in silence At last Laura exclaimed Are you really like the portrait of this unfortunate Sir Hugh
Guy made a sign of assent
Oh It must have been taken before he grew wicked said Amy and Laura felt the same conviction that treacherous revenge could never have existed beneath so open a countenance with so much of highmindedness pure faith and contempt of wrong in every glance of the eagle eye in the frank expansion of the smooth forehead
They were interrupted by Mr Edmonstones hearty voice bawling across the garden for one of the men O Guy are you there cried he as soon as he saw him Just what I wanted Your gun man We are going to ferret a rabbit
Guy ran off at full speed in search of his gun whistling to Bustle Mr Edmonstone found his man and the sisters were again alone
Poor fellow said Laura
You will not tell all this to Philip said Amy
It would show why he was hurt and it can be no secret
I dare say you are right but I have a feeling against it Well I am glad he had not seen the ghost
The two girls had taken their walk and were just going in when looking round they saw Philip walking fast and determinedly up the approach and as they turned back to meet him the first thing he said was Where is Guy
Ferreting rabbits with papa What is the matter
And where is my aunt
Driving out with Charles and Charlotte What is the matter
Look here Can you tell me the meaning of this which I found on my table when I came in this morning
It was a card of Sir Guy Morville on the back of which was written in pencil Dear P I find hunting and reading dont agree so take no further steps about the horse Many thanks for your trouble—GM
There said Philip is the result of brooding all night on his resentment Oh no cried Laura colouring with eagerness you do not understand him He could not bear it last night because as he has been explaining to us that old Sir Hughs story was more shocking than we ever guessed and he has a fancy that their misfortunes are a family fate and he could not bear to hear it spoken of lightly
Oh He has been telling you his own story has he
Lauras colour grew still deeper If you had been there she said you would have been convinced Why will you not believe that he finds hunting interfere with reading
He should have thought of that before said Philip
Here have I half bought the horse I have wasted the whole morning on it and now I have to leave it on the mans hands I had a dozen times rather take it myself if I could afford it Such a bargain as I had made and such an animal as you will not see twice in your life
It is a great pity said Laura He should have known his own mind I dont like people to give trouble for nothing
Crazy about it last night and giving it up this morning A most extraordinary proceeding No no Laura this is not simple fickleness it would be too absurd It is temper temper which makes a man punish himself in hopes of punishing others
Laura still spoke for Guy and Amy rejoiced for if her sister had not taken up the defence of the absent she must and she felt too strongly to be willing to speak It seemed too absurd for one feeling himself under such a doom to wrangle about a horse yet she was somewhat amused by the conviction that if Guy had really wished to annoy Philip he had certainly succeeded
There was no coming to an agreement Lauras sense of justice revolted at the notion of Guys being guilty of petty spite while Philip firm in his preconceived idea of his character and his own knowledge of mankind was persuaded that he had imputed the true motive and was displeased at Lauras attempting to argue the point He could not wait to see any one else as he was engaged to dine out and he set off again at his quick resolute pace
He is very unfair exclaimed Amy
He did not mean to be so said Laura and though he is mistaken in imputing such motives Guys conduct has certainly been vexatious
They were just turning to go in when they were interrupted by the return of the carriage and before Charles had been helped up the steps their father and Guy came in sight While Guy went to shut up Bustle who was too wet for the drawingroom Mr Edmonstone came up to the others kicking away the pebbles before him and fidgeting with his gloves as he always did when vexed
Heres a pretty go said he Here is Guy telling me he wont hunt any more
Not hunt cried Mrs Edmonstone and Charles at once and why
Oh something about its taking his mind from his reading but that cant be it—impossible you know Id give ten pounds to know what has vexed him So keen as he was about it last night and I vow one of the best riders in the whole field Giving up that horse too—I declare it is a perfect sin I told him he had gone too far and he said he had left a note with Philip this morning
Yes said Laura Philip has just been here about it Guy left a card saying hunting and reading would not agree
That is an excuse depend upon it said Mr Edmonstone Something has nettled him I am sure It could not be that Gordon could it with his hailfellowwellmet manner I thought Guy did not half like it the other day when he rode up with his Hollo Morville The Morvilles have a touch of pride of their own eh mamma
I should be inclined to believe his own account of himself said she
I tell you tis utterly against reason said Mr Edmonstone angrily If he was a fellow like Philip or James Ross I could believe it but he—he make a bookworm He hates it like poison at the bottom of his heart Ill answer for it and the worst of it is the fellow putting forward such a fair reason one cant—being his guardian and all—say what one thinks of it oneself Eh mamma
Not exactly said Mrs Edmonstone smiling
Well you take him in hand mamma I dare say he will tell you the rights of it and if it is only that Gordon explain it rightly to him show him tis only the mans way tell him he treats me so for ever and would the LordLieutenant if he was in it
For a that and a that said Charles as Amy led him into the drawingroom
You are sure the reading is the only reason said Amy
Hes quite absurd enough for it said Charles but absurd was pronounced in a way that made its meaning far from annoying even to Guys little champion
Guy came in the next moment and running lightly upstairs after Mrs Edmonstone found her opening the dressingroom door and asked if he might come in
By all means she said I am quite ready for one of our twilight talks
I am afraid I have vexed Mr Edmonstone began Guy and I am very sorry
He was only afraid that something might have occurred to vex you which you might not like to mention to him said Mrs Edmonstone hesitating a little
Me What could I have done to make him think so I am angry with no one but myself The fact is only this the hunting is too pleasant it fills up my head all day and all night and I dont attend rightly to anything else If I am out in the morning and try to pay for it at night it will not do I can but just keep awake and thats all the Greek letters all seem to be hunting each other the simplest things grow difficult and at last all I can think of is how near the minute hand of my watch is near to the hour I have set myself So for the last fortnight every construing with Mr Lascelles has been worse than the last and as to my Latin verses they were beyond everything shocking so you see there is no making the two things agree and the hunting must wait till I grow steadier if I ever do Heigho It is a great bore to be so stupid for I thought—But it is of no use to talk of it
Mr Edmonstone would be a very unreasonable guardian indeed to be displeased said his friend smiling You say you stopped the purchase of the horse Why so Could you not keep him till you are more sure of yourself
Do you think I might joyously exclaimed Guy Ill write to Philip this minute by the post Such a splendid creature it would do you good to see it—such action—such a neck—such spirit It would be a shame not to secure it But no—no— and he checked himself sorrowfully I have made my mind before that I dont deserve it If it was here it would always have to be tried if I heard the hounds I dont know I should keep from riding after them whereas now I cant for William wont let me take Deloraine No I cant trust myself to keep such a horse and not hunt It will serve me right to see Mr Brownlow on it and he will never miss such a chance and the depth of his sigh bore witness to the struggle it cost him
I should not like to use anyone as you use yourself said Mrs Edmonstone looking at him with affectionate anxiety which seemed suddenly to change the current of his thought for he exclaimed abruptly—Mrs Edmonstone can you tell me anything about my mother
I am afraid not said she kindly you know we had so little intercourse with your family that I heard little but the bare facts
I dont think said Guy leaning on the chimneypiece that I ever thought much about her till I knew you but lately I have fancied a great deal about what might have been if she had but lived
It was not Mrs Edmonstones way to say half what she felt and she went on—Poor thing I believe she was quite a child
Only seventeen when she died said Guy
Mrs Edmonstone went to a drawer took out two or three bundles of old letters and after searching in them by the firelight said—Ah heres a little about her it is in a letter from my sisterinlaw Philips mother when they were staying at Stylehurst
Who My father and mother cried Guy eagerly
Did you not know they had been there three or four days
No—I know less about them than anybody said he sadly but as Mrs Edmonstone waited doubtful as to whether she might be about to make disclosures for which he was unprepared he added hastily—I do know the main facts of the story I was told them last autumn and an expression denoting the remembrance of great suffering came over his face then pausing a moment he said—I knew Archdeacon Morville had been very kind
He was always interested about your father said Mrs Edmonstone and happening to meet him in London some little time after his marriage he—he was pleased with the manner in which he was behaving then thought—thought— And here recollecting that she must not speak ill of old Sir Guy nor palliate his sons conduct poor Mrs Edmonstone got into an inextricable confusion—all the worse because the fierce twisting of a penwiper in Guys fingers denoted that he was suffering a great trial of patience She avoided the difficulty thus It is hard to speak of such things when there is so much to be regretted on both sides but the fact was my brother thought your father was harshly dealt with at that time Of course he had done very wrong but he had been so much neglected and left to himself that it seemed hardly fair to visit his offence on him as severely as if he had had more advantages So it ended in their coming to spend a day or two at Stylehurst and this is the letter my sisterinlaw wrote at the time
Our visitors have just left us and on the whole I am much better pleased than I expected The little Mrs Morville is a very pretty creature and as engaging as long flaxen curls appleblossom complexion blue eyes and the sweetest of voices can make her so full of childish glee and playfulness that no one would stop to think whether she was ladylike any more than you would with a child She used to go singing like a bird about the house as soon as the first strangeness wore off which was after her first game of play with Fanny and Little Philip She made them very fond of her as indeed she would make every one who spent a day or two in the same house with her I could almost defy Sir Guy not to be reconciled after one sight of her sweet sunny face She is all affection and gentleness and with tolerable training anything might be made of her but she is so young in mind and manners that one cannot even think of blaming her for her elopement for she had no mother no education but in music and her brother seems to have forced it on thrown her in Mr Morvilles way and worked on his excitable temperament until he hurried them into marriage Poor little girl I suppose she little guesses what she has done but it was very pleasant to see how devotedly attached he seemed to her and there was something beautiful in the softening of his impetuous tones when he said Marianne and her pride in him was very pretty like a child playing at matronly airs
Guy gave a long heavy sigh brushed away a tear and after a long silence said Is that all
All that I like to read to you Indeed there is no more about her and it would be of no use to read all the reports that were going about—Ah here said Mrs Edmonstone looking into another letter she speaks of your father as a very fine young man with most generous impulses—but here again she was obliged to stop for the next sentence spoke of a noble character ruined by mismanagement She never saw them again continued Mrs Edmonstone Mr Dixon your mothers brother had great influence with your father and made matters worse—so much worse that my brother did not feel himself justified in having any more to do with them
Ah he went to America said Guy I dont know any more about him except that he came to the funeral and stood with his arms folded not choosing to shake hands with my poor grandfather After another silence he said Will you read that again and when he had heard it he sat shading his brow with his hand as if to bring the fair girlish picture fully before his mind while Mrs Edmonstone sought in vain among her letters for one which did not speak of the fiery passions ignited on either side in terms too strong to be fit for his ears
When next he spoke it was to repeat that he had not been informed of the history of his parents till within the last few months He had of course known the manner of their death but had only lately become aware of the circumstances attending it
The truth was that Guy had grown up peculiarly shielded from evil but ignorant of the cause of the almost morbid solicitude with which he was regarded by his grandfather He was a very happy joyous boy leading an active enterprising life though so lonely as to occasion greater dreaminess and thoughtfulness than usual at such an early age He was devotedly attached to his grandfather looking on him as the first and best of human beings and silencing the belief that Sir Hugh Morville had entailed a doom of crime and sorrow on the family by a reference to him as one who had been always good and prosperous
When however Guy had reached an age at which he must encounter the influences which had proved so baneful to others of his family his grandfather thought it time to give him the warning of his own history
The sins which the repentance of years had made more odious in the eyes of the old man were narrated the idleness and insubordination at first then the reckless pursuit of pleasure the craving for excitement the defiance of rule and authority till folly had become vice and vice had led to crime
He had fought no fewer than three duels and only one had been bloodless His misery after the first had wellnigh led to a reform but time had dulled its acuteness—it had been lost in fresh scenes of excitement—and at the next offence rage had swept away such recollections Indeed so far had he lost the natural generosity of his character that his remorse had been comparatively slight for the last which was the worst of all since he had forced the quarrel on his victim Captain Wellwood whose death had left a wife and children almost destitute His first awakening to a sense of what his course had been was when he beheld his only child in the prime of youth carried lifeless across his threshold and attributed his death to his own intemperance and violence That hour made Sir Guy Morville an old and a brokenhearted man and he repented as vigorously as he had sinned
From the moment he dared to hope that his sons orphan would be spared he had been devoted to him but still mournfully envying and pitying his innocence as something that could not last
He saw bright blossoms put forth as the boy grew older but they were not yet fruits and he did not dare to believe they ever would be The strength of will which had in his own case been the slave of his passions had been turned inward to subdue the passions themselves but this was only the beginning—the trial was not yet come He could hope his grandson might repent but this was the best that he dared to think possible He could not believe that a Morville could pass unscathed through the world or that his sins would not be visited on the head of his only descendant and the tone of his narration was throughout such as might almost have made the foreboding cause its own accomplishment
The effect was beyond what he had expected for a soul deeply dyed in guilt even though loathing its own stains had not the power of conceiving how foul was the aspect of vice to one hitherto guarded from its contemplation and living in a world of pure, lofty daydreams The boy sat the whole time without a word his face bent down and hidden by his clasped hands only now and then unable to repress a start or shudder at some fresh disclosure and when it was ended he stood up gazed round and walked uncertainly as if he did not know where he was His next impulse was to throw himself on his knee beside his grandfather and caress him as he used to when a child The goodnight was spoken and Guy was shut into his room with his overwhelming emotions
His grandfather a bloodstained remorseful man The doom was complete himself heir to the curse of Sir Hugh and fated to run the same career and as he knew full well with the tendency to the family character strong within him the germs of these hateful passions ready to take root downwards and bear fruit upwards with the very countenance of Sir Hugh and the same darkening kindling eyes of which traditions had preserved the remembrance
He was crushed for awhile The consciousness of strength not his own of the still small voice that could subdue the fire the earthquake and the whirlwind was slow in coming to him and when it came he like his grandfather had hope rather of final repentance than of keeping himself unstained
His mind had not recovered the shock when his grandfather died—died in faith and fear with good hope of accepted repentance but unable to convey the assurance of such hope to his grandson Grief for the only parent he had ever known and the sensation of being completely alone in the world were joined to a vague impression of horror at the suddenness of the stroke and it was long before the influence of Hollywell or the elasticity of his own youthfulness could rouse him from his depression
Even then it was almost against his will that he returned to enjoyment unable to avoid being amused but feeling as if joy was not meant for him and as if those around were walking in a world of light where he could scarcely hope to tread a few uncertain steps In this despondency was Guys chief danger as it was likely to make him deem a struggle with temptation fruitless while his high spirits and powers of keen enjoyment increased the peril of recklessness in the reaction
It was Mrs Edmonstone who first spoke with him cheerfully of a successful conflict with evil and made him perceive that his temptations were but such as is common to man She had given him a clue to discover when and how to trust himself to enjoy the story of Sintram had stirred him deeply and this very day Amys words seemingly unheeded and unheard had brought home to him the hope and encouragement of that marvellous tale
They had helped him in standing looking steadfastly upwards and treading down not merely evil but the first token of coming evil regardless of the bruises he might inflict on himself Well for him if he was constant
Such was Guys inner life his outward life frank and joyous has been shown and the two flowed on like a stream pure as crystal but into which the eye cannot penetrate from its depth The surface would be sometimes obscured by cloud or shade and reveal the sombre wells beneath but more often the sunshine would penetrate the inmost recesses and make them glance and sparkle showing themselves as clear and limpid as the surface itself
CHAPTER 6
Can piety the discord heal
Or stanch the deathfeuds enmity
—Scott
It must not be supposed that such a history of Guys mind was expressed by himself or understood by Mrs Edmonstone but she saw enough to guess at his character perceive the sort of guidance he needed and be doubly interested in him Much did she wish he could have such a friend as her brother would have been and hope that nothing would prevent a friendship with her nephew
The present question about the horse was she thought unfortunate since though Guy had exercised great selfdenial it was no wonder Philip was annoyed Mr Edmonstones vexation was soon over As soon as she had persuaded him that there had been no offence he strove to say with a good grace that it was very proper and told Guy he would be a thorough bookworm and tremendous scholar which Guy took as an excellent joke
Philip had made up his mind to be forbearing and to say no more about it Laura thought this a pity as they could thus never come to an understanding but when she hinted it he wore such a dignified air of not being offended that she was much ashamed of having tried to direct one so much better able to judge On his side Guy had no idea the trouble he had caused so after bestowing his thanks in a gay offhand way which Philip thought the worst feature of the case he did his best to bring Hecuba back into his mind drive the hunters out of it and appease the muchaggrieved William of Deloraine
When all Williams manoeuvres resulted in his masters not hunting at all he was persuaded it was Mr Edmonstones fault compassionated Sir Guy with all his heart and could only solace himself by taking Deloraine to exercise where he was most likely to meet the hounds He further chose to demonstrate that he was not Mr Edmonstones servant by disregarding some of his stable regulations but as soon as this came to his masters knowledge a few words were spoken so sharp and stern that William never attempted to disobey again
It seemed as if it was the perception that so much was kept back by a strong force that made Guys least token of displeasure so formidable A village boy whom he caught misusing a poor dog was found a few minutes after by Mr Ross in a state of terror that was positively ludicrous though it did not appear that Sir Guy had said or done much to alarm him it was only the light in his eyes and the strength of repressed indignation in his short broken words that had made the impression
It appeared as if the force of his anger might be fearful if once it broke forth without control yet at the same time he had a gentleness and attention alike to small and great which with his high spirit and good nature his very sweet voice and pleasant smile made him a peculiarly winning and engaging person and few who saw him could help being interested in him
No wonder he had become in the eyes of the Edmonstones almost a part of their family Mrs Edmonstone had assumed a motherly control over him to which he submitted with a sort of affectionate gratitude
One day Philip remarked that he never saw any one so restless as Guy who could neither talk nor listen without playing with something Scissors pencil paperknife or anything that came in his way was sure to be twisted or tormented or if nothing else was at hand he opened and shut his own knife so as to put all the spectators in fear for his fingers
Yes said Laura I saw how it tortured your eyebrows all the time you were translating Schiller to us I wondered you were not put out
I consider that to be put out—by which you mean to have the intellect at the mercy of anothers folly—is beneath a reasonable creature said Philip but that I was annoyed I do not deny It is a token of a restless illregulated mind
Restless perhaps said Mrs Edmonstone but not necessarily illregulated I should think it rather a sign that he had no one to tell him of the tricks which mothers generally nip in the bud
I was going to say that I think he fidgets less said Laura but I think his chief contortions of the scissors have been when Philip has been here
They have I believe said her mother I was thinking of giving him a hint
Well aunt you are a tamer of savage beasts if you venture on such a subject said Philip
Do you dare me she asked smiling
Why I dont suppose he would do more than give you one of his lightning glances but that I think is more than you desire
Considerably said Mrs Edmonstone for his sake as much as my own
But said Laura mamma has nearly cured him of pawing like a horse in the hall when he is kept waiting He said he knew it was impatience and begged her to tell him how to cure it So she treated him as an old fairy might and advised him in a grave mysterious way always to go and play the Harmonious Blacksmith when he found himself getting into a taking just as if it was a charm And he always does it most dutifully
It has a very good effect said Mrs Edmonstone for it is apt to act as a summons to the other party as well as a sedative to him
I must say I am curious to see what you will devise this time said Philip since you cant set him to play on the piano and very few can bear to be told of a trick of the kind
In the course of that evening Philip caused the great atlas to be brought out in order to make investigations on the local habitation of a certain Khan of Kipchack who existed somewhere in the dark ages Then he came to Marco Polo and Sir John Mandeville and Guy who knew both the books in the library at Redclyffe grew very eager in talking them over and tracing their adventures—then to the Genoese merchants where Guy confessed himself perfectly ignorant Andrea Doria was the only Genoese he ever heard of but he hunted out with great interest all the localities of their numerous settlements Then came modern Italy and its fallen palaces then the contrast between the republican merchant and aristocratic lord of the soil then the corn laws and then and not till then did Philip glance at his aunt to show her Guy balancing a Venetian weight on as few of his fingers as could support it
Guy said she smiling does that unfortunate glass inspire you with any arguments in favour of the Venetians
Guy put it down at once and Philip proceeded to improved methods of farming to enable landlords to meet the exigencies of the times Guy had got hold of Mr Edmonstones spectaclecase and was putting its spring to a hard trial Mrs Edmonstone doubted whether to interfere again she knew this was not the sort of thing that tried his temper yet she particularly disliked playing him off as it were for Philips amusement and quite as much letting him go on and lower himself in her nephews estimation The spectaclecase settled the matter—a crack was heard it refused to snap at all and Guy much discomfited made many apologies
Amy laughed Philip was much too wellbred to do anything but curl his lip unconsciously Mrs Edmonstone waited till he was gone then when she was wishing Guy goodnight at Charless door she said—
The spectaclecase forestalled me in giving you a lecture on sparing our nerves Dont look so very full of compunction—it is only a trick which your mother would have stopped at five years old and which you can soon stop for yourself
Thank you I will said Guy I hardly knew I did it but I am very sorry it has teased you
Thenceforward it was curious to see how he put down and pushed away all he had once begun to touch and torture Mrs Edmonstone said it was self command in no common degree and Philip allowed that to cure so inveterate a habit required considerable strength of will
However he said I always gave the Morvilles credit for an iron resolution Yes Amy you may laugh but if a man is not resolute in a little he will never be resolute in great matters
And Guy has been resolute the right way this time said Laura
May he always be the same said Philip
Philip had undertaken on his way back to Broadstone to conduct Charlotte to Easthill where she was to spend the day with a little niece of Mary Ross She presently came down her bonnetstrings tied in a most resolutelooking bow and her little figure drawn up so as to look as womanly is possible for her first walk alone with Philip She wished the party at home goodbye and as Amy and Laura stood watching her they could not help laughing to see her tripping feet striving to keep step her blue veil discreetly composed and her little head turned up as if she was trying hard to be on equal terms with the tall cousin who meanwhile looked graciously down from his height patronising her like a very small child After some space Amy began to wonder what they could talk about or whether they would talk at all but Laura said there was no fear of Charlottes tongue ever being still and Charles rejoined—
Dont you know that Philip considers it due to himself that his audience should never be without conversation suited to their capacity
Nonsense Charlie
Nay I give him credit for doing it as well as it is in nature of things for it to be done The strongest proof I know of his being a superior man is the way he adapts himself to his company He lays down the law to us because he knows we are all born to be his admirers he calls Thorndale his dear fellow and conducts him like a Mentor but you may observe how different he is with other people—Mr Ross for instance It is not showing off it is just what the pattern hero should be with the pattern clergyman At a dinner party he is quite in his place contents himself with leaving an impression on his neighbour that Mr Morville is at home on every subject and that he is the right thing with his brother officers is sufficiently proved since not even Maurice either hates or quizzes him
Well Charlie said Laura well pleased I am glad you are convinced at last
Do you think I ever wanted to be convinced that we were created for no other end than to applaud Philip I was fulfilling the object of our existence by enlarging on a remark of Guys that nothing struck him more than the way in which Philip could adapt his conversation to the hearers So the hint was not lost on me and I came to the conclusion that it was a far greater proof of his sense than all the maxims he lavishes on us
I wonder Guy was the person to make the remark said Laura for it is strange that those two never appear to the best advantage together
Oh Laura that would be the very reason said Amy
The very reason said Charles Draw out your meaning Miss
Yes said Amy colouring If Guy—if a generous person I mean—were vexed with another sometimes it would be the very reason he would make the most of all his goodness
Heighho yawned Charles What oclock is it I wonder when Guy is ever coming back from that Lascelles
Your wonder need not last long said Laura for I see him riding into the stable yard
In a few minutes he had entered and on being asked if he had met Philip and Charlotte and how they were getting on he replied—A good deal like the print of Dignity and Impudence at the same time throwing back his shoulders and composing his countenance to imitate Philips lofty deportment and sedate expression and the next moment putting his head on one side with a sharp little nod and giving a certain espiegle glance of the eye and knowing twist of one corner of the mouth just like Charlotte
By the by added he would Philip have been a clergyman if he had gone to Oxford
I dont know I dont think it was settled said Laura Why
I could never fancy him one said Guy He would not have been what he is now if he had gone to Oxford said Charles He would have lived with men of the same powers and pursuits with himself and have found his level
And that would have been a very high one said Guy
It would but there would be all the difference there is between a feudal prince and an Eastern despot He would know what it is to live with his match
But you dont attempt to call him conceited cried Guy with a sort of consternation
He is far above that far too grand said Amy
I should as soon think of calling Jupiter conceited said Charles and Laura did not know how far to be gratified or otherwise
Charles had not overestimated Philips readiness of self adaptation Charlotte had been very happy with him talking over the Lady of the Lake which she had just read and being enlightened partly to her satisfaction partly to her disappointment as to how much was historical He listened goodnaturedly to a fit of rapture and threw in a few not too many discreet words of guidance to the true principles of taste and next told her about an island in a pond at Stylehurst which had been by turns Ellens isle and Robinson Crusoes It was at this point in the conversation that Guy came in sight riding slowly his reins on his horses neck whistling a slow melancholy tune his eyes fixed on the sky and so lost in musings that he did not perceive them till Philip arrested him by calling out That is a very bad plan No horse is to be trusted in that way especially such a spirited one
Guy started and gathered up his reins owning it was foolish
You look only half disenchanted yet said Philip Has Lascelles put you into what my fathers old gardener used to call a stud
Nothing so worthy of a stud said Guy smiling and colouring a little I was only dreaming over a picture of ruin—
The steed is vanishd from the stall
No serf is seen in Hassans hall
The lonely spiders thin grey pall
Waves slowly widening oer the wall
Byron exclaimed Philip I hope you are not dwelling on him
Only a volume I found in my room
Oh the Giaour said Philip Well there is no great damage done but it is bad food for excitable minds Dont let it get hold of you
Very well and there was a cloud but it cleared in a moment and with a few gay words to both he rode off at a quick pace
Foolish fellow muttered Philip looking after him
After some space of silence Charlotte began in a very grave tone—
Philip
Well
Philip
Another Well and another long pause
Philip I dont know whether youll be angry with me
Certainly not said Philip marvelling at what was coming
Guy says he does not want to keep up the feud and I wish you would not
What do you mean
The deadly feud said Charlotte
What nonsense is this said Philip
Surely—Oh Philip there always was a deadly feud between our ancestors and the Redclyffe Morvilles and it was very wrong and ought not to be kept up now
It is not I that keep it up
Is it not said Charlotte But I am sure you dont like Guy And I cant think why not unless it is the deadly feud for we are all so fond of him Laura says it is a different house since he came
Hum said Philip Charlotte you did well to make me promise not to be angry with you by which I presume you mean displeased I should like to know what put this notion into your head
Charlie told me almost whispered Charlotte hanging down her head And—and—
And what I cant hear
Charlotte was a good deal frightened but either from firmness or from the female propensity to have the last word or it might be the spirit of mischief she got out—You have made me quite sure of it yourself
She was so alarmed at having said this that had it not been undignified she would have run quite away and never stopped till she came to Easthill Matters were not mended when Philip said authoritatively and as if he was not in the least bit annoyed which was the more vexatious What do you mean Charlotte
She had a great mind to cry by way of getting out of the scrape but having begun as a counsellor and peacemaker it would never do to be babyish and on his repeating the question she said in a tone which she could not prevent from being lachrymose You make Guy almost angry you tease him and when people praise him you answer as if it would not last And it is very unfair of you concluded she with almost a sob
Charlotte replied Philip much more kindly than she thought she deserved after the reproach that seemed to her so dreadfully naughty you may dismiss all fear of deadly feud whatever you may mean by it Charles has been playing tricks on you You know my little cousin that I am a Christian and we live in the nineteenth century
Charlotte felt as if annihilated at the aspect of her own folly He resumed—You misunderstood me I do think Guy very agreeable He is very attentive to Charles very kind to you and so attractive that I dont wonder you like him But those who are older than you see that he has faults and we wish to set him on his guard against them It may be painful to ourselves and irritating to him but depend upon it it is the proof of friendship Are you satisfied my little cousin
She could only say humbly I beg your pardon
You need not ask pardon Since you had the notion, it was right to speak as it was to me one of your own family When you are older you need never fear to speak out in the right place I am glad you have so much of the right sort of feminine courage though in this case you might have ventured to trust to me
So ended Charlottes anxieties respecting the deadly feud and she had now to make up her mind to the loss of her playfellow who was to go to Oxford at Easter when he would be just eighteen his birthday being the 28th of March Both her playmates were going Bustle as well as Guy and it was at first proposed that Deloraine should go too but Guy bethought himself that Oxford would be a place of temptation for William and not choosing to trust the horse to any one else resolved to leave both at Hollywell
His grandfather had left an allowance for Guy until his coming of age such as might leave no room for extravagance and which even Philip pronounced to be hardly sufficient for a young man in his position You know said Mr Edmonstone in his hesitating goodnatured way if ever you have occasion sometimes for a little—a little more—you need only apply to me Dont be afraid anything rather than run into debt You know me and tis your own
This shall do said Guy in the same tone as he had fixed his hours of study
Each of the family made Guy a birthday present as an outfit for Oxford Mr Edmonstone gave him a set of studs Mrs Edmonstone a Christian Year Amabel copied some of his favourite songs Laura made a drawing of Sintram Charlotte worked a kettleholder with what was called by courtesy a likeness of Bustle Charles gave nothing professing that he would do nothing to encourage his departure
You dont know what a bore it is to lose the one bit of quicksilver in the house said he yawning I shall only drag on my existence till you come back
You Charles the maker of fun said Guy amazed
It is a case of flint and steel said Charles but be it owing to who it will we have been alive since you came here You have taken care to be remembered We have been studying you or laughing at you or wondering what absurdity was to come next
I am very sorry—that is if you are serious I hoped at least I appeared like other people
Ill tell you what you appear like Just what I would be if I was a free man
Never say that Charlie
Nay wait a bit I would never be so foolish I would never give my sunny mornings to Euripides I would not let the best hunter in the county go when I had wherewithal to pay for him
You would not have such an illconditioned self to keep in rule
After all continued Charles yawning it is no great compliment to say I am sorry you are going If you were an Ethiopian serenader you would be a loss to me It is something to see anything beyond this old drawingroom and the same faces doing the same things every day Laura poking over her drawing and meditating upon the last entry in Philips memorandumbook and Amy at her flowers or some nonsense or other and Charlotte and the elders all the same and a lot of stupid people dropping in and a lot of stupid books to read all just alike I can tell what they are like without looking in Charles yawned again sighed and moved wearily Now there came some life and freshness with you You talk of Redclyffe and your brute creation there not like a book and still less like a commonplace man you are innocent and unsophisticated and take new points of view you are something to interest oneself about your coming in is something to look forward to you make the singing not such mere milkandwater your reading the Praelectiones is an additional landmark to time besides the mutton of today succeeding the beef of yesterday Heighho Ill tell you what Guy Though I may carry it off with a high hand tis no joke to be a helpless log all the best years of a mans life—nay for my whole life—for at the very best of the contingencies the doctors are always flattering me with I should make but a wretched crippling affair of it And if that is the best hope they give me you may guess it is likely to be a pretty deal worse Hope Ive been hoping these ten years and much good has it done me I say Guy he proceeded in a tone of extreme bitterness though with a sort of smile the only wonder is that I dont hate the very sight of you There are times when I feel as if I could bite some men—that Tomfool Maurice de Courcy for instance when I hear him rattling on and think—
I know I have often talked thoughtlessly I have feared afterwards I might have given you pain
No no you never have you have carried me along with you I like nothing better than to hear of your ridings and shootings and boatings It is a sort of life
Charles had never till now alluded seriously to his infirmity before Guy and the changing countenance of his auditor showed him to be much affected as he stood leaning over the end of the sofa with his speaking eyes earnestly fixed on Charles who went on
And now you are going to Oxford You will take your place among the men of your day You will hear and be heard of You will be somebody And I—I know I have what they call talent—I could be something They think me an idle dog but wheres the good of doing anything I only know if I was not—not condemned to—to this—this life had it not been for a sort of involuntary respect to the gentle compassion of the softened hazel eyes regarding him so kindly he would have used the violent expletive that trembled on his lip if I was not chained down here Master Philip should not stand alone as the paragon of the family Ive as much mother wit as he
That you have said Guy How fast you see the sense of a passage You could excel very much if you only tried
Tried And what am I to gain by it
I dont know that one ought to let talents rust said Guy thoughtfully I suppose it is ones duty not and surely it is a pity to give up those readings
I shall not get such another fellow dunce as you said Charles as I told you when we began and it would be a mere farce to do it alone I could not make myself if I would
Cant you make yourself do what you please said Guy as if it was the simplest thing in the world
Not a bit if the other half of me does not like it I forget it or put it off and it comes to nothing I do declare though I would get something to break my mind on merely as a medical precaution just to freshen myself up if I could find any one to do it with No nothing in the shape of a tutor against that I protest
Your sisters suggested Guy
Hum Laura is too intellectual already and I dont mean to poach on Philips manor and if I made little Amy cease to be silly I should do away with all the comfort I have left me in life I dont know though if she swallowed learning after Mary Rosss pattern that it need do her much harm
Amy came into the room at the moment Amy here is Guy advising me to take you to read something awfully wise every day something that will make you as dry as a stick and as blue—
As a gentianella said Guy
I should not mind being like a gentianella said Amy But what dreadful thing were you setting him to do
To make you read all the folios in my uncles old library said Charles All that Margaret has in keeping against Philip has a house of his own
Sancho somebody and all you talked of when first you came said Amy
We were talking of the hours reading that Charlie and I have had together lately said Guy
I was thinking how Charlie would miss that hour said Amy and we shall be very sorry not to have you to listen to
Well then Amy suppose you read with me
Oh Charlie thank you Should you really like it cried Amy colouring with delight I have always thought it would be so very delightful if you would read with me as James Ross used with Mary only I was afraid of tiring you with my stupidity Oh thank you
So it was settled and Charles declared that he put himself on honour to give a good account of their doings to Guy that being the only way of making himself steady to his resolution but he was perfectly determined not to let Philip know anything about the practice he had adopted since he would by no means allow him to guess that he was following his advice
Charles had certainly grown very fond of Guy in spite of his propensity to admire Philip satisfying himself by maintaining that after all Guy only tried to esteem his cousin because he thought it a point of duty just as children think it right to admire the good boy in a story book but that he was secretly fretted and chafed by his perfection No one could deny that there were often occasions when little misunderstandings would arise and that but for Philips coolness and Guys readiness to apologise they might often have gone further but at the same time no one could regret these things more than Guy himself and he was willing and desirous to seek Philips advice and assistance when needed In especial he listened earnestly to the counsel which was bestowed on him about Oxford and Mrs Edmonstone was convinced that no one could have more anxiety to do right and avoid temptation She had many talks with him in her dressingroom promising to write to him as did also Charles and he left Hollywell with universal regrets most loudly expressed by Charlotte who would not be comforted without a lock of Bustles hair which she would have worn round her neck if she had not been afraid that Laura would tell Philip
He goes with excellent intentions said Philip as they watched him from the door
I do hope he will do well said Mrs Edmonstone
I wish he may said Philip the agreeableness of his whole character makes one more anxious It is very dangerous His name his wealth his sociable gay disposition that very attractive manner all are so many perils and he has not that natural pleasure in study that would be of itself a preservative from temptation However he is honestly anxious to do right and has excellent principles I only fear his temper and his want of steadiness Poor boy I hope he may do well
CHAPTER 7
—Pray good shepherd what
Fair swain is this that dances with your daughter
He sings several times faster than youll tell money
he utters them as he had eaten ballads and all mens
ears grow to his tunes
—WINTERS TALE
It was a glorious day in June the sky of pure deep dazzling blue the sunshine glowing with brightness but with cheerful freshness in the air that took away all sultriness the sun tending westward in his long days career and casting welcome shadows from the tall firs and horsechestnuts that shaded the lawn A long rank of haymakers—men and women—proceeded with their rakes the white shirtsleeves straw bonnets and ruddy faces radiant in the bath of sunshine while in the shady end of the field were idler haymakers among the fragrant piles Charles half lying on the grass with his back against a tall haycock Mrs Edmonstone sitting on another book in hand Laura sketching the busy scene the sun glancing through the chequered shade on her glossy curls Philip stretched out at full length hat and necktie off luxuriating in the cool repose after a dusty walk from Broadstone and a little way off Amabel and Charlotte pretending to make hay but really building nests with it throwing it at each other and playing as heartily as the heat would allow
They talked and laughed the rest were too hot too busy or too sleepy for conversation even Philip being tired into enjoying the dolce far niente and they basked in the fresh breezy heat and perfumy hay with only now and then a word till a cold black damp nose was suddenly thrust into Charless face a red tongue began licking him and at the same moment Charlotte screaming There he is raced headlong across the swarths of hay to meet Guy who had just ridden into the field He threw Deloraines rein to one of the haymakers and came bounding to meet her just in time to pick her up as she put her foot into a hidden hole and fell prostrate
In another moment he was in the midst of the whole party who crowded round and welcomed him as if he had been a boy returning from his first halfyears schooling and never did little schoolboy look more holidaylike than he with all the sunshine of that June day reflected as it were in his glittering eyes and glowing face while Bustle escaping from Charless caressing arm danced round wagging his tail in ecstasy and claiming his share of the welcome Then Guy was on the ground by Charles rejoicing to find him out there and then some dropping into their former nests on the hay some standing round they talked fast and eagerly in a confusion of sound that did not subside for the first ten minutes so as to allow anything to be clearly heard The first distinct sentence was Charlottes Bustle darling old fellow you are handsomer than ever
What a delicious day next exclaimed Guy following Philips example by throwing off hat and necktie
A spontaneous tribute to the beauty of the day said Charles
Really it is so ultrasplendid as to deserve notice said Philip throwing himself completely back and looking up
One cannot help revelling in that deep blue said Laura
Tomorrowll be the happiest time of all the glad new year hummed Guy
Ah you will teach us all now said Laura after your grand singing lessons
Do you know what is in store for you Guy said Amy Oh havent you heard about Lady Kilcorans ball
You are to go Guy said Charlotte I am glad I am not I hate dancing
And I know as much about it as Bustle said Guy catching the dog by his forepaws and causing him to perform an uncouth dance
Never mind they will soon teach you said Mrs Edmonstone
Must I really go
He begins to think it serious said Charles
Is Philip going exclaimed Guy looking as if he was taken by surprise
He is going to say something about dancing being a healthful recreation for young people said Charles
Youll be disappointed said Philip It is much too hot to moralize
Apollo unbends his bow exclaimed Charles The captain yields the field
Ah Captain Morville I ought to have congratulated you said Guy I must come to Broadstone early enough to see you on parade
Come to Broadstone You arent still bound to Mr Lascelles said Charles
If he has time for me said Guy I am too far behind the rest of the world to afford to be idle this vacation
Thats right Guy exclaimed Philip sitting up and looking full of approval With so much perseverance you must get on at last How did you do in collections
Tolerably thank you
You must be able to enter into the thing now proceeded Philip What are you reading
Thucydides
Have you come to Pericles oration I must show you some notes that I have on that Dont you get into the spirit of it now
Uphill work still answered Guy disentangling some cinders from the silky curls of Bustles ear
Which do you like best—that or the ball asked Charles
The hayfield best of all said Guy releasing Bustle and blinding him with a heap of hay
Of course said Charlotte who would not like haymaking better than that stupid ball
Poor Charlotte said Mrs Edmonstone commiseration which irritated Charlotte into standing up and protesting
Mamma you know I dont want to go
No more do I Charlotte said her brother in a mock consoling tone You and I know what is good for us and despise sublunary vanities
But you will go Guy said Laura Philip is really going
In spite of Lord Kilcorans folly in going to such an expense as either taking Allonby or giving the ball said Charles
I dont think it is my business to bring Lord Kilcoran to a sense of his folly said Philip I made all my protests to Maurice when first he started the notion, but if his father chose to take the matter up it is no concern of mine
You will understand Guy said Charles that this ball is specially got up by Maurice for Lauras benefit
Believe as little as you please of that speech Guy said Laura the truth is that Lord Kilcoran is very goodnatured and Eveleen was very much shocked to hear that Amy had never been to any ball and I to only one and so it ended in their giving one
When is it to be
On Thursday week said Amy I wonder if you will think Eveleen as pretty as we do
She is Lauras great friend is not she
I like her very much I have known her all my life and she has much more depth than those would think who only know her manner And Laura looked pleadingly at Philip as she spoke
Are there any others of the family at home said Guy
The two younger girls Mabel and Helen and the little boys said Amy Lord de Courcy is in Ireland and all the others are away
Lord de Courcy is the wisest man of the family and sets his face against absenteeism said Philip so he is never visible here
But you arent going to despise it I hope Guy said Amy earnestly it will be so delightful And what fun we shall have in teaching you to dance
Guy stretched himself and gave a quaint grunt
Never mind Guy said Philip very little is required You may easily pass in the crowd I never learnt
Your ear will guide you said Laura
And no one can stay at home since Mary Ross is going said Amy Eveleen was always so fond of her that she came and forced a promise from her by telling her she should come with mamma and have no trouble
You have not seen Allonby said Laura There are such Vandykes and among them such a King Charles
Is not that the picture said Charles before which Amy—
O dont Charlie
Was found dissolved in tears
I could not help it murmured Amy blushing crimson
There is all Charless fate in his face said Philip—earnest melancholy beautiful It would stir the feelings—were it an unknown portrait No Amy you need not be ashamed of your tears
But Amy turned away doubly ashamed
I hope it is not in the ballroom said Guy
No said Laura it is in the library
Charlotte whose absence had become perceptible from the general quietness here ran up with two envelopes which she put into Guys hands One contained Lady Kilcorans genuine card of invitation for Sir Guy Morville the other Charlotte had scribbled in haste for Mr Bustle
This put an end to all rationality Guy rose with a growl and a roar and hunted her over half the field till she was caught and came back out of breath and screaming We never had such a haymaking
So I think the haymakers will say answered her mother rising to go indoors What ruin of haycocks
Oh Ill set all that to rights said Guy seizing a hayfork
Stop stop take care cried Charles I dont want to be built up in the rick and by and by when my disconsolate family have had all the ponds dragged for me Deloraine will be heard to complain that they give him very odd animal food
Who could resist such a piteous appeal said Guy helping him to rise and conducting him to his wheeled chair The others followed and when shortly after Laura looked out at her window she saw Guy with his coat off toiling like a real haymaker to build up the cocks in all their neat fairness and height whistling meantime the Queen of the May and now and then singing a line She watched the old cowman come up touching his hat and looking less cross than usual she saw Guys ready greeting and perceived they were comparing the forks and rakes the pooks and cocks of their counties and finally she beheld her father ride into the field and Guy spring to meet him
No one could have so returned to what was in effect a home unless his time had been properly spent and in fact all that Mr Edmonstone or Philip could hear of him was so satisfactory that Philip pronounced that the first stage of the trial had been passed irreproachably and Laura felt and looked delighted at this sanction to the high estimation in which she held him
His own account of himself to Mrs Edmonstone would not have been equally satisfactory if she had not had something else to check it with It was given by degrees and at many different times chiefly as they walked round the garden in the twilight of the summer evenings talking over the many subjects mentioned in the letters which had passed constantly It seemed as if there were very few to whom Guy would ever give his confidence but that once bestowed it was with hardly any reserve and that was his great relief and satisfaction to pour out his whole mind where he was sure of sympathy
To her then he confided how much provoked he was with himself his first term he said having only shown him what an intolerable fool he had to keep in order By his account he could do nothing without turning his own head except study and that stupefied it Never was there a more idle fellow he could work himself for a given time but his sense would not second him and was it not most absurd in him to take so little pleasure in what was his duty and enjoy only what was bad for him
He had tried boating but it had distracted him from his work so he had been obliged to give it up and had done so in a hasty vehement manner which had caused offence and for which he blamed himself It had been the same with other things till he had left himself no regular recreation but walking and music The last he said might engross him in the same way but he thought here he hesitated a little there were higher ends for music which made it come under Mrs Edmonstones rule of a thing to be used guardedly not disused He had resumed light reading too which he had nearly discontinued before he went to Oxford One wants something he said by way of refreshment where there is no sea nor rock to look at and no Laura and Amy to talk to
He had made one friend a scholar of his own college of the name of Wellwood This name had been his attraction Guy was bent on friendship with him if as he tried to make him out to be he was the son of that Captain Wellwood whose death had weighed so heavily on his grandfathers conscience feeling almost as if it were his duty to ask forgiveness in his grandfathers name yet scarcely knowing how to venture on advances to one to whom his name had such associations However they had gradually drawn together and at length entered on the subject and Guy then found he was the nephew not the son of Captain Wellwood indeed his former belief was founded on a miscalculation as the duel had taken place twentyeight years ago He now heard all his grandfather had wished to know of the family There were two unmarried daughters and their cousin spoke in the highest terms of their selfdevoted life promising what Guy much wished that they should hear what deep repentance had followed the crime which had made them fatherless He was to be a clergyman and Guy admired him extremely saying however that he was so shy and retiring it was hard to know him well
From not having been at school and from other causes Guy had made few acquaintance indeed he amused Mrs Edmonstone by fearing he had been morose She was ready to tell him he was an ingenious selftormentor but she saw that the struggle to do right was the main spring of the happiness that beamed round him in spite of his selfreproach heartfelt as it was She doubted whether persons more contented with themselves were as truly joyous and was convinced that while thus combating lesser temptations the very shadow of what are generally alone considered as real temptations would hardly come near him
If it had not been for these talks and now and then a thoughtful look she would have believed him one of the most lighthearted and merriest of beings He was more full of glee and high spirits than she had ever seen him he seemed to fill the whole house with mirth and keep every one alive by his fun and frolic as blithe and untiring as Maurice de Courcy himself though not so wild
Very pleasant were those summer days—reading walking music gardening Did not they all work like very labourers at the new arbour in the midst of the laurels where Charles might sit and see the spires of Broadstone Work they did indeed Charles looking on from his wheeled chair laughing to see Guy sawing as if for his living and Amy hammering gallantly and Laura weaving osiers and Charlotte flying about with messages
One day they were startled by an exclamation from Charles Ah ha Paddy is that you and beheld the tall figure of a girl advancing with a rapid springing step holding up her riding habit with one hand with the other whisking her coralhandled whip There was something distinguished in her air and her features though less fine than Lauras were very pretty by the help of laughing dark blue eyes and very black hair under her broad hat and little waving feather She threatened Charles with her whip calling out—Aunt Edmonstone said I should find you here What is the fun now
Arbour building said Charles dont you see the head carpenter
Sir Guy whispered she to Laura looking up at him where he was mounted on the roof thatching it with reed the sunshine full on his glowing face and white shirt sleeves
Here said Charles as Guy swung himself down with a bound his face much redder than sun and work had already made it heres another wild Irisher for you
Sir Guy Morville—Lady Eveleen de Courcy began Laura but Lady Eveleen cut her short frankly holding out her hand and saying You are almost a cousin you know Oh dont leave off Do give me something to do That hammer Amy pray—Laura dont you remember how dearly I always loved hammering
How did you come said Laura
With papa—tis his visit to Sir Guy No dont go as Guy began to look for his coat he is only impending He is gone on to Broadstone but he dropped me here and will pick me up on his way back Cant you give me something to do on the top of that ladder I should like it mightily it looks so cool and airy
How can you Eva whispered Laura reprovingly but Lady Eveleen only shook her head at her and declaring she saw a dangerous nail sticking out began to hammer it in with such good will that Charles stopped his ears and told her it was worse than her tongue Go on about the ball do
Oh said she earnestly do you think there is any hope of Captain Morvilles coming
Oh yes said Laura
I am so glad That is what papa is gone to Broadstone about Maurice said he had given him such a lecture that he would not be the one to think of asking him and papa must do it himself for if he sets his face against it it will spoil it all
You may make your mind easy said Charles the captain is lenient and looks on the ball as a mere development of Irish nature He has been consoling Guy on the difficulties of dancing
Cant you dance said Lady Eveleen looking at him with compassion
Such is my melancholy ignorance said Guy
We have been talking of teaching him said Laura
Talk will that do it cried Lady Eveleen springing up We will begin this moment Come out on the lawn Here Charles wheeling him along No thank you I like it as Guy was going to help her There Charles be fiddler go on tumtum tee thatll do Amy Laura be ladies Im the other gentleman and she stuck on her hat in military style giving it a cock She actually set them quadrilling in spite of adverse circumstances dancing better in her habit than most people without one till Lord Kilcoran arrived
While he was making his visit she walked a little apart arminarm with Laura I like him very much she said he looks up to anything I had heard so much of his steadiness that it is a great relief to my mind to see him so unlike his cousin
Eveleen
No disparagement to the captain only I am so dreadfully afraid of him I am sure he thinks me such an unmitigated goose Now doesnt he
If you would but take the right way to make him think otherwise dear Eva and show the sense you really have
That is just what my fear of him wont let me do I would not for the world let him guess it so there is nothing for it but sauciness to cover ones weakness I cant be sensible with those that wont give me credit for it But youll mind and teach Sir Guy to dance he has so much spring in him he deserves to be an Irishman
In compliance with this injunction there used to be a clearance every evening Charles turned into the bay window out of the way Mrs Edmonstone at the piano and the rest figuring away the partnerless one called puss in the corner being generally Amabel while Charlotte disdaining them all the time used to try to make them imitate her dancingmasters graces causing her father to perform such caricatures of them as to overpower all with laughing
Mr Edmonstone was half Irish His mother Lady Mabel Edmonstone had never thoroughly taken root in England and on his marriage had gone with her daughter to live near her old home in Ireland The present Earl of Kilcoran was her nephew and a very close intercourse had always been kept up between the families Mr and Mrs Edmonstone being adopted by their younger cousins as uncle and aunt and always so called
The house at Allonby was in such confusion that the family there expected to dine nowhere on the day of the ball and the Hollywell party thought it prudent to secure their dinner at home with Philip and Mary Ross who were to go with them
By special desire Philip wore his uniform and while the sisters were dressing Charlotte gave him a thorough examination which led to a talk between him and Mary on accoutrements and weapons in general but while deep in some points of chivalrous armour Marys waist was pinched by two mischievous hands and a little fluttering white figure danced around her
O Amy what do you want with me
Come and be trimmed up said Amy
I thought you told me I was to have no trouble I am dressed said Mary looking complacently at her full folds of white muslin
No more you shall but you promised to do as you were told And Amy fluttered away with her
Do you remember said Philip the comparison of Rose Flammock dragging off her father to a little carved cherub trying to uplift a solid monumental hero
O I must tell Mary cried Charlotte but Philip stopped her with orders not to be a silly child
It is a pity Amy should not have her share said Charles
The comparison to a Dutch cherub asked Guy
She is more after the pattern of the little things on little wings in your blottingbook said Charles certain lines in the predicament of the cherubs of painters—heads et proeterea nihil
O Guy do you write verses cried Charlotte
Some nonsense muttered Guy out of countenance I thought I had made away with that rubbish where is it
In the blottingbook in my room said Charles I must explain that the book is my property and was put into your room when mamma was beautifying it for you as new and strange company On its return to me at your departure I discovered a great accession of blots and sailing vessels beside the aforesaid little things
I shall resume my own property said Guy departing in haste
Charlotte ran after him to beg for a sight of it and Philip asked Charles what it was like
A romantic incident said Charles just fit for a novel A Petrarch leaving his poems about in blottingbooks
Charles used the word Petrarch to stand for a poet not thinking what ladys name he suggested and he was surprised at the severity of Philips tone as he inquired Do you mean anything or do you not
Perceiving with delight that he had perplexed and teased he rejoiced in keeping up the mystery
Eh is it a tender subject with you too
Philip rose and standing over him said in a low but impressive tone
I cannot tell whether you are trifling or not but you are no boy now and can surely see that this is no subject to be played with If you are concealing anything you have discovered you have a great deal to answer for I can hardly imagine anything more unfortunate than that he should become attached to either of your sisters
Et pourquoi asked Charles coolly
I see said Philip retreating to his chair and speaking with great composure I did you injustice by speaking seriously Then as his uncle came into the room he asked some indifferent question without betraying a shade of annoyance
Charles meanwhile congratulated himself on his valour in keeping his counsel in spite of so tall a man in scarlet but he was much nettled at the last speech for if a real attachment to his sister had been in question he would never have trifled about it Keenly alive to his cousins injustice he rejoiced in having provoked and mystified the impassable though he little knew the storm he had raised beneath that serene exterior of perfect selfcommand
The carriages were announced and Mr Edmonstone began to call the ladies adding tenfold to the confusion in the dressingroom There was Laura being completed by the ladys maid Amabel embellishing Mary Mrs Edmonstone with her arm loaded with shawls Charlotte flourishing about Poor Mary—it was much against her will—but she had no heart to refuse the wreath of geraniums that Amys own hands had woven for her and there she sat passive as a doll though in despair at their all waiting for her For Lauras toilette was finished and every one began dressing her at once while Charlotte to make it better screamed over the balusters that all were ready but Mary Sir Guy was heard playing the Harmonious Blacksmith and Captain Morvilles step was heard fast and firm At last when a long chain was put round her neck she cried out I have submitted to everything so far I can bear no more jumped up caught hold of her shawl and was putting it on when there was a general outcry that they must exhibit themselves to Charles
They all ran down and Amy flying up to her brother made a splendid sweeping curtsey and twirled round in a pirouette
Got up regardless of expense cried Charles display yourselves
The young ladies ranged themselves in imitation of the book of fashions The sisters were in white with wreaths of starry jessamine It was particularly becoming to Lauras belladonna lily complexion rich brown curls and classical features and her brother exclaimed
Laura is exactly like Apollo playing the lyre outside mammas old manuscript book of music
Has not Amy made beautiful wreaths said Laura She stripped the tree and Guy had to fetch the ladder to gather the sprays on the top of the wall
Do you see your bit of myrtle Guy said Amy pointing to it on Lauras head that you tried to persuade me would pass for jessamine
Ah it should have been all myrtle said Guy
Philip leant meantime against the door Laura only once glanced towards him thinking all this too trifling for him and never imagining the intense interest with which he gave a meaning to each word and look
Well done Mary cried Charles they have furbished you up handsomely
Mary made a face and said she should wonder who was the fashionable young lady she should meet in the pierglasses at Allonby Then Mr Edmonstone hurried them away and they arrived in due time
The saloon at Allonby was a beautiful room one end opening into a conservatory full of coloured lamps fresh green leaves and hothouse plants There they found as yet only the home party the goodnatured merry Lord Kilcoran his quiet English wife who had bad health and looked hardly equal to the confusion of the evening Maurice and two younger boys Eveleen and her two little sisters Mabel and Helen
This makes it hard on Charlotte thought Amy while the two girls dragged her off to show her the lamps in the conservatory and the rest attacked Mrs Edmonstone for not having brought Charlotte reproaching her with hardness of heart of which they had never believed her capable—Lady Eveleen in especial talking with that exaggeration of her ordinary manner which her dread of Captain Morville made her assume Little he recked of her he was absorbed in observing how far Lauras conduct coincided with Charless hints On the first opportunity he asked her to dance and was satisfied with her pleased acquiescence but the next moment Guy came up and in an eager manner made the same request
I am engaged said she with a bright proud glance at Philip and Guy pursued Amabel into the conservatory where he met with better success Mr Edmonstone gallantly asked Mary if he was too old a partner and was soon dancing with the step and spring that had once made him the best dancer in the county
Mrs Edmonstone watched her flock proud and pleased thinking how well they looked and that in especial she had never been sensible how much Lauras and Philips good looks excelled the rest of the world They were much alike in the remarkable symmetry both of figure and feature the colour of the deep blue eye and fairness of complexion
It is curious thought Mrs Edmonstone that so very handsome as Philip is it is never the first thing remarked about him just as his height never is observed till he is compared with other people The fact is that his superior sense carries off a degree of beauty which would be a misfortune to most men It is that sedate expression and distinguished air that make the impression How happy Laura looks how gracefully she moves No it is not being foolish to think no one equal to Laura My other pair and she smiled much more you happy young things I would not wish to see anything pleasanter than your merry faces Little Amy looks almost as pretty as Laura now she is lighted up by blush and smile and her dancing is very nice it is just like her laughing so quiet and yet so full of glee I dont think she is less graceful than her sister but the complete enjoyment strikes one more And as to enjoyment—there are those bright eyes of her partners perfectly sparkling with delight he looks as if it was a world of enchantment to him Never had any one a greater capacity for happiness than Guy
Mrs Edmonstone might well retain her opinion when after the quadrille Guy came to tell her that he had never seen anything so delightful and he entertained Mary Ross with his fresh joyous pleasure through the next dance
Laura whispered Eveleen Ive one ambition Do you guess it Dont tell him but if he would I should have a better opinion of myself ever after Im afraid hell depreciate me to his friend and really with Mr Thorndale I was no more foolish than a ball requires
Lady Eveleen hoped in vain Captain Morville danced with little Lady Helen a child of eleven who was enchanted at having so tall a partner then after standing still for some time chose his cousin Amabel
You are a good partner and neighbour said he giving her his arm you dont want young lady talk
Should you not have asked Mary She has been sitting down this long time
Do you think she cares for such a sport as dancing
Amy made no answer
You have been well off You were dancing with Thorndale just now
Yes It was refreshing to have an old acquaintance among so many strangers And he is so delighted with Eveleen but what is more Philip that Mr Vernon who is dancing with Laura told Maurice he thought her the prettiest and most elegant person here
Laura might have higher praise said Philip for hers is beauty of countenance even more than of feature If only—
If said Amy
Look round Amy and you will see many a face which speaks of intellect wasted or if cultivated turned aside from its true purpose like the double blossom which bears leaves alone
Ah you forget you are talking to silly little Amy I cant see all that I had rather think people as happy and good as they look
Keep your childlike temper as long as you can—all your life perhaps for this is one of the points where it is folly to be wise
Then you only meant things in general Nothing about Laura
Things in general repeated Philip bright promises blighted or thrown away—
But he spoke absently and his eye was following Laura Amy thought he was thinking of his sister and was sorry for him He spoke no more but she did not regret it for she could not moralize in such a scene and the sight and the dancing were pleasure enough
Guy in the meantime had met an Oxford acquaintance who introduced him to his sisters—pretty girls—whose father Mr Edmonstone knew but who was rather out of the Hollywell visiting distance They fell into conversation quickly and the Miss Alstons asked him with some interest Which was the pretty Miss Edmonstone Guy looked for the sisters as if to make up his mind for the fact was that when he first knew Laura and Amy the idea of criticising beauty had not entered his mind and to compare them was quite a new notion Nay said he at last if you cannot discover for yourselves when they are both before your eyes I will do nothing so invidious as to say which is the pretty one Ill tell which is the eldest and which the youngest but the rest you must decide for yourself
I should like to know them said Miss Alston Oh they are both very nicelooking girls
There that is Laura—Miss Edmonstone said Guy that tall young lady with the beautiful hair and jessamine wreath
He spoke as if he was proud of her and had a property in her The tone did not escape Philip who at that moment was close to them with Amy on his arm and knowing the Alstons slightly stopped and spoke and introduced his cousin Miss Amabel Edmonstone At the same time Guy took one of the Miss Alstons away to get some tea
So you knew my cousin at Oxford said Philip to the brother
Yes slightly What an amusing fellow he is
There is something very bright very unlike other people about him said Miss Alston
How does he get on Is he liked
Why yes I should say so on the whole but it is rather as my sister says he is not like other people
In what respect
Oh I can hardly tell He is a very pleasant person but he ought to have been at school He is a man of crotchets
Hardworking
Very he makes everything give way to that He is a capital companion when he is to be had but he lives very much to himself He is a man of one friend and I dont see much of him
Another dance began Mr Alston went to look for his partner Philip and Amy moved on in search of ice Hum said Philip to himself causing Amy to gaze up at him but he was musing too intently for her to venture on a remark She was thinking that she did not wonder that strangers deemed Guy crotchety since he was so difficult to understand and then she considered whether to take him to see King Charles in the library and concluded that she would wait for she felt as if the martyr kings face would look on her too gravely to suit her present tone
Philip helped her to ice and brought her back to her mothers neighbourhood without many more words He then stood thoughtful for some time entered into conversation with one of the elder gentlemen and when that was interrupted turned to talk to his aunt
Lady Eveleen and her two cousins were for a moment together What is the matter Eva said Amy seeing a sort of dissatisfaction on her bright face
The rocs egg said Laura smiling The queen of the evening cant be content—
No you are the queen if the one thing can make you so—the one thing wanting to me
How absurd you are Eva—when you say you are so afraid of him too
That is the very reason I should get a better opinion of myself Besides there is nobody else so handsome I declare Ill make a bold attempt
Oh you dont think of such a thing cried Laura very much shocked
Never fear said Eveleen faint heart you know And with a nod a flourish of her bouquet and an arch smile at her cousins horror she moved on and presently they heard her exclaiming gaily Captain Morville I really must scold you You are setting a shocking example of laziness Aunt Edmonstone how can you encourage such proceedings Indolence is the parent of vice you know
Philip smiled just as much as the occasion required and answered I beg your pardon I had forgotten my duty Ill attend to my business better in future And turning to a small shy damsel who seldom met with a partner he asked her to dance Eveleen came back to Laura with a droll disappointed gesture Insult to injury said she disconsolately
Of course said Amy he could not have thought you wanted to dance with him or you would not have gone to stir him up
Well then he was very obtuse
Besides you are engaged
O yes to Mr Thorndale But who would be content with the squire when the knight disdains her
Mr Thorndale came to claim Eveleen at that moment It was the second time she had danced with him and it did not pass unobserved by Philip nor the long walk up and down after the dance was over At length his friend came up to him and said something warm in admiration of her She is very Irish was Philips answer with a cold smile and Mr Thorndale stood uncomfortable under the disapprobation attracted by Eveleens beauty and grace yet so unused to trust his own judgment apart from Morvilles as to be in an instant doubtful whether he really admired or not
You have not been dancing with her he said presently
No she attracts too many to need the attention of a nobody like myself
That too many seeming to confound him with the vulgar herd made Mr Thorndale heartily ashamed of having been pleased with her
Philip was easy about him for the present satisfied that admiration had been checked which if it had been allowed to grow into an attachment would have been very undesirable
The suspicions Charles had excited were so full in Philips mind however that he could not as easily set it at rest respecting his cousin Guy had three times asked her to dance but each time she had been engaged At last just as the clock struck the hour at which the carriage had been ordered he came up and impetuously claimed her One quadrille we must have Laura if you are not tired
No Oh no I could dance till this time tomorrow
We ought to be going said Mrs Edmonstone
O pray Mrs Edmonstone this one more cried Guy eagerly Laura owes me this one
Yes this one more mamma said Laura and they went off together while Philip remained in a reverie till requested by his aunt to see if the carriage was ready
The dance was over the carriage was waiting but Guy and Laura did not appear till after two or three minutes spent in wonder and inquiries they came quietly walking back from the library where they had been looking at King Charles
All the way home the four ladies in the carriage never ceased laughing and talking The three gentlemen in theirs acted diversely Mr Edmonstone went to sleep Philip sat in silent thought Guy whistled and hummed the tunes and moved his foot very much as if he was still dancing
They met for a moment and parted again in the hall at Hollywell where the daylight was striving to get in through the closed shutters Philip went on to Broadstone Guy said he could not go to bed by daylight called Bustle and went to the river to bathe and the rest crept upstairs to their rooms And so ended Lord Kilcorans ball
CHAPTER 8
Like Alexander I will reign
And I will reign alone
My thoughts shall ever more disdain
A rival near my throne
But I must rule and govern still
And always give the law
And have each subject at my will
And all to stand in awe
—MONTROSE
One very hot afternoon shortly after the ball Captain Morville walked to Hollywell accelerating his pace under the influence of anxious reflections
He could not determine whether Charles had spoken in jest but in spite of Guys extreme youth he feared there was ground for the suspicion excited by the hint and was persuaded that such an attachment could produce nothing but unhappiness to his cousin considering how little confidence could be placed in Guy He perceived that there was much to inspire affection—attractive qualities amiable disposition the talent for music and now this recently discovered power of versifying all were in Guys favour besides the ancient name and long ancestry which conferred a romantic interest and caused even Philip to look up to him with a feudal feeling as head of the family There was also the familiar intercourse to increase the danger and Philip as he reflected on these things trembled for Laura and felt himself her only protector for his uncle was nobody Mrs Edmonstone was infatuated and Charles would not listen to reason To make everything worse he had that morning heard that there was to be a grand inspection of the regiment and a presentation of colours Colonel Deane was very anxious and it was plain that in the interval the officers would be allowed little leisure The whole affair was to end with a ball which would lead to a repetition of what had already disturbed him
Thus meditating Philip heated and dusty walked into the smooth green enclosure of Hollywell Everything save the dancing clouds of insect youth which whirled in his face was drooping in the heat The house—every door and window opened—seemed gasping for breath the cows sought refuge in the shade the pony drooped its head drowsily the leaves hung wearily the flowers were faint and thirsty and Bustle was stretched on the stone steps mouth open tongue out only his tail now and then moving till he put back his ears and crested his head to greet the arrival Philip heard the sounds that had caused the motion of the sympathizing tail—the rich tones of Guys voice Stepping over the dog he entered and heard more clearly—
Two loving hearts may sever
For sorrow fails them never
And then another voice—
Who knows not love in sorrows night
He knows not love in light
In the drawingroom cool and comfortable in the green shade of the Venetian blinds of the bay window stood Laura leaning on the piano close to Guy who sat on the musicstool looking thoroughly at home in his brown shootingcoat and looselytied handkerchief
Any one but Philip would have been out of temper but he shook hands as cordially as usual and would not even be the first to remark on the heat
Laura told him he looked hot and tired and invited him to come out to the others and cool himself on the lawn She went for her parasol Guy ran for her camp stool and Philip going to the piano read what they had been singing The lines were in Lauras writing corrected here and there in Guys hand
BE STEADFAST
Two loving hearts may sever
Yet love shall fail them never
Love brightest beams in sorrows night
Love is of life the light
Two loving hearts may sever
Yet hope shall fail them never
Hope is a star in sorrows night
Forgetmenot of light
Two loving hearts may sever
Yet faith may fail them never
Trust on through sorrows night
Faith is of love and hope the light
Two loving hearts may sever
For sorrow fails them never
Who knows not love in sorrows night
He knows not love in light
Philip was by no means pleased However it was in anything but a sentimental manner that Guy looking over him said For sever read be separated but a wouldnt rhyme
I translated it into prose and Guy made it verse said Laura I hope you approve of our performance
It is that thing of Helmine von Chezy Beharre is it not said Philip particularly civil because he was so much annoyed You have rendered the spirit very well but you have sacrificed a good deal to your double rhymes
Yes those last lines are not troubled with any equality of feet said Guy but the repetition is half the beauty It put me in mind of those lines of Burns—
Had we never loved so kindly
Had we never loved so blindly
Never met and never parted
We had neer been broken hearted
but there is a trust in these that is more touching than that despair
Yes the despair is ready to wish the love had never been said Laura It does not see the star of trust Why did you use that word trust only once Guy
I did not want to lose the three—faith hope love—faith keeping the other two alive
My doubt was whether it was right to have that analogy
Surely said Guy eagerly that analogy must be the best part of earthly love
Here Charlotte came to see if Guy and Laura meant to sing all the afternoon and they went out They found the others in the arbour and Charlottes histories of its construction gave Philip little satisfaction They next proceeded to talk over the ball
Ah said Philip balls are the fashion just now What do you say Amy he was more inclined to patronize her than any one else to the gaieties we are going to provide for you
You Are you going to have your new colours Oh you are not going to give us a ball
Well that is fun cried Guy What glory Maurice de Courcy must be in
He is gone to Allonby said Philip to announce it saying he must persuade his father to put off their going to Brighton Do you think he will succeed
Hardly said Laura poor Lady Kilcoran was so knocked up by their ball that she is the more in want of sea air Oh mamma Eva must come and stay here
That she must said Mrs Edmonstone that will make it easy She is the only one who will care about the ball
Philip was obliged to conceal his vexation and to answer the many eager questions about the arrangements He stayed to dinner and as the others went indoors to dress he lingered near Charlotte assuming with some difficulty an air of indifference and said—Well Charlotte did you tease Guy into showing you those verses
Oh yes said Charlotte with what the French call un air capable
Well what were they
That I mustnt tell They were very pretty but Ive promised
Promised what
Never to say anything about them He made it a condition with me and I assure you I am to be trusted
Right said Philip Ill ask no more
It would be of no use said Charlotte shaking her head as if she wished he would prove her further
Philip was in hopes of being able to speak to Laura after dinner but his uncle wanted him to come and look over the plans of an estate adjoining Redclyffe which there was some idea of purchasing Such an employment would in general have been congenial but on this occasion it was only by a strong force that he could chain his attention for Guy was pacing the terrace with Laura and Amabel and as they passed and repassed the window he now and then caught sounds of repeating poetry
In this Guy excelled He did not read aloud well he was too rapid and eyes and thoughts were apt to travel still faster than the lips thus producing a confusion but no one could recite better when a passage had taken strong hold of his imagination and he gave it the full effect of the modulations of his fine voice conveying in its inflections the impressions which stirred him profoundly He was just now enchanted with his first reading of Thalaba where he found all manner of deep meanings to which the sisters listened with wonder and delight He repeated in a low awful thrilling tone that made Amy shudder the lines in the seventh book ending with—
Who comes from the bridal chamber
It is Azrael angel of death
You have not been so taken up with any book since Sintram said Laura
It is like Sintram he replied
Like it
So it seems to me A strife with the powers of darkness the victory forgiveness resignation death
Thou knowst the secret wishes of my heart
Do with me as thou wilt thy will is best
I wish you would not speak as if you were Thalaba yourself said Amy you bring the whole Domdaniel round us
I am afraid he is going to believe himself Thalaba as well as Sintram said Laura But you know Southey did not see all this himself and did not understand it when it was pointed out
Dont tell us that said Amy
Nay I think there is something striking in it said Guy then with a sudden transition but is not this ball famous
And their talk was of balls and reviews till nine oclock when they were summoned to tea
On the whole Philip returned to Broadstone by no means comforted
Never had he known so much difficulty in attending with patience to his duties as in the course of the next fortnight They became a greater durance as he at length looked his feelings full in the face and became aware of their true nature
He perceived that the loss of Laura would darken his whole existence yet he thought that were he only secure of her happiness he could have resigned her in silence Guy was however one of the last men in the world whom he could bear to see in possession of her and probably she was allowing herself to be entangled if not in heart at least in manner If so she should not be unwarned He had been her guide from childhood and he would not fail her now
Three days before the review he succeeded in finding time for a walk to Hollywell not fully decided on the part he should act though resolved on making some remonstrance He was crossing a stile about a mile and a half from Hollywell when he saw a lady sitting on the stump of a tree sketching and found that fate had been so propitious as to send Laura thither alone The rest had gone to gather mushrooms on a down and had left her sketching the view of the spires of Broadstone in the cleft between the high green hills She was very glad to see him and held up her purple and olive washes to be criticised but he did not pay much attention to them He was almost confused at the sudden manner in which the opportunity for speaking had presented itself.
It is a long time since I have seen you said he at last
An unheardof time
Still longer since we have had any conversation
I was just thinking so Not since that hot haymaking when Guy came home Indeed we have had so much amusement lately that I have hardly had time for thought Guy says we are all growing dissipated
Ah your German and dancing and music do not agree with thought
Poor music said Laura smiling But I am ready for a lecture I have been feeling more like a butterfly than I like
I know you think me unjust about music and I freely confess that I cannot estimate the pleasure it affords but I doubt whether it is a safe pleasure It forms common ground for persons who would otherwise have little in common and leads to intimacies which occasion results never looked for
Yes said Laura receiving it as a general maxim
Laura you complain of feeling like a butterfly Is not that a sign that you were made for better things
But what can I do I try to read early and at night but I cant prevent the fun and gaiety and indeed I dont think I would It is innocent and we never had such a pleasant summer Charlie is so—so much more equable and mamma is more easy about him and I cant help thinking it does them all good though I do feel idle
It is innocent it is right for a little while said Philip but your dissatisfaction proves that you are superior to such things Laura what I fear is that this summer holiday may entangle you and so fix your fate as to render your life no holiday O Laura take care know what you are doing
What am I doing asked Laura with an alarmed look of ingenuous surprise
Never had it been so hard to maintain his composure as now when her simplicity forced him to come to plainer terms I must speak he continued because no one else will Have you reflected whither this may tend This music this versifying this admitting a stranger so unreservedly into your pursuits
She understood now and hung her head He would have given worlds to judge of the face hidden by her bonnet but as she did not reply he spoke on his agitation becoming so strong that the struggle was perceptible in the forced calmness of his tone I would not say a word if he were worthy but Laura—Laura I have seen Locksley Hall acted once do not let me see it again in a way which—which would give me infinitely more pain
The faltering of his voice so resolutely subdued touched her extremely and a thrill of exquisite pleasure glanced through her on hearing confirmed what she had long felt that she had taken Margarets place—nay as she now learnt that she was even more precious to him She only thought of reassuring him
No you need never fear that He has no such thought I am sure She blushed deeply but looked in his face He treats us both alike besides he is so young
The mischief is not done said Philip trying to resume his usual tone I only meant to speak in time You might let your manner go too far you might even allow your affections to be involved without knowing it if you were not on your guard
Never said Laura Oh no I could never dream of that with Guy I like Guy very much I think better of him than you do but oh no he could never be my first and best I could never care for him in that way How could you think so Philip
Laura I cannot but look on you with what may seem oversolicitude Since I lost Fanny and worse than lost Margaret you have been my home my first my most precious interest O Laura and he did not even attempt to conceal the trembling and tenderness of his voice could I bear to lose you to see you thrown away or changed—you dearest best of all
Laura did not turn away her head this time but raising her beautiful face glowing with such a look as had never beamed there before while tears rose to her eyes she said Dont speak of my changing towards you I never could for if there is anything to care for in me it is you that have taught it to me
If ever face plainly told another that he was her first and best Lauras did so now Away went misgivings and he looked at her in happiness too great for speech at least he could not speak till he had mastered his emotion but his countenance was sufficient reply Even then in the midst of this flood of ecstasy came the thought What have I done
He had gone further than he had ever intended It was a positive avowal of love and what would ensue Cessation of intercourse with her endless vexations the displeasure of her family loss of influence contempt and from Mr Edmonstone for the pretensions of a penniless soldier His joy was too great to be damped but it was rendered cautious Laura my own what delight the words gave her you have made me very happy We know each other now and trust each other for ever
O yes yes nothing can alter what has grown up with us
It is for ever repeated Philip But Laura let us be content with our own knowledge of what we are to each other Do not let us call in others to see our happiness
Laura looked surprised for she always considered any communication about his private feelings too sacred to be repeated and wondered he should think the injunction necessary I never can bear to talk about the best kinds of happiness said she but oh and she sprang up here they come
Poor Mrs Edmonstone as she walked back from her mushroomfield she little guessed that words had been spoken which would give the colouring to her daughters whole life—she little guessed that her muchloved and esteemed nephew had betrayed her confidence As she and the girls came up Philip advanced to meet them that Laura might have a few moments to recover while with an effort he kept himself from appearing absent in the conversation that ensued It was brief for having answered some questions with regard to the doings on the important day he said that since he had met them he would not come on to Hollywell and bade them farewell giving Laura a pressure of the hand which renewed the glow on her face
He walked back trying to look through the dazzling haze of joy so as to see his situation clearly It was impossible for him not to perceive that there had been an absolute declaration of affection and that he had established a private understanding with his cousin It was not however an engagement nor did he at present desire to make it so It was impossible for him as yet to marry and he was content to wait without a promise since that could not add to his entire reliance on Laura He could not bear to be rejected by her parents he knew his poverty would be the sole ground of objection and he was not asking her to share it He believed sincerely that a long lingering attachment to himself would be more for her good than a marriage with one who would have been a high prize for worldly aims and was satisfied that by winning her heart he had taken the only sure means of securing her from becoming attached to Guy while secrecy was the only way of preserving his intercourse with her on the same footing and exerting his influence over the family
It was calmly reflected for Philips love was tranquil though deep and steady and the rather sought to preserve Laura as she was than to make her anything more and this very calmness contributed to his selfdeception on this first occasion that he had ever actually swerved from the path of right
With an uncomfortable sensation he met Guy riding home from his tutor entirely unsuspicious He stopped and talked of the preparations at Broadstone where he had been over the ground with Maurice de Courcy and had heard the band
What did you think of it said Philip absently
They should keep better time Really Philip there is one fellow with a bugle that ought to be flogged every day of his life said Guy making a droll excruciated face
How a few words can change the whole current of ideas. The band was connected with Philip therefore he could not bear to hear it found fault with and adduced some ones opinion that the man in question was one of the best of their musicians
Guy could not help shrugging his shoulders as he laughed and said—Then I shall be obliged to take to my heels if I meet the rest Goodbye
How conceited they have made that boy about his fine ear thought Philip I wonder he is not ashamed to parade his music considering whence it is derived
CHAPTER 9
Ah county Guy the hour is nigh
The sun has left the lea
The orange flower perfumes the bower
The breeze is on the sea
The lark his lay who thrilled all day
Sits hushed his partner nigh
Breeze bird and flower confess the hour
But where is county Guy
—SCOTT
How was it meantime with Laura The others were laughing and talking round her but all seemed lost in the transcendent beam that had shone out on her To be told by Philip that she was all to him that he had always been to her This one idea pervaded her—too glorious too happy for utterance almost for distinct thought The softening of his voice and the look with which he had regarded her recurred again and again startling her with a sudden surprise of joy almost as at the first moment Of the future Laura thought not Never had a promise of love been made with less knowledge of what it amounted to it seemed merely an expression of sentiments that she had never been without for had she not always looked up to Philip more than any other living creature and gloried in being his favourite cousin Ever since the time when he explained to her the plates in the Encyclopaedia and made her read Joyces Scientific Dialogues when Amy took fright at the first page That this might lead further did not occur to her she was eighteen she had no experience not even in novels she did not know what she had done and above all she had so leant to surrender her opinions to Philip and to believe him always right that she would never have dreamt of questioning wherever he might choose to lead her Even the caution of secrecy did not alarm her though she wondered that he thought it required safe as his confidence always was with her Mrs Edmonstone had been so much occupied by Charless illness as to have been unable to attend to her daughters in their girlish days and in the governesss time the habit had been disused of flying at once to her with every joy or grief Lauras thoughts were not easy of access and Philip had long been all in all to her She was too ignorant of life to perceive that it was her duty to make this conversation known or more truly she did not awaken her mind to consider that anything could be wrong that Philip desired
On coming home she ran up to her own room and sitting by the open window gave herself up to that delicious dream of newfound joy
There she still sat when Amy came in opening the door softly and treading lightly and airily as she entered bringing two or three roses of different tints
Laura not begun to dress
Is it time
Shall I answer you according to what Philip calls my note of time and tell you the pimpernels are closed and the tigridias dropping their leaves It would be a proper answer for you you look as if you were in Fairy Land
Is papa come home
Long ago and Guy too Why where could you have been not to have heard Guy and Eveleen singing the Irish melodies
In a trance said Laura starting up and laughing with a slight degree of constraint which caused Amy who was helping her to dress to exclaim Has anything happened Laura
What should have happened
I cant guess unless the fairies in the great ring on Ashendown came to visit you when we were gone But seriously dear Laura are you sure you are not tired Is nothing the matter
Nothing at all thank you I was only thinking over the talk I had with Philip
Oh
Amy never thought of entering into Philips talks with Laura and was perfectly satisfied
By this time Laura was herself again come back to common life and resolved to watch over her intercourse with Guy since though she was convinced that all was safe at present she had Philips word for it that there might be danger in continuing the pleasant freedom of their behaviour
Nothing could be more reassuring than Guys demeanour His head seemed entirely full of the Thursday and of a plan of his own for enabling Charles to go to the review It had darted into his head while he was going over the ground with Maurice It was so long since Charles had thought it possible to attempt any amusement away from home and former experiments had been so unsuccessful that it had never even occurred to him to think of it but he caught at the idea with great delight and eagerness Mrs Edmonstone seemed not to know what to say she had much rather that it had not been proposed yet it was very kind of Guy and Charles was so anxious about it that she knew not how to oppose him
She could not bear to have Charles in a crowd helpless as he was and she had an unpleasing remembrance of the last occasion when they had taken him to a flowershow where they had lost first Mr Edmonstone next the carriage and lastly Amy and Charlotte—all had been frightened and Charles laid up for three days from the fatigue
Answers however met each objection Charles was much stronger Guys arm would be ready for him Guy would find the carriage Philip would be there to help besides Maurice and whenever Charles was tired Guy would take him home at once without spoiling any ones pleasure
Except your own said Mrs Edmonstone
Thank you but this would be so delightful
Ah said Charles it would be as great a triumph as the dogs that caught the hare with the clog round his neck—the dogs I mean
If you will but trust me with him said Guy turning on her all the pleading eloquence of his eyes you know he can get in and out of the ponycarriage quite easily
As well as walk across the room said Charles
I would drive him in it and tell William to ride in and be at hand to hold the pony or take it out and the tent is so near that you could get to the breakfast unless the review had been enough for you I paced the distance to make sure and it is no further than from the gardendoor to the cherrytree
That is nothing said Charles
And William shall be in waiting to bring the pony the instant you are ready and we can go home independently of every one else
I thought interposed Mrs Edmonstone that you were to go to the messdinner—what is to become of that
O said Charles that will be simply a bore and he may rejoice to be excused from going the whole hog
To be sure I had rather dine in peace at home
Mrs Edmonstone was not happy but she had great confidence in Guy and her only real scruple was that she did not think it fair to occupy him entirely with attendance on her son She referred it to papa which as every one knew was the same as yielding the point and consoled herself by the certainty that to prevent it would be a great disappointment to both the youths Laura was convinced that to achieve the adventure of Charles at the review was at present at least a matter of far more prominence with Guy than anything relating to herself
All but Laura and her mother were wild about the weather especially on Wednesday when there was an attempt at a thunder storm Nothing was studied but the sky and the conversation consisted of prognostications reports of rises and falls of the glass of the way weathercocks were turning or about to turn of swallows flying high or low red sunsets and halos round the moon until at last Guy bursting into a merry laugh begged Mrs Edmonstones pardon for being such a nuisance and made a vow and kept it that be the weather what it might he would say not another word about it that evening it deserved to be neglected for he had not been able to settle to anything all day
He might have said for many days before for since the last ball and still more since Lady Eveleen had been at Hollywell it had been one round of merriment and amusement Scrambling walks teadrinkings out of doors dances among themselves or with the addition of the Harpers were the order of the day Amy Eveleen and Guy could hardly come into the room without dancing and the piano was said to acknowledge nothing but waltzes polkas and now and then an Irish jig for the special benefit of Mr Edmonstones ears The morning was almost as much spent in mirth as the afternoon for the dawdlings after breakfast and before luncheon had a great tendency to spread out and meet there was new music and singing to be practised or preparations made for evenings diversion or councils to be held which Lauras absence could not break up though it often made Amy feel how much less idle and frivolous Laura was than herself Eveleen said the same but she was visiting and it was a time to be idle and Mr Lascelles seemed to be of the same opinion with regard to his pupil for when Guy was vexed at not having done as much work as usual he only laughed at him for expecting to be able to go to balls and spend a summer of gaiety while he studied as much as at Oxford
Thursday morning was all that heart could wish the air cooled by the thunder and the clouds looking as if raining was foreign to their nature Mr and Mrs Edmonstone their daughters and Lady Eveleen were packed inside and outside the great carriage while Guy carefully settling Charles in the low phaeton putting in all that any one recommended from an aircushion to an umbrella flourished his whip and drove off with an air of exultation and delight
Everything went off to admiration No one was more amused than Charles The scene was so perfectly new and delightful to one accustomed to such a monotonous life that the very sight of people was a novelty Nowhere was there so much laughing and talking as in that little carriage and whenever Mrs Edmonstones anxious eye fell upon it she always saw Charles sitting upright with a face so full of eager interest as to banish all thought of fatigue Happy indeed he was He enjoyed the surprise of his acquaintance at meeting him he enjoyed Dr Mayernes laugh and congratulation he enjoyed seeing how foolish Philip thought him nodding to his mother and sisters laughing at the dreadful faces Guy could not help making at any particularly discordant note of the offensive bugle and his capabilities rising with his spirits he did all that the others did walked further than he had done for years was lifted up steps without knowing how sat out the whole breakfast talked to all the world and well earned the being thoroughly tired as he certainly was when Guy put him into the carriage and drove him home and still more so when Guy all but carried him up stairs and laid him on the sofa in the dressingroom
However his mother announced that it would have been so unnatural if he had not been fatigued that she should have been more anxious and leaving him to repose they all except Mr Edmonstone who had stayed to dine at the mess sat down to dinner
Amy came down dressed just as the carriage had been announced and found Laura and Eveleen standing by the table arranging their bouquets while Guy in the dark behind the piano was playing—not as usual in such cases the Harmonious Blacksmith but a chant
Is mamma ready asked Laura
Nearly said Amy but I wish she was not obliged to go I am sure she cannot bear to leave Charlie
I hope she is not going on my account said Eveleen
No said Laura we must go it would so frighten papa if we did not come Besides there is nothing to be uneasy about with Charles
O no said Amy she says so only she is always anxious and she is afraid he is too restless to go to sleep
We must get home as fast as we can if you dont mind Eva said Laura remembering how her last dance with Guy had delayed them
Can I do any good to Charlie said Guy ceasing his music I dont mean to go
Not go cried the girls in consternation
He is joking said Eveleen But I declare added she advancing towards him he is not dressed Come nonsense this is carrying it too far youll make us all too late and then Ill set Maurice at you
I am afraid it is no joke said Guy smiling
You must go It will never do for you to stay away said Laura decidedly
Are you tired Arent you well asked Amy
Quite well thank you but I am sure I had better not
Laura thought she had better not seem anxious to take him so she left the task of persuasion to the others and Amy went on
Neither Mamma nor Charlie could bear to think you stayed because of him
I dont I assure you Amy I meant it before I have been gradually finding out that it must come to this
Oh you think it a matter of right and wrong But you dont think balls wrong
Oh no only they wont do for such an absurd person as I am The last turned my head for a week and I am much too unsteady for this
Well if you think it a matter of duty it cant be helped said Amy sorrowfully but I am very sorry
Thank you said Guy thinking it compassion not regret but I shall do very well I shall be all the happier tomorrow for a quiet hour at my Greek and youll tell me all the fun
You liked it so much said Amy but you have made up your mind and I ought not to tease you
Thats right Amy he does it on purpose to be teased said Eveleen and I never knew anybody so provoking Mind Sir Guy if you make us all too late you shant have the ghost of a quadrille with me
I shall console myself by quadrilling with Andromache said Guy
Come no nonsense—off to dress directly How can you have the conscience to stand there when the carriage is at the door
I shall have great pleasure in handing you in when you are ready
Laura—Amy Does he really mean it
I am afraid he does said Amy
Eveleen let herself fall on the sofa as if fainting Oh she said take him away Let me never see the face of him again Im perfectly overcome All my teaching thrown away
I am sorry for you said Guy laughing
And how do you mean to face Maurice
Tell him his first bugle has so distracted me that I cant answer for the consequences if I come tonight
Mrs Edmonstone came in saying—
Come I have kept you waiting shamefully but I have been consoling myself by thinking you must be well entertained as I heard no Harmonious Blacksmith Papa will be wondering where we are
Oh mamma Guy wont go
Guy is anything the matter
Nothing thank you only idleness
This will never do You really must go Guy
Indeed I think not Pray dont order me Mrs Edmonstone
What oclock is it Amy Past ten Papa will be in despair What is to be done How long do you take to dress Guy
Not under an hour said Guy smiling
Nonsense But if there was time I should certainly send you Selfdiscipline may be carried too far Guy But now it cant be helped—I dont know how to keep papa waiting any longer Laura what shall I do
Let me go to Charles answered Guy Perhaps I can read him to sleep
Thank you but dont talk or he will be too excited Reading would be the very thing It will be a pretty story to tell every one who asks for you that I have left you to nurse my son
No for no such good reason said Guy only because I am a great fool
Well Sir Guy I am glad you can say one sensible word said Lady Eveleen
Too true I assure you he answered as he handed her in Good night You will keep the quadrille for me till I am rational
He handed the others in and shut the door Mrs Edmonstone ruffled out of her composure exclaimed—
Well this is provoking
Every one will be vexed said Laura
It will be so stupid said Amy
I give him up said Eveleen I once had hopes of him
If it was not for papa I really would turn back this moment and fetch him cried Mrs Edmonstone starting forward Im sure it will give offence I wish I had not consented
He cant be made to see that his presence is of importance to any living creature said Laura
What is the reason of this whim said Eveleen
No Eveleen it is not whim said Laura it is because he thinks dissipation makes him idle
Then if he is idle I wonder what the rest of the world is said Eveleen I am sure we all ought to stay at home too
I think so said Amy I know I shall feel all night as if I was wrong to be there
I am angry said Mrs Edmonstone and yet I believe it is a great sacrifice
Yes mamma after all our looking forward to it said Amy Oh yes and her voice lost its piteous tone it is a real sacrifice
If he was not a mere boy I should say a lovers quarrel was at the bottom of it said Eveleen Depend upon it Laura it is all your fault You only danced once with him at our ball and all this week you have played for us as if it was on purpose to cut him
Laura was glad of the darkness and her mother who had a particular dislike to jokes of this sort went on—If it were only ourselves I should not care but there are so many who will fancy it caprice or worse
The only comfort is said Amy that it is Charlies gain
I hope they will not talk said Mrs Edmonstone But Charlie will never hold his tongue He will grow excited and not sleep all night
Poor Mrs Edmonstone her trials did not end here for when she replied to her husbands inquiry for Guy Mr Edmonstone said offence had already been taken at his absence from the dinner he would not have had this happen for fifty pounds she ought not to have suffered it but it was all her nonsense about Charles and as to not being late she should have waited till midnight rather than not have brought him In short he said as much more than he meant as a man in a pet is apt to say and nevertheless Mrs Edmonstone had to look as amiable and smiling as if nothing was the matter
The least untruthful answer she could frame to the inquiries for Sir Guy Morville was that young men were apt to be lazy about balls and this sufficed for goodnatured Mrs Deane but Maurice poured out many exclamations about his illbehaviour and Philip contented himself with the mere fact of his not being there and made no remark
Laura turned her eyes anxiously on Philip They had not met since the important conversation on Ashendown and she found herself looking with more pride than ever at his tall noble figure as if he was more her own but the calmness of feeling was gone She could not meet his eye nor see him turn towards her without a start and tremor for which she could not render herself a reason and her heart beat so much that it was at once a relief and a disappointment that she was obliged to accept her other cousin as her first partner Philip had already asked Lady Eveleen for he neither wished to appear too eager in claiming Laura nor to let his friend think he had any dislike to the Irish girl
Eveleen was much pleased to have him for her partner and told herself she would be on her good behaviour It was a polka and there was not much talk which perhaps was all the better for her She admired the review and the luncheon and spoke of Charles without any sauciness and Philip was condescending and agreeable
I must indulge myself in abusing that stupid cousin of yours said she Did you ever know a man of such wonderful crotchets
This is a very unexpected one said Philip
It came like a thunder clap I thought till the last moment he was joking for he likes dancing so much he was the life of our ball and how could any one suppose he would fly off at the last moment
He seems rather to enjoy doing things suddenly
I tell Laura she has affronted him said Eveleen laughing She has been always busy of late when we have wanted her and I assure her his pride has been piqued Dont you think that is an explanation Captain Morville
It was Captain Morvilles belief but he would not say so
Isnt Laura looking lovely Eveleen went on I am sure she is the beauty of the night She was pleased to see Captain Morvilles attention gained She is even better dressed than at our ball—those Venetian pins suit the form of her head so well Her beauty is better than almost any ones because she has so much countenance
True said Philip
How proud Maurice looks of having her on his arm Does not he Poor Maurice he is desperately in love with her
As is shown by his pining melancholy
Eveleen laughed with her clear hearty laugh I see you know what we mean by being desperately in love No she added more gravely I am very glad it is only that kind of desperation One could not think of Maurice and Laura together He does not know the best part of Laura
Eveleen was highly flattered by Captain Morville conducting her a second time round the room instead of at once restoring her to her aunt
He secured Laura next and leading her away from her own party said Laura have you been overdoing it
It is not that said Laura wishing she could keep from blushing
It is the only motive that could excuse his extraordinary behaviour
Surely you know he says that he is growing unsettled It is part of his rule of self discipline
Absurd—exaggerated—incredible This is the same story as there was about the horse It is either caprice or temper and I am convinced that some change in your manner—nay I say unconscious and am far from blaming you—is the cause Why else did he devote himself to Charles and leave you all on my uncles hands in the crowd
We could shift for ourselves much better than Charlie
This confirms my belief that my warning was not mistimed I wish it could have been done without decidedly mortifying him and rousing his temper because I am sorry others should be slighted but if he takes your drawing back so much to heart it shows that it was time you should do so
If I thought I had
It was visible to others—to another I should say
O that is only Eveleens nonsense The only difference I am conscious of having made was keeping more upstairs and not trying to persuade him to come here tonight
I have no doubt it was this that turned the scale He only waited for persuasion and you acted very wisely in not flattering his selflove
Did I—I did not know it
A womans instinct is often better than reasoning Laura to do the right thing without knowing why But come I suppose we must play our part in the pageant of the night
For that evening Laura contrary to the evidence of her senses was persuaded by her own lover that Guy was falling in love with her and after musing all through the dance she said What do you think of the scheme that has been started for my going to Ireland with papa
Your going to Ireland
Yes you know none of us except papa have seen grandmamma since Charles began to be ill and there is some talk of his taking me with him when he goes this summer
I knew he was going but I thought it was not to be till later in the year—not till after the long vacation
So he intended but he finds he must be at home before the end of October and it would suit him best to go in August
Then what becomes of Guy
He stays at Hollywell It will be much better for Charles to have him there while papa is away I thought when the plan was first mentioned I should be sorry except that it is quite right to go to grandmamma but if it is so about Guy this absence would be a good thing—it would make a break and I could begin again on different terms
Wisely judged Laura Yes on that account it would be very desirable though it will be a great loss to me and I can hardly hope to be so near you on your return
Ah yes so I feared sighed Laura
But we must give up something and for Guys own sake poor fellow it will be better to make a break as you say It will save him pain by and by
I dare say papa will consult you about when his journey is to be His only doubt was whether it would do to leave Guy so long alone and if you say it would be safe it would decide him at once
I see little chance of mischief Guy has few temptations here and a strong sense of honour besides I shall be at hand Taking all things into consideration Laura I think that whatever the sacrifice to ourselves it is expedient to recommend his going at once and your accompanying him
All the remainder of the evening Philip was occupied with attentions to the rest of the world but Lauras eyes followed him everywhere and though she neither expected nor desired him to bestow more time on her she underwent a strange restlessness and impatience of feeling Her numerous partners teased her by hindering her from watching him moving about the room catching his tones and guessing what he was talking of—not that she wanted to meet his eye for she did not like to blush nor did she think it pleased him to see her do so for he either looked away immediately or conveyed a glance which she understood as monitory She kept better note of his countenance than of her own partners
Mr Thorndale meanwhile kept aloof from Lady Eveleen de Courcy but Captain Morville perceived that his eyes were often turned towards her and well knew it was principle and not inclination that held him at a distance He did indeed once ask her to dance but she was engaged and he did not ask her to reserve a future dance for him but contented himself with little Amy
Amy was doing her best to enjoy herself because she thought it ungrateful not to receive pleasure from those who wished to give it but to her it wanted the zest and animation of Lady Kilcorans ball Besides she knew she had been as idle as Guy or still more so and she thought it wrong she should have pleasure while he was doing penance It was on her mind and damped her spirits and though she smiled and talked and admired and danced lightly and gaily there was a sensation of weariness throughout and no one but Eveleen was sorry when Mrs Edmonstone sent Maurice to see for the carriage
Philip was one of the gentlemen who came to shawl them As he put Lauras cloak round her shoulders he was able to whisper Take care you must be cautious—selfcommand
Laura though blushing and shrinking the moment before was braced by his words and tone to attempt all he wished She looked up in what she meant to be an indifferent manner and made some observation in a careless tone—anything rather than let Philip think her silly After what he had said was she not bound more than ever to exert herself to the utmost that he might not be disappointed in her She loved him only the better for what others might have deemed a stern coldness of manner for it made the contrast of his real warmth of affection more precious She mused over it as much as her companions conversation would allow on the road home They arrived Mrs Edmonstone peeped into Charless room announced that he was quietly asleep and they all bade each other good night or good morning and parted
CHAPTER 10
Leonora Yet often with respect he speaks of thee
Tasso Thou meanest with forbearance prudent subtle
Tis that annoys me for he knows to use
Language so smooth and so conditional
That seeming praise from him is actual blame
—GOETHES Tasso
When the Hollywell party met at breakfast Charles showed himself by no means the worse for his yesterdays experiment He said he had gone to sleep in reasonable time lulled by some poetry he knew not what of which Guys voice had made very pretty music and he was now full of talk about the amusement he had enjoyed yesterday which seemed likely to afford food for conversation for many a week to come After all the care Guy had taken of him Mrs Edmonstone could not find it in her heart to scold and her husband having spent his vexation upon her had none left to bestow on the real culprit So when Guy with his bright morning face and his hair hanging shining and wet round it opened the diningroom door on his return from bathing in the river Mr Edmonstones salutation only conveyed that humorous anger that no one cares for
Good morning to you Sir Guy Morville I wonder what you have to say for yourself
Nothing said Guy smiling then as he took his place by Mrs Edmonstone I hope you are not tired after your hard days work
Not at all thank you
Amy can you tell me the name of this flower
Oh have you really found the arrowhead How beautiful Where did you get it I didnt know it grew in our river
There is plenty of it in that reedy place beyond the turn I thought it looked like something out of the common way
Yes What a purple eye it has I must draw it O thank you
And Charlotte Bustle has found you a moorhens nest
How delightful Is it where I can go and see the dear little things
It is rather a swamp but I have been putting down steppingstones for you and I dare say I can jump you across It was that which made me so late for which I ought to have asked pardon said he to Mrs Edmonstone with his look of courtesy
Never did man look less like an offended lover or like a morose selftormentor
There are others later said Mrs Edmonstone looking at Lady Eveleens empty chair
So you think that is all you have to ask pardon for said Mr Edmonstone I advise you to study your apologies for you are in pretty tolerable disgrace
Indeed I am very sorry said Guy with such a change of countenance that Mr Edmonstones good nature could not bear to see it
Oh tis no concern of mine It would be going rather the wrong way indeed for you to be begging my pardon for all the care youve been taking of Charlie but you had better consider what you have to say for yourself before you show your face at Broadstone
No said Guy puzzled for a moment but quickly looking relieved and laughing What Broadstone in despair for want of me
And we perfectly exhausted with answering questions as to what was become of Sir Guy
Dreadful said Guy now laughing heartily in the persuasion that it was all a joke
O Lady Eveleen good morning you are come in good time to give me the story of the ball for no one else tells me one word about it
Because you dont deserve it said she I hope you have repented by this time
If you want to make me repent you should give me a very alluring description
I shant say one word about it I shall send you to Coventry as Maurice and all the regiment mean to do said Eveleen turning away from him with a very droll arch manner of offended dignity
Hear hear Eveleen send any one to Coventry cried Charles See what the regiment say to you
Ay when I am sent to Coventry
O Paddy Paddy cried Charles and there was a general laugh
Laura seems to be doing it in good earnest without announcing it added Charles when the laugh was over which is the worst sign of all
Nonsense Charles said Laura hastily then afraid she had owned to annoyance she blushed and was angry with herself for blushing
Well Laura do tell me who your partners were
Very provoking thought Laura that I cannot say what is so perfectly natural and ordinary without my foolish cheeks tingling He may think it is because he is speaking to me So she hurried on Maurice first then Philip and then showed what Amy and Eveleen thought strange oblivion of the rest of her partners
They proceeded into the history of the ball and Guy thought no more of his offences till the following day when he went to Broadstone Coming back he found the drawingroom full of visitors and was obliged to sit down and join in the conversation but Mrs Edmonstone saw he was inwardly chafing as he betrayed by his inability to remain still the twitchings of his forehead and lip and a tripping and stumbling of the words on his tongue She was sure he wanted to talk to her and longed to get rid of Mrs Brownlow but the door was no sooner shut on the visitors than Mr Edmonstone came in with a long letter for her to read and comment upon Guy took himself out of the way of the consultation and began to hurry up and down the terrace until seeing Amabel crossing the field towards the little gate into the garden he went to open it for her
She looked up at him and exclaimed—Is anything the matter
Nothing to signify he said I was only waiting for your mother I have got into a mess that is all
I am sorry began Amy there resting in the doubt whether she might inquire further and intending not to burthen him with her company any longer than till she reached the house door but Guy went on—
No you have no occasion to be sorry it is all my own fault at least if I was clear how it is my fault I should not mind it so much It is that ball I am sure I had not the least notion any one would care whether I was there or not
I am sure we missed you very much
You are all so kind beside I belong in a manner you but what could it signify to any one else And here I find that I have vexed every one
Ah said Amy mamma said she was afraid it would give offence
I ought to have attended to her It was a fit of self-will in managing myself said Guy murmuring low as if trying to find the real indictment yet I thought it a positive duty wrong every way
What has happened said Amy turning back with him though she had reached the door
Why the first person I met was Mr Gordon and he spoke like your father half in joke and I thought entirely so he said something about all the world being in such a rage that I was a bold man to venture into Broadstone Then while I was at Mr Lascelles in came Dr Mayerne We missed you at the dinner he said and I hear you shirked the ball too I told him how it was and he said he was glad that was all and advised me to go and call on Colonel Deane and explain I thought that the best way—indeed I meant it before and was walking to his lodgings when Maurice de Courcy met me Ha he cries out Morville I thought at least you would have been laid up for a month with the typhus fever As a friend I advise you to go home and catch something for it is the only excuse that will serve you I am not quite sure that it will not be high treason for me to be seen speaking to you I tried to get at the rights of it but he is such a harumscarum fellow there was no succeeding Next I met Thorndale who only bowed and passed on the other side of the street—sign enough how it was with Philip so I thought it best to go at once to the Captain and get a rational account of what was the matter
Did you said Amy who though concerned and rather alarmed had been smiling at the humorous and expressive tones with which he could not help giving effect to his narration
Yes Philip was at home and very—very—
Gracious suggested Amy as he hesitated for a word
Just so Only the vexatious thing was that we never could succeed in coming to an understanding He was ready to forgive but I could not disabuse him of an idea—where he picked it up I cannot guess—that I had stayed away out of pique He would not even tell me what he thought had affronted me though I asked him over and over again to be only straightforward he declared I knew
How excessively provoking cried Amy You cannot guess what he meant
Not the least in the world I have not the most distant suspicion It was of no use to declare I was not offended with any one he only looked in that way of his as if he knew much better than I did myself and told me he could make allowances
Worse than all How horrid of him
No dont spoil me No doubt he thinks he has grounds and my irritation was unjustifiable Yes I got into my old way He cautioned me and nearly made me mad I never was nearer coming to a regular outbreak Always the same Fool that I am
Now Guy that is always your way when other people are provoking you abuse yourself I am sure Philip was so with his calm assertion of being right
The more provoking the more trial for me
But you endured it You say it was only nearly an outbreak You parted friends I am sure of that
Yes it would have been rather too bad not to do that
Then why do you scold yourself when you really had the victory
The victory will be if the inward feeling as well as the outward token is ever subdued
O that must be in time of course Only let me hear how you got on with Colonel Deane
He was very goodnatured and would have laughed it off but Philip went with me and looked grand and begged in a solemn way that no more might be said I could have got on better alone but Philip was very kind or as you say gracious
And provoking added Amy only I believe you do not like me to say so
It is more agreeable to hear you call him so at this moment than is good for me I have no right to complain since I gave the offence
The offence
The absenting myself
Oh that you did because you thought it right
I want to be clear that it was right
What do you mean cried she astonished It was a great piece of self-denial and I only felt it wrong not to be doing the same
Nay how should such creatures as you need the same discipline as I
She exclaimed to herself how far from his equal she was—how weak idle and selfpleasing she felt herself to be but she could not say so—the words would not come and she only drooped her little head humbled by his treating her as better than himself
He proceeded—
Something wrong I have done and I want the clue Was it selfwill in choosing discipline contrary to your mothers judgment Yet she could not know all I thought it her kindness in not liking me to lose the pleasure Besides one must act for oneself and this was only my own personal amusement
Yes said Amy timidly hesitating
Well said he with the gentle deferential tone that contrasted with his hasty vehement selfaccusations Well and he waited though not so as to hurry or frighten her but to encourage by showing her words had weight
I was thinking of one thing said Amy is it not sometimes right to consider whether we ought to disappoint people who want us to be pleased
There it is I believe said Guy stopping and considering then going on with a better satisfied air that is a real rule Not to be so bent on myself as to sacrifice other peoples feelings to what seems best for me But I dont see whose pleasure I interfered with
Amy could have answered Mine but the maidenly feeling checked her again and she said We all thought you would like it
And I had no right to sacrifice your pleasure I see I see The pleasure of giving pleasure to others is so much the best there is on earth that one ought to be passive rather than interfere with it
Yes said Amy just as I have seen Mary Ross let herself be swung till she was giddy rather than disappoint Charlotte and Helen who thought she liked it
If one could get to look at everything with as much indifference as the swinging But it is all selfishness It is as easy to be selfish for ones own good as for ones own pleasure and I dare say the first is as bad as the other
I was thinking of something else said Amy I should think it more like the holly tree in Southey Dont you know it The young leaves are sharp and prickly because they have so much to defend themselves from but as the tree grows older it leaves off the spears after it has won the victory
Very kind of you and very pretty Amy said he smiling but in the meantime it is surely wrong to be more prickly than is unavoidable and there is the perplexity Selfish selfish selfish Oneself the first object That is the root
Guy if it is not impertinent to ask I do wish you would tell me one thing Why did you think it wrong to go to that ball said Amy timidly
I dont know that I thought it wrong to go to that individual ball said Guy but my notion was that altogether I was getting into a rattling idle way never doing my proper quantity of work or doing it properly and talking a lot of nonsense sometimes I thought last Sunday it was time to make a short turn somewhere and bring myself up I could not or did not get out of the pleasant talks as Laura does so I thought giving up this ball would punish me at once and set me on a new tack of behaving like a reasonable creature
Dont call yourself too many names or you wont be civil to us We all except Laura have been quite as bad
Yes but you had not so much to do
We ought said Amy but I meant to be reasonable when Eveleen is gone
Perhaps I ought to have waited till then but I dont know Lady Eveleen is so amusing that it leads to farther dawdling and it would not do to wait to resist the temptation till it is out of the way
As he spoke they saw Mrs Edmonstone coming out and went to meet her Guy told her his trouble detailing it more calmly than before he had found out his mistake She agreed with him that this had been in forgetting that his attending the ball did not concern only himself but he then returned to say that he could not see what difference it made except to their own immediate circle
If it was not you Guy who made that speech I should call it fishing for a compliment You forget that rank and station make people sought after
I suppose there is something in that said Guy thoughtfully at any rate it is no bad thing to think so it is so humiliating
That is not the way most people would take it
No Does not it prevent one from taking any attention as paid to ones real self The real flattering thing would be to be made as much of as Philip is for ones own merits and not for the handle to ones name
Yes I think so said Amy
Well then as if he wished to gather the whole conversation into one resolve the point is to consider whether abstaining from innocent things that may be dangerous to oneself mortifies other people If so the vexing them is a certain wrong whereas the mischief of taking the pleasure is only a possible contingency But then one must take it out of oneself some other way or it becomes an excuse for selfindulgence
Hardly with you said Mrs Edmonstone smiling
Because I had rather go at it at once and forget all about other people You must teach me consideration Mrs Edmonstone and in the meantime will you tell me what you think I had better do about this scrape
Let it alone said Mrs Edmonstone You have begged every ones pardon and it had better be forgotten as fast as possible They have made more fuss already than it is worth Dont torment yourself about it any more for if you have made a mistake it is on the right side and on the first opportunity Ill go and call on Mrs Deane and see if she is very implacable
The dressingbell rang and Amy ran upstairs stopping at Lauras door to ask how she prospered in the drive she had been taking with Charles and Eveleen
Amy told her of Guys trouble and oh awkward question inquired if she could guess what it could be that Philip imagined that Guy had been offended at
Cant he guess said poor Laura to gain time and brushing her hair over her face
No he has no idea though Philip protested that he knew and would not tell him Philip must have been most tiresome
What Has Guy been complaining
No only angry with himself for being vexed I cant think how Philip can go on so
Hush hush Amy you know nothing about it He has reasons—
I know said Amy indignantly but what right has he to go on mistrusting If people are to be judged by their deeds no one is so good as Guy and it is too bad to reckon up against him all his ancestors have done It is wolf and lamb indeed
He does not cried Laura He never is unjust How can you say so Amy
Then why does he impute motives and not straightforwardly tell what he means
It is impossible in this case said Laura
Do you know what it is
Yes said Laura perfectly truthful and feeling herself in a dreadful predicament
And you cant tell me
I dont think I can
Nor Guy
Not for worlds cried Laura in horror
Cant you get Philip to tell him
Oh no no I cant explain it Amy and all that can be done is to let it die away as fast as possible It is only the rout about it that is of consequence
It is very odd said Amy but I must dress and away she ran much puzzled but with no desire to look into Philips secrets
Laura rested her head on her hand sighed and wondered why it was so hard to answer She almost wished she had said Philip had been advising her to discourage any attachment on Guys part but then Amy might have laughed and asked why No no Philips confidence was in her keeping and cost her what it might she would be faithful to the trust
There was now a change The evenings were merry but the mornings were occupied Guy went off to his room as he used to do last winter Laura commenced some complicated perspective or read a German book with a great deal of dictionary Amy had a book of history and practised her music diligently even Charles read more to himself and resumed the study with Guy and Amy Lady Eveleen joined in every ones pursuits enjoyed them and lamented to Laura that it was impossible to be rational at her own home
Laura tried to persuade her that there was no need that she should be on the level of the society round her and it ended in her spending an hour in diligent study every morning promising to continue it when she went home while Laura made such sensible comments that Eveleen admired her more than ever and she knowing that some were secondhand from Philip others arising from his suggestions gave him all the homage paid to herself as a tribute to him who reigned over her whole being
Yet she was far from happy Her reserve towards Guy made her feel stiff and guarded she had a craving for Philips presence with a dread of showing it which made her uncomfortable She wondered he had not been at Hollywell since the bail for he must know that she was going to Ireland in a fortnight and was not likely to return till his regiment had left Broadstone
An interval passed long enough for her not to be alone in her surprise at his absenting himself before he at length made his appearance just before luncheon so as to miss the unconstrained morning hours he used so much to enjoy He found Guy Charles and Amy deep in Butlers Analogy
Are you making poor little Amy read that said he
Bravo cried Charles he is so disappointed that it is not Pickwick that he does not know what else to say
I dont suppose I take much in said Amy but I like to be told what it means
Dont imagine I can do that said Guy
I never spent much time over it said Philip but I should think you were out of your depth
Very well said Charles we will return to Dickens to oblige you
It is your pleasure to wrest my words replied Philip in his own calm manner though he actually felt hurt which he had never done before His complacency was less secure so that there was more need for selfassertion
Where are the rest he asked
Laura and Eveleen are making a dictation lesson agreeable to Charlotte said Amy I found Eva making mistakes on purpose
How much longer does she stay
Till Tuesday Lord Kilcoran is coming to fetch her
Charlotte entered and immediately ran upstairs to announce her cousins arrival Laura was glad of this previous notice and hoped her blush and tremor were not observed It was a struggle through luncheon time to keep her colour and confusion within bounds but she succeeded better than she fancied she did and Philip gave her as much help as he could by not looking at her Seeing that he dreaded nothing so much as her exciting suspicion she was at once braced and alarmed
Her father was very glad to see him and reproached him for making himself a stranger while her sisters counted up the days of his absence
There was the time to be sure when we met you on Ashendown but that was a regular cheat Laura had you all to herself
Laura bent down to feed Bustle and Philip felt his colour deepening
Mr Edmonstone went on to ask him to come and stay at Hollywell for a week vowing he would take no refusal A week was out of the question said Philip but he could come for two nights Amabel hinted that there was to be a dinnerparty on Thursday thinking it fair to give him warning of what he disliked but he immediately chose that very day Again he disconcerted all expectations when it was time to go out Mrs Edmonstone and Charles were going to drive the young ladies and Guy to walk but Philip disposed himself to accompany his uncle in a survey of the wheat
Laura perceived that he would not risk taking another walk with her when they might be observed It showed implicit trust to leave her to his rival but she was sorry to find that caution must put an end to the freedom of their intercourse and would have stayed at home but that Eveleen was so wild and unguarded that Mrs Edmonstone did not like her to be without Laura as a check on her especially when Guy was of the party There was some comfort in that warm pressure of her hand when she bade Philip goodbye and on that she lived for a long time He stood at the window watching them till they were out of sight then moved towards his aunt who with her bonnet on was writing an invitation for Thursday to Mr Thorndale
I was thinking said he in a low voice if it would not be as well if you liked to ask Thorndale here for those two days
If you think so returned Mrs Edmonstone looking at him more inquiringly than he could well bear
You know how he enjoys being here and I owe them all so much kindness
Certainly I will speak to your uncle said she going in search of him She presently returned saying they should be very glad to see Mr Thorndale asking him at the same time in her kind tones of interest after an old servant for whom he had been spending much thought and pains The kindness cut him to the heart for it evidently arose from a perception that he was ill at ease and his conscience smote him He answered shortly and was glad when the carriage came he lifted Charles into it and stood with folded arms as they drove away
The air is stormy said Charles looking back at him
You thought so too said Mrs Edmonstone eagerly
You did
I have wondered for some time past
It was very decided today—that long absence—and there was no provoking him to be sententious His bringing his young man might be only to keep him in due subjection but his choosing the day of the party and above all not walking with the young ladies
It not like himself said Mrs Edmonstone in a leading tone
Either the sweet youth is in love or in the course of some strange transformation
In love she exclaimed Have you any reason for thinking so
Only as a solution of phenomena; but you look as if I had hit on the truth
I hope it is no such thing yet—
Yet repeated Charles seriously I think he has discovered the danger
The danger of falling in love with Laura Well it would be odd if he was not satisfied with his own work But he must know how preposterous that would be
And you think that would prevent it said his mother smiling He is just the man to plume himself on making his judgment conquer his inclination setting novels at defiance How magnanimously he would resolve to stifle a hopeless attachment
That is exactly what I think he is doing I think he has found out the state of his feelings and is doing all in his power to check them by avoiding her especially in teteatetes and an unconstrained family party I am nearly convinced that is his reason for bringing Mr Thorndale and fixing on the day of the dinner Poor fellow it must cost him a great deal and I long to tell him how I thank him
Hm I dont think it unlikely said Charles It agrees with what happened the evening of the Kilcoran ball when he was ready to eat me up for saying something he fancied was a hint of a liking of Guys for Laura It was a wild mistake for something I said about Petrarch forgetting that Petrarch suggested Laura but it put him out to a degree and he made all manner of denunciations on the horror of Guys falling in love with her Now as far as I see Guy is much more in love with you or with Deloraine and the idea argues far more that the Captain himself is touched
Depend upon it Charlie it was this that led to his detecting the true state of the case Ever since that he has kept away It is noble
And what do you think about Laura
Poor child I doubt if it was well to allow so much intimacy yet I dont see how it could have been helped
So you think she is in for it I hope not but she has not been herself of late
I think she misses what she has been used to from him and thinks him estranged but I trust it goes no further I see she is out of spirits I wish I could help her dear girl but the worst of all would be to let her guess the real name and meaning of all this so I cant venture to say a word
She is very innocent of novels said Charles and that is well It would be an unlucky business to have our poor beauty either sitting like Patience on a monument or cockit up on a baggagewaggon But that will never be Philip is not the man to have a wife in barracks He would have her like his books in morocco or not at all
He would never involve her in discomforts He may be entirely trusted and as long as he goes on as he has begun there is no harm done Laura will cheer up will only consider him as her cousin and friend and never know he has felt more for her
Her going to Ireland is very fortunate
It has made me still more glad that the plan should take place at once
And you say nothing to nobody
Of course not We must not let him guess we have observed anything there is no need to make your father uncomfortable and such things need not dawn on Amys imagination
It may be wondered at that Mrs Edmonstone should confide such a subject to her son but she knew that in a case really affecting his sister and thus introduced his silence was secure In fact confidence was the only way to prevent the shrewd unscrupulous raillery which would have caused great distress and perhaps led to the very disclosure to be deprecated Of late too there had been such a decrease of petulance in Charles as justified her in trusting him and lastly it must be observed that she was one of those openhearted people who cannot make a discovery nor endure an anxiety without imparting it Her tact indeed led her to make a prudent choice of confidants and in this case her son was by far the best though she had spoken without premeditation Her nature would never have allowed her to act as her daughter was doing she would have been without the strength to conceal her feelings especially when deprived of the safetyvalve of free intercourse with their object
The visit took place as arranged and very uncomfortable it was to all who looked deeper than the surface In the first place Philip found there the last person he wished his friend to meet—Lady Eveleen who had been persuaded to stay for the dinnerparty but Mr Thorndale was as Charles would have said on his good behaviour and ashamed of the fascination her manners exercised over him was resolved to resist it answered her gay remarks with brief sentences and stiff smiles and consorted chiefly with the gentlemen
Laura was grave and silent trying to appear unconscious and only succeeding in being visibly constrained Philip was anxious and stern in his attempts to appear unconcerned and even Guy was not quite as bright and free as usual being puzzled as to how far he was forgiven about the ball
Amabel could not think what had come to every one and tried in vain to make them sociable In the evening they had recourse to a game said to be for Charlottes amusement but in reality to obviate some of the stiffness and constraint yet even this led to awkward situations Each person was to set down his or her favourite character in history and fiction flower virtue and time at which to have lived and these were all to be appropriated to the writers The first read was—
Lily of the valley—truth—Joan of Arc—Padre Cristoforo—the present time
Amy exclaimed Guy
I see you are right said Charles but tell me your grounds
Padre Cristoforo was the answer
Fancy little Amy choosing Joan of Arc said Eveleen she who is afraid of a tolerable sized grasshopper
I should like to have been Joans sister and heard her tell about her visions said Amy
You would have taught her to believe them said Philip
Taught her cried Guy Surely you take the high view of her
I think said Philip that she is a much injured person as much by her friends as her enemies but I dont pretend to enter either enthusiastically or philosophically into her character
What was it that made Guys brow contract as he began to strip the feather of a pen till recollecting himself he threw it from him with a dash betraying some irritation and folded his hands
Lavender read Charlotte
What should make any one choose that cried Eveleen
I know said Mrs Edmonstone looking up I shall never forget the tufts of lavender round the kitchen garden at Stylehurst
Philip smiled Charlotte proceeded and Charles saw Lauras colour deepening as she bent over her work
Lavender—steadfastness—Strafford—Cordelia in King Lear—the late war How funny cried Charlotte For hear the next Honeysuckle—steadfastness—Lord Strafford—Cordelia—the present time Why Laura you must have copied it from Philips
Laura neither looked nor spoke Philip could hardly command his countenance as Eveleen laughed and told him he was much flattered by those becoming blushes But here Charles broke in—Come make haste Charlotte dont be all night about it and as Charlotte paused as if to make some dangerous remark he caught the paper and read the next himself Nothing so startled Philip as this desire to cover their confusion Laura was only sensible of the relief of having attention drawn from her by the laugh that followed
A shamrock—Captain Rock—the tailor that was blue moulded for want of a bating—Pat Riotism—the time of Malachy with the collar of gold
Eva cried Charlotte
Nonsense said Eveleen I am glad I know your tastes Charles They do you honour
More than yours do if these are yours said Charles reading them contemptuously Rose—generosity—Charles Edward—Catherine Seyton—the civil wars
You had better not have disowned Charlies Lady Eveleen said Guy
Nay do you think I would put up with such a set as these retorted Charles I am not fallen so low as the essence of young ladyism
What can you find to say against them said Eveleen
Nothing said Charles No one ever can find anything to say for or against young ladies tastes
You seem to be rather in the case of the tailor yourself said Guy ready to do battle if you could but get any opposition
Only tell me said Amy how you could wish to live in the civil wars
O because they would be so entertaining
Theres Paddy genuine Paddy at last exclaimed Charles Depend upon it the conventional young lady wont do Eva
After much more discussion and one or two more papers came Guys—the last Heather—Truth—King Charles—Sir Galahad—the present time
Sir how much exclaimed Charles
Dont you know him said Guy Sir Galahad—the Knight of the Siege Perilous—who won the Saint Greal
What language is that said Charles
What Dont you know the Morte dArthur I thought every one did Dont you Philip
I once looked into it It is very curious in classical English but it is a book no one could read through
Oh cried Guy indignantly then but you only looked into it If you had lived with its two fat volumes you could not help delighting in it It was my boatingbook for at least three summers
That accounts for it said Philip a book so studied in boyhood acquires a charm apart from its actual merits
But it has actual merits The depth the mystery the allegory—the beautiful characters of some of the knights
You look through the medium of your imagination said Philip but you must pardon others for seeing a great sameness of character and adventure and for disapproving of the strange mixture of religion and romance
Youve never read it said Guy striving to speak patiently
A cursory view is sufficient to show whether a book will repay the time spent in reading it
A cursory view enable one to judge better than making it your study Eh Philip said Charles
It is no paradox The actual merits are better seen by an unprejudiced stranger than by an old friend who lends them graces of his own devising
Charles laughed Guy pushed back his chair and went to look out at the window Perhaps Philip enjoyed thus chafing his temper for after all he had said to Laura it was satisfactory to see his opinion justified so that he might not feel himself unfair It relieved his uneasiness lest his understanding with Laura should be observed It had been in great peril that evening for as the girls went up to bed Eveleen gaily said Why Laura have you quarrelled with Captain Morville
How can you say such things Eva Good night And Laura escaped into her own room
Whats the meaning of it Amy pursued Eveleen
Only a stranger makes us more formal said Amy
What an innocent you are It is of no use to talk to you said Eveleen running away
No but Eva said Amy pursuing her dont go off with a wrong fancy Charles has teased Laura so much about Philip that of course it makes her shy of him before strangers and it would never have done to laugh about their choosing the same things when Mr Thorndale was there
I must be satisfied I suppose I know that is what you think for you could not say any other
But what do you think said Amy puzzled
I wont tell you little innocence—it would only shock you
Nothing you really thought about Laura could shock me said Amy I dont mean what you might say in play
Well then shall you think me in play or earnest when I say that I think Laura likes Philip very much
In play said Amy for you know that if we had not got our own Charlie to show us what a brother is we should think of Philip as just the same as a brother
A brother You are pretending to be more simple than you really are Amy Dont you know what I mean
O said Amy her cheeks lighting up that must be only play for he has never asked her
Ah but suppose she was in the state just ready to be asked
No that could never be for he could never ask her
Why not little Amy
Because we are cousins and everything said Amy confused Dont talk any more about it Eva for though I know it is all play I dont like it and mamma would not wish me to talk of such things And dont you laugh about it dear Eva pray for it only makes every one uncomfortable Pray
Amy had a very persuasive way of saying pray and Eveleen thought she must yield to it Besides she respected Laura and Captain Morville too much to resolve to laugh at them whatever she might do when her fear of the Captain made her saucy
Mrs Edmonstone thought it best on all accounts to sit in the drawingroom the next morning but she need not have taken so much pains to chaperon her young ladies for the gentlemen did not come near them
Laura was more at ease in manner though very far from happy for she was restlessly eager for a talk with Philip while he was resolved not to seek a private interview sure that it would excite suspicion and willing to lose the consciousness of his underhand proceedings
This was the day of the dinnerparty and Lauras heart leaped as she calculated that it must fall to Philips lot to hand her in to dinner She was not mistaken he did give her his arm and they found themselves most favourably placed for Philips other neighbour was Mrs Brownlow talking at a great rate to Mr de Courcy and on Lauras side was the rather deaf Mr Hayley who had quite enough to do to talk to Miss Brownlow Charles was not at table and not one suspicious eye could rest on them yet it was not till the second course was in progress that he said anything which the whole world might not have heard Something had passed about Canterbury and its distance from Hollywell
I can be here often said Philip
I am glad
If you can only be guarded—and I think you are becoming so
Is this a time to speak of— Oh dont
It is the only time No one is attending and I have something to say to you
Overpowering her dire confusion in obedience to him she looked at the epergne and listened
You have acted prudently You have checked— and he indicated Guy—without producing more than moderate annoyance You have only to guard your selfpossession
It is very foolish she murmured
Ordinary women say so and rest contented with the folly You can do better things
There was a thrill of joy at finding him conversing with her as his own it overcame her embarrassment and alarm and wishes he would not choose such a time for speaking
How shall I said she
Employ yourself Employ and strengthen your mind
How shall I and without you
Find something to prevent you from dwelling on the future That drawing is dreamy work employing the fingers and leaving the mind free
I have been trying to read but I cannot fix my mind
Suppose you take what will demand attention Mathematics algebra I will send you my first book of algebra and it will help you to work down many useless dreams and anxieties
Thank you pray do I shall be very glad of it
You will find it give a power and stability to your mind and no longer have to complain of frivolous occupation
I dont feel frivolous now said Laura sadly I dont know why it is that everything is so altered I am really happier but my light heart is gone
You have but now learnt the full powers of your soul Laura you have left the world of childhood with the gay feelings which have no depth
I have what is better she whispered
You have indeed But those feelings must be regulated and strengthening the intellect strengthens the governing power
Philip with all his sense was mystifying himself because he was departing from right the only true good sense His right judgment in all things was becoming obscured so he talked metaphysical jargon instead of plain practical truth and thought he was teaching Laura to strengthen her powers of mind instead of giving way to dreams when he was only leading her to stifle meditation and thus securing her complete submission to himself
She was happier after this conversation and better able to pay attention to the guests nor did she feel guilty when obliged to play and sing in the evening—for she knew he must own that she could do no otherwise
Lady Eveleen gave however its brilliancy to the party She had something wonderfully winning and fascinating about her and Philip owned to himself that it took no small resolution on the part of Mr Thorndale to keep so steadily aloof from the party in the bay window where she was reigning like a queen and inspiring gaiety like a fairy She made Guy sing with her it was the first time he had ever sung except among themselves as Mrs Edmonstone had never known whether he would like to be asked but Eveleen refused to sing some of the Irish melodies unless he would join her and without making any difficulty he did so Mrs Brownlow professed to be electrified and Eveleen declaring that she knew she sung like a peacock told Mrs Brownlow that the thing to hear was Sir Guy singing glees with Laura and Amy Of course they were obliged to sing Mrs Brownlow was delighted and as she had considerable knowledge of music they all grew eager and Philip thought it very foolish of Guy to allow so much of his talent and enthusiasm to display themselves
When all the people were gone and the home party had wished each other goodnight Philip lingered in the drawingroom to finish a letter Guy after helping Charles upstairs came down a few moments after to fetch something which he had forgotten Philip looked up—You contributed greatly to the entertainment this evening he said
Guy coloured not quite sure that this was not said sarcastically and provoked with himself for being vexed
You think one devoid of the sixth sense has no right to speak said Philip
I cant expect all to think it as I do one of the best things in this world or out of it said Guy speaking quickly
I know it is so felt by those who understand its secrets said Philip I would not depreciate it so you may hear me patiently Guy I only meant to warn you that it is often the means of bringing persons into undesirable intimacies from which they cannot disentangle themselves as easily as they enter them
A flush crossed Guys cheek but it passed and he simply said—I suppose it may Goodnight
Philip looked after him and pondered on what it was that had annoyed him—manner words or advice He ascribed it to Guys unwillingness to be advised since he had observed that his counsel was apt to irritate him though his good sense often led him to follow it In the present case Philip thought Mrs Brownlow and her society by no means desirable for a youth like Guy and he was quite right
Philip and his friend went the next morning and in the afternoon Laura received the book of algebra—a very original first gift from a lover It came openly with a full understanding that she was to use it by his recommendation her mother and brother both thought they understood the motive which one thought very wise and the other very characteristic
Lord Kilcoran and Lady Eveleen also departed Eveleen very sorry to go though a little comforted by the prospect of seeing Laura so soon in Ireland where she would set her going in all kinds of rationalities—reading and school teaching and everything else
Ay said Charles when all were out of hearing but his mother and I shrewdly suspect the comfort would be still greater if it was Sir Guy Morville who was coming
It would be no bad thing said his mother Eveleen is a nice creature with great capabilities
Capabilities but will they ever come to anything
In a few years said Mrs Edmonstone and he is a mere boy at present so there is plenty of time for both to develop themselves
Most true madame mere but it remains to be proved whether the liking for Sir Guy which has taken hold of my lady Eveleen is strong enough to withstand all the coquetting with young Irishmen and all the idling at Kilcoran
I hope she has something better to be relied on than the liking for Sir Guy
You may well do so for I think he has no notion of throwing off his allegiance to you—his first and only love He liked very well to make fun with Eva but he regarded her rather as a siren who drew him off from his Latin and Greek
Yes I am ashamed of myself for such a fit of matchmaking Forget it Charlie as fast as you can
CHAPTER 11
This warlds wealth when I think ot
Its pride and a the lave ot
Fie fie on silly coward man
That he should be the slave ot
—BURNS
In another week Mr Edmonstone and his eldest daughter were to depart on their Irish journey Laura besides the natural pain in leaving home was sorry to be no longer near Philip especially as it was not likely that he would be still at Broadstone on their return yet she was so restless and dissatisfied that any change was welcome and the fear of betraying herself almost took away the pleasure of his presence
He met them at the railway station at Broadstone where Mr Edmonstone finding himself much too early recollected something he had forgotten in the town and left his daughter to walk up and down the platform under Philips charge They felt it a precious interval but both were out of spirits and could hardly profit by it
You will be gone long before we come back said Laura
In a fortnight or three weeks probably
But you will still be able to come to Hollywell now and then
I hope so It is all the pleasure I can look for We shall never see such a summer again
Oh it has been a memorable one
Memorable Yes It has given me an assurance that compensates for all I have lost yet it has made me feel more than ever before how poverty withers a mans hopes
O Philip I always thought your poverty a great noble thing
You thought like a generoustempered girl who has known nothing of its effects
And do you know that Guy says the thing to be proud of is of holding the place you do without the aid of rank or riches
I would not have it otherwise—I would not for worlds that my father had acted otherwise said Philip You understand that Laura
Of course I do
But when you speak—when Guy speaks of my holding the place I do you little know what it is to feel that powers of usefulness are wasted—to know I have the means of working my way to honour and distinction such as you would rejoice in Laura to have it all within yet feel it thrown away Locksley Hall again—every door is barred with gold and opens but to golden keys
I wish there was anything to be done said Laura
It is my profession that is the bar to everything I have sold the best years of my life and for what To see my sister degrade herself by that marriage
That is the real grief said Laura
But for that I should never have cast a look back on what I relinquished However why do I talk of these things these vain regrets They only occurred because my welfare does not concern myself alone—and heres your father
Mr Edmonstone returned out of breath in too much bustle remark his daughters blushes Even when the train was moving off he still had his head out at the window calling to Philip that they should expect a visit from him as soon as ever they returned Such cordiality gave Philip a pang and in bitterness of spirit he walked back to the barracks On the way he met Mrs Deane who wanted to consult him about inviting his cousin Sir Guy to a dinnerparty she intended to give next week Such an agreeable sensible youth and we feel we owe him some attention he took so much pains to make apologies about the ball
I dare say he will be very happy to come
We will write at once He is a very fine young man without a shade of vanity or nonsense
Yes he has very pleasant unaffected manners
I am sure he will do credit to his estate It is a very handsome fortune is it not
It is a very large property
I am glad of it I have no doubt we shall see him one of the first men of his time
These words brought into contrast in Philips mind the difference between Guys position and his own The mere possession of wealth was winning for Guy at an age when his merits could only be negative that estimation which his own tried character had scarcely achieved placing him not merely on a level with himself but in a situation where happiness and influence came unbidden His own talents attainments and equal if not superior claims to gentle blood could not procure him what seemed to lie at Guys feet His own ability and Lauras heart alone were what wealth could not affect yet when he thought how the want of it wasted the one and injured the hopes of the other he recurred to certain visions of his sister Margarets in days gone by of what he was to do as Sir Philip lord of Redclyffe He was speculating on what would have happened had Guy died in his sickly infancy when suddenly recollecting himself he turned his mind to other objects
Guy was not much charmed with Mrs Deanes invitation He said he knew he must go to make up for his rudeness about the ball but he grumbled enough to make Mrs Edmonstone laugh at him for being so stupid as to want to stay humdrum in the chimney corner No doubt it was very pleasant there There was that peculiar snugness which belongs to a remnant of a large party when each member of it feels bound to prevent the rest from being dull Guy devoted himself to Charles more than ever and in the fear that he might miss the late variety of amusement exerted even more of his powers of entertainment than Lady Eveleen had called forth
There were grave readings in the mornings and long walks in the afternoons when he dragged Charles in his chair into many a place he had never expected to see again and enabled him to accompany his mother and sisters in many a delightful expedition In the evening there was music or light reading especially poetry as this was encouraged by Mrs Edmonstone in the idea that it was better that so excitable and enthusiastic a person as Guy should have his objects of admiration tested by Charless love of ridicule
Mr Edmonstone had left to Guy the office of keeping the 1st of September one which he greatly relished Indeed when he thought of his own deserted manors he was heard to exclaim in commiseration for the neglect Poor partridges The Hollywell shooting was certainly not like that at Redclyffe where he could hardly walk out of his own grounds whereas here he had to bear in mind so many boundaries that Philip was expecting to have to help him out of some direful scrape He had generally walked over the whole extent and assured himself that the birds were very wild and Bustle the best of dogs before breakfast so as to be ready for all the occupations of the day He could scarcely be grateful when the neighbours thinking it must be very dull for him to be left alone with Mrs Edmonstone and her crippled son used to ask him to shoot or dine He always lamented at first and ended by enjoying himself
One night he came home in such a state of eagerness that he must needs tell his good news and finding no one in the drawingroom he ran upstairs opened Charless door and exclaimed—Theres to be a concert at Broadstone Then perceiving that Charles was fast asleep he retreated noiselessly reserving his rejoicings till morning when it appeared that Charles had heard but had woven the announcement into a dream
This concert filled Guys head His only grief was that it was to be in the evening so that Charles could not go to it and his wonder was not repressed at finding that Philip did not mean to favour it with his presence since Guy would suffice for squire to Mrs Edmonstone and her daughters
In fact Philip was somewhat annoyed by the perpetual conversation about the concert and on the day on which it was to take place resolved on making a long expedition to visit the ruins of an old abbey far out of all reports of it As he was setting out he was greeted in a very loud voice by Mr Gordon
Hollo Morville how are you So you have great doings tonight I hear and he had only just forced himself from him when he was again accosted this time in a hasty embarrassed manner—
I beg your pardon sir but the ties of relationship—
He drew himself up as if he was on parade faced round and replied with an emphatic Sir as he behold a thin foreignlooking man in a somewhat flashy style of dress who bowing low repeated breathlessly—
I beg your pardon—Sir Guy Morville I believe
Captain Morville sir
I beg your pardon—I mistook A thousand pardons and he retreated while Philip after a moments wonder pursued his walk
The Hollywell party entered Broadstone in a very different temper and greatly did they enjoy the concert both for themselves and for each other In the midst of it while Amy was intent on the Italian words of a song Guy touched her hand and pointed to a line in the programme—
Solo on the violin MR S B DIXON
She looked up in his face with an expression full of inquiry but it was no time for speaking and she only saw how the colour mantled on his cheek when the violinist appeared and how he looked down the whole time of the performance only now and then venturing a furtive though earnest glance
He did not say anything till they were seated in the carriage and then astonished Mrs Edmonstone by exclaiming—
It must be my uncle—I am sure it must Ill ride to Broadstone the first thing tomorrow and find him out
Your uncle exclaimed Mrs Edmonstone I never thought of that
S B Dixon said Guy I know his name is Sebastian It cannot be any one else You know he went to America How curious it is I suppose there is no fear of his being gone before I can come in tomorrow
I should think not Those musical people keep late hours
I would go before breakfast Perhaps it would be best to go to old Redford he will know all about him or to the musicshop I am so glad It is the very thing I always wished
Did you said Mrs Edmonstone to herself I cant say every one would be of your mind but I cant help liking you the better for it I wish the man had kept further off I wish Mr Edmonstone was at home I hope no harm will come of it I wonder what I ought to do Shall I caution him No I dont think I can spoil his happiness—and perhaps the man may be improved He is his nearest relation and I have no right to interfere His own good sense will protect him—but I wish Mr Edmonstone was at home
She therefore did not check his expressions of delight nor object to his going to Broadstone early the next morning He had just dismounted before the innyard when a boy put a note into his hand and he was so absorbed in its contents that he did not perceive Philip till after two greetings had passed unheard When at length he was recalled he started and exclaimed rapturously as he put the note into his cousins hand
See here—it is himself
Who
My uncle My poor mothers own brother
Sebastian Bach Dixon read Philip Ha it was he who took me for you yesterday
I saw him at the concert—I was sure it could be no other I came in on purpose to find him and here he is waiting for me Is not it a happy chance
Happy echoed Philip in a far different tone
How I have longed for this—for any one who could remember and tell me of her—of my mother—my poor dear young mother And her own brother I have been thinking of it all night and he knows I am here and is as eager as myself He is waiting for me ended Guy hurrying off
Stop said Philip gravely Think before acting I seriously advise you to have nothing to do with this man at least personally Let me see him and learn what he wants
He wants me impatiently answered Guy You are not his nephew
Thank heaven thought Philip Do you imagine your relationship is the sole cause of his seeking you
I dont know—I dont care cried Guy with vehemence I will not listen to suspicions of my mothers brother
It is more than suspicion Hear me calmly I speak for your good I know this mans influence was fatal to your father I know he did all in his power to widen the breach with your grandfather
That was eighteen years ago said Guy walking on biting his lip in a fiery fit of impatience
You will not hear Remember that his position and associates render him no fit companion for you Nay listen patiently You cannot help the relationship I would not have you do otherwise than assist him Let him not complain of neglect but be on your guard He will either seriously injure you or be a burden for life
I have heard you so far—I can hear no more said Guy no longer restraining his impetuosity He is my uncle that I know I care for nothing else Position—nonsense what has that to do with it I will not be set against him
He strode off but in a few moments turned back overtook Philip said— Thank you for your advice I beg your pardon for my hastiness You mean kindly but I must see my uncle And without waiting for an answer he was gone
In short space he was in the little parlour of the musicshop shaking hands with his uncle and exclaiming—
I am so glad I hoped it was you
It is very noblehearted I might have known it would be so with the son of my dearest sister and of my generous friend cried Mr Dixon with eagerness that had a theatrical air though it was genuine feeling that filled his eyes with tears
I saw your name last night continued Guy I would have tried to speak to you at once but I was obliged to stay with Mrs Edmonstone as I was the only gentleman with her
Ah I thought it possible you might not be able to follow the dictate of your own heart but this is a fortunate conjuncture in the absence of your guardian
Guy recollected Philips remonstrance and it crossed him whether his guardian might be of the same mind but he felt confident in having told all to Mrs Edmonstone
How did you know I was here he asked
I learnt it in a most gratifying way Mr Redford without knowing our connection—for on that I will always be silent—mentioned that the finest tenor he had ever known in an amateur belonged to his pupil Sir Guy Morville You can imagine my feelings at finding you so near and learning that you had inherited your dear mothers talent and taste
The conversation was long for there was much to hear Mr Dixon had kept up a correspondence at long intervals with Markham from whom he heard that his sisters child survived and was kindly treated by his grandfather and inquiring again on the death of old Sir Guy learnt that he was gone to live with his guardian whose name and residence Markham had not thought fit to divulge He had been much rejoiced to hear his name from the musicmaster and he went on to tell how he had been misled by the name of Morville into addressing the captain who had a good deal of general resemblance to Guys father a fine tall young man of the same upright proud deportment He supposed he was the son of the Archdeacon and remembering how strongly his own proceedings had been discountenanced at Stylehurst had been much disconcerted and deeming the encounter a bad omen had used more caution in his advances to his nephew It was from sincere affection that he sought his acquaintance though very doubtful as to the reception he might meet and was both delighted and surprised at such unembarrassed openhearted affection
The uncle and nephew were not made to understand each other Sebastian Dixon was a man of little education and when in early youth his talents had placed him high in his own line he had led a careless extravagant life Though an evil friend and fatal counsellor he had been truly attached to Guys father and the secret engagement and runaway marriage with his beautiful sister had been the romance of his life promoted by him with no selfish end He was a proud and passionate man and resenting Sir Guys refusal to receive his sister as a daughter almost as much as Sir Guy was incensed at the marriage had led his brotherinlaw to act in a manner which cut off the hope of reconciliation and obliged Archdeacon Morville to give up his cause He had gloried in supporting his sister and her husband and enabling them to set the old baronet at defiance But young Morvilles territorial pride could not brook that he should be maintained and especially that his child the heir of Redclyffe should be born while he was living at the expense of a musician This feeling aided by a yearning for home and a secret love for his father mastered his resentment he took his resolution quarrelled with Dixon and carried off his wife bent with desperation on forcing his father into receiving her
Sebastian had not surmounted his anger at this step when he learnt its fatal consequences Ever since that time nothing had prospered with him he had married and sunk himself lower and though he had an excellent engagement the days were past when he was the fashion and his gains and his triumphs were not what they had been He had a long list of disappointments and jealousies with which to entertain Guy who on his side though resolved to like him and dreading to be too refined to be friends with his relations could not feel as thoroughly pleased as he intended to have been
Music was however a subject on which they could meet with equal enthusiasm and by means of this together with the aid of his own imagination Guy contrived to be very happy He stayed with his uncle as long as he could and promised to spend a day with him in London on his way to Oxford in October
The next morning when Philip knew that Guy would be with his tutor he walked to Hollywell came straight up to his aunts dressingroom asked her to send Charlotte down to practise and seating himself opposite to her began—
What do you mean to do about this unfortunate rencontre
Do you mean Guy and his uncle He is very much pleased poor boy I like his entire freedom from false shame
A little true shame would be hardly misplaced about such a connection
It is not his fault and I hope it will not be his misfortune said Mrs Edmonstone
That it will certainly be replied Philip if we are not on our guard and indeed if we are there is little to be done with one so wilful I might as well have interfered with the course of a whirlwind
No no Philip he is too candid to be wilful
I cannot be of your opinion when I have seen him rushing into this acquaintance in spite of the warnings he must have had here—to say nothing of myself
Nay there I must defend him though you will think me very unwise I could not feel that I ought to withhold him from taking some notice of so near a relation
Philip did think her so unwise that he could only reply gravely—
We must hope it may produce no evil effects
How she exclaimed much alarmed Have you heard anything against him
You remember of course that Guys father was regularly the victim of this Dixon
Yes yes but he has had enough to sober him Do you know nothing more said Mrs Edmonstone growing nervously anxious lest she had been doing wrong in her husbands absence
I have been inquiring about him from old Redford and I should judge him to be a most dangerous companion as indeed I could have told from his whole air which is completely that of a roué
You have seen him then
Yes He paid me the compliment of taking me for Sir Guy and of course made off in dismay when he discovered on whom he had fallen I have seldom seen a less creditablelooking individual
But what did Mr Redford say Did he know of the connection
No I am happy to say he did not The fellow has decency enough not to boast of that Well Redford did not know much of him personally he said he had once been much thought of and had considerable talent and execution but taste changes or he has lost something so that though he stands tolerably high in his profession he is not a leader So much for his musical reputation As to his character he is one of those people who are called no ones enemy but their own exactly the introduction Guy has hitherto happily wanted to every sort of mischief
I think said Mrs Edmonstone trying to console herself that Guy is too much afraid of small faults to be invited by larger evils While he punishes himself for an idle word he is not likely to go wrong in greater matters
Not at present
Is the man in debt or difficulties Guy heard nothing of that and I thought it a good sign
I dont suppose he is He ought not for he has a fixed salary besides what he gets by playing at concerts when it is not the London season The wasting money on a spendthrift relation would be a far less evil than what I apprehend
I wish I knew what to do It is very unlucky that your uncle is from home
Very
Mrs Edmonstone was frightened by the sense of responsibility and was only anxious to catch hold of something to direct her
What would you have me do she asked hopelessly
Speak seriously to Guy He must attend to you he cannot fly out with a woman as he does with me Show him the evils that must result from such an intimacy If Dixon was in distress I would not say a word for he would be bound to assist him but as it is the acquaintance can serve no purpose but degrading Guy and showing him the way to evil Above all make a point of his giving up visiting him in London That is the sure road to evil A youth of his age under the conduct of a wornout roué connected with the theatres I can hardly imagine anything more mischievous
Yes yes I will speak to him said Mrs Edmonstone perfectly appalled
She promised but she found the fulfilment difficult in her dislike of vexing Guy her fear of saying what was wrong and a doubt whether the appearance of persecuting Mr Dixon was not the very way to prevent Guys own good sense from finding out his true character so she waited hoping Mr Edmonstone might return before Guy went to Oxford or that he might write decisively
Mrs Edmonstone might have known her husband better than to expect him to write decisively when he had neither herself nor Philip at his elbow The same post had brought him a letter from Guy mentioning his meeting with his uncle and frankly explaining his plans for London another from Philip calling on him to use all his authority to prevent this intercourse and a third from his wife Bewildered between them he took them to his sister who being as puzzleheaded as himself and only hearing his involved history of the affair confused him still more so he wrote to Philip saying he was sorry the fellow had turned up but he would guard against him He told Guy he was sorry to say that his uncle used to be a sad scamp and he must take care or it would be his poor fathers story over again and to Mrs Edmonstone he wrote that it was very odd that everything always did go wrong when he was away
He thought these letters a great achievement but his wifes perplexity was not materially relieved
After considering a good while she at length spoke to Guy but it was not at a happy time for Philip despairing of her had just taken on himself to remonstrate and had angered him to the verge of an outbreak
Mrs Edmonstone as mildly as she could urged on him that such intercourse could bring him little satisfaction and might be very inconvenient that his uncle was in no distress and did not require assistance and that it was too probable that in seeking him out he might meet with persons who might unsettle his principles—in short that he had much better give up the visit to London
This is Philips advice said Guy
It is but—
Guy looked impatient and she paused
You must forgive me he said if I follow my own judgment If Mr Edmonstone chose to lay his commands on me I suppose I must submit but I cannot see that I am bound to obey Philip
Not to obey certainly but his advice—
He is prejudiced and unjust said Guy
I dont believe that my uncle would attempt to lead me into bad company and surely you would not have me neglect or look coldly on one who was so much attached to my parents If he is not a gentleman and is looked down on by the world it is not for his sisters son to make him conscious of it
I like your feelings Guy I can say nothing against it but that I am much afraid your uncle is not highly principled
You have only Philips account of him
You are resolved
Yes I do not like not to take your advice but I do believe this is my duty I do not think my determination is made in selfwill said Guy thoughtfully I cannot think that I ought to neglect my uncle because I happen to have been born in a different station which is all I have heard proved against him he added smiling You will forgive me will you not for not following your advice for really and truly if you will let me say so I think you would not have given it if Philip had not been talking to you
Mrs Edmonstone confessed with a smile that perhaps it was so but said she trusted much to Philips knowledge of the world Guy agreed to this though still declaring Philip had no right to set him against his uncle and there the discussion ended
Guy went to London Philip thought him very wilful and his aunt very weak and Mr Edmonstone on coming home said it could not be helped and he wished to hear no more about the matter
CHAPTER 12
Her playful smile her buoyance wild
Bespeak the gentle mirthful child
But in her foreheads broad expanse
Her chastened tones her thoughtful glance
Is mingled with the childs light glee
The modest maidens dignity
One summers day two years after the ball and review Mary Ross and her father were finishing their early dinner when she said—
If you dont want me this afternoon papa I think I shall walk to Hollywell You know Eveleen de Courcy is there
No I did not What has brought her
As Charles expresses it she has overpolked herself in London and is sent here for quiet and country air I want to call on her and to ask Sir Guy to give me some idea as to the singing the children should practise for the schoolfeast
Then you think Sir Guy will come to the feast
I reckon on him to conceal all the deficiencies in the childrens singing
He wont desert you as he did Mrs Brownlow
O papa you surely did not think him to blame in that affair
Honestly Mary if I thought about the matter at all I thought it a pity he should go so much to the Brownlows
I believe I could tell you the history if you thought it worth while and though it may be gossip I should like you to do justice to Sir Guy
Very well though I dont think there is much danger of my doing otherwise I only wondered he should become intimate there at all
I believe Mrs Edmonstone thinks it right he should see as much of the world as possible and not be always at home in their own set
Fair and proper
You know she has shown him all the people she could—had Eveleen staying there and the Miss Nortons and hunted him out to parties when he had rather have been at home
I thought he was fond of society I remember your telling me how amused you were with his enjoyment of his first ball
Ah he was two years younger then and all was new He seems to me too deep and sensitive not to find more pain than pleasure in commonplace society I have sometimes seen that he cannot speak either lightly or harshly of what he disapproves and people dont understand him I was once sitting next him when there was some talking going on about an elopement he did not laugh looked almost distressed and at last said in a very low voice to me I wish people would not laugh about such things
He is an extraordinary mixture of gaiety of heart and seriousness
Well when Mrs Brownlow had her nieces with her and was giving those musical parties his voice made him valuable and Mrs Edmonstone told him he ought to go to them I believe he liked it at first but he found there was no end to it it took up a great deal of time and was a style of thing altogether that was not desirable Mrs Edmonstone thought at first his reluctance was only shyness and stayathome nonsense that ought to be overcome but when she had been there and saw how Mrs Brownlow beset him and the unpleasant fuss they made about his singing she quite came round to his mind and was very sorry she had exposed him to so much that was disagreeable
Well Mary I am glad to hear your account My impression arose from something Philip Morville said
Captain Morville never can approve of anything Sir Guy does It is not like Charles
How improved Charles Edmonstone is He has lost that spirit of repining and sarcasm and lives as if he had an object.'
Yes he employs himself now and teaches Amy to do the same You know after the governess went we were afraid little Amy would never do anything but wait on Charles and idle in her pretty gentle way but when he turned to better things so did she and her mind has been growing all this time Perhaps you dont see it for she has not lost her likeness to a kitten and looks all demure silence with the elders but she takes in what the wise say
She is a very good little thing and I dare say will not be the worse for growing up slowly
Those two sisters are specimens of fast and slow growth Laura has always seemed to be so much more than one year older than Amy especially of late She is more like fiveandtwenty than twenty I wonder if she overworks herself But how we have lingered over our dinner
By halfpast three Mary was entering a copse which led into Mr Edmonstones field when she heard gay tones and a snatch of one of the sweetest of old songs—
Weep no more lady lady weep no more
Thy sorrow is in vain
For violets pluckd the sweetest showers
Will neer make grow again
A merry clear laugh followed and a turn in the path showed her Guy Amy and Charlotte busy over a sturdy stock of eglantine Guy little changed in these two years—not much taller and more agile than robust—was lopping vigorously with his great pruningknife Amabel nursing a bundle of drooping rose branches Charlotte her bonnet in a garland of wild sweetbrier holding the matting and continually getting entangled in the long thorny wreaths
And here comes the friar of orders gray to tell you so exclaimed Guy as Mary in her gray dress came on them
Oh that is right dear good friar cried Amy
We are so busy said Charlotte Guy has made Mr Markham send all these choice buds from Redclyffe
Not from the park said Guy we dont deal much in gardening but Markham is a great florist and these are his bounties
And are you cutting that beautiful wild rose to pieces
Is it not a pity said Amy We have used up all the stocks in the garden and this is to be transplanted in the autumn
She has been consoling it all the time by telling it it is for its good said Guy cutting off wild shoots and putting in better things
I never said anything so pretty and after all I dont know that the grand roses will be equal to these purple shoots and blushing buds with long whiskers
So Sir Guy was singing about the violets plucked to comfort you But you must not leave off I want to see how you do it I am gardener enough to like to look on
We have only two more to put in
Knife and fingers were busy and Mary admired the dexterity with which the slit was made in the green bark well armed with firm red thorns and the tiny scarlet gem inserted and bound with cotton and matting At the least critical parts of the work she asked after the rest of the party and was answered that papa had driven Charles out in the pony carriage and that Laura and Eveleen were sitting on the lawn reading and working with mamma Eveleen was better but not strong or equal to much exertion in the heat Mary went on to speak of her school feast and ask her questions
O Guy you must not go before that cried Charlotte
Are you going away
He is very naughty indeed said Charlotte He is going I dont know where all to be stupid and read mathematics
A true bill I am sorry to say said Guy I am to join a readingparty for the latter part of the vacation
I hope not before Thursday week though we are not asking you to anything worth staying for
Oh surely you need not go before that said Amy need you
No I believe I may stay till Friday and I should delight in the feast thank you Miss Ross—I want to study such things A bit more matting Amy if you please There I think that will do
Excellently Here is its name See how neatly Charlie has printed it Mary Is it not odd that he prints so well when he writes so badly
The Seven Sisters There fair sisterhood grow and thrive till I come to transplant you in the autumn Are there any more
No that is the last Now Mary let us come to mamma
Guy waited to clear the path of the numerous trailing briery branches and the others walked on Amy telling how sorry they were to lose Guys vacation but that he thought he could not give time enough to his studies here and had settled at Oxford to make one of a readingparty under the tutorship of his friend Mr Wellwood
Where do they go
It is not settled Guy wished it to be the seaside but Philip has been recommending a farmhouse in Stylehurst parish rather nearer St Mildreds Wells than Stylehurst but quite out in the moor and an immense way from both
Do you think it will be the place
Yes Guy thinks it would suit Mr Wellwood because he has friends at St Mildreds so he gave his vote for it He expects to hear how it is settled today or tomorrow
Coming out on the lawn they found the three ladies sitting under the acacia with their books and work Laura did indeed look older than her real age as much above twenty as Amy looked under nineteen She was prettier than ever her complexion exquisite in delicacy her fine figure and the perfect outline of her features more developed but the change from girl to woman had passed over her and set its stamp on the anxious blue eye and almost oppressed brow Mary thought it would be hard to define where was that difference It was not want of bloom for of that Laura had more than any of the others fresh healthy and bright while Amy was always rather pale and Lady Eveleen was positively wan and faded by London and late hours nor was it loss of animation for Laura talked and laughed with interest and eagerness nor was it thought for little Amy when at rest wore a meditative pensive countenance but there was something either added or taken away which made it appear that the serenity and carelessness of early youth had fled from her and the air of the cares of life had come over her
Mary told her plans—Church service at four followed by a teadrinking in the fields tea in the garden for the company and play for the school children and all who liked to join them Every one likes such festivals which have the recommendation of permitting all to do as they please bringing friends together in perfect ease and freedom with an object that raises them above the rank of mere gatherings for the pleasure of rich neighbours
Mrs Edmonstone gladly made the engagement and Lady Eveleen promised to be quite well and to teach the children all manner of new games though she greatly despised the dullness of English children and had many droll stories of the stupidity of Lauras pupils communicated to her with perhaps a little exaggeration by Charles and still further embellished by herself for the purpose of exciting Charlottes indignation
Mary proceeded to her consultation about the singing and was conducted by Guy and Amy to the piano and when her ears could not be indoctrinated by their best efforts they more than half engaged to walk to Easthill and have a conversation with the new schoolmaster whom Mary pitied for having fallen on people so unable to appreciate his musical training as herself and her father The whole party walked back with her as far as the shade lasted and at the end of the next field she turned saw them standing round the stile thought what happy people they were and then resumed her wonder whither Lauras youthfulness had flown
The situation of Philip and Laura had not changed His regiment had never been at any great distance from Hollywell and he often came venturing more as Laura learnt to see him with less trepidation He seldom or never was alone with her but his influence was as strong as ever and look word and gesture which she alone could understand told her what she was to him and revealed his thoughts To him she was devoted all her doings were with a view to please him and deserve his affection he was her world and sole object Indeed she was sometimes startled by perceiving that tenderly as she loved her own family all were subordinate to him She had long since known the true name of her feelings for him she could not tell when or how the certainty had come but she was conscious that it was love that they had acknowledged for one another and that she only lived in the light of his love Still she did not realize the evil of concealment it was so deep a sensation of her innermost heart that she never could imagine revealing it to any living creature and she had besides so surrendered her judgment to her idol that no thought could ever cross her that he had enjoined what was wrong Her heart and soul were his alone and she left the future to him without an independent desire or reflection All the embarrassments and discomforts which her secret occasioned her were met willingly for his sake and these were not a few though time had given her more selfcommand or perhaps more properly speaking had hardened her
She always had a dread of teteatetes and conversations over novels and these were apt to be unavoidable when Eveleen was at Hollywell The twilight wanderings on the terrace were a daily habit and Eveleen almost always paired with her On this evening in particular Laura was made very uncomfortable by Eveleens declaring that it was positively impossible and unnatural that the good heroine of some novel should have concealed her engagement from her parents Laura could not help saying that there might be many excuses then afraid that she was exciting suspicion changed the subject in great haste and tried to make Eveleen come indoors telling her she would tire herself to death and vexed by her cousins protestations that the fresh cool air did her good Besides Eveleen was looking with attentive eyes at another pair who were slowly walking up and down the shady walk that bordered the grassplot and now and then standing still to enjoy the subdued silence of the summer evening and the few distant sounds that marked the perfect lull
How calm—how beautiful murmured Amabel
It only wants the low solemn surge and ripple of the tide and its dash on the rocks said Guy If ever there was music it is there but it makes one think what the ear must be that can take in the whole of those harmonics
How I should like to hear it
And see it O Amy to show you the sunny sea—the sense of breadth and vastness in that pale clear horizon line and the infinite number of fields of light between you and it—and the free feelings as you stand on some high crag the wind blowing in your face across half the globe and the waves dashing far below I am growing quite thirsty for the sea
You know papa said something about your taking your readingparty to Redclyffe
True but I dont think Markham would like it and it would put old Mrs Drew into no end of a fuss
Not like to have you
O yes I should be all very well but if they heard I was bringing three or four men with me they would think them regular wild beasts They would be in an awful fright Besides it is so long since I have been at home that I dont altogether fancy going there till I settle there for good
Ah it will be sad going there at first
And it has not been my duty yet
But you will be glad when you get there
Shant I I wonder if any one has been to shoot the rabbits on the shag rock They must have quite overrun it by this time But I dont like the notion of the first day There is not only the great change but a stranger at the vicarage
Do you know anything about the new clergyman I believe Mrs Ashford is a connection of Lady Thorndales
Yes Thorndale calls them pattern people and I have no doubt they will do great good in the parish I am sure we want some enlightenment for we are a most primitive race and something beyond Jenny Robinsons dame school would do us no harm
Here Mr Edmonstone called from the window that they must come in
Mrs Edmonstone thought deeply that night She had not forgotten her notion that Eveleen was attracted by Guys manners and had been curious to see what would happen when Eveleen was sent to Hollywell for country air
She had a very good opinion of Lady Eveleen Since the former visit she had shown more spirit of improvement and laid aside many little follies she had put herself under Lauras guidance and tamed down into what gave the promise of a sensible woman more than anything that had hitherto been observed in her and little addicted to matchmaking as Mrs Edmonstone was she could not help thinking that Eva was almost worthy of her dear Guy she never could expect to find anyone she should think quite worthy of him he was too like one of her own children for that and on the other hand how delighted Lord and Lady Kilcoran would be It was a very pretty castle in the air but in the midst of it the notion suddenly darted into Mrs Edmonstones head that while she was thinking of it it was Amy not Eveleen who was constantly with Guy Reading and music roses botany and walks on the terrace She looked back and it was still the same Last Easter vacation how they used to study the stars in the evening to linger in the greenhouse in the morning nursing the geraniums and to practise singing over the schoolroom piano how in a long walk they always paired together and how they seemed to share every pursuit or pleasure
Now Mrs Edmonstone was extremely fond of Guy and trusted him entirely but she thought she ought to consider how far this should be allowed Feeling that he ought to see more of the world she had sent him as much as she could into society but it had only made him cling closer to home Still he was but twenty it was only a country neighbourhood and there was much more for him to see before he could fairly be supposed to know his own mind She knew he would act honourably but she had a horror of letting him entangle himself with her daughter before he was fairly able to judge of his own feelings Or if this was only behaving with a brothers freedom and confidence Mrs Edmonstone felt it was not safe for her poor little Amy who might learn so to depend on him as to miss him grievously when this intimacy ceased as it must when he settled at his own home It would be right while it was still time to make her remember that they were not brother and sister and by checking their present happy careless confidential intercourse to save her from the chill which seemed to have been cast on Laura Mrs Edmonstone was the more anxious because she deeply regretted not having been sufficiently watchful in Lauras case and perhaps she felt an unacknowledged conviction that if there was real love on Guys part it would not be hurt by a little reserve on Amys Yet to have to speak to her little innocent daughter on such a matter disturbed her so much that she could hardly have set about it if Amy had not at that very moment knocked at her door
My dear what has kept you up so late
We have been sitting in Eveleens room mamma hearing about her London life and then we began to settle our plans for tomorrow and I came to ask what you think of them You know Guy has promised to go and hear the Easthill singing and we were proposing if you did not mind it to take the ponycarriage and the donkey and go in the morning to Easthill have luncheon and get Mary to go with us to the top of the great down where we have never been Guy has been wanting us for a long time past to go and see the view and saying there is a track quite smooth enough to drive Charlie to the top
Amy wondered at her mothers look of hesitation In fact the scheme was so accordant with their usual habits that it was impossible to find any objection yet it all hinged on Guy and the appointment at Easthill might lead to a great many more
Do you wish us to do anything else mamma We dont care about it
No my dear said Mrs Edmonstone I see no reason against it But— and she felt as if she was making a desperate plunge there is something I want to say to you
Amy stood ready to hear but Mrs Edmonstone paused Another effort and she spoke—
Amy my dear I dont wish to find fault but I thought of advising you to take care About Guy—
The very brilliant pink which instantly overspread Amys face made her mother think her warning more expedient
You have been spending a great deal of time with him of late very sensibly and pleasantly I know I dont blame you at all my dear so you need not look distressed I only want you to be careful You know though we call him cousin he is scarcely a relation at all
O mamma dont go on said poor little Amy hurriedly indeed I am very sorry
For Amy understood that it was imputed to her that she had been forward and unmaidenly Mrs Edmonstone saw her extreme distress and grieved at the pain she had inflicted tried to reassure her as much as might be safe
Indeed my dear you have done nothing amiss I only intended to tell you to be cautious for fear you should get into a way of going on which might not look well Dont make any great difference I only meant that there should not be quite so much singing and gardening alone with him or walking in the garden in the evening You can manage to draw back a little so as to keep more with me or with Laura and I think that will be the best way
Every word no matter what increased the burning of poor Amys cheeks A broad accusation of flirting would have been less distressing to many girls than this mild and delicate warning was to one of such shrinking modesty and maidenly feeling She had a sort of consciousness that she enjoyed partaking in his pursuits and this made her sense of confusion and shame overwhelming What had she been thoughtlessly doing She could not speak she could not look Her mother put her arm round her and Amy hid her head on her shoulder and held her fast Mrs Edmonstone kissed and caressed the little fluttering bird then saying Good night my own dear child unloosed her embrace
Good night dear mamma whispered Amy I am very sorry
You need not be sorry my dear only be careful Good night And it would be hard to say whether the mother or the daughter had the hottest cheeks
Poor little Amy what was her dismay as she asked herself again and again what she had been doing and what she was to do The last was plain—she knew what was right and do it she must There would be an end of much that was pleasant and a fresh glow came over her as she owned how very very pleasant but if it was not quite the thing—if mamma did not approve so it must be True all her doings received their zest from Guy—her heart bounded at the very sound of his whistle she always heard his words through all the din of a whole party—nothing was complete without him nothing good without his without his approval—but so much the more shame for her It was a kind of seeking him which was of all things the most shocking So there should be an end of it—never mind the rest Amy knelt down and prayed that she might keep her resolution
She did not know how much of her severity towards herself was learned from the example that had been two years before her Nor did she think whether the seeking had been mutual she imagined it all her own doing and did not guess that she would give pain to Guy by withdrawing herself from him
The morning gave vigour to her resolution and when Laura came to ask what mamma thought of their project Amy looked confused—said she did not know—she believed it would not do But just then in came her mother to say she had been considering of the expedition and meant to join it herself Amy understood blushed and was silently grateful
When Laura wanted to alter her demeanour towards Guy being perfectly cool and not in the least conscious she had acted with great judgment seen exactly what to do and what to leave undone so as to keep up appearances But it was not so with Amy She was afraid of herself and was in extremes She would not come down till the last moment that there might be no talking in the window She hardly spoke at breakfasttime and adhered closely to Laura and Eveleen when they wandered in the garden Presently Charles looked out from the dressingroom window calling—
Amy Guy is ready to read
I cant come Read without me she answered hoping Charlie would not be vexed and feeling her face light up again
The hour for the expedition came and Amy set off walking with Laura because Guy was with Mrs Edmonstone but presently after holding open a gate for Charlotte who was on the donkey he came up to the sisters and joined in the conversation Amy saw something in the hedge—a foxglove she believed—it would have done as well if it had been a nettle—she stopped to gather it hoping to fall behind them but they waited for her She grew silent but Guy appealed to her She ran on to Charlotte and her donkey but at the next gate Guy had joined company again At last she put herself under her mothers wing and by keeping with her did pretty well all the time she was at Easthill But when they went on she was riding the donkey and it as donkeys always are was resolved on keeping ahead of the walkers so that as Guy kept by her side it was a more absolute teteatete than ever
At the top of the hill they found a fine view rich and extensive broad woods fields waving with silvery barley trim meadows fair hazy blue distance and a dim line of sea beyond This as Amy knew was Guys delight and further what she would not tell herself was that he chiefly cared for showing it to her It was so natural to call him to admire everything beautiful and ask if it was equal to Redclyffe that she found herself already turning to him to participate in his pleasure as he pointed out all that was to be seen but she recollected blushed and left her mother to speak He had much to show There was a hanging wood on one side of the hill whence he had brought her more than one botanical prize and she must now visit their native haunts It was too great a scramble for Mrs Edmonstone with all her good will Eveleen was to be kept still and not to tire herself Laura did not care for botany nor love brambles and Amy was obliged to stand and look into the wood saying No thank you I dont think I can and then run back to Mary and Charles while Charlotte was loudly calling out that it was delightful fun and that she was very stupid In another minute Guy had overtaken her and in his gentle persuasive voice was telling her it was very easy and she must come and see the birdsnest orchises She would have liked it above all things but she thought it very kind of Guy not to seem angry when she said No thank you
Mary after what she had seen yesterday could not guess at the real reason or she would have come with her but she thought Amy was tired and would rather not Poor Amy was tired very tired before the walk was over but her weary looks made it worse for Guy offered her his arm No thank you she said I am getting on very well and she trudged on resolutely for her mother was in the carriage and to lag behind the others would surely make him keep with her
Mrs Edmonstone was very sorry for her fatigue but Amy found it a good excuse for not wandering in the garden or joining in the music It had been a very uncomfortable day she hoped she had done right at any rate she had the peaceful conviction of having tried to do so
The next day Amy was steady to her resolution No reading with the two youths though Charles scolded her sitting in her room till Guy was gone out going indoors as soon as she heard him return and in the evening staying with Charles when her sisters and cousins went out but this did not answer for Guy came and sat by them She moved away as soon as possible but the more inclined she was to linger the more she thought she ought to go so murmuring something about looking for Laura she threw on her scarf and sprung to the window Her muslin caught on the bolt she turned Guy was already disentangling it and she met his eye It was full of anxious pleading inquiry which to her seemed upbraiding and not knowing what to do she exclaimed hurriedly Thank you no harm done and darted into the garden frightened to feel her face glowing and her heart throbbing She could not help looking back to see if he was following No he was not attempting it he was leaning against the window and on she hastened the perception dawning on her that she was hurting him he might think her rude unkind capricious he who had always been so kind to her and when he was going away so soon But it is right it must be done said little Amy to herself standing still now that she was out of sight If I was wrong before I must bear it now and he will see the rights of it sooner or later The worst of all would be my not doing the very most right to please any body Besides he cant really care for missing silly little Amy when he has mamma and Charlie And he is going away so it will be easier to begin right when he comes back Be that as it may it must be done Ill get Charlie to tell me what he was saying about the painted glass
CHAPTER 13
Oh thou child of many prayers
Life hath quicksands—life hath snares—
Care and age come unawares
Like the swell of some sweet tune
Morning rises into noon
May glides onward into June
—Longfellow
What is the matter with Amy What makes her so odd asked Charles as his mother came to wish him good night
Poor little dear dont take any notice was all the answer he received and seeing that he was to be told no more he held his peace
Laura understood without being told She too had thought Guy and Amy were a great deal together and combining various observations she perceived that her mother must have given Amy a caution She therefore set herself like a good sister to shelter Amy as much as she could save her from awkward situations and above all to prevent her altered manner from being remarked This was the less difficult as Eveleen was subdued and languid and more inclined to lie on the sofa and read than to look out for mirth
As to poor little Amy her task was in one way become less hard for Guy had ceased to haunt her and seemed to make it his business to avoid all that could cause her embarrassment but in another way it hurt her much more for she now saw the pain she was causing If obliged to do anything for her he would give a look as if to ask pardon and then her rebellious heart would so throb with joy as to cause her dismay at having let herself fall into so hateful a habit as wishing to attract attention What a struggle it was not to obey the impulse of turning to him for the smile with which he would greet anything in conversation that interested them both and how wrong she thought it not to be more consoled when she saw him talking to Eveleen or to any of the others as if he was doing very well without her This did not often happen he was evidently out of spirits and thoughtful and Amy was afraid some storm might be gathering respecting Mr Sebastian Dixon about whom there always seemed to be some uncomfortable mystery
Mrs Edmonstone saw everything and said nothing She was very sorry for them both but she could not interfere and could only hope she had done right and protected Amy as far as she was able She was vexed now and then to see Eveleen give knowing smiles and significant glances feared that she guessed what was going on and wondered whether to give her a hint not to add to Amys confusion but her great dislike to enter on such a subject prevailed and she left things to take their course thinking that for once Guys departure would be a relief
The approach of anything in the shape of a party of pleasure was one of the best cures for Eveleens ailments and the evening before Marys teadrinking she was in high spirits laughing and talking a great deal and addressing herself chiefly to Guy He exerted himself to answer but it did not come with life and spirit his countenance did not light up and at last Eveleen said Ah I see I am a dreadful bore Ill go away and leave you to repose
Lady Eveleen he exclaimed in consternation what have I been doing—what have I been thinking of
Nay that is best known to yourself though I think perhaps I could divine said she with that archness and grace that always seemed to remove the unfavourable impression that her proceedings might have given Shall I
No no he answered colouring crimson and then trying to laugh off his confusion and find some answer but without success and Eveleen perceiving her aunts eyes were upon her suddenly recollected that she had gone quite as far as decorum allowed and made as masterly a retreat as the circumstances permitted
Well I have always thought a penny for your thoughts the boldest offer in the world and now it is proved
This scene made Mrs Edmonstone doubly annoyed the next morning at waking with a disabling headache which made it quite impossible for her to attempt going to Mary Rosss fete With great sincerity Amy entreated to be allowed to remain at home but she thought it would only be making the change more remarkable she did not wish Mary to be disappointed among so many ladies Amy could easily avoid getting into difficulties while Laura would she trusted be able to keep Eveleen in order
The day was sunny and all went off to admiration The gentlemen presided over the cricket and the ladies over blind mans buff and thread my needle but perhaps Mary was a little disappointed that though she had Sir Guys bodily presence the peculiar blitheness and animation which he usually shed around him were missing He sung at church he filled tiny cups from huge pitchers of tea he picked up and pacified a screaming child that had tumbled off a gate—he was as goodnatured and useful as possible but he was not his joyous and brilliant self
Amy devoted herself to the smallest fry played assiduously for three quarters of an hour with a fat grave boy of three who stood about a yardandahalf from her solemnly throwing a ball into her lap and never catching it again took charge of many caps and bonnets and walked about with Louisa Harper a companion whom no one envied her
In conclusion the sky clouded over it became chilly and a shower began to fall Laura pursued Eveleen and Amy hunted up Charlotte from the utmost parts of the field where she was the very centre of winding up the clock and sorely against her will dragged her off the wet grass About sixty yards from the house Guy met them with an umbrella which without speaking he gave to Charlotte Amy said Thank you and again came that look Charlotte rattled on and hung back to talk to Guy so that Amy could not hasten on without leaving her shelterless It may be believed that she had the conversation to herself At the door they met Mary and her father going to dismiss their flock who had taken refuge in a cartshed at the other end of the field Guy asked if he could be of any use Mr Ross said no and Mary begged Amy and Charlotte to go up to her room and change their wet shoes
There Amy would fain have stayed flushed and agitated as those looks made her but Charlotte was in wild spirits delighted at having been caught in the rain and obliged to wear shoes a mile too large and eager to go and share the fun in the drawingroom There in the twilight they found a mass of young ladies herded together making a confused sound of laughter and giggling while at the other end of the room Amy could just see Guy sitting alone in a dark corner
Charlottes tongue was soon the loudest in the medley to which Amy did not at first attend till she heard Charlotte saying—
Ah you should hear Guy sing that
What she whispered to Eveleen
The Land of the Leal was the answer
I wish he would sing it now said Ellen Harper
This darkness would be just the time for music said Eveleen it is quite a witching time
Why dont you ask him said Ellen Come Charlotte theres a good girl go and ask him
Shall I said Charlotte whispering and giggling with an affectation of shyness
No no Charlotte said Laura
No why not said Eveleen Dont be afraid Charlotte
He is so grave said Charlotte
Eveleen had been growing wilder and less guarded all day and now partly liking to tease and surprise the others and partly emboldened by the darkness she answered—
It will do him all manner of good Here Charlotte Ill tell you how to make him Tell him Amy wants him to do it
Ay tell him so cried Ellen and they laughed in a manner that overpowered Amy with horror and shyness She sprung to seize Charlotte and stop her she could not speak but Louisa Harper caught her arm and Lauras grave orders were drowned in a universal titter and suppressed exclamation—Go Charlotte go we will never forgive you if you dont
Stop Amy struggled to cry breaking from Louisa and springing up in a sort of agony Guy who had such a horror of singing anything deep in pathos or religious feeling to mixed or unfit auditors asked to do so in her name Stop oh Charlotte It was too late Charlotte thoughtless with merriment amused at vexing Laura set up with applause and confident in Guys good nature had come to him and was saying—Oh Guy Amy wants you to come and sing us the Land of the Leal
Amy saw him start up What did he think of her Oh what He stepped towards them The silly girls cowered as if they had roused a lion His voice was not loud—it was almost as gentle as usual but it quivered as if it was hard to keep it so and as well as she could see his face was rigid and stern as iron Did you wish it he said addressing himself to her as if she was the only person present
Her breath was almost gone Oh I beg your pardon she faltered She could not exculpate herself she saw it looked like an idle almost like an indecorous trick unkind everything abhorrent to her and to him especially in the present state of things His eyes were on her his head bent towards her he waited for an answer I beg your pardon was all she could say
There was—yes there was—one of those fearful flashes of his kindling eye She felt as if she was shrinking to nothing she heard him say in a low hoarse tone I am afraid I cannot then Mr Ross Mary lights came in there was a bustle and confusion and when next she was clearly conscious Laura was ordering the carriage
When it came there was an inquiry for Sir Guy
He is gone home said Mr Ross I met him in the passage and wished him good night
Mr Ross did not add what he afterwards told his daughter that Guy seemed not to know whether it was raining or not that he had put an umbrella into his hand and seen him march off at full speed through the pouring rain with it under his arm
The ladies entered the carriage Amy leant back in her corner Laura forbore to scold either Eveleen or Charlotte till she could have them separately Eveleen was silent because she was dismayed at the effect she had produced and Charlotte because she knew there was a scolding impending over her
They found no one in the drawingroom but Mr Edmonstone and Charles who said they had heard the door open and Guy run upstairs but they supposed he was wet through as he had not made his appearance It was very inhospitable in the girls not to have made room for him in the carriage
Amy went to see how her mother was longing to tell her whole trouble but found her asleep and was obliged to leave it till the morrow Poor child she slept very little but she would not go to her mother before breakfast lest she should provoke the headache into staying another day Guy was going by the train at twelve oclock and she was resolved that something should be done so as soon as her father had wished Guy goodbye and ridden off to his justice meeting she entreated her mother to come into the dressingroom and hear what she had to say
Oh mamma the most dreadful thing has happened and hiding her face she told her story ending with a burst of weeping as she said how Guy was displeased And well he might be That after all that has vexed him this week I should tease him with such a trick Oh mamma what must he think
My dear there was a good deal of silliness but you need not treat it as if it was so very shocking
Oh but it hurt him He was angry and now I know how it is he is angry with himself for being angry Oh how foolish I have been What shall I do
Perhaps we can let him know it was not your fault said Mrs Edmonstone thinking it might be very salutary for Charlotte to send her to confess
Do you think so cried Amy eagerly Oh that would make it all comfortable Only it was partly mine for not keeping Charlotte in better order and we must not throw it all on her and Eveleen You think we may tell him
I think he ought not to be allowed to fancy you let your name be so used
A message came for Mrs Edmonstone and while she was attending to it Amy hastened away fully believing that her mother had authorized her to go and explain it to Guy and ask his pardon It was what she thought the natural thing to do and she was soon by his side as she saw him pacing with folded arms under the wall
Much had lately been passing in Guys mind He had gone on floating on the sunny stream of life at Hollywell too happy to observe its especial charm till the change in Amys manner cast a sudden gloom over all Not till then did he understand his own feelings and recognize in her the being he had dreamt of Amy was what made Hollywell precious to him Sternly as he was wont to treat his impulses he did not look on his affection as an earthborn fancy liable to draw him from higher things and therefore to be combated he deemed her rather a guide and guard whose love might arm him soothe him and encourage him Yet he had little hope for he did not do justice to his powers of inspiring affection no one could distrust his temper and his character as much as he did himself and with his ancestry and the doom he believed attached to his race with his own youth and untried principles with his undesirable connections and the reserve he was obliged to exercise regarding them he considered himself as objectionable a person as could well be found as yet untouched by any positive crime and he respected the Edmonstones too much to suppose that these disadvantages could be counterbalanced for a moment by his position indeed he interpreted Amys coolness by supposing that there was a desire to discourage his attentions No poor tutor or penniless cousin ever felt he was doing a more desperate thing in confessing an attachment than did Sir Guy Morville when he determined that all should be told at the risk of losing her for ever and closing against himself the doors of his happy home It was not right and fair by her parents he thought so to regard their daughter and live in the same house with his sentiments unavowed and as to Amy herself if his feelings had reached such a pitch of sensitiveness that he must needs behave like an angry lion because her name had been dragged into an idle joke it was high time it should be explained unpropitious as the moment might be for declaring his attachment when he had manifested such a temper as any woman might dread Thus he made up his mind that come of it what might he would not leave Hollywell that day till the truth was told Just as he was turning to find Mrs Edmonstone and put his fate to the touch a little figure stood beside him and Amys own sweet low tones were saying imploringly—
Guy I wanted to tell you how sorry I am you were so teased last night
Dont think of it said he taken extremely by surprise
It was our fault I could not stop it I should have kept Charlotte in better order but they would not let her hear me I knew it was what you dislike particularly and I was very sorry
You—I was—I was But no matter now Amy he added earnestly may I ask you to walk on with me a little way I must say something to you
Was this what mamma objected to Oh no Amy felt she must stay now and in truth she was glad it was right though her heart beat fast fast faster as Guy pulling down a long trailing branch of Noisette rose and twisting it in his hand paused for a few moments then spoke collectedly and without hesitation though with the tremulousness of subdued agitation looking the while not at her but straight before him
You ought to be told why your words and looks have such effect on me as to make me behave as I did last night Shame on me for such conduct I know its evil and how preposterous it must make what I have to tell you I dont know now long it has been but almost ever since I came here a feeling has been growing up in me towards you such as I can never have for any one else
The flame rushed into Amys cheeks and no one could have told what she felt as he paused again and then went on speaking more quickly as if his emotion was less under control
If ever there is to be happiness for me on earth it must be through you as you for the last three years have been all my brightness here What I feel for you is beyond all power of telling you Amy But I know full well all there is against me—I know I am untried and how can I dare to ask one born to brightness and happiness to share the doom of my family
Amys impulse was that anything shared with him would be welcome but the strength of the feeling stifled the power of expression and she could not utter a word
It seems selfish even to dream of it he proceeded yet I must—I cannot help it To feel that I had your love to keep me safe to know that you watched for me prayed for me were my own my Verena—oh Amy it would be more joy than I have ever dared to hope for But mind he added after another brief pause I would not even ask you to answer me now far less to bind yourself even if—if it were possible I know my trial is not come and were I to render myself by positive act unworthy even to think of you it would be too dreadful to have entangled you and made you unhappy No I speak now because I ought not to remain here with such feelings unknown to your father and mother
At that moment close on the other side of the boxtree clump were heard the wheels of Charless gardenchair and Charlottes voice talking to him as he made his morning tour round the garden Amy flew off like a little bird to its nest and never stopped till breathless and crimson she darted into the dressing room threw herself on her knees and with her face hidden in her mothers lap exclaimed in panting halfsmothered whispers which needed all Mrs Edmonstones intuition to make them intelligible—
O mamma mamma he says—he says he loves me
Perhaps Mrs Edmonstone was not so very much surprised but she had no time to do more than raise and kiss the burning face and see at a moments glance how bright was the gleam of frightened joy in the downcast eye and troubled smile when two knocks given rapidly were heard and almost at the same moment the door opened and Guy stood before her his face no less glowing than that which Amy buried again on her mothers knee
Come in Guy said Mrs Edmonstone as he stood doubtful for a moment at the door and there was a sweet smile of proud joyful affection on her face conveying even more encouragement than her tone Amy raised her head and moved as if to leave the room
Dont go he said earnestly unless you wish it
Amy did not wish it especially now that she had her mother to save her confusion and she sat on a footstool holding her mothers hand looking up to Guy whenever she felt bold enough and hanging down her head when he said what showed how much more highly he prized her than silly little Amy could deserve
You know what I am come to say he began standing by the mantelshelf as was his wont in his conferences with Mrs Edmonstone and he repeated the same in substance as he had said to Amy in the garden though with less calmness and coherence and far more warmth of expression as if now that she was protected by her mothers presence he exercised less force in selfrestraint
Never was anyone happier than was Mrs Edmonstone loving Guy so heartily seeing the beauty of his character in each word rejoicing that such affection should be bestowed on her little Amy exulting in her having won such a heart and touched and gratified by the free confidence with which both had at once hastened to pour out all to her not merely as a duty but in the full ebullition of their warm young love The only difficulty was to bring herself to speak with prudence becoming her position whilst she was sympathizing with them as ardently as if she was not older than both of them put together When Guy spoke of himself as unproved and undeserving of trust it was all she could do to keep from declaring there was no one whom she thought so safe
While you go on as you have begun Guy
If you tell me to hope Oh Mrs Edmonstone is it wrong that an earthly incentive to persevere should have power which sometimes seems greater than the true one
There is the best and strongest ground of all for trusting you said she If you spoke keeping right only for Amys sake then I might fear but when she is second there is confidence indeed
If speaking were all said Guy
There is one thing I ought to say she proceeded you know you are very young and though—though I dont know that I can say so in my own person a prudent woman would say that you have seen so little of the world that you may easily meet a person you would like better than such a quiet little dull thing as your guardians daughter
The look that he cast on Amy was worth seeing and then with a smile he answered—
I am glad you dont say it in your own person
It is very bold and presumptuous in me to say anything at all in papas absence said Mrs Edmonstone smiling but I am sure he will think in the same way that things ought to remain as they are and that it is our duty not to allow you to be or to feel otherwise than entirely at liberty
I dare say it may be right in you said Guy grudgingly However I must not complain It is too much that you should not reject me altogether
To all three that space was as bright a gleam of sunshine as ever embellished life so short as to be free from a single care a perfectly serenely happy present the more joyous from having been preceded by vexations each of the two young things learning that there was love where it was most precious Guy especially isolated and lonely as he stood in life with his fear and mistrust of himself was now not only allowed to love and assured beyond his hopes that Amy returned his affection but found himself thus welcomed by the mother and gathered into the family where his warm feelings had taken up their abode while he believed himself regarded only as a guest and a stranger
They talked on with happy silences between Guy standing all the time with his branch of roses in his hand and Amy looking up to him and trying to realize it and to understand why she was so very very happy
No one thought of time till Charlotte rushed in like a whirlwind crying—
Oh here you are We could not think what had become of you There has Deloraine been at the door these ten minutes and Charlie sent me to find you for he says if you are too late for Mrs Henleys dinner she will write such an account of you to Philip as you will never get over
Very little of this was heard there was only the instinctive consternation of being too late They started up Guy threw down his roses caught Amys hand and pressed it while she bent down her head hiding the renewed blush he dashed out of the room and up to his own while Mrs Edmonstone and Charlotte hurried down In another second he was back again and once more Amy felt the pressure of his hand on hers—
Goodbye he said and she whispered another Goodbye the only words she had spoken
One moment more he lingered—
My Verena said he but the hurrying sounds in the hall warned him—he sprang down to the drawingroom Even Charles was on the alert standing leaning against the table and looking eager but Guy had not time to let him speak he only shook hands and wished goodbye with a sort of vehement agitated cordiality concealed by his haste
Wheres Amy cried Charlotte Amy Is not she coming to wish him goodbye
He said something of which upstairs was the only audible word held Mrs Edmonstones hand fast while she said in a low voice—You shall hear from papa tomorrow then sprung on his horse and looked up Amy was at the window he saw her head bending forward under its veil of curls in the midst of the roses round the lattice their eyes met once more he gave one beamy smile then rode off at full speed with Bustle racing after him while Amy threw herself on her knees by her bed and with hands clasped over her face prayed that she might be thankful enough and never be unworthy of him
Every one wanted to get rid of every one else except Mrs Edmonstone for all but Charlotte guessed at the state of the case and even she perceived that something was going on Lady Eveleen was in a state of great curiosity but she had mercy she knew that they must tell each other before it came to her turn and very goodnaturedly she invited Charlotte to come into the garden with her and kept her out of the way by a full account of her last fancy ball given with so much spirit and humour that Charlotte could not help attending
Charles and Laura gained little by this kind manoeuvre for their mother was gone up again to Amy and they could only make a few conjectures Charles nursed his right hand and asked Laura how hers felt She looked up from her work to which she had begun to apply herself diligently and gazed at him inquiringly as if to see whether he intended anything
For my part he added I certainly thought he meant to carry off the hands of some of the family
I suppose we shall soon hear it explained said Laura quietly
Soon If I had an many available legs as you would I wait for other peoples soon
I should think she had rather be left to mamma said Laura going on with her work
Then you do think there is something in it said Charles peering up in her face but he saw he was teasing her recollected that she had long seemed out of spirits and forbore to say any more He was however too impatient to remain longer quiet and presently Laura saw him adjusting his crutches
O Charlie I am sure it will only be troublesome
I am going to my own room said Charles hopping off I presume you dont wish to forbid that
His room had a door into the dressingroom so that it was an excellent place for discovering all from which they did not wish to exclude him and he did not believe he should be unwelcome for though he might pretend it was all fun and curiosity he heartily loved his little Amy
The tap of his crutches and the slow motion with which he raised himself from step to step was heard and Amy who was leaning against her mother started up exclaiming—
O mamma here comes Charlie May I tell him I am sure I cant meet him without
I suspect he has guessed it already said Mrs Edmonstone going to open the door just as he reached the head of the stairs and then leaving them
Well Amy said he looking full at her carnation cheeks are you prepared to see me turn leadcoloured and fall into convulsions like the sister with the spine complaint
O Charlie You know it But how
Amy was helping him to the sofa laid him down and sat by him on the old footstool he put his arm round her neck and she rested her head on his shoulder
Well Amy I give you joy my small woman said he talking the more nonsense because of the fullness in his throat and I hope you give me credit for amazing selfdenial in so doing
O Charlie—dear Charlie and she kissed him she could not blush more poor little thing for she had already reached her utmost capability of redness—it is no such thing
No such thing What has turned you into a turkeycock all at once or what made him nearly squeeze off my unfortunate fingers No such thing indeed
I mean—I mean it is not that We are so very young and I am so silly
Is that his reason
You must make me so much better and wiser Oh if I could but be good enough
For that matter I dont think any one else would be good enough to take care of such a silly little thing But what is the that that it is or is not
Nothing now only when we are older At least you know papa has not heard it
Provided my father gives his consent as the Irish young lady added to all her responses through the marriage service But tell me all—all you like I mean—for you will have lovers secrets now Amy
Mrs Edmonstone had meantime gone down to Laura Poor Laura as soon as her brother had left the room she allowed the fixed composure of her face to relax into a restless harassed almost miserable expression and walked up and down with agitated steps
O wealth wealth—her lips formed the words without uttering them—what cruel differences it makes All smooth here Young not to be trusted with strange reserves discreditable connections—that family—that fearful temper showing itself even to her All will be overlooked Papa will be delighted I know he will And how is it with us Proved noble superior owned as such by all as Philip is yet for that want of hateful money he would be spurned And for this—for this—the love that has grown up with our lives must be crushed down and hidden—our life is wearing out in wearying selfwatching
The lock of the door turned and Laura had resumed her ordinary expression before it opened and her mother came in but there was anything but calmness beneath for the pang of self-reproach had come—Was it thus that she prepared to hear these tidings of her sister
Well Laura began Mrs Edmonstone with the eager smile of one bringing delightful news and sure of sympathy
It is so then said Laura Dear dear little Amy I hope— and her eyes filled with tears but she had learnt to dread any outbreak of feeling conquered it in a minute and said—
What has happened How does it stand
It stands at least as far as I can say without papa as the dear Guy very rightly and wisely wished it to stand There is no positive engagement they are both too young but he thought it was not right to remain here without letting us know his sentiments towards her
A pang shot through Laura but it was but for a moment Guy might doubt where Philip need never do so Her mother went on—
Their frankness and confidence are most beautiful We know dear little Amy could not help it but there was something very sweet very noble in his way of telling all
Another pang for Laura But no it was only poverty that was to blame Philip would speak as plainly if his prospects were as fair
Oh I hope it will do well said she
It must—it will cried Mrs Edmonstone giving way to her joyful enthusiasm of affection It is nonsense to doubt knowing him as we do There is not a man in the world with whom I could be so happy to trust her
Laura could not hear Guy set above all men in the world and she remembered Philips warning to her two years ago
There is much that is very good and very delightful about him she said hesitatingly
You are thinking of the Morville temper said her mother but I am not afraid of it A naturally hot temper controlled like his by strong religious principle is far safer than a cool easy one without the principle.'
Laura thought this going too far but she felt some compensation due to Guy and acknowledged how strongly he was actuated by principle However—and it was well for her—they could not talk long for Eveleen and Charlotte were approaching and she hastily asked what was to be done about telling Eva who could not fail to guess something
We must tell her and make her promise absolute secrecy said Mrs Edmonstone I will speak to her myself but I must wait till I have seen papa There is no doubt of what he will say but we have been taking quite liberties enough in his absence
Laura did not see her sister till luncheon when Amy came down with a glow on her cheeks that made her so much prettier than usual that Charles wished Guy could have seen her She said little and ran up again as soon as she could Laura followed her and the two sisters threw their arms fondly round each other and kissed repeatedly
Mamma has told you said Amy Oh it has made me so very happy and every one is so kind
Dear dear Amy
Im only afraid—
He has begun so well—
Oh nonsense You cannot think I could be so foolish as to be afraid for him Oh no But if he should take me for more than I am worth O Laura Laura What shall I do to be as good and sensible as you I must not be silly little Amy any more
Perhaps he likes you best as you are
I dont mean cleverness I cant help that—and he knows how stupid I am—but I am afraid he thinks there is more worth in me Dont you know he has a sort of sunshine in his eyes and mind that makes all he cares about seem to him brighter and better than it really is I am afraid he is only dressing me up with that sunshine
It must be strange sunshine that you want to make you better and brighter than you are said Laura kissing her
Ill tell you what it is said Amy folding her hands and standing with her face raised it wont do now as you told me once to have no bones in my character I must learn to be steady and strong if I can for if this is to be he will depend on me I dont mean to advise him for he knows better than anybody but to be—you know what—if vexation or trouble was to come And Laura think if he was to depend on me and I was to fail Oh do help me to have firmness and selfcommand like you
It was a long time ago that we talked of your wanting bones
Yes before he came but I never forget it
Laura was obliged to go out with Eveleen All went their different ways and Amy had the garden to herself to cool her cheeks in But this was a vain operation for a fresh access of burning was brought on while Laura was helping her to dress for dinner when her fathers quick step sounded in the passage He knocked at her door and as she opened it he kissed her on each cheek and throwing his arm round her exclaimed—
Well Miss Amy you have made a fine mornings work of it A pretty thing for young ladies to be accepting offers while papa is out of the way Eh Laura
Amy knew this was a manifestation of extreme delight but it was not very pleasant to Laura
So you have made a conquest proceeded Mr Edmonstone and I heartily wish you joy of it my dear He is as amiable and goodnatured a youth as I would wish to see and I should say the same if he had not a shilling in the world
Lauras heart bounded but she knew whatever her father might fancy the reality would be very different if Guy were as poor as Philip
I shall write to him this very evening he continued and tell him if he has the bad taste to like such a silly little white thing I am not the man to stand in his way Eh Amy Shall I tell him so
Tell him what you please dear papa
Eh What I please Suppose I say we cant spare our little one and he may go about his business
Im not afraid of you papa
Come shes a good little thing—shant be teased Eh Laura what do you think of it our beauty to see your younger sister impertinent enough to set up a lover while your pink cheeks are left in the lurch
Laura not being wont to make playful repartees her silence passed unnoticed Her feelings were mixed but perhaps the predominant one was satisfaction that it was not for her pink cheeks that she was valued
It had occurred to Mrs Edmonstone that it was a curious thing after her attempt at scheming for Eveleen to have to announce to her that Guy was attached to her own daughter nay after the willingness Eveleen had manifested to be gratified with any attention Guy showed her it seemed doubtful for a moment whether the intelligence would be pleasing to her However Eveleen was just the girl to like men better than women and never to be so happy as when on the verge of flirting it would probably have been the same with any other youth that came in her way and Guy might fully be acquitted of doing more than paying her the civilities which were requisite from him to any young lady visitor He had two years ago when a mere boy idled laughed and made fun with her but his fear of trifling away his time had made him draw back before he had involved himself in what might have led to anything further and during the present visit no one could doubt that he was preoccupied with Amy At any rate it was right that Eveleen should know the truth in confidence if only to prevent her from talking of any surmises she might have
Mrs Edmonstone was set at ease in a moment Eveleen was enchanted danced round and round the room declared they would be the most charming couple in the world she had seen it all along she was so delighted they had come to an understanding at last poor things they were so miserable all last week and she must take credit to herself for having done it all Was not her aunt very much obliged to her
My dear Eva exclaimed Mrs Edmonstone into whose mind the notion never entered that any one could boast of such a proceeding as hers last night but the truth was that Eveleen feeling slightly culpable was delighted that all had turned out so well and resolved to carry it off with a high hand
To be sure Poor little Amy when she looked ready to sink into the earth she little knew her obligations to me Was not it the cleverest thing in the world It was just the touch they wanted—the very thing
My dear I am glad I know that you are sometimes given to talking nonsense said Mrs Edmonstone laughing
And you wont believe me serious You wont be grateful to me for my lucky hit said Eveleen looking comically injured Oh auntie that is very hard when I shall believe to my dying day that I did it
Why Eva if I thought it had been done by design I should find it very hard to forgive you for it at all rather hard even to accept Guy so you had better not try to disturb my belief that it was only that spirit of mischief that makes you now and then a little mad
Oh dear what a desperate scolding you must have given poor little Charlotte exclaimed Eveleen quaintly
Mrs Edmonstone could not help laughing as she confessed that she had altogether forgotten Charlotte
Then you will Youll go on forgetting her cried Eveleen She only did what she was told and did not know the malice of it There youre relenting Theres a good aunt And now if you wont be grateful as any other mamma in the world would have been and as I calculated on when I pretended to have been a prudent designing woman instead of a wild mischievous monkey at least youll forgive me enough to invite me to the wedding Oh what a beauty of a wedding it will be Id come from Kilcoran all the way on my bare knees to see it And youll let me be bridesmaid and have a ball after it
There is no saying what I may do if youll only be a good girl and hold your tongue I dont want to prevent your telling anything to your mamma of course but pray dont let it go any further Dont let Maurice hear it I have especial reasons for wishing it should not be known You know it is not even an engagement and nothing must be done which can make Guy feel in the least bound
Eveleen promised and Mrs Edmonstone knew that she had sense and proper feeling enough for her promise to deserve trust
CHAPTER 14
For falsehood now doth flow
And subject faith doth ebbe
Which would not be if reason ruled
Or wisdom weavd the webbe
The daughter of debate
That eke discord doth sowe
Shal reape no gaine where former rule
Hath taught stil peace to growe
—QUEEN ELIZABETH
ATHENAEUM TERRACE
ST MILDREDS
August 4th
MY DEAR PHILIP—Thank you for returning the books which were brought
safely by Sir Guy I am sorry you do not agree in my estimate of them I
should have thought your strong sense would have made you perceive that
reasoning upon fact and granting nothing without tangible proof were
the best remedy for a dreamy romantic tendency to the weakness and
credulity which are in the present day termed poetry and faith It is
curious to observe how these vague theories reduce themselves to the
absurd when brought into practice There are two Miss Wellwoods here
daughters of that unfortunate man who fell in a duel with old Sir Guy
Morville who seem to make it their business to become the general
subject of animadversion taking pauper children into their house where
they educate them in a way to unfit them for their station and teach
them to observe a sort of monastic rule preaching the poor people in
the hospital to death visiting the poor at all sorts of strange hours
Dr Henley actually found one of them at twelve oclock at night in a
miserable lodginghouse filled with the worst description of inmates
Quite young women too and with no mother or elder person to direct
them but it is the fashion among the attendants at the new chapel to
admire them This subject has diverted me from what I intended to say
with respect to the young baronet Your description agrees with all I
have hitherto seen though I own I expected a Redclyffe Morville to
have more of the heros de roman or rather of the grand tragic cast of
figure as if I remember right was the case with this youths
father a much finer and handsomer young man Sir Guy is certainly
gentlemanlike and has that sort of agreeability which depends on high
animal spirits I should think him clever but superficial and with his
mania for music he can hardly fail to be merely an accomplished man In
spite of all you said of the Redclyffe temper I was hardly prepared to
find it so ready to flash forth on the most inexplicable provocations
It is like walking on a volcano I have seen him two or three times draw
himself up bite his lip and answer with an effort and a sharpness that
shows how thin a crust covers the burning lava but I acknowledge that
he has been very civil and attentive and speaks most properly of what
he owes to you I only hope he will not be hurt by the possession of so
large a property so early in life and I have an idea that our good aunt
at Hollywell has done a good deal to raise his opinion of himself We
shall of course show him every civility in our power and give him the
advantage of intellectual society at our house His letters are directed
to this place as you know South Moor Farm is out of the cognizance
of the post They seem to keep up a brisk correspondence with him from
Hollywell Few guardians letters are I should guess honoured with
such deepening colour as his while reading one from my uncle He tells
me he has been calling at Stylehurst it is a pity for his sake that
Colonel Harewood is at home for the society of those sons is by no
means advisable for him I can hardly expect to offer him what is likely
to be as agreeable to him as the conversation and amusements of Edward
and Tom Harewood who are sure to be at home for the St Mildreds
races I hear Tom has been getting into fresh scrapes at Cambridge
Your affectionate sister
MARGARET HENLEY
ATHENAEUM TERRACE
ST MILDREDS
Sept 6th
MY DEAR PHILIP—No one can have a greater dislike than myself to what
is called mischiefmaking therefore I leave it entirely to you to make
what use you please of the following facts which have fallen under my
notice Sir Guy Morville has been several times at St Mildreds in
company with Tom Harewood and more than once alone with some strange
questionablelooking people and not many days ago my maid met him
coming out of a house in one of the low streets which it is hard to
assign a motive for his visiting This however might be accident and
I should never have thought of mentioning it but for a circumstance
that occurred this morning I had occasion to visit Greys Bank and
while waiting in conversation with Mr Grey a person came in whom I
knew to be a notorious gambler and offered a cheque to be changed As
it lay on the counter my eye was caught by the signature It was my
uncles I looked again and could not be mistaken It was a draft for
£30 on Drummond dated the 12th of August to Sir Guy Morville signed
C Edmonstone and endorsed in Sir Guys own writing with the name of
John White In order that I might be certain that I was doing the poor
young man no injustice I outstayed the man and asked who he was
when Mr Grey confirmed me in my belief that it was one Jack White
a jockeying sort of man who attends all the races in the country and
makes his livelihood by betting and gambling And now my dear brother
make what use of this fact you think fit though I fear there is
little hope of rescuing the poor youth from the fatal habits which are
hereditary in his family and must be strong indeed not to have been
eradicated by such careful training as you say he has received I leave
it entirely to you trusting in your excellent judgment and only hoping
you will not bring my name forward Grieving much at having to be the
first to communicate such unpleasant tidings which will occasion so
much vexation at Hollywell
Your affectionate sister
MARGARET HENLEY
Captain Morville was alone when he received the latter of these letters At first a look divided between irony and melancholy passed over his face as he read his sisters preface and her hearsay evidence but as he went farther his upper lip curled and a sudden gleam as of exultation in a verified prophecy lighted his eye shading off quickly however and giving place to an iron expression of rigidity and sternness the compressed mouth coldlyfixed eye and sedate brow composed into a grave severity that might have served for an impersonation of stern justice He looked through the letter a second time folded it up put it in his pocket and went about his usual affairs but the expression did not leave his face all day and the next morning he took a dayticket by the railway to Broadstone where as it was the day of the petty sessions he had little doubt of meeting Mr Edmonstone Accordingly he had not walked far down the High Street before he saw his uncle standing on the step of the postoffice opening a letter he had just received
Ha Philip what brings you here The very man I wanted Coming to Hollywell
No thank you I go back this evening said Philip and as he spoke he saw that the letter which Mr Edmonstone held and twisted with a hasty nervous movement was in Guys writing
Well I am glad you are here at any rate Here is the most extraordinary thing What possesses the boy I cannot guess Heres Guy writing to me for—What do you think To send him a thousand pounds
Hem said Philip in an expressive tone yet as if he was not very much amazed no explanation I suppose
No none at all Here see what he says yourself No Yes you may added Mr Edmonstone with a rapid glance at the end of the letter—a movement first to retain it and then following his first impulse with an unintelligible murmuring
Philip read—
SOUTH MOOR SEPT 7th
MY DEAR MR EDMONSTONE—You will be surprised at the request I have to make you after my resolution not to exceed my allowance However this is not for my own expenses and it will not occur again I should be much obliged to you to let me have £1OOO in what manner you please only I should be glad if it were soon I am sorry I am not at liberty to tell you what I want it for but I trust to your kindness Tell Charlie I will write to him in a day or two but between our work and walking to St Mildreds for the letters which we cannot help doing every day the time for writing is short Another month however and what a holiday it will be Tell Amy she ought to be here to see the purple of the hills in the early morning it almost makes up for having no sea The races have been making St Mildreds very gay indeed we laugh at Wellwood for having brought us here by way of a quiet place I never was in the way of so much dissipation in my life
Yours very affectionately
GUY MORVILLE
Well what do you think of it What would you do in my place—eh Philip What can he want of it eh said Mr Edmonstone tormenting his ridingwhip and looking up to study his nephews face which with stern gravity in every feature was bent over the letter as if to weigh every line Eh Philip repeated Mr Edmonstone several times without obtaining an answer
This is no place for discussion at last said Philip deliberately returning the letter Come into the readingroom We shall find no one there at this hour Here we are
Well—well—well began Mr Edmonstone fretted by his coolness to the extreme of impatience what do you think of it He cant be after any mischief tis not in the boy when—when he is all but—Pooh what am I saying Well what do you think
I am afraid it confirms but too strongly a report which I received yesterday
From your sister Does she know anything about it
Yes from my sister But I was very unwilling to mention it because she particularly requests that her name may not be used I came here to see whether you had heard of Guy lately so as to judge whether it was needful to speak of it This convinces me but I must beg in the first instance, that you will not mention her not even to my aunt
Well yes very well I promise Only let me hear
Young Harewood has I fear led him into bad company There can now be no doubt that he has been gambling
Philip was not prepared for the effect of these words His uncle started up exclaiming—Gambling Impossible Some confounded slander I dont believe one word of it I wont hear such things said of him he repeated stammering with passion and walking violently about the room This did not last long there was something in the unmoved way in which Philip waited till he had patience to listen which gradually mastered him his angry manner subsided and sitting down he continued the argument in a wouldbecomposed voice
It is utterly impossible Remember he thinks himself bound not so much as to touch a billiard cue
I could have thought it impossible but for what I have seen of the way in which promises are eluded by persons too strictly bound said Philip The moral force of principle is the only efficient pledge
Principle I should like to see who has better principles than Guy cried Mr Edmonstone You have said so yourself fifty times and your aunt has said so and Charles I could as soon suspect myself He was growing vehement but again Philips imperturbability repressed his violence and he asked Well what evidence have you Mind I am not going to believe it without the strongest I dont know that I would believe my own eyes against him
It is very sad to find such confidence misplaced said Philip Most sincerely do I wish this could be proved to be a mistake but this extraordinary request corroborates my sisters letter too fully
Let me hear said Mr Edmonstone feebly Philip produced his letter without reading the whole of it for he could not bear the appearance of gossip and prying and would not expose his sister so he pieced it out with his own words and made it sound far less discreditable to her It was quite enough for Mr Edmonstone the accuracy of the details seemed to strike him dumb and there was a long silence which he broke by saying with a deep sigh—
Who could have thought it Poor little Amy
Amy exclaimed Philip
Why ay I did not mean to have said anything of it I am sure but they did it among them said Mr Edmonstone growing ashamed under Philips eye as of a dreadful piece of imprudence I was out of the way at the time but I could not refuse my consent you know as things stood then
Do you mean to say that Amy is engaged to him
Why no—not exactly engaged only on trial you understand to see if he will be steady I was at Broadstone twas mamma settled it all Poor little thing she is very much in love with him I do believe but theres an end of everything now
It is very fortunate this has been discovered in time said Philip Instead of pitying her I should rejoice in her escape
Yes said Mr Edmonstone ruefully Who could have thought it
I am afraid the mischief is of long standing proceeded Philip resolved since he saw his uncle so grieved to press him strongly thinking that to save Amy from such a marriage was an additional motive He could hardly have arrived at losing as much as a thousand pounds all at once in this month at St Mildreds Depend upon it that painful as it may be at present there is great reason on her account to rejoice in the discovery You say he has never before applied to you for money
Not a farthing beyond his allowance except this unlucky thirty pounds for his additional expense of the tutor and the lodging
You remember however that he has always seemed short of money never appeared able to afford himself any little extra expense You have noticed it I know You remember too how unsatisfactory his reserve about his proceedings in London has been and how he has persisted in delaying there in spite of all warnings The work no doubt began there under the guidance of his uncle and now the St Mildreds races and Tom Harewood have continued it
I wish he had never set foot in the place
Nay for Amys sake the exposure is an advantage if not for his own The course must have been long since begun but he contrived to avoid what could lead to inquiry till he has at length involved himself in some desperate scrape You see he especially desires to have the money soon and he never even attempts to say you would approve of the object.
Yes he has the grace not to say that
Altogether it is worse than I could have thought possible said Philip I could have believed him unstable and thoughtless but the concealment and the attempting to gain poor Amys affections in the midst of such a course—
Ay ay cried Mr Edmonstone now fully provoked there is the monstrous part He thought I was going to give up my poor little girl to a gambler did he but he shall soon see what I think of him—riches Redclyffe title and all
I knew that would be your feeling
Feel Yes and he shall feel it too So Sir Guy you thought you had an old fool of a guardian did you whom you could blind as you pleased but you shall soon see the difference
Better begin cautiously suggested Philip Remember his unfortunate temper and write coolly
Coolly You may talk of coolness but tis enough to make ones blood boil to be served in such a way With the face to be sending her messages in the very same letter That is a pass beyond me to stand coolly to see my daughter so treated
I would only give him the opportunity of saying what he can for himself He may have some explanation
Ill admit of no explanation Passing himself off for steadiness itself daring to think of my daughter and all the time going on in this fashion I hate underhand ways Ill have no explanation He may give up all thoughts of her Ill write and tell him so before Im a day older nay before I stir from this room My little Amy indeed
Philip put no obstacles in the way of this proposal for he knew that his uncles displeasure though hot at first was apt to evaporate in exclamations and he thought it likely that his good nature his partiality for his ward his dislike to causing pain to his daughter and above all his wifes blind confidence in Guy would when once at home so overpower his present indignation as to prevent the salutary strictness which was the only hope of reclaiming Guy Beside a letter written under Philips inspection was likely to be more guarded as well as more forcible than an unassisted composition of his own as was indeed pretty well proved by the commencement of his first attempt
My dear Guy—I am more surprised than I could have expected at your application
Philip read this aloud so as to mark its absurdity and he began again
I am greatly astonished as well as concerned at your application which confirms the unpleasant reports—
Why say anything of reports said Philip Reports are nothing A man is not forced to defend himself from reports
Yes—hum—ha—the accounts I have received No You say there is not to be a word of Mrs Henley
Not a word that can lead her to be suspected
Confirms—confirms— sighed Mr Edmonstone
Dont write as if you went on hearsay evidence Speak of proofs—irrefragable proofs—and then you convict him at once without power of eluding you
So Mr Edmonstone proceeded to write that the application confirmed the irrefragable proofs then laughed at himself and helplessly begged Philip to give him a start It now stood thus—
Your letter of this morning has caused me more concern than surprise as it unhappily only adds confirmation to the intelligence already in my possession that either from want of resolution to withstand the seductions of designing persons or by the impetuosity and instability of your own character you have been led into the ruinous and degrading practice of gambling and that from hence proceed the difficulties that occasion your application to me for money I am deeply grieved at thus finding that neither the principles which have hitherto seemed to guide you nor the pledges which you used to hold sacred nor I may add the feelings you have so recently expressed towards a member of my family have been sufficient to preserve you from yielding to a temptation which could never be presented to the mind of any one whose time was properly occupied in the business of his education
Is that all I am to say about her exclaimed Mr Edmonstone after the atrocious way the fellow has treated her in
Since it is happily no engagement I cannot see how you can with propriety assume that it is one by speaking of breaking it off Besides give him no ground for complaint or he will take refuge in believing himself illused Ask him if he can disprove it and when he cannot it will be time enough to act further But wait—wait sir as the pen was moving over the paper impatient to dash forward You have not told him yet of what you accuse him
Philip meditated a few moments then produced another sentence
I have no means of judging how long you have been following this unhappy course I had rather believe it is of recent adoption but I do not know how to reconcile this idea with the magnitude of your demand unless your downward progress has been more rapid than usual in such beginnings It would I fear be quite vain for me to urge upon you all the arguments and reasons that ought to have been present to your mind and prevented you from taking the first fatal step I can only entreat you to pause and consider the ruin and degradation to which this hateful vice almost invariably conducts its victims and consistently with my duty as your guardian everything in my power shall be done to extricate you from the embarrassments in which you have involved yourself But in the first place I make it a point that you treat me with perfect confidence and make a full unequivocal statement of your proceedings above all that you explain the circumstances occasioning your request for this large sum Remember I say complete candour on your part will afford the only means of rescuing you from difficulties or of in any degree restoring you to my good opinion
So far the letter had proceeded slowly for Philip was careful and deliberate in composition and while he was weighing his words Mr Edmonstone rushed on with something unfit to stand so as to have to begin over again At last the town clock struck five Philip started declaring that if he was not at the station in five minutes he should lose the train engaged to come to Hollywell on the day an answer might be expected and hastened away satisfied by having seen two sheets nearly filled and having said there was nothing more but to sign seal and send it
Mr Edmonstone had however a page of notepaper more and it was with a sensation of relief that he wrote—
I wish from the bottom of my heart that you could clear yourself If a dozen men had sworn it till they were black in the face I would not have believed it of you that you could serve us in such a manner after the way you have been treated at home and to dare to think of my daughter with such things on your mind I could never have believed it but for the proofs Philip has brought and I am sure he is as sorry as myself Only tell the whole truth and I will do my best to get you out of the scrape Though all else must be at an end between us I am your guardian still and I will not be harsh with you
He posted his letter climbed up his tall horse and rode home rather heavyhearted but his wrath burning out as he left Broadstone behind him He saw his little Amy gay and lively and could not bear to sadden her so he persuaded himself that there was no need to mention the suspicions till he had heard what Guy had to say for himself Accordingly he told no one but his wife and she who thought Guy as unlikely to gamble as Amy herself had not the least doubt that he would be able to clear himself and agreed that it was much better to keep silence for the present
CHAPTER 15
Tis not unknown to you Antonio
How much I have disabled mine estate
By something showing a more swelling port
Than my faint means would grant continuance
—Merchant of Venice
St Mildreds was a fashionable summer resort which the virtues of a mineral spring and the reputation of Dr Henley had contributed to raise to a high degree of prosperity It stood at the foot of a magnificent range of beautifully formed hills where the crescents and villas white and smart showed their own insignificance beneath the purple peaks that rose high above them
About ten miles distant across the hills was Stylehurst the parish of the late Archdeacon Morville and the native place of Philip and his sister Margaret It was an extensive parish including a wide tract of the hilly country and in a farmhouse in the midst of the moorland midway between St Mildreds and the village of Stylehurst had Mr Wellwood fixed himself with his three pupils
Guys first visit was of course to Mrs Henley and she was on her side prepared by her brother to patronize him as Philip would have done in her place Her patronage was valuable in her own circle her connections were good the Archdeacons name was greatly respected she had a handsome and wellregulated establishment and this together with talents which having no family she had cultivated more than most women have time to do made her a person of considerable distinction at St Mildreds She was in fact the leading lady of the place—the manager of the bookclub in the chair at all the charitable committees and the principal person in society giving literary parties with a degree of exclusiveness that made admission to them a privilege
She was a very fine woman handsomer at twoandthirty than in her early bloom her height little less than that of her tall brother and her manner and air had something very distinguished The first time Guy saw her he was strongly reminded both of Philip and of Mrs Edmonstone but not pleasingly She seemed to be her aunt without the softness and motherly affection coupled with the touch of naivete that gave Mrs Edmonstone her freshness and loveableness and her likeness to her brother included that decided selfreliant air which became him well enough but which did not sit as appropriately on a woman
Guy soon discovered another resemblance—for the old unaccountable impatience of Philips conversation and relief in escaping from it haunted him before he had been a quarter of an hour in Mrs Henleys drawingroom She asked after the Hollywell party she had not seen her cousins since her marriage and happily for his feelings passed over Laura and Amy as if they were nonentities but they were all too near his heart for him to be able with patience to hear poor Charless temper regretted and still less the halfsarcastic halfcompassionate tone in which she implied that her aunt spoilt him dreadfully and showed how cheap she hold both Mr and Mrs Edmonstone
Two years ago Guy could not have kept down his irritation but now he was master of himself sufficiently to give a calm courteous reply so conveying his own respect for them that Mrs Henley was almost disconcerted
Stylehurst had great interest for Guy both for the sake of Archdeacon Morvilles kindness and as the home which Philip regarded with affection that seemed the one softening touch in his character So Guy visited the handsome church studied the graveyard and gathered the traditions of the place from the old sextons wife who rejoiced in finding an auditor for her long stories of the good Archdeacon Miss Fanny and Mr Philip She shook her head saying times were changed and Miss Morville that was never came neist the place
The squire Colonel Harewood was an old friend of his grandfathers and therefore was to be called on He had never been wise and had been dissipated chiefly from vacancy of mind he was now growing old and led a quieter life and though Guy did not find him a very entertaining companion he accepted his civilities readily for his grandfathers sake When his sons came home Guy recognized in them the description of men he was wont to shun at Oxford as much from distaste as from principle but though he did not absolutely avoid them he saw little of them being very busy and having pleasant companions in his fellow pupils It was a very merry party at South Moor and Guys high spirits made him the life of everything
The first time Mr Wellwood went to call on his cousins at St Mildreds the daughters of that officer who had fallen by the hand of old Sir Guy he began repeating for the twentieth time what an excellent fellow Morville was then said he should not have troubled them with any of his pupils but Morville would esteem their receiving him as an act of forgiveness and besides he wished them to know one whom he valued so highly Guy thus found himself admitted into an entirely new region There were two sisters together in everything Jane the younger was a kindhearted commonplace person who would never have looked beyond the ordinary range of duties and charities but Elizabeth was one of those who rise up from time to time as burning and shining lights It was not spending a quiet easy life making her charities secondary to her comforts but devoting time strength and goods not merely giving away what she could spare but actually sharing all with the poor reserving nothing for the future She not only taught the young and visited the distressed but she gathered orphans into her house and nursed the sick day and night Neither the means nor the strength of the two sisters could ever have been supposed equal to what they were known to have achieved It seemed as if the power grew with the occasion and as if they had some help which could not fail them Guy venerated them more and more and many a long letter about them was written to Mrs Edmonstone for Amy to read There is certainly a tyrannous hate in the world for unusual goodness which is a rebuke to it and there was a strong party against the sisters At the head of it was Mrs Henley who had originally been displeased at their preferring the direction of the clergyman to that of the ladies committee though the secret cause of her dislike was perhaps that Elizabeth Wellwood was just what Margaret Morville might have been So she blamed them not indeed for their charity but for slight peculiarities which might well have been lost in the brightness of the works of mercy She spoke as with her fathers authority though if she had been differently disposed she might have remembered that his system and principles were the same as theirs and that had he been alive he would probably have fully approved of their proceedings Archdeacon Morvilles name was of great weight and justified many persons in their own opinion in the opposition made to Miss Wellwood impeding her usefulness and subjecting her to endless petty calumnies
These made Guy very angry He knew enough of the Archdeacon through Mrs Edmonstone and the opinions held by Philip to think his daughter was ascribing to him what he had never held but be that as it might Guy could not bear to hear good evil spoken of and his indignation was stirred as he heard these spiteful reports uttered by people who sat at home at ease against one whose daily life was only too exalted for their imitation His brow contracted his eye kindled his lip was bitten and now and then when he trusted himself to reply it was with a keen sharp power of rebuke that made people look round astonished to hear such forcible words from one so young Mrs Henley was afraid of him without knowing it she thought she was sparing the Morville temper when she avoided the subject but as she stood in awe of no one else except her brother she disliked him accordingly
One evening Guy had been dining at Dr Henleys and was setting out enjoying his escape from Mrs Henley and her friends and rejoicing in the prospect of a five miles walk over the hills by moonlight He had only gone the length of two streets when he saw a dark figure at a little distance from him and a voice which he had little expected to hear called out—
Sir Guy himself No one else could whistle that Swedish air so correctly
My uncle exclaimed Guy I did not know that you were here
Mr Dixon laughed said something about a fortunate rencontre and began an account about a concert somewhere or other mixed up with something about his wife and child all so rambling and confused that Guy beginning to suspect he had been drinking was only anxious to get rid of him asked where he lodged and talked of coming to see him in the morning He soon found however that this had not been the case at least not to any great extent Dixon was only nervous and excited either about something he had done or some request he had to make and he went on walking by his nephews side talking in a strange desultory way of open generoushearted fellows overlooking a little indiscretion and of Guys riches which he seemed to think inexhaustible
If there is anything that you want me to do for you tell me plainly what it is said Guy at last
Mr Dixon began to overwhelm him with thanks but he cut them short I promise nothing Let me hear what you want and I can judge whether I can do it
Sebastian broke out into exclamations at the words if I can as if he thought everything in the power of the heir of Redclyffe
Have I not told you said Guy that for the present I have very little command of money Hush no more of that he added sternly cutting off an imprecation which his uncle was commencing on those who kept him so short
And you are content to bear it Did you never hear of ways and means If you were to say but one word of borrowing they would go down on their knees to you and offer you every farthing you have to keep you in their own hands
I am quite satisfied said Guy coldly
The greater fool are you was on Dixons lips but he did not utter it because he wanted to propitiate him and after some more circumlocution Guy succeeded in discovering that he had been gambling and had lost an amount which unless he could obtain immediate assistance would become known and lead to the loss of his character and situation Guy stood and considered He had an impulse but he did not think it a safe one and resolved to give himself time
I do not say that I cannot help you he answered but I must have time to consider
Time would you see me ruined while you are considering
I suppose this must be paid immediately Where do you lodge
Mr Dixon told him the street and number
You shall hear from me tomorrow morning I cannot trust my present thoughts Good night
Mr Dixon would fain have guessed whether the present thoughts were favourable but all his hope in his extremity was in his nephew it might be fatal to push him too far and with a certain trust in his goodnature Sebastian allowed him to walk away without further remonstrance
Guy knew his own impetuous nature too well to venture to act on impulse in a doubtful case He had now first to consider what he was able to do and secondly what he would do and this was not as clear to his mind as in the earlier days of his acquaintance with his uncle
Their intercourse had never been on a comfortable footing It would perhaps have been better if Philips advice had been followed and no connection kept up Guy had once begged for some definite rule since there was always vexation when he was known to have been with his uncle and yet Mr Edmonstone would never absolutely say he ought not to see him As long as his guardian permitted it or rather winked at it Guy did not think it necessary to attend to Philips marked disapproval Part of it was well founded but part was dislike to all that might be considered as vulgar and part was absolute injustice to Sebastian Dixon there was everything that could offend in his line of argument and in the very circumstance of his interfering and Guy had a continual struggle in which he was not always successful to avoid showing the affront he had taken and to reason down his subsequent indignation The everrecurring irritation which Philips conversation was apt to cause him made him avoid it as far as he could and retreat in haste from the subjects on which they were most apt to disagree and so his manner had assumed an air of reserve and almost of distrust with his cousin that was very unlike its usual winning openness
This had been one unfortunate effect of his intercourse with his uncle and another was a certain vague dissatisfied feeling which his silence and Philips insinuations respecting the days he spent in London left on Mr Edmonstones mind and which gained strength from their recurrence The days were indeed not many it was only that in coming from and going to Oxford he slept a night at an hotel in London for his uncle never would take him to his lodgings never even would tell him where they were but always gave his address at the place of his engagement was conducted by him to some concert in the evening and had him to breakfast in the morning He could not think there was any harm in this he explained all he had done to Mr Edmonstone the first time but nothing was gained by it his visits to London continued to be treated as something to be excused or overlooked—as something not quite correct
He would almost have been ready to discontinue them but that he saw that his uncle regarded him with affection and he could not bear the thought of giving up a poor relation for the sake of the opinion of his rich friends These meetings were the one pure pleasure to which Sebastian looked recalling to him the happier days of his youth and of his friendship with Guys father and when Guy perceived how he valued them it would have seemed a piece of cruel neglect to gratify himself by giving the time to Hollywell
Early in the course of their acquaintance the importunity of a creditor revealed that in spite of his handsome salary Sebastian Dixon was often in considerable distress for money In process of time Guy discovered that at the time his uncle had been supporting his sister and her husband in all the luxury he thought befitted their rank he had contracted considerable debts and he had only been able to return to England on condition of paying so much ayear to his creditors This left him very little on which to maintain his family but still his pride made him bent on concealing his difficulties and it was not without a struggle that he would at first consent to receive assistance from his nephew
Guy resolved that these debts which he considered as in fact his fathers own should be paid as soon as he had the command of his property but in the meantime he thought himself bound to send his uncle all the help in his power and when once the effort of accepting it at all was over Dixons expectations extended far beyond his power His allowance was not large and the constant requests for a few pounds to meet some pressing occasion were more than he could well meet They kept him actually a great deal poorer than men without a tenth part of his fortune and at the end of the term he would look back with surprise at having been able to pay his way but still he contrived neither to exceed his allowance nor to get into debt This was indeed only done by a rigid selfdenial of little luxuries such as most young men look on nearly as necessaries but he had never been brought up to think selfindulgence a consequence of riches he did not care what was said of him he had no expensive tastes for he did not seek after society so that he was not illprepared for such a course and only thought of it as an assistance in abstaining from the timewasting that might have tempted him if he had had plenty of money to spend
The only thing that concerned him was a growing doubt lest he might be feeding extravagance instead of doing good and the more he disliked himself for the suspicion the more it would return There was no doubt much distress the children were sickly several of them died the doctors bills and other expenses pressed heavily and Guy blamed himself for having doubted Yet again he could not conceal from himself traces that his uncle was careless and imprudent He had once indeed in a violent fit of self-reproach confessed as much allowed that what ought to have been spent in the maintenance of his family had gone in gambling but immediately after he had been seized with a fit of terror and implored Guy to guard the secret since if once it came to the knowledge of his creditors it would be all over with him Concealment of his present difficulties was therefore no less necessary than assistance in paying the sum he owed Indeed as far as Guy was able to understand his confused statement what he wanted was at once to pay a part of his debt before he could go on to a place where he was engaged to perform and where he would earn enough to make up the rest
Guy had intended to have sent for Deloraine but had since given up the idea in order to be able to help forward some plans of Miss Wellwoods and resigning this project would enable him to place thirty pounds at his uncles disposal leaving him just enough to pay his expenses at South Moor and carry him back to Hollywell It was sorely against his inclination that instead of helping a charity his savings should go to pay gaming debts and his fivemiles walk was spent in selfdebate on the right and wrong of the matter and questions what should be done for the future—for he was beginning to awaken to the sense of his responsibility and feared lest he might be encouraging vice
Very early next morning Guy put his head into his tutors room announced that he must walk into St Mildreds on business but should be back by eleven at the latest ran downstairs called Bustle and made interest with the farmers wife for a hunch of dry bread and a cup of new milk
Then rejoicing that he had made up his mind though not lighthearted enough to whistle he walked across the moorland through the white morning mist curling on the sides of the hills in fantastic forms and now and then catching his lengthened shadow so as to make him smile by reminding him of the spectre of the Brocken
Not without difficulty he found a back street and a little shop where a slovenly maid was sweeping the steps and the shutters were not yet taken down He asked if Mr Dixon lodged there Yes the woman said staring in amazement that such a gentleman could be there at that time in the morning asking for Mr Dixon
Is he at home
Yes sir but he is not up yet He was very late last night Did you want to speak to him Ill tell Mrs Dixon
Is Mrs Dixon here Then tell her Sir Guy Morville would be glad to speak to her
The maid curtseyed hurried off and returned with a message from Mrs Dixon to desire he would walk in She conducted him through a dark passage and up a still darker stair into a dingy little parlour with a carpet of red and green stripes a horsehair sofa a grate covered with cut paper and a general perfume of brandy and cigars There were some preparations for breakfast but no one was in the room but a little girl about seven years old dressed in shabbygenteel mourning
She was pale and sicklylooking but her eyes were of a lovely deep blue with a very sweet expression and a profusion of thick flaxen curls hung round her neck and shoulders She said in a soft little shy voice—
Mamma says she will be here directly if you will excuse her a moment
Having made this formal speech the little thing was creeping off on tiptoe so as to escape before the maid shut the door but Guy held out his hand sat down so as to be on a level with her and said—
Dont go my little maid Wont you come and speak to your cousin Guy
Children never failed to be attracted whether by the winning beauty of his smile or the sweetness of the voice in which he spoke to anything small or weak and the little girl willingly came up to him and put her hand into his He stroked her thick silky curls and asked her name
Marianne she answered
It was his mothers name and this little creature had more resemblance to his tenderlycherished vision of his young mother than any description Dixon could have given He drew her closer to him took the other small cold hand and asked her how she liked St Mildreds
Oh much better than London There are flowers and she proudly exhibited a cup holding some ragged robins dead nettles and other common flowers which a country child would have held cheap He admired and gained more of her confidence so that she had begun to chatter away quite freely about the high high hills that reached up to the sky and the pretty stones till the door opened and Mrs Dixon and Bustle made their entrance
Marianne was so much afraid of the dog Guy so eager to console and her mother to scold her and protest that it should not be turned out that there was nothing but confusion until Guy had shown her that Bustle was no dangerous wild beast induced her to accept his offered paw and lay a timid finger on his smooth black head after which the transition was short to dog and child sitting lovingly together on the floor Marianne stroking his ears and admiring him with a sort of silent ecstasy
Mrs Dixon was a great coarse vulgar woman and Guy perceived why his uncle had been so averse to taking him to his home and how he must have felt the contrast between such a wife and his beautiful sister She had a sort of broad sense and absence of pretension but her manner of talking was by no means pleasant as she querulously accused her husband of being the cause of all their misfortunes not even restrained by the presence of her child from entering into a full account of his offences
Mrs Dixon said she should not say a word she should not care if it was not for the child but she could not see her wronged by her own father and not complain poor little dear she was the last and she supposed she should not keep her long
It then appeared that on her husbands obtaining an engagement for a series of concerts at the chief county town Mrs Dixon had insisted on coming with him to St Mildreds in the hope that country air might benefit Marianne who in a confined lodging in London was pining and dwindling as her brothers and sisters had done before her Sebastian who liked to escape from his wifes grumbling and rigid supervision and looked forward to amusement in his own way at the races had grudgingly allowed her to come and as she described it had been reluctant to go to even so slight an expense in the hope of saving his childs life She had watched him as closely as she could but he had made his escape and the consequences Guy already knew
If anything could have made it worse it was finding that after parting last night he had returned tried to retrieve his luck had involved himself further had been drinking more and at the very hour when his nephew was getting up to see what could be done for him had come home in a state which made it by no means likely that he would be presentable if his wife called him as she offered to do
Guy much preferred arranging with her what was to be done on the present emergency She was disappointed at finding thirty pounds was all the help he could give but she was an energetic woman full of resources and saw her way with this assistance through the present difficulty The great point was to keep the gambling propensities out of sight of the creditors and as long as this was done she had hope Dixon would go the next morning to the town where the musical meeting was to be held and there he would be with his employers where he had a character to preserve so that she was in no fear of another outbreak
It ended therefore in his leaving with her Mr Edmonstones draft securing its destination by endorsing it to the person who was to receive it and wishing her good morning after a few more kind words to little Marianne who had sat playing with Bustle all the time sidling continually nearer and nearer to her new cousin her eyes bent down and no expression on her face which could enable him to guess how far she listened to or comprehended the conversation so unfit for her ear When he rose to go and stooped to kiss her she looked wistfully in his face and held up a small sparkling bit of spar the most precious of all her hoards gleaned from the roadsides of St Mildreds
What child do you want to give it to Sir Guy said her mother He does not want such trumpery my dear though you make such a work with it
Did you mean to give it to me my dear said Guy as the child hung her head and crimsoned with blushes could scarcely whisper her timid Yes
He praised it and let her put it in his waistcoat pocket and promised he would always keep it and kissed her again and left her a happy child confident in his promise of always keeping it though her mother augured that he would throw it over the next hedge
He was at South Moor by eleven oclock in time for his mornings business and made up for the troubles of the last few hours by a long talk with Mr Wellwood in the afternoon while the other two pupils were gone to the races for which he was not inclined after his two tenmile walks
The conversation was chiefly on Church prospects in general and in particular on Miss Wellwood and her plans how they had by degrees enlarged and developed as the sin and misery and ignorance around had forced themselves more plainly on her notice and her means had increased and grown under her hand in the very distribution Other schemes were dawning on her mind of which the foremost was the foundation of a sort of school and hospital united under the charge of herself her sister and several other ladies who were desirous of joining her as a sisterhood But at present it was hoping against hope for there were no funds with which to make a commencement All this was told at unawares drawn forth by different questions and remarks till Guy inquired how much it would take to give them a start
It is impossible to say Anything I suppose between one thousand and twenty But by the bye this design of Elizabeths is an absolute secret If you had not almost guessed it I should never have said one word to you about it You are a particularly dangerous man with your connection with Mrs Henley You must take special good care nothing of it reaches her
Guys first impression was that he was the last person to mention it to Mrs Henley but when he remembered how often her brother was at Hollywell he perceived that there might be a train for carrying the report back again to her and recognized the absolute necessity of silence
He said nothing at the time but a bright scheme came into his head resulting in the request for a thousand pounds which caused so much astonishment He thought himself rather shabby to have named no more and was afraid it was an offering that cost him nothing but he much enjoyed devising beforehand the letter with which he would place the money at the disposal of Miss Wellwoods hospital
CHAPTER 16
Yet burns the sun on high beyond the cloud
Each in his southern cave
The warm winds linger but to be allowed
One breathing oer the wave
One flight across the unquiet sky
Swift as a vane may turn on high
The smile of heaven comes on
So waits the Lord behind the veil
His light on frenzied cheek or pale
To shed when the dark hour is gone
—LYRA INNOCENTIUM
On the afternoon on which Guy expected an answer from Mr Edmonstone he walked with his fellow pupil Harry Graham to see if there were any letters from him at Dr Henleys
The servant said Mrs Henley was at home and asked them to come in and take their letters These were lying on a marble table in the hall and while the man looked in the drawingroom for his mistress and sent one of the maids upstairs in quest of her Guy hastily took up one bearing his address in the wellknown hand of Mr Edmonstone
Young Graham who had taken up a newspaper was startled by Guys loud sudden exclamation—
Ha What on earth does this mean
And looking up saw his face of a burning glowing red the features almost convulsed the large veins in the forehead and temples swollen with the blood that rushed through them and if ever his eyes flashed with the dark lightning of Sir Hughs it was then
Morville Whats the matter
Intolerable—insulting Me What does he mean continued Guy his passion kindling more and more Proofs I should like to see them The man is crazy I to confess Ha as he came towards the end I see it—I see it It is Philip is it that I have to thank Meddling coxcomb Ill make him repent it added he with a grim fierceness of determination Slandering me to them And that—looking at the words with regard to Amy—that passes all He shall see what it is to insult me
What is it Your guardian out of humour asked his companion
My guardian is a mere weak fool I dont blame him—he cant help it but to see him made a tool of He twists him round his finger abuses his weakness to insult—to accuse But he shall give me an account
Guys voice had grown lower and more husky but though the sound sunk the force of passion rather increased than diminished it was like the low distant sweep of the tempest as it whirls away preparing to return with yet more tremendous might His colour too had faded to paleness but the veins were still swollen purple and throbbing and there was a stillness about him that made his wrath more than fierce intense almost appalling
Harry Graham was dumb with astonishment but while Guy spoke Mrs Henley had come down and was standing before them beginning a greeting The blood rushed back into Guys cheeks and controlling his voice with powerful effort he said—
I have had an insulting—an unpleasant letter he added catching himself up You must excuse me and he was gone
What has happened exclaimed Mrs Henley though from her brothers letter as well as from her observations during a long and purposely slow progress along a railed gallery overhanging the hall and down a winding staircase she knew pretty well the whole history of his anger
I dont know said young Graham Some absurd person interfering between him and his guardian I should be sorry to be him to fall in his way just now It must be something properly bad I never saw a man in such a rage I think I had better go after him and see what he has done with himself
You dont think said Mrs Henley detaining him that his guardian could have been finding fault with him with reason
Who Morville His guardian must have a sharp eye for picking holes if he can find any in Morville Not a steadier fellow going—only too much so
Ah thought Mrs Henley these young men always hang together and she let him escape without further question But when he emerged from the house Guy was already out of sight and he could not succeed in finding him
Guy had burst out of the house feeling as if nothing could relieve him but free air and rapid motion and on he hurried fast faster conscious alone of the wild furious tumult of rage and indignation against the maligner of his innocence who was knowingly ruining him with all that was dearest to him insulting him by reproaches on his breaking a most sacred unblemished word and what Guy felt scarcely less keenly forcing kindhearted Mr Edmonstone into a persecution so foreign to his nature The agony of suffering such an accusation and from such a quarter—the violent storm of indignation and pride—wild undefined ideas of a heavy reckoning—above all the dreary thought of Amy denied to him for ever—all these swept over him and swayed him by turns with the dreadful intensity belonging to a nature formed for violent passions which had broken down in the sudden shock all the barriers imposed on them by a long course of self-restraint
On he rushed reckless whither he went or what he did driven forward by the wild impulse of passion far over moor and hill up and down till at last exhausted at once by the tumult within and by the violent bodily exertion a stillness—a suspension of thought and sensation—ensued and when this passed he found himself seated on a rock which crowned the summit of one of the hills his handkerchief loosened his waistcoat open his hat thrown off his temples burning and throbbing with a feeling of distraction and the agitated beatings of his heart almost stifling his panting breath
Yes he muttered to himself a heavy account shall he pay me for this crowning stroke of a long course of slander and illwill Have I not seen it Has not he hated me from the first misconstrued every word and deed though I have tried striven earnestly to be his friend—borne as not another soul would have done with his impertinent interference and intolerable patronizing airs But he has seen the last of it anything but this might be forgiven but sowing dissension between me and the Edmonstones—maligning me there Never Knowing too as he seems to do how I stand it is the very ecstasy of malice Ay this very night it shall be exposed and he shall be taught to beware—made to know with whom he has to deal
Guy uttered this last with teeth clenched in an excess of deep vengeful ire Never had Morville of the whole line felt more deadly fierceness than held sway over him as he contemplated his revenge looked forward with a dire complacency to the punishment he would wreak not for this offence alone but for a long course of enmity He sat absorbed in the plan of vengeance perfectly still for his physical exhaustion was complete but as the pulsations of his heart grew less wild his purpose became sterner and more fixed He devised its execution planned his sudden journey saw himself bursting on Philip early next morning summoning him to answer for his falsehoods The impulse to action seemed to restore his power over his senses He looked round to see where he was raising his head from his hands
The sun was setting opposite to him in a flood of gold—a ruddy ball surrounded with its pomp of clouds on the dazzling sweep of horizon That sight recalled him not only to himself but to his true and better self the good angel so close to him for the twenty years of his life had been driven aloof but for a moment and now either that or a still higher and holier power made the setting sun bring to his mind almost to his ear the words—
Let not the sun go down upon your wrath
Neither give place to the devil
Guy had what some would call a vivid imagination others a lively faith He shuddered then his elbows on his knees and his hands clasped over his brow he sat bending forward with his eyes closed wrought up in a fearful struggle while it was to him as if he saw the hereditary demon of the Morvilles watching by his side to take full possession of him as a rightful prey unless the battle was fought and won before that red orb had passed out of sight Yes the besetting fiend of his family—the spirit of defiance and resentment—that was driving him even now while realizing its presence to disregard all thoughts save of the revenge for which he could barter everything—every hope once precious to him
It was horror at such wickedness that first checked him and brought him back to the combat His was not a temper that was satisfied with half measures He locked his hands more rigidly together vowing to compel himself ere he left the spot to forgive his enemy—forgive him candidly—forgive him so as never again to have to say I forgive him He did not try to think for reflection only lashed up his sense of the wrong but as if there was power in the words alone he forced his lips to repeat—
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive them that trespass against us
Coldly and hardly were they spoken at first again he pronounced them again again—each time the tone was softer each time they came more from the heart At last the remembrance of greater wrongs and worse revilings came upon him his eyes filled with tears the most subduing and healing of all thoughts—that of the great Example—became present to him the foe was driven back
Still he kept his hands over his face The tempter was not yet defeated without hope It was not enough to give up his first intention no great sacrifice as he perceived now that he had time to think how Philip would be certain to treat a challenge it was not enough to wish no ill to his cousin to intend no evil measure he must pardon from the bottom of his heart regard him candidly and not magnify his injuries
He sat long in deep thought his head bent down and his countenance stern with inward conflict It was the hardest part of the whole battle for the Morville disposition was as vindictive as passionate but at last he recovered clearness of vision His request might well appear unreasonable and possibly excite suspicion and for the rest it was doing a man of honour like Philip flagrant injustice to suspect him of originating slanders He was of course under a mistake had acted not perhaps kindly but as he thought rightly and judiciously in making his suspicions known If he had caused his uncle to write provokingly every one knew that was his way he might very properly wish under his belief to save Amabel and though the manner might have been otherwise the proceeding itself admitted complete justification Indeed when Guy recollected the frenzy of his rage and his own murderous impulse he was shocked to think that he had ever sought the love of that pure and gentle creature as if it had been a cruel and profane linking of innocence to evil He was appalled at the power of his fury he had not known he was capable of it for his boyish passion even when unrestrained had never equalled this in all the strength of early manhood
He looked up and saw that the last remnant of the suns disk was just disappearing beneath the horizon The victory was won
But Guys feeling was not the rejoicing of the conquest it was more the relief which is felt by a little child weary of its fit of naughtiness when its tearful face is raised mournful yet happy in having won true repentance and it says I am sorry now
He rose looked at his watch wondered to find it so late gazed round and considered his bearings perceiving with a sense of shame how far he had wandered then retraced his steps slowly and wearily and did not reach South Moor till long after dark
CHAPTER 17
My blood hath been too cold and temperate
Unapt to stir at these indignities
But you have found me
—KING HENRY IV
Philip according to promise appeared at Hollywell and a volume of awful justice seemed written on his brow Charles though ignorant of its cause perceived this at a glance and greeted him thus—
Enter Don Philip II the Duke of Alva alguazils corregidors and executioners
Is anything the matter Philip said Amy a question which took him by surprise as he could not believe her in ignorance He was sorry for her and answered gravely—
Nothing is amiss with me thank you Amy
She knew he meant that he would tell no more and would have thought no more about it but that she saw her mother was very uneasy
Did you ask whether there were any letters at the post said Charles Guy is using us shamefully—practising selfdenial on us I suppose Is there no letter from him
There is said Philip reluctantly
Well where is it
It is to your father
Oh said Charles with a disappointed air Are you sure Depend on it you overlooked my M He has owed me a letter this fortnight Let me see
It is for my uncle repeated Philip as if to put an end to the subject
Then he has been so stupid as to forget my second name Come give it me I shall have it sooner or later
I assure you Charles it is not for you
Would not any one suppose he had been reading it exclaimed Charles
Did you know Mary Ross was gone to stay with her brother John broke in Mrs Edmonstone in a nervous hurried manner
No is she replied Philip
Yes his wife is ill
The universal feeling was that something was amiss and mamma was in the secret Amy looked wistfully at her but Mrs Edmonstone only gazed at the window and so they continued for some minutes while an uninteresting exchange of question and answer was kept up between her and her nephew until at length the dressingbell rang and cleared the room Mrs Edmonstone lingered till her son and daughters were gone and said—
You have heard from St Mildreds
Yes said Philip as if he was as little inclined to be communicative to her as to his cousins
From Guy or from Margaret
From Margaret
But you say there is a letter from him
Yes for my uncle
Does she say nothing more satisfactory asked his aunt her anxiety tortured by his composure Has she learnt no more
Nothing more of his proceedings I see Amy knows nothing of the matter
No her papa thought there was no need to distress her till we had seen whether he could explain
Poor little thing said Philip I am very sorry for her
Mrs Edmonstone did not choose to discuss her daughters affairs with him and she turned the conversation to ask if Margaret said much of Guy
She writes to tell the spirit in which he received my uncles letter It is only the Morville temper again and of course whatever you may think of that on Amys account I should never regard it as concerns myself as other than his misfortune I hope he may be able to explain the rest
Ah there comes your uncle and Mr Edmonstone entered
How dye do Philip Brought better news eh
Here is a letter to speak for itself.'
Eh From Guy Give it me What does he say Let me see Here mamma read it your eyes are best
Mrs Edmonstone read as follows—
MY DEAR MR EDMONSTONE—Your letter surprised and grieved me very much I cannot guess what proofs Philip may think he has of what I never did and therefore I cannot refute them otherwise than by declaring that I never gamed in my life Tell me what they are and I will answer them As to a full confession I could of course tell you of much in which I have done wrongly though not in the way which he supposes On that head I have nothing to confess I am sorry I am prevented from satisfying you about the £1OOO but I am bound in honour not to mention the purpose for which I wanted it I am sure you could never believe I could have said what I did to Mrs Edmonstone if I had begun on a course which I detest from the bottom of my heart Thank you very much for the kindness of the latter part of your letter I do not know how I could have borne it if it had ended as it began I hope you will soon send me these proofs of Philips Ever your affectionate G M
Not a little surprised was Philip to find that he was known to be Guys accuser but the conclusion revealed that his style had betrayed him and that Mr Edmonstone had finished with some mention of him and he resolved that henceforth he would never leave a letter of his own dictation till he had seen it signed and sealed
Well cried Mr Edmonstone joyfully beating his own hand with his glove that is all right I knew it would be so He cant even guess what we are at I am glad we did not tease poor little Amy Eh mamma—eh Philip the last eh being uttered much more doubtfully and less triumphantly than the first
I wonder you think it right said Philip
What more would you have said Mr Edmonstone hastily
Confidence
Eh Oh ay he says he cant tell—bound in honour
It is easy to write offhand and say I cannot satisfy you I am bound in honour but that is not what most persons would think a full justification especially considering the terms on which you stand
Why yes he might have said more It would have been safe enough with me
It is his usual course of mystery reserve and defiance
The fact is said Mr Edmonstone turning away that it is a very proper letter right sense proper feeling—and if he never gamed in his life what would you have more
There are different ways of understanding such a denial as this said Philip See he says not in the way in which I suppose He held up his hand authoritatively as his aunt was about to interpose It was against gaming that his vow was made I never thought he had played but he never says he has not betted
He would never be guilty of a subterfuge exclaimed Mr Edmonstone indignantly
I should not have thought so without the evidence of the payment of the cheque my uncle had just given him to this gambling fellow said Philip yet it is only the natural consequence of the habit of eluding inquiry into his visits to London
I cant see any reason for so harsh an accusation said she
I should hardly want more reason than his own words He refuses to answer the question on which my uncles good opinion depends he owns he has been to blame and thus retracts his full denial In my opinion his letter says nothing so plainly as While I can stand fair with you I do not wish to break with you
He will not find that quite so easy cried Mr Edmonstone I am no fool to be hoodwinked especially where my little Amy is concerned Ill see all plain and straight before he says another word of her But you see what comes of their settling it while I was out of the way
Mrs Edmonstone was grieved to see him so hurt at this It could not have been helped and if all had been smooth he never would have thought of it again but it served to keep up his dignity in his own eyes and as he fancied to defend him from Philips censure and he therefore made the most of it which so pained her that she did not venture to continue her championship of Guy
Well well said Mr Edmonstone the question is what to do next—eh Philip I wish he would have spoken openly I hate mysteries Ill write and tell him this wont do he must be explicit—eh Philip
We will talk it over by and by said Philip
His aunt understood that it was to be in her absence and left the room fearing it would be impossible to prevent Amy from being distressed though she had no doubt that Guy would be able to prove his innocence of the charges She found Amy waiting for her in her room
Dont ring mamma dear Ill fasten your dress said she then pausing—Oh mamma I dont know whether I ought to ask but if you would only tell me if there is nothing gone wrong
I dont believe there is anything really wrong my dear said Mrs Edmonstone kissing her as she saw how her colour first deepened and then faded
Oh no said she
But there is some mystery about his moneymatters which has vexed your papa
And what has Philip to do with it
I cannot quite tell my dear I believe Margaret Henley has heard something but I do not know the whole
Did you see his letter mamma said Amy in a low trembling voice
Yes it is just like himself and absolutely denies the accusations
Amy did not say then they are false but she held up her head
Then papa is satisfied she said
I have no doubt all will be made clear in time said her mother but there is still something unexplained and I am afraid things may not go smoothly just now I am very sorry my little Amy that such a cloud should have come over you she added smoothing fondly the long soft hair sad at heart to see the cares and griefs of womanhood gathering over her childs bright young life
I said I must learn to bear things murmured Amy to herself Only and the tears filled her eyes and she spoke with almost childish simplicity of manner I cant bear them to vex him I wish Philip would let papa settle it alone Guy will be angry and grieved afterwards
They were interrupted by the dinnerbell but Amy ran into her own room for one moment
I said I would learn to bear said she to herself or I shall never be fit for him Yes I will even though it is the thinking he is unhappy He said I must be his Verena I know what that means I ought not to be uneasy for he will bear it beautifully and say he is glad of it afterwards And I will try not to seem cross to Philip
Mr Edmonstone was fidgety and ill at ease found fault with the dinner and was pettish with his wife Mrs Edmonstone set Philip off upon politics which lasted till the ladies could escape into the drawingroom In another minute Philip brought in Charles set him down and departed Amy who was standing by the window resting her forehead against the glass and gazing into the darkness turned round hastily and left the room but in passing her brother she put her hand into his and received a kind pressure Her mother followed her and the other three all began to wonder Charles said he had regularly been turned out of the diningroom by Philip who announced that he wanted to speak to his uncle and carried him off
They conjectured and were indignant at each others conjectures till their mother returned and gave them as much information as she could but this only made them very anxious Charles was certain that Mrs Henley had laid a cockatrice egg and Philip was hatching it and Laura could not trust herself to defend Philip lest she should do it too vehemently They could all agree in desire to know the truth in hope that Guy was not culpable and above all in feeling for Amy but by tacit consent they were silent on the three shades of opinion in their minds Laura was confident that Philip was acting for the best Mrs Edmonstone thought he might be mistaken in his premises but desirous of Guys real good and Charles though sure he would allege nothing which he did not believe to be true also thought him ready to draw the worst conclusions from small grounds and to take pleasure in driving Mr Edmonstone to the most rigorous measures
Philip meanwhile was trying to practise great moderation and forbearance not bringing forward at first what was most likely to incense Mr Edmonstone and without appearance of animosity in his cool guarded speech There was no design in this he meant only to be just yet anything less cool would have had far less effect
When he shut the diningroom door he found his uncle wavering touched by the sight of his little Amy returning to his first favourable view of Guys letter ready to overlook everything accept the justification and receive his ward on the same footing as before though he was at the same time ashamed that Philip should see him relent and desirous of keeping up his character for firmness little guessing how his nephew felt his power over him and knew that he could wield him at will
Perceiving and pitying his feebleness and sincerely believing strong measures the only rescue for Amy the only hope for Guy Philip found himself obliged to work on him by the production of another letter from his sister He would rather if possible have kept this back so much did his honourable feeling recoil from what had the air of slander and mischiefmaking but he regarded firmness on his uncles part as the only chance for Guy or for his cousin and was resolved not to let him swerve from strict justice
Mrs Henley had written immediately after Guys outburst in her house and taking it for granted that her brother would receive a challenge she wrote in the utmost alarm urging him to remember how precious he was to her and not to depart from his own principles
You would not be so mad as to fight him eh said Mr Edmonstone anxiously You know better—besides for poor Amys sake
For the sake of right replied Philip no I have reassured my sister I have told her that let the boy do what he will he shall never make me guilty of his death
You have heard from him then
No I suppose a nights reflection convinced him that he had no rational grounds for violent proceedings and he had sense enough not to expose himself to such an answer as I should have given What caused his wrath to be directed towards me especially I cannot tell nor can my sister said Philip looking full at his uncle but I seem to have come in for a full share of it
He proceeded to read the description of Guys passion and the expressions he had used Violent as it had been it did not lose in Mrs Henleys colouring and what made the effect worse was that she had omitted to say she had overheard his language so that it appeared as if he had been unrestrained even by gentlemanly feeling and had thus spoken of her brother and uncle in her presence
Mr Edmonstone was resentful now really displeased and wounded to the quick The point on which he was especially sensitive was his reputation for sense and judgment and that Guy who had shown him so much respect and affection whom he had treated with invariable kindness and received into his family like a son that he should thus speak of him shocked him extremely He was too much overcome even to break out into exclamations at first he only drank off his glass of wine hastily and said I would never have thought it
With these words all desire for forbearance and toleration departed If Guy could speak thus of him he was ready to believe any accusation to think him deceitful from the first to say he had been trifling with Amy to imagine him a confirmed reprobate and cast him off entirely Philip had some difficulty to restrain him from being too violent and to keep him to the matter in hand he defended Guy from the exaggerations of his imagination in a manner which appeared highly noble considering how Guy had spoken of him Before they parted that night another letter had been written which stood thus—
DEAR SIR GUY—Since you refuse the confidence which I have a right to demand since you elude the explanation I asked and indulge yourself in speaking in disrespectful terms of me and my family I have every reason to suppose that you have no desire to continue on the same footing as heretofore at Hollywell As your guardian I repeat that I consider myself bound to keep a vigilant watch over your conduct and if possible to recover you from the unhappy course in which you have involved yourself but all other intercourse between you and this family must cease Your horse shall be sent to Redclyffe tomorrow
Yours faithfully
C EDMONSTONE
This letter was more harsh than Philip wished but Mr Edmonstone would hardly be prevailed on to consent to enter on no further reproaches He insisted on banishing Deloraine as well as on the mention of Guys disrespect both against his nephews opinion but it was necessary to let him have his own way on these points and Philip thought himself fortunate in getting a letter written which was in any degree rational and moderate
They had been so busy and Mr Edmonstone so excited that Philip thought it best to accept the offer of tea being sent them in the diningroom and it was not till nearly midnight that their conference broke up when Mr Edmonstone found his wife sitting up by the dressingroom fire having shut Charless door sorely against his will
There began Mr Edmonstone you may tell Amy she may give him up and a lucky escape she has had But this is what comes of settling matters in my absence So he proceeded with the narration mixing the facts undistinguishably with his own surmises and overwhelming his wife with dismay If a quarter of this was true defence of Guy was out of the question and it was still more impossible to wish Amys attachment to him to continue and though much was incredible it was no time to say so She could only hope morning would soften her husbands anger and make matters explicable
Morning failed to bring her comfort Mr Edmonstone repeated that Amy must be ordered to give up all thoughts of Guy and she perceived that the words ascribed to him stood on evidence which could not be doubted She could believe he might have spoken them in the first shock of an unjust imputation and she thought he might have been drawn into some scrape to serve a friend but she could never suppose him capable of all Mr Edmonstone imagined
The first attempt to plead his cause however brought on her an angry reply for Philip by a hint that she never saw a fault in Guy had put it into his uncles head that she would try to lead him and made him particularly inaccessible to her influence
There was no help for it then poor little Amy must hear the worst and it was not long before Mrs Edmonstone found her waiting in the dressingroom Between obedience to her husband her conviction of Guys innocence and her tenderness to her daughter Mrs Edmonstone had a hard task and she could scarcely check her tears as Amy nestled up for her morning kiss
O mamma what is it
Dearest I told you a cloud was coming Try to bear it Your papa is not satisfied with Guys answer and it seems he spoke some hasty words of papa and Philip they have displeased papa very much and my dear child you must try to bear it he has written to tell Guy he must not think any more of you
He has spoken hasty words of papa repeated Amy as if she had not heard the rest How sorry he must be
As she spoke Charless door was pushed open and in he came half dressed scrambling on with but one crutch to the chair near which she stood with drooping head and clasped hands
Never mind little Amy he said Ill lay my life tis only some monstrous figment of Mrs Henleys Trust my word it will right itself; it is only a rock to keep true love from running too smooth Come dont cry as her tears began to flow fast I only meant to cheer you up
I am afraid Charlie said his mother putting a force on her own feeling it is not the best or kindest way to do her good by telling her to dwell on hopes of him
Mamma one of Philips faction exclaimed Charles
Of no faction at all Charles but I am afraid it is a bad case and Mrs Edmonstone related what she knew glad to address herself to any one but Amy who stood still meanwhile her hands folded on the back of her brothers chair
Charles loudly protested that the charges were absurd and preposterous and would be proved so in no time He would finish dressing instantly go to speak to his father and show him the sense of the thing Amy heard and hoped and his mother who had great confidence in his clear sight was so cheered as almost to expect that todays post might carry a conciliatory letter
Meantime Laura and Philip met in the breakfastroom and in answer to her anxious inquiry he had given her an account of Guy which though harsh enough was far more comprehensible than what the rest had been able to gather
She was inexpressibly shocked My poor dear little Amy she exclaimed O Philip now I see all you thought to save me from
It is an unhappy business that it ever was permitted
Poor little dear She was so happy so very happy and sweet in her humility and her love Do you know Philip I was almost jealous for a moment that all should be so easy for them and I blamed poverty but oh there are worse things than poverty
He did not speak but his dark blue eye softened with the tender look known only to her and it was one of the precious moments for which she lived She was happy till the rest came down and then a heavy cloud seemed to hang on them at breakfast time
Charles who found anxiety on Guys account more exciting though considerably less agreeable than he had once expected would not go away with the womankind but as soon as the door was shut exclaimed
Now then Philip let me know the true grounds of your persecution
It was not a conciliating commencement His father was offended and poured out a confused torrent of Guys imagined misdeeds while Philip explained and modified his exaggerations
So the fact is said Charles at length that Guy has asked for his own money and when in lieu of it he received a letter full of unjust charges he declared Philip was a meddling coxcomb I advise you not to justify his opinion
Philip disdained to reply and after a few more of Mr Edmonstones exclamations Charles proceeded
This is the great sum total
No said Philip I have proof of his gambling
What is it
I have shown it to your father and he is satisfied
Is it not proof enough that he is lost to all sense of propriety that he should go and speak in that fashion of us and to Philips own sister cried Mr Edmonstone What would you have more
That little epithet applied to Captain Morville is hardly to my mind proof sufficient that a man is capable of every vice said Charles who in the pleasure of galling his cousin did not perceive the harm he did his friends cause by recalling the affront which his father at least felt most deeply Mr Edmonstone grew angry with him for disregarding the insulting term applied to himself and Charles who though improved in many points still sometimes showed the effects of early habits of disrespect to his father answered hastily that no one could wonder at Guys resenting such suspicions he deserved no blame at all and would have been a blockhead to bear it tamely
This was more than Charles meant but his temper was fairly roused and he said much more than was right or judicious so that his advocacy only injured the cause He had many representations to make on the injustice of condemning Guy unheard of not even laying before him the proofs on which the charges were founded and on the danger of actually driving him into mischief by shutting the doors of Hollywell against him If you wanted to make him all you say he is you are taking the very best means
Quite true but Charles had made his father too angry to pay attention This stormy discussion continued for nearly two hours with no effect save inflaming the minds of all parties At last Mr Edmonstone was called away and Charles rising declared he should go at that moment and write to tell Guy that there was one person at least still in his senses
You will do as you please said Philip
Thank you for the permission said Charles proudly
It is not to me that your submission is due said Philip
Ill tell you what Philip I submit to my own father readily but I do not submit to Captain Morvilles instrument
We have had enough of unbecoming retorts for one day said Philip quietly and offering his arm
Much as Charles disliked it he was in too great haste not to accept it and perceiving that there were visitors in the drawingroom he desired to go upstairs
People who always come when they are not wanted he muttered as he went up pettish with them as with everything else
I do not think you in a fit mood to be advised Charles said Philip but to free my own conscience let me say this Take care how you promote this unfortunate attachment
Take care what you say exclaimed Charles flushing with anger as he threw himself forward with an impatient movement trusting to his crutch rather than retain his cousins arm but the crutch slipped he missed his grasp at the balusters and would have fallen to the bottom of the flight if Philip had not been close behind Stretching out his foot he made a barrier receiving Charless weight against his breast and then taking him in his arms carried him up the rest of the way as easily as if he had been a child The noise brought Amy out of the dressingroom much frightened though she did not speak till Charles was deposited on the sofa and assured them he was not in the least hurt but he would hardly thank his cousin for having so dexterously saved him and Philip relieved from the fear of his being injured viewed the adventure as a mere ebullition of illtemper and went away
A fine helpless log am I exclaimed Charles as he found himself alone with Amy A pretty thing for me to talk of being of any use when I cant so much as show my anger at an impertinence about my own sister without being beholden for not breaking my neck to the very piece of presumption that uttered it
Oh dont speak so began Amy and at that moment Philip was close to them set down the crutch that had been dropped and went without speaking
I dont care who hears said Charles I say there is no greater misery in this world than to have the spirit of a man and the limbs of a cripple I know if I was good for anything things would not long be in this state I should be at St Mildreds by this time at the bottom of the whole story and Philip would be taught to eat his words in no time and make as few wry faces as suited his dignity But what is the use of talking This sofa—and he struck his fist against it—is my prison and I am a miserable cripple and it is mere madness in me to think of being attended to
O Charlie cried Amy caressingly and much distressed dont talk so Indeed I cant bear it You know it is not so
Do I Have not I been talking myself hoarse showing up their injustice saying all a man could say to bring them to reason and not an inch could I move them I do believe Philip has driven my father stark mad with these abominable stories of his sisters which I verily believe she invented herself
O no she could not Dont say so
What Are you going to believe them too
Never
It is that which drives me beyond all patience proceeded Charles to see Philip lay hold of my father and twist him about as he chooses and set every one down with his authority
Philip soon goes abroad said Amy who could not at the moment say anything more charitable
Ay there is the hope My father will return to his natural state provided they dont drive Guy in the meantime to do something desperate
No they wont whispered Amy
Well give me the blottingbook Ill write to him this moment and tell him we are not all the tools of Philips malice
Amy gave the materials to her brother and then turning away busied herself in silence as best she might in the employment her mother had recommended her of sorting some gardenseeds for the cottagers After an interval Charles said
Well Amy what shall I say to him for you
There was a little silence and presently Amy whispered I dont think I ought
What asked Charles not catching her very low tones as she sat behind him with her head bent down
I dont think it would be right she repeated more steadily
Not right for you to say you dont think him a villain
Papa said I was to have no—and there her voice was stopped with tears
This is absurd Amy said Charles when it all was approved at first and now my father is acting on a wrong impression what harm can there be in it Every one would do so
I am sure he would not think it right faltered Amy
He Youll never have any more to say to him if you dont take care what you are about
I cant help it said Amy in a broken voice It is not right
Nonsense folly said Charles You are as bad as the rest When they are persecuting and slandering and acting in the most outrageous way against him and you know one word of yours would carry him through all you wont say it to save him from distraction and from doing all my father fancies he has done Then I believe you dont care a rush for him and never want to see him again and believe the whole monstrous farrago I vow Ill say so
O Charles you are very cruel said Amy with an irrepressible burst of weeping
Then if you dont believe it why cant you send one word to comfort him
She wept in silence for some moments at last she said—
It would not comfort him to think me disobedient He will trust me without and he will know what you think You are very kind dear Charlie but dont persuade me any more for I cant bear it I am going away now but dont fancy I am angry only I dont think I can sit by while you write that letter
Poor little Amy she seldom knew worse pain than at that moment when she was obliged to go away to put it out of her power to follow the promptings of her heart to send the few kind words which might prove that nothing could shake her love and trust
A fresh trial awaited her when she looked from her own window She saw Deloraine led out his chestnut neck glossy in the sun and William prepared for a journey and the other servants shaking hands and bidding him goodbye She saw him ride off and could hardly help flying back to her brother to exclaim O Charlie they have sent Deloraine away while the longing to send one kind greeting became more earnest than ever but she withstood it and throwing herself on the bed exclaimed—
He will never come back—never never and gave way unrestrainedly to a fit of weeping nor was it till this had spent itself that she could collect her thoughts
She was sitting on the side of her bed trying to compose herself when Laura came in
My own Amy—my poor dearest—I am very sorry
Thank you dear Laura and Amy gladly rested her aching head on her shoulder
I wish I knew what to do for you proceeded Laura You cannot cease to think about him and yet you ought
If I ought I suppose I can said Amy in a voice exhausted with crying
Thats right darling You will not be weak and pine for one who is not worthy
Not worthy Laura said Amy withdrawing her arm and holding up her head
Ah my poor Amy we thought—
Yes and it is so still I know it is so I know he did not do it
Then what do you think of Margaret and Philip
There is some mistake
And how can you defend what he said of papa
I dont said Amy hiding her face That is the worst but I am sure it was only a moments passion and that he must be very unhappy about it now I dont think papa would mind it at least not long if it was not for this other dreadful misapprehension O Laura why cannot something be done to clear it up
Everything will be done said Laura Papa has written to Mr Wellwood and Philip means to go and make inquiries at Oxford and St Mildreds
When asked Amy
Not till term begins You know he is to have a fortnights leave before the regiment goes to Ireland
Oh I hope it will come right then People must come to an understanding when they meet it is so different from writing
He will do everything to set things on a right footing You may be confident of that Amy for your sake as much as anything else
I cant think why he should know I have anything to do with it said Amy blushing I had much rather he did not
Surely Amy you think he can be trusted with your secret and there is no one who can take more care for you You must look on him as one of ourselves
Amy made no answer and Laura was annoyed
You are vexed with him for having told this to papa but that is not reasonable of you Amy your better sense must tell you that it is the only truly kind course both towards Guy and yourself
It was said in Philips manner which perhaps made it harder to bear and Amy could scarcely answer—
He means it for the best
You would not have had him be silent
I dont know said Amy sadly No he should have done something but he might have done it more kindly
Laura endeavoured to persuade her that nothing could have been more kind and judicious and Amy sat dejectedly owning the good intention and soothed by the affection of her family with the bitter suffering of her heart unallayed with all her fond tender feelings torn at the thought of what Guy must be enduring and with the pain of knowing it was her fathers work She had one comfort in the certainty that Guy would bear it nobly She was happy to find her confidence confirmed by her mother and Charles and one thing she thought she need not give up though she might no longer think of him as her lover she might be his Verena still whether he knew it or not It could not be wrong to remember any one in her prayers and to ask that he might not be led into temptation but have strength to abide patiently That helped her to feel that he was in the hands of One to whom the secrets of all hearts are known and a line of poetry seemed to be whispered in her ears in his own sweet tones—
Wait and the cloud shall roll away
So after the first day she went on pretty well She was indeed silent and grave and no longer the sunbeam of Hollywell but she took her share in what was passing and a common observer would hardly have remarked the submissive melancholy of her manner Her father was very affectionate and often called her his jewel of good girls but he was too much afraid of womens tears to talk to her about Guy he left that to her mother and Mrs Edmonstone having seen her submit to her fathers will was unwilling to say more
She doubted whether it was judicious to encourage her in dwelling on Guy for even supposing his character clear they had offended him deeply and released him from any engagement to her so that there was nothing to prevent him from forming an attachment elsewhere Mrs Edmonstone did not think he would but it was better to say nothing about him lest she should not speak prudently and only keep up the subject in Amys mind
Charles stormed and wrangled told Mr Edmonstone he was breaking his daughters heart that was all and talked of unfairness and injustice till Mr Edmonstone vowed it was beyond all bearing that his own son should call him a tyrant and accused Guy of destroying all peace in his family
The replies to the letters came some thought them satisfactory and the others wondered that they thought so Mr Wellwood gave the highest character of his pupil and could not imagine how any irregularities could be laid to his charge but when asked in plain terms how he disposed of his time could only answer in general that he had friends and engagements of his own at St Mildreds and its neighbourhood and had been several times at Mrs Henleys and at Colonel Harewoods The latter place unfortunately was the very object of Philips suspicions and thus the letter was anything but an exculpation
Guy wrote to Charles in the fulness of his heart expressing gratitude for his confidence and sympathy He again begged for the supposed evidence of his misconduct declaring he could explain it whatever it might be and proceeded to utter deep regrets for his hasty expressions
I do not know what I may have said he wrote I have no doubt it was unpardonable for I am sure my feelings were so and that I deserve whatever I have brought on myself I can only submit to Mr Edmonstones sentence and trust that time will bring to his knowledge that I am innocent of what I am accused of He has every right to be displeased with me
Charles pronounced this to be only Guys way of abusing himself but his father saw in it a disguised admission of guilt It was thought also to be bad sign that Guy intended to remain at South Moor till the end of the vacation though Charles argued that he must be somewhere and if they wished to keep him out of mischief why exile him from Hollywell He would hardly listen to his mothers representation that on Amys account it would not be right to have him there till the mystery was cleared up
He tried to stir his father up to go and see Guy at St Mildreds and investigate matters for himself but though Mr Edmonstone would have liked the appearance of being important this failed because Philip declared it to be unadvisable knowing that it would be no investigation at all and that his uncle would be talked over directly Next Charles would have persuaded Philip himself to go but the arrangements about his leave did not make this convenient and it was put off till he should pay his farewell visit to his sister in October Lastly Charles wrote to Mrs Henley entreating her to give him some information about this mysterious evidence which was wanting but her reply was a complete set down for interference in a matter with which he had no concern
He was very angry In fact the post seldom came in without occasioning a fresh dispute which only had the effect of keeping up the heat of Mr Edmonstones displeasure and making the whole house uncomfortable
Fretfulness and illhumour seemed to have taken possession of Charles and his father Such a state of things had not prevailed since Guys arrival Hollywell was hardly like the same house Mrs Edmonstone and Laura could do nothing without being grumbled at or scolded by one or other of the gentlemen even Amy now and then came in for a little petulance on her fathers part and Charles could not always forgive her for saying in her mournful submissive tome—It is of no use to talk about it
CHAPTER 18
This just decree alone I know
Man must be disciplined by woe
To me whateer of good or ill
The future brings since come it will
Ill bow my spirit and be still
—AESCHYLUS Anstices Translation
Guy in the meantime was enduring the storm in loneliness for he was unwilling to explain the cause of his trouble to his companions The only occasion of the suspicions which he could think of was his request for the sum of money and this he could not mention to Mr Wellwood nor was he inclined to make confidants of his other companions though pleasant rightminded youths
He had only announced that he had had a letter which had grieved him considerably but of which he could not mention the contents and as Harry Graham who knew something of the Broadstone neighbourhood had picked up a report that Sir Guy Morville was to marry Lady Eveleen de Courcy there was an idea among the party that there was some trouble in the way of his attachment He had once before been made by some joke to colour and look conscious and now this protected him from inconvenient questions and accounted for his depression He was like what he had been on first coming to Hollywell—grave and silent falling into reveries when others were talking and much given to long lonely wanderings Accustomed as he had been in boyhood to a solitary life in beautiful scenery there was something in a fine landscape that was to him like a friend and companion and he sometimes felt that it would have been worse if he had been in a dull uniform country instead of among mountain peaks and broad wooded valleys Working hard too helped him not a little and conic sections served him almost as well as they served Laura
A more real help was the neighbourhood of Stylehurst On the first Sunday after receiving Mr Edmonstones letter he went to church there instead of with the others to St Mildreds They thought it was for the sake of the solitary walk but he had other reasons for the preference In the first place it was a Communion Sunday and in the next he could feel more kindly towards Philip there and he knew he needed all that could strengthen such a disposition
Many a question did he ask himself to certify whether he wilfully entertained malice or hatred or any uncharitableness It was a long difficult examination but at its close he felt convinced that if such passions knocked at the door of his heart it was not at his own summons and that he drove them away without listening to them And surely he might approach to gain the best aid in that battle especially as he was certain of his strong and deep repentance for his fit of passion and longing earnestly for the pledge of forgiveness
The pardon and peace he sought came to him and in such sort that the comfort of that day when fresh from the first shock and waiting in suspense for some new blow was such as never to be forgotten They linked themselves with the grave shade of the clustered gray columns and the angel heads on roof of that old church with the long grass and tall yellow mullens among its churchyard graves and with the tints of the elmtrees that closed it in their leaves in masses either of green or yellow and opening here and there to show the purple hills beyond
He wandered in the churchyard between the services All enmity to Philip was absent now and he felt as if it would hardly return when he stood by the graves of the Archdeacon and of the two Frances Morvilles and thought what that spot was to his cousin There were a few flowers planted round Mrs Morvilles grave but they showed that they had long been neglected and no such signs of care marked her daughter Fannys And when Guy further thought of Mrs Henley and recollected how Philip had sacrificed all his cherished prospects and hopes of distinction and embraced an irksome profession for the sake of these two sisters he did not find it difficult to excuse the sternness severity and distrust which were an evidence how acutely a warm heart had suffered
Though he suffered cruelly from being cut off from Amy yet his reverence for her helped him to submit He had always felt as if she was too far above him and though he had beyond his hopes been allowed to aspire to the thought of her it was on trial and his failure his return to his old evil passions had sunk him beneath her He shuddered to think of her being united to anything so unlike herself and which might cause her so much misery it was wretchedness to think that even now she might be suffering for him and yet not for worlds would he have lost the belief that she was so feeling or the remembrance of the looks which had shone on him so sweetly and timidly as she sat at her mothers feet though that remembrance was only another form of misery But Amy would be tranquil pure and good whatever became of him and he should always be able to think of her looking like one of those peaceful spirits with bending head folded hands and a star on its brow in the Paradiso of Flaxman Her serenity would be untouched and though she might be lost to him he could still be content while he could look up at it through his turbid life Better she were lost to him than that her peace should be injured
He still of course earnestly longed to prove his innocence though his hopes lessened for as long as the evidence was withheld he had no chance After writing as strongly as he could he could do no more except watch for something that might unravel the mystery and Charless warm sympathy and readiness to assist him were a great comfort
He had not seen his uncle again perhaps Sebastian was ashamed to meet him after their last encounter and was still absent on his engagement but the wife and child were still at St Mildreds and one afternoon when Guy had rather unwillingly gone thither with Mr Wellwood he saw Mrs Dixon sitting on one of the benches which were placed on the paths cut out on the side of the hill looking very smart and smiling among several persons of her own class
To be ashamed to recognise her was a weakness beneath him he spoke to her and was leaving her pluming herself on his notice when he saw little Mariannes blue eyes fixed wistfully upon him and held out his hand to her She ran up to him joyfully and he led her a few steps from her mothers party Well little one how are you I have your piece of spar quite safe Have you said how dye do to Bustle
Bustle Bustle called the soft voice but it needed a whistle from his master to bring him to be caressed by the little girl
Have you been taking any more pleasant walks
Oh yes We have been all round these pretty paths And I should like to go to the top of this great high hill and see all round but mamma says she has got a bone in her leg and cannot go
Do you think mamma would give you leave to go up with me Should you like it
She coloured all over too happy even to thank him
Then said Guy to his tutor I will meet you here when you have done your business in the town in an hour or so Poor little thing she has not many pleasures
Mrs Dixon made no difficulty and was so profuse in thanks that Guy got out of her way as fast as he could and was soon on the soft thymy grass of the hillside the little girl frisking about him in great delight playing with Bustle and chattering merrily
Little Marianne was a delicate child and her frolic did not last long As the ascent became steeper her breath grew shorter and she toiled on in a resolute uncomplaining manner after his long vigorous steps till he looked round and seeing her panting far behind turned to help her lead her and carry her till the top was achieved and the little girl stood on the topmost stone gazing round at the broad sunny landscape with the soft green meadows the harvest fields the woods in their gorgeous autumn raiment and the moorland on the other side with its other peaks and cairns brown with withered bracken and shadowed in moving patches by the floating clouds The exhilarating wind brought a colour into her pale cheeks and her flossy curls were blowing over her face
He watched her in silence pleased and curious to observe how beautiful a scene struck the childish eye of the little Londoner The first thing she said after three or four minutes contemplation—a long time for such a child—was Oh I never saw anything so pretty then presently after Oh I wish little brother Felix was here
This is a pleasant place to think about your little brother said Guy kindly and she looked up in his face and exclaimed Oh do you know about Felix
You shall tell me said Guy Here sit on my knee and rest after your scramble
Mamma never lets me talk of Felix because it makes her cry said Marianne but I wish it sometimes
Her little heart was soon open It appeared that Felix was the last who had died the nearest in age to Marianne and her favourite playfellow She told of some of their sports in their London home speaking of them with eagerness and fondness that showed what joys they had been though to Guy they seemed but the very proof of dreariness and dinginess She talked of walks to school when Felix would tell what he would do when he was a man and how he took care of her at the crossings and how rude boys used to drive them and how they would look in at the shop windows and settle what they would buy if they were rich Then she talked of his being ill—ill so very long how he sat in his little chair and could not play and then always lay in bed and she liked to sit by him there but at last he died and they carried him away in a great black coffin and he would never come back again But it was so dull now there was no one to play with her
Though the little girl did not cry she looked very mournful and Guy tried to comfort her but she did not understand him Going to heaven only conveyed to her a notion of death and separation and this phrase together with a vague idea who had made her and that she ought to be good seemed to be the extent of the poor childs religious knowledge She hardly ever had been at church and though she had read one or two Bible stories it seemed to have been from their having been used as lessons at school She had a dim notion that good people read the Bible and there was one on the little table at home with the shellturkeycock standing upon it and mamma read it when Felix died but it was a big book and the shellturkeycock always stood upon it in short it seemed only connected with mammas tears and the loss of her brother
Guy was very much shocked and so deep in thought that he could hardly talk to the child in their progress down the hill but she was just so tired as to be inclined to silence and quite happy clinging to his hand till he delivered her over to her mother at the foot of the hill and went to join his tutor at the place appointed
Wellwood said he breaking silence when they had walked about half way back to the farm do you think your cousin would do me a great kindness You saw that child Well if the parents consent it would be the greatest charity on earth if Miss Wellwood would receive her into her school
On what terms What sort of an education is she to have
The chief thing she wants is to be taught Christianity poor child the rest Miss Wellwood may settle She is my first cousin I dont know whether you are acquainted with our family history and he went on to explain as much as was needful It ended in a resolution that if Miss Wellwood would undertake the charge the proposal should be made to Mrs Dixon
It was a way of assisting his relations likely to do real good and on the other hand he would be able under colour of the payment for the child to further Miss Wellwoods schemes and give her the interest of the thousand pounds until his five and twentieth year might put his property in his own power
Miss Wellwood readily consented much pleased with the simplicity and absence of false shame he showed in the whole transaction and very anxious for the good of a child in a class so difficult to reach He next went to Mrs Dixon expecting more difficulty with her but he found none She thought it better Marianne should live at St Mildreds than die in London and was ready to catch at the prospect of her being fitted for a governess Indeed she was so strongly persuaded that the rich cousin might make Mariannes fortune that she would have been very unwilling to interfere with the fancy he had taken for her
Little Marianne was divided between fear of leaving mamma and liking for St Mildreds but her first interview with Miss Wellwood and Miss Janes showing her a little white bed quite turned the scale in their favour Before the time came for Guys return to Oxford he had seen her settled heard her own account of her happy life and had listened to Miss Jane Wellwoods delight in her sweet temper and good disposition
Those thousand pounds Guy considered again and again whether he could explain their destination and whether this would clear him It seemed to him only a minor charge and besides his repugnance to mention such a design he saw too many obstacles in his way Captain Morville and his sister were the very persons from whom Miss Wellwoods project was to be kept secret Besides what would be gained It was evident that Guys own assertions were doubted and he could bring no confirmation of them he had never spoken of his intention to his tutor and Mr Wellwood could therefore say nothing in his favour If Mr Edmonstone alone had been concerned or if this had been the only accusation Guy might have tried to explain it but with Philip he knew it would be useless and therefore would not enter on the subject He could only wait patiently
CHAPTER 19
Most delicately hour by hour
He canvassed human mysteries
And stood aloof from other minds
Himself unto himself he sold
Upon himself himself did feed
Quiet dispassionate and cold
With chiselled features clear and sleek
—TENNYSON
Guy had been about a week at Oxford when one evening as he was sitting alone in his rooms he received an unexpected visit from Captain Morville He was glad for he thought a personal interview would remove all misconstructions and held out his hand cordially saying—
You here Philip When did you come
Half an hour ago I am on my way to spend a week with the Thorndales I go on tomorrow to my sisters
While speaking Philip was surveying the apartment for he held that a mans room is generally an indication of his disposition and assuredly there was a great deal of character in his own with the scrupulous neatness and fastidious taste of its arrangements Here he thought he could not fail to see traces of his cousins habits but he was obliged to confess to himself that there was very little to guide him The furniture was strictly as its former occupant had left it only rather the worse for wear and far from being in order The chairs were so heaped with books and papers that Guy had to make a clearance of one before his visitor could sit down but there was nothing else to complain of not even a trace of cigars but knowing him to be a great reader and lover of accomplishments Philip wondered that the only decorations were Lauras drawing of Sintram and a little print of Redclyffe and the books were chiefly such as were wanted for his studies the few others having for the most part the air of old library books as if he had sent for them from Redclyffe Was this another proof that he had some way of frittering away his money with nothing to show for it A Sophocles and a lexicon were open before him on the table and a blottingbook which he closed but not before Philip had caught sight of what looked like verses
Neither did his countenance answer Philips expectations It had not his usual bright lively expression there was a sadness which made him smile like a gleam on a showery day instead of constant sunshine but there was neither embarrassment nor defiance and the gleamlike smile was there as with a frank confiding tone he said—
This is very kind of you to come and see what you can do for me
Philip was by no means prepared to be thus met halfway but he thought Guy wanted to secure him as an intercessor and hardened himself into righteous severity
No one can be more willing to help you than I but you must in the first place help yourself
Instantly the sedate measured tone made Guys heart and head throb with impatience awakening all the former memories so hardly battled down but with the impulse of anger came the thought Here it is again If I dont keep it down now I am undone The enemy will seize me again He forced himself not to interrupt while Philip went calmly on
While you are not open nothing can be done
My only wish my only desire is to be open said Guy speaking fast and low and repressing the feeling which nevertheless affected his voice but the opportunity of explanation has never been given me
You need complain of that no longer I am here to convey to my uncle any explanation you may wish to address to him I will do my best to induce him to attend to it favourably but he is deeply offended and hurt by what has passed
I know—I know said Guy colouring deeply and all irritation disappearing from voice and manner I know there is no excuse for me I can only repeat that I am heartily sorry for whatever I may have said either of him or of you
Of course returned Philip I should never think of resenting what you may have said in a moment of irritation especially as you express regret for it Consider it as entirely overlooked on my part
Guy was nearly choked in uttering a Thank you which did not sound after all much like acceptance of forgiveness
Now to the real matter at issue said Philip the application for the money which so amazed Mr Edmonstone
I do not see that it is the point said Guy I wanted it for a scheme of my own he did not think fit to let me have it so there is an end of the matter
Mr Edmonstone does not think so He wishes to be convinced that you have not spent it beforehand
What would you have beyond my word and honour that I have not exclaimed Guy
Far be it from me to say that he doubts it said Philip and as at those words the flash of the Morville eye darted lightning he expected that the next moment Do you would be thundered forth and he could not with truth answer No but it was one of his maxims that a man need never be forced into an open quarrel and he tranquilly continued—but it is better not to depend entirely on assertion Why do you not bring him full proofs of your good intention and thus restore yourself to his confidence
I have said that I am bound not to mention the purpose
Unfortunate said Philip then while Guy bit his lip till it bled the pain really a relief by giving some vent to his anger at the implied doubt he went on—If it is impossible to clear this up the next advice I would give is that you should show what your expenditure has been lay your accounts before him and let them justify you
Most people would have resented this as an impertinent proposal were it only that doing so would have served to conceal the awkward fact that the accounts had not been kept at all Guy had never been taught to regard exactness in this respect as a duty had no natural taste for precision and did not feel responsible to any person nor if he had kept any could he have shown them without exposing his uncle To refuse would however be a subterfuge and after a moment he made an effort and confessed he had none to show though he knew Philip would despise him for it as a fool and probably take it as positive evidence against him
It would have been more bearable if Philip would but have said How foolish instead of drily repeating Unfortunate
After a pause during which Guy was not sufficiently master of himself to speak Philip added—Then this matter of the thousand pounds is to be passed over You have no explanation to offer
No and again he paused When my word is not accepted I have no more to say But this is not the point What I would know is what are the calumnies that accuse me of having gamed If you really wish to do me a service you will give me an opportunity of answering these precious proofs
I will answered Philip who could venture on doing so himself though for his sisters sake it was unsafe to trust Mr Edmonstone with whom what was not an absolute secret was not a secret at all My uncle knows that a thirty pound cheque of his in your name was paid by you to a notorious gamester
Guy did not shrink as he simply answered—It is true
Yet you have neither played nor betted nor done anything that could come under the definition of gambling
No
Then why this payment
I cannot explain that I know appearances are against me replied Guy steadily and with less irritation than he had hitherto shown I once thought my simple word would have sufficed but since it seems that will not do I will not again make what you call assertions
In fact while you profess a desire to be open and sincere a mystery appears at every turn What would you have us do
As you think fit he answered proudly
Philip had been used to feel mens wills and characters bend and give way beneath his superior force of mind They might like Charles chafe and rage but his calmness always gave him the ascendant almost without exertion and few people had ever come into contact with him without a certain submission of will or opinion With Guy alone it was not so he had been sensible of it once or twice before he had no mastery and could no more bend that spirit than a bar of steel This he could not bear for it obliged him to be continually making efforts to preserve his own sense of superiority
Since this is your ultimatum he said—since you deny your confidence and refuse any reply to these charges you have no right to complain of suspicion I shall do my best both as your true friend and as acting with your guardians authority to discover all that may lead to the elucidation of the mystery In the first place I am desired to make every inquiry here as to your conduct and expenditure I hope they will prove satisfactory
I am very much obliged to you answered Guy his voice stern and dignified and the smile that curled his lip was like Philips own
Philip was positively annoyed and desirous to say something to put him down but he had not committed himself by any vehemence and Philip was too cool and wise to compromise his own dignity so he rose to go saying Good night I am sorry I cannot induce you to act in the only way that can right you
Good night replied Guy in the same dignified manner in which he had spoken ever since his passion had been surmounted
They parted each feeling that matters were just where they were before Philip went back to his inn moralizing on the pride and perverseness which made it impossible to make any impression on a Redclyffe Morville whom not even the fear of detection could lead to submission
Next morning while Philip was hastily breakfasting the door opened and Guy entered pale and disturbed as if he had been awake all night
Philip said he in his frank natural voice I dont think we parted last night as your good intentions deserved
O ho thought Philip the fear of an investigation has brought him to reason and he said Well I am very glad you see things in a truer light this morning then asked if he had breakfasted He had and his cousin added
Have you anything to say on the matter we discussed last night
No I can only repeat that I am not guilty and wait for time to show my innocence I only came to see you once more that I might feel we parted friends
I shall always hope to be a true friend
I did not come here for altercation said Guy an answer rather to the spirit than the words so I will say no more If you wish to see me again you will find me in my rooms Goodbye
Philip was puzzled He wondered whether Guy had come wishing to propitiate him but had found pride indomitable at the last moment or whether he had been showing himself too severely just to admit entreaty He would be able to judge better after he had made his inquiries and he proceeded with them at once He met with no such replies as he expected Every one spoke of Sir Guy Morville in high terms as strict in his habits of application and irreproachable in conduct He was generally liked and some regret was expressed that he lived in so secluded a manner forming so few intimacies but no one seemed to think it possible that anything wrong could be imputed to him Philip could even perceive that there was some surprise that such inquiries should be made at all especially by so young a man as himself Mr Wellwood the person whom he most wished to see was not at Oxford but was at home preparing for his ordination
Nor could Philip get nearer to the solution of the mystery when he went to the tradesmen who were evidently as much surprised as the tutors and said he always paid in ready money Captain Morville felt like a lawyer whose case is breaking down no discoveries made nothing done but he was not one whit convinced of his cousins innocence thinking the college authorities blind and careless and the tradesmen combined to conceal their extortions or else that the mischief had been done at St Mildreds He was particularly provoked when he remembered Guys invitation to him to come to his rooms knowing as he must have done what would be the result of his inquiry
Philip was conscious that it would have been kind to have gone to say that so far he had found nothing amiss but he did not like giving Guy this passing triumph It made no difference in his real opinion and why renew a useless discussion He persuaded himself that he had left himself no time and should miss the train and hastened off to the station where he had to wait a quarter of an hour consoling himself with reflecting—
After all though I might have gone to him it would have been useless He is obstinate and occasions of irritating his unfortunate temper are above all to be avoided
One short year after what would not Philip have given for that quarter of an hour
By six oclock he was at St Mildreds greeted with delight by his sister and with cordiality by Dr Henley They were both proud of him and every tender feeling his sister had was for Philip her pet and her pupil in his childhood and her most valued companion and counsellor through her early womanhood
She had a picked dinnerparty to meet him for she knew the doctors conversation was not exactly the thing to entertain him through a whole evening and the guests might well think they had never seen a handsomer or more clever brother and sister than Mrs Henley and Captain Morville The old county families if they did wonder at her marriage were always glad to meet her brother and it was a great pleasure to him to see old friends
Only once did his sister in the course of the evening make him feel the difference of their sentiments and that was about Miss Wellwood Philip defended her warmly and when he heard that there was a plan getting up for excluding her from the hospital he expressed strong disapprobation at the time and after the guests were gone spoke upon the subject with his sister and her husband The doctor entered into no party questions and had only been stirred up to the opposition by his wife he owned that the Miss Wellwoods had done a great deal of good and made the nurses do their duty better than he had ever known and was quite ready to withdraw his opposition Mrs Henley argued about opinions but Philip was a match for her in her own line and the end of it was that though she would not allow herself to be convinced and shook her head at her brothers way of thinking he knew he had prevailed and that Miss Wellwood would be unmolested
There was not another person in the world to whom Margaret would have yielded and it served to restore him to the sense of universal dominion which had been a little shaken by his conversation with Guy
Sir Guy was a great deal with the Wellwoods said Mrs Henley
Was he indeed
O you need not think of that It would be too absurd The youngest must be twice his age
I was not thinking of any such thing said Philip smiling as he thought of the very different course Guys affections had taken
I did hear he was to marry Lady Eveleen de Courcy Is there anything in that report
No certainly not
I should pity the woman who married him after the specimen I saw of his temper
Poor boy said Philip
Lady Eveleen has been a great deal at Hollywell has she not I rather wondered my aunt should like to have her there considering all things
What things sister
Considering what a catch he would be for one of the Edmonstone girls
I thought you had just been pitying the woman who should marry him Perhaps my aunt had Lady Eveleen there to act as a screen for her own daughters
That our goodnatured aunt should have acted with such ultraprudence said Margaret laughing at his grave ironical tone Lady Eveleen is very pretty is she not A mere beauty I believe
Just so she is much admired but Guy is certainly not inclined to fall in love with her
I should have thought him the very man to fall in love young like his father Do you think there is any chance for either of the Edmonstones Lauras beauty he spoke of but it was not in a very loverlike way Do you admire Laura so much
She is very pretty
And little Amy
She is a mere child and will hardly ever be anything more but she is a very good little amiable thing
I wish poor Charless temper was improved
So do I but it is very far from improvement at present in consequence of his zeal for Guy Guy has been very attentive and good natured to him and has quite won his heart so that I should positively honour him for his championship if it was not in great degree out of opposition to his father and myself Tomorrow Margaret you must give me some guide to the most probable quarters for learning anything respecting this poor boys follies
Mrs Henley did her best in that way and Philip followed up his inquiries with great ardour but still unsuccessfully Jack White the hero of the draft was not at St Mildreds nor likely to be heard of again till the next races and whether Sir Guy had been on the raceground at all was a doubtful point Next Philip walked to Stylehurst to call on Colonel Harewood and see if he could learn anything in conversation with him but the Colonel did not seem to know anything and his sons were not at home Young Morville was he thought a spirited lad very good natured he had been out shooting once or twice with Tom and had a very fine spaniel If he had been at the races the Colonel did not know it he had some thoughts of asking him to join their party but had been prevented
This was no reason thought Philip why Guy might not have been with Tom Harewood without the Colonels knowledge Tom was just the man to lead him amongst those who were given to betting he might have been drawn in and perhaps he had given some pledge of payment when he was of age or possibly obtained an immediate supply of money from the old steward at Redclyffe who was devotedly attached to him If so Philip trusted to be able to detect it from the accounts on the other supposition there was no hope of discovery
The conversation with Colonel Harewood kept him so late that he had no time for going as usual to his old haunts at Stylehurst nor did he feel inclined just then to revive the saddening reflections they excited He spent the evening in talking over books with his sister and the next day proceeded on his journey to Thorndale Park
This was one of the places where he was always the most welcome ever since he had been a schoolboy received in a way especially flattering considering that the friendship was entirely owing to the uncompromising good sense and real kindness with which he had kept in order the follies of his former fag
Charles might laugh and call them the young man and young mans companion and Guy more classically term them the pious Aeneas and his fidus Achates but it was a friendship that did honour to both and the value that the Thorndales set upon Captain Morville was not misplaced and scarcely overrated Not particularly clever themselves they the more highly appreciated his endowments and were proud that James had been able to make such a friend for they knew as well as the rest of the world that Captain Morville was far from seeking the acquaintance for the sake of their situation in life but that it was from real liking and esteem How far this esteem was gained by the deference the whole family paid to his opinion was another question at any rate the courting was from them
The Miss Thorndales deemed Captain Morville the supreme authority in drawing literature and ecclesiastical architecture and whenever a person came in their way who was thought handsome always pronounced that he was not by any means equal to Jamess friend Lady Thorndale delighted to talk over James with him and thank him for his kindness and Lord Thorndale rather a pompous man himself liked his somewhat stately manners and talked politics with him sincerely wishing he was his neighbour at Redclyffe and calculating how much good he would do there Philip listened with interest to accounts of how the Thorndale and Morville influence had always divided the borough of Moorworth and if united might dispose of it at will and returned evasive answers to questions what the young heir of Redclyffe might be likely to do
James Thorndale drove his friend to Redclyffe as Philip had authority from Mr Edmonstone to transact any business that might be required with Markham the steward and as has been said before he expected to discover in the accounts something that might explain why Guy had ceased to press for the thousand pounds However he could find nothing amiss in them though—bearing in mind that it is less easy to detect the loss of a score of sheep than of one—he subjected them to a scrutiny which seemed by no means agreeable to the gruff old grumbling steward He also walked about the park saw to the marking of certain trees that were injuring each other and finding that there was a misunderstanding between Markham and the new rector Mr Ashford about certain parish matters where the clergyman was certainly right he bore down Markhams opposition with Mr Edmonstones weight and felt he was doing good service
He paused at the gate and looked back at the wide domain and fine old house He pitied them and the simplehearted honest tenantry for being the heritage of such a family and the possession of one so likely to misuse them instead of training them into the means of conferring benefits on them on his country What would not Philip himself do if those lands were his—just what was needed to give his talents free scope and what would it be to see his beautiful Laura their mistress
CHAPTER 20
The longing for ignoble things
The strife for triumph more than truth
The hardening of the heart that brings
Irreverence for the dreams of youth
—LONGFELLOW
After his week at Thorndale Park Captain Morville returned to make his farewell visit at Hollywell before joining his regiment at Cork whence it was to sail for the Mediterranean He reckoned much on this visit for not even Laura herself could fathom the depth of his affection for her strengthening in the recesses where he so sternly concealed it and viewing her ever as more faultless since she had been his own While she was his noble strongminded generous fond Laura he could bear with his disappointment in his sister with the loss of his home and with the trials that had made him a grave severe man She had proved the strength of her mind by the self-command he had taught her and for which he was especially grateful to her as it made him safer and more unconstrained able to venture on more demonstration than in those early days when every look had made her blush and tremble
Mr Edmonstone brought the carriage to fetch him from the station and quickly began—
I suppose as you have not written you have found nothing out
Nothing
And you could do nothing with him Eh
No I could not get a word of explanation nor break through the fence of pride and reserve I must do him the justice to say that he bears the best of characters at Oxford and if there were any debts I could not get at them from the tradesmen
Well well say no more about it he is an ungrateful young dog and I am sick of it I only wish I could wash my hands of him altogether It was mere folly to expect any of that set could ever come to good Theres everything going wrong all at once now poor little Amy breaking her heart after him and worse than all theres poor Charlie laid up again said Mr Edmonstone one of the most affectionate people in the world but his maundering mood making him speak of Charless illness as if he only regarded it as an additional provocation for himself
Charles ill exclaimed Philip
Yes another of those formations in the joint I hoped and trusted that was all over now but he is as bad as ever—has not been able to move for a week and goodness knows when he will again
Indeed I am very sorry Is there as much pain as before
Oh yes He has not slept a wink these four nights Mayerne talks of opium but he says he wont have it till he has seen you he is so anxious about this unlucky business If anything could persuade me to have Guy back again it would be that this eternal fretting after him is so bad for poor Charlie
It is on Amys account that it is impossible to have him here said Philip
Ay He shall never set eyes on Amy again unless all this is cleared up which it never will be as I desire mamma to tell her By the bye Philip Amy said something of your having a slip with Charles on the stairs
There was very nearly an accident but I believed he was not hurt I hope it has nothing to do with this illness
He says it was all his own fault said Mr Edmonstone and that he should have been actually down but for you
But is it really thought it can have caused this attack
I can hardly suppose so but Thompson fancies there may have been some jar However dont distress yourself I dare say it would have come on all the same
Philip did not like to be forgiven by Mr Edmonstone and there was something very annoying in having this mischance connected with his name though without his fault nor did he wish Charles to have the kind of advantage over him that might be derived from seeming to pass over his share in the misfortune
When they arrived at Hollywell it was twilight but no one was in the drawingroom generally so cheerful at that time of day the fire had lately been smothered with coals and looked gloomy and desolate Mr Edmonstone left Philip there and ran up to see how Charles was and soon after Laura came in sprang to his side and held his hand in both hers
You bring no good news said she sadly as she read the answer in his face O how I wish you had It would be such a comfort now You have heard about poor Charlie
Yes and very sorry I am But Laura is it really thought that accident could have occasioned it
Dr Mayerne does not think so only Mr Thompson talked of remote causes when Amy mentioned it I dont believe it did any harm and Charlie himself says you saved him from falling downstairs
Philip had begun to give Laura his version of the accident as he had already done to her father when Mrs Edmonstone came down looking harassed and anxious She told her nephew that Charles was very desirous to see him and sent him up at once
There was a fire in the dressingroom and the door was open into the little room which was only lighted by a lamp on a small table where Amy was sitting at work After shaking hands she went away leaving him alone with Charles who lay in his narrow bed against the wall fixed in one position his forehead contracted with pain his eyelids red and heavy from sleeplessness his eyes very quick and eager and his hands and arms thrown restlessly outside the coverings
I am very sorry to find you here said Philip coming up to him and taking rather than receiving his hot limp hand Is the pain very bad
That is a matter of course said Charles in a sharp quick manner his voice full of suffering I want to hear what you have been doing at Oxford and St Mildreds
I am sorry I do not bring the tidings you wish
I did not expect you would I know you too well but I want to hear what you have been doing—what he said answered Charles in short impatient sentences
It can be of no use Charlie You are not in a state to enter on agitating subjects
I tell you I will hear all returned Charles with increased asperity I know you will say nothing to his advantage that you can help but still I know you will speak what you think the truth and I want to judge for myself
You speak as if I was not acting for his good
Palaver cried Charles fully sensible of the advantage his illness gave him I want the facts Begin at the beginning Sit down—theres a chair by you Now tell me where did you find him
Philip could not set Charles down in his present state and was obliged to submit to a crossexamination in which he showed no abatement of his natural acuteness and unsparing as he always was laid himself under no restraint at all Philip was compelled to give a full history of his researches and if he had afforded no triumph to Guy Charles revenged him
Pray what did Guy say when he heard the result of this fine voyage of discovery
I did not see him again
Not see him not tell him he was so far justified
I had no time—at least I thought not It would have been useless for while these mysteries continue my opinion is unchanged and there was no benefit in renewing vain disputes
Say no more exclaimed Charles You have said all I expected and more too I gave you credit for domineering and prejudice now I see it is malignity
As he spoke Laura entered from the dressingroom and stood aghast at the words and then looked imploringly at her cousin Dr Mayerne was following her and Charles called out—
Now doctor give me as much opium as you please I only want to be stupefied till the world has turned round and then you may wake me
Philip shook hands with Dr Mayerne and without betraying a shade of annoyance wished Charles good night but Charles had drawn the coverings over his head and would not hear him
Poor fellow said Philip to Laura when they were out of the room He is a very generous partisan and excitement and suffering make him carry his zeal to excess
I knew you could not be angry with him
I could not be angry at this time at far more provocation given by any one belonging to you Laura
Lauras heart had that sensation which the French call se serrer as she heard him allude to the long separation to which there seemed no limit but they could say no more
Amy said Charles when she returned to him after dinner I am more than ever convinced that things will right themselves I never saw prejudice more at fault
Did he tell you all about it
I worked out of him all I could and it is my belief Guy had the best of it I only wonder he did not horsewhip Philip round the quadrangle I wish he had
Oh no no But he controlled himself
If he had not we should have heard of it fast enough and Charles told what he had been able to gather while she sat divided between joy and pain
Philip saw very little more of Charles He used to come to ask him how he was once a day but never received any encouragement to lengthen his visit These gatherings in the diseased joint were always excessively painful and were very long in coming to the worst as well as afterwards in healing and through the week of Philips stay at Hollywell Charles was either in a state of great suffering or else heavy and confused with opiates His mothers whole time and thoughts were absorbed in him she attended to him day and night and could hardly spare a moment for anything else Indeed with all her affection and anxiety for the young lovers Charles was so entirely her engrossing object that her first feeling of disappointment at the failure of Philips journey of investigation was because it would grieve Charlie She could not think about Guy just then and for Amy there was nothing for it but patience and good little creature it was very nice to see her put her own troubles aside and be so cheerful a nurse to her brother She was almost always in his room for he liked to have her there and she could not conquer a certain shrinking from Philip
Laura had once pleaded hard and earnestly for Guy with Philip but all in vain she was only taught to think the case more hopeless than before Laura was a very kind nurse and sister but she could better be spared than her mother and Amy so that it generally fell to her lot to be downstairs making the drawingroom habitable Dr Mayerne whenever Charles was ill used to be more at Hollywell than at his own house and there were few days that he did not dine there When Amy was out of the way Philip used to entertain them with long accounts of Redclyffe how fine a place it was how far the estate reached on the Moorworth road of its capacities for improvement wastes of moorland to be enclosed or planted magnificent timber needing nothing but thinning He spoke of the number of tenantry and the manorial rights and the influence in both town and county which in years gone by had been proved to the utmost in many a fierce struggle with the house of Thorndale Sir Guy Morville might be one of the first men in England if he were not wanting to himself Mr Edmonstone enjoyed such talk for it made him revel in the sense of his own magnanimity in refusing his daughter to the owner of all this and Laura sometimes thought how Philip would have graced such a position yet how much greater it was to rest entirely on his own merits
Ah my fine fellow muttered Dr Mayerne to himself one day when
Philip and his uncle had left the room just after a discourse of this
kind I see you have not forgotten you are the next heir
Laura coloured with indignation exclaimed Oh then checked
herself as if such an aspersion was not worthy of her taking the
trouble to refute it
Ah Miss Edmonstone I did not know you were there
Yes you were talking to yourself just as if you were at home said Charlotte who was specially pert to the old doctor because she knew herself to be a great pet You were telling some home truths to make Laura angry
Well he would make a very good use of it if he had it said the doctor
Now youll make me angry said Charlotte and you have not mended matters with Laura She thinks nothing short of foursyllabled words good enough for Philip
Hush nonsense Charlotte said Laura much annoyed
There Charlotte she is avenging herself on you because she cant scold me said the doctor pretending to whisper
Charlotte is only growing more wild than ever for want of mamma said Laura trying to laugh it off but there was so much annoyance evident about her that Dr Mayerne said—
Seriously I must apologize for my unlucky soliloquy not that I thought I was saying much harm for I did not by any means say or think the Captain wished Sir Guy any ill and few men who stood next in succession to such a property would be likely to forget it
Yes but Philip is not like other men said Charlotte who at fourteen had caught much of her brothers power of repartee and could be quite as provoking when unrestrained by any one whom she cared to obey
Laura felt it was more for her dignity not to notice this and replied with an effort for a laugh—
It must be your guilty conscience that sets you apologizing for you said no harm as you observe
Yes said Dr Mayerne goodhumouredly He does very well without it and no doubt he would be one of the first men in the country if he had it but it is in very good hands now on the whole I dont think even if the lad has been tempted into a little folly just now that he can ever go very far wrong
No indeed said Charlotte but Charlie and I dont believe he has done anything wrong
She spoke in a little surly decided tone as if her opinion put an end to the matter and Philips return closed the discussion
Divided as the party were between upstairs and downstairs and in the absence of Charless shrewd observation Philip and Laura had more opportunity of intercourse than usual and now that his departure would put an end to suspicion they ventured on more openly seeking each other It never could be the perfect freedom that they had enjoyed before the avowal of their sentiments but they had many brief conversations giving Laura feverish but exquisite delight at each renewal of his rare expressions of tenderness
What are you going to do today he asked on the last morning before he was to leave Hollywell I must see you alone before I go
She looked down and he kept his eyes fixed on her rather sternly for he had never before made a clandestine appointment and he did not like feeling ashamed of it At last she said—
I go to Easthill School this afternoon I shall come away at halfpast three
Mary Ross was still absent her six nephews and nieces having taken advantage of her visit to have the measles not like reasonable children all at once so as to be one trouble but one after the other so as to keep Aunt Mary with them as long as possible and Mr Ross did not know what would have become of the female department of his parish but for Laura who worked at schoolkeeping indefatigably
Laura had some difficulty in shaking off Charlottes company this afternoon and was obliged to make the most of the probability of rain and the dreadful dirt of the roads Indeed she represented it as so formidable that Mrs Edmonstone who had hardly time to look out of window much less to go out of doors strongly advised her to stay at home herself and Charlotte grew all the more eager for the fun Luckily however for Laura Dr Mayerne came in laughing at the reports of the weather and as he was wanted to prescribe for a poor old man in an opposite direction he took Charlotte with him to show the way and she was much better pleased to have him for a companion than the grave Laura
Philip in the meantime had walked all the way to Broadstone timing his return exactly that he might meet Laura as she came out of the school and feel as if it had been by chance It was a gray misty November day and the leaves of the elmtrees came floating round them yellow and damp
You have had a wet walk said Laura as they met
It is not quite raining he answered and they proceeded for some minutes in silence until he said—It is time we should come to an understanding
She looked at him in alarm and his voice was immediately gentler indeed at times it was almost inaudible from his strong emotion I believe that no affection has ever been stronger or truer than ours
Has been repeated Laura in a wondering bewildered voice
And is if you are satisfied to leave things as they are
I must be if you are
I will not say I am satisfied with what must be as I am situated but I felt it due to you to set the true state of the case before you Few would venture their love as I do mine with you bound in reality though not formally with no promise sought or given yet I am not more assured that I stand here than I am that our love is for ever
I am sure it is she repeated fervently O Philip there never was a time I did not love you and since that day on Ashen Down I have loved you with my whole heart I am sometimes afraid it has left no proper room for the rest when I find how much more I think of your going away than of poor Charles
Yes he said you have understood me as none but you would have done through coldness and reserve apparently even towards yourself and when to others I have seemed grave and severe beyond my years You have never doubted you have recognized the warmth within you have trusted your happiness to me and it shall be safe in my keeping for Laura it is all mine
There is only one thing said Laura timidly would it not be better if mamma knew
Laura I have considered that but remember you are not bound I have never asked you to bind yourself You might marry tomorrow and I should have no right to complain There is nothing to prevent you
She exclaimed as if with pain
True he answered you could not and that certainty suffices me I ask no more without your parents consent but it would be giving them and you useless distress and perplexity to ask it now They would object to my poverty and we should gain nothing for I would never be so selfish as to wish to expose you to such a life as that of the wife of a poor officer and an open engagement could not add to our confidence in each other We must be content to wait for my promotion By that time—he smiled gravely—our attachment will have lasted so many years as to give it a claim to respect
It is no new thing
No newer than our lives but remember my Laura that you are but twenty
You have made me feel much older sighed Laura not that I would be a thoughtless child again That cannot last long not even for poor little Amy
No one would wish to part with the deeper feelings of elder years to regain the carelessness of childhood even to be exempted from the suffering that has brought them
No indeed
For instance these two years have scarcely been a time of great happiness to you
Sometimes whispered Laura sometimes beyond all words but often dreary and oppressive
Heaven knows how unwillingly I have rendered it so Rather than dim the brightness of your life I would have repressed my own sentiments for ever
But then where would have been my brightness
I would I say but for a peril to you I see my fears were unfounded You were safe but in my desire to guard you from what has come on poor Amy my feelings though not wont to overpower me carried me further than I intended
Did they
Do not suppose I regret it No no Laura those were the most precious moments in my life when I drew from you those words and looks which have been blessed in remembrance ever since and doubly knowing as I do that you also prize that day
Yes—yes—
In the midst of much that was adverse and with a necessity for a trust and selfcontrol of which scarce a woman but yourself would have been capable you have endured nobly—
I could bear anything if you were not going so far away
You will bear that too Laura and bravely It will not be for ever
How long do you think
I cannot tell Several years may pass before I have my promotion It may be that I shall not see that cheek in its fresh bloom again but I shall find the same Laura that I left the same in love and strength and trust
Ah I shall grow faded and gray and you will be a sunburnt old soldier said Laura smiling and looking half sadly half proudly up to his noble features but hearts dont change like faces
After they came near the house they walked up and down the lane for a long time for Philip avoided a less public path in order to keep up his delusion that he was doing nothing in an underhand way It grew dark and the fog thickened straightening Lauras auburn ringlets and hanging in dewdrops on Philips rough coat but little recked they it was such an hour as they had never enjoyed before Philip had never so laid himself open or assured her so earnestly of the force of his affection and her thrills of ecstasy overcame the desolate expectation of his departure and made her sensible of strength to bear seven ten twenty years of loneliness and apparent neglect She knew him and he would never fail her
Yet when at last they went indoors and Amy followed her to her room wondering to find her so wet and so late who could have seen the two sisters without reading greater peace and serenity in the face of the younger
Philip felt an elder brothers interest for poor little Amy He did not see much of her but he compassionated her as a victim to her mothers imprudence hoping she would soon be weaned from her attachment He thought her a good patient little thing so soft and gentle as probably not to have the strength and depth that would make the love incurable and the better he liked her the more unfit he thought her for Guy It would have been uniting a dove and a tiger and his only fear was that when he was no longer at hand Mr Edmonstones weak goodnature might be prevailed on to sacrifice her He did his best for her protection by making his uncle express a resolution never to admit Guy into his family again unless the accusation of gambling was completely disproved
The last morning came and Philip went to take leave of Charles Poor Charles was feebler by this time and too much subdued by pain and languor to receive him as at first but the spirit was the same and when Philip wished him goodbye saying he hoped soon to hear he was better he returned for answer
Goodbye Philip I hope soon to hear you are better I had rather have my hip than your mind
He was in no condition to be answered and Philip repeated his goodbye little thinking how they were to meet again
The others were assembled in the hall His aunts eyes were full of tears for she loved him dearly her brothers only son early left motherless whom she had regarded like her own child and who had so nobly fulfilled all the fondest hopes All his overbearing ways and uncalledfor interference were forgotten and her voice gave way as she embraced him saying
God bless you Philip wherever you may be We shall miss you very much
Little Amys hand was put into his and he squeezed it kindly but she could hardly speak her goodbye for the tears that came because she was grieved not to feel more sorry that her highlyesteemed cousin so kind and condescending to her was going away for so very long a time
Goodbye Philip said Charlotte I shall be quite grown up by the time you come home
Dont make such uncivil auguries Puss said her father but Philip heard her not for he was holding Lauras hand in a grasp that seemed as if it never would unclose
CHAPTER 21
I will sing for I am sad
For many my misdeeds
It is my sadness makes me glad
For love for sorrow pleads
—WILLIAMS
After his last interview with Philip Guy returned to his rooms to force himself into occupation till his cousin should come to acknowledge that here at least there was nothing amiss He trusted that when it was proved all was right in this quarter the prejudice with regard to the other might be diminished though his hopes were lower since he had found out the real grounds of the accusation reflecting that he should never be able to explain without betraying his uncle
He waited in vain The hour passed at which Philips coming was possible Guy was disappointed but looked for a letter but post after post failed to bring him one Perhaps Philip would write from Hollywell or else Mr Edmonstone would write or at least he was sure that Charles would write—Charles whose confidence and sympathy expressed in almost daily letters had been such a comfort But not a line came He reviewed in memory his last letter to Charles wondering whether it could have offended him but it did not seem possible he thought over all that Philip could have learnt in his visit to see if it could by any means have been turned to his disadvantage But he knew he had done nothing to which blame could be attached he had never infringed the rules of college discipline and though still backward and unlikely to distinguish himself he believed that was the worst likely to have been said of him He only wished his true character was as good as what would be reported of him
As he thought and wondered he grew more and more restless and unhappy He could imagine no reason for the silence unless Mr Edmonstone had absolutely forbidden any intercourse and it did not seem probable that he would issue any commands in a manner to bind a grownup son more especially as there had been no attempt at communication with Amy It was terrible thus without warning to be cut off from her and all besides that he loved As long as Charles wrote he fancied her sitting by perhaps sealing the letter and he could even tell by the kind of paper and envelope whether they were sitting in the dressingroom or downstairs but now there was nothing no assurance of sympathy no word of kindness they might all have given him up those unhappy words were like a barrier cutting him off for ever from the happiness of which he had once had a glimpse Was the Redclyffe doom of sin and sorrow really closing in upon him
If it had not been for chapel and study he hardly knew how he should have got through that term but as the end of it approached a feverish impatience seized on him whenever the post came in for a letter if only to tell him not to come to Hollywell None came and he saw nothing for it but to go to Redclyffe and if he dreaded seeing it in its altered state when his spirits were high and unbroken how did he shrink from it now He did however make up his mind for he felt that his reluctance almost wronged his own beloved home Harry Graham wanted to persuade him to come and spend Christmas at his home with his lively family but Guy felt as if gaiety was not for him even if he could enjoy it He did not wish to drown his present feelings and steadily though gratefully refused this as well as one or two other friendly invitations
After lingering in vain till the last day of term he wrote to desire that his own room and the library might be made ready for him and that something might be sent to meet him at Moorworth
Railroads had come a step nearer even to his remote corner of the world in the course of the last three years but there was still thirty miles of coach beyond and these lay through a part of the country he had never seen before It was for the most part bleak dreary moor such as under the cold gray wintry sky presented nothing to rouse him from his musings on the welcome he might have been at that very moment receiving at Hollywell
A sudden dip in the high ground made it necessary for the coach to put on the drag and thus it slowly entered a village which attracted attention from its wretched appearance The cottages of the rough stone of the country were little better than hovels slates were torn off windows broken Wildlooking uncombed women in garments of universal dirt colour stood at the doors ragged children ran and shrieked after the coach the church had a hole in the roof and stood tottering in spite of rude repairs the churchyard was trodden down by cattle and the whole place only resembled the pictures of Irish dilapidation
What miserable place is this asked a passenger Yes thats what all gentlemen ask replied the coachman and well you may Theres not a more noted place for thieves and vagabonds They call it Coombe Prior
Guy well knew the name though he had never been there It was a distant offset of his own property and a horrible sense of responsibility for all the crime and misery there came over him
Is there no one to look after it continued the traveller No squire no clergyman
A foxhunting parson answered the coachman who lives halfadozen miles off and gallops over for the service
Guy knew that the last presentation had been sold in the days of his grandfathers extravagance and beheld another effect of ancestral sin
Do you know who is the owner of the place
Yes sir tis Sir Guy Morville You have heard tell of the old Sir Guy Morville for he made a deal of noise in the world
What The noted—
I ought not to allow you to finish your sentence said Guy very courteously without telling you that I am his grandson
I beg your pardon exclaimed the traveller
Nay said Guy with a smile I only thought it was fair to tell you
Sir Guy himself said the coachman turning round and touching his hat anxious to do the honours of his coach I have not seen you on this road before sir for I never forget a face I hope youll often be this way
After a few more civilities Guy was at liberty to attend to the fresh influx of sad musings on thoughtless waste affecting not only the destiny of the individual himself but whole generations besides How many souls might it not have ruined These sheep what had they done His grandfather had repented but who was to preach repentance unto these He did not wonder now that his own hopes of happiness had been blighted he only marvelled that a bright present or future had ever been his—
While souls were wandering far and wide
And curses swarmed on every side
The traveller was meanwhile observing the heir of Redclyffe possessor of wealth and wide lands Little did he guess how that brighteyed youth looked upon his riches
Miles were passed in one long melancholy musing till Guy was roused by the sight of familiar scenes and found himself rattling over the stones of the little borough of Moorworth with the gray largewindowed oldfashioned houses on each side looking at him with friendly eyes There behind those limes cut out in arches was the commercial school where he had spent many an hour in construing with patient Mr Potts and though he had now a juster appreciation of his old masters erudition which he had once thought so vast he recollected with veneration his long and patient submission to an irksome uncongenial life Rumbling on the coach was in the square marketplace the oddlooking octagon markethouse in the middle and the inn—the respectable old George—with its long rank of stables and outbuildings forming one side It was at this inn that Guy had been born and the mistress having been the first person who had him in her arms considered herself privileged to have a great affection for him and had delighted in the greetings he always exchanged with her when he put up his pony at her stable and went to his tutor
There was a certainty of welcome here that cheered him as he swung himself from the roof of the coach lifted Bustle down and called out to the barmaid that he hoped Mrs Lavers was well
The next moment Mrs Lavers was at the door herself with her broad goodhumoured face close cap bright shawl and black gown just as Guy always recollected and might if he could have recollected when he was born If she had any more guests she neither saw nor cared for them her welcome was all for him and he could not but smile and look cheerful if only that he might not disappoint her feeling in very truth cheered and gratified by her cordiality If he was in a hurry he would not show it and he allowed her to seat him in her own peculiar abode behind the glasscases of tongue and cold chicken told her he came from Oxford admired her good fire and warmed his hands over it before he even asked if the something had arrived which was to take him home It was coming to the door at the moment and proved to be Mr Markhams tall highwheeled gig drawn by the old whitefaced chestnut and driven by Markham himself—a short sturdy brownred honestfaced old man with frosted hair and whiskers an air more of a yeoman than of a lawyer and though not precisely gentlemanlike yet not ungentlemanlike as there was no pretension about him
Guy darted out to meet him and was warmly shaken by the hand though the meeting was gruff
So Sir Guy how dye do I wonder what brings you here on such short notice Good morning Mrs Lavers Bad roads this winter
Good morning Mr Markham It is a treat indeed to have Sir Guy here once more so grown too
Grown—hum said Markham surveying him I dont see it Hell never be as tall as his father Have you got your things Sir Guy Ay thats the way—care for nothing but the dog Gone on by the coach most likely
They might have been for aught Guy knew to the contrary but Boots had been more attentive and they were right Mrs Lavers begged he would walk in and warm himself but Markham answered—
What do you say Sir Guy The road is shocking and it will be as dark as a pit by the time we get home
Very well we wont keep old Whiteface standing said Guy Goodbye Mrs Lavers thank you I shall see you again before long
Before Markham had finished a short private growl on the shocking state of the Moorworth pavement and a protest that somebody should be called over the coals Guy began—
What a horrible place Coombe Prior is
I only know I wish you had more such tenants as Todd was Markhams answer Pays his rent to a day and improves his land
But what sort of man is he
A capital farmer A regular screw I believe but that is no concern of mine
There are all the cottages tumbling down
Ay Are they I shouldnt wonder for they are all in his lease and he would not lay out an unproductive farthing And a precious bad lot they are there too There were actually three of them poaching in Cliffstone hanger this autumn but we have them in jail A pretty pass of impudence to be coming that distance to poach
Guy used to be kindled into great wrath by the most distant hint of poachers but now he cared for men not for game and instead of asking as Markham expected the particulars of their apprehension continued—
The clergyman is that Halroyd is he not
Yes every one knows what he is I declare it went against me to take his offer for the living but it could not be helped Money must be had but there least said soonest mended
We must mend it said Guy so decidedly that Markham looked at him with surprise
I dont see whats to be done till Halroyd dies and then you may give the living to whom you please He lives so hard he cant last long that is one comfort
Guy sighed and pondered and presently Markham resumed the conversation
And what has brought you home at a moments notice You might as well have written two or three days before at least
I was waiting in hopes of going to Hollywell said Guy sorrowfully
Well and what is the matter You have not been quarrelling with your guardian I hope and trust Going the old way after all exclaimed Markham not in his usual gruff grumbling note but with real anxiety and almost mournfulness
He took up some unjust suspicion of me I could not bear it patiently and said something that has offended him
Oh Sir Guy hot and fiery as ever I always told you that hasty temper would be the ruin of you
Too true said Guy so dejectedly that the old man instantly grew kinder and was displeased with Mr Edmonstone
What could he have taken into his head to suspect you of
Of gaming at St Mildreds
You have not
Never
Then why does not he believe you
He thinks he has proof against me I cant guess how he discovered it but I was obliged to pay some money to a gambling sort of man and he thinks I lost it
Then why dont you show him your accounts
For one reason—because I have kept none
As if it was an immense relief to his mind Markham launched out into a discourse on the extreme folly imprudence and all other evils of such carelessness He was so glad to find this was the worst that his lecture lasted for two miles and a half during which Guy though attentive at first had ample space for all the thrills of recognition at each wellknown spot
There was the long greenwooded valley between the hills where he had shot his first woodcock there was the great stone on which he had broken his best knife in a fit of geological research there was the pool where he used to skate there the sudden break in the lulls that gave the first view of the sea He could not help springing up at the sight—pale leaden and misty as it was and though Markham forthwith rebuked him for not listening his heart was still beating as at the first sight of a dear old friend when that peep was far behind More black heaths with stacks of peat and withered ferns Guy was straining his eyes far off in the darkness to look for the smoke of the old keepers cottage chimney and could with difficulty refrain from interrupting Markham to ask after the old man
Another long hill and then began a descent into a rich valley beautiful fields of young wheat reddish soil full of fatness large spreading trees with noble limbs cottages and cottage gardens very unlike poor Coombe Prior Markhams house—a perfect little snuggery covered all over with choice climbing plants the smart plastered doctors house the Morville Arms looking honest and venerable the church with its disproportionately high tower the parsonage rather hidden behind it and on the opposite side of the road the parkwall and the gate where old Sarah stood in an ecstasy of curtsies
Guy jumped out to meet her and to spare Whiteface for there was a sharp steep bit of hill rising from the lodge trying to horses in spite of the road being cut out in long spirals On he ran leaving the road to Markham straight up the high steep slippery green slope He came in sight at the great darkred sandstone pile of building but he passed it and ran on to where the ground rose on one side of it still more abruptly and at the highest point was suddenly broken away and cut off into a perpendicular crag descending in some parts sheer down to the sea in others a little broken and giving space for the growth of stunted brushwood He stood at the highest point where the precipice was most abrupt The sea was dashing far beneath the ripple dash and roar were in his ears once more the wind—such wind as only blows over the sea—was breathing on his face the broad free horizon far before him the field of waves in gray and brown shade indeed but still his own beloved waves the bay shut in with rocks and with Black Shag Island and its train of rocks projecting far out to the west and almost immediately beneath him to the left the little steep street of the fishing part of the village nestled into the cove which was formed by the mouth of a little mountainstream and the dozen boats it could muster rocking on the water
Guy stood and looked as if he could never cease looking or enjoying the sea air and salt breeze It was real pleasure at first for there were his home his friends and though there was a throb and tightness of heart at thinking how all was changed but such as this and how all must change how he had talked with Amy of this very thing and had longed to have her standing beside him there yet there was more of soothing than suffering in the sensation
So many thoughts rushed through his mind that he fancied he had stood there a long time when he turned and hastened down again but he had been so rapid as to meet Markham before the servants had had time to miss him
The servants were indeed few There was alas William of Deloraine waiting to hold Whiteface there was Arnaud an old Swiss first courier and then butler to old Sir Guy there was Mrs Drew the housekeeper also a very old servant and these were all but their welcome was of the heartiest in feeling if not in demonstration as the gig went with an echoing thundering sound under the deep archway that led into the paved quadrangle round which the house was built that court where as Philip had truly averred the sun hardly ever shone so high were the walls on each side
Up the stone steps into the spacious dark hall and into the large gloomy library partially lighted by a great wood fire replying to Mrs Drews questions about his dinner and his room and asking Markham to stay and dine with him Guy at length found himself at home in the very room where he had spent every evening of his boyhood with the same green leather armchair in the very place where his grandfather used to sit
Markham consented to dine with him and the evening was spent in talking over the news of Redclyffe Markham spoke with much bitterness of the way in which Captain Morville had taken upon him his looking into the accounts though any one was welcome to examine them was he thought scarcely becoming in so young a man—the heiratlaw too
He cant help doing minutely whatever he undertakes said Guy If you had him here you would never have to scold him like me
Heaven forbid said Markham hastily I know the same place would not hold him and me long
You have told me nothing of our new vicar How do you get on with him
None the better for that same Captain Morville replied Markham plunging forthwith into his list of grievances respecting which he was waging a petty warfare in the belief that he was standing up for his masters rights
Mr Bernard the former clergyman had been a quiet oldfashioned man very kindhearted but not at all active and things had gone on in a sleepy droning matterof-fact way which Markham being used to thought exactly what ought to be Now Mr Ashford was an energetic person desirous to do his utmost for the parish and whatever he did was an offence to Markham from the daily service to the objecting to the men going out fishing on Sunday He opposed every innovation with all his might and Captain Morvilles interference which had borne Markham down with Mr Edmonstones authority had only made him more determined not to bate an inch He growled every time Guy was inclined to believe Mr Ashford in the right and brought out some fresh complaint The grand controversy was at present about the school There was a dames school in the cove or fishing part of the parish maintained at the expense of the estate in a small cottage far from the church and Mr and Mrs Ashford had fixed their eyes on a house in the village and so near the church as to be very convenient for a Sunday School It only wanted to be floored and to have a partition taken down but to this Markham would not consent treating it as a monstrous proposal to take away the school from old Jenny Robinson
I suppose Mr Ashford meant to pension her off said Guy
He did say something about it but who is to do it I should like to know
We are I suppose
Pay two schoolmistresses mistresses at once One for doing nothing A pretty tolerable proposal for Mr Ashford to be making
I dont see why Of course it is my business
Besides I dont see that she is not as fit to keep school as ever she was
That may well be said Guy smiling We never used to be noted for our learning
Dont you be for bringing new lights into the parish Sir Guy or we shall never have any more peace
I shall see about old Jenny answered Guy As to the house that must be done directly Her cottage is not fit to keep school in
Grunt grunt but though a very unbending viceroy a must from the reigning baronet had a potent effect on Markham whether it was for good or evil He might grumble but he never disobeyed and the boy he was used to scold and order had found that Morville intonation of the must which took away all idea of resistance He still however remonstrated
As you please Sir Guy but we shall have the deer frightened and the plantations cut to pieces if the boys from the Cove are to be crossing the park
Ill be answerable for all the damage If they are once properly spoken to they will be on honour to behave well I have seen a little of what a village school ought to be at Easthill and I should like to see Redclyffe like it
Grunt again and Guy found that to make Markham amiable he must inquire after all his nephews and nieces
All the evening he had much to occupy him and the dreaded sense of solitude and bereavement did not come on till he had parted with Markham and stood alone before the fire in the large gloomy room where the light of the lamp seemed absorbed in the darkness of the distant corners and where he had scarcely been since the moment when he found his grandfather senseless in that very chair How different had that room once been in his eyes when his happy spirits defied every association of gloom and the bookshelves the carved chairs the heavy darkgreen curtains and deep windows were connected with merry freaks earnest researches delightful achievements or discoveries How long ago that time seemed and how changed was he
There was a certain tendency to melancholy in Guys mind High spirits prosperity and selfdiscipline had kept it from developing itself until the beginning of his troubles but since that time it had been gradually gaining ground and this was a time of great suffering as he stood alone in his forefathers house and felt himself in his early youth a doomed man destined to bear the penalty of their crimes in the ruin of his dearest hopes as if his heirloom of misery had but waited to seize on him till the very moment when it would give him the most to endure
But bear it I must and will said he lifting his head from the carved chimneypiece where he had been resting it I have been in will a murderer myself and what right have I to repine like the Israelites with their selfjustifying proverb No let me be thankful that I was not given up even then but have been able to repent and do a little better next time It will be a blessing as yet ungranted to any of us if indeed I should bear to the full the doom of sorrow so that it may be vouchsafed me only to avoid actual guilt Yes Amy your words are still with me—Sintram conquered his doom—and it was by following death Welcome then whatever may be in store for me were it even a long cheerless life without you Amy There is another world
With the energy of freshened resolution he lighted his candle and walked with echoing steps up the black oak staircase along the broad gallery up another flight down another passage to his own room He had expressly written his own room and confirmed it on his arrival or Mrs Drew would have lodged him as she thought more suitably for the master of the house Nothing had been done to alter its old familiar aspect except lighting a fire which he had never seen there before There were all his boyish treasures his bows and arrows his collection of birds wings his wonderful weapons and contrivances from his fireballoon down to the wrensegg all just as he left them their good condition attesting the care that Mrs Drew had taken for his sake
He renewed his acquaintance with them with a sort of regretful affection and superiority but there was a refreshment in these old memories which aided the new feeling of life imparted to him by his resolution to bear Nor had he only to bear he had also to do and before the late hour at which he fell asleep he had made up his mind what was the first step to be taken about Coombe Priory and had remembered with rejoicing that whereas he had regretted leaving the chapel at college which had so comforted and helped him there was now daily service at Redclyffe Church The last thing in his mind before reflection was lost in sleep was this stanza—
Gales from Heaven if so He will
Sweeter melodies may wake
On the lowly mountain rill
Than the meeting waters make
Who hath the Father and the Son
May be left but not alone
CHAPTER 22
And when the solemn deep churchbell
Entreats the soul to pray
The midnight phantoms feel the spell
The shadows sweep away
Down the broad Vale of Tears afar
The spectral camp is fled
Faith shineth as a morning star
Our ghastly fears are dead
—LONGFELLOW
Mr Ashford was a connection of Lady Thorndales and it was about a year since the living of Redclyffe had been presented to him Mr and Mrs Ashford were of course anxious to learn all they could about their young squire on whom the welfare of the parish depended even more than in most cases as the whole was his property Their expectations were not raised by Mr Markhams strenuous opposition to all their projects and his constant appeals to the name of Sir Guy but on the other hand they were pleased by the strong feeling of affection that all the villagers manifested for their landlord
The inhabitants of Redclyffe were a primitive race almost all related to each other rough and ignorant and with a very strong feudal feeling for Sir Guy who was king state supreme authority in their eyes and Mrs Ashford further found that Master Morville as the old women called him in his individual character was regarded by them with great personal affection
On the occasion when Captain Morville came to Redclyffe and left James Thorndale to spend a couple of hours at the parsonage they interrogated the latter anxiously on his acquaintance with Sir Guy He had not the least idea of creating prejudice indeed he liked him as a companion but he saw everything through the medium of his friend and spoke something to this effect He was very agreeable they would like his manners he was tolerably clever but not to be named in the same day with his cousin for abilities far less in appearance Very pleasant generally liked decidedly a taking man but there was some cloud over him just now—debts probably Morville had been obliged to go to Oxford about it but Mr Thorndale did not profess to understand it as of course Morville said as little of it as he could Thereupon all began to admire the aforesaid Morville already known by report and whose fine countenance and sensible conversation confirmed all that had been said of him
And as after his interference Mr Markhams opposition became surly as well as sturdy and Sir Guys name was sure to stand arrayed against them whichever way they turned the younger part of the family learnt to regard him somewhat in the light of an enemy and their elders awaited his majority with more of fear than of hope
Mamma cried Edward Ashford rushing in so as to bring the first news to his mother who had not been to the early service I do believe Sir Guy is come
Sir Guy was at church shouted Robert almost at the same moment
Mr Ashford confirmed the intelligence
I saw him speaking after church to some of the old men so afterwards I went to ask old John Barton and found him with tears in his eyes positively trembling with delight for he said he never thought to have heard his cheery voice again and that he was coming down by and by to see the last letter from Ben at sea
That is very nice Shall you call
Yes Even if he is only here for a day or two it will be better to have made the acquaintance
Mr Ashford went to the Park at two in the afternoon and did not return till near four
Well said he it is as James Thorndale says there is something very prepossessing about him
Have you been there all this time
Yes He was not at home so I left my card and was coming away when I met him at the turn leading to the Cove He need not have seen me unless he had liked but he came up in a goodnatured cordial way and thanked me for coming to call
Is he like his cousin
Not in the least not nearly so tall or so handsome but with a very pleasant face and seeming made up of activity very slight as if he was all bone and sinew He said he was going to see the Christmas ox at the farm and asked me to come with him Presently we came to a high gate locked up He was over it in an instant begged me to wait while he ran on to the farm for the key and was back in a second with it
Did he enter on any of the disputed subjects
He began himself about the school saying the house should be altered directly and talked over the whole matter very satisfactorily undertook himself to speak to Jenny Robinson and was very glad to hear you meant her still to keep the infants at the Cove so I hope that matter is in a right train
If Mr Markham will but let him
O he is king or more here We met Markham at the farm and the first thing after looking at the cattle Sir Guy found some planks lying about and said they were the very thing for flooring the school Markham mentioned some barn they were intended for but Sir Guy said the school must be attended to at once and went with us to look at it That was what kept me so long measuring and calculating and I hope it may be begun in a week
This is delightful What more could we wish
I dont think he will give trouble in parish matters and in personal intercourse he will be sure to be most agreeable I wish I knew there was nothing amiss It seems strange for him to come here for the vacation instead of going to his guardians as usual and altogether he had an air of sadness and depression not like a youth especially such an active one I am afraid something is wrong those engaging people are often unstable One thing I forgot to tell you We were walking through that belt of trees on the east side of the hill when he suddenly called out to ask how came the old ashtree to be marked Markham answered in his gruff way it was not his doing but the Captains He turned crimson and began some angry exclamation but as Markham was going on to tell something else about it he stopped him short saying Never mind I dare say its all right I dont want to hear any more And I dont think he spoke much again till we got into the village I am afraid there is some misunderstanding between the cousins
Or more likely Mr Markham is teaching him some jealousy of his heir We could not expect two Captain Morvilles in one family and I am glad it is no worse
All that the Ashfords further saw of their young baronet made an impression in his favour every difficulty raised by the steward disappeared their plans were forwarded and they heard of little but his goodnature to the poor people but still they did not know how far to trust these appearances and did not yet venture to form an opinion on him or enter into intimacy
So the singers will not come to us on Christmas Eve because they say they must go to the Park said Edward rather savagely
I was thinking said Mrs Ashford how forlorn it will be for that poor youth to spend his Christmasday alone in that great house Dont you think we might ask him to dinner
Before Mr Ashford could answer the boys made such an uproar at the proposal of bringing a stranger to spoil their Christmas that their parents gave up the idea
It was that Christmasday that Guy especially dreaded as recalling so many contrasts both with those passed here and at Hollywell Since his return he had been exerting himself to attend to what he felt to be his duty going about among his people arranging for their good or pleasure and spending a good deal of time over his studies He had written to Mr Ross to ask his advice about Coombe Prior and had set Markham much against his will to remonstrate with Farmer Todd about the repairs but though there was a sort of satisfaction in doing these things—though the attachment of his dependants soothed him and brought a new sense of the relation between himself and them—though views of usefulness were on each side opening before him—yet there was a dreariness about everything he was weary even while he undertook and planned energetically each new project reminding him that there was no Amy to plan with him He could not sufficiently care for them
Still more dreary was his return to his old haunts and to the scenery which he loved so devotedly—the blue sea and purple hills which had been like comrades and playfellows before he had known what it was to have living companions They used to be everything to him and he had scarcely a wish beyond afterwards his dreams had been of longing affection for them and latterly the idea of seeing Amy love them and admire them had been connected with every vision of them and now the sight of the reality did but recall the sense that their charm had departed they could no longer suffice to him as of old and their presence brought back to him with fresh pangs of disappointment the thought of lost happiness and ruined hopes as if Amy alone could restore their value
The depression of his spirits inclined him to dwell at present more on the melancholy history of his parents than on anything else He had hitherto only heard the brief narration of his grandfather when he could ask no questions but he now obtained full particulars from Markham who when he found him bent on hearing all related everything perhaps intending it as a warning against the passions which when once called into force he dreaded to find equally ungovernable in his present master
Mr Morville had been his great pride and glory and in fact had been so left to his care as to have been regarded like a son of his own He had loved him if possible better than Guy because he had been more his own he had chosen his school and given him all the reproofs which had ever been bestowed on him with his good in view and how he had grieved for him was never known to man It was the first time he had ever talked it over and he described with strong deep feeling the noble face and bearing of the darkeyed gallantlooking stripling his generosity and high spirit tainted and ruined by his wild temper and impatience of restraint There seemed to have been a great sweetness of disposition excellent impulses and so strong a love of his father in spite of early neglect and present resentment as showed what he might have been with only tolerable training which gave Guys idea of him more individuality than it had ever had before and made him better understand what his unhappy grandfathers remorse had been Guy doubted for a moment whether it had not been selfish to make Markham narrate the history of the time when he had suffered so much and Markham when he had been led into telling it and saw the deepening sadness on his young masters countenance wished it had not been told and ended by saying it was of no use to stir up what was better forgotten
He would have regretted the telling it still more if he had known how Guy acted it all over in his solitude picturing his father standing an outcast at the door of his own home yielding his pride and resentment for the sake of his wife ready to do anything yearning for reconciliation longing to tread once more the friendly familiar hall and meeting only the angry repulse and cruel taunt He imagined the headlong passion the despair the dashing on his horse in whirlwindlike swiftness then the blow—the fall—the awful stillness of the form carried back to his fathers house and laid on that table a dead man Fierce wrath—then another world Guy worked himself up in imagining the horror of the scene till it was almost as if he had been an actor in it
Yet he had never cared so much for the thought of his father as for his mother His yearning for her which he had felt in early days at Hollywell had returned in double force as he now fancied that she would have been here to comfort him and to share his grief to be a Mrs Edmonstone whose love no fault and no offence could ever cancel
He rode to Moorworth and made Mrs Lavers tell him all she remembered She was nothing loath and related how she had been surprised by Mr Morville arriving with his fair shrinking young wife and how she had rejoiced in his coming home again She described Mrs Morville with beautiful blue eyes and flaxen hair looking pale and delicate and with clinging caressing ways like a little child afraid to be left
Poor thing said Mrs Lavers wiping her eyes when he was going she clung about him and cried and was so timid about being left that at last he called me and begged me to stay with her and take care of her It was very pretty to see how gentle and soft he was to her sharp and hasty as he was with most and she would not let him go coaxing him not to stay away long till at last he put her on the sofa saying There there Marianne that will do Only be a good child and Ill come for you I never forget those words for they were the last I ever heard him speak
Well
Poor dear she cried heartily at first but after a time she cheered up and quite made friends with me I remember she told me which were Mr Morvilles favourite songs and sang little scraps of them
Can you remember what they were eagerly exclaimed Guy
Law no air I never had no head for music And she laughed about her journey to Scotland and got into spirits only she could not bear I should go out of the room and after a time she grew very anxious for him to come back I made her some tea and tried to get her to bed but she would not go though she seemed very tired for she said Mr Morville would come to take her to Redclyffe and she wanted to hear all about the great house listening for him all the time and I trying to quiet her and telling her the longer he stayed the better chance there was Then came a call for me and downstairs I found everything in confusion the news had come—I never knew how I had not had time to hear it rightly myself when there was a terrible cry from upstairs Poor thing whether she thought he was come or whether her mind misgave her she had come after me to the head of the stairs and heard what they were saying I dont believe she ever rightly knew what had happened for before I could get to her she had fainted and she was very ill from that moment
And it was the next day she died said Guy looking up after a long silence Did she—could she take any notice of me
No sir she lived but half an hour or hardly that after you were born I told her it was a son but she was not able to hear or mind me and sank away fainting like I fancied I heard her say something like Mr Morville but I dont know and her breath was very soon gone Poor dear added Mrs Lavers wiping away her tears I grieved for her as if she had been my own child but then I thought of her waking up to hear he was dead I little thought then Sir Guy that I should ever see you stand there—strong and well grown I almost thought you were dead already when I sent for Mr Harrison to baptize you
Was it you that did so said Guy his face mournful before lighting up in a sudden beam of gratitude Then I have to thank you for more than all the world besides
Law sir said Mrs Lavers smiling and looking pleased though as if but half entering into his meaning Yes it was in that very china bowl I have kept it choice ever since and never let it be used for anything I thought it was making very bold but the doctor and all thought you could not live and Mr Harrison might judge I was very glad just before he came that Mr Markham came from Redclyffe He had not been able to leave poor Sir Guy before
Guy soon after set out on his homeward ride His yearning to hear of his mother had been satisfied but though he could still love the fair sweet vision summoned up by her name he was less disposed to feel that it had been hard upon him that she died It was not Amy In spite of his tender compassion and affection he knew that he had not lost a Verena in her None could occupy that place save Amy and his mind from custom reverted to Amy as still his own thrilled like a freshlytouched wound and tried to realize the solace that even yet she might be praying for him
It was dreariness and despondency by day and he struggled with it by energy and occupation but it was something even worse in the evening in the dark solitary library where the very size of the room gave an additional sense of loneliness and in the silence he could hear through the closed shutters the distant plash and surge of the tide—a sound of which in former years he had never been sensible There evening after evening he sat—his attention roaming from his employment to feed on his sad reflections
One evening he went to the large dark diningroom unlocked the door which echoed far through the house and found his way through the packedup furniture to a picture against the wall to which he held up his light It was a portrait by Lely a halflength of a young man one hand on his sword the other holding his plumed hat His dark chestnut hair fell on each side of a bright youthful face full of life and health and with eyes which even in painting showed what their vividness must have been The countenance was full of spirit and joy but the mouth was more hard and stern than suited the rest and there was something in the strong determined grasp of the sword which made it seem as if the hand might be a characteristic portrait In the corner of the picture was the name—Hugo Morville AEt 2O 1671
Guy stood holding up his light and looking fixedly at it for a considerable time Strange thoughts passed through his mind as the pictured eyes seemed to gaze piercingly down into his own When he turned away he muttered aloud—
He too would have said—Is thy servant a dog that he should do this
It seemed to him as if he had once been in a happier better world with the future dawning brightly on him but as if that once yielding to the passions inherited from that wretched man had brought on him the doom of misery He had opened the door to the powers of evil and must bear the penalty
These feelings might partly arise from its having been only now that had all been well he could have been with Amabel so that it seemed as if he had never hitherto appreciated the loss He had at first comforted himself by thinking it was better to be without her than to cause her distress but now he found how hard it was to miss her—his bright angel Darkness was closing on him a tedious aimless life spread out before him a despair of doing good haunted him and with it a sense of something like the presence of an evil spirit triumphing in his having once put himself within its grasp
It was well for Guy that he was naturally active and had acquired power over his own mind He would not allow himself to brood over these thoughts by day and in the evening he busied himself as much as possible with his studies or in going over with Markham matters that would be useful to him to know when he came to the management of his property Yet still these thoughts would thicken on him in spite of himself every evening when he sat alone in the library
The late hours of Christmas Eve was the time when he had most to suffer The day had been gloomy and snowy and he had spent it almost entirely in solitude with no companion or diversion to restore the tone of his mind when he had tried it with hard study He tried to read but it would not do and he was reduced to sit looking at the fire recalling this time last year when he had been cutting holly helping the sisters to deck the house and in the evening enjoying a merry Christmas party full of blitheness and glee where there were of course special recollections of Amabel
As usual he dwelt on the contrast mused on the estrangement of Mrs Edmonstone and tormented himself about Charless silence till he fell into the more melancholy train of thought of the destiny of his race
Far better for him to bear all alone than to bring on Amy grief and horror such as had fallen on his own mother but it was much to bear that loneliness and desolation for a lifetime The brow was contracted and the lip drawn into a resolute expression of keeping down suffering like that of a man enduring acute bodily pain as Guy was not yielding he was telling himself—telling the tempter who would have made him give up the struggle—that it was only for a life and that it was shame and ingratitude to be fainthearted on the very night when he ought to be rejoicing that One had come to ruin the power of the foe and set him free But where was his rejoicing Was he cheered—was he comforted Was not the lone blank despondency that had settled on him more heavily than ever a token that he was shut out from all that was good—nay that in former years there had been no true joy in him only enjoyment of temporal pleasure Had his best days of happiness been then nothing but hollowness and selfdeception
At that moment the sound of a Christmas carol came faintly on his ear It was one of those tunes which when the village choir were the only musicians he knew he had thought unrivalled and now even to his tutored delicate ear softened as it was by distance and endeared by association it was full of refreshing soothing harmony He undrew the curtain opened the shutter and looked into the court where he saw some figures standing As soon as the light shone from the window the carol was resumed and the familiar tones were louder and harsher but he loved them with all their rudeness and dissonance and throwing up the window called the singers by name asking why they stood out in the snow instead of coming into the hall as usual
The oldest of the set came to the window to answer—so old a man that his voice was cracked and his performance did more harm than good in the psalms at church
You see Sir Guy said he there was some of us thought you might not like to have us coming and singing like old times cause tis not all as it used to be here with you Yet we didnt like not to come at all when you had been away so long so we settled just to begin and see whether you took any notice
Thank you It was a very kind thought James said Guy touched by the rough delicacy of feeling manifested by these poor men I had rather hear the carols than anything Come to the front door Ill let you in
Thank you sir with a most grateful touch of the hat and Guy hastened to set things in order preferring the carols to everything at that moment even though disabused of his pristine admiration for James Robinsons fiddle and for Harry Rays grand shake A long space was spent in listening and a still longer in the endeavour to show what Mr Ashford meant by suggesting some improvements which they were regarding with dislike and suspicion till they found Sir Guy was of the same mind In fact when he had sung a verse or two to illustrate his meaning the opinion of the choir was that with equal advantages Sir Guy might sing quite as well as Harry Ray
It was the first time he had heard his own voice except at church since the earlier days of St Mildreds but as he went up the long stairs and galleries to bed he found himself still singing It was
Who lives forlorn
On Gods own word doth rest
His path is bright
With heavenly light
His lot among the blest
He wondered and remembered finding music for it with Amys help He sighed heavily but the anguish of feeling the sense of being in the power of evil had insensibly left him and though sad and oppressed the unchangeable joy and hope of Christmas were shedding a beam on him
They were not gone when he awoke and rose to a solitary breakfast without one Christmas greeting The light of the other life was beginning to shine out and make him see how to do and to bear with that hope before him The hope was becoming less vague the resolution though not more firm yet less desponding that he would go on to grapple with temptation and work steadfastly and with that hope before him he now felt that even a lifetime without Amy would be endurable
The power of rejoicing came more fully at church and the service entered into his soul as it never had done before It had never been such happiness though repentance and mournful feelings were ever present with him nor was his Verena absent from his mind He walked about between the services saw the poor people dining in their hollydecked houses exchanging Christmas wishes with them and gave his old beautiful bright smile as he received demonstrations of their attachment or beheld their enjoyment He went home in the dark allowed Mrs Drew to have her own way and serve him and Bustle with a dinner sufficient for a dozen people and was shut up for the solitary Christmas evening which he had so much dreaded and which would have been esteemed a misfortune even by those who had no sad thoughts to occupy them
Yet when the clock struck eleven he was surprised and owned that it had been more than not being unhappy The dark fiends of remorse and despair had not once assaulted him yet it had not been by force of employment that they had been averted He had read and written a little but very little and the time had chiefly been spent in a sort of daydream though not of a return to Hollywell nor of what Redclyffe might be with Amy It had been of a darkened and lonely course yet in another sense neither dark nor lonely of a cheerless home and round of duties with a true home beyond and still it had been a happy refreshing dream and he began the next morning with the fresh brightened spirit of a man who felt that such an evening was sent him to reinvigorate his energies and fit him for the immediate duties that lay before him
On the breakfasttable was what he had not seen for a long time—a letter directed to him It was from Mr Ross in answer to his question about Coombe Prior entering readily into the subject and advising him to write to the Bishop altogether with a tone of friendly interest which especially as coming from one so near Hollywell was a great pleasure a real Christmas treat There was the wonted wish of the season—a happy Christmas—which he took gratefully and lastly there was a mention that Charles Edmonstone was better the suffering over though he was not yet allowed to move
It was a new light that Charless silence had been occasioned by illness and his immediate resolution was to write at once to Mr Ross to beg for further particulars In the meantime the perception that there had been no estrangement was such a ray as can hardly be imagined without knowing the despondency it had enlivened The truth was perhaps that the tone of mind was recovering and after having fixed himself in his resolution to endure he was able to receive comfort and refreshment from without as well as from within
He set to work to write at once to the Bishop as Mr Ross advised He said he could not bear to lose time and therefore wrote at once He should be of age on the 28th of March and he hoped then to be able to arrange for a stipend for a curate if the Bishop approved and would kindly enter into communication on the appointment with Mr Halroyd the incumbent After considering his letter a little while and wishing he was sufficiently intimate with Mr Ashford to ask him if it would do he wrote another to Mr Ross to inquire after Charles then he worked for an hour at mathematics till a message came from the gamekeeper to ask whether he would go out shooting whereat Bustle evidently understanding jumped about and wagged his tail so imploringly that Guy could not resist so he threw his books upon the top of the great pile on the sofa and glad that at least he could gratify dog and man he sent word that he should be ready in five minutes
He could not help enjoying the ecstasy of all the dogs and indeed he was surprised to find himself fully alive to the delight of forcing his way through a furzebrake hearing the ice in the peaty bogs crackle beneath his feet getting a good shot bringing down his bird finding snipe and diving into the depths of the long winding valleys and dingles with the iciclehung banks of their streamlets He came home through the village at about halfpast three oclock sending the keeper to leave some of his game at the parsonage while he went himself to see how the work was getting on at the school Mr and Mrs Ashford and the boys were come on the same errand in spite of the cloud of dust rising from the newlydemolished lathandplaster partition The boys looked with longing eyes at the gun in his hand and the halffrozen compound of black and red mud on his gaiters but they were shy and their enmity added to their shyness so that even when he shook hands with them and spoke goodnaturedly they did not get beyond a monosyllable
Mr and Mrs Ashford feeling some compunction for having left him to his solitude so long asked him to dinner for one of the ensuing days with some idea of getting some one to meet him and named six oclock
Wont that put you out Dont you always dine early said he If you would let me I should like to join you at your teatime
If you will endure a host of children said Mr Ashford I should like it of all things said Guy I want to make acquaintance very much and he put his hand on Roberts shoulder Besides I want to talk to you about the singing and how we are to get rid of that fiddle without breaking James Robinsons heart
The appointment was made and Guy went home to his hasty dinner his Greek and a little refreshing return afterwards to the books which had been the delight of younger days There was no renewal of the burthen of despair that had so long haunted his evenings Employments thickened on his hands as the days passed on There was further correspondence about Coombe Prior and the curate and consultations with Markham about farmer Todd who was as obstinate and troublesome as possible Guy made Markham come to Coombe Prior with him examine and calculate about the cottages and fairly take up the subject though without much apparent chance of coming to any satisfactory result A letter came from Mr Ross telling him even more than he had ventured to hope for it brought a message from Charles himself Charles had been delighted to hear of him and had begged that he might be told how very sorry he had been not to write and how incapable he had been and still was but that he hoped Guy would write to him and believe him in the same mind Mr Ross added an account of Charless illness saying the suffering had been more severe than usual and had totally disabled him for many weeks that they had since called in a London surgeon who had given him hope that he might be better now than ever before but had prescribed absolute rest for at least six weeks longer so that Charles was now flat on his back all day beginning to be able to be amused and very cheerful and patient
The pleasure of entering into communication with Hollywell again and knowing that Charles at least would be glad to hear from him was so exquisite that he was almost surprised considering that in essentials he was where he was before and even Charles could not be Amy
CHAPTER 23
They hadna sailed a league a league
A league but barely three
When the lift grew dark and the wind grew loud
And gurly grew the sea
—SIR PATRICK SPENS—Old Ballad
Guys evening with the Ashfords threw down many of the barriers in the way of intimacy He soon made friends with the children beginning with the two years old baby and ending with gaining even the shy and sturdy Robin who could not hold out any longer when it appeared that Sir Guy could tell him the best place for finding seaurchins the present objects of his affections
But we should have to go through the park said Edward disconsolately when Guy had described the locality
Well why not
We must not go into the park cried the children in chorus
Not go into the park exclaimed Guy looking at Mrs Ashford in amazement then as it flashed on him that it was his part to give leave he added—I did not know I was such a dog in the manger I thought all the parish walked naturally in the park I dont know what else it is good for If Markham will lock it up I must tell him to give you a key
The boys were to come the next day—to be shown the way to the bay of urchins and thenceforth they became his constant followers to such a degree that their parents feared they were very troublesome but he assured them to the contrary and no mother in the world could have found it in her heart to keep them away from so much happiness There was continually a rushing home with a joyous outcry—Mamma Sir Guy gave me a ride on his horse Mamma Sir Guy helped us to the top of that great rock Oh papa Sir Guy says we may come out shooting with him tomorrow if you will let us Mamma papa look Do you see I shot this rabbit my own self with Sir Guys gun Papa papa Sir Guy showed us his boat and he says he will take us out to the Shag Rock if you will give us leave
This was beyond what papa still further beyond what mamma could like since the sea was often very rough in parts near the Shag there were a good many sunken rocks and boys water and rocks did not appear by any means a safe conjunction so Mrs Ashford put the matter off for the present by the unseasonableness of the weather and Mr Ashford asked one or two of the fishermen how far they thought landing on the Shag a prudent attempt
They did not profess to have often tried they always avoided those rocks but it could hardly be very dangerous they said for when Sir Guy was a boy he used to be about there for ever at first with an old boatman and afterwards alone in his little boat They had often wondered he was trusted there but if any one knew the rocks he did
Still Mrs Ashford could not make up her mind to like the idea and the boys came to Sir Guy in a state of great discomposure
Never mind he said perhaps we shall manage it in the summer We will get your father to go out with us himself and in the meantime who likes to come with me after the rabbits in Cliffstone Copse Farmer Holt will thank Robin for killing a dozen or so for he makes grievous complaints of them
Guy conducted the boys out of sight of the sea and to console them gave them so much more use of the gun than usual that it might be considered as a wonder that he escaped being shot Yet it did not prevent a few sighs being spent on the boating
Cant you forget it said Guy smiling You have no loss after all for we are likely to have no boating weather this long time Hark dont you hear the groundswell
Whats that said the boys standing still to listen to the distant surge like a continuous low moan or roar far far away though there was no wind and the sea was calm
It is the sound that comes before stormy weather said Guy It is as if the sea was gathering up its forces for the tempest
But what—how Tell me what it really is said Robin
I suppose it is the wind on the sea before it has reached us said Guy How solemn it is
Too solemn for the boys who began all manner of antics and noises by way of silencing the impression of awfulness Guy laughed and joined in their fun but as soon as they were gone home he stood in silence for a long time listening to the sound and recalling the mysterious dreams and fancies with which it was connected in his boyhood and which he had never wished thus to drive away
The storm he had predicted came on and by the evening of the following day sea and wind were thundering in their might against the foot of the crags Guy looked from the window the last thing at night and saw the stars twinkling overhead with that extreme brilliancy which is often seen in the intervals of fitful storms and which suggested thoughts that sent him to sleep in a vague soothing dream
He was wakened by one tremendous continued roar of sea wind and thunder combined Such was the darkness that he could not see the form of the window till a sheet of pale blue lightning brought it fully out for the moment He sat up and listened to the glorious voice that followed it thought what an awful night at sea and remembered when he used to fancy it would be the height of felicity to have a shipwreck at Redclyffe and shocked Mrs Bernard by inhuman wishes that a ship would only come and be wrecked How often had he watched through sounds like these for a minute gun Nay he had once actually called up poor Arnaud in the middle of the night for an imaginary signal Redclyffe Bay was a very dangerous one a fine place for a wreck with its precipitous crags its single safe landingplace and the great Shag Stone on the eastern side with a whole progeny of nearly sunken rocks dreaded in rough weather by the fishermen themselves but it was out of the ordinary track of vessels and there were only a few traditions of terrible wrecks long before his time
It seemed as if he had worked up his fancy again for the sound of a gun was for a moment in his ear It was lost in the rush of hail against the window and the moaning of the wind round the old house but presently it returned too surely to be imaginary He sprang to the window and the broad flickering glare of lightning revealed the black cliff and pale sealine then all was dark and still while the storm was holding its breath for the thunderburst which in a few more seconds rolled overhead shaking door and window throughout the house As the awful sound died away in a moments lull came the gun again He threw up the window and as the blast of wind and rain swept howling into the room it brought another report
To close the window light his candle throw on his clothes and hasten downstairs was the work of a very few seconds Luckily the key of the boathouse was lying on the table in the hall where he had left it after showing the boat to the Ashford boys he seized it caught up the pocket telescope put on a rough coat and proceeded to undo the endless fastenings of the halldoor a very patiencetrying occupation and when completed the gusts that were eddying round the house ready to force their way in everywhere took advantage of the first opening to blow out his candle
However they had in one way done good service for the shower had been as brief as it was violent and the inky cloud was drifting away furiously towards the east leaving the moon visible near her setting and allowing her white cold light to shine forth contrasting with the distant sheets of pale lightning growing fainter and fainter
Guy ran across the court round to the west side of the house and struggled up the slope in the face of the wind which almost swept him down again and when at length he had gained the summit came rushing against him with such force that he could hardly stand He did however keep his ground and gazed out over the sea The swell was fearful marked by the silver light on one side where it caught the moonbeams and the black shade on the other ever alternating so that the eye could not fix on them for a moment the spray leapt high in its whiteness and the Shag stood up hard bold and black The waves thundered bursting on the cliff and high as he stood the spray dashed almost blinding in his face while the wind howled round him as if gathering its might for the very purpose of wrenching him from the cliff but he stood firm and looked out again to discern clearly what he thought he had seen It was the mast of a vessel seen plainly against the light silvery distance of sea on the reef west of the Shag It was in a slanting direction and did not move he could not doubt that the ship had struck on the dangerous rocks at the entrance of the bay and as his eyes became more accustomed to the unusual light and made out what objects were or were not familiar he could perceive the ship herself He looked with the glass but could see no one on board nor were any boats in sight but observing some of the lesser rocks he beheld some moving figures on them Help—instant help—was his thought and he looked towards the Cove Lights were in the cottage windows and a few sounds came up to him as if the fishing population were astir
He hastened to the side of the cliff which was partly clothed with brushwood There was a descent—it could hardly be called a path—which no one ventured to attempt but himself and a few of the boldest birdsnesting boys of the village but he could lose no time and scrambling leaping swinging himself by the branches he reached the foot of the cliff in safety and in five minutes more was on the little quay at the end of the steep street of the Cove
The quay was crowded with the fisherpeople and there was a strange confusion of voices some saying all was lost some that the crew had got to the rock others that some one ought to put off and help them others that a boat would never live in such a sea and an old telescope was in great requisition
Ben Robinson a tall hardy young man of fiveandtwenty wild reckless highspirited and full of mischief and adventure was standing on a pile at the extreme verge above the foaming water daring the others to go with him to the rescue and though Jonas Ledbury a feeble old man was declaring in a piteous tone it was a sin and a shame to let so many poor creatures be lost in sight without one man stirring to help them yet all stood irresolute watching the white breakers dashing on the Shag and the high waves that swelled and rolled between
Do you know where the crew are exclaimed Guy shouting as loud as he could for the noise of the winds and waves was tremendous
There sir on the flat black stone said the fortunate possessor of the telescope Some ten or eleven of them I fancy all huddled together
Ay ay said old Ledbury Poor creatures there they be and what is to be done I cant say I never saw a boat in such a sea since the night poor Jack my brother was lost and Will Ray with him
I see them said Guy who had in the meantime looked through his glass How soon is high water
It was an important question for the rocks round the Shag were covered before full tide even when the water was still There was a looking up at the moon and then Guy and the fishermen simultaneously exclaimed that it would be in three hours which gave scarcely an hour to spare
Without another word Guy sprang from the quay to the boathouse unlocked it and by example showed that the largest boat was to be brought out The men helped him vigorously and it stood on the narrow pebbly beach the only safe landingplace in the whole bay he threw into it a coil of rope and called out in his clear commanding voice—Five to go with me
Hanging back was at an end They were brave men who had wanted nothing but a leader and with Sir Guy at their head were ready for anything Not five but fiveandtwenty were at his command and even in the hurry of the moment a strong affectionate feeling filled his eyes with tears as he saw these poor fellows ready to trust their lives in his hands
Thank you—thank you he exclaimed Not all though you Ben Robinson Harry Ray Charles Ray Ben Ledbury Wat Green
They were all young men without families such as could best be spared and each as his name was called answered Here Sir Guy and came forward with a resolute satisfied air
It would be best to have a second boat said Guy Mr Brown to the owner of the telescope will you lend yours tis the strongest and lightest Thank you Martin had best steer it he knows the rocks and he went on to name the rest of the crew but at the last there was a moments pause as if he doubted
A tall athletic young fisherman took advantage of it to press forward
Please your honour Sir Guy may not I go
Better not Jem answered Guy Remember in a lower voice your mother has no one but you Here he called cheerfully Jack Horn you pull a good oar Now then are we ready
All ready—yes sir
The boat was launched not without great difficulty in the face of such a sea The men stoutly took their oars casting a look forward at the rocks then at the quay and on the face of their young steersman Little they guessed the intense emotion that swelled in his breast as he took the helm to save life or to lose it enjoying the enterprise yet with the thought that his lot might be early death glad it was right thus to venture earnest to save those who had freely trusted to him and rapidly though most earnestly recalling his own repentance All this was in his mind though nothing was on his face but cheerful resolution
Night though it was tidings of the wreck had reached the upper part of the village and Mr Ashford putting his head out of his window to learn the cause of the sounds in the street was informed by many voices that a ship was on the Shag reef and that all were lost To hasten to the Cove to learn the truth and see if any assistance could yet be afforded was his instant thought and he had not taken many steps before he was overtaken by a square sturdy figure wrapped in an immense greatcoat
So Mr Markham you are on your way to see about this wreck
Why ay said Markham roughly though not with the repellent manner usual with him towards Mr Ashford I must be there or that boy will be in the thickest of it Wherever is mischief there is he I only wonder he has not broken his neck long ago
By mischief you mean danger
Yes I hope he has not heard of this wreck for if he has no power on earth would keep him back from it
Comparing the reports they had heard the clergyman and steward walked on Markhams anxiety actually making him friendly They reached the top of the steep street of the Cove but though there was a good view of the sea from thence they could distinguish nothing for another cloud was rising and had obscured the moon They were soon on the quay now still more crowded and heard the exclamations of those who were striving to keep their eyes on the boats
Theres one No Yes tis Thats Sir Guys
Sir Guy exclaimed Markham You dont mean he is gone Then I am too late What could you be thinking of you old fool Jonas to let that boy go Youll never see him again I can tell you Mercy Here comes another squall Theres an end of it then
Markham seemed to derive some relief from railing at the fishermen singly and collectively while Mr Ashford tried to learn the real facts and gather opinions as to the chance of safety The old fishermen held that there was frightful risk though the attempt was far from hopeless they said the young men were all good at their oars Sir Guy knew the rocks very well and the chief fear was that he might not know how to steer in such a sea but they had seen that though daring he was not rash They listened submissively to Mr Markham but communicated in an undertone to the vicar how vain it would have been to attempt to restrain Sir Guy
Why sir said old James Robinson he spoke just like the captain of a manofwar and for all Mr Markham says I dont believe hed have been able to gainsay him
Your son is gone with him
Ay sir and I would not say one word to stop him I know Sir Guy wont run him into risk for nothing and I hope please God if Ben comes back safe it may be the steadying of him
Twas he that volunteered to go before Sir Guy came they say
Yes sir said the old man with a pleased yet melancholy look Bens brave enough but theres the difference Hed have done it for the lark and to dare the rest but Sir Guy does it with thought and because it is right I wish it may be the steadying of Ben
The shower rushed over them again shorter and less violent than the former one but driving in most of the crowd and only leaving on the quay the vicar the steward and a few of the most anxious fishermen They could see nothing for the dark slanting line of rain swept over the waves joining together the sea and thick low cloud and the roaring of the sea and moaning of the wind were fearful No one spoke till at last the black edges of the Shag loomed clearer the moon began to glance through the skirts of the cloud and the heaving and tossing of the sea became more discernible
There—there shouted young Jem the widows son
The boats
One
Where—where—for heavens sake Thats nothing cried Markham
Yes—yes I see both said Jem The glass Wheres Mr Browns glass
Markham was trying to fix his own but neither hand nor eye were steady enough he muttered—Hang the glass and paced up and down in uncontrollable anxiety Mr Ashford turned with him trying to speak consolingly and entirely liking the old man Markham was not ungrateful but he was almost in despair
It is the same over again said he He is the age his father was though Mr Morville never was such as he—never—how should he He is the last of them—the best—he would have been—he was Would to heaven I were with him that if he is lost we might all go together
There sir called Jem who being forbidden to do anything but watch did so earnestly they be as far now as opposite West Cove Dont you see them in that light place
The moon had by this time gone down but the first great light of dawn was beginning to fall on the tall Shag and show its fissures and dark shades instead of leaving it one hard unbroken mass Now and then Jem thought he saw the boats but never so distinctly as to convince the watchers that they had not been swamped among the huge waves that tumbled and foamed in that dangerous tract
Mr Ashford had borrowed Markhams telescope and was looking towards the rock where the shipwrecked crew had taken refuge
There is some one out of the boat climbing on the rocks Can you make him out Jem
I see—I see said Mr Brown there are two of them They are climbing along the leeside of the long ridge of rocks
Ay ay said old Ledbury they cant get in a boat close to the flat rocks they must take out a line Bold fellows
Where are the boats asked Mr Ashford
I can tell that said Ledbury they must have got under the lee of the lesser Shag Theres a ring there that Sir Guy had put in to moor his boat to Theyll be made fast there and those two must be taking the rope along that ledge so as for the poor fellows on the rock to have a hold of as they creep along to where the boats are
Those broken rocks said Mr Ashford Can there be a footing and in such a sea
Can you give a guess who they be sir asked Robinson earnestly If youd only let Jem have a look maybe he could guess
Markhams glass was at his service
Hullo what a sea I see them now Thats Ben going last—I know his red cap And the first—why tis Sir Guy himself
Dont be such a fool Jem cried Markham angrily Sir Guy knows better Give me the glass
But when it was restored Markham went on spying in silence while Brown keeping fast possession of his own telescope communicated his observations
Ay I see them Where are they Hes climbing now Theres a breaker just there will wash them off as sure as theyre alive I dont see em Yes I do—theres Redcap Theres something stirring on the rock
So they watched till after an interval in which the boats disappeared behind the rocks they were seen advancing over the waters again—one—yes—both and loaded They came fast they were in sight of all growing larger each moment mounting on the crest of the huge rolling waves then plunged in the trough so long as to seem as if they were lost then rising—rising high as mountains Over the roaring waters came at length the sound of voices a cheer pitched in a different key from the thunder of wind and wave they almost fancied they knew the voice that led the shout Such a cheer as rose in answer from all the Redclyffe villagers densely crowded on quay and beach and every corner of standing ground
The sun was just up his beams gilded the crests of the leaping waves and the spray danced up white and gay round the tall rocks whose shadow was reflected in deep green broken by the evermoving swell The Shag and its attendant rocks and the broken vessel were bathed in the clear morning light the sky was of a beautiful blue with magnificent masses of dark cloud the edges where touched by the sunbeams of a pearly white and across the bay tracing behind them glittering streams of light came up the two boats with their freight of rescued lives Martins boat was the first to touch the landingplace
All saved he said all owing to him pointing back to Sir Guy
There was no time for questions the wan drenched sailors had to be helped on shore and the boat hauled up out of the way In the meantime Guy as he steered in past the quay smiled and nodded to Mr Ashford and Markham and renewed the call All safe Mr Ashford thought that he had never seen anything brighter than his face—the eyes radiant in the morning sun the damp hair hanging round it and life energy and promptitude in every feature and movement
The boat came in the sailors were assisted out partly by their rescuers partly by the spectators Guy stood up and with one foot on the seat supported on his knee and against his arm a little boy round whom his greatcoat was wrapped
Here Jem he shouted to his rejected volunteer who had been very active in bringing in the boat heres something for you to do This poor little fellow has got a broken arm Will you ask your mother to take him in Shes the best nurse in the parish And send up for Mr Gregson
Jem received the boy as tenderly as he was given and with one bound Guy was by the side of his two friends Mr Ashford shook hands with heartfelt gratulation Markham exclaimed—
There Sir Guy after the old fashion Never was man so mad in this world Ive done talking Youll never be content till you have got your death As if no one could do anything without you
Was it you who carried out the line on the rock said Mr Ashford
Ben Robinson and I I had often been there after sea anemones and weeds and I had a rope round me so dont be angry Markham
I have no more to say answered Markham almost surly I might as well talk to a seagull at once As if you had any right to throw away your life
I enjoyed it too much to have anything to say for myself said Guy besides we must see after these poor men There were two or three nearly drowned Is no one gone for Mr Gregson
Mr Gregson the doctor was already present and no one who had any authority could do anything but attend to the disposal of the shipwrecked crew Mr Ashford went one way Markham another Guy a third but between one cottage and another Mr Ashford learnt some particulars The crew had been found on a flat rock and the fishermen had at first thought all their perils in vain for it was impossible to bring the boats up on account of the rocks which ran out in a long reef Sir Guy who knew the place steered to the sheltered spot where he had been used to make fast his own little boat and undertook to make his way from thence to the rock where the crew had taken refuge carrying a rope to serve as a kind of handrail when fastened from one rock to the other Ben insisted on sharing his peril and they had crept along the slippery broken reefs lashed by the surge for such a distance that the fishermen shuddered as they spoke of the danger of being torn off by the force of the waves and dashed against the rocks Nothing else could have saved the crew They had hardly accomplished the passage through the rising tide even with the aid of the rope and the guidance of Sir Guy and Ben and before the boats had gone half a mile on their return the surge was tumbling furiously over the stones where they had been found
The sailors were safely disposed of in bed or by the fireside the fishers vying in services to them Mr Ashford went to the cottage of Charity Ledbury Jems mother to inquire for the boy with the broken arm As he entered the empty kitchen the opposite door of the stairs was opened and Guy appeared stepping softly and speaking low
Poor little fellow he said he is just going to sleep He bore it famously
The setting his arm
Yes He was quite sensible and very patient and that old Charity Ledbury is a capital old woman She and Jem are delighted to have him and will nurse him excellently How are all the others Has that poor man come to his senses
Yes I saw him safe in bed at old Robinsons The captain is at the Browns
I wonder what time of day it is
Past eight Ah there is the bell beginning I was thinking of going to tell Master Ray we are not too much excited to remember churchgoing this morning but I am glad he has found it out only ten minutes too late I must make haste Goodbye
May not I come too or am I too strange a figure said Guy looking at his dress thrown on in haste and saturated with seawater
May you said Mr Ashford smiling Is it wise with all your wet things
I am not given to colds answered Guy and they walked on quickly for some minutes after which he said in a low voice and hurried manner—would you make some mention of it in the Thanksgiving
Of course I will said Mr Ashford with much emotion The danger must have been great
It was said Guy as if the strong feeling would show itself. It was most merciful That little boat felt like a toy at the will of the winds and waves till one recollected who held the storm in His hand
He spoke very simply as if he could not help it with his eye fixed on the clear eastern sky and with a tone of grave awe and thankfulness which greatly struck Mr Ashford from the complete absence of self-consciousness or from any attempt either to magnify or depreciate his sense of the danger
You thought the storm a more dangerous time than your expedition on the rock
It was not The fishermen who were used to such things did not think much of it but I am glad to have been out on such a night if only for the magnificent sensation it gives to realize ones own powerlessness and His might As for the rock there was something to do to look to ones footing and cling on no time to think
It was a desperate thing
Not so bad as it looked One step at a time is all one wants you know and that there always was But what a fine fellow Ben Robinson is He behaved like a regular hero—it was the thorough contempt and love of danger one reads of There must be a great deal of good in him if one only knew how to get hold of it
Look there was Mr Ashfords answer as he turned his head at the church wicket and at a short distance behind Guy saw Ben himself walking up the path with his thankful happy father a sight that had not been seen for months nay for years
Ay he said such a night as this and such a good old man as the father could not fail to bring out all the good in a man
Yes thought Mr Ashford such a night under such a leader The sight of so much courage based on that foundation is what may best touch and save that man
After church Guy walked fast away Mr Ashford went home made a long breakfast having the whole story to tell and was on to the scene of action again where he found the master quite restored and was presently joined by Markham Of Sir Guy there was no news except that Jem Ledbury said he had looked in after church to know how the cabin boy was going on and the master understanding that he had been the leader in the rescue was very anxious to thank him and walked up to the house with Markham and Mr Ashford
Markham conducted them straight to the library the door of which was open He crossed the room smiled and made a sign to Mr Ashford who looked in some surprise and amusement It has been already said that the room was so spacious that the inhabited part looked like a little encampment by the fire though the round table was large and the green leather sofa and arm chair were cumbrous
However old Sir Guys armchair was never used by his grandson Markham might sit there and Bustle did sometimes but Guy always used one of the unpretending unluxurious chairs which were the staple of the room This however was vacant and on the table before it stood the remains of breakfast a loaf reduced to half its dimensions an empty plate and coffeecup The fire was burnt down to a single log and on the sofa on all the various books with which it was strewed lay Guy in anything but a comfortable position his head on a great dictionary fairly overcome with sleep his very thick black eyelashes resting on his fresh bright cheek and the relaxation of the grave expression of his features making him look even younger than he really was He was so sound asleep that it was not till some movement of Markhams that he awoke and started up exclaiming—
What a horrid shame I am very sorry
Sorry what for said Markham I am glad at any rate you have been wise enough to change your things and eat some breakfast
I meant to have done so much said Guy but seawind makes one so sleepy Then perceiving the captain he came forward hoping he was quite recovered
The captain stood mystified for he could not believe this slim youth could be the Sir Guy of whose name he had heard so much and after answering the inquiry he began—
If I could have the honour of seeing Sir Guy—
Well said Guy
I beg your pardon sir said the captain while they all laughed I did not guess you could be so young a gentleman I am sure sir tis what any man might be proud of having done and—I never saw anything like it he added with a fresh start and it will do you honour everywhere All our lives are owing to you sir
Guy did not cut him short though very glad when it was over He felt he should not in the captains place like to have his thanks shortened and besides if ever there was happiness or exultation it was in the glistening eyes of old Markham the first time he had ever been able to be justly proud of one of the family whom he loved with so much faithfulness and devotion
CHAPTER 24
Is there a word or jest or game
But time encrusteth round
With sad associate thoughts the same
—ELIZABETH BARRETT BROWNING
Among the persons who spent a forlorn autumn was Mr Ross though his troubles were not quite of the same description as those of his young parishioners He missed his daughter very much all his household affairs got out of order the schoolgirls were naughty and neither he nor Miss Edmonstone nor the mistress could discover the culprits their inquiries produced nothing but a wild confusion of mutual accusations where the truth was undistinguishable The cook never could find anything to make broth of Mr Ross could never lay his hands on the books he wanted for himself or anybody else and lastly none of his shirts ever had their buttons on
Mary meanwhile had to remain through a whole course of measles then to greet the arrival of a new nephew and to attend his christening but she had made a vow that she would be at home by Christmas and she kept it
Mr Ross had the satisfaction of fetching her home from the station the day before Christmas Eve and of seeing her opposite to him on her own side of the table in the evening putting on the buttons and considering it an especial favour and kindness for which to be for ever grateful that he had written all his Christmas sermons beforehand so as to have a whole evening clear before her He was never a great letterwriter and Mary had a great deal to hear for all that had come to her were the main facts with very few details
I have had very few letters even from Hollywell said she I suppose it is on account of Charless illness You think him really better
Yes much better I forgot to tell you you are wanted for their Christmas party tomorrow night
Oh he is well enough for them not to put it off Is he able to be out of bed
No he lies perfectly flat and looks very thin It has been a very severe illness I dont think I ever knew him suffer so much but at the same time I never knew him behave so well or show so much patience and consideration for other people I was the more surprised because at first he seemed to have relapsed into all the ways he thought he had shaken off he was so irritable and fretful that poor Mrs Edmonstone looked worn out but it seems to have been only the beginning of the illness it was very different after he was laid up
Has he had you to see him
Yes he asked for it which he never did before and Amabel reads to him every morning There is certainly much more that is satisfactory about those young Edmonstones than there once seemed reason to expect
And now tell me about Sir Guy What is the matter Why does he not come home this winter
I cannot tell you the rights of it Mary Mr Edmonstone is very much offended about something he is reported to have said and suspects him of having been in mischief at St Mildreds but I am not at all persuaded that it is not one of Mr Edmonstones affronts
Where is he
At Redclyffe I have a letter from him which I am going to answer tonight I shall tell the Edmonstones about it for I cannot believe that if he had been guilty of anything very wrong his mind would be occupied in this manner and he gave Mary the letter
Oh no exclaimed Mary as she read I am sure he cannot be in any mischief What an admirable person he is I am very sorry this cloud has arisen I was thinking last summer how happy they all were together
Either this or Charless illness has cast a gloom over the whole house The girls are both grown much graver
Amy graver said Mary quickly
I think so At least she did not seem to cheer up as I should have expected when her brother grew better She looks as if she had been nursing him too closely and yet I see her walking a good deal
Poor little Amy said Mary and she asked no more questions but was anxious to make her own observations
She did not see the Edmonstones till the next evening as the day was wet and she only received a little note telling her that one carriage would be sent to fetch her and Mr Ross The whole of the family except Charles were in the drawingroom but Mary looked chiefly at Amy She was in white with holly in her hair and did not look sorrowful but she was paler and thinner than last summer and though she spoke smiled and laughed when she ought it was without the gay childish freedom of former times She was a small pale quiet girl now not a merry caressing kitten Mary recollected what she had been in the wood last summer and was sure it was more than Charless illness that had altered her yet still Amy had not Lauras harassed look
Mary had not much talk with Amy for it was a large party with a good many young ladies and children and Amy had a great deal of work in the way of amusing them She had a wearied look and was evidently exerting herself to the utmost
You look tired said Mary kindly
No it is only stupidity said Amy smiling rather sadly We cant be entertaining without Charlie
It has been a melancholy winter began Mary but she was surprised for Amys face and neck coloured in a moment then recovering herself with some hesitation she said—
Oh but Charlie is much better and that is a great comfort I am glad you are come home Mary
We are going to have some magic music was said at the other end of the room Who will play
Little Amy said Mr Edmonstone Where is she She always does it to admiration Amy come and be a performer
Amy rose and came forward but the colour had flushed into her cheeks again and the recollection occurred to Mary that her fame as a performer in that way arose from the very amusing manner in which she and Sir Guy had conducted the game last year At the same moment her mother met her and whispered—
Had you rather not my dear
I can do it mamma thank you—never mind
I should like to send you up to Charlie—he has been so long alone
Oh thank you dear mamma with a look of relief
Here is Charlotte wild to be a musician said Mrs Edmonstone Perhaps you will see how she can manage for I think Charles must want a visit from his little nurse
Amy moved quietly away and entered Charless room full of warm gratitude for the kindness which was always seeking how to spare her
Charles was asleep and throwing a shawl round her she sat down in the dim light of the lamp relieved by the stillness only broken by now and then a louder note of the music downstairs It was very comfortable after all that buzz of talk and the jokes that seemed so nonsensical and tiresome There were but two people who could manage to make a party entertaining and that was the reason it was so different last year Then Amy wondered if she was the only person who felt sick at heart and dreary but she only wondered for a moment—she murmured half aloud to herself I said I never would think of him except at my prayers Here I am doing it again and on Christmas night I wont hide my eyes and moan over my broken reed for Christmas is come and the circles of song are widening round Glory good will peace on earth How he sang it last year the last thing when the people were gone before we went up to bed But I am breaking my resolution again I must do something
She took up a book of sacred poetry and began to learn a piece which she already nearly knew but the light was bad and it was dreamy work and probably she was half asleep for her thoughts wandered off to Sintram and the castle on the Mondenfelsen which seemed to her like what she had pictured the Redclyffe crags and the castle itself was connected in her imagination with the deep echoing porch while Guys own voice seemed to be chanting—
Who lives forlorn
On Gods own word doth rest
His path is bright
With heavenly light
His lot among the blest
Are you there Amy said Charles waking What are you staying here for Dont they want you
Mamma was so kind as to send me up
I am glad you are come for I have something to tell you Mr Ross has been up to see me you know and he has a letter from Guy
Amys heart beat fast and with eyes fixed on the ground she listened as Charles continued to give an account of Guys letter about Coombe Prior Mr Ross is quite satisfied about him Amy he concluded I wish you could have heard the decided way in which he said He will live it down
Amys answer was to stoop down and kiss her brothers forehead
Another week brought Guys renewal of the correspondence
Amy here is something for you to read said Charles holding up the letter as she came into the room
She knew the writing Wait one moment Charlie dear and she ran out of the room found her mother fortunately alone and said averting her face—Mamma dear do you think I ought to let Charlie show me that letter
Mrs Edmonstone took hold of her hand and drew her round so as to look into the face through its veiling curls The hand shook and the face was in a glow of eagerness Yes dearest said she for she could not help it and then as Amy ran back again she asked herself whether it was foolish and bad for her sweet little daughter then declared to herself that it must—it should—it would come right
There was not a word of Amy in the letter but it or something else made her more bright and cheerful than she had been for some time past It seemed as if the lengthening days of January were bringing renewed comfort with them when Charles who ever since October had been confined to bed was able to wear the Chinese dressinggown be lifted to a couch and wheeled into the dressingroom still prostrate but much enjoying the change of scene which he called coming into the world
These were the events at quiet Hollywell while Redclyffe was still engrossed with the shipwreck which seemed to have come on purpose to enliven and occupy this solitary winter It perplexed the Ashfords about their baronet more than ever Mr Ashford said that no one whose conscience was not clear could have confronted danger as he had done and yet the certainty that he was under a cloud and the sadness so inconsistent with his age and temperament still puzzled them Mrs Ashford thought she had made a discovery The second day after the wreck the whole crew except the little cabinboy were going to set off to the nearest seaport and the evening preceding their departure they were to meet their rescuers the fishermen at a supper in the great servants hall at the park Edward and Robert were in great glory bringing in huge branches of evergreens to embellish the clean cold place and Mr and Mrs Ashford and Grace were to come to see the entertainment after having some coffee in the library
Guy prepared it for his company by tumbling his books headlong from the sofa to a more remote ottoman sticking a bit of holly on the mantelshelf putting out his beloved old friend Strutts Sports and Pastimes to amuse Grace and making up an immense fire and then looking round thought the room was uncommonly comfortable but the first thing that struck Mrs Ashford when with face beaming welcome he ushered her in from the great hall was how forlorn rooms looked that had not a woman to inhabit them
The supper went off with great eclat Arnaud at the head of the table carved with foreign courtesies contrasted with the downright bluff way of the sailors As soon as Sir Guy brought Mrs Ashford to look in on them old James Robinson proposed his health with hopes he would soon come and live among them for good and Jonas Ledbury added another wish that Lady Morville might soon be there too At these words an expression of pain came upon Guys face his lips were rigidly pressed together he turned hastily away and paced up and down before he could command his countenance All were so busy cheering that no one heeded his change of demeanour save Mrs Ashford and though when he returned to the place where he had been standing his complexion was deepened his lip quivered and his voice trembled in returning thanks Mr Ashford only saw the emotion naturally excited by his peoples attachment
The lady understood it better and when she talked it over with her husband in the evening they were convinced the cause of his trouble must be some unfortunate attachment which he might think it his duty to overcome and having settled this they became very fond of him and anxious to make Redclyffe agreeable to him
Captain and crew departed the little boy was better and his hosts Charity and Jem Ledbury only wished to keep him for ever the sensation at Redclyffe was subsiding when one morning Markham came in a state of extreme satisfaction and importance to exhibit the county paper with a full account of the gallant conduct of the youthful baronet Two or three days after on coming home from a ride to Coombe Prior Guy found Lord Thorndales card and heard from Arnaud that my lord had made particular inquiries how long he would be in the country and had been to the cliff to see where the wreck was
Markham likewise attached great importance to this visit and went off into a long story about his influence and the representation of Moorworth or even of the county As soon as Guy knew what he was talking about he exclaimed Oh I hope all that is not coming on me yet Till I can manage Todd and Coombe Prior I am sure I am not fit to manage the country
A few mornings after he found on the table an envelope which he studied as if playing with his eagerness It had an Easthill postmark and a general air of Hollywell writing but it was not in the hand of either of the gentlemen nor was the tail of the y such as Mrs Edmonstone was wont to make It had even a resemblance to Amabels own writing that startled him He opened it at last and within found the hand he could not doubt—Charless namely—much more crooked than usual and the words shortened and blotted—
DEAR G—I ought not to do this but I must I have tyrannized over Charlotte and obtained the wherewithal Write me a full account of your gallant conduct I saw it first in As face It has done you great good with my father I will write more when I can I cant get on now C M E
He might well say he had first seen it in his sisters face She had brought him the paper and was looking for something he wanted her to read to him when Redclyffe Bay met her eye and then came the whole at one delightful glance He saw the heightened colour the exquisite smile the teardrop on the eyelash
Amy what have you there
She pointed to the place gave the paper into his hand and burst into tears the gush of triumphant feeling Not one was shed because she was divided from the hero of the shipwreck they were pure unselfish tears of joy exultation and thankfulness Charles read the history and she listened in silence then looked it over again with him and betrayed how thoroughly she had been taught the whole geography of Redclyffe Bay The next person who came in was Charlotte and as soon as she understood what occupied them she went into an ecstasy and flew away with the paper rushing with it straight into her fathers room where she broke into the middle of his letterwriting by reading it in a voice of triumph
Mr Edmonstone was delighted He was just the person who would be far more taken with an exploit of this kind such as would make a figure in the world than by steady perseverance in welldoing and his heart was won directly His wrath at the hasty words had long been diminishing and now was absolutely lost in his admiration Fine fellow noble fellow he said He is the bravest boy I ever heard of but I knew what was in him from the first I wish from my heart there was not this cloud over him I am sure the whole story has not a word of truth in it but he wont say a word to clear himself or else we would have him here again tomorrow
This was the first time Mr Edmonstone had expressed anything of real desire to recall Guy and it was what Charles meant in his letter
The tyranny over Charlotte was exercised while the rest were at dinner and they were alone together They talked over the adventure for the tenth time that day and Charles grew so excited that he vowed that he must at once write to Guy ordered her to give him the materials and when she hesitated forced her into it by declaring that he should get up and reach the things himself which would be a great deal worse She wanted to write from his dictation but he would not consent thinking that his mother might not consider it proper and he began vigorously but though long used to writing in a recumbent posture he found himself less capable now than he had expected and went on soliloquizing thus What a pen youve given me Charlotte There goes a blot Here another dip will you and take up that with the blotting paper before it becomes more like a spider
Wont you make a fresh beginning
No that has cost me too much already Ive got no more command over my fingers Here we go into the further corner of the paper Well C M E There tis—do it up will you If he can read it hell be lucky How my arms ache
I hope it has not hurt you Charlie but I am sure he will be very glad of it Oh I am glad you said that about Amy
Who told you to read it Puss
I could not help it tis so large
I believe I didnt ought to have said it Dont tell her I did said Charles but I couldnt for the life of me—or what is more to the purpose for the trouble of it—help putting it He is too true a knight not to hear that his lady not exactly smiled but cried
He is a true knight said Charlotte emphatically as with her best pen and with infinite satisfaction she indited the Sir Guy Morville Bart Redclyffe Park Moorworth only wishing she could lengthen out the words infinitely
Do you remember Charlie how we sat here the first evening he came and you took me in about the deadly feud
It was no takein said Charles only the feud is all on one side
Oh dear it has been such a stupid winter without Guy sighed Charlotte if this wont make papa forgive him I dont know what will
I wish it would with all my heart said Charles but logically if you understand the word Charlotte it does not make much difference to the accusation It would not exactly be received as exculpatory evidence in a court of justice
You dont believe the horrid stories
I believe that Guy has gamed quite as much as I have myself but I want to see him cleared beyond the power of Philip to gainsay or disbelieve it I should like to have such a force of proof as would annihilate Philip and if I was anything but what I am I would have it If you could but lend me a leg for two days Charlotte
I wish I could
One thing shall be done proceeded Charles my father shall go and meet him in person when he comes of age Now Don Philip is out of the way I trust I can bring that about
If he would but come here
No that must not be as mamma says till there is some explanation but if I was but in my usual state I would go with papa and meet him in London I wonder if there is any chance of it The 28th of March—ten weeks off If I can but get hold of those trusty crutches of mine by that time Ill do and Ill do and Ill do We will bring back Amys knight with flying colours
Oh how happy we should be
If I only knew what sort of sense that Markham of his may have I would give him a hint and set him to ferret out at St Mildreds Or shall I get Dr Mayerne to order me there for change of air
So schemed Charles while Guy on his side busied himself at Redclyffe as usual took care and thought for the cabinboy—returned Lord Thorndales call without finding him at home—saw the school finished and opened—and became more intimate with the Ashfords
He said he should not come home at Easter as he should be very busy reading for his degree and as his birthday this year fell in Holy Week there could be no rejoicings besides as he was not to have his property in his own hands till he was fiveandtwenty it would make no difference to the people The Ashfords agreed they had rather he was safe at home for the vacation and were somewhat anxious when he spoke of coming home to settle after he had taken his degree
For his own part he was glad the season would prevent any rejoicings for he was in no frame of mind to enter into them and his birthday had been so sad a day for his grandfather that he had no associations of pleasure connected with it
Markham understood the feeling liked it and shared it only saying that they would have their day of rejoicing when he married Guy could not answer and the old steward remarked the look of pain
Sir Guy said he is it that which is wrong with you Dont be angry with an old man for asking the question but I only would hope and trust you are not getting into any scrape
Thank you Markham said Guy after an effort I cannot tell you about it I will only set you at rest by saying it is nothing you could think I ought to be ashamed of
Then why—what has come between What could man or woman object to in you said Markham regarding him proudly
These unhappy suspicions said Guy
I cant make it out said Markham You must have been doing something foolish to give rise to them
Guy told nearly what he had said on the first day of his return but nothing could be done towards clearing up the mystery and he returned to Oxford as usual
March commenced and Charles though no longer absolutely recumbent and able to write letters again could not yet attempt to use his crutches so that all his designs vanished except that of persuading his father to go to London to meet Guy and Markham there and transact the business consequent on his wards attaining his majority He trusted much to Guys personal influence and said to his father You know no one has seen him yet but Philip and he would tell things to you that he might not to him
It was an argument that delighted Mr Edmonstone
Of course I have more weight and experience and—and poor Guy is very fond of us Eh Charlie
So Charles wrote to make an appointment for Guy to meet his guardian and Markham in London on Easter Tuesday If you will clear up the gambling story he wrote all may yet be well
Guy sighed as he laid aside the letter All in vain kind Charlie said he to himself vain as are my attempts to keep my poor uncle from sinking himself further Is it fair though continued he with vehemence that the happiness of at least one life should be sacrificed to hide one step in the ruin of a man who will not let himself be saved Is it not a waste of self-devotion Have I any right to sacrifice hers Ought I not rather—and a flash of joy came over him—to make my uncle give me back my promise of concealment I can make it up to him It cannot injure him since only the Edmonstones will know it But—and he pressed his lips firmly together—is this the spirit I have been struggling for this whole winter Did I not see that patient waiting and yielding is fit penance for my violence It would be ungenerous I will wait and bear contented that Heaven knows my innocence at least in this For her when at my best I dreaded that my love might bring sorrow on her—how much more now when I have seen my doom face to face and when the first step towards her would be what I cannot openly and absolutely declare to be right That would be the very means of bringing the suffering on her and I should deserve it
Guy quitted these thoughts to write to Markham to make the appointment finishing his letter with a request that Markham would stop at St Mildreds on his way to London and pay Miss Wellwood the lady with whom his uncles daughter was placed for her quarters board I hope this will not be a very troublesome request wrote Guy but I know you had rather I did it in this way than disobey your maxims as to not sending money by the post
The time before the day of meeting was spent in strengthening himself against the pain it would be to refuse his confidence to Mr Edmonstone and thus to throw away the last chance of reconciliation and of Amy This would be the bitterest pang of all—to see them ready to receive him and he forced to reject their kindness
So passed the preceding week and with it his twentyfirst birthday spent very differently from the way in which it would ordinarily be passed by a youth in his position It went by in hard study and sad musings in bracing himself to a resolution that would cost him all he held dear and as the only means of so bracing himself in trying to fix his gaze more steadily beyond the earth
Easter day steadied the gaze once more for him and as the past week had nerved him in the spirit of self-sacrifice the feast day brought him true unchanging joy shining out of sadness and enlightening the path that would lead him to keep his resolution to the utmost and endure the want of earthly hope
CHAPTER 25
Already in thy spirit thus divine
Whatever weal or woe betide
Be that high sense of duty still thy guide
And all good powers will aid a soul like thine
—SOUTHEY
Now for it thought Guy as he dismissed his cab and was shown upstairs in the hotel Give me the strength to withstand
The door was opened and he beheld Mr Edmonstone Markham and another—it surely was Sebastian Dixon All sprung up to receive him and Mr Edmonstone seizing him by both hands exclaimed—
Here he is himself Guy my boy my dear boy you are the most generous fellow in the world You have been used abominably I wish my two hands had been cut off before I was persuaded to write that letter but it is all right now Forget and forgive—eh Guy Youll come home with me and we will write this very day for Deloraine
Guy was almost giddy with surprise He held one of Mr Edmonstones hands and pressed it hard his other hand he passed over his eyes as if in a dream All right he repeated
All right said Mr Edmonstone I know where your money went and I honour you for it and there stands the man who told me the whole story I said from the first it was a confounded slander It was all owing to the little girl
Guy turned his face in amazement towards his uncle who was only waiting to explain Never till this morning had I the least suspicion that I had been the means of bringing you under any imputation How could you keep me in ignorance
You have told—
Of the cheque broke in Mr Edmonstone and of all the rest and of your providing for the little girl How could you do it with that pittance of an allowance of yours And Master Philip saying you never had any money No wonder indeed
If I had known you were pinching yourself said Dixon my mind would have revolted—
Let me understand it said Guy grasping the back of a chair Tell me Markham Is it really so Am I cleared Has Mr Edmonstone a right to be satisfied
Yes Sir Guy was Markhams direct answer Mr Dixon has accounted for your disposal of the thirty pound cheque and there is an end of the matter
Guy drew a long breath and the convulsive grasp of his fingers relaxed
I cannot thank you enough said he to his uncle then to Mr Edmonstone how is Charles
Better—much better you shall see him tomorrow—eh Guy
But I cannot explain about the one thousand pounds
Never mind—you never had it so you cant have misspent it Thats neither here nor there
And you forgive my language respecting you
Nonsense about that If you never said anything worse than that Philip was a meddling coxcomb you havent much to repent of and I am sure I was ten old fools when I let him bore me into writing that letter
No no you did right under your belief and circumstances were strong against me And is it clear Are we where we were before
We are—we are in everything only we know better what you are worth Guy Shake hands once more Theres an end of all misunderstanding and vexation and we shall be all right at home again
The shake was a mighty one Guy shaded his face for a moment or two and then said—
It is too much I dont understand it How did you know this matter wanted explanation said he turning to his uncle
I learnt it from Mr Markham and you will do me the justice to believe that I was greatly shocked to find that your generosity—
The truth of the matter is this said Markham You sent me to Miss Wellwoods at St Mildreds The principal was not within and while waiting for her to make the payment I got into conversation with her sister Miss Jane She told me that the child Mr Dixons daughter was always talking of your kindness especially of a morning at St Mildreds when you helped him in some difficulty I thought this threw some light on the matter found out Mr Dixon this morning and you see the result
I do indeed said Guy I wish I could attempt to thank you all
Thanks enough for me to see you look like yourself said Markham Did you think I was going to sit still and leave you in the mess you had got yourself into with your irregularity about keeping your accounts
And to you said Guy looking at his uncle as if it was especially pleasant to be obliged to him You never can guess what I owe to you
Nay I deserve no thanks at all said Sebastian since I was the means of bringing the imputation on you and I am sure it is enough for a wretch like me not to have brought only misery wherever I turn—to have done something to repair the evil I have caused Oh could I but bring back your father to what he was when first I saw him as you are now
He was getting into one of those violent fits of self-reproach at once genuine and theatrical of which Guy had a sort of horror and it was well Mr Edmonstone broke in like comedy into tragedy
Come whats past cant be helped and I have no end of work to be done so theres speechifying enough for once Mr Dixon you must not be going Sit down and look over the newspaper while we sign these papers You must dine with us and drink your nephews health though it is not his real birthday
Guy was much pleased that Mr Edmonstone should have given this invitation as well as with the consideration Markham had shown for Dixon in his narration Mr Dixon who had learnt to consider parents and guardians as foes and tyrants stammered and looked confused and enraptured but it appeared that he could not stay for he had a professional engagement He gave them an exhortation to come to the concert where he was employed and grew so ardent in his description of it that Guy could have wished to go but his companions were in haste to say there was far too much to do And the next moment Guy told himself that Mr Edmonstones goodnatured face and joyous eh Guy were more to him than any music he could hear nearer than Hollywell
He went downstairs with his uncle who all the way raved about the music satisfied to find ears that could comprehend and was too full of it even to attend or respond to the parting thanks for his last words were something about a magnificent countertenor
Guy walked up slowly trying to gather his thoughts but when it came back to him that Amy was his again his brain seemed to reel with ecstasy and it would have taken far more time than he could spare to recall his sober senses so he opened the door to convince himself at least of Mr Edmonstones presence and was received with another shake of the hand
So here you are again I was afraid he was carrying you off to his concert after all I believe you have half a mind for it Do you like to stay in London for the next Eh Guy and it was good to hear Mr Edmonstones hearty laugh as he patted his ward on the shoulder saw his blushing smiling shake of the head and gave a knowing look which let in a fresh light on Markham and luckily was unseen by Guy
Well continued Mr Edmonstone the man is more gentlemanlike than I expected A good sort of fellow at the bottom I dare say He was pretty considerably shocked to find he had brought you into such a scrape
He is very generous said Guy Oh there is much of a noble character in him
Noble humph put in Markham He has gone downhill fast enough since I used to see him in your fathers time but I am glad he had the decency not to be the undoing of you
His feeling is his great point said Guy when you can once get at it I wish— But breaking off short I cant make it out What did little Marianne tell you Or was it Miss Wellwood
It was first the youngest sister said Markham I sat there talking to her some little time she said you had been very kind to the family and the child was very grateful to you—was always talking of some morning when you and your dog came and helped her mother Her father had been out all night and her mother was crying she said and declaring he would be sent to prison till you came and helped them
Yes thats it said Guy
Well I remembered what you had told me of the mystery of the draft and guessed that this might be the clue to it I begged to see the child and in she came the very image of your mother and a sharp little thing that knew what she meant but had not much idea of the shame poor child about her father She told me the story of his coming home in the morning and her mother being in great distress and saying they were ruined till you came and talked to her mother and gave her something I asked if it was money and she said it was paper I showed her a draft and she knew it was like that So then I made her tell me where to find her father whom I used to know in old times and had to write to now and then I hunted him up and a creditable figure he was to be sure but I got the truth out of him at last and when he heard you had got into disgrace on his account he raved like a tragedy hero and swore he would come and tell your guardian the whole story I put him into a cab for fear he should repent and he had just got to the end of it when you came in
It is of no use to thank you again Markham
Why I have been getting your family out of scrapes these forty years or thereabouts said Markham tis all I am good for and if they had been no worse than this one it would be better for all of us But time is getting on and there is enough to do
To the accounts they went at once There was a good deal to be settled and though Guy had as yet no legal power according to his grandfathers will he was of course consulted about everything He was glad that since he could not be alone to bring himself to the realization of his newlyrecovered happiness he should have this sobering and engrossing occupation There he sat coolly discussing leases and repairs and only now and then allowing himself a sort of glimpse at the treasury of joy awaiting him whenever he had time to dwell on it The Coombe Prior matters were set in a better train the preliminary arrangements about the curacy were made and Guy had hopes it would be his friend Mr Wellwoods title for Orders
There was no time to write to Hollywell or rather Mr Edmonstone forgot to do so till it was too late and then consoled himself by observing that it did not signify if his family were taken by surprise since joy killed no one
His family were by no means of opinion that it did not signify when the next mornings post brought them no letter Mrs Edmonstone and Charles had hoped much and Amy did not know how much she hoped until the melancholy words no letter passed from one to the other
To make it worse by some of those mismanagements of Mr Edmonstones which used to run counter to his wifes arrangements a dinnerparty had been fixed for this identical Wednesday and the prospect was agreeable to no one especially when the four oclock train did not bring Mr Edmonstone who therefore was not to be expected till seven when all the world would be arrived
Laura helped Amy to dress put the flowers in her hair kissed her and told her it was a trying day and Amy sighed wearily thanked her and went down with arms twined in hers whispering If I could help being so foolish as to let myself have a little hope
Laura thought the case so hopeless that she was sorry Amy could not cease from the foolishness and did not answer Amy sat down at the foot of the sofa whither Charles was now carried down every day and without venturing to look at him worked at her netting A carriage—her colour came and went but it was only some of the guests another—the Brownlows Amy was speaking to Miss Brownlow when she heard more greetings she looked up caught by the arm of the sofa and looked again Her father was pouring out apologies and welcomes and her mother was shaking hands with Guy
Was it a dream She shut her eyes then looked again He was close to her by this time she felt his fingers close on her white glove for one moment but she only heard his voice in the earnest How are you Charlie Her father came to her gave her first his usual kiss of greeting then not letting her go looked at her for a moment and as if he could not help it kissed her on both cheeks and said How dye do my little Amy in a voice that meant unutterable things All the room was swimming round there was nothing for it but to run away and she ran but from the anteroom she heard the call outside Sir Guys bag to his room and she could not rush out among the servants At that moment however she spied Mary Ross and her father she darted up to them said something incoherent about Marys bonnet and took her up to her own room
Amy my dear you look wild What has come to you
Papa is come home and— the rest failed and Amy was as red as the camellia in her hair
And repeated Mary and the mystery is explained
Oh I dont know they are only just come and I was so silly I ran away—I did not know what to do
They are come are they thought Mary My little Amy I see it all
She made the taking off her bonnet and the settling her lace as elaborate an operation as she could and Amy flitted about as if she did not by any means know what she was doing A springy running step was heard on the stairs and in the passage and Mary though she could not see her little friends face perceived her neck turn red for a moment after which Amy took her arm pressed it affectionately and they went down
Mrs Edmonstone was very glad to see Amabel looking tolerably natural Mamma was of course burning to hear all but she was so confident that the essentials were safe that her present care was to see how her two young lovers would be able to comport themselves and to be on her guard against attending to them more than to her guests
Amy after passing by Charles and getting a squeeze from his eversympathizing hand put herself away behind Mary while Laura talked to every one hoping to show that there was some selfpossession in the family Guy reappeared but after one glance to see if Amy was present he did not look at her again but went and leant over the lower end of Charless sofa just as he used to do and Charles lay gazing at him and entirely forgetting what he had been trying to say just before to Mrs Brownlow professing to have come from London that morning and making the absent mistakes likely to be attributed to the lovers themselves
Mr Edmonstone came and dinner followed As Mrs Edmonstone paired off her company she considered what to do with her new arrival
If you had come two hours ago said she within herself I would have let you be at home Now you must be a great man and be content with me It will be better for Amy
Accordingly Guy was between her and Mrs Gresham She did not try to speak to him and was amused by his fitful attempts at making conversation with Mrs Gresham when it struck him that he ought to be taking notice of her Amy very fortunately in her own opinion was out of sight of him on the same side of the table next to Mr Ross who like his daughter guessed enough about the state of things to let her alone
Charles was enjoying all manner of delightful conjectures with Charlotte till the ladies returned to the drawingroom and then he said as much as he dared to Mary Ross far more than she had gained from Laura who as they came out of the diningroom had said—
Dont ask me any questions for I know nothing at all about it
Amy was talked to by Mrs Gresham about clubbooks and new flowers to which she was by this time able to attend very well satisfied that his happiness had returned and content to wait till the good time for knowing how She could even be composed when the gentlemen came in Guy talking to Mr Ross about Coombe Prior and then going to Charles but presently she saw no more for a request for music was made and she was obliged to go and play a duet with Laura She did not dislike this but there followed a persecution for some singing Laura would have spared her but could not and while she was turning over the book to try to find something that was not impossible to begin and Laura whispering encouragingly This—try this—your part is almost nothing or cant you do this another hand turned over the leaves as if perfectly at home in them and without speaking as if it was natural for him to spare Amy found a song which they had often sung together where she might join as much or as little as she chose under cover of his voice She had not a thought or sensation beyond the joy of hearing it again and she stood motionless as if in a trance When it was over he said to Laura I beg your pardon for making such bad work I am so much out of practice
Mrs Brownlow was seen advancing on them Amy retreated leaving Guy and Laura to fulfil all that was required of them which they did with a very good grace and Lauras old familiar feeling began to revive so much that she whispered while he was finding the place Dont you dislike all this excessively
It does as well as anything else thank you was the answer I can do it better than talking
At last they were released and the world was going away Mary could not help whispering to Mrs Edmonstone How glad you must be to get rid of us and as Mrs Edmonstone answered with a smile she ventured further to say—How beautifully Amy has behaved
Little Amy as soon as she had heard the last carriage roll off wished every one good night shook hands with Guy holding up the lighted candle between him and her face as a veil and ran away to her own room The others remained in a sort of embarrassed silence Mr Edmonstone rubbing his hands Laura lighted the candles Charlotte asked after Bustle and was answered that he was at Oxford and Charles laying hold of the side of the sofa pulled himself by it into a sitting posture
Shall I help you said Guy
Thank you but I am not ready yet besides I am an actual log now and am carried as such so it is of no use to wait for me Mamma shall have the first turn and I wont even leave my door open
Yes yes yes go and have it out with mamma next best to Amy herself as she is run away—eh Guy said Mr Edmonstone
Guy and Mrs Edmonstone had not hitherto trusted themselves to speak to each other but they looked and smiled then wishing the rest good night they disappeared Then there was a simultaneous outbreak of Well
All right said Mr Edmonstone Every word was untrue He is the noblest fellow in the world as I knew all the time and I was an old fool for listening to a pack of stories against him
Hurrah cried Charles drumming on the back of his sofa Let us hear how the truth came out and what it was
It was that Dixon There has he been helping that man for ever sending his child to school giving him sums upon sums paying his gaming debts with that cheque
Oh oh cried Charles
Yes that was it The child told Markham of it and Markham brought the father to tell me It puts me in a rage to think of the monstrous stories Philip has made me believe
I was sure of it cried Charles I knew it would come out that he had only been so much better than other people that nobody could believe it Cleared cleared Why Charlotte Mr Readytohalt will be for footing it cleverly enough as she was wildly curvetting round him
I was always sure said Mr Edmonstone I knew it was not in him to go wrong It was only Philip who would persuade me black was white
I never believed one word of it said Charles still less after I saw Philips animosity
Les absens ont toujours tort interrupted Laura then afraid of saying too much she added—Come Charlotte it is very late
And I shall be the first to tell Amy cried Charlotte Good night papa—good night Charlie
She rushed upstairs afraid of being forestalled Laura lingered putting some books away in the anteroom trying to overcome the weary pain at her heart She did not know how to be confident Her fathers judgment was worthless in her eyes and Philip had predicted that Amy would be sacrificed after all To see them happy made her sigh at the distance of her own hopes and worse than all was selfreproach for unkindness in not rejoicing with the rest in spite of her real affection for Guy himself When she thought of him she could not believe him guilty when she thought of Philips belief she could not suppose him innocent and she pitied her sister for enjoying a delusive happiness With effort however she went to her room and finding her a little overpowered by Charlottes tumultuous joy saw that peace and solitude were best for her till she could have more certain intelligence and after very tender goodnights carried off Charlotte
It would be hard to describe Mrs Edmonstones emotion as she preceded Guy to the dressingroom and sat down looking up to him as he stood in his old place by the fire She thought he did not look well though it might be only that the sunburnt colour had given place to his natural fairness his eyes though bright as ever did not dance and sparkle a graver expression sat on his brow and although he still looked very young a change there certainly was which made him man instead of boy—a look of having suffered and conquered suffering She felt even more motherly affection for him now than when he last stood there in the full tide of his first outburst of his love for her daughter and her heart was almost too full for speech but he seemed to be waiting for her and at last she said—I am very glad to have you here again
He smiled a little then said May I tell you all about it
Sit down here I want very much to hear it I am sure you have gone
through a good deal
I have indeed said he simply and gravely and there was a silence
while she was certain that whatever he might have endured he did not
feel it to have been in vain
But it is at an end said she I have scarcely seen Mr Edmonstone but he tells me he is perfectly satisfied
He is so kind as to be satisfied though you know I still cannot explain about the large sum I asked him for
We will trust you said Mrs Edmonstone smiling but I am very anxious to hear how you came to an understanding
Guy went over the story in detail and very much affected she was to hear how entirely unfounded had been the suspicion and how thankful he was for Mr Edmonstones forgiveness
You had rather to forgive us said she
You forget how ill I behaved said Guy colouring If you knew the madness of those first moments of provocation you would think that the penance of a lifetime instead of only one winter would scarce have been sufficient
You would not say as Charles does that the suspicion justified your anger
No indeed He paused and spoke again Thank Heaven it did not last long but the insight it gave me into the unsubdued evil about me was a fearful thing
But you conquered it They were the unguarded exclamations of the first shock Your whole conduct since especially the interview with Philip has shown that your anger has not been abiding and that you have learnt to subdue it
It could not abide for there was no just cause of offence Of course such a dreadful outburst warned me to be on my guard and you know the very sight of Philip is a warning that there is danger in that way I mean said Guy becoming conscious that he had been very severe I mean that I know of old that I am apt to be worried by his manner and that ought to make me doubly cautious
Mrs Edmonstone was struck by the soberer manner in which he spoke of his faults He was as ready to take full blame but without the vehemence which he used to expend in raving at himself instead of at the offender It seemed as if he had brought himself to the tone he used to desire so earnestly
I am very glad to be able to explain all to Philip he said
I will write as soon as possible Oh Mrs Edmonstone if you knew what it is to be brought back to such unhopedfor happiness to sit here once more with you—his voice trembled and the tears were in her eyes—to have seen her to have all overlooked and return to all I hoped last year I want to look at you all to believe that it is true he finished smiling
You both behaved very well this evening said she laughing because she could do so better than anything else at that moment
You both murmured Guy to himself
Ah little Amy has been very good this winter
He answered her with a beautiful expression of his eyes was silent a little while and suddenly exclaimed in a candid expostulating tone But now seriously dont you think it a very bad thing for her
My dear Guy said she scarcely repressing a disposition to laugh I told you last summer what I thought of it and you must settle the rest with Amy tomorrow I hear the drawingroom bell which is a sign I must send you to bed Good night
Good night repeated Guy as he held her hand It is so long since I have had any one to wish me good night Good night mamma
She pressed his hand then as he ran down to lend a helping hand in carrying Charles she the tears in her eyes crossed the passage to see how it was with her little Amy and to set her at rest for the night Amys candle was out and she was in bed lying full in the light of the Easter moon which poured in glorious whiteness through her window She started up as the door opened Oh mamma how kind of you to come
I can only stay a moment my dear your papa is coming up but I must just tell you that I have been having such a nice talk with dear Guy He has behaved beautifully and papa is quite satisfied Now darling I hope you will not lie awake all night or you wont be fit to talk to him tomorrow
Amy sat up in bed and put her arms round her mothers neck Then he is happy again she whispered I should like to hear all
He shall tell you himself tomorrow my dear Now good night you have been a very good child Now go to sleep my dear one
Amy lay down obediently Thank you for coming to tell me dear mamma she said I am very glad good night
She shut her eyes and there was something in the sweet obedient placid look of her face as the white moonlight shone upon it that made her mother pause and gaze again with the feeling only tenderer left by a beautiful poem Amy looked up to see why she delayed she gave her another kiss and left her in the moonlight
Little Amys instinct was to believe the best and do as she was bidden and there was a quietness and confidence in the tone of her mind which gave a sort of serenity of its own even to suspense A thankful happy sensation that all was well mamma said so and Guy was there had taken possession of her and she did not agitate herself to know how or why for mamma had told her to put herself to sleep so she thought of all the most thanksgiving verses of her store of poetry and before the moon had passed away from her window Amabel Edmonstone was wrapped in a sleep dreamless and tranquil as an infants
CHAPTER 26
Hence bashful cunning
And prompt me plain and holy innocence
I am your wife if you will marry me
—TEMPEST
Amabel awoke to such a sense of relief and repose that she scarcely liked to ask herself the cause lest it might ruffle her complete peace Those words all right seemed to be enough to assure her that the cloud was gone
Her mother came in told her one or two of the main facts and took her down under her wing only stopping by the way for a greeting to Charles who could not rise till after breakfast He held her fast and gazed up in her face but she coloured so deeply cast down her eyes and looked so meek and submissive that he let her go and said nothing
The breakfast party were for the most part quiet silent and happy Even Charlotte was hushed by the subdued feeling of the rest and Mr Edmonstones hilarity though replied to in turn by each failed to wake them into mirth Guy ran up and downstairs continually to wait upon Charles and thus the conversation was always interrupted as fast as it began so that the only fact that came out was the cause of the lateness of their arrival yesterday Mr Edmonstone had taken it for granted that Guy like Philip would watch for the right time and warn him while Guy being excessively impatient had been so much afraid of letting himself fidget as to have suffered the right moment to pass and then borne all the blame
How you must have wanted to play the Harmonious Blacksmith said Charlotte
I caught myself going through the motions twice said Guy
Mrs Edmonstone said to herself that he might contest the palm of temper with Amy even the difference being that hers was naturally sweet his a hasty one so governed that the result was the same When breakfast was over as they were rising Guy made two steps towards Amabel at whom he had hitherto scarcely looked and said very low in his straightforward way Can I speak to you a little while
Amys face glowed as she moved towards him and her mother said something about the drawingroom where the next moment she found herself She did not use any little restless arts to play with her embarrassment she did not torment the flowers or the chimney ornaments nor even her own rings she stood with her hands folded and her head a little bent down like a pendant blossom ready to listen to whatever might be said to her
He did not speak at first but moved uneasily about At last he came nearer and began speaking fast and nervously
Amabel I want you to consider—you really ought to think whether this is not a very bad thing for you
The drooping head was raised the downcast lids lifted up and the blue eyes fixed on him with a look at once confiding and wondering He proceeded—
I have brought you nothing but unhappiness already So far as you have taken any interest in me it could cause you only pain and the more I think of it the more unfit it seems that one so formed for light and joy and innocent mirth should have anything to do with the darkness that is round me Think well of it I feel as if I had done a selfish thing by you and now you know you are not bound You are quite free No one knows anything about it or if they did the blame would rest entirely with me I would take care it should So Amy think and think well before you risk your happiness
As to that replied Amy in a soft low voice with such a look of truth in her clear eyes I must care for whatever happens to you and I had rather it was with you than without you she said casting them down again
My Amy—my own—my Verena—and he held fast one of her hands as they sat together on the sofa—I had a feeling that so it might be through the very worst yet I can hardly believe it now
Guy said Amy looking up with the gentle resolution that had lately grown on her you must not take me for more than I am worth and I should like to tell you fairly I did not speak last time because it was all so strange and so delightful and I had no time to think because I was so confused But that is a long time ago and this has been a very sad winter and I have thought a great deal I know and you know too that I am a foolish little thing I have been silly little Amy always you and Charlie have helped me to all the sense I have and I dont think I could ever be a clever strongminded woman such as one admires
Heaven forbid ejaculated Guy moved perhaps by a certain remembrance of St Mildreds
But continued Amy I believe I do really wish to be good and I know you have helped me to wish it much more and I have been trying to learn to bear things and so—out came something very like a sunny smile though some tears followed—so if you do like such a silly little thing it cant be helped and we will try to make the best of her Only dont say any more about my being happier without you for one thing I am very sure of Guy I had rather bear anything with you than know you were bearing it alone I am only afraid of being foolish and weak and making things worse for you
So much worse But still he added speak as you may my Amy I cannot must not feel that I have a right to think of you as my own till you have heard all You ought to know what my temper is before you risk yourself in its power Amy my first thought towards Philip was nothing short of murder
She raised her eyes and saw how far entirely he meant what he said
The first—not the second she murmured
Yes the second—the third There was a moment when I could have given my soul for my revenge
Only a moment
Only a moment thank Heaven and I have not done quite so badly since I hope I have not suffered quite in vain but if that shock could overthrow all my wonted guards it might though I pray Heaven it may not it might happen again
I think you conquered yourself then and that you will again said Amy
And suppose I was ever to be mad enough to be angry with you
Amy smiled outright here Of course I should deserve it but I think the trouble would be the comforting you afterwards Mamma said—she added after a long silence during which Guys feeling would not let him speak—mamma said and I think that you are much safer and better with such a quick temper as yours because you are always struggling and fighting with it on the real true religious ground than a person more even tempered by nature but not so much in earnest in doing right
Yes if I did not believe myself to be in earnest about that I could never dare to speak to you at all
We will help each other said Amy you have always helped me long before we knew we cared for each other
And Amy if you knew how the thought of you helped me last winter even when I thought I had forfeited you for ever
Their talk only ceased when at one oclock Mrs Edmonstone who had pronounced in the dressingroom that three hours was enough for them at once came in and asked Guy to go and help to carry Charles downstairs
He went and Amy nestled up to her mother raising her face to be kissed
It is very nice she whispered and then arranged her brothers sofa as she heard his progress downstairs beginning He was so light and thin as to be very easily carried and was brought in between Guy and one of the servants When he was settled on the sofa he began thus—There was a grand opportunity lost last winter I was continually rehearsing the scene and thinking what waste it was to go through such a variety of torture without the dignity of danger If I could but have got up ever so small an alarm I would have conjured my father to send for Guy entreated pathetically that the reconciliation might be effected and have drawn my last breath clasping their hands thus The curtain falls
He made a feint of joining their hands put his head back and shut his eyes with an air and a grace that put Charlotte into an ecstasy and made even Amy laugh as she quitted the room blushing
But if it had been your last breath said Charlotte you would not have been much the wiser
I would have come to life again in time to enjoy the coup de theatre I had some thoughts of trying an overdose of opium but I thought Dr Mayerne would have found me out I tell you because it is fair I should have the credit for Guy if you knew what she was to me all the winter you would perceive my superhuman generosity in not receiving you as my greatest enemy
I shall soon cease to be surprised at any superhuman generosity said Guy But how thin you are Charlie you are a very feather to carry I had no notion it had been such a severe business
Most uncommon said Charles shaking his head with a mock solemnity
It was the worst of all said Mrs Edmonstone six weeks of constant pain
How very sorry Philip must have been exclaimed Guy
Philip said Charlotte
Why was it not owing to him Surely your father told me so Did not he let you fall on the stairs
My dear father exclaimed Charles laughing every disaster that happens for the next twelvemonth will be imputed to Philip
How was it then said Guy
The fact was this said Charles it was in the thick of the persecution of you and I was obliged to let Philip drag me upstairs because I was in a hurry He took the opportunity of giving me some impertinent advice which I could not stand I let go his arm forgetting what a dependent mortal I am and down I should assuredly have gone if he had not caught me and carried me off as a fox does a goose so it was his fault as one may say in a moral though not in a physical sense
Then said his mother you do think your illness was owing to that accident
I suppose the damage was brewing and that the shake brought it into an active state Theres a medical opinion for you
Well I never knew what you thought of it before said Mrs Edmonstone
Why when I had a condor to pick on Guys account with Philip I was not going to pick a crow on my own said Charles Oh is luncheon ready and you all going I never see anybody now I want the story of the shipwreck though of course Ben Whatshisname was the hero and Sir Guy Morville not a bit of it
Laura wanted to walk to East Hill and the other young people agreed to go thither too
It will be nice to go to church there today said Amy in a halfwhisper heard only by Guy and answered by a look that showed how well he understood and sympathized
Another thing said Amy colouring a good deal shall you mind my telling Mary I behaved so oddly last night and she was so kind to me that I think I ought
Mary had seen enough last night to be very curious today though hardly expecting her curiosity to be gratified However as she was putting on her bonnet for church she looked out of her window and saw the four coming across the fields from Hollywell Guy and Amy did not walk into the village arminarm but as they came under the church porch Guy unseen by all held out his hand sought hers and for one moment pressed it fervently Amy knew he felt this like their betrothal
After the service they stood talking with Mr Ross and Mary for some little time Amy held apart and Mary saw how it was As they were about to turn homewards Amy said quickly Come and walk a little way home with me
She went on with Mary before the rest and when out of sight of them all said Mary and then stopped short
I guess something Amy said Mary
Dont tell any one but Mr Ross
Then I have guessed right My dear little Amy I am very glad So that was the reason you flew out of the room last evening and looked so bright and glowing
It was so good of you to ask no questions
I dont think I need ask any now Amy for I see in your face how right and happy it all is
I cant tell you all Mary but I must one thing—that the whole terrible story arose from his helping a person in distress I like you to know that
Papa was always sure that he had not been to blame said Mary
Yes so Charlie told me and that is the reason I wanted you to know
Then Amy something of this had begun last summer
Yes but not as it is now I did not half know what it was then
Poor dear little Amy said Mary what a very sad winter it must have been for you
Oh very said Amy but it was worse for him because he was quite alone and here every one was so kind to me Mamma and Laura and poor Charlie through all his illness and pain he was so very kind And do you know Mary now it is all over I am very glad of this dismal time for I think that it has taught me how to bear things better
She looked very happy Yet it struck Mary that it was strange to hear that the first thought of a newlybetrothed maiden was how to brace herself in endurance She wondered however whether it was not a more truly happy and safe frame than that of most girls looking forward to a life of unclouded happiness such as could never be realized At least so it struck Mary though she owned to herself that her experience of lovers was limited
Mary walked with Amy almost to the borders of Hollywell garden and when the rest came up with them though no word passed there was a great deal of congratulation in her warm shake of Guys hand and no lack of reply in his proud smile and reddening cheek Charlotte could not help turning and going back with her a little way to say Are not you delighted Mary Is not Amy the dearest thing in the world And you dont know for it is a secret and I know it how very noble Guy has been while they would suspect him
I am very very glad indeed It is everything delightful
I never was so happy in my life said Charlotte nor Charlie either Only think of having Guy for our brother and he is going to send for Bustle tomorrow
Mary laughed and parted with Charlotte speculating on the cause of Lauras graver looks Were they caused by the fear of losing her sister or by a want of confidence in Guy
That evening how happy was the party at Hollywell when Charles put Guy through a crossexamination on the shipwreck from the first puff of wind to the last drop of rain and Guy submitted very patiently since he was allowed the solace of praising his Redclyffe fishermen
Indeed this time was full of tranquil serene happiness It was like the lovely weather only to be met with in the spring and then but rarely when the sky is cloudless and intensely blue—the sunshine one glow of clearness without burning—not a breath of wind checks the silent growth of the expanding buds of light exquisite green Such days as these shone on Guy and Amabel looking little to the future or if they did so at all with a grave peaceful awe reposing in the present and resuming old habits—singing reading gardening walking as of old and that intercourse with each other that was so much more than ever before
It was more but it was not quite the same for Guy was a very chivalrous lover the polish and courtesy that sat so well on his frank truthful manners were even more remarkable in his courtship His ways with Amy had less of easy familiarity than in the time of their brotherandsisterlike intimacy so that a stranger might have imagined her wooed not won It was as if he hardly dared to believe that she could really be his own and treated her with a sort of reverential love and gentleness while she looked up to him with everincreasing honour She was better able to understand him now than in her more childish days last summer and she did not merely see as before that she was looking at the upper surface of a mystery He had at the same time grown in character his excitability and oversensitiveness seemed to have been smoothed away and to have given place to a calmness of tone that was by no means impassibility
When alone with Amy he was generally very grave often silent and meditative or else their talk was deep and serious and even with the family he was less merry and more thoughtful than of old though very bright and animated and showing full free affection to them all as entirely accepted and owned as one of them
So indeed he was Mr Edmonstone with his intense delight in lovers patronized them and made commonplace jokes which they soon learnt to bear without much discomposure Mrs Edmonstone was all that her constant appellation of mamma betokened delighting in Guys having learnt to call her so Charles enjoyed the restoration of his friend the sight of Amys happiness and the victory over Philip and was growing better every day Charlotte was supremely happy watching the first love affair ever conducted in her sight and little less so in the return of Bustle who resumed his old habits as regularly as if he had only left Hollywell yesterday
Laura alone was unhappy She did not understand her own feelings but sad at heart she was with only one who could sympathize with her and he far away and the current of feeling setting against him She could not conceal her depression and was obliged to allow it to be attributed to the grief that one sister must feel in parting with another and as her compassion for her little Amy coupled with her dread of her latent jealousy made her particularly tender and affectionate it gave even more probability to the supposition This made Guy who felt as if he was committing a robbery on them all particularly kind to her as if he wished to atone for the injury of taking away her sister and his kindness gave her additional pain at entertaining such hard thoughts of him
How false she felt when she was pitied and how she hated the congratulations of which she had the full share She thought however that she should be able to rejoice when she had heard Philips opinion and how delightful it would be for him to declare himself satisfied with Guys exculpation
CHAPTER 27
I forgave thee all the blame
I could not forgive the praise
—TENNYSON
If ever there was a meddlesome coxcomb on this earth Such was the exclamation that greeted the ears of Guy as he supported Charles into the breakfastroom and at the same time Mr Edmonstone tossed a letter into Guys plate saying—
Theres something for you to read
Guy began his lips were tightly pressed together his brows made one black line across his forehead and his eye sparkled even through his bentdown eyelashes but this lasted only a few moments the forehead smoothed again and there was a kind of deliberate restraint and force upon himself which had so much power that no one spoke till he had finished folded it up with a sort of extra care and returned it only saying
You should not show one such letters Mr Edmonstone
Does not it beat everything cried Mr Edmonstone If that is not impertinence I should like to know what is But he has played my Lord Paramount rather too long as I can tell him I ask his consent forsooth Probation indeed You might marry her tomorrow and welcome There give it to mamma See if she does not say the same Mere spite and malice all along
Poor Laura would no one refute such cruel injustice Yes Guy spoke eagerly—
No no that it never was He was quite right under his belief
Dont tell me Not a word in his favour will I hear stormed on Mr Edmonstone Mere envy and illwill
I always told him so said Charles Pure malignity
Nonsense Charlie said Guy sharply there is no such thing about him
Come Guy I cant stand this said Mr Edmonstone I wont have him defended I never thought to be so deceived but you all worshipped the boy as if every word that came out of his mouth was Gospel truth and youve set him up till he would not condescend to take an advice of his own father who little thought what an upstart sprig he was rearing but I tell him he has come to the wrong shop for domineering—eh mamma
Well cried Mrs Edmonstone who had read till near the end with tolerable equanimity this really is too bad
Mamma and all thought poor Laura while her mother continued—It is wilful prejudice to say the least—I never could have believed him capable of it
Charles next had the letter and was commenting on it in a style of mingled sarcasm and fury while Laura longed to see it justify itself, as she was sure it would
Read it all of you—every bit said Mr Edmonstone that you may see this paragon of yours
I had rather not said Amy shrinking as it came towards her
I should like you to do so if you dont dislike it very much said Guy
She read in silence and then came the turn of Laura who marvelled at the general injustice as she read
CORK April 8th
MY DEAR UNCLE—I am much obliged to you for the communication of your
intention with regard to Amabel but indeed I must say I am a good
deal surprised that you should have so hastily resolved on so important
a step and have been satisfied with so incomplete an explanation of
circumstances which appeared to you as well as to myself to show that
Guys character was yet quite unsettled and his conduct such as to
create considerable apprehension that he was habitually extremely
imprudent to say the least of it in the management of his own affairs
How much more unfit therefore to have the happiness of another
intrusted to him I believe—indeed I understood you to have declared
to me that you were resolved never to allow the engagement to be
renewed unless he should with the deference which is only due to
you as his guardian consent to clear up the mystery with which he
has thought fit to invest all his pecuniary transactions and this it
appears he refuses as he persists in denying all explanation of his
demand for that large sum of money As to the cheque which certainly
was applied to discreditable uses though I will not suffer myself to
suppose that Guy was in collusion with his uncle yet it is not at
all improbable that Dixon not being a very scrupulous person may on
hearing of the difficulties in which his nephew has been placed come
forward to relieve him from his embarrassment in the hope of further
profit by thus establishing a claim on his gratitude In fact this
proof of secretly renewed intercourse with Dixon rather tends to
increase the presumption that there is something wrong I am not writing
this in the expectation that the connection should be entirely broken
off for that indeed would be out of the question as things stand at
present but for my little cousins sake as well as his own I entreat
of you to pause They are both extremely young—so young that if there
was no other ground many persons would think it advisable to wait a few
years and why not wait until the time fixed by his grandfather for
his coming into possession of his property If the character of his
attachment to Amabel is firm and true the probation may be of infinite
service to him as keeping before him during the most critical period
of his life a powerful motive for restraining the natural impetuosity
of his disposition while on the other hand if this should prove
to have been a mere passing fancy for the first young lady into whose
society he has been thrown on terms of easy familiar intercourse you
will then have the satisfaction of reflecting that your care and caution
have preserved your daughter from a life of misery My opinion has
never altered respecting him that he is brave and generous with good
feelings and impulses manners peculiarly attractive and altogether a
character calculated to inspire affection but impetuous and unsteady
easily led into temptation yet obstinate in reserve and his temper of
unchecked violence I wish him happiness of every kind and as you well
know would do my utmost for his welfare but my affection for your
whole family and my own conscientious conviction make me feel it my
duty to offer this remonstrance which I hope will be regarded as by no
means the result of any illwill but simply of a sincere desire for the
good of all parties such as can only be evinced by plain speaking
Yours affectionately
P MORVILLE
All the time Laura was reading Guy was defending Philip against the exaggerated abuse that Mr Edmonstone and Charles were pouring out till at last Mrs Edmonstone getting out of patience said—
My dear Guy if we did not know you so well we should almost accuse you of affectation
Then I shall go away said Guy laughing as he rose Can you come out with me said he in a lower tone leaning over the back of Amys chair
No wait a bit interposed Mr Edmonstone dont take her out or you wont be to be found anywhere and I want to speak to you before I write my letter and go to the Union Meeting I want to tell Master Philip on the spot that the day is fixed and we snap our fingers at him and his probation Wait till twentyfive I dare say
At I want to speak to you the ladies had made the first move towards departure but they were not out of hearing at the conclusion Guy looked after Amy but she would not look round and Charles lay twisting Bustles curls round his fingers and smiling to himself at the manner in which the letter was working by contraries The overthrow of Philips influence was a great triumph for him apart from the way in which it affected his friend and his sister
Mr Edmonstone was disappointed that Guy would not set about fixing the day in time for him to announce it in a letter to be written in the course of an hour Guy said he had not begun on the subject with Amy and it would never do to hurry her Indeed it was a new light to himself that Mr Edmonstone would like it to take place so soon
Pray when did you think it was to be said Mr Edmonstone Upon my word I never in all my days saw a lover like you Guy
I was too happy to think about the future besides I did not know whether you had sufficient confidence in me
Confidence nonsense I tell you if I had a dozen daughters I would trust them all to you
Guy smiled and was infected by Charless burst of laughing but Mr Edmonstone went on unheeding—I have the most absolute confidence in you I am going to write to Philip this minute to tell him he has played threetailed Bashaw rather too long I shall tell him it is to be very soon at any rate and that if he wishes to see how I value his pragmatical advice he may come and dance at the wedding I declare your mamma and that colonel of his have perfectly spoilt him with their flattery I knew what would come of it you all would make a prodigy of him till he is so puffed up that he entirely forgets who he is
Not I said Charles that cant be laid to my door
But Ill write him such a letter this instant as shall make him remember what he is and show him who he has to deal with Eh Charlie
Dont you think said Guy preparing to go that it might be better to wait a day or two till we see our way clearer and are a little cooler
I tell you Guy there is no one that puts me out of patience now but yourself You are as bad as Philip himself Cool I am coolness itself all but whats proper spirit for a man to show when his family is affronted and himself dictated to by a meddling young jackanapes Ill serve him out properly
A message called him away Guy stood looking perplexed and sorrowful
Never mind said Charles Ill take care the letter is moderate Besides it is only Philip and he knows that letterwriting is not his forte
I am afraid things will be said in irritation which you will both regret There are justice and reason in the letter
There shall be more in the answer as you will see
No I will not see It is Mr Edmonstones concern not mine I am the last person who should have anything to do with it
Just what the individual in question would not have said
Would you do one thing to oblige me Charlie
Anything but not speaking my mind to or of the captain
That is the very thing unluckily Try to get the answer put off till tomorrow and that will give time to look at this letter candidly
All the candour in the world will not make me think otherwise than that he is disappointed at being no longer able to make us the puppets of his malevolence Dont answer or if you do tell me what you say in favour of that delicate insinuation of his
Guy made a step towards the window and a step back again Tis not fair to ask such questions he replied after a moment It is throwing oil on the fire I was trying to forget it He neither knows my uncle nor the circumstances
Well I am glad there is a point on which you cant even pretend to stand up for him or I should have thought you crazed with Quixotism But I am keeping you when you want to be off to Amy Never mind Mr Readytohalt I shall wait till my father comes back If you want the letter put off you had better give some hopes of—Oh he is gone and disinterested advice it is of mine for what is to become of me without Amy remains to be proved Laura poor thing looks like Patience on a monument I wonder whether Philips disgrace has anything to do with it Hum If mammas old idea was right the captain has been more like moth and candle than consistent with his prudence unless he thought it a toute epreuve I wonder what came to pass last autumn when I was ill and mammas head full of me He may not intend it and she may not know it but I would by no means answer for Cupids being guiltless of that harassed look she has had ever since that ballgoing summer Oh there go that pretty study Amy and her true knight As to Guy he is more incomprehensible than ever yet there is no avoiding obeying him on the principle on which that child in the Moorland cottage said she should obey Don Quixote
So when his father came in Charles wiled him into deferring the letter till the next day by giving him an indistinct hope that some notion when the marriage would be might be arrived at by that time He consented the more readily because he was in haste to investigate a complaint that had just been made of the union doctor but his last words to his wife and son before he went were—Of course they must marry directly there is nothing on earth to wait for Live at Redclyffe alone Not to be thought of No Ill see little Amy my Lady Morville before Philip goes abroad if only to show him I am not a man to be dictated to
Mrs Edmonstone sighed but when he was gone she agreed with Charles that there was nothing to wait for and that it would be better for Guy to take his wife at once with him when he settled at Redclyffe So it must be whenever Amy could make up her mind to it and thereupon they made plans for future meetings Charles announcing that the Prince of the Black Isles would become locomotive and Charlotte forming grand designs upon Shag Island
In the meantime Guy and Amy were walking in the path through the wood where he began I would not have asked you to do anything so unpleasant as reading that letter but I thought you ought to consider of it
It was just like himself How could he said Amy indignantly
I wonder whether he will ever see his own harshness said Guy It is very strange that with all his excellence and real kindness there should be some distortion in his view of all that concerns me I cannot understand it
You must let me call it prejudice Guy in spite of your protest It is a relief to say something against him
Amy dont be venomous said Guy in a playful tone of reproach
Yes but you know it is not me whom he has been abusing
Well said Guy musingly I suppose it is right there should be this cloud or it would be too bright for earth It has been one of my chief wishes to have things straight with Philip ever since the time he stayed at Redclyffe as a boy I saw his superiority then but it fretted me and I never could make a companion of him Ever since I have looked to his approval as one of the best things to be won It shows his ascendancy of character yet do what I will the mist has gone on thickening between us and with reason for I have never been able to give him the confidence he required and his conduct about my uncle has so tried my patience that I never have been quite sure whether I ought to avoid him or not
And now you are the only person who will speak for him I dont wonder papa is provoked with you said she pretending to be wilful I only hope you dont want to make me do the same I could bear anything better than his old saying about your attractive manners and good impulses and his opinion that has never altered O Guy he is the most provoking person in all the world Dont try to make me admire him nor be sorry for him
Not when you remember how he was looked on here and how without doing anything worthy of blame nay from his acting unsparingly as he thought right every one has turned against him even mamma who used to be so fond of him
Not Laura
No not Laura and I am thankful to her for it for all this makes me feel as if I had supplanted him
Yes yes yes it is like you but dont ask me to feel that yet said Amy with tears in her eyes or I shall be obliged to tell you what you wont like to hear about his tone of triumph that terrible time last year It was so very different I dont think I could ever forgive him if it had not made me so miserable too
Guy pressed her arm Yes but he thought himself right He meant to do the kindest thing by you said he so entirely without effort that no one could doubt it came straight from his heart So he thinks still Amy there is fairness justice good sense in his letter and we must not blind our eyes to it though there is injustice at least harshness I did fail egregiously in my first trial
Fail
In temper
Oh
And Amy I wanted to ask what you think about the four years he speaks of Do you think as he says my habits might be more fixed and altogether you might have more confidence
I dont look on you quite as he does now said Amy with a very pretty smile Do you think his opinion of you will ever alter
But what do you think Is there not some reason in what he says
The only use I can see is that perhaps I should be wiser at twentyfour and fitter to take care of such a great house but then you have been always helping me to grow wiser and I am not much afraid but that you will be patient with me Indeed Guy I dont know whether it is a thing I ought to say she added blushing but I think it would be dismal for you to go and live all alone at Redclyffe
Honestly Amy replied he after a little pause if you feel so and your father approves I dont think it will be better to wait I know your presence is a safeguard and if the right motives did not suffice to keep me straight and I was only apparently so from hopes of you why then I should be so utterly good for nothing at the bottom if not on the surface that you had better have nothing to say to me
Amy laughed incredulously
That being settled proceeded Guy did you hear what your father said as you left the breakfastroom
She coloured all over and there was silence What did you answer said she at length
I said whatever happened you must not be taken by surprise in having to decide quickly Do you wish to have time to think Ill go in and leave you to consider if you like
I only want to know what you wish said Amy not parting with his arm
I had rather you did just as suits you best Of course you know what my wish must be
Amy walked on a little way in silence Very well said she presently I think you and mamma had better settle it The worst—she had tears in her eyes—the going away—mamma—Charlie—all that will be as bad at one time as at another The tears flowed faster It had better be as you all like best
O Amy I wonder at myself for daring to ask you to exchange your bright cheerful home for my gloomy old house
No your home said Amy softly
I used to wonder why it was called gloomy but it will be so no more when you are there Yet there is a shadow hanging over it which makes it sometimes seem too strange that you and it should be brought together
I have read somewhere that there is no real gloom but what people raise for themselves
True Gloom is in sin not sorrow Yes there would be no comfort if I were not sure that if aught of grief or pain should come to you through me it will not cannot really hurt you my Amy
No unless by my own fault and you will help me to meet it Hark was that a nightingale
Yes the first How beautiful There—dont you see it Look on that hazel you may see its throat moving Well when they had listened for a long time—after all that creature and the sea will hardly let one speak of gloom even in this world to say nothing of other things
The sea I am glad I have never seen it because now you will show it to me for the first time
You will never can never imagine it Amy and he sung—
With all tones of waters blending
Glorious is the breaking deep
Glorious beauteous without ending
Songs of ocean never sleep
A silence followed only broken by the notes of the birds and presently by the strokes of the great clock Guy looked at his watch
Eleven Amy I must go to my reading or you will have to be very much ashamed of me
For after the first few days Guy had returned to study regularly every day He said it was a matter of necessity not at all of merit for though he did not mean to try for honours Amy must not marry a plucked man His whole career at Oxford had been such a struggle with the disadvantages of his education that all his diligence had he thought hardly raised him to a level with his contemporaries Moreover courtship was not the best preparation for the schools so that though he knew he had done his best he expected no more than to pass respectably and told Amy it was very good of her to be contented with a dunce whereat she laughed merrily But she knew him too well to try to keep him lingering in the April sunshine and in they went Guy to his Greek and Amy to her mother Charlottes lessons had been in abeyance or turned over to Laura of late and Mrs Edmonstone and her dressingroom were always ready for the confidences of the family who sought her there in turn—all but one and that the one whose need was the sorest
Amy and her mother comforted themselves with a good quiet cry that was not exactly sorrowful and came to the conclusion that Guy was the most considerate person in the world and they would do whatever best suited him and papa So when Mr Edmonstone came home he was rewarded for putting off the letter by finding every one willing to let the marriage take place whenever he pleased There were various conferences in the dressingroom and Guy and Amy both had burning faces when they came down to dinner Laura beheld them with a throbbing heart while she mechanically talked to Dr Mayerne as if nothing was going on She was glad there was no singing that evening for she felt incapable of joining and when at night Charles and his father talked of sitting up to write to Philip the misery was such that she had no relief till she had shut herself in her room to bear or to crush the suffering as best she might
She was still sitting helpless in her wretchedness when Amy knocked at the door and came in glowing with blushes and smiles though her eyelashes were dewy with tears
Laura dearest if you would not be so very unhappy I wish I knew what to do for you
Laura laid her head on her shoulder and cried It was a great comfort little as Amy could understand her trouble Amy kissed her soothed her caressingly cried too and said in broken sentences how often they would be together and how comfortable it was that Charlie was so much better and Charlotte quite a companion
Then you have fixed the day whispered Laura at last
The Tuesday in Whitsunweek returned Amy resting her forehead on Lauras shoulder They all thought it right
Laura flung her arms round her and wept too much to speak
Dear dear Laura said Amy after a time it is very kind of you but—
Oh Amy you dont know You must not think so much better of me than I deserve It is not only—No I would not be so selfish if but—but— Never had her selfcommand so given way
Ah you are unhappy about Philip said Amy and Laura alarmed lest she might have betrayed him started and tried to recover herself but she saw Amy was quite unsuspicious and the relief from this fright helped her through what her sister was saying—Yes you who were so fond of him must be vexed at this unkindness on his part
I am sure it is his real wish for your good murmured Laura
I dare say said Amy with displeasure Then changing her tone I beg your pardon dear Laura but I dont think I can quite bear to hear any one but Guy defend him
It is very generous
Oh is not it Laura and he says he is so grieved to see us turned against Philip after being so fond of him he says it makes him feel as if he had supplanted him and that he is quite thankful to you for taking his part still
How shall I bear it sighed Laura to herself
I wonder whether he will come said Amy thoughtfully
He will said Laura
You think so said Amy Well Guy would be glad Yes O Laura if Philip would learn to do Guy justice I dont think there would be any more to wish
He will in time said Laura He is too generous not to be won by such generosity as Guys and when all this is forgotten and all these accusations have been lived down he will be the warmest of friends
Yes said Amy as if she wished to be convinced but if he would only leave off saying his opinion has never altered I think I could bring myself to look on him as Guy wants me to do Good night dear Laura and dont be unhappy Oh one thing I must tell you Guy made Charles promise to do all he could not to let it be a hasty letter Now good night
Poor Laura she knew not whether gratitude to Guy was not one of her most painful sensations She wished much to know what had been said in the letter but only one sentence transpired and that was that Mr Edmonstone had never heard it was necessary to apply to a nephew for consent to a daughters marriage It seemed as if it must have been as cutting as Charles could make it but Laura trusted to Philips knowledge of the family and desire for their good to make him forgive it and the expectation of seeing him again at the wedding cheered her Indeed a hope of still greater consequences began to rise in her mind after Charles one day said to her I think you ought to be much obliged to Guy This morning he suddenly exclaimed I say Charlie I wish you would take care Amys fortune is not settled on her so that it cant be got rid of I asked how he meant to make ducks and drakes of it and he explained that if either of you two did not happen to marry for money like Amy it might do you no harm
We are very much obliged to him said Laura more earnestly than Charles had expected Do you know what it is Charlie
Oh you want to calculate the amount of your obligation Somewhere about five thousand pounds I believe
Charles watched Laura and the former idea recurred as he wondered whether there was any particular meaning in her inquiry
Meaning indeed there was Laura knew nothing about the value of money she did not know what Philip had of his own how far five or even ten thousand would go in enabling them to marry or whether it was available in her fathers lifetime but she thought this prospect might smooth the way to the avowal of their attachment as effectually as his promotion she reckoned on relief from the weary oppression of secrecy and fully expected that it would all be told in the favourable juncture when her parents were full of satisfaction in Amys marriage Gratitude to Guy would put an end to all doubt dislike and prejudice and Philip would receive him as a brother
These hopes supported Laura and enabled her to take part with more appearance of interest in the consultations and arrangements for the marriage which were carried on speedily as the time was short and Mr Edmonstones ideas were on a grand scale It seemed as if he meant to invite all the world and there were no limits to his views of breakfast carriages and splendours His wife let him run on without contradiction leaving the plans either to evaporate or condense as time might prove best Guy took Amy out walking and asked what she thought of it
Do you dislike it very much she said
I can hardly tell Of course as a general rule the less parade and nonsense the better but if your father wishes it and if people do find enjoyment in that way it seems hard they should not have all they can out of it
Oh yes the school children and poor people said Amy
How happy the Ashford children will be feasting the poor people at Redclyffe Old Jonas Ledbury will be in high glory
To be sure it does not seem like merit to feast ones poor neighbours rather than the rich It is so much pleasanter
However since the poor will be feasted I dont think the rich ones will do us much harm
I am sure I shall know very little about them said Amy
The realities are so great to us that they will swallow up the accessories There must be the church and all that and for the rest Amy I dont think I shall find out whether you wear lace or grogram
Theres encouragement for me said Amy laughing However what I mean is that I dont care about it if I am not obliged to attend and give my mind to those kind of things just then and that mamma will take care of
Is it not a great trouble for her I forgot that It was selfish for we slip out of the fuss and it all falls on her
Yes said Amy but dont you think it would tease her more to have to persuade papa out of what he likes and alter every little matter That would be worry the rest only exertion and do you know I think said she with a rising tear that it will be better for her to keep her from thinking about losing me
I see Very well we will take the finery quietly Only one thing Amy we will not be put out of—we will not miss the full holyday service
Oh yes that will be the comfort
One other thing Amy You know I have hardly a friend of my own but there is one person I should like to ask—Markham He has been so kind and so much attached to me he loved my father so devotedly and suffered so much at his death that it is a pity he should not be made happy and very happy he will be
And there is one person I should like to ask Guy if mamma thinks we can do it I am sure little Marianne ought to be one of my bridesmaids Charlotte would take care of her and it would be very nice to have her
CHAPTER 28
But no kind influence deign they shower
Till pride be quelled and love be free
—SCOTT
Kilcoran was about twenty miles from Cork and Captain Morville was engaged to go and spend a day or two there Maurice de Courcy drove him thither wishing all the way for some other companion since no one ever ventured to smoke a cigar in the proximity of Morville and besides Maurices conversational powers were obliged to be entirely bestowed on his horse and dog for the captain instead of as usual devoting himself to suit his talk to his audience was wrapped in the deepest meditation now and then taking out a letter and referring to it
This letter was the reply jointly compounded by Mr Edmonstone and Charles and the subject of his consideration was whether he should accept the invitation to the wedding Charles had taken care fully to explain how the truth respecting the cheque had come out and Philip could no longer suspect that it had been a fabrication of Dixons but while Guy persisted in denial of any answer about the thousand pounds he thought the renewal of the engagement extremely imprudent He was very sorry for poor little Amy for her comfort and happiness were he thought placed in the utmost jeopardy with such a hot temper under the most favourable circumstances and there was the further peril that when the novelty of the life with her at Redclyffe had passed off Guy might seek for excitement in the dissipation to which his uncle had probably already introduced him In the four years probation he saw the only hope of steadying Guy or of saving Amy and he was much concerned at the rejection of his advice entirely for their sakes for he could not condescend to be affronted at the scornful satirical tone towards himself in which Charless little spitefulness was so fully apparent
The wedding was a regular sacrifice and Amabel was nothing but a victim but an invitation to Hollywell had a charm for him that he scarcely could resist To see Laura again after having parted as he thought for so many years delighted him in anticipation and it would manifest his real interest in his young cousins and show that he was superior to taking offence at the folly of Charles or his father
These were his first thoughts and inclinations his second were that it was contrary to his principles to sanction so foolish and hasty a marriage by his presence that he should thus be affording a triumph to Guy and to one who would use it less moderately—to Charles It would be more worthy of himself more consistent with his whole course of conduct to refuse his presence instead of going amongst them when they were all infatuated and unable to listen to sober counsel If he stayed away now when Guy should have justified his opinion they would all own how wisely he had acted and would see the true dignity which had refused unlike common minds to let his complaisance draw him into giving any sanction to what he so strongly disapproved Laura too would pass through this trying time better if she was not distracted by watching him she would understand the cause of his absence and he could trust her to love and comprehend him at a distance better than he could trust her to hear the marriageservice in his presence without betraying herself Nor did he wish to hear her again plead for the confession of their engagement and supposing any misadventure should lead to its betrayal what could be more unpleasant than for it to be revealed at such a time when Charles would so turn it against him that all his influence and usefulness would be for ever at an end
Love drew him one way and consistency another Captain Morville had never been so much in the condition of Mahomets coffin in his life and he grew more angry with his uncle Charles and Guy for having put him in so unpleasant a predicament So the self-debate lasted all the way to Kilcoran and he only had two comforts—one that he had sent the follower who was always amenable to good advice safe out of the way of Lady Eveleen to spend his leave of absence at Thorndale—the other that Maurice de Courcy was as yet ignorant of the Hollywell news and did not torment him by talking about it
This satisfaction however lasted no longer than till their arrival at Kilcoran for the instant they entered the drawingroom Lady Eveleen exclaimed O Maurice I have been so longing for you to come Captain Morville I hope you have not told him for I cant flatter myself to be beforehand with you now at least
He has told me nothing said Maurice indeed such bad company has seldom been seen as he has been all the way
You dont mean that you dont know it How delightful O mamma think of knowing something Captain Morville does not
I am afraid I cannot flatter you so far said Philip knowing this was no place for allowing his real opinion to be guessed
Then you do know said Lady Kilcoran sleepily I am sure it is a subject of great rejoicing
But what is it Eva Make haste and tell said Maurice
No you must guess
Why you would not be in such a way about it if it was not a wedding
Right Maurice now who is it
One of the Edmonstones I suppose Tis Laura
Wrong
What not Laura I thought she would have been off first Somebodys got no taste then for Laura is the prettiest girl I know
Ah your heart has escaped breaking this time Maurice It is that little puss Amy that has made a great conquest Now guess
Oh young Morville of course But what possessed him to take Amy and leave Laura
Perhaps Laura was not to be had Men are so selfsufficient that they always think they may pick and choose Is it not so Captain Morville I like Sir Guy better than most men but Laura is too good for any one I know If I could make a perfect hero I would at once only Charles would tell me all the perfect heroes in books are bores How long have you known of it Captain Morville
For the last ten days
And you never mentioned it
I did not know whether they intended to publish it
Now Captain Morville I hope to make some progress in your good opinion Of course you believe I cant keep a secret but what do you think of my having known it ever since last summer and held my tongue all that time
A great effort indeed said Philip smiling It would have been greater I suppose if the engagement had been positive not conditional
Oh every one knew what it must come to No one could have the least fear of Sir Guy Yes I saw it all I gave my little aid and I am sure I have a right to be bridesmaid as I am to be Oh wont it be charming It is to be the grandest wedding that ever was seen It is to be on WhitTuesday and papa is going to take me and Aunt Charlotte for old Aunt Mabel says Aunt Charlotte must go There are to be six bridesmaids and a great party at the breakfast everything as splendid as possible and I made Mrs Edmonstone promise from the first that we should have a ball You must go Maurice
I shall be on the high seas
Oh yes that is horrid But you dont sail with the regiment I think Captain Morville You surely go
I am not certain said Philip especially disgusted by hearing of the splendour and thinking that he had supposed Guy would have had more sense and it showed how silly Amy really was since she was evidently only anxious to enjoy the full paraphernalia of a bride
Not certain exclaimed Maurice and Eveleen in a breath
I am not sure that I shall have time You know I have been intending to make a walking tour through Switzerland before joining at Corfu
And you really would prefer going by yourself—apart unfriended melancholy slow
Very slow indeed said Maurice
A wedding is a confused melancholy affair said Philip You know I am no dancing man Lady Eveleen one individual like myself can make little difference to persons engrossed with their own affairs I can wish my cousins well from a distance as well as at hand and though they have been kind enough to ask me I think that while their house is overflowing with guests of more mark my room will be preferred to my company
Then you do not mean to go said Lady Kilcoran I do not she continued for my health is never equal to so much excitement and it would only be giving poor Mrs Edmonstone additional trouble to have to attend to me
So you really mean to stay away said Eveleen
I have not entirely decided
At any rate you must go and tell old Aunt Mabel all about them said Eveleen She is so delighted You will be quite worshipped at the cottage for the very name of Morville I spend whole hours in discoursing on Sir Guys perfections
Philip could not refuse but his feelings towards Guy were not warmed by the work he had to go through when conducted to the cottage where lived old Lady Mabel Edmonstone and her daughter and there required to dilate on Guys excellence He was not wanted to speak of any of the points where his conscience would not let him give a favourable report it was quite enough for him to tell of Guys agreeable manners and musical talents and to describe the beauty and extent of Redclyffe Lady Mabel and Miss Edmonstone were transported and the more Philip saw of the light and superficial way in which the marriage was considered the more unwilling he became to confound himself with such people by eagerness to be present at it and to join in the festivities Yet he exercised great forbearance in not allowing one word of his disapproval or misgivings to escape him no censure was uttered and Lady Eveleen herself could not make out whether he rejoiced or not He was grave and philosophical superior to nonsensical mirth that was all that she saw and he made himself very agreeable throughout his visit by taking condescending interest in all that was going on and especially to Lady Eveleen by showing that he thought her worthy of rational converse
He made himself useful as usual Lord Kilcoran wanted a tutor for his two youngest boys and it had been proposed to send them to Mr Wellwood at his curacy at Coombe Prior He wished to know what Captain Morville thought of the plan and Philip thinking that Mr Wellwood had been very inattentive to Guys proceedings at St Mildreds though he would not blame him considered it very fortunate that he had a different plan to recommend One of the officers of his regiment had lately had staying with him a brother who had just left Oxford and was looking out for a tutorship a very clever and agreeable young man whom he liked particularly and he strongly advised Lord Kilcoran to keep his sons under his own eye and place them under the care of this gentleman His advice especially when enforced by his presence was almost sure to prevail and thus it was in the present case
The upshot of his visit was that he thought worse and worse of the sense of the whole Edmonstone connection—considered that it would be of no use for him to go to Hollywell—adhered to his second resolution and wrote to his uncle a calm and lofty letter free from all token of offence expressing every wish for the happiness of Guy and Amabel and thanking his uncle for the invitation which however he thought it best to decline much as he regretted losing the opportunity of seeing Hollywell and its inhabitants again His regiment would sail for Corfu either in May or June but he intended himself to travel on foot through Germany and Italy and would write again before quitting Ireland
So said Charles there were at the marriage the Picanninies and the Joblillies and the Garryulies but not the grand Panjandrum himself
Nor the little round button at top rejoined Charlotte
Well its his own look out said Mr Edmonstone It is of a piece with all the rest
I am sure we dont want him said Charlotte
Not in this humour said her mother
Amy said nothing and if she did not allow herself to avow that his absence was a relief it was because she saw it was a grief and disappointment to Guy
Laura was of course very much mortified—almost beyond the power of concealment She thought he would have come for the sake of seeing her and she had reckoned so much on this meeting that it was double vexation He did not know what he was missing by not coming and she could not inform him for writing to him was impossible without the underhand dealings to which they would never either of them have recourse So much for herself and his perseverance in disapproval in spite of renewed explanation made her more anxious and sorry on Amys account Very mournful were poor Lauras sensations but there was no remedy but to try to bewilder and drive them away in the bustle of preparation
Guy had to go and take his degree and then return to make his own preparations at Redclyffe Amy begged him as she knew he would like to leave things alone as much as possible for she could not bear old places to be pulled to pieces to suit newcomers and she should like to find it just as he had been used to it
He smiled and said It should only be made habitable She must have a morningroom about which he would consult Mrs Ashford and he would choose her piano himself The great drawingroom had never been unpacked since his grandmothers time so that must be in repair and as for a garden they would lay it out together There could not be much done for though they did not talk of it publicly lest they should shock Mr Edmonstone they meant to go home directly after their marriage
To Oxford then went Guy his second letter announced that he had done tolerably well on his examination and it came round to the Edmonstones that it was a great pity he had not gone up for honours as he would certainly have distinguished himself
Redclyffe was of course in a state of great excitement at the news that Sir Guy was going to be married Markham was very grand with the letter that announced it and could find nothing to grumble about but that the lad was very young and it was lucky it was no worse
Mrs Ashford was glad it was so good a connection and obtained all the intelligence she could from James Thorndale who spoke warmly of the Hollywell family in general and in particular said that the young ladies looked after schools and poor people—that Miss Edmonstone was very handsome and clever—a very superior person but as to Miss Amabel he did not know that there was anything to say about her She was just like other young ladies and very attentive to her invalid brother
Markhams enmity to Mr Ashford had subsided at the bidding of his master and he informed him one day with great cordiality that Sir Guy would be at home the next He was to sleep that night at Coombe Prior and ride to Redclyffe in the morning and to the great delight of the boys it was at the parsonage door that he dismounted
Mrs Ashford looked up in his bright face and saw no more of the shade that had perplexed her last winter His cheeks were deeper red as she warmly shook hands with him and then the children sprung upon him for their old games—the boys claiming his promise with all their might to take them out to the Shag She wondered when she should venture to talk to him about Miss Amabel He next went to find Markham and met him before he reached his house Markham was too happy not to grant and grumble more than ever
Well Sir Guy so here you are Youve lost no time about it however A fine pair of young housekeepers and a pretty example of early marriages for the parish
Guy laughed You must come and see the example Markham I have a message from Mr and Mrs Edmonstone to ask you to come to Hollywell at Whitsuntide
Grunt You are making a fool of me Sir Guy Whats a plain old man like me to do among all your lords and ladies and finery and flummery Ill do no such thing
Not to oblige me
Oblige you Nonsense Much youll care for me
Nay Markham you must not stay away You my oldest and best friend—my only home friend I owe all my present happiness to you and it would really be a great disappointment to me if you did not come She wishes it too
Well Sir Guy and the grunt was of softer tone if you do choose to make a fool of me I cant help it You must have your own way though you might have found a friend that would do you more credit
Then I may say that you will come
Say I am very much obliged to Mr and Mrs Edmonstone for their invitation It is very handsome of them
Then you will have the settlements ready by that time You must Markham
Ill see about it
And the house must be ready to come home to at once
You dont know what you are talking of Sir Guy exclaimed Markham at once aghast and angry
Yes I do We dont intend to turn the house upside down with new furniture
You may talk as you please Sir Guy but I know whats what and it is mere nonsense to talk of bringing a lady to a house in this condition A pretty notion you have of what is fit for your bride I hope she knows what sort of care you mean to take of her
She will be satisfied said Guy She particularly wishes not to have everything disarranged I only must have two rooms furnished for her
But the place wants painting from head to foot and the roof is in such a state—
The roof Thats serious
Serious I believe so Youll have it about your ears in no time if you dont look sharp
Ill look this minute said Guy jumping up Will you come with me
Up he went climbing about in the forest of ancient timbers where he could not but be convinced that there was more reason than he could wish in what Markham said and that his roof was in no condition to bring his bride to Indeed it was probable that it had never been thoroughly repaired since the time of old Sir Hugh for the Morvilles had not been wont to lay out money on what did not make a display Guy was in dismay he sent for the builder from Moorworth calculated times and costs but do what he would he could not persuade himself that when once the workmen were in Redclyffe they would be out again before the autumn
Guy was very busy during the fortnight he spent at home There were the builder and his plans and Markham and the marriage settlements and there were orders to be given about the furniture He came to Mrs Ashford about this conducted her to the park and begged her to be so kind as to be his counsellor and to superintend the arrangement He showed her what was to be Amys morningroom—now bare and empty but with the advantages of a window looking south upon the green wooded slope of the park with a view of the church tower and of the moors which were of very fine form He owned himself to be profoundly ignorant about upholstery matters and his ideas of furniture seemed to consist in prints for the walls a piano a bookcase and a couch for Charles
You have heard about Charles said he raising his bright face from the list of needful articles which he was writing using the windowseat as a table
Not much said Mrs Ashford Is he entirely confined to the sofa
He cannot move without crutches but no one could guess what he is without seeing him He is so patient his spirits never flag and it is beautiful to see how considerate he is and what interest he takes in all the things he never can share poor fellow I dont know what Hollywell would be without Charlie I wonder how soon he will be able to come here Hardly this year I am afraid for things must be comfortable for him and I shall never get them so without Amy and then it will be autumn Well what next Oh you said windowcurtains Some blue sort of stuff I suppose like the drawingroom ones at Hollywell Whats the name of it
In fact Mrs Ashford was much of his opinion that he never would make things comfortable without Amy though he gave his best attention to the inquiries that were continually made of him and where he had an idea carried it out to the utmost He knew much better what he was about in the arrangements for Coombe Prior where he had installed his friend Mr Wellwood and set on foot many plans for improvements giving them as much attention as if he had nothing else to occupy his mind Both the curate and Markham were surprised that he did not leave these details till his return home but he answered—
Better do things while we may The thought of this unhappy place is enough to poison everything and I dont think I could rest without knowing that the utmost was being done for it
He was very happy making arrangements for a village feast on the weddingday The Ashfords asked if he would not put it off till his return and preside himself
It wont hurt them to have one first Let them make sure of all the fun they can he answered and the sentiment was greatly applauded by Edward and Robert who followed him about more than ever and grew so fond of him that it made them very angry to be reminded of the spirit of defiance in which their acquaintance had begun Nevertheless they seemed to be preparing the same spirit for his wife for when their mother told them they must not expect to monopolize him thus when he was married they declared that they did not want a Lady Morville at all and could not think why he was so stupid as to want a wife
Their father predicted that he would never have time to fulfil his old engagement of taking them out to the Shag Rock but the prediction was not verified for he rowed both them and Mr Ashford thither one fine May afternoon showed them all they wanted to see and let them scramble to their hearts content He laughed at their hoard of scraps of the wood of the wreck which they said their mamma had desired them to fetch for her
So many avocations came upon Guy at once—so many of the neighbours came to call on him—such varieties of people wanted to speak to him—the boys followed him so constantly—and he had so many invitations from Mr Wellwood and the Ashfords that he never had any time for himself except what must be spent in writing to Amabel There was a feeling upon him that he must have time to commune with himself and rest from this turmoil of occupation in the solitude of which Redclyffe had hitherto been so full He wanted to be alone with his old home and take leave of it and of the feelings of his boyhood before beginning on this new era of his life but whenever he set out for a solitary walk before he could even get to the top of the crag either Markham marched up to talk over some important question—a farmer waylaid him to make some request—some cottager met him to tell of a grievance—Mr Wellwood rode over—or the Ashford boys rushed up and followed like his shadow
At length on Ascension day the last before he was to leave Redclyffe with a determination that he would escape for once from his pursuers he walked to the Cove as soon as he returned from morning service launched his little boat and pushed off into the rippling whispering waters It was a resumption of the ways of his boyhood it seemed like a holiday to have left all these cares behind him just as it used to be when all his lessons were prepared and he had leave to disport himself by land or water the whole afternoon provided he did not go out beyond the Shag Rock He took up his sculls and rowed merrily singing and whistling to keep time with their dash the return to the old pleasure quite enough at first the salt breeze the dashing waves the motion of the boat So he went on till he had come as far as his former boundary then he turned and gazed back on the precipitous rocks cleft with deep fissures marbled with veins of different shades of red and tufted here and therewith clumps of samphire grass and a little brushwood bright with the early green of spring The white foam and spray were leaping against their base and roaring in their hollows the tract of wavelets between glittered in light or heaved green under the shadow of the passing clouds the seabirds floated smoothly in sweeping undulating lines
As though lifes only call and care
Were graceful motion
the hawks poised themselves high in air near the rocks The Cove lay in sunshine its rough stone chimneys and rude slate roofs overgrown with moss and fern rising rapidly one above the other in the fast descending hollow through which a little stream rushed to the sea—more quietly than its brother which at some space distant fell sheer down over the crag in a white line of foam brawling with a tone of its own, distinguishable among all the voices of the sea contending with the rocks Above the village in the space where the outline of two hills met and crossed rose the pinnacled tower of the village church the unusual height of which was explained by the old custom of lighting a beaconfire on its summit to serve as a guide to the boats at sea Still higher apparently on the very brow of the beetling crag that frowned above stood the old Gothic hall crumbling and lofty a fit eyrie for the eagles of Morville The sunshine was indeed full upon it but it served to show how many of the dark windows were without the lining of blinds and curtains that alone gives the look of life and habitation to a house How crumbled by seawind were the old walls and the aspect altogether full of a dreary haughtiness suiting with the whole of the stories connected with its name from the time when it was said the very dogs crouched and fled from the presence of the sacrilegious murderer of the Archbishop to the evening when the heir of the line lay stretched a corpse before his fathers gate
Guy sat resting on his oars gazing at the scene full of happiness yet with a sense that it might be too bright to last as if it scarcely befitted one like himself The bliss before him though it was surely a beam from heaven was so much above him that he hardly dared to believe it real like a child repeating Is it my own my very own and pausing before it will venture to grasp at a prize beyond its hopes He feared to trust himself fully lest it should carry him away from his selfdiscipline and dazzle him too much to let him keep his gaze on the light beyond and he rejoiced in this time of quiet to enable him to strive for power over his mind to prevent himself from losing in gladness the balance he had gained in adversity
It was such a check as he might have wished for to look at that grim old castle recollect who he was and think of the frail tenure of all earthly joy especially for one of the house of Morville Could that abode ever be a home for a creature like Amy with the bright innocent mirth that seemed too soft and sweet ever to be overshadowed by gloom and sorrow Perhaps she might be early taken from him in the undimmed beauty of her happiness and innocence and he might have to struggle through a long lonely life with only the remembrance of a shortlived joy to lighten it and when he reflected that this was only a melancholy fancy the answer came from within that there was nothing peculiar to him in the perception that earthly happiness was fleeting It was best that so it should be and that he should rest in the trust that brightened on him through all—that neither life nor death sorrow nor pain could separate for ever him and his Amy
And he looked up into the deep blue sky overhead murmuring to himself In heart and mind thither ascend and with Him continually dwell and gazed long and intently as he rocked on the green waters till he again spoke to himself—Why stand ye here gazing up into heaven then pulled vigorously back to the shore leaving a shining wake far behind him
CHAPTER 29
Hark how the birds do sing
And woods do ring
All creatures have their joy and man hath his
Yet if we rightly measure
Mans joy and pleasure
Rather hereafter than in present is
Not that he may not here
Taste of the cheer
But as birds drink and straight lift up the head
So must he sip and think
Of better drink
He may attain to after he is dead
—HERBERT
Guy returned to Hollywell on the Friday there to spend a quiet week with them all for it was a special delight to Amy that Hollywell and her family were as precious to him for their own sakes as for hers It was said that it was to be a quiet week—but with all the best efforts of Mrs Edmonstone and Laura to preserve quiet there was an amount of confusion that would have been very disturbing but for Amys propensity never to be ruffled or fluttered
What was to be done in the honeymoon was the question for consideration Guy and Amy would have liked to make a tour among the English cathedrals pay a visit at Hollywell and then go home and live in a corner of the house till the rest was ready for Amy could not see why she should take up so much more room than old Sir Guy and Guy declared he could not see that happiness was a reason for going pleasurehunting but Charles pronounced this very stupid and Mr Edmonstone thought a journey on the Continent was the only proper thing for them to do Mrs Edmonstone wished Amy to see a little of the world Amy was known to have always desired to see Switzerland it occurred to Guy that it would be a capital opportunity of taking Arnaud to see the relations he had been talking for the last twenty years of visiting and so they acquiesced for as Guy said when they talked it over together it did not seem to him to come under the denomination of pleasurehunting since they had not devised it for themselves they had no house to go to they should do Arnaud a service and perhaps they should meet Philip
That will not be pleasurehunting certainly said Amy then remembering that he could not bear to hear Philip underrated she added I mean unless you could convince him and then it would be more than pleasure
It would be my first of unattained wishes said Guy Then we will enjoy the journey
No fear on that score
And for fear we should get too much into the stream of enjoyment as people abroad forget homeduties let us stick to some fixed time for coming back
You said Redclyffe would be ready by Michaelmas
I have told the builder it must be So Amy as far as it depends on ourselves we are determined to be at home by Michaelmas
All seemed surprised to find the time for the wedding so near at hand Charless spirits began to flag Amy was a greater loss to him than to anybody else she could never again be to him what she had been and unable as he was to take part in the general bustle and occupation he had more time for feeling this much more than his mother and Laura who were employed all day He and Guy were exemplary in their civilities to each other in not engrossing Amy and one who had only known him three years ago when he was all exaction and selfishness could have hardly believed him to be the same person who was now only striving to avoid giving pain by showing how much it cost him to yield up his sister He could contrive to be merry but the difficulty was to be cheerful he could make them all laugh in spite of themselves but when alone with Amy or when hearing her devolve on her sisters the services she had been wont to perform for him it was almost more than he could endure but then he dreaded setting Amy off into one of her silent cryingfits for which the only remedy was the planning a grand visit to Redclyffe and talking overall the facilities of railroads and carriages
The last day had come and a long strange one it was not exactly joyful to any and very sad to some though Amy with her sweet pensive face seemed to have a serenity of her own that soothed them whenever they looked at her Charlotte though inclined to be wild and flighty was checked and subdued in her presence Laura could not be entirely wretched about her Charles lay and looked at her without speaking her father never met her without kissing her on each side of her face and calling her his little jewel her mother—but who could describe Mrs Edmonstone on that day so full of the present pain contending with the unselfish gladness
Guy kept out of the way thinking Amy ought to be left to them He sat in his own room a good while afterwards rode to Broadstone in coming home made a long visit to Mr Ross and when he returned he found Charles in his wheeled chair on the lawn with Amy sitting on the grass by his side He sat down by her and there followed a long silence—one of those pauses full of meaning
When shall we three meet again at length said Charles in a wouldbe lively tone
And where said Amy
Here said Charles you will come here to tell your adventures and take up Bustle
I hope so said Guy We could not help it The telling you about it will be a treat to look forward to all the time
Yes your sightseeing is a public benefit You have seen many a thing for me
That is the pleasure of seeing and hearing the thing that is not fleeting said Guy
The unselfish part you mean said Charles and mused again till Guy starting up exclaimed—
There are the people as a carriage came in view in the lane Shall I wheel you home Charlie
Yes do
Guy leant over the back and pushed him along and as he did so murmured in a low tremulous tone Wherever or whenever we may be destined to meet Charlie or if never again I must thank you for a great part of my happiness here—for a great deal of kindness and sympathy
Charles looked straight before him and answered—The kindness was all on your part I had nothing to give in return but illtemper and exactions But Guy you must not think I have not felt all you have done for me You have made a new man of me instead of a wretched stick laughing at my misery to persuade myself and others that I did not feel it I hope you are proud of it
As if I had anything to do with it
Hadnt you thats all I know what you wont deny at any rate—what a capital manofallwork you have been to me when I had no right to ask it as now we have he added smiling because Amy was looking at him but not making a very successful matter of the smile When you come back youll see me treat you as indeed a man and a brother
This talk retarded them a little and they did not reach the house till the guests were arriving The first sight that met the eyes of Aunt Charlotte and Lady Eveleen as they entered was in the frame of the open window Guys light agile figure assisting Charles up the step his brilliant hazel eyes and glowing healthy complexion contrasting with Charless pale fair delicate face and features sharpened and refined by suffering Amy her deep blushes and downcast eyes almost hidden by her glossy curls stood just behind carrying her brothers crutch
There they are cried Miss Edmonstone springing forward from her brother and his wife and throwing her arms round Amy in a warm embrace My dear dear little niece I congratulate you with all my heart and that I do
Ill spare your hot cheeks Amy dearest whispered Eveleen as Amy passed to her embrace while Aunt Charlotte hastily kissed Charles and proceeded—I dont wait for an introduction and vehemently shook hands with Guy
Ay did I say a word too much in his praise said Mr Edmonstone Isnt he all out as fine a fellow as I told you
Guy was glad to turn away to shake hands with Lord Kilcoran and the next moment he drew Amy out of the group eagerly talking round Charless sofa and holding her hand led her up to a sturdy ruddybrown elderly man who had come in at the same time but after the first reception had no share in the family greetings You know him already said Guy and Amy held out her hand saying—
Yes I am sure I do
Markham was taken by surprise he gave a most satisfied grunt and shook hands as heartily as if she had been his favourite niece
And the little girl said Amy
O yes—I picked her up at St Mildreds one of the servants took charge of her in the hall
Ill fetch her cried Charlotte as Amy was turning to the door and the next moment she led in little Marianne Dixon clinging to her hand Amy kissed her and held her fast in her arms and Marianne looked up consoled in her bewilderment by the greeting of her dear old friend Sir Guy
Mr Edmonstone patted her head and when the others had spoken kindly to her Charlotte under whose especial charge Guy and Amy had placed her carried her off to the regions upstairs
The rest of the evening was hurry and confusion Mrs Edmonstone was very busy and glad to be so as she must otherwise have given way and there was Aunt Charlotte to be talked to whom they had not seen since Charless illness She was a short bustling active person with a joyous face inexhaustible goodhumour a considerable touch of Irish and referring everything to her mother—her one thought Everything was to be told to her and the only drawback to her complete pleasure was the anxiety lest she should be missed at home
Mrs Edmonstone was occupied with her telling her the history of the engagement and praising Guy Amy went up as soon as dinner was over to take leave of old nurse and to see little Marianne and Eveleen sat between Laura and Charlotte asking many eager questions which were not all convenient to answer
Why Sir Guy had not been at home at Christmas was a query to which it seemed as if she should never gain a reply for that Charles had been ill and Guy at Redclyffe was no real answer and finding she should not be told she wisely held her tongue Again she made an awkward inquiry—
Now tell me is Captain Morville pleased about this or not
Laura would have been silent trusting to Eveleens propensity for talking for bringing her to some speech that it might be easier to answer but Charlotte exclaimed What has he been saying about it
Saying O nothing But why does not he come
You have seen him more lately than we have said Laura
That is an evasion said Eveleen as if you did not know more of his mind than I could ever get at if I saw him every day of my life
He is provoking that is all answered Charlotte I am sure we dont want him but Laura and Guy will both of them take his part
A call came at that moment—the box of white gloves was come and Laura must come and count them She would fain have taken Charlotte with her but neither Charlotte nor Eveleen appeared disposed to move and she was obliged to leave them Eva had already guessed that there was more chance of hearing the facts from Charlotte and presently she knew a good deal Charlotte had some prudence but she thought she might tell her own cousin what half the neighbourhood knew—that Philip had suspected Guy falsely and had made papa very angry with him that the engagement had been broken off and Guy had been banished while all the time he was behaving most gloriously Now it was all explained but in spite of the fullest certainty Philip would not be convinced and wanted them to have waited five years
Eveleen agreed with Charlotte that this was a great deal too bad admired Guy and pitied Amy to her hearts content
So he was banished regularly banished said she However of course Amy never gave him up
Oh she never mistrusted him one minute
And while he had her fast it was little he would care for the rest
Yes if he had known it but she could not tell him
Eveleen looked arch
But I am sure she did not said Charlotte rather angrily
You know nothing about it my dear
Yes but I do for mamma said to Charlie how beautifully she did behave and he too—never attempting any intercourse
Very good of you to believe it
I am sure of it certain sure said Charlotte How could you venture to think they would either of them do anything wrong
I did not say they would
What not to write to each other when papa had forbidden it and do it in secret too
My dear dont look so innocently irate Goodness has nothing to do with it it would be only a moderate constancy You know nothing at all of lovers
If I know nothing of lovers I know a great deal of Amy and Guy and I am quite sure that nothing on earth would tempt them to do anything in secret that they were forbidden
Wait till you are in love and youll change your mind
I never mean to be in love said Charlotte indignantly Eveleen laughed the more Charlotte grew more angry and uncomfortable at the tone of the conversation and was heartily glad that it was broken off by the entrance of the gentlemen Guy helped Charles to the sofa and then turned away to continue his endless talk on Redclyffe business with Markham Charlotte flew up to the sofa seized an interval when no one was in hearing and kneeling down to bring her face on a level with her brothers whispered—Charlie Eva wont believe but that Guy and Amy kept up some intercourse last winter
I cant help it Charlotte
When I tell her they did not she only laughs at me Do tell her they did not
I have too much selfrespect to lay myself open to ridicule
Charlie you dont think it possible yourself exclaimed Charlotte in consternation
Possible—no indeed
She will say it is not wrong and that I know nothing of lovers
You should have told her that ours are not commonplace lovers but far beyond her small experience
I wish I had Tell her so Charlie she will believe you
I shant say one word about it
Why not
Because she is not worthy If she cant appreciate them I would let her alone I once thought better of Eva but it is very bad company she keeps when she is not here
Charles however was not sorry when Eveleen came to sit by him for a bantering conversation with her was the occupation of which he was moat capable Amy returning came and sat in her old place beside him with her hand in his and her quiet eyes fixed on the ground
The last evening for many weeks that she would thus sit with him—the last that she would ever be a part of his home She had already ceased to belong entirely to him she who had always been the most precious to him except his mother
Only his mother could have been a greater loss—he could not dwell on the anticipation and still holding her hand he roused himself to listen and answer gaily to Eveleens description of the tutor Mr Fielder a thorough gentleman very clever and agreeable who had read all the books in the world the ugliest yes without exaggeration the most quaintly ugly man living—little and looking just as if he was made of gutta percha Eveleen said always moving by jerks—so Maurice advised the boys not to put him near the fire lest he should melt
Only when he gives them some formidable lesson and they want to melt his heart said Charles talking at random in hopes of saying something laughable
Then his eyes—tis not exactly a squint but a cast there is and one set of eyelashes are black and the other light and that gives him just the air of a little frightful terrier of Maurices named Venus with a black spot over one eye The boys never call him anything but Venus
And you encourage them in respect for their tutor
Oh he holds his own at lessons I trow but he pretends to have such a horror of us wild Irish and to wonder not to find us eating potatoes with our fingers and that I dont wear a petticoat over my head instead of a bonnet in what he calls the classical Carthaginian CeltoHibernian fashion
Dear me said Charlotte no wonder Philip recommended him
O I assure you he has the gift no one else but Captain Morville talks near as well
So talked on Eveleen and Charles answered her as much in her own fashion as he could and when at last the evening came to an end every one felt relieved
Laura lingered long in Amys room perceiving that hitherto she had known only half the value of her sister her sweet sister It would be worse than ever now when left with the others all so much less sympathizing all saying sharp things of Philip none to cling to her with those winsome ways that had been unnoted till the time when they were no more to console her and she felt them to have been the only charm that had softened her late dreary desolation
So full was her heart that she must have told Amy all her grief but for the part that Philip had acted towards Guy and her doubts of Guy would not allow her the consolation of dwelling on Amys happiness which cheered the rest She could only hang about her in speechless grief and caress her fondly while Amy cried and tried to comfort her till her mother came to wish her good night
Mrs Edmonstone did not stay long because she wished Amy if possible to rest
Mamma said Amy as she received her last kiss I cant think why I am not more unhappy
It is all as it should be said Mrs Edmonstone
Amabel slept and awakened to the knowledge that it was her weddingday She was not to appear at the first breakfast but she came to meet Charles in the dressingroom and as they sat together on the sofa where she had watched and amused so many of his hours of helplessness he clasped round her arm his gift—a bracelet of his mothers hair His fingers trembled and his eyes were hazy but he would not let her help him Her thanks were obliged to be all kisses no words would come but Charlie Charlie how could I ever have promised to leave you
Nonsense who ever dreamt that my sisters were to be three monkeys tied to a dog
It was impossible not to smile though it was but for a moment—Charless mirth was melancholy
And dear Charlie you will not miss me so very much do pray let Charlotte wait upon you
After the first perhaps I may not hate her Oh Amy I little knew what I was doing when I tried to get him back again for you I was sawing off the bough I was sitting on But there I will not flatter you youve had enough to turn that head of yours Stand up and let me take a survey Very pretty I declare—you do my education credit There if it will be for your peace Ill do my best to wear on without you Ive wanted a brother all my life and you are giving me the very one I would have picked out of a thousand—the only one I could forgive for presuming to steal you Amy Here he is Come in he added as Guy knocked at his door to offer to help him downstairs
Guy hardly spoke and Amy could not look in his face It was late and he took down Charles at once After this she had very little quiet every one was buzzing about her and putting the last touches to her dress at last just as she was quite finished Charlotte exclaimed Oh there is Guys step may I call him in to have one look
Mrs Edmonstone did not say no and Charlotte opening the dressingroom door called to him He stood opposite to Amy for some moments then said with a smile I was wrong about the grogram I would not for anything see you look otherwise than you do
It seemed to Mrs Edmonstone and Laura that these words made them lose sight of the details of lace and silk that had been occupying them so that they only saw the radiance purity and innocence of Amys bridal appearance No more was said for Mr Edmonstone ran up to call Guy who was to drive Charles in the ponycarriage
Amabel of course went with her parents Poor child her tears flowed freely on the way and Mr Edmonstone now that it had really come to the point of parting with his little Amy was very much overcome while his wife hardly refraining from tears could only hold her daughters hand very close
The regular morning service was a great comfort by restoring their tranquillity and by the time it was ended Amabels countenance had settled into its own calm expression of trust and serenity She scarcely even trembled when her father led her forward her hand did not shake and her voice though very low was firm and audible while Guys deep sweet tones had a sort of thrill and quiver of intense feeling
No one could help observing that Laura was the most agitated person present she trembled so much that she was obliged to lean on Charlotte and her tears gave the infection to the other bridesmaids—all but Mary Ross who could never cry when other people did and little Marianne who did nothing but look and wonder
Mary was feeling a great deal both of compassion for the bereaved family and of affectionate admiring joy for the young pair who knelt before the altar It was a showery day with gleams of vivid sunshine and one of these suddenly broke forth casting a stream of colour from a martyrs figure in the south window so as to shed a golden glory on the wave of brown hair over Guys forehead then passing on and tinting the brides white veil with a deep glowing shade of crimson and purple
Either that golden light or the expression of the face on which it beamed made Mary think of the lines—
Where is the brow to wear in mortals sight
The crown of pure angelic light
Charles stood with his head leaning against a pillar as if he could not bear to look up Mr Edmonstone was restless and almost sobbing Mrs Edmonstone alone collected though much flushed and somewhat trembling while the only person apparently free from excitement was the little bride as there she knelt her hand clasped in his her head bent down her modest steadfast face looking as if she was only conscious of the vow she exchanged the blessing she received and was as it were lifted out of herself
It was over now The feast in its fullest sense was held and the richest of blessings had been called down on them
The procession came out of the vestry in full order and very pretty it was the bride and bridegroom in the fresh bright graciousness of their extreme youth and the six bridesmaids following Laura and Lady Eveleen two strikingly handsome and elegant girls Charlotte with the pretty little fair Marianne Mary Ross and Grace Harper The village people who stood round might well say that such a sight as that was worth coming twenty miles to see
The first care after the bridal pair had driven off was to put Charles into his ponycarriage Charlotte who had just pinned on his favour begged to drive him for she meant to make him her especial charge and to succeed to all Amys rights Mrs Edmonstone asked whether Laura would not prefer going with him but she hastily answered
No thank you let Charlotte for with her troubled feelings she could better answer talking girls than parry the remarks of her shrewd observant brother
Some one said it would rain but Charlotte still pleaded earnestly
Come then puss said Charles rallying his spirits only dont upset me or it will spoil their tour
Charlotte drove off with elaborate care—then came a deep sigh and she exclaimed Well he is our brother and all is safe
Yes said Charles no more fears for them
Had you any I am very glad if you had
Why
Because it was so like a book I had a sort of feeling all the time that Philip would come in quite grand and terrible
As if he must act Ogre I am not sure that I had not something of the same notion—that he might appear suddenly and forbid the banns entirely for Amys sake and as the greatest kindness to her
Oh
However he cant separate them now let him do his worst and while Amy is Guys wife I dont think we shall easily be made to quarrel I am glad the knot is tied for I had a fatality notion that the feud was so strong that it was nearly a case of the mountains bending and the streams ascending ere she was to be our foemans bride
No said Charlotte it ought to be like that story of Rosaura and her kindred dont you remember The fate would not be appeased by the marriage till Count Julius had saved the life of one of the hostile race That would be it—perhaps they will meet abroad and Guy will do it
That wont do Philip will never endanger his precious life nor ever forgive Guy the obligation Well I suppose there never was a prettier wedding—how silly of me to say so I shall be sick of hearing it before night
I do wish all these people were gone I did not know it would be so horrid I should like to shut myself up and cry and think what I could ever do to wait on you Indeed Charlie I know I never can be like Amy but if you—
Be anything but sentimental I dont want to make a fool of myself said Charles with a smile and tone as if he was keeping sorrow at bay Depend upon it if we were left to ourselves this evening we should be so desperately savage that we should quarrel furiously and there would be no Amy to set us to rights
How Aunt Charlotte did cry What a funny little woman she is
Yes I see now who you take after puss Youll be just like her when you are her age
So I mean to be—I mean to stay and take care of you all my life as she does of grandmamma
You do do you
Yes I never mean to marry it is so disagreeable O dear But how lovely dear Amy did look
Heres the rain exclaimed Charles as some large drops began to fall in good time to prevent them from being either savage or sentimental though at the expense of Charlottes pink and white for they had no umbrella and she would not accept a share of Charless carriagecloak She laughed and drove on fast through the short cut and arrived at the housedoor just as the pelting hail was over having battered her thin sleeves and made her white bonnet look very deplorable The first thing they saw was Guy with Bustle close to him for Bustle had found out that something was going on that concerned his master and followed him about more assiduously than ever as if sensible of the decree that he was to be left behind to Charlottes care
Charlotte how wet you are
Never mind Charlie is not She sprung out holding his hand and felt as if she could never forget that moment when her new brother first kissed her brow
Wheres Amy
Here and while Guy lifted Charles out Charlotte was clasped in her sisters arms
Are you wet Charlie
No Charlotte would not be wise and made me keep the cloak to myself
You are wet through poor child come up at once and change said Amy flying nimbly up the stairs—up even to Charlottes own room the old nursery and there she was unfastening the drenched finery
O Amy dont do all this Let me ring
No the servants are either not come home or are too busy Charles wont want me he has Guy Can I find your white frock
Oh but Amy—let me see Charlotte made prisoner the left hand and looked up with an arch smile at the face where she had called up a blush Lady Morville must not begin by being ladysmaid
Let me—let me Charlotte dear I shant be able to do anything for you this long time Amys voice trembled and Charlotte held her fast to kiss her again
We must make haste said Amy recovering herself There are the carriages
While the frock was being fastened Charlotte looked into the Prayerbook Amy had laid down There was the name Amabel Frances Morville and the date
Has he just written it said Charlotte
Yes when we came home
O Amy dear dear Amy I dont know whether I am glad or sorry
I believe I am both said Amy
At that moment Mrs Edmonstone and Laura hastened in Then was the time for broken words tears and smiles as Amy leant against her mother who locked her in a close embrace and gazed on her in a sort of trance at once of maternal pride and of pain at giving up her cherished nestling Poor Laura how bitter were her tears and how forced her smiles—far unlike the rest
No one would care to hear the details of the breakfast and the splendours of the cake how Charlotte recovered her spirits while distributing the favours and Lady Eveleen set up a flirtation with Markham and forced him into wearing one though he protested with many a grunt that she was making a queer fool of him how often Charles was obliged to hear it had been a pretty wedding and how well Lord Kilcoran made his speech proposing the health of Sir Guy and Lady Morville All the time Laura was active and useful—feeling as if she was acting a play sustaining the character of Miss Edmonstone the bridesmaid at her sisters happy marriage while the true Laura Philips Laura was lonely dejected wretched half fearing for her sister half jealous of her happiness forced into pageantry with an aching heart—with only one wish that it was over and that she might be again alone with her burden
She was glad when her mother rose and the ladies moved into the drawingroom—glad to escape from Eveleens quick eye and to avoid Marys clear sense—glad to talk to comparative strangers—glad of the occupation of going to prepare Amabel for her journey This lasted a long time—there was so much to be said and hearts were so full and Amy over again explained to Charlotte how to perform all the little services to Charles which she relinquished while her mother had so many affectionate last words and every now and then stopped short to look at her little daughter saying she did not know if it was not a dream
At length Amabel was dressed in her purple and white shot silk her muslin mantle and white bonnet Mrs Edmonstone left her and Laura to have a few words together and went to the dressingroom There she found Guy leaning on the mantelshelf as he used to do when he brought his troubles to her He started as she entered
Ought I not to be here he said I could not help coming once more This room has always been the kernel of my home my happiness here
Indeed it has been a very great pleasure to have you here
You have been very kind to me he proceeded in a low reflecting tone You have helped me very much very often even when—Do you remember the day I begged you to keep me in order as if I were Charles I did not think then—
He was silent and Mrs Edmonstone little able to find words smiling tried to say—I little thought how truly and how gladly I should be able to call you my son and ended by giving him a mothers kiss
I wish I could tell you half said Guy—half what I feel for the kindness that made a home to one who had no right to any Coming as a stranger I found—
We found one to love with all our hearts said Mrs Edmonstone I have often looked back and seen that you brought a brightness to us all—especially to poor Charles Yes it dates from your coming and I can only wish and trust Guy that the same brightness will rest on your own home
There must be brightness where she is said Guy
I need not tell you to take care of her said Mrs Edmonstone smiling I think I can trust you but I feel rather as I did when first I sent her and Laura to a party of pleasure by themselves
Laura at this moment came in Alone with Amy she could not speak she could only cry and fearful of distressing her sister she came away but here with Guy it was worse for it was unkind not to speak one warm word to him Yet what could she say He spoke first—
Laura you must get up your looks again now this turmoil is over Dont do too much mathematics and wear yourself down to a shadow
Laura gave her sad forced smile
Will you do one thing for me Laura I should like to have one of your perspective views of the inside of the church Would it be too troublesome to do
Oh no I shall be very glad
Dont set about it till you quite like it and have plenty of time Thank you I shall think it is a proof that you can forgive me for all the pain I am causing you I am very sorry
You are so very kind said Laura bursting into tears and as her mother was gone she could not help adding but dont try to comfort me Guy dont blame yourself—tisnt only that—but I am so very very unhappy
Amy told me you were grieved for Philip I wish I could help it Laura I want to try to meet him in Switzerland and if we can perhaps it may be set right At any rate he will be glad to know you see the rights of it
Laura wept still more but she could never again lose the sisterly feeling those kind words had awakened If Philip had but known what he missed
Charlotte ran in Oh I am glad to find you here Guy I wanted to put you in mind of your promise You must write me the first letter you sign Your affectionate brother
I wont forget Charlotte
Guy Wheres Guy called Mr Edmonstone The rains going off You must come down both of you or youll be too late
Mrs Edmonstone hastened to call Amabel Those moments that she had been alone Amabel had been kneeling in an earnest supplication that all might be forgiven that she had done amiss in the home of her childhood that the blessings might be sealed on her and her husband and that she might go forth from her fathers house in strength sent from above Her mother summoned her she rose came calmly forth met Guy at the head of the stairs put her arm in his and they went down
Charles was on the sofa in the anteroom talking fast and striving for high spirits
Amy woman you do us credit Well write soon and dont break your heart for want of me
There was a confusion of goodbyes and then all came out to the hall door even Charles with Charlottes arm One more of those fastlocked embraces between the brother and sister and Mr Edmonstone put Amabel into the carriage
Goodbye goodbye my own dearest little one Bless you bless you and may you be as happy as a Mayflower Guy goodbye Ive given you the best I had to give—and tis you that are welcome to her Take care what you do with her for shes a precious little jewel Goodbye my boy
Guys face and grasping hand were the reply As he was about to spring into the carriage he turned again Charlotte I have shut Bustle up in my room Will you let him out in half an hour Ive explained it all to him and he will be very good Goodbye
Ill take care of him Ill mention him in every letter
And Markham mind if our house is not ready by Michaelmas we shall be obliged to come and stay with you
Grunt
Lastly as if he could not help it Guy dashed up the step once more pressed Charless hand and said God bless you Charlie
In an instant he was beside Amabel and they drove off—Amabel leaning forward and gazing wistfully at her mother and Charles till she was startled by a long cluster of laburnums their yellow bloom bent down and heavy with wet so that the ends dashed against her bonnet and the crystal drops fell on her lap
Why Amy the Hollywell flowers are weeping for the loss of you
She gave a sweet sunny smile through her tears At that moment they came beyond the thick embowering shrubs while full before them was the dark receding cloud on which the sunbeams were painting a widespanned rainbow The semicircle was perfect and full before them like an arch of triumph under which they were to pass
How beautiful broke from them both
Guy said the bride after a few minutes had faded the rainbow and turned them from its sight shall I tell you what I was thinking I was thinking that if there is a doom on us I am not afraid if it will only bring a rainbow
The rainbow will come after if not with it said Guy
CHAPTER 30
Shes a winsome wee thing
Shes a handsome wee thing
Shes a bonnie wee thing
This sweet wee wifie of mine
—BURNS
Look here Amy said Guy pointing to a name in the travellers book at Altdorf
Captain Morville she exclaimed July 14th That was only the day before yesterday
I wonder whether we shall overtake him Do you know what was this gentlemans route inquired Guy in French that was daily becoming more producible
The gentleman having come on foot with nothing but his knapsack had not made much sensation There was a vague idea that he had gone on to the St Gothard but the guide who was likely to know was not forthcoming and all Guys inquiries only resulted in I dare say we shall hear of him elsewhere
To tell the truth Amabel was not much disappointed and she could see though he said nothing that Guy was not very sorry These two months had been so very happy there had been such full enjoyment such freedom from care and vexation or aught that could for a moment ruffle the stream of delight Scenery cathedrals music paintings historical association had in turn given unceasing interest and pleasure and above all Amabel had been growing more and more into the depths of her husbands mind and entering into the grave noble thoughts inspired by the scenes they were visiting It had been a sort of ideal happiness so exquisite that she could hardly believe it real A taste of society which they had at Munich though very pleasant had only made them more glad to be alone together again any companion would have been an interruption and Philip so intimate yet with his carping persecuting spirit towards Guy was one of the last persons she could wish to meet but knowing that this was by no means a disposition Guy wished to encourage she held her peace
For the present no more was said about Philip and they proceeded to Interlachen where they spent a day or two while Arnaud was with his relations and they visited the two beautiful lakes of Thun and Brientz On first coming among mountains Amabel had been greatly afraid of the precipices and had been very much alarmed at the way in which Guy clambered about with a sureness of foot and steadiness of head acquired long ago on the crags of Redclyffe and on which the guides were always complimenting him but from seeing him always come down safe and from having been enticed by him to several heights which had at first seemed to her most dizzy and dangerous she had gradually laid aside her fears and even become slightly very slightly adventurous herself
One beautiful evening they were wandering on the side of the Beatenberg in the little narrow paths traced by the tread of the goats and their herdsmen Amabel sat down to try to sketch the outline of the whitecapped Jung Frau and her attendant mountains wishing she could draw as well as Laura but intending her outline to aid in describing the scene to those whose eyes she longed to have with her While she was drawing Guy began to climb higher and was soon out of sight though she still heard him whistling The mountains were not easy to draw or rather she grew discontented with her black lines and white paper compared with the dazzling snow against the blue sky tinged by the roseate tints of the setting sun and the dark fissures on the rocky sides still blacker from the contrast
She put up her sketching materials and began to gather some of the delightful treasury of mountain flowers A gentle slope of grass was close to her and on it grew at some little distance from her a tuft of deep purple the beautiful Alpine saxifrage which she well knew by description She went to gather it but the turf was slippery and when once descending she could not stop herself and what was the horror of finding herself half slipping half running down a slope which became steeper every moment till it was suddenly broken off into a sheer precipice She screamed and grasped with both hands at some low bushes that grew under a rock at the side of the treacherous turf She caught a branch and found herself supported by clinging to it with her hands while she rested on the slope now so nearly perpendicular that to lose her hold would send her instantly down the precipice Her whole weight seemed to depend on that slender bough and those little hands that clenched it convulsively—her feet felt in vain for some hold Guy Guy she shrieked again Oh where was he His whistle ceased—he heard her—he called
Here
Oh help me she answered But with that moments joy came the horror he could not help her—he would only fall himself Take care dont come on the grass she cried She must let go the branch in a short time then a slip the precipice—and what would become of him Those moments were hours
I am coming—hold fast She heard his voice above her very near To find him so close made the agony of dread and of prayer even more intense To be lost with her husband scarcely a step from her Yet how could he stand on the slippery turf and so as to be steady enough to raise her up
Now then he said speaking from the rock under which the brushwood grew I cannot reach you unless you raise up your hand to me—your left hand—straight up Let go Now
It was a fearful moment Amabel could not see him and felt as if relinquishing her grasp of the tree was certain destruction The instinct of self-preservation had been making her cling desperately with that left hand especially as it held by the thicker part of the bough But the habit of implicit confidence and obedience was stronger still she did not hesitate and tightening her hold with the other hand she unclasped the left and stretched it upwards
Joy unspeakable to feel his fingers close over her wrist like iron even while the bush to which she had trusted was detaching itself almost uprooted by her weight If she had waited a second she would have been lost but her confidence had been her safety A moment or two more and with closed eyes she was leaning against him his arm was round her and he guided her steps till breathless she found herself on the broad welltrodden path out of sight of the precipice
Thank heaven he said in a very low voice as he stood still Thank God my Amy I have you still
She looked up and saw how pale he was though his voice had been so steady throughout She leant on his breast and rested her head on his shoulder again in silence for her heart was too full of awe and thankfulness for words even had she not been without breath or power to speak and needing his support in her giddiness and trembling
More than a minute passed thus Then beginning to recover she looked up to him again and said Oh it was dreadful I did not think you could have saved me
I thought so too for a moment said Guy in a stifled voice You are better now You are not hurt are you sure
Quite sure I did not fall you know only slipped No I have nothing the matter with me thank you
She tried to stand alone but the trembling returned He made her sit down and she rested against him while he still made her assure him that she was unhurt Yes quite unhurt—quite well only this wrist is a little strained and no wonder Oh I am sure it was Providence that made those bushes grow just there
How did it happen
It was my fault I went after a flower my foot slipped on the turf and I could not stop myself I thought I should have run right down the precipice
She shut her eyes and shuddered again It was frightful he said holding her fast It was a great mercy indeed Thank heaven it is over You are not giddy now
Oh no not at all
And your wrist
Oh thats nothing I only told you to show you what was the worst said Amy smiling with recovered playfulness the most reassuring of all
What flower was it
A piece of purple saxifrage I thought there was no danger for it did not seem steep at first
No it was not your fault You had better not move just yet sit still a little while
O Guy where are you going
Only for your sketching tools and my stick I shall not be gone an instant Sit still and recover
In a few seconds he came back with her basket and in it a few of the flowers
Oh I am sorry she said coming to meet him I wish I had told you I did not care for them Why did you
I did not put myself in any peril about them I had my trusty staff you know
I am glad I did not guess what you were doing I thought it so impossible that I did not think of begging you not I shall keep them always It is a good thing for us to be put in mind how frail all our joy is
All asked Guy scarcely as if replying to her while though his arm pressed hers his eye was on the blue sky as he answered himself Your joy no man taketh from you
Amabel was much impressed as she thought what it would have been for him if his little wife bad been snatched from him so suddenly and frightfully His return—his meeting her mother—his desolate home and solitary life She could almost have wept for him Yet at the moment of relief from the fear of such misery he could thus speak He could look onward to the joy beyond even while his cheek was still blanched with the horror and anguish of the apprehension and how great they had been was shown by the broken words he uttered in his sleep for several nights afterwards while by day he was always watching and cautioning her Assuredly his dependence on the joy that could not be lost did not make her doubt his tenderness it only made her feel how far behind him she was for would it have been the same with her had the danger been his
In a couple of days they arrived at the beautiful Lugano and as usual their first walk was to the postoffice but disappointment awaited them There had been some letters addressed to the name of Morville but the Signor Inglese had left orders that such should be forwarded to Como Amabel in her best Italian strove hard to explain the difference between the captain and Sir Guy the Cavaliere Guido as she translated him who stood by looking much amused by the perplexities of his ladys construing while the postmaster though very polite and sorry for the Signoras disappointment stuck to the address being Morville poste restante
There is one good thing said the cavaliere as they walked away we can find the captain now Ill write and ask him—shall I say to meet us at Varenna or at Bellagio
Whichever suits him best I should think It cant make much difference to us
Your voice has a disconsolate cadence said Guy looking at her with a smile
I did not mean it she answered I have not a word to say against it It is quite right and I am sure I dont wish to do otherwise
Only it is the first drawback in our real daydream
Just so and that is all said Amy I am glad you feel the same not that I want you to change your mind
Dont you remember our resolution against mere pleasurehunting That adventure at Interlachen seemed to be meant to bring us up short just as we were getting into that line
You think we were
I was at least for I know it was a satisfaction not to find a letter to say Redclyffe was ready for us
I had rather it was Redclyffe than Philip
To be sure I would not change my own dancing leaping waves for this clear blue lookingglass of a lake or even those white peaks I want you to make friends with those waves Amy But it is a more real matter to make friends with Philip the one wish of my life Not that I exactly expect to clear matters up but if some move is not made now when it may we shall stand aloof for life and there will be the feud where it was before
It is quite right said Amy I dare say that meeting so far from home he will be glad to see us and to hear the Hollywell news I little thought last autumn where I should meet him again
On the second evening from that time Philip Morville was walking hot and dusty between the high stone walls bordering the road and shutting out the beautiful view of the lake at the entrance of Ballagio meditating on the note he had received from Guy and intending to be magnanimous and overlook former offences for Amabels sake He would show that he considered the marriage to have cleared off old scores and that as long as she was happy poor little thing her husband should be borne with though not to the extent of the spoiling the Edmonstones gave him
Thus reflecting he entered the town and walked on in search of the hotel He presently found himself on a terrace looking out on the deep blue lake there divided by the promontory of Bellagio into two branches the magnificent mountain forms rising opposite to him A little boat was crossing and as it neared the landingplace he saw that it contained a gentleman and lady English—probably his cousins themselves They looked up and in another moment had waved their recognition Gestures and faces were strangely familiar like a bit of Hollywell transplanted into that Italian scene He hastened to the landingplace and was met by a hearty greeting from Guy who seemed full of eagerness to claim their closer relationship and ready to be congratulated
How dye do Philip I am glad we have caught you at last Here she is
If he had wished to annoy Philip he could hardly have done so more effectually than by behaving as if nothing was amiss and disconcerting his preparations for a reconciliation But the captains ordinary manner was calculated to cover all such feelings and as he shook hands he felt much kindness for Amabel as an unconscious victim whose very smiles were melancholy and plenty of them there were for she rejoiced sincerely in the meeting as Guy was pleased and a home face was a welcome sight
I have your letters in my knapsack I will unpack them as soon as we get to the hotel I thought it safer not to send them in search of you again as we were to meet so soon
Certainly Are there many
One for each of you both from Hollywell I was very sorry to have engrossed them but not knowing you were so near I only gave my surname
It was lucky for us said Guy otherwise we could not have traced you We saw your name at Altdorf and have been trying to come up with you ever since
I am glad we have met What accounts have you from home
Excellent said Amy Charlie is uncommonly well he has been out of doors a great deal and has even dined out several times
I am very glad
You know he has been improving ever since his great illness
You would be surprised to see how much better he moves said Guy he helps himself so much more
Can he set his foot to the ground
No said Amy there is no hope of that but he is more active because his general health is improved he can sleep and eat more
I always thought exertion would do more for him than anything else
Amabel was vexed for she thought exertion depended more on health than health on exertion besides she thought Philip ought to take some blame to himself for the disaster on the stairs She made no answer and Guy asked what Philip had been doing today
Walking over the hills from Como Do you always travel in this fashion impedimentis relictis
Not exactly said Guy the impedimenta are some at Varenna some at the inn with Arnaud
So you have Arnaud with you
Yes and Anne Trower said Amy for her maid was a Stylehurst person who had lived at Hollywell ever since she had been fit for service She was greatly pleased to hear we were going to meet the captain
We amuse ourselves with thinking how she gets on with Arnaud said Guy Their introduction took place only two days before we were married since which they have had one continued teteatete which must have been droll at first
More so at last said Amy At first Anne thought Mr Arnaud so fine a gentleman that she hardly dared to speak to him I believe nothing awed her so much as his extreme courtesy but lately he has been quite fatherly to her and took her to dine at his sisters chalet where I would have given something to see her She tells me he wants her to admire the country but she does not like the snow and misses our beautiful cloverfields very much
Stylehurst ought to have been better training for mountains said Philip
They were fast losing the stiffness of first meeting Philip could not but acknowledge to himself that Amy was looking very well and so happy that Guy must be fulfilling the condition on which he was to be borne with However these were early days and of course Guy must be kind to her at least in the honeymoon before the wear and tear of life began They both looked so young that having advised them to wait four years he was ready to charge them with youthfulness if not as a fault at least as a folly indeed the state of his own affairs made him inclined to think it a foible almost a want of patience in any one to marry before thirty It was a conflict of feeling Guy was so cordial and goodhumoured that he could not help being almost gained but on the other hand he had always thought Guys manners eminently agreeable and as happiness always made people goodhumoured this was no reason for relying on him Besides the present ease and openness of manner might only result from security
Other circumstances combined more than the captain imagined in what is popularly called putting him out He had always been hitherto on equal terms with Guy indeed had rather the superiority at Hollywell from his age and assumption of character but here Sir Guy was somebody the captain nobody and even the advantage of age was lost now that Guy was married and head of a family while Philip was a stray young man and his guest Far above such considerations as he thought himself and deeming them only the tokens of the mammon worship of the time Philip nevertheless did not like to be secondary to one to whom he had always been preferred and this and perhaps the being half ashamed of it made him something more approaching to cross than ever before but now and then the persevering amiability of both would soften him and restore him to his most gracious mood
He gave them their letters when they reached the inn feeling as if he had a better right than they to one which was in Lauras writing and when left in solitary possession of the sittingroom—a very pleasant one with windows opening on the terrace just above the water—paced up and down chafing at his own perplexity of feeling
Presently they came back Guy sat down to continue their joint journallike letter to Charles while Amabel made an orderly arrangement of their properties making the most of their few books and taking out her work as if she had been at home Philip looked at the books
Have you a Childe Harold here said he I want to look at something in it
No we have not
Guy you never forget poetry I dare say you can help me out with those stanzas about the mists in the valley
I have never read it said Guy Dont you remember warning me against Byron
You did not think that was for life Besides he continued feeling this reply inconsistent with his contempt for Guys youth that applied to his perversions of human passions not to his descriptions of scenery
I think said Guy looking up from his letter I should be more unwilling to take a man like that to interpret nature than anything else except Scripture It is more profane to attempt it
I see what you mean said Amabel thoughtfully
More than I do said Philip I never supposed you would take my advice au pied de la lettre he had almost added perversely
I have felt my obligations for that caution ever since I have come to some knowledge of what Byron was said Guy
The fascination of his Giaour heroes has an evil influence on some minds said Philip I think you do well to avoid it The half truth resulting from its being the effect of self-contemplation makes it more dangerous
True said Guy though he little knew how much he owed to having attended to that caution for who could have told where the mastery might have been in the period of fearful conflict with his passions if he had been feeding his imagination with the contemplation of revenge dark hatred and malice and identifying himself with Byrons brooding and lowering heroes
But continued Philip I cannot see why you should shun the fine descriptions which are almost classical—the Bridge of Sighs the Gladiator
He may describe the gladiator as much as he pleases said Guy indeed there is something noble in that indignant line—
Butchered to make a Roman holiday
but that is not like his meddling with these mountains or the sea
Fine description is the point in both You are overdrawing
My notion is this said Guy—there is danger in listening to a man who is sure to misunderstand the voice of nature,—danger lest by filling our ears with the wrong voice we should close them to the true one I should think there was a great chance of being led to stop short at the material beauty or worse to link human passions with the glories of nature, and so distort defile profane them
You have never read the poem so you cannot judge said Philip thinking this extremely fanciful and ultrafastidious Your rule would exclude all descriptive poetry unless it was written by angels I suppose
No by men with minds in the right direction
Very little you would leave us
I dont think so said Amabel Almost all the poetry we really care about was written by such men
Shakspeare for instance
No one can doubt of the bent of his mind from the whole strain of his writings said Guy So again with Spenser and as to Milton though his religion was not quite the right sort no one can pretend to say he had it not Wordsworth Scott—
Scott said Philip
Including the descriptions of scenery in his novels said Amy where I am sure there is the spirit and the beauty
Or rather the spirit is the beauty said Guy
There is a good deal in what you say answered Philip who would not lay himself open to the accusation of being uncandid but you will forgive me for thinking it rather too deep an explanation of the grounds of not making Childe Harold a handbook for Italy like other people
Amabel thought this so dogged and provoking that she was out of patience but Guy only laughed and said Rather so considering that the fact was that we never thought of it
There were times when as Philip had once said good temper annoyed him more than anything and perhaps he was unconsciously disappointed at having lost his old power of fretting and irritating Guy and watching him champ the bit so as to justify his own opinion of him Every proceeding of his cousins seemed to give him annoyance more especially their being at home together and Guys seeming to belong more to Hollywell than himself He sat by with a book and watched them as Guy asked for Lauras letter and Amy came to look over his halffinished answer laughing over it and giving her commands and messages looking so full of playfulness and happiness as she stood with one hand on the back of her husbands chair and the other holding the letter and Guy watching her amused face and answering her remarks with lively words and bright smiles People who looked no deeper than the surface would say what a wellmatched pair thought Philip and no doubt they were very happy poor young things if it would but last Here Guy turned and asked him a question about the line of perpetual snow so much in his own style that he was almost ready to accuse them of laughing at him Next came what hurt him most of all as they talked over Charless letter and a few words passed about Laura and the admiration of some person she had met at Allonby The whole world was welcome to admire her nothing could injure his hold on her heart and no joke of Charles could shake his confidence but it was hard that he should be forced to hear such things and ask no questions for they evidently thought him occupied with his book and did not intend him to listen The next thing they said however obliged him to show that he was attending for it was about her being better
Who Laura he said in a tone that in spite of himself had a startled sound You did not say she had been ill
No she has not said Amy Dr Mayerne said there was nothing really the matter but she has been worried and out of spirits lately and mamma thought it would be good for her to go out more
Philip would not let himself sigh in spite of the oppressing consciousness of having brought the cloud over her and of his own inability to do aught but leave her to endure it in silence and patience Alas for how long Obliged meanwhile to see these young creatures placed by the mere factitious circumstance of wealth in possession of happiness which they had not had time either to earn or to appreciate He thought it shallow because of their mirth and gaiety as if they were only seeking food for laughter finding it in mistakes for which he was ready to despise them
Arnaud had brought rather antiquated notions to the renewal of his office as a courier his mind had hardly opened to railroads and steamers and changes had come over hotels since his time Guy and Amabel both young and healthy caring little about bad dinners and unwilling to tease the old man by complaints or alterations of his arrangements had troubled themselves little about the matter took things as they found them ate dry bread when the cookery was bad walked if the road was shocking went away the sooner if the inns were intolerable made merry over every inconvenience and turned it into an excellent story for Charles They did not even distress themselves about sights which they had missed seeing
Philip thought all this very foolish and absurd showing that they were unfit to take care of themselves and that Guy was neglectful of his wifes comforts in short establishing his original opinion of their youth and folly
So passed the first evening perhaps the worst because besides what he had heard about Laura he had been somewhat overfatigued by various hot days walks
Certain it is that next morning he was not nearly so much inclined to be displeased with them for laughing when in speaking to Anne he inadvertently called her mistress Miss Amabel
Never mind said Amy as Anne departed—and he looked disconcerted as a precise man always does when catching himself in a mistake—Anne is used to it Guy is always doing it and puzzles poor Arnaud sorely by sending him for Miss Amabels parasol
And the other day said Guy when Thorndales brother at Munich inquired after Lady Morville I had to consider who she was
Oh you saw Thorndales brother did you
Yes he was very obliging Guy had to go to him about our passports and when he found who we were he brought his wife to call on us and asked us to an evening party
Did you go
Guy thought we must and it was very entertaining We had a curious adventure there In the morning we had been looking at those beautiful windows of the great church when I turned round and saw a gentleman—an Englishman—gazing with all his might at Guy We met again in the evening and presently Mr Thorndale came and told us it was Mr Shene
Shene the painter
Yes He had been very much struck with Guys face it was exactly what he wanted for a picture he was about and he wished of all things just to be allowed to make a sketch
Did you submit
Yes said Guy and we were rewarded I never saw a more agreeable person or one who gave so entirely the impression of genius The next day he took us through the gallery and showed us all that was worth admiring
And in what character is he to make you appear
That is the strange part of it said Amabel Dont you remember how Guy once puzzled us by choosing Sir Galahad for his favourite hero It is that very Sir Galahad when he kneels to adore the Saint Greal
Mr Shene said he had long been dreaming over it and at last as he saw Guys face looking upwards it struck him that it was just what he wanted it would be worth anything to him to catch the expression
I wonder what I was looking like ejaculated Guy
Did he take you as yourself or as Sir Galahad
As myself happily
How did he succeed
Amy likes it but decidedly I should never have known myself
Ah said his wife—
Could some fay the giftie gie us
To see ourselves as others see us
As far as the sunburnt visage is concerned the glass does that every morning
Yes but you dont look at yourself exactly as you do at a painted window said Amy in her demure way
I cannot think how you found time for sitting said Philip
O it is quite a little thing a mere sketch done in two evenings and half an hour in the morning He promises it to me when he has done with Sir Galahad said Amy
Two—three evenings You must have been a long time at Munich
A fortnight said Guy there is a great deal to see there
Philip did not quite understand this nor did he think it very satisfactory that they should thus have lingered in a gay town but he meant to make the best of them today and returned to his usual fashion of patronizing and laying down the law They were so used to this that they did not care about it indeed they had reckoned on it as the most amiable conduct to be expected on his part
The day was chiefly spent in an excursion on the lake landing at the most beautiful spots walking a little way and admiring or while in the boat smoothly moving over the deep blue waters gaining lovely views of the banks and talking over the book with which their acquaintance had begun I Promessi Sposi Never did tourists spend a more serene and pleasant day
On comparing notes as to their plans it appeared that each party had about a week or ten days to spare the captain before he must embark for Corfu and Sir Guy and Lady Morville before the time they had fixed for returning home Guy proposed to go together somewhere spare the postoffice further blunders and get the Signor Capitano to be their interpreter Philip thought it would be an excellent thing for his young cousins for him to take charge of them and show them how people ought to travel so out came his little pocket map marked with his route before he left Ireland whereas they seemed to have no fixed object but to be always going somewhere It appeared that they had thought of Venice but were easily diverted from it by his design of coasting the eastern bank of the Lago di Como and so across the Stelvio into the Tyrol all together as far as Botzen whence Philip would turn southward by the mountain paths while they would proceed to Innsbruck on their return home
Amabel was especially pleased to stay a little longer on the banks of the lake and to trace out more of Lucias haunts and if she secretly thought it would have been pleasanter without a third person she was gratified to see how much Guys manner had softened Philips injustice and distrust making everything so smooth and satisfactory that at the end of the day she told her husband that she thought his experiment had not failed
She was making the breakfast the next morning when the captain came into the room and she told him Guy was gone to settle their plans with Arnaud After lingering a little by the window Philip turned and with more abruptness than was usual with him said—
You dont think there is any cause of anxiety about Laura
No certainly not said Amy surprised She has not been looking well lately but Dr Mayerne says it is nothing and you know—she blushed and looked down—there were many things to make this a trying time
Is she quite strong Can she do as much as usual
She does more than ever mamma is only afraid of her overworking herself but she never allows that she is tired She goes to school three days in the week besides walking to Easthill on Thursday to help in the singing and she is getting dreadfully learned Guy gave her his old mathematical books and Charlie always calls her Miss Parabola
Philip was silent knowing too well why she sought to stifle care in employment and feeling embittered against the whole world against her father against his own circumstances against the happiness of others nay perhaps against the Providence which had made him what he was
Presently Guy came in and the first thing he said was I am afraid we must give up our plan
How exclaimed both Philip and Amy
I have just heard that there is a fever at Sondrio and all that neighbourhood and every one says it would be very foolish to expose ourselves to it
What shall we do instead said Amy
I told Arnaud we would let him know in an hours time I thought of Venice
Venice oh yes delightful
What do you say Philip said Guy
I say that I cannot see any occasion for our being frightened out of our original determination If a fever prevails among the halfstarved peasantry it need not affect wellfed healthy persons merely passing through the country
You see we could hardly manage without sleeping there said Guy we must sleep either at Colico or at Madonna Now Colico they say is a most unhealthy place at this time of year and Madonna is the very heart of the fever—Sondrio not much better I dont see how it is to be safely done and though very likely we might not catch the fever I dont see any use in trying
That is making yourself a slave to the fear of infection
I dont know what purpose would be answered by running the risk said Guy
If you chose to give it so dignified a name as a risk said Philip
I dont then said Guy smiling I should not care if there was any reason for going there but as there is not I shall face Mr Edmonstone better if I dont run Amy into any more chances of mischief
Is Amy grateful for the care said Philip after all her wishes for the eastern bank
Amy is a good wife said Guy For Venice then Ill ring for Arnaud You will come with us wont you Philip
No I thank you I always intended to see the Valtelline and an epidemic among the peasantry does not seem to me to be sufficient to deter
O Philip you surely will not said Amy
My mind is made up Amy thank you
I wish you would be persuaded said Guy I should like particularly to have you to lionize us there and I dont fancy your running into danger
The argument lasted long Philip by no means approved of Venice especially after the long loitering at Munich thinking that in both places there was danger of Guys being led into mischief by his musical connections Therefore he did his best for Amabels sake to turn them from their purpose persuaded in his own mind that the fever was a mere bugbear raised up by Arnaud and perhaps in his full health and strength almost regarding illness itself as a foible far more the dread of it He argued therefore in his most provoking strain becoming more vexatious as the former annoyance was revived at finding the impossibility of making Guy swerve from his purpose while additional mists of suspicion arose before him making him imagine that the whole objection was caused by Guys dislike to submit to him and a fit of impatience of which Amy was the victim nay that his cousin wanted to escape from his surveillance and follow the beat of his inclinations and the whole heap of prejudices and halfrefuted accusations resumed their full ascendancy Never had his manner been more vexatious though without departing from the coolness which always characterized it but all the time Guy while firm and unmoved in purpose kept his temper perfectly and apparently without effort Even Amabel glowed with indignation at the assumption with which he was striving to put her husband down though she rejoiced to see its entire failure for some sensible argument or some gay lively goodhumoured reply was the utmost he could elicit Guy did not seem to be in the least irritated or ruffled by the very behaviour which used to cause him so many struggles Having once seriously said that he did not think it right to run into danger without adequate cause he held his position with so much ease that he could afford to be playful and laugh at his own dread of infection his changeableness and credulity Never had temper been more entirely subdued for surely if he could bear this he need never fear himself again
So passed the hour and Amabel was heartily glad when the debate was closed by Arnauds coming for orders Guy went with him Amabel began to collect her goods and Philip after a few moments reflection spoke in the halfcompassionate halfpatronizing manner with which he used now and then to let fall a few crumbs of counsel or commendation for silly little Amy
Well Amy you yielded very amiably and that is the only way You will always find it best to submit
He got no further in his intended warning against the dissipations of Venice for her eyes were fixed on him at first with a look of extreme wonder Then her face assumed an expression of dignity and gently but gravely she said I think you forget to whom you are speaking
The gentlemanlike instinct made him reply I beg your pardon—and there he stopped as much taken by surprise as if a dove had flown in his face He actually was confused for in very truth he had after a fashion forgotten that she was Lady Morville not the cousin Amy with whom Guys character might be freely discussed He had often presumed as far with his aunt but she though always turning the conversation had never given him a rebuff Amabel had not done and in her soft voice firmly though not angrily she spoke on One thing I wish to say because we shall never speak on this subject again and I was always afraid of you before You have always misunderstood him I might almost say chosen to misunderstand him You have tried his temper more than any one and never appreciated the struggles that have subdued it It is not because I am his wife that I say this—indeed I am not sure it becomes me to say it yet I cannot bear that you should not be told of it because you think he acts out of enmity to you You little know how your friendship has been his first desire—how he has striven for it—how after all you have done and written he defended you with all his might when those at home were angry—how he sought you out on purpose to try to be real cordial friends
Philips face had grown rigid and chiefly at the words those at home were angry It is not I that prevent that friendship said he it is his own want of openness My opinion has never changed
No I know it has never changed said Amy in a tone of sorrowful displeasure Whenever it does you will be sorry you have judged him so harshly
She left the room and Philip held her in higher esteem He saw there was spirit and substance beneath that soft girlish exterior and hoped she would better be able to endure the troubles which her precipitate marriage was likely to cause her but as to her husband his combined fickleness and obstinacy had only become more apparent than ever—fickleness in forsaking his purpose obstinacy in adherence to his own will
Displeased and contemptuous Philip was not softened by Guys freedom and openness of manner and desire to help him as far as their roads lay together He was gracious only to Lady Morville whom he treated with kindness intended to show that he was pleased with her for a reproof which became her position well though it could not hurt him Perhaps she thought this amiability especially insufferable for when she arrived at Varenna her chief thought was that here they should be free of him
Come Philip said Guy at that last moment I wish you would think better of it after all and come with us to Milan
Thank you my mind is made up
Well mind you dont catch the fever for I dont want the trouble of nursing you
Thank you I hope to require no such services of my friends said Philip with a proud stem air implying I dont want you
Goodbye then said Guy Then remembering his promise to Laura he added I wish we could have seen more of you They will be glad to hear of you at Hollywell You have had one warm friend there all along
He was touched for a moment by this kind speech and his tone was less grave and dignified Remember me to them when you write he answered and tell Laura she must not wear herself out with her studies Goodbye Amy I hope you will have a pleasant journey
The farewells were exchanged and the carriage drove off Poor little Amy said Philip to himself how she is improved He has a sweet little wife in her The fates have conspired to crown him with all man can desire and little marvel if he should abuse his advantages Poor little Amy I have less hope than ever since even her evident wishes could not bend his determination in this trifle but she is a good little creature happy in her blindness May it long continue It is my uncle and aunt who are to be blamed
He set himself to ascend the mountain path and they looked back watching the firm vigorous steps with which he climbed the hill side then stood to wave his hand to Amabel looking a perfect specimen of health and activity
Just like himself said Amy drawing so long a breath that Guy smiled but did not speak
Are you much vexed said she
I dont feel as if I had made the most of my opportunities
Then if you have not I can tell you who has What do you think of his beginning to give me a lecture how to behave to you
Did he think you wanted it very much
I dont know for of course I could not let him go on
Guy was so much diverted at the idea of her wanting a lecture on wifelike deportment that he had no time to be angry at the impertinence and he made her laugh also by his view that was all force of habit
Now Guido—good Cavaliere Guido—do grant me one satisfaction said she coaxingly Only say you are very glad he is gone his own way
On the contrary I am sorry he is running his head into a fever said Guy pretending to be provoking
I dont want you to be glad of that I only want you to be glad he is not sitting here towering over us Guy smiled and began to whistle—
Cock up your beaver and cock it fu sprush
CHAPTER 31
And turned the thistles of a curse
To types beneficent
—WORDSWORTH
It was about three weeks after the rendezvous at Bellagio that Sir Guy and Lady Morville arrived at Vicenza on their way from Venice They were in the midst of breakfast when Arnaud entered saying—
It was well Sir Guy that you changed your intention of visiting the Valtelline with Captain Morville
What Have you heard anything of him
I fear that his temerity has caused him to suffer I have just heard that an Englishman of your name is severely ill at Recoara
Where
At la badia di Recoara It is what in English we call a wateringplace on the mountains to the north where the Vicentini do go in summer for fraicheur but they have all returned in the last two days for fear of the infection
Ill go and make inquiries said Guy rising in haste Returning in a quarter of an hour he said—It is true It can be no other than poor Philip I have seen his doctor an Italian who when he saw our name written said it was the same He calls it una febbre molto grave
Very heavy Did he only know the name in writing
Only from seeing it on his passport He has been unable to give any directions
How dreadfully ill he must be And alone What shall we do You wont think of leaving me behind you whatever you do exclaimed Amabel imploringly
It is at no great distance and—
O dont say that Only take me with you I will try to bear it if you dont think it right but it will be very hard
Her eyes were full of tears but she struggled to repress them and was silent in suspense as she saw him considering
My poor Amy said he presently I believe the anxiety would be worse for you if I were to leave you here
Oh thank you exclaimed she
You will have nothing to do with the nursing No I dont think there is much risk so we will go together
Thank you thank you and perhaps I may be of some use But is it very infectious
I hope not caught at Colico and imported to a fresh place I should think there was little fear of its spreading However we must soon be off I am afraid he is very ill and almost deserted In the first place I had better send an express to the Consul at Venice to ask him to recommend us a doctor for I have not much faith in this Italian
They were soon on the way to Recoara a road bordered on one side by high rocks on the other by a little river flowing down a valley shut in by mountains The valley gradually contracted in the ascent till it became a ravine and further on a mere crevice marked by the thick growth of the chestnuttrees but before this greater narrowing they saw the roofs of the houses in the little town The sun shone clear the air had grown fresh as they mounted higher Amabel could hardly imagine sickness and sorrow in so fair a spot and turned to her husband to say so but he was deep in thought and she would not disturb him
The town was built on the bank of the stream and very much shut in by the steep crags which seemed almost to overhang the inn to which they drove auguring favourably of the place from its fresh clean aspect
Guy hastened to the patient while Amabel was conducted to a room with a polished floor and very little furniture and there waited anxiously until he returned There was a flush on his face and almost before he spoke he leant far out of the window to try to catch a breath of air
We must find another room for him directly said he He cannot possibly exist where he is—a little den—such an atmosphere of fever—enough to knock one down Will you have one got ready for him
Directly said Amabel ringing How is he
He is in a stupor it is not sleep He is frightfully ill I never felt anything like the heat of his skin But that stifling hole would account for much very likely he may revive when we get him into a better atmosphere No one has attended to him properly It is a terrible thing to be ill in a foreign country without a friend
Arnaud came and Amabel sent for the hostess while Guy returned to his charge Little care had been taken for the solitary traveller on foot too ill to exact attention and whose presence drove away custom but when his case was taken up by a Milord Inglese the people of the inn were ready to do their utmost to cause their neglect to be forgotten and everything was at the disposal of the Signora The rooms were many but very small and the best she could contrive was to choose three rooms on the lower floor rather larger than the rest and opening into each other as well as into the passage so that it was possible to produce a thorough draught Under her superintendence Anne made the apartment look comfortable and almost English and sending word that all was ready she proceeded to establish herself in the corresponding rooms on the floor above
Philip was perfectly unconscious when he was carried to his new room His illness had continued about a week and had been aggravated first by his incredulous and determined resistance of it and then by the neglect with which he had been treated It was fearful to see how his great strength had been cut down as there he lay with scarcely a sign of life except his gasping labouring breath Guy stood over him let the air blow in from the open window sprinkled his face with vinegar and moistened his lips longing for the physician for whom however he knew he must wait many hours Perplexed ignorant of the proper treatment fearing to do harm and extremely anxious he still was almost rejoiced for there was no one to whom he was so glad to do a service and a hope arose of full reconciliation
The patient was somewhat revived by the fresh air he breathed more freely moved and made a murmuring sound as if striving painfully for a word
Da bere at last he said and if Guy had not known its meaning it would have been plain from the gasping parched manner in which it was uttered
Some water said Guy holding it to his lips and on hearing the English Philip opened his eyes and as he drank gazed with a heavy sort of wonder Is that enough Do you like some on your forehead
Thank you
Is that more comfortable We only heard today you were ill
He turned away restlessly as if hardly glad to see Guy and not awake to the circumstances in a dull feverish oppression of the senses. Delirium soon came on or more properly delusion He was distressed by thinking himself deserted and struggling to speak Italian and when Guy replied in English though the native tongue seemed to fall kindly on his ear yet to Guys great grief the old dislike appeared to prevent all comfort in his presence though he could not repel his attentions At night the wandering increased till it became unintelligible raving and strength was required to keep him in bed
Amabel seldom saw her husband this evening He once came up to see her when she made him drink some coffee but he soon went telling her he should wait up and begging her to go to rest quietly as she looked pale and tired The night was a terrible one and morning only brought insensibility The physician arrived a sharplooking Frenchman who pronounced it to be a very severe and dangerous case more violent than usual in malaria fever and with more affection of the brain Guy was glad to be set to do something instead of standing by in inaction but ice and blisters were applied without effect and they were told that it was likely to be long before the fever abated
Day after day passed without improvement and with few gleams of consciousness, and even these were not free from wandering they were only intervals in the violent ravings or the incoherent murmurs and were never clear from some torturing fancy that he was alone and ill at Broadstone and neither the Edmonstones nor his brotherofficers would come to him or else that he was detained from Stylehurst Home was the word oftenest on his lips I would not go home the only expression that could sometimes be distinctly heard He was obliged to depend on Guy as the only Englishman at hand but whenever he recognized him the traces of repugnance were evident and in his clearer intervals he always showed a preference for Arnauds attendance Still Guy persevered indefatigably sitting up with him every night and showing himself an invaluable nurse with his tender hand modulated voice quick eye and quiet activity His whole soul was engrossed he never appeared to think of himself or to be sensible of fatigue but was only absorbed in the one thought of his patients comfort He seldom came to Amabel except at meals and now and then for a short visit to her sittingroom to report on Philips condition If he could spare a little more time when Philip was in a state of stupor she used to try to persuade him to take some rest and if it was late or in the heat of noon she could sometimes get him as a favour to her to lie down on the sofa and let her read to him but it did not often end in sleep and he usually preferred taking her out into the fresh air and wandering about among the chestnuttrees and green hillocks higher up in the ravine
Very precious were these walks with the quiet grave talk that the scene and the circumstances inspired—when he would tell the thoughts that had occupied him in his nightwatches and they shared the subdued and deep reflection suited to this period of apprehension These were her happiest times but they were few and uncertain She had in the meantime to wait to watch and hope alone though she had plenty of employment for besides writing constant bulletins all preparations for the sickroom fell to her share She had to send for or devise substitutes for all the conveniences that were far from coming readily to hand in a remote Italian inn—to give orders send commissions to Vicenza or even to Venice and to do a good deal with Annes assistance by her own manual labour Guy said she did more for Philip outside his room than he did inside and often declared how entirely at a loss he should have been if she had not been there with her ready resources and above all with her sweet presence making the short intervals he spent out of the sick chamber so much more than repose such refreshment at the time and in remembrance
Thus it had continued for more than a fortnight when one evening as the French physician was departing he told Guy that he would not fail to come the next night as he saw every reason to expect a crisis Guy sat intently marking every alteration in the worn flushed suffering face that rested helplessly on the pillows and every unconscious movement of the wasted nerveless limbs stretched out in pain and helplessness contrasting his present state with what he was when last they parted in the full pride of health vigour and intellect He dwelt on all that had passed between them from the first the strange ancestral enmity that nothing had as yet overcome the misunderstandings the prejudices the character whose faultlessness he had always revered and the repeated failure of all attempts to be friends as if his own impatience and passion had borne fruit in the merited distrust of the man whom of all others he respected and whom he would fain love as a brother He earnestly hoped that so valuable a life might be spared but if that might not be his fervent wish was that at least a few parting words of goodwill and reconciliation might be granted to be his comfort in remembrance
So mused Guy during the night as he watched the heavy doze between sleep and stupor and tried to catch the low indistinct mutterings that now and then seemed to ask for something Towards morning Philip awoke more fully and as Guy was feeling his pulse he faintly asked—
How many while his eyes had more of their usual expression
I cannot count returned Guy but it is less than in the evening Some drink
Philip took some then making an effort to look round said—What day is it
Saturday morning the 23rd of August
I have been ill a long time
You have indeed full three weeks but you are better tonight
He was silent for some moments then collecting himself and looking fixedly at Guy he said in his own steady voice though very feeble—I suppose humanly speaking it is an even chance between life and death
Yes said Guy firmly the low sweet tones of his voice full of tenderness You are very ill but not without hope Then after a pause during which Philip looked thoughtful but calm he added—I have tried to bring a clergyman here but I could not succeed Would you like me to read to you
Thank youpresently—but I have something to say Some more water—thank you Then after pausing Guy you have thought I judged you harshly I meant to act for the best
Dont think of that said Guy with a rush of joy at hearing the words of reconciliation he had yearned for so long
And now you have been most kind If I live you shall see that I am sensible of it and he feebly moved his hand to his cousin who pressed it hardly less happy than on the day he stood before Mrs Edmonstone in the dressingroom Presently Philip went on My sister has my will My love to her and to—to—to poor Laura His voice suddenly failed and while Guy was again moistening his lips he gathered strength and said—You and Amy will do what you can for her Do not let the blow come suddenly Ah you do not know We have been engaged this long time
Guy did not exclaim but Philip saw his amazement It was very wrong it was not her fault he added I cant tell you now but if I live all shall be told If not you will be kind to her
Indeed we will
Poor Laura again said Philip in a much weaker voice and after lying still a little longer he faintly whispered—Read to me
Guy read till he fell into a doze which lasted till Arnaud came in the morning and Guy went up to his wife
Amy said he entering with a quiet bright look he has spoken to me according to my wish
Then it is all right said Amabel answering his look with one as calm and sweet Is he better
Not materially his pulse is still very high but there was a gleam of perfect consciousness he spoke calmly and clearly fully understanding his situation Come what will it is a thing to be infinitely thankful for I am very glad Now for our morning reading
As soon as it was over and when Guy had satisfied himself that the patient was still quiet they sat down to breakfast Guy considered a little while and said—
I have been very much surprised Had you any idea of an attachment between him and Laura
I know she is very fond of him and she has always been his favourite What Has he been in love with her all this time poor fellow
He says they are engaged
Laura Our sister Oh Guy impossible He must have been wandering
I could have almost thought so but his whole manner forbade me to think there was any delusion He was too weak to explain but he said it was not her fault and was overcome when speaking of her He begged us to spare her from suddenly hearing of his death He was as calm and reasonable as I am at this moment No Amy it was not delirium
I dont know how to believe it said Amabel It is so impossible for Laura and for him too Dont you know how sometimes in fevers people take a delusion and are quite rational about everything else and that too if only it was true and dont you think it very likely that if he really has been in love with her all this time how much he must have gone through he may fancy he has been secretly engaged and reproach himself
I cannot tell said Guy there was a reality in his manner of speaking that refuses to let me disbelieve him Surely it cannot be one of the horrors of death that we should be left to reproach ourselves with the fancied sins we have been prone to as well as with our real ones Then—and he rose and walked about the room—if so more than ever in the hour of death good Lord deliver us
Amabel was silent and presently he sat down saying—Well time will show
I cannot think it said Amy Laura How could she help telling mamma And as Guy smiled at the recollection of their own simultaneous coming to mamma she added—Not only because it was right but for the comfort of it
But Amy do you remember what I told you of poor Lauras fears and what she said to me on our weddingday
Poor Laura said Amy Yet— She paused and Guy presently said—
Well I wont believe it if I can possibly help it I cant afford to lose my faith in my sisters perfection or Philips especially now But I must go I have loitered too long and Arnaud ought to go to his breakfast
Amabel sat long over the remains of her breakfast She did not puzzle herself over Philips confession for she would not admit it without confirmation and she could not think of his misdoings even those of which she was certain on the day when his life was hanging in the balance All she could bear to recollect was his excellence nay in the tenderness of her heart she nearly made out that she had always been very fond of him overlooking that even before Guy came to Hollywell she had always regarded him with more awe than liking been disinclined to his good advice shrunk from his condescension and regularly enjoyed Charless quizzing of him All this and all the subsequent injuries were forgotten and she believed as sincerely as her husband that Philip had been free from any unkind intention But she chiefly dwelt on her own Guy especially that last speech so unlike some of whom she had heard who were rather glad to find a flaw in a faultless model if only to obtain a fellowfeeling for it
Yes thought she he might look far without finding anything better than himself though he wont believe it If ever he could make me angry it will be by treating me as if I was better than he Such nonsense But I suppose his goodness would not be such if he was conscious of it so I must be content with him as he is I cant be so unwifelike after all for I am sure nothing makes me feel so small and foolish as that humility of his Come I must see about some dinner for the French doctor
She set to work on her housewifery cares but when these were despatched it was hard to begin anything else on such a day of suspense when she was living on reports from the sick room The delirium had returned more violent than ever and as she sat at her open window she often heard the disconnected words She could do nothing but listen—she could neither read nor draw and even letterwriting failed her today for it seemed cruel to send a letter to his sister and if Philip was not under a delusion it was still worse to write to Hollywell it made her shudder to think of the misery she might have inflicted in the former letters where she had not spared the detail of her worst fears and conjectures and by no means softened the account as she had done to his sister
Late in the afternoon the physician came and she heard of his being quieter indeed there were no sounds below It grew dark Arnaud brought lights and told her Captain Morville had sunk into stupor After another long space the doctor came to take some coffee and said the fever was lessening but that strength was going with it and if le malade was saved it would be owing to the care and attention of le chevalier
Of Guy she saw no more that evening The last bulletin was pencilled by him on a strip of paper and sent to her at eleven at night
Pulse almost nothing deadly faintness doctor does not give him up it may be many hours dont sit up you shall hear when there is anything decisive
Amy submitted and slowly put herself to bed because she thought Guy would not like to find her up but she had little sleep and that was dreamy full of the same anxieties as her waking moments and perhaps making the night seem longer than if she had been awake the whole time
At last she started from a somewhat sounder doze than usual and saw it was becoming light the white summits of the mountains were beginning to show themselves and there was twilight in the room Just then she heard a light cautious tread in the passage the lock of Guys dressingroom was gently slowly turned It was over then Life or death Her heart beat as she heard her husbands step in the next room and her suspense would let her call out nothing but—I am not asleep
Guy came forward and stood still while she looked up to the outline of his figure against the window With a kind of effort he said with forced calmness—Hell do now and came to the bedside His face was wet with tears and her eyes were overflowing After a few moments he murmured a few low words of deep thanksgivings and again there was a silence
He is asleep quietly and comfortably said Guy presently and his pulse is steadier The faintness and sinking have been dreadful the doctor has been sitting with his hand on his pulse telling me when to put the cordial into his mouth Twice I thought him all but gone and till within the last hour I did not think he could have revived but now the doctor says we may almost consider the danger as over
Oh how glad I am Was he sensible Could he speak
Sensible at least when not fainting but too weak to speak or often to look up When he did though it was very kindly very pleasantly And now This is joy coming in the morning Amy
I wonder if you are happier now than after the shipwreck said Amy after a silence
How can you ask The shipwreck was a gleam the first ray that came to cheer me in those penance hours when I was cut off from all and now oh Amy I cannot enter into it Such richness and fullness of blessing showered on me more than I ever dared to wish for or dream of both in the present and future hopes It seems more than can belong to man at least to me so unlike what I have deserved that I can hardly believe it It must be sent as a great trial
Amabel thought this so beautiful that she could not answer and he presently gave her some further particulars He went back in spite of her entreaties that he would afford himself a little rest saying that the doctor was obliged to go away and Philip still needed the most careful watching Amy could not sleep any more but lay musing over that everbrightening goodness which had lately at all times almost startled her from its very unearthliness
CHAPTER 32
Sure all things wear a heavenly dress
Which sanctifies their loveliness
Types of that endless resting day
When we shall be as changed as they
—HYMN FOR SUNDAY
From that time there was little more cause for anxiety Philip was indeed exceedingly reduced unable to turn in bed to lift his head or to speak except now and then a feeble whisper but the fever was entirely gone and his excellent constitution began rapidly to repair its ravages Day by day almost hour by hour he was rallying spending most of his time profitably in sleep and looking very contented in his short intervals of waking These became each day rather longer his voice became stronger and he made more remarks and inquiries His first care when able to take heed of what did not concern his immediate comfort was that Colonel Deane should be written to as his leave of absence was expired but he said not a word about Hollywell and Amabel therefore hoped her surmise was right that his confession had been prompted by a delirious fancy though Guy thought something was implied by his silence respecting the very persons of whom it would have been natural to have talked
He was very patient of his weakness and dependence always thankful and willing to be pleased and all that had been unpleasant in his manner to Guy was entirely gone He liked to be waited on by him and received his attentions without laborious gratitude just in the way partly affectionate partly matter of course that was most agreeable showing himself considerate of his fatigue though without any of his old domineering advice
One evening Guy was writing when Philip who had been lying still as if asleep asked Are you writing to Hollywell
Yes to Charlotte but there is no hurry it wont go till tomorrow Have you any message
No thank you
Guy fancied he sighed and there was a long silence at the end of which he asked Guy have I said anything about Laura
Yes said Guy putting down the pen
I thought so but I could not remember said Philip turning round and settling himself for conversation with much of his ordinary deliberate preparation I hope it was not when I had no command of myself
No you were seldom intelligible you were generally trying to speak Italian or else talking about Stylehurst The only time you mentioned her was the night before the worst
I recollect said Philip I will not draw back from the resolution I then made though I did not know whether I had spoken it let the consequences be what they may The worst is that they will fall the most severely on her and her implicit reliance on me was her only error
His voice was very low and so full of painful feeling that Guy doubted whether to let him enter on such a subject at present but remembering the relief of free confession he thought it best to allow him to proceed only now and then putting in some note of sympathy or of interrogation in word or gesture
I must explain said Philip that you may see how little blame can be imputed to her It was that summer three years ago the first after you came I had always been her chief friend I saw or thought I saw cause for putting her on her guard The result has shown that the danger was imaginary but no matter—I thought it real In the course of the conversation more of my true sentiments were avowed than I was aware of she was very young and before we either of us knew what we were doing it had been equivalent to a declaration Well I do not speak to excuse the concealment but to show you my motive If it had been known there would have been great displeasure and disturbance I should have been banished and though time might have softened matters we should both have had a great deal to go through Heaven knows what it may be now And Guy he added breaking off with trembling eagerness when did you hear from Hollywell Do you know how she has borne the news of my illness
We have heard since they knew of it said Guy the letter was from Mrs Edmonstone to Amy but she did not mention Laura
She has great strength she would endure anything rather than give way but how can she have borne the anxiety and silence You are sure my aunt does not mention her
Certain I will ask Amy for the letter if you like
No do not go I must finish since I have begun We did not speak of an engagement it was little more than an avowal of preference I doubt whether she understood what it amounted to and I desired her to be silent I deceived myself all along by declaring she was free and I had never asked for her promise but those things will not do when we see death face to face and a resolve made at such a moment must be kept let it bring what it may
True
She will be relieved she wished it to be known but I thought it best to wait for my promotion—the only chance of our being able to marry However it shall be put into her fathers hands as soon as I can hold a pen All I wish is that she should not have to bear the brunt of his anger
He is too kind and goodnatured to keep his displeasure long
If it would only light on the right head instead of on the head of the nearest You say she was harassed and out of spirits I wish you were at home Amy would comfort her and soften them
We hope to go back as soon as you are in travelling condition If you will come home with us you will be at hand when Mr Edmonstone is ready to forgive as I am sure he soon will be No one ever was so glad to forget his displeasure
Yes it will be over by the time I meet him for she will have borne it all There is the worst But I will not put off the writing as soon as I have the power Every day the concealment continues is a further offence
And present suffering is an especial earnest and hope of forgiveness said Guy I have no doubt that much may be done to make Mr Edmonstone think well of it
If any suffering of mine would spare hers sighed Philip You cannot estimate the difficulties in our way You know nothing of poverty—the bar it is to everything almost a positive offence in itself!'
This is only tiring yourself with talking said Guy perceiving how Philips bodily weakness was making him fall into a desponding strain You must make haste to get well and come home with us and I think we shall find it no such bad case after all Theres Amys fortune to begin with only waiting for such an occasion No I cant have you answer you have talked quite long enough
Philip was in a state of feebleness that made him willing to avoid the trouble of thinking by simply believing what he was told that it was no bad case He was relieved by having confessed though to the person whom a few weeks back he would have thought the last to whom he could have made such a communication over whom he had striven to assume superiority and therefore before whom he could have least borne to humble himself—nay whose own love he had lately traversed with an arrogance that was rendered positively absurd by this conduct of his own Nevertheless he had not shrunk from the confession His had been real repentance so far as he perceived his faults and he would have scorned to avail himself of the certainty of Guys silence on what he had said at the time of his extreme danger He had resolved to speak and had found neither an accuser nor a judge not even one consciously returning good for evil but a friend with honest simple straightforward kindness doing the best for him in his power and dreading nothing so much as hurting his feelings It was not the way in which Philip himself could have received such a confidence
As soon as Guy could leave him he went up to his wife Amy said he rather sadly we have had it out It is too true
Her first exclamation surprised him Then Charlie really is the cleverest person in the world
How Had he any suspicion
Not that I know of but more than once lately I have been alarmed by recollecting how he once said that poor Laura was so much too wise for her age that Nature would some day take her revenge and make her do something very foolish But has Philip told you all about it
Yes explained it all very kindly It must have cost him a great deal but he spoke openly and nobly It is the beginning of a full confession to your father
So it is true exclaimed Amabel as if she heard it for the first time How shocked mamma will be I dont know how to think it possible And poor Laura Imagine what she must have gone through for you know I never spared the worst accounts Do tell me all
Guy told what he had just heard and she was indignant
I cant be as angry with him as I should like said she now that he is sorry and ill but it was a great deal too bad I cant think how he could look any of us in the face far less expect to rule us all and interfere with you
I see I never appreciated the temptations of poverty said Guy thoughtfully I have often thought of those of wealth but never of poverty
I wish you would not excuse him I dont mind your doing it about ourselves because though he made you unhappy he could not make you do wrong Ah I know what you mean but that was over after the first minute and he only made you better for all his persecution but I dont know how to pardon his making poor Laura so miserable and leading her to do what was not right Poor dear girl no wonder she looked so worn and unhappy I cannot help being angry with him indeed Guy said she her eyes full of tears
The best pleading is his own repentance Amy I dont think you can be very unrelenting when you see how subdued and how altered he is You know you are to make him a visit tomorrow now the doctor says all fear of infection is over
I shall be thinking of poor Laura the whole time
And how she would like to see him in his present state What shall you do if I bring him home to Redclyffe Shall you go to Hollywell to comfort Laura
I shall wait till you send me Besides how can you invite company till we know whether we have a roof over our house or not What is he doing now
As usual he has an unlimited capacity for sleep
I wish you had I dont think you have slept two hours together since you left off sitting up
I am beginning to think it a popular delusion I do just as well without it
So you say but Mr Shene would never have taken such a fancy to you if you always had such purple lines as those under your eyes Look Is that a face for Sir Galahad or Sir Guy or any of the Round Table Come I wish you would lie down and be read to sleep
I should like a walk much better It is very cool and bright Will you come
They walked for some time talking over the conduct of Philip and Laura Amabel seemed quite oppressed by the thought of such a burthen of concealment She said she did not know what she should have done in her own troubles without mamma and Charlie and she could not imagine Lauras keeping silence through the time of Philips danger more especially as she recollected how appalling some of her bulletins had been The only satisfaction was in casting as much of the blame on him as possible
You know he never would let her read novels and I do believe that was the reason she did not understand what it meant
I think there is a good deal in that said Guy laughing though Charlie would say it is a very novel excuse for a young lady falling imprudently in love
I do believe if it was any one but Laura Charlie would be very glad of it He always fully saw through Philips supercilious shell
Amy
No let me go on Guy for you must allow that it was much worse in such a grave grand unromantic person who makes a point of thinking before he speaks than if it had been a hasty handoverhead man like Maurice de Courcy who might have got into a scrape without knowing it
That must have made the struggle to confess all the more painful and a most free noble openhearted confession it was
They tried to recollect all that had passed during that summer and to guess against whom he had wished to warn her but so far were they from divining the truth that they agreed it must either have been Maurice or some other wild Irishman
Next they considered what was to be done Philip must manage his confession his own way but they had it in their power greatly to soften matters and there was no fear that after the first shock Mr Edmonstone would insist on the engagement being broken off Philip should come to recover his health at Redclyffe where he would be ready to meet the first advance towards forgiveness—and Amabel thought it would soon be made Papas anger was sharp but soon over he was very fond of Philip and delighted in a love affair but she was afraid mamma would not get over it so soon for she would be excessively hurt and grieved And when I was naughty said Amy nothing ever made me so sorry as mammas kindness
Guy launched out into more schemes for facilitating their marriage than ever he had made for himself and the walk ended with extensive castle building on Philips account in the course of which Amy was obliged to become much less displeased Guy told her in the evening that she would have been still more softened if she could have heard him talk about Stylehurst and his father Guy had always wished to hear him speak of the Archdeacon though they had never been on terms to enter on such a subject And now Philip had been much pleased by Guys account of his walks to Stylehurst and taken pleasure in telling which were his old haunts making out where Guy had been and describing his fathers ways
The next day was Sunday and Amabel was to pay her cousin a visit Guy was very eager about it saying it was like a stage in his recovery and though the thought of her mother and Laura could not be laid aside she would not say a word to damp her husbands pleasure in the anticipation It seemed as if Guy wanting to bestow all he could upon his cousin in gratitude for his newlyaccorded friendship thought the sight of his little wife the very best thing he had to give
It was a beautiful day early in September with a little autumnal freshness in the mountain breezes that they enjoyed exceedingly Philips convalescence and their own escape might be considered as so far decided that they might look back on the peril as past Amabel felt how much cause there was for thankfulness and after all Philip was not half as bad now as when he was maintaining his system of concealment he had made a great effort and was about to do his best by way of reparation but it was so new to her to pity him that she did not know how to begin
She tried to make the day seem as Sundaylike as she could by putting on her white muslin dress and white ribbons with Charless hair bracelet and a brooch of beautiful silver workmanship which Guy had bought for her at Milan the only ornament he had ever given to her She sat at her window watching the groups of Italians in their holiday costume and dwelling on the strange thoughts that had passed through her mind often before in her lonely Sundays in this foreign land thinking much of her old home and Easthill Church wondering whether the letter had yet arrived which was to free them from anxiety and losing herself in a maze of uncomfortable marvels about Laura
Now then at length said Guy entering I only hope he has not knocked himself up with his preparations for he would make such a setting to rights that I told him I could almost fancy he expected the queen instead of only Dame Amabel Morville
He led her down opened the door and playfully announced Lady Morville I have done it right this time Here she is
She had of course expected to see Philip much altered but she was startled by the extent of the change for being naturally fair and highcoloured he was a person on whom the traces of illness were particularly visible The colour was totally gone even from his lips his cheeks were sunken his brow looked broader and more massive from the thinness of his face and the loss of his hair and his eyes themselves appeared unlike what they used to be in the hollows round them He seemed tranquil and comfortable but so wan weak and subdued and so different from himself that she was very much shocked as smiling and holding out a hand where the white skin seemed hardly to cover the bone and blue vein he said in a tone slow feeble and languid though cheerful—
Good morning Amy You see Guy was right after all I am sorry to have made your wedding tour end so unpleasantly
Nay most pleasantly since you are better said Amabel laughing because she was almost ready to cry and her displeasure went straight out of her head
Are you doing the honours of my room Guy said Philip raising his head from the pillow with a becoming shade of his ceremonious courtesy Give her a chair
Amy smiled and thanked him while he lay gazing at her as a sick person is apt to do at a flower or the first pretty enlivening object from which he is able to derive enjoyment and as if he could not help expressing the feeling he said—
Is that your weddingdress Amy
Oh no that was all lace and finery
You look so nice and bridal—
Theres a compliment that such an old wife ought to make the most of Amy said Guy looking at her with a certain proud satisfaction in Philips admiration It is high time to leave off calling you a bride after your splendid appearance at the party at Munich in all your whiteness and orangeflowers
That was quite enough of it said Amy smiling
Not at all said Philip you have all your troubles in the visiting line to come when you go home
Ah you know the people and will be a great help to us said Amy and Guy was much pleased to hear her taking a voluntary share in the invitation knowing as he did that she only half liked it
Thank you we shall see replied Philip
Yes we shall see when you are fit for the journey and it will not be long before we can begin by short stages You have got on wonderfully in the last few days How do you think he is looking Amy finished Guy with an air of triumph that was rather amusing considering what a pale skeleton face he was regarding with so much satisfaction
I dare say he is looking much mended said Amy but you must not expect me to see it
You cant get a compliment for me Guy said Philip I was a good deal surprised when Arnaud brought me the glass this morning
It is a pity you did not see yourself a week ago said Guy shaking his head drolly
It is certain as the French doctor says that monsieur has a very vigorous constitution
Charles says having a good constitution is only another name for undergoing every possible malady said Amy
Rather good said Guy for I certainly find it answer very well to have none at all
Havent you said Amy rather startled
Or how do you know said Philip especially as you never were ill
It is a dictum of old Walters the Moorworth doctor the last time I had anything to do with him when I was a small child I suppose I remembered it for its oracular sound and because I was not intended to listen He was talking over with Markham some illness I had just got through and wound up with He may be healthy and active now but he has no constitution there is a tendency to low fever and if he meets with any severe illness it will go hard with him
How glad I am I did not know that before cried Amy
Did you remember it when you came here said Philip
Yes said Guy not in the least conscious of the impression his words made on the others By the bye Philip I wish you would tell us how you fared after we parted and how you came here
I went on according to my former plan said Philip walking through the Valtelline and coming down by a mountain path I was not well at Bolzano but I thought it only fatigue which a Sundays rest would remove so on I went for the next two days in spite of pain in head and limbs
Not walking said Amy
Yes walking I thought it was stiffness from mountain climbing and that I could walk it off but I never wish to go through anything like what I did the last day between the up and downs of that mountain path and the dazzle of the snow and heat of the sun I meant to have reached Vicenza but I must have been quite knocked up when I arrived here though I cannot tell My head grew so confused that my dread all the way was that I should forget my Italian I can just remember conning a phrase over and over again lest I should lose it I suppose I was able to speak when I came here but the last thing I remember was feeling very ill in some room different from this quite alone and with a horror of dying deserted The next is a confused recollection of the relief of hearing English again and seeing my excellent nurse here
There was a little more talk but a little was enough for Philips feeble voice and Guy soon told him he was tired and ordered in his broth He begged that Amy would stay and it was permitted on condition that he would not talk Guy even cutting short a quotation of—As Juno had been sick and he her dieter—appropriate to the excellence of the broths which Amabel and her maid thanks to their experience of Charless fastidious tastes managed to devise and execute in spite of bad materials It was no small merit in Guy to stop the compliment considering how edified he had been by his wifes unexpected ingenuity and what a comical account he had written of it to her mother such as Amy told him deserved to be published in a book of good advice to young ladies to show what they might come to if they behaved well However she was glad to have ocular demonstration of the success of the cookery which she had feared might turn out uneatable and her gentle feelings towards Philip were touched by seeing one wont to be full of independence and selfassertion now meek and helpless requiring to be lifted and propped up with pillows and depending entirely and thankfully upon Guy
When he had been settled and made comfortable they read the service and she thought her husbands tones had never been so sweet as now modulated to the pitch best suited to the sickroom and with the peculiarly beautiful expression he always gave such reading It was the lesson from Jeremiah on the different destiny of Josiah and his sons and he read that verse Weep ye not for the dead neither bemoan him but weep sore for him that goeth away for he shall return no more nor see his native country with so remarkable a melancholy and beauty in his voice that she could hardly refrain from tears and it also greatly struck Philip who had been so near returning no more neither seeing his native country
When the reading was over and they were leaving him to rest while they went to dinner he said as he wished Amy goodbye Till now I never discovered the practical advantage of such a voice as Guys There never was such a one for a sickroom Last week I could not bear any one else to speak at all and even now no one else could have read so that I could like it
Your voice yes said Amy after they had returned to their own sittingroom I want to hear it very much I wonder when you will sing to me again
Not till he has recovered strength to bear the infliction with firmness said Guy but Amy Ill tell you what we will do if you are sure it is good for you He will have a good long sleep and we will have a walk on the green hillocks
Accordingly they wandered in the cool of the evening on the grassy slopes under the chestnuttrees making it a Sunday walk calm bright and meditative without many words but those deep and grave such as their walks had been before they were married as Amabel said
Better he answered
A silence broken by her asking Do you recollect your melancholy definition of happiness years ago
What was it
Gleams from another world too soon eclipsed or forfeited It made me sad then Do you hold to it now
Dont you
I want to know what you would say now
Gleams from another world brightening as it gets nearer
Amabel repeated—
Ever the richest tenderest glow
Sets round the autumnal sun
But their sight fails no heart may know
The bliss when life is done
Old age she added that seems very far off
Each day is a step he answered and then came a silence while both were thinking deeply
They sat down to rest under a tree the mountains before them with heavy dark clouds hanging on their sides and the white crowns clear against the blue sky a perfect stillness on all around and the red glow of an Italian sunset just fading away
There is only one thing wanting said Amy You may sing now You are far from Philips hearing Suppose we chant this afternoons psalms
It was the fifth day of the month and the psalms seemed especially suitable to their thoughts Before the 29th was finished it was beginning to grow dark There were a few pale flashes of lightning in the mountains and at the words The voice of the Lord shaketh the wilderness a low but solemn peal of thunder came as an accompaniment
The Lord shall give his people the blessing of peace
The full sweet melody died away but the echo caught it up and answered like the chant of a spirit in the distance—The blessing of peace
The effect was too solemn and mysterious to be disturbed by word or remark Guy drew her arm into his and they turned homewards
They had some distance to walk and night had closed in before they reached the village but was only more lovely The thunder rolled solemnly among the hills but the young moon shone in marvellous whiteness on the snowy crowns casting fantastic shadows from the crags while whole showers of fireflies were falling on them from the trees floating and glancing in the shade
It is a pity to go in said Amy But Arnaud did not seem to be of the same opinion he came out to meet them very anxiously expostulating on the dangers of the autumnal dew and Guy owned that though it had been the most wonderful and delightful evening he had ever known he was rather fatigued
CHAPTER 33
From darkness here and dreariness
We ask not full repose
—CHRISTIAN YEAR
It seemed as if the fatigue which Guy had undergone was going to make itself felt at last for he had a slight headache the next morning and seemed dull and weary Both he and Amabel sat for some time with Philip and when she went away to write her letters Philip began discussing a plan which had occurred to him of offering himself as chief of the constabulary force in the county where Redclyffe was situated It was an office which would suit him very well and opened a new hope of his marriage and he proceeded to reckon on Lord Thorndales interest counting up all the magistrates he knew and talking them over with Guy who however did not know enough of his own neighbourhood to be of much use and when he came upstairs a little after said he was vexed at having been so stupid He was afraid he had seemed unkind and indifferent But the truth was that he was so heavy and drowsy that he had actually fallen twice into a doze while Philip was talking
Of course said Amy gentle sleep will take her revenge at last for your calling her a popular delusion Lie down let her have her own way and you will be good for something by and by
He took her advice slept for a couple of hours and awoke a good deal refreshed so that though his head still ached he was able to attend as usual to Philip in the evening
He did not waken the next morning till so late that he sprung up in consternation and began to dress in haste to go to Philip but presently he came back from his dressingroom with a hasty uncertain step and threw himself down on the bed Amabel came to his side in an instant much frightened at his paleness but he spoke directly Only a fit of giddiness—it is going off and he raised himself but was obliged to lie down again directly
You had better keep quiet said she Is it your headache
It is aching said Guy and she put her hand over it
How hot and throbbing said she You must have caught cold in that walk No dont try to move it is only making it worse
I must go to Philip he answered starting up but this brought on such a sensation of dizziness and faintness that he sunk back on the pillow
No it is of no use to fight against it said Amy as soon as he was a little better Never mind Philip Ill go to him You must keep quiet and I will get you a cup of hot tea
As he lay still she had the comfort of seeing him somewhat revived but he listened to her persuasions not to attempt to move It was later than she had expected and she found that breakfast was laid out in the next room She brought him some tea but he did not seem inclined to lift his head to drink it and begged her to go at once to Philip fearing he must be thinking himself strangely forgotten and giving her many directions about the way he liked to be waited on at breakfast
Very much surprised was Philip to see her instead of her husband and greatly concerned to hear that Guy was not well
Overfatigue said he He could not but feel the effects of such longcontinued exertion Then after an interval during which he had begun breakfast with many apologies for letting her wait on him he said with some breaks Never was there such a nurse as he Amy I have felt much more than I can express especially now You will never have to complain of my harsh judgment again
It is too much for you to talk of these things said Amabel moved by the trembling of his feeble voice but too anxious to return to her husband to like to wait even to hear that Philips opinion had altered It required much selfcommand not to hurry even by manner her cousins tardy languid movements but she had been well trained by Charles in waiting on sick breakfasts
When at length she was able to escape she found that Guy had undressed and gone to bed again He said he was more comfortable and desired her to go and take her own breakfast before coming back to him and she obeyed as well as she could but very soon was again with him He looked flushed and oppressed and when she put her cool hand across his forehead she was frightened at the increased throbbing of his temples
Amy said he looking steadily at her this is the fever
Without answering she drew his hand into hers and felt his pulse which did indeed plainly respond fever Each knew that the other was recollecting what he had said on Sunday of the doctors prediction and Amy knew he was thinking of death but all that passed was a proposal to send at once for the French physician Amabel wrote her note with steadiness derived from the very force of the shock She could not think she did not know whether she feared or hoped To act from one moment to another was all she attempted and it was well that her imagination did not open to be appalled at her own situation—so young alone with the charge of two sick men in a foreign country her cousin indeed recovering but helpless and not even in a state to afford her counsel her husband sickening for this frightful fever and with more than ordinary cause for apprehension even without the doctors prophecy when she thought of his slight frame and excitable temperament and that though never as yet tried by a days illness he certainly had more spirit than strength while all the fatigue he had been undergoing was likely to tell upon him now She did not look forward she did not look round she did not hope or fear she trusted and did her best for each as she was wanted trying not to make herself useless to both by showing that she wished to be in two places at once
It was a day sufficiently distressing in itself had there been no further apprehension for there was the restlessness of illness working on a character too active and energetic to acquiesce without a trial in the certainty that there was no remedy for present discomfort There was no impatience nor rebellion against the illness itself, but a wish to try one after another the things that had been effective in relieving Philip during his recovery At the same time he could not bear that Amabel should do anything to tire herself and was very anxious that Philip should not be neglected He tossed from one side to the other in burning oppression or cold chills Amy saw him looking wistful suggested something by way of alleviation then found he had been wishing for it but refraining from asking in order to spare her and that he was sorry when she procured it Again and again this happened she smoothed the coverings and shook up the pillow he would thank her look at her anxiously beg her not to exert herself but soon grew restless and the whole was repeated
At last as she was trying to arrange the coverings he exclaimed—
I see how it is This is impatience Now I will not stir for an hour and as he made the resolution he smiled at treating himself so like a child His power of self-restraint came to his aid and long before the hour was over he had fallen asleep
This was a relief yet that oppressed flushed discomposed slumber and heavy breathing only confirmed her fears that the fever had gained full possession of him She had not the heart to write such tidings at least till the physician should have made them too certain nor could she even bear to use the word feverish in her answers to the anxious inquiries Philip made whenever she went into his room though when he averted his face with a heavy sigh she knew his conclusion was the same as her own
The opinion of the physician was the only thing wanting to bring home the certainty and that fell on her like lead in the evening with one comfort however that he thought it a less severe case than the former one It was a great relief too that there was no wandering of mind only the extreme drowsiness and oppression and when Guy was roused by the doctors visit he was as clear and collected as possible making inquiries and remarks and speaking in a particularly calm and quiet manner As soon as the doctor was gone he looked up to Amabel saying with his own smile only very dim—
It would be of no use and it would not be true to say I had rather you did not nurse me The doctor hopes there is not much danger of infection and it is too late for precautions
I am very glad said Amy
But you must be wise and not hurt yourself Will you promise me not to sit up
It is very kind of you to tell me nothing worse said she with a sad submissiveness
He smiled again I am very sorry for you he said looking very tenderly at her To have us both on your hands at once But it comes straight from Heaven that is one comfort and you made up your mind to such things when you took me
Sadness in his eye a sweet smile on his lip and serenity on his brow joined with the fevered cheek the air of lassitude and the panting oppressed breath there was a strange melancholy beauty about him and while Amy felt an impulse of ardent clinging affection to one so precious to her there was joined with it a sort of awe and veneration for one who so spoke looked and felt She hung over him and sprinkled him with EaudeCologne then as his hair teased him by falling into his eyes he asked her to cut the front lock off There was something sad in doing this for that tumbledown wave as Charlotte called it was rather a favourite of Amys it always seemed to have so much sympathy with his moods and it was as if parting with it was resigning him to a long illness However it was too troublesome not to go and he looked amused at the care with which she folded up the glossy brown wave and treasured it in her dressingcase then she read to him a few verses of a psalm and he soon fell into another doze
There was little more of event day after day The fever never ran as high as in Philips case and there was no delirium There was almost constant torpor but when for any short space he was thoroughly awakened his mind was perfectly clear though he spoke little and then only on the subject immediately presented to him There he lay for one quiet hour after another while Amy sat by him with as little consciousness of time as he had himself looking neither forward nor backward only to the present to give him drink bathe his face and hands arrange his pillows or read or repeat some soothing verse It always was a surprise when meal times summoned her to attend to Philip when she was asked for the letters for the post when evening twilight gathered in or when she had to leave the nightwatch to Arnaud and go to bed in the adjoining room
This was a great trial but he would not allow her to sit up and her own sense showed her that if this was to be a long illness it would not do to waste her strength She knew he was quiet at night and her trustful temper so calmed and supported her that she was able to sleep and thus was not as liable to be overworked as might have been feared and as Philip thought she must be
She always appeared in his room with her sweet face mournful and anxious but never ruffled or with any air of haste or discomfiture desirous as she was to return to her husband for though he frequently sent her to take care of herself or of Philip she knew that while she was away he always grew more restless and uncomfortable and his look of relief at her reentrance said as much to her as a hundred complaints of her absence would have done
Philip was in the meantime sorely tried by being forced to be entirely inactive and dependent while he saw Amabel in such need of assistance and so far from being able to requite Guys care he could only look on himself as the cause of their distress and an addition to it—a burthen instead of a help If he had been told a little while ago what would be the present state of things he would almost have laughed the speaker to scorn He would never have thought a child as competent as Amy to the sole management of two sick persons and he not able either to advise or cheer her Yet he could not see anything went wrong that depended on her His comforts were so cared for that he was often sorry she should have troubled herself about them and though he could have little of her company he never was allowed to feel himself deserted Anne Arnaud the old Italian nurse or Amy herself were easily summoned and gave him full care and attention
He was however necessarily a good deal alone and though his cousins books were at his disposal eyes and head were too weak for reading and he was left a prey to his own thoughts His great comfort was that Guy was less ill than he had been himself and that there was no present danger otherwise he could never have endured the conviction that all had been caused by his own imprudence Imprudence Philip was brought very low to own that such a word applied to him yet it would have been well for him had that been the chief burthen on his mind Was it only an ordinary service of friendship and kindred that Guy had at the peril of his own life rendered him Was it not a positive return of good for evil Yes evil He now called that evil or at least harshness and hastiness in judgment which he had hitherto deemed true friendship and consideration for Guy and Amy Every feeling of distrust and jealousy had been gradually softening since his recovery began gratitude had done much and dismay at Guys illness did more It would have been noble and generous in Guy to act as he had done had Philips surmises been correct and this he began to doubt though it was his only justification and even to wish to lose it He had rather believe Guy blameless He would do so if possible and he resolved on the first opportunity to beg him to give him one last assurance that all was right and implicitly believe him But how was it possible again to assume to be a ruler and judge over Guy after it was known how egregiously he himself had erred There was shame sorrow selfhumiliation and anxiety wherever he turned and it was no wonder that depression of spirits retarded his recovery
It was not till the tenth day after Guys illness had begun that Philip was able to be dressed and to come into the next room where Amabel had promised to dine with him As he lay on the sofa she thought he looked even more ill than in bed the change from his former appearance being rendered more visible and his great height making him look the more thin He was apparently exhausted with the exertion of dressing for he was very silent all dinnertime though Amabel could have better talked today than for some time past since Guy had had some refreshing sleep was decidedly less feverish seemed better for nourishing food and said that he wanted nothing but a puff of Redclyffe wind to make him well He was pleased to hear of Philips step in recovery and altogether Amy was cheered and happy
She left her cousin as soon as dinner was over and did not come to him again for nearly an hour and a half She was then surprised to find him finishing a letter resting his head on one hand and looking wan weary and very unhappy
Have you come to letter writing
Yes he answered in a worn dejected tone I must ask you to direct this I cant make it legible
No wonder so much did his hand tremble as he held out the envelope
To your sister she asked
No to yours I never wrote to her before Theres one enclosed to your father to tell all
I am glad you have done it answered Amy in a quiet tone of sincere congratulation You will be better now it is off your mind But how tired you are You must go back to bed Shall I call Arnaud
I must rest first—and his voice failing he laid back on the sofa closed his eyes turned ashy pale and became so faint that she could not leave him and was obliged to apply every restorative within reach before she could bring him back to a state of tolerable comfort
The next minute her work was nearly undone when Anne came in to ask for the letters for the post Shall I send yours asked Amy
He muttered an assent But when she looked back to him after speaking to Anne she saw a tremulous almost convulsed working of the closed eyes and mouth while the thin hands were clenched together with a force contrasting with the helpless manner in which they had hung a moment before She guessed at the intensity of anguish it mast cost a temper so proud a heart of so strong a mould and feelings so deep to take the first irrevocable step in selfhumiliation giving up into the hands of others the engagement that had hitherto been the cherished treasure of his life and above all in exposing Laura to bear the brunt of the penalty of the fault into which he had led her Oh for Guy to comfort him thought she feeling herself entirely incompetent dreading to intrude on his feelings yet thinking it unkind to go away without one sympathizing word when he was in such distress
You will be glad in time at last she said He made no answer
She held the stimulants to him again and tried to arrange him more comfortably
Thank you at last he said How is Guy
He has just had another nice quiet sleep and is quite refreshed
That is a blessing at least But does not he want you I have been keeping you a long time
Thank you as he is awake I should like to go back You are better now
Yes while I dont move
Dont try Ill send Arnaud and as soon as you can you had better go to bed again
Guy was still awake and able to hear what she had to tell him about Philip
Poor fellow said he We must try to soften it
Shall I write said Amy Mamma will be pleased to hear of his having told you and they must be sorry for him when they hear how much the letter cost him
Ah they will not guess at half his sorrow
I will write to papa and send it after the other letters so that he may read it before he hears of Philips
Poor Laura said Guy Could not you write a note to her too I want her to be told that I am very sorry if I ever gave her pain by speaking thoughtlessly of him
Nay said Amy smiling you have not much to reproach yourself with in that way It was I that always abused him
You can never do so again
No I dont think I can now I have seen his sorrow
Amabel was quite in spirits as she brought her writing to his bedside and read her sentences to him as she composed the letter to her father while he suggested and approved It was a treat indeed to have him able to consult with her once more and he looked so much relieved and so much better that she felt as if it was the beginning of real improvement though still his pulse was fast and the fever though lessened was not gone
The letter was almost as much his as her own and he ended his dictation thus Say that I am sure that if I get better we may make arrangements for their marriage
Then as Amy was finishing the letter with her hopes of his amendment he added speaking to her and not dictating—If not—she shrank and shivered but did not exclaim for he looked so calm and happy that she did not like to interrupt him—If not you know it will be very easy to put the money matters to rights whatever may happen
CHAPTER 34
Sir
It is your fault I have loved Posthumus
You bred him as my playfellow and he is
A man worth any woman overbuys me
Almost the sum he pays
—CYMBELINE
The first tidings of Philips illness arrived at Hollywell one morning at breakfast and were thus announced by Charles—
There So he has been and gone and done it
What Who Not Guy
Here has the Captain gone and caught a regular bad fever in some malaria hole delirious and all that sort of thing and of course our wise brother and sister must needs go and nurse him by way of a pretty little interlude in their wedding tour
Lauras voice alone was unheard in the chorus of inquiry She sat cold stiff and silent devouring with her ears each reply that fell like a deathblow while she was mechanically continuing the occupations of breakfast When all was told she hurried to her own room but the want of sympathy was becoming intolerable If Amabel had been at home she must have told her all There was no one else and the misery to be endured in silence was dreadful Her dearest—her whole joy and hope—suffering dying and to hear all round her speaking of him with kindness indeed but what to her seemed indifference blaming him for wilfulness saying he had drawn it on himself—it seemed to drive her wild She conjured up pictures of his sufferings and dreaded Guys inexperience the want of medical advice imagining everything that was terrible Her idol to whom her whole soul was devoted was passing from her and no one pitied her while the latent consciousness of disobedience debarred her from gaining solace from the only true source All was blank desolation—a wild agony untempered by resignation uncheered by prayer for though she did pray it was without trust without hope while her wretchedness was rendered more overwhelming by her efforts to conceal it These were so far ineffectual that no one could help perceiving that she was extremely unhappy but then all the family knew she was very fond of Philip and neither her mother nor brother could be surprised at her distress though it certainly appeared to them excessive Mrs Edmonstone was very sorry for her and very affectionate and considerate but Laura was too much absorbed in her own feelings to perceive or to be grateful for her kindness and as each day brought a no better report her despair became so engrossing that she could not attempt any employment She wandered in the garden sat in dreamy fits of silence in the house and at last after receiving one of the worst accounts sat up in her dressinggown the whole of one night in one dull heavy motionless trance of misery
She recollected that she must act her part dressed in the morning and came down but her looks were ghastly she tasted no food and as soon as possible left the breakfastroom Her mother was going in quest of her when old nurse came with an anxious face to say—Maam I am afraid Miss Edmonstone must be very ill or something Do you know maam her bed has not been slept in all night
You dont say so nurse
Yes maam Jane told me so and I went to look myself Poor child she is half distracted about Master Philip and no wonder for they were always together but I thought you ought to know maam for she will make herself ill to a certainty
I am going to see about her this moment nurse said Mrs Edmonstone and presently she found Laura wandering up and down the shady walk in the restlessness of her despair
Laura dearest said she putting her arm round her I cannot bear to see you so unhappy
Laura did not answer for though solitude was oppressive every ones presence was a burthen
I cannot think it right to give way thus continued her mother Did you really sit up all night my poor child
I dont know They did so with him
My dear this will never do You are making yourself seriously unwell
I wish—I wish I was ill I wish I was dying broke from Laura almost unconsciously in a hoarse inward voice
My dear You dont know what you are saying You forget that this selfabandonment and extravagant grief would be wrong in any one and if nothing else the display is unbecoming in you
Lauras overwrought feelings could bear no more and in a tone which though too vehement to be addressed to a parent had in it an agony which almost excused it by showing how unable she was to restrain herself she broke forth——Unbecoming Who has a right to grieve for him but me—his own his chosen—the only one who can love him or understand him Her voice died away in a sob though without tears
Her mother heard the words but did not take in their full meaning and believing that Lauras undeveloped affection had led her to this uncontrolled grief she spoke again with coldness intended to rouse her to a sense that she was compromising her womanly dignity
Take care Laura a woman has no right to speak in such a manner of a man who has given her no reason to believe in his preference of her
Preference It is his love—his love His whole heart The one thing that was precious to me in this world Preference You little guess what we have felt for each other
Laura Mrs Edmonstone stood still overpowered What do you mean She could not put the question more plainly
What have I done cried Laura I have betrayed him she answered herself in a tone of despair as she hid her face in her hands betrayed him when he is dying
Her mother was too much shocked to speak in the soft reluctant manner in which she was wont to reprove
Laura said she I must understand this What has passed between you and Philip
Laura only replied by a flood of tears ungovernable from the exhaustion of sleeplessness and want of food Mrs Edmonstones kindness returned she soothed her begged her to control herself and at length brought her into the house and up to the dressingroom where she sank on the sofa weeping violently It was the reaction of the long restraint she had been exercising on herself and the silence she had been maintaining She was not feeling the humiliation her own acknowledgement of disobedience but of the horror of being forced to reveal the secret he had left in her charge
Long did she weep breaking out more piteously at each attempt of her mother to lead her to explain Poor Mrs Edmonstone was alarmed and perplexed beyond measure this half confession had so overthrown all her ideas that she was ready to apprehend everything most improbable and almost expected to hear of a private marriage Her presence seemed only to make Laura worse and at length she said—I shall leave you for half an hour in hopes that by that time you may have recovered yourself and be able to give the explanation which I require
She went into her own room and waited with her eyes on her watch a prey to every strange alarm and anticipation grievously hurt at this want of confidence and wounded where she least expected it by both daughter and nephew She thought guessed recollected wondered tormented herself and at the last of the thirty minutes hastily opened the door into the dressingroom Laura sat as before crouched up in the corner of the wide sofa and when she raised her face at her mothers entrance it was bewildered rather than embarrassed
Well Laura She waited unanswered and the wretchedness of the look so touched her that kissing her she said Surely my dear you need not be afraid to tell me anything
Laura did not respond to the kindness but asked looking perplexed What have I said Have I told it
What you have given me reason to believe said Mrs Edmonstone trying to bring herself to speak it explicitly that you think Philip is attached to you You do not deny it Let me know on what terms you stand
Without looking up she murmured If you would not force it from me at such a time
Laura it is for your own good You are wretched now my poor child why not relieve yourself by telling all If you have not acted openly can you have any comfort till you have confessed It may be a painful effort but relief will come afterwards
I have nothing to confess said Laura There is no such thing as you think
No engagement
No
Then what am I to understand by your exclamations
It is no engagement repeated Laura He would never have asked that without papas consent We are only bound by our own hearts
And you have a secret understanding with him
We have never written to each other we have never dreamed of any intercourse that could be called clandestine He would scorn it He waited only for his promotion to declare it to papa
And how long has it been declared to you
Ever since the first summer Guy was here
Three years exclaimed her mother You have kept this from me three years O Laura
It was of no use to speak said Laura faintly
If she had looked up she would have seen those words no use cut her mother more deeply than all but there was only coldness in the tone of the answer No use to inform your parents before you pledged your affections
Indeed mamma said Laura I was sure that you knew his worth
Worth when he was teaching you to live in a course of insincerity Your father will be deeply hurt
Papa Oh you must not tell him Now I have betrayed him indeed Oh my weakness and another paroxysm of tears came on
Laura you seem to think you owe nothing to any one but Philip You forget you are a daughter that you have been keeping up a system of disobedience and concealment of which I could not have believed a child of mine could be capable O Laura how you have abused our confidence
Laura was touched by the sorrow of her tone and throwing her arms round her neck sobbed out You will forgive me only forgive him
Mrs Edmonstone was softened in a moment Forgive you my poor child You have been very unhappy and she kissed her with many tears
Must you tell papa whispered Laura
Judge for yourself Laura Could I know such a thing and hide it from him
Laura ceased seeing her determined and yielded to her pity allowing herself to be nursed as she required so exhausted was she She was laid on the sofa and made comfortable with pillows in her mothers gentlest way When Mrs Edmonstone was called away Laura held her dress saying You are kind to me but you must forgive him Say you have forgiven him mamma dearest
My dear in the grave all things are forgiven
She could not help saying so but feeling as if she had been cruel she added I mean while he is so ill we cannot enter on such a matter I am very sorry for you proceeded she still arranging for Lauras ease then kissing her hoped she would sleep and left her
Sympathy was a matter of necessity to Mrs Edmonstone and as her husband was out she went at once to Charles with a countenance so disturbed that he feared some worse tidings had come from Italy
No no nothing of that sort it is poor Laura
Eh said Charles with a significant though anxious look that caused her to exclaim—
Surely you had no suspicion
Charlotte who was reading in the window trembled lest she should be seen and sent away
I suspected poor Laura had parted with her heart But what do you mean What has happened
Could you have guessed but first remember how ill he is dont be violent Charlie Could you have guessed that they have been engaged ever since the summer we first remarked them
She had expected a great storm but Charles only observed very coolly Oh it is come out at last
You dont mean that you knew it
No indeed you dont think they would choose me for their confidant
Not exactly said Mrs Edmonstone with the odd sort of laugh with which even the most sensitive people in the height of their troubles reply to anything ludicrous but really she continued every idea of mine is so turned upsidedown that I dont know what to think of anybody
We always knew Laura to be his slave and automaton He is so infallible in her eyes that no doubt she thought her silence an act of praiseworthy resolution
She was a mere child poor dear said her mother only eighteen Yet Amy was but a year older last summer How unlike She must have known what she was doing
Not with her senses surrendered to him without volition of her own I wonder by what magnetism he allowed her to tell
She has gone through a great deal poor child and I am afraid there is much more for her to suffer whether he recovers or not
He will recover said Charles with the decided manner in which people prophesy the restoration of those they dislike probably from a feeling that they must not die till there is more charity in their opinion of them
Your father will be so grieved
Well I suppose we must begin to make the best of it said Charles She has been as good as married to him these four years for any use she has been to us it has been only the name of the thing so he had better—
My dear Charlie what are you talking of You dont imagine they can marry
They will some time or other for assuredly neither will marry any one else You will see if Guy does not take up the cause and return Philips meddling—which by the bye is now shown to have been more preposterous still—by setting their affairs in order for them
Dear Guy it is a comfort not to have been deceived in him
Except when you believed Philip said Charles
Could anything have been more different proceeded Mrs Edmonstone yet the two girls had the same training
With an important exception said Charles Laura is Philips pupil Amy mine and I think her little ladyship is the best turned out of hand
How shocked Amy will be If she was but here it would be much better for she always had more of Lauras confidence than I Oh Charlie there has been the error and Mrs Edmonstones eyes were full of tears What fearful mistake have I made to miss my daughters confidence
You must not ask me mother said Charles face and voice full of affectionate emotion I know too well that I have been exacting and selfish taking too much advantage of your anxieties for me and that if you were not enough with my sisters when they were young girls it was my fault as much as my misfortune But after all it has not hurt Amy in the least nor do I think it will hurt Charlotte
Charlotte did not venture to give way to her desire to kiss her mother and thank Charles lest she should be exiled as an intruder
And proceeded Charles serious though somewhat roguish I suspect that no attention would have made much difference You were always too young and Laura too much addicted to the physical sciences to get on together
A weak silly mother sighed Mrs Edmonstone
This was too much for Charlotte who sprang forward and flung her arms round her neck sobbing out—
Mamma dear mamma dont say such horrid things No one is half so wise or so good—I am sure Guy thinks so too
At the same time Bustle perceiving a commotion made a leap planted his forefeet on Mrs Edmonstones lap wagging his tail vehemently and trying to lick her face It was not in human nature not to laugh and Mrs Edmonstone did so as heartily as either of the young ones indeed Charlotte was the first to resume her gravity not being sure of her ground and being hurt at her impulse of affection being thus reduced to the absurd She began to apologize—
Dear mamma I could not help it I thought you knew I wad in the room
My dear child and her mother kissed her warmly I dont want to hide anything from you You are my only homedaughter now Then recollecting her prudence she proceeded—You are old enough to understand the distress this insincerity of poor Lauras has occasioned—and now that Amy is gone we must look to you to comfort us
Did ever maiden of fourteen feel more honoured and obliged to be very good and wise than Charlotte as she knelt by her mothers side Happily tact was coming with advancing years and she did not attempt to mingle in the conversation which was resumed by Charles observing that the strangest part of the affair was the incompatibility of so novelish and imprudent a proceeding with the cautious thoughtful character of both parties It was he said analogous to a pentagon flirting with a hexagon whereas Guy a knight of the Round Table in name and nature and Amy with her little superstitions had been attached in the most matterof-fact, humdrum way and were in a course of living very happy ever after for which nature could never have designed them Mrs Edmonstone smiled sighed hoped they were prudent and wondered whether camphor and chloride of lime were attainable at Recoara
Laura came down no more that day for she was worn out with agitation and it was a relief to be sufficiently unwell to be excused facing her father and Charles She had little hope that Charlotte had not heard all but she might seem to believe her ignorant and could therefore endure her waiting on her with an elaborate kindness and compassion and tiptoe silence far beyond the deserts of her slight indisposition
In the evening Charles and his mother broke the tidings to Mr Edmonstone as gently as they could Charles feeling bound to be the cool thinking head in the family Of course Mr Edmonstone stormed vowed that he could not have believed it then veered round and said he could have predicted it from the first It was all mammas fault for letting him be so intimate with the girls—how was a poor lad to be expected not to fall in love Next he broke into great wrath at the abuse of his confidence then at the interference with Guy then at the intolerable presumption of Philips thinking of Laura He would soon let him know what he thought of it When reminded of Philips present condition he muttered an Irish imprecation on the fever for interfering with his anger and abused the romantic folly that had carried Guy to nurse him at Recoara He was not so much displeased with Laura in fact he thought all young ladies always ready to be fallen in love with and hardly accountable for what their lovers might make them do and he pitied her heartily when he heard of her sitting up all night Anything of extravagance in love met with sympathy from him and there was no effort in his hearty forgiveness of her He vowed that she should give the fellow up and had she been present would have tried to make her do so at a moments warning but in process of time he was convinced that he must not persecute her while Philip was in extremity and though like Charles he scorned the notion of his death and as if it was an additional crime pronounced him to be as strong as a horse he was quite ready to put off all proceedings till his recovery being glad to defer the evil day of making her cry
So when Laura ventured out she met with nothing harsh indeed but for the sorrowful kindness of her family towards her she could hardly have guessed that they knew her secret
Her heart leapt when Amabels letter was silently handed to her and she saw the news of Philips amendment but a sickening feeling succeeded that soon all forbearance would be at an end and he must hear that her weakness had betrayed his secret For the present however nothing was said and she continued in silent dread of what each day might bring forth till one afternoon when the letters had been fetched from Broadstone Mrs Edmonstone with an exclamation of dismay read aloud—
Recoara September 8th
DEAREST MAMMA—Dont be very much frightened when I tell you that Guy has caught the fever He has been ailing since Sunday and yesterday became quite ill but we hope it will not be so severe an illness as Philips was He sleeps a great deal and is in no pain quite sensible when he is awake Arnaud is very useful and so is Anne and he is so quiet at night that he wants no one but Arnaud and will not let me sit up with him Philip is better
Your most affectionate
AFM
The reading was followed by a dead silence then Mr Edmonstone said he had always known how it would be and what would poor Amy do
Mrs Edmonstone was too unhappy to answer for she could see no means of helping them Mr Edmonstone was of no use in a sickroom and she had never thought it possible to leave Charles It did not even occur to her that she could do so till Charles himself suggested that she must go to Amy
Can you spare me said she as if it was a new light
Why not Who can be thought of but Amy She ought not to be a day longer without you
Dr Mayerne would look in on you said she considering and Laura can manage for you
Oh I shall do very well Do you think I could bear to keep you from her
Some one must go said Mrs Edmonstone and even if I could think of letting Laura run the risk this unhappy affair about Philip puts her going out of the question
No one but you can go said Charles it is of no use to talk of anything else
It was settled that if the next account was not more favourable Mr and Mrs Edmonstone should set off for Recoara Laura heard in consternation at the thought of her fathers meeting Philip still weak and unwell without her and perhaps with Guy too ill to be consulted And oh what would Philip think of her Her weakness had disclosed his secret and sunk her beneath him and he must hear it from others She felt as if she could have thrown herself at her mothers feet as she implored her to forbear to spare him to spare her Her mother pitied her incoherent distress but it did not make her feel more in charity with Philip She would not promise that the subject should not be discussed but she tried to reassure Laura by saying that nothing should be done that could retard his recovery
With this Laura was obliged to content herself and early the second morning after the letter arrived she watched the departure of her father and mother
She had expected to find the care of Charles very anxious work but she prospered beyond her hopes He was very kind and considerate and both he and Charlotte were so sobered by anxiety that there was no fear of their spirits overpowering her
Mary Ross used to come almost every afternoon to inquire One day she found Charles alone crutching himself slowly along the terrace and she thought nothing showed the forlorn state of the family so much as to see him out of doors with no one for a prop
Mary Just as I wanted you
What account said she taking the place of one of the crutches
Excellent the fever and drowsiness seem to be going off It must have been a light attack and the elders will hardly come in time for mamma to have any nursing So theres Guy pretty well off ones mind
And Amy
This was such a long letter and so cheerful that she must be all right What I wanted to speak to you about was Laura You know the state of things Well the captain—I wish he was not so sorry it deprives one of the satisfaction of abusing him—the captain it seems was brought to his senses by his illness confessed all to Guy and now has written to tell the whole truth to my father
Has he That is a great relief
Not that I have seen his letter Laura ran away with it and has not said a word of it I know it from one to papa from Amy trying to make the best of it and telling how thoroughly he is cut up She says he all but fainted after writing Fancy that poor little thing with a great man six foot one fainting away on her hands
I thought he was pretty well again
He must be to have written at all and a pretty tolerably bitter pill it must have been to set about it What a thing for him to have had to tell Guy of all people—I do enjoy that So of course Guy takes up his cause and sends a message that is worth anything as showing he is himself better though in any one else it would be a proof of delirium My two brothersinlaw might sit for a picture of the contrast
Then you think Mr Edmonstone will consent
To be sure we shall have him coming home saying—
It is a fine thing to be father inlaw
To a very magnificent threetailed bashaw
He will never hold out against Guy and Amy and Philip will soon set up a patent revolver to be turned by the little god of love on the newest scientific principles
Where is Laura said Mary smiling
I turned her out to walk with Charlotte and I want some counsel as mamma says I know nothing of lovers
Because I know so much
You know feminine nature I want to know what is the best thing to do for Laura Poor thing I cant bear to see her look so wretched worrying herself with care of me I have done the best I could by taking Charlottes lessons and sending her out to mope alone as she likes best but I wish you would tell me how to manage her
I know nothing better for her than waiting on you
Thats hard said Charles that having made the world dance attendance on me for my pleasure I must now do it for theirs But what do you think about telling her of this letter or showing it remembering that not a word about her troubles has passed between us
By all means tell her You must judge about showing it but I should think the opening for talking to her on the subject a great gain
Should you What thinking as I do of the man Should I not be between the horns of a dilemma if I had to speak the honest truth yet not hurt her feelings
She has been so long shut up from sympathy that any proof of kindness must be a comfort
Well I should like to do her some good but it will be a mercy if she does not make me fall foul of Philip I can get up a little Christian charity when my father or Charlotte rave at him but I cant stand hearing him praised I take the opportunity of saying so while I can for I expect he will come home as her betrothed and then we shall not be able to say one word
No I dare say he will be so altered and subdued that you will not be so disposed to rail This confession is a grand thing Goodbye I must get back to church Poor Laura how busy she has been about her sketch there lately
Yes she has been eager about finishing it ever since Guy began to be ill Goodbye Wish me well through my part of confidant tonight It is much against the grain though I would give something to cheer up my poor sister
I am sure you would thought Mary to herself as she looked back at him what a quantity of kind right feeling there in under that odd dry manner that strives to appear to love nothing but a joke
As soon as Charlotte was gone to bed Charles in accordance with his determination said to Laura—
Have you any fancy for seeing Amys letter
Thank you and without speaking Laura took it He forbore to watch her expression as she read When she had finished her face was fixed in silent unhappiness
He has been suffering a great deal I am sure said Charles kindly It was the first voluntary word of compassion towards Philip that Laura had heard and it was as grateful as unexpected Her face softened and tears gushed from her eyes as she said—
You do not know how much There he is grieving for me thinking they will be angry with me and hurting himself with that Oh if this had but come before they set off
Guy and Amy will tell them of his having written
Dear dear Guy and Amy He speaks so earnestly of their kindness I dont fear it so much now he and Guy understand each other
Recollecting her love Charles refrained only saying You can rely on their doing everything to make it better
I can hardly bear to think of what we owe to them said Laura How glad I am that Amy was there after he wrote when he was so much overcome Amy has written me such a very kind note I think you must see that—it is so like her own dear self
She gave it to him and he read—
MY DEAREST—I never could tell you before how we have grieved for you ever since we knew it I am so sorry I wrote such dreadful accounts and Guy says he wants to ask your pardon if he ever said anything that pained you about Philip I understand all your unhappiness now my poor dear but it will be better now it is known Dont be reserved with Charlie pray for if he sees you are unhappy he will be so very kind I have just seen Philip again and found him rested and better He is only anxious about you but I tell him I know you will be glad it is told
Your most affectionate sister
A F M
Laura said Charles finishing the letter Amy gives you very good advice as far as I am concerned I do want to be of as much use to you as I can—I mean as kind
I know—I know thank you said Laura struggling with her tears You have been—you are but—
Ay thought Charles I see she wont be satisfied if my kindness includes her alone What will my honesty let me say to please her Oh I know—You must not expect me to say that Philip has behaved properly Laura nothing but being in love could justify such a delusion but I do say that there is greatness of mind in his confessing it especially at a time when he could put it off and is so unequal to agitation
It was the absence of any tone of satire that made this speech come home to Laura as it was meant There was no grudging in the praise and she answered in a very low broken voice—
You will think so still more when you see this note which he sent open inside mine to be given to papa when I had told my own story Oh his considerateness for me
She gave it to him The address C Edmonstone Esq was a mere scrawl and within the writing was very trembling and weak Charles remarked it and she answered by saying that her own letter began in his own strong hand but failed and grew shaky at the end as if from fatigue and agitation The words were few brief and simple very unlike his usual manner of letterwriting
MY DEAR UNCLE—My conduct has been unjustifiable—I feel it Do not visit it on Laura—I alone should suffer I entreat your pardon and my aunts and leave all to you I will write more at length Be kind to her—Yours affectionately
PH M
Poor Philip said Charles really very much touched From that moment Laura no longer felt completely isolated and deprived of sympathy She sat by Charles till late that night and told him the whole history of her engagement much relieved by the outpouring of her longhidden griefs and comforted by his kindness though he could not absolutely refrain from words and gestures of censure It was as strange that Charles should be the first person to whom Laura told this history as that Guy should have been Philips first confidant
CHAPTER 35
There is a Rock and nigh at hand
A shadow in a weary land
Who in that stricken Rock hath rest
Finds water gushing from its breast
—NEALE
In the meantime the days passed at Recoara without much change for the better or worse After the first week Guys fever had diminished his pulse was lower the drowsiness ceased and it seemed as if there was nothing to prevent absolute recovery But though each morning seemed to bring improvement it never lasted the fever though not high could never be entirely reduced and strength was perceptibly wasting in spite of every means of keeping it up
There was not much positive suffering very little even of headache and he was cheerful though speaking little because he was told not to excite or exhaust himself Languor and lassitude were the chief causes of discomfort and as his strength failed there came fits of exhaustion and oppression that tried him severely At first these were easily removed by stimulants but remedies seemed to lose their effect and the sinking was almost deathlike
I think I could bear acute pain better he said one day and more than once the sigh broke from him almost unconsciously—Oh for one breath of Redclyffe seawind Indeed it seemed as if the close air of the shutinvalley at the end of a long hot day was almost enough to overwhelm him weak as he had become Every morning when Amabel let in the fresh breeze at the window she predicted it would be a cool day and do him good every afternoon the wind abated the sun shone full in the room was stifling the faintness came on and after a few vain attempts at relieving it Guy sighed that there was nothing for it but quiet and Amy was obliged to acquiesce As the sun set the breeze sprung up it became cooler he fell asleep awoke revived was comfortable all the evening and Amy left him at eleven or twelve with hopes of his having a good night
It seemed to her as if ages had passed in this way when one evening two letters were brought in
From mamma said she and this one holding it up is for you It must have been hunting us everywhere How many different directions
From Markham said Guy It must be the letter we were waiting for
The letter to tell them Redclyffe was ready to receive them Amabel put it down with a strange sensation and opened her mothers With a start of joy she exclaimed—
They are coming—mamma and papa
Then all is right
If we do not receive a much better account read Amy we shall set off early on Wednesday and hope to be with you not long after you receive this letter
Oh I am so glad I wonder how Charlie gets on without her
It is a great comfort said Guy
Now you will see what a nurse mamma is
Now you will be properly cared for
How nice it will be She will take care of you all night and never be tired and devise everything I am too stupid for and make you so comfortable
Nay no one could do that better than you Amy But it is joy indeed—to see mamma again—to know you are safe with her Everything comes to make it easy The last words were spoken very low and she did not disturb him by saying anything till he asked about the rest of the letter and desired her to read Markhams to him
This cost her some pain for it had been written in ignorance of even Philips illness and detailed triumphantly the preparations at Redclyffe hinting that they must send timely notice of their return or they would disappoint the tenantry who intended grand doings and concluding with a short lecture on the inexpediency of lingering in foreign parts
Poor Markham said Guy
She understood but these things did not come on her like a shock now for he had been saying them more or less ever since the beginning of his illness and fully occupied as she was she never opened her mind to the future After a long silence Guy said—
I am very sorry for him I have been making Arnaud write to him for me
Oh have you
It was better for you not to do it Arnaud has written for me at night You will send it Amy and another to my poor uncle
Very well said she as he looked at her
I have told Markham said he presently to send you my desk There are all sorts of things in it just as I threw them in when I cleared out my rooms at Oxford I had rather nobody but you saw some of them There is nothing of any importance so you may look at them when you please or not at all
She gazed at him without answering If there had been any struggle to retain him it would have been repressed by his calmness but the thought had not come on her suddenly it was more like an inevitable fate seen at first at a distance and gradually advancing upon her She had never fastened on the hope of his recovery and it had dwindled in an almost imperceptible manner She kept watch over him and followed his thoughts without stretching her mind to suppose herself living without him and was supported by the forgetfulness of self, which gave her no time to realize her feelings
I should like to have seen Redclyffe bay again said Guy after a space Now that mamma is coming that is the one thing I suppose I had set my heart on it for it comes back to me how I reckoned on standing on that rock with you feeling the wind hearing the surge looking at the meeting of earth and sky and the train of sunlight He spoke slowly pausing between each recollection—You will see it some day he added But I must give it up it is earth after all and looking back
Through the evening he seemed to be dwelling on thoughts of his own and only spoke to tell her of some message to friends at Redclyffe or Hollywell to mention little Marianne Dixon or some other charge that he wished to leave She thought he had mentioned almost every one with whom he had had any interchange of kindness at either of his homes even to old nurse at Hollywell remembering them all with quiet pleasure At halfpast eleven he sent her to bed and she went submissively cheered by thinking him likely to sleep
As soon as she could conscientiously call the night over she returned to him and was received with one of the sweet sunny happy looks that had always been his peculiar charm and of late had acquired an expression almost startling from their very beauty and radiance It was hardly to be termed a smile for there was very little if any movement of the lips it was more like the reflection of some glory upon the whole countenance
You have had a good night she said
I have had my wish I have seen Redclyffe then seeing her look startled Of course it was a sort of wandering but I never quite lost the consciousness of being here and it was very delightful I saw the waves each touched with light—the foam—the seabirds floating in shade and light—the trees—the Shag—the sky—oh such a glory as I never knew—themselves—but so intensely glorious
I am glad said Amabel with a strange participation of the delight it had given him
I dont understand such goodness he continued As if it were not enough to look to heaven beyond to have this longing gratified which I thought I ought to conquer Oh Amy is not that being Fatherly
Yes indeed
Now after that and with mammas coming for you will have her if I dont see her I have but one wish unfulfilled
Ah a clergyman
Yes but if that is withheld I must believe it is rightly ordered We must think of that Sunday at Stylehurst and Christmasday and that last time at Munich
Oh I am so glad we stayed at Munich for that
Those were times indeed and many more Yes I have been a great deal too much favoured already and now to be allowed to die just as I should have chosen—
He broke off to take what Amabel was preparing for him and she felt his pulse There was fever still which probably supplied the place of strength for he said he was very comfortable and his eyes were as bright as ever but the beats were weak and fluttering and a thrill crossed her that it might be near but she must attend to him and could not think
When it was time for her to go down to breakfast with Philip Guy said Do you think Philip could come to me today I want much to speak to him
I am sure he could
Then pray ask him to come if it will not tire him very much
Philip had the last two mornings risen in time to breakfast with Amabel in the room adjoining his own he was still very weak and attempted no more than crossing the room and sitting in the balcony to enjoy the evening air He had felt the heat of the weather severely and had been a good deal thrown back by his fatigue and agitation the day he wrote the letter while also anxiety for Guy was retarding his progress though he only heard the best side of his condition Besides all this his repentance both for his conduct with regard to Laura and the hard measure he had dealt to Guy was pressing on him increasingly and the warm feelings hardened and soured by early disappointment regained their force and grew into a love and admiration that made it still more horrible to perceive that he had acted ungenerously towards his cousin
When he heard of Guys desire to see him he was pleased said he was quite able to walk upstairs had been thinking of offering to help her by sitting with him and was very glad to hear he was well enough to wish for a visit She saw she must prepare him for what the conversation was likely to be
He is very anxious to see you she said He is wishing to set all in order And if he does speak about—about dying will you be so kind as not to contradict him
There is no danger cried Philip startling with a sort of agony He is no worse You said the fever was lower
He is rather better I think but he wishes so much to have everything arranged that I am sure it will be better for him to have it off his mind So will you bear it please Philip ended she with an imploring look that reminded him of her childhood
How do you bear it he asked
I dont know—I cant vex him
Philip said no more and only asked when he should come
In an hours time perhaps or whenever he was ready she said for he could rest in the sittingroom before coming in to Guy
He found mounting the stairs harder than he had expected and with aching knees and gasping breath at length reached the sittingroom where Amabel was ready to pity him and made him rest on the sofa till he had fully recovered She then conducted him in and his first glance gave him infinite relief for he saw far less change than was still apparent in himself Guys face was at all times too thin to be capable of losing much of its form and as he was liable to be very much tanned the brown fixed on his face by the sunshine of his journey had not gone off and a slight flush on his cheeks gave him his ordinary colouring his beautiful hazel eyes were more brilliant than ever and though the hand he held out was hot and wasted Philip could not think him nearly as ill as he had been himself and was ready to let him talk as he pleased He was reassured too by his bright smile and the strength of his voice as he spoke a few playful words of welcome and congratulation Amy set a chair and with a look to remind Philip to be cautious glided into her own room leaving the door open so as to see and hear all that passed for they were not fit to be left absolutely alone together
Philip sat down and after a little pause Guy began
There were a few things I wanted to say in case you should be my successor at Redclyffe
A horror came over Philip but he saw Amy writing at her little table and felt obliged to refrain
I dont think of directing you said Guy You will make a far better landlord than I but one or two things I should like
Anything you wish
Old Markham He has oldworld notions and prejudices but his soul is in the family and estate His heart will be half broken for me and if he loses his occupation he will be miserable Will you bear with him and be patient while he lives even if he is cross and absurd in his objections and jealous of all that is not me
Yes—yes—if—
Thank you Then there is Coombe Prior I took Wellwoods pay on myself Will you And I should like him to have the living Then there is the school to be built and I thought of enclosing that bit of waste to make gardens for the people but that youll do much better Well dont you remember when you were at Redclyffe last year Philip winced telling Markham that bit of green by Sallys gate ought to be taken into the park I hope you wont do that for it is the only place the people have to turn out their cows and donkeys And you wont cut them off from the steps from the Cove for it saves the old people from being late for church Thank you As to the rest it is pleasant to think it will be in such hands if—
That if gave Philip some comfort though it did not mean what he fancied He thought of Guys recovery Guy referred to the possibility of Amabels guardianship
Amy has a list of the old people who have had so much a week or their cottages rentfree said Guy If it comes to you you will not let them feel the difference And dont turn off the old keeper Brown he is of no use but it would kill him And Ben Robinson who was so brave in the shipwreck a little notice now and then would keep him straight Will you tell him I hope he will never forget that morningservice after the wreck He may be glad to think of it when he is as I am now You tell him for he will mind more what comes from a man
All this had been spoken with pauses for recollection and for Philips signs of assent Amabel came to give him some cordial and as soon as she had retreated he went on—
My poor uncle I have written—that is caused Arnaud to write to him I hope this may sober him but one great favour I have to ask of you I cant leave him money it would only be a temptation but will you keep an eye on him and let Amy rely on you to tell her when to help him I cant ask any one else and she cannot do it for herself but you would do it well A little kindness might save him and you dont know how generous a character it is run to waste Will you undertake this
To be sure I will
Thank you very much You will judge rightly but he has delicate feelings Yes really and take care you dont run against them
Another silence followed after which Guy said smiling with his natural playfulness One thing more You are the lawyer of the family and I want a legal opinion I have been making Arnaud write my will I have wished Miss Wellwood of St Mildreds to have some money for a sisterhood she wants to establish Now should I leave it to herself or name trustees
Philip heard as if a flash of light was blinding him and he interrupted with an exclamation—
Tell me one thing Was that the thousand pounds
Yes I was not at liberty to—
He stopped for he was unheard At the first word Philip had sunk on his knees hiding his face on the bedclothes in an agony of self-abasement before the goodness he had been relentlessly persecuting
It was that he said in a sort of stifled sob Oh can you forgive me
He could not look up but he felt Guys hand touch his head and heard him say That was done long ago Even as you pardoned my fierce rage against you which I trust is forgiven above It has been repented
As he spoke there was a knock at the door and with the instinctive dread of being found in his present posture Philip sprang to his feet Amabel went to the door and was told that the physician was downstairs with two gentlemen and a card was given her on which she read the name of an English clergyman
There again said Guy Everything comes to me Now it is all quite right
Amabel was to go and speak to them and Guy would see Mr Morris the clergyman as soon as the physician had made his visit You must not go down he then said to Philip You will wait in the sittingroom wont you We shall want you again you know and his calm brightness was a contrast to Philips troubled look All is clear between us now he added as Philip turned away
Long ago letters had been written to Venice begging that if an English clergyman should travel that way he might be told how earnestly his presence was requested this was the first who had answered the summons He was a very young man much out of health and travelling under the care of a brother who was in great dread of his doing anything to injure himself Amabel soon perceived that though kind and rightminded he could not help them except as far as his office was concerned He was very shy only just in priests orders he told her he had never had this office to perform before and seemed almost to expect her to direct him while his brother was so afraid of his overexerting himself that she could not hope he would take charge of Philip
However after the physician had seen Guy she brought Mr Morris to him and came forward or remained in her room according as she was wanted She thought her husbands face was at each moment acquiring more unearthly beauty and feeling with him she was raised above thought or sensation of personal sorrow
When the first part of the service was over and she exchanged a few words out of Guys hearing with Mr Morris he said to her as from the very fullness of his heart One longs to humble oneself to him How it puts one to shame to hear such repentance with such a confession
The time came when Philip was wanted Amabel had called in Anne and the clergymans brother and went to fetch her cousin He was where she had left him in the sittingroom his face hidden in his arms crossed on the table the whole man crushed bowed down overwhelmed with remorse
We are ready Come Philip
I cannot I am not worthy he answered not looking up
Nay you are surely in no uncharitableness with him now said she gently
A shudder expressed his no
And if you are sorry—that is repentance—more fit now than ever—Wont you come Would you grieve him now
You take it on yourself then said Philip almost sharply raising his haggard face
She did not shrink and answered A broken and contrite heart O God Thou wilt not despise
It was a drop of balm a softening drop He rose and trembling from head to foot from the excess of his agitation followed her into Guys room
The rite was over and stillness succeeded the low tones while all knelt in their places Amabel arose first for Guy though serene looked greatly exhausted and as she sprinkled him with vinegar the others stood up Guy looked for Philip and held out his hand Whether it was his gentle force or of Philips own accord Amabel could not tell but as he lay with that look of perfect peace and love Philip bent down over him and kissed his forehead
Thank you he faintly whispered Good night God bless you and my sister
Philip went and he added to Amy Poor fellow It will be worse for him than for you You must take care of him
She hardly heard the last words for his head sunk on one side in a deathlike faintness the room was cleared of all but herself and Anne fetched the physician at once
At length it passed off and Guy slept The doctor felt his pulse and she asked his opinion of it Very low and unequal she was told his strength was failing and there seemed to be no power of rallying it but they must do their best to support him with cordials according to the state of his pulse The physician could not remain all night himself but would come as soon as he could on the following day
Amabel hardly knew when it was that he went away the two Mr Morrises went to the other hotel and she made her evening visit to Philip It was all like a dream which she could afterwards scarcely remember till night had come on and for the first time she found herself allowed to keep watch over her husband
He had slept quietly for some time when she roused him to give him some wine as she was desired to do constantly He smiled and said Is no one here but you
No one
My own sweet wife my Verena as you have always been We have been very happy together
Indeed we have said she a look of suffering crossing her face as she thought of their unclouded happiness It will not be so long before we meet again
A few months perhaps—said Amabel in a stifled voice like your mother—
No dont wish that Amy You would not wish it to have no mother
You will pray— She could say no more but struggled for calmness
Yes he answered I trust you to it and to mamma for comfort And Charlie—I shall not rob him any longer I only borrowed you for a little while he added smiling In a little while we shall meet Years and months seem alike now I am sorry to cause you so much grief my Amy but it is all as it should be and we have been very happy
Amy listened her eyes intently fixed on him unable to repress her agitation except by silence After some little time he spoke again My love to Charlie—and Laura—and Charlotte my brother and sisters How kindly they have made me one of them I need not ask Charlotte to take care of Bustle and your father will ride Deloraine My love to him and earnest thanks for you above all Amy And dear mamma I must look now to meeting her in a brighter world but tell her how I have felt all her kindness since I first came in my strangeness and grief How kind she was how she helped me and led me and made me know what a mother was Amy it will not hurt you to hear it was your likeness to her that first taught me to love you I have been so very happy I dont understand it
He was again silent as in contemplation and Amabels overcoming emotion had been calmed and chastened down again now that it was no longer herself that was spoken of Both were still and he seemed to sleep a little When next he spoke it was to ask if she could repeat their old favourite lines in Sintram They came to her lips and she repeated them in a low steady voice
When death is coming near
And thy heart shrinks in fear
And thy limbs fail
Then raise thy hands and pray
To Him who smooths the way
Through the dark vale
Seest thou the eastern dawn
Hearst thou in the red morn
The angels song
Oh lift thy drooping head
Thou who in gloom and dread
Hast lain so long
Death comes to set thee free
Oh meet him cheerily
As thy true friend
And all thy fears shall cease
And In eternal peace
Thy penance end
In eternal peace repeated Guy I did not think it would have been so soon I cant think where the battle has been I never thought my life could be so bright It was a foolish longing when first I was ill for the cool waves of Redclyffe bay and that shipwreck excitement if I was to die This is far better Read me a psalm Amy Out of the deep
There was something in his perfect happiness that would not let her grieve though a dull heavy sense of consternation was growing on her So it went on through the night—not a long nor a dreary one—but more like a dream He dozed and woke said a few tranquil words and listened to some prayer psalm or verse then slept again apparently without suffering except when he tried to take the cordials and this he did with such increasing difficulty that she hardly knew how to bear to cause him so much pain though it was the last lingering hope He strove to swallow them each time with the mechanical Thank you so affecting when thus spoken but at last he came to It is of no use I cannot
Then she knew all hope was gone and sat still watching him The darkness lessened and twilight came He slept but his breath grew short and unequal and as she wiped the moisture on his brow she knew it was the deathdamp
Morning light came on—the church bell rang out matins—the white hills were tipped with rosy light His pulse was almost gone—his hand was cold At last he opened his eyes Amy he said as if bewildered or in pain
Here dearest
I dont see
At that moment the sun was rising and the light streamed in at the open window and over the bed but it was another dawn than ours that he beheld as his most beautiful of all smiles beamed over his face and he said Glory in the Highest—peace—goodwill—A struggle for breath gave an instants look of pain then he whispered so that she could but just hear—The last prayer She read the Commendatory Prayer She knew not the exact moment but even as she said Amen she perceived it was over The soul was with Him with whom dwell the spirits of just men made perfect and there lay the earthly part with a smile on the face She closed the dark fringed eyelids—saw him look more beautiful than in sleep—then laying her face down on the bed she knelt on She took no heed of time no heed of aught that was earthly How long she knelt she never knew but she was roused by Annes voice in a frightened sob—My lady my lady—come away Oh Miss Amabel you should not be here
She lifted her head and Anne afterwards told Mary Ross she should never forget how my lady looked It was not grief it was as if she had been a little way with her husband and was just called back
She rose—looked at his face again—saw Arnaud was at hand—let Anne lead her into the next room and shut the door
CHAPTER 36
The matron who alone has stood
When not a prop seemed left below
The first lorn hour of widowhood
Yet cheered and cheering all the while
With sad but unaffected smile
—CHRISTIAN YEAR
The four months wife was a widow before she was twentyone and there she sat in her loneliness her maid weeping seeking in vain for something to say that might comfort her and struck with fear at seeing her thus composed It might be said that she had not yet realized her situation but the truth was perhaps that she was in the midst of the true realities She felt that her Guy was perfectly happy—happy beyond thought or comparison—and she was so accustomed to rejoice with him that her mind had not yet opened to understand that his joy left her mourning and desolate
Thus she remained motionless for some minutes till she was startled by a sound of weeping—those fearful overpowering sobs so terrible in a strong man forced to give way
Philip thought she and withal Guys words returned—It will be worse for him than for you Take care of him
I must go to him said she at once
She took up a purple prayerbook that she had unconsciously brought in her hand from Guys bed and walked downstairs without pausing to think what she should say or do or remembering how she would naturally have shrunk from the sight of violent grief
Philip had retired to his own room the night before overwhelmed by the first full view of the extent of the injuries he had inflicted the first perception that pride and malevolence had been the true source of his prejudice and misconceptions and for the first time conscious of the longfostered conceit that had been his bane from boyhood All had flashed on him with the discovery of the true purpose of the demand which he thought had justified his persecution He saw the glory of Guys character and the part he had acted—the scales of self-admiration fell from his eyes and he knew both himself and his cousin
His sole comfort was in hope for the future and in devising how his brotherly affection should for the rest of his life testify his altered mind and atone for past illwill This alone kept him from being completely crushed—for he by no means imagined how near the end was and the physician willing to spare himself pain left him in hopes though knowing how it would be He slept but little and was very languid in the morning but he rose as soon as Arnaud came to him in order not to occupy Arnauds time as well as to be ready in case Guy should send for him again auguring well from hearing that there was nothing stirring above hoping this was a sign that Guy was asleep So hoped the two servants for a long time but at length growing alarmed after many consultations they resolved to knock at the door and learn what was the state of things
Philip likewise was full of anxiety and coming to his room door to listen for intelligence it was the e morto of the passing Italians that first revealed to him the truth Guy dead Amy widowed himself the cause—he who had said he would never be answerable for the death of this young man
Truly had Guys threat that he would make him repent been fulfilled He tottered back to his couch and sank down in a burst of anguish that swept away all the self-control that had once been his pride There Amabel found him stretched face downwards quivering and convulsed by frightful sobs
Dont—dont Philip said she in her gentle voice Dont cry so terribly
Without looking up he made a gesture with his hand as if to drive her away Dont come here to reproach me he muttered
No no dont speak so I want you to hear me I have something for you from him If you would only listen I want to tell you how happy and comfortable it was She took a chair and sat down by him relieved on perceiving that the sobs grew a little less violent
It was very peaceful very happy repeated she We ought to be very glad
He turned round and glanced at her for a moment but he could not bear to see her quiet face You dont know what you say he gasped No take care of yourself dont trouble yourself for such as me
I must he desired me said Amabel You will be happier indeed Philip if you would only think what glory it is and that he is all safe and has won the victory and will have no more of those hard hard struggles and bitter repentance It has been such a night that it seems wrong to be sorry
Did you say he spoke of me again
Yes here is his Prayerbook Your father gave it to him and he meant to have told you about it himself only he could not talk yesterday evening and could not part with it till—
Amy broke off by opening the worn purple cover and showing the name in the Archdeacons writing Hes very fond of it she said it is the one he always uses Alas she had not learnt to speak of him in the past tense
Philip held out his hand but the agony of grief returned the next moment My father my father He would have done him justice If he had lived this would never have been
That is over you do him justice now said Amy You did indeed you did make him quite happy He said so again and again I never saw him so happy as when you began to get better I dont think any one ever had so much happiness and it never ceased it was all quiet and peace and joy till it brightened quite into perfect day—and the angels song Dont you remember yesterday how clear and sweet his voice came out in that and it was the last thing almost he said I believe—she lowered her voice—I believe he finished it among them
The earnest placid voice speaking thus in calmness and simplicity could not fail in soothing him but he was so shaken and exhausted that she had great difficulty in restoring him After a time he lay perfectly still on the sofa and she was sitting by relieved by the tranquillity when there was a knock at the door and Arnaud came in and stood hesitating as if he hardly knew how to begin The present fear of agitating her charge helped her now when obliged to turn her thoughts to the subjects on which she knew Arnaud was come She went to the door and spoke low hoping her cousin might not hear or understand
How soon must it be
My lady tomorrow said Arnaud looking down They say that so it must be and the priest consents to have it in the churchyard here The brother of the clergyman is here and would know if your ladyship would wish—
I will speak to him said Amabel reluctant to send such messages through servants
Let me said Philip who understood what was going on and was of course impelled to spare her as much as possible
Thank you said she if you are able
Oh yes Ill go at once
Stop said she as he was setting forth you dont know what you are going to say
He put his hand to his head in confusion
He wished to be buried here said Amabel and—
But this renewal of the assurance of the death was too much and covering his face with his hands he sank back in another paroxysm of violent sobs Amabel could not leave him
Ask Mr Morris to be so good as to wait and I will come directly said she then returned to her task of comfort till she again saw Philip lying with suspended faculties in the repose of complete exhaustion
She then went to Mr Morris with a look and tone of composure that almost startled him thanking him for his assistance in the arrangements The funeral was to be at sunrise the next day before the villagers began to keep the feast of St Michael and the rest was to be settled by Arnaud and Mr Morris He then said somewhat reluctantly that his brother had desired to know whether Lady Morville wished to see him today and begged to be sent for but Amy plainly perceived that he thought it very undesirable for his brother to have any duties to perform today She questioned herself whether she might not ask him to read to her and whether it might be better for Philip but she thought she ought not to ask what might injure him merely for her own comfort and besides Philip was entirely incapable of self-command and it would not be acting fairly to expose him to the chance of discovering to a stranger feelings that he would ordinarily guard so scrupulously
She therefore gratefully refused the offer and Mr Morris very nearly thanked her for doing so He took his leave and she knew she must return to her post but first she indulged herself with one brief visit to the room where all her cares and duties had lately centred A look—a thought—a prayer The beauteous expression there fixed was a help as it had ever been in life and she went back again cheered and sustained
Throughout that day she attended on her cousin whose bodily indisposition required as much care as his mind needed soothing She talked to him read to him tried to set him the example of taking food took thought for him as if he was the chief sufferer as if it was the natural thing for her to do working in the strength her husband had left her and for him who had been his chief object of care She had no time to herself except the few moments that she allowed herself now and then to spend in gazing at the dear face that was still her comfort and joy until at last late in the evening she succeeded in reading Philip to sleep Then as she sat in the dim candlelight with everything in silence a sense of desolation came upon her and she knew that she was alone
At that moment a carriage thundered at the door and she remembered for the first time that she was expecting her father and mother She softly left the room and closed the door and finding Anne in the nest room sent her down
Meet mamma Anne said she tell her I am quite well Bring them here
They entered and there stood Amabel her face a little flushed just like only calmer the daughter they had parted with on her bridal day four months ago She held up her hand as a sign of silence and said— Hush dont wake Philip
Mr Edmonstone was almost angry and actually began an impatient exclamation but broke it off with a sob caught her in his arms kissed her and then buried his face in his handkerchief Mrs Edmonstone still aghast at the tidings they had met at Vicenza and alarmed at her unnatural composure embraced her held her for some moments then looked anxiously to see her weep But there was not a tear and her voice was itself though low and weak as while her father began pacing up and down she repeated—
Pray dont papa Philip has been so ill all day
Philip—pshaw said Mr Edmonstone hastily How are you yourself my poor darling
Quite well thank you said Amy There is a room ready for you
Mrs Edmonstone was extremely alarmed sure that this was a grief too deep for outward tokens and had no peace till she had made Amabel consent to come up with her and go at once to bed To this she agreed after she had rung for Arnaud and stood with him in the corridor to desire him to go at once to Captain Morville as softly as he could and when he waked to say Mr and Mrs Edmonstone were come but she thought he had better not see them tonight to tell him from her that she wished him good night and hoped he would sleep quietly And Arnaud take care you do not let him know the hour tomorrow Perhaps as he is so tired he may sleep till afterwards
Mrs Edmonstone was very impatient of this colloquy and glad when Amabel ended it and led the way upstairs She entered her little room then quietly opened another door and Mrs Edmonstone found herself standing by the bed where that which was mortal lay with its face bright with the impress of immortality
The shock was great for he was indeed as a son to her but her fears for Amabel would not leave room for any other thought
Is not he beautiful said Amy with a smile like his own
My dear my dear you ought not to be here said Mrs Edmonstone trying to lead her away
If you would let me say my prayers here said she submissively
I think not I dont know how to refuse if it would be a comfort said Mrs Edmonstone much distressed but I cant think it right The danger is greater after And surely my poor dear child you have a reason for not risking yourself
Go mamma I ought not to have brought you here I forgot about infection said Amabel with the tranquillity which her mother had hoped to shake by her allusion I am coming
She took up Guys watch and a book from the table by the bedside and came back to her sleepingroom She wound up the watch and then allowed her mother to undress her answering all her inquiries about her health in a gentle indifferent matterof-fact way She said little of Guy but that little was without agitation and in due time she lay down in bed Still whenever Mrs Edmonstone looked at her there was no sleep in her eyes and at last she persuaded her to leave her on the plea that being watched made her more wakeful as she did not like to see mamma sitting up
Almost as soon as it was light Mrs Edmonstone returned and was positively frightened for there stood Amabel dressed in her white muslin her white bonnet and her deep lace weddingveil All her glossy hair was hidden away and her face was placid as ever though there was a red spot on each cheek She saw her mothers alarm and reassured her by speaking calmly
You know I have nothing else but colours I should like to wear this if you will let me
But dearest you must not—cannot go
It is very near We often walked there together I would not if I thought it would hurt me but I wish it very much indeed At home by Michaelmas
Mrs Edmonstone yielded though her mind misgave her comforted by hoping for the muchdesired tears But Amabel who used to cry so easily for a trifle had now not a tear Her grief was as yet too deep or perhaps more truly sorrow and mourning had not begun while the influence of her husbands spirit was about her still
It was time to set forth and the small party of mourners met in the long corridor Mr Edmonstone would have given his daughter his arm but she said—
I beg your pardon dear papa I dont think I can and she walked alone and firmly
It was a strange sight that English funeral so far from England The bearers were Italian peasants There was a sheet thrown over the coffin instead of a pall and this with the white dress of the young widow gave the effect of the emblematic whiteness of a childs funeral and the impression was heightened by the floating curling white clouds of vapour rising in strange shrouded shadowy forms like spirit mourners from the narrow ravines round the graveyard and the snowy mountains shining in the morning light against the sky
Gliding almost like one of those white wreaths of mist Amabel walked alone tearless and calm her head bent down and her long veil falling round her in full light folds as when it had caught the purple light on her weddingday Her parents were close behind weeping more for the living than the dead though Guy had a fast hold of their hearts and his own mother could scarce have loved him better than Mrs Edmonstone did Lastly were Anne and Arnaud sincere mourners especially Arnaud who had loved and cherished his young master from childhood
They went to the strangers corner of the graveyard for of course the church did not open to a member of another communion of the visible church but around them were the hills in which he had read many a meaning and which had echoed a response to his last chant with the promise of the blessing of peace
The blessing of peace came in the precious English burialservice as they laid him to rest in the earth beneath the spreading chestnuttree rendered a home by those words of his Mother Church—the mother who had guided each of his steps in his orphaned life It was a distant grave far from his home and kindred but in a hallowed spot and a most fair one and there might his mortal frame meetly rest till the day when he should rise while from their ancestral tombs should likewise awaken the forefathers whose sins were indeed visited on him in his early death but thanks to Him who giveth the victory in death without the sting
Amabel in obedience to a sign from her mother sat on a root of the tree while the Lesson was read and afterwards she moved forward and stood at the edge of the grave her hands tightly clasped and her head somewhat raised as if her spirit was following her husband to his repose above rather than to his earthly restingplace
The service was ended and she was taking a last long gaze while her mother in the utmost anxiety was striving to make up her mind to draw her away when suddenly a tall gaunt figure was among them—his face ghastly pale and full of despair and bewilderment—his step uncertain—his dress disordered
Amabel turned went up to him laid her hand on his arm and said softly and quietly looking up in his face It is over now Philip you had better come home
Not attempting to withstand her he obeyed as if it was his only instinct It was like some vision of a guiding succouring spirit as she moved on slowly gliding in her white draperies Mrs Edmonstone watched her in unspeakable awe and amazement almost overpowering her anxieties It seemed as impossible that the one should be Amy as that the other should be Philip her gentle little clinging daughter or her proud imperturbable selfreliant nephew
But it was Amys own face when they entered the corridor and she turned back her veil showing her flushed and heated cheeks at the same time opening Philips door and saying Now you must rest for you ought not to have come out Lie down and let mamma read to you
Mrs Edmonstone was reluctant but Amy looked up earnestly and said Yes dear mamma I should like to be alone a little while
She then conducted her father to the sittingroom upstairs
I will give you the papers she said and leaving him returned immediately
This is his will she said You will tell me if there is anything I must do at once Here is a letter to Mr Markham and another to Mr Dixon if you will be so kind as to write and enclose them Thank you dear papa
She drew a blottingbook towards him saw that there was ink and pen and left him too much appalled at her ways to say anything
His task was less hard than the one she had set her mother Strong excitement had carried Philip to the graveyard as soon as he learnt what was passing He could hardly return even with Arnauds support and he had only just reached the sofa before he fell into a faintingfit
It was long before he gave any sign of returning life and when he opened his eyes and saw Mrs Edmonstone he closed them almost immediately as if unable to meet her look It was easier to treat him in his swoon than afterwards She knew nothing of his repentance and confession she only knew he had abused her confidence led Laura to act insincerely and been the cause of Guys death She did not know how bitterly he accused himself and though she could not but see he was miserable she could by no means fathom his wretchedness nor guess that her very presence made him conscious how far he was fallen He was so ill that she could not manifest her displeasure nor show anything but solicitude for his relief but her kindness was entirely to his condition not to himself and perceiving this while he thought his confession had been received greatly aggravated his distress though he owned within himself that he well deserved it
She found that he was in no state for being read to he was completely exhausted and suffering from violent headache So when she could conscientiously say that to be left quiet was the best thing for him she went to her daughter
Amabel was lying on her bed her Bible open by her not exactly reading but as if she was now and then finding a verse and dwelling on it Gentle and serene she looked but would she never weep would those quiet blue eyes be always sleepless and tearless
She asked anxiously for Philip and throughout the day he seemed to be her care She did not try to get up and go to him but she was continually begging her mother to see about him It was a harassing day for poor Mrs Edmonstone She would have been glad to have sat by Amabel all the time writing to Charles or hearing her talk Amy had much to say for she wished to make her mother share the perfect peace and thankfulness that had been breathed upon her during those last hours with her husband and she liked to tell the circumstances of his illness and his precious sayings to one who would treasure them almost like herself She spoke with her face turned away so as not to see her mothers tears but her mild voice unwavering as if secure in the happiness of these recollections This was the only comfort of Mrs Edmonstones day but when she heard her husbands boots creaking in the corridor it was a sure sign that he was in some perplexity and that she must go and help him to write a letter or make some arrangement Philip too needed attention but excellent nurse as Mrs Edmonstone was she only made him worse The more he felt she was his kind aunt still the more he saw how he had wounded her and that her pardon was an effort The fond spontaneous unreserved affection—almost petting—which he had wellnigh dared to contemn was gone her manner was only that of a considerate nurse Much as he longed for a word of Laura he did not dare to lead to it—indeed he was so far from speaking to her of any subject which touched him that he did not presume even to inquire for Amabel he only heard of her through Arnaud
At night sheer exhaustion worked its own cure he slept soundly and awoke in the morning revived He heard from Arnaud that Lady Morville was pretty well but had not slept and presently Mrs Edmonstone came in and took pains to make him comfortable but with an involuntary dryness of manner She told him his uncle would come to see him as soon as he was up if he felt equal to talking over some business Philips brain reeled with dismay and consternation for it flashed on him that he was heir of Redclyffe He must profit by the death he had caused he had slain and he must take possession of the lands which with loathing and horror he remembered that he had almost coveted Nothing more was wanting There was little consolation in remembering that the inheritance would clear away all difficulties in the way of his marriage He had sinned wealth did not alter his fault and his spirit could not brook that if spurned in poverty he should be received for his riches He honoured his aunt for being cold and reserved and could not bear the idea of seeing his uncle ready to meet him halfway
After the first shock he became anxious to have the meeting over know the worst and hear on what ground he stood with Laura As soon as he was dressed he sent a message to announce that he was ready and lay on the sofa awaiting his uncles arrival as patiently as he could Mr Edmonstone meantime was screwing up his courage—not that he meant to say a word of Laura—Philip was too unwell to be told his opinion of him but now he had ceased to rely on his nephew he began to dread him and his overbearing ways and besides he had a perfect horror of witnessing agitation
At last he came and Philip rose to meet him with a feeling of shame and inferiority most new to him
Dont dont I beg said Mr Edmonstone with what was meant for dignity Lie still you had much better My stars how ill you look he exclaimed startled by Philips altered face and figure You have had a sharpish touch but you are better eh
Yes thank you
Well I thought I had better come and speak to you if you felt up to it Here is—here is—I hope it is all right and legal but that you can tell better than I and you are concerned in it anyhow Here is poor Guys will which we thought you had better look over if you liked and felt equal eh
Thank you said Philip holding out his hand but Mr Edmonstone withheld it trying his patience by an endless quantity of discursive halfsentences apparently without connection with each other about disappointment and hopes and being sorry and prospects and its being an unpleasant thing and best not raise his expectations during all which time Philip expecting to hear of Laura and his heart beating so fast as to renew the sensation of faintness waited in vain and strove to gather the meaning and find out whether he was forgiven almost doubting whether the confusion was in his own mind or in his uncles words However at last the meaning bolted out in one comprehensive sentence when Mr Edmonstone thought he had sufficiently prepared him for his disappointment—Poor Amy is to be confined in the spring
There Mr Edmonstone stopped short very much afraid of the effect but Philip raised himself his face brightened as if he was greatly relieved and from his heart he exclaimed Thank Heaven
Thats right that is very well said answered Mr Edmonstone very much pleased It would be a pity it should go out of the old line after all and its a very generous thing in you to say so
Oh no said Philip shrinking into himself at even such praise as this
Well well said his uncle you will see he has thought of you be it how it may There I only hope it is right though it does seem rather queer appointing poor little Amy executor rather than me If I had but been here in time But twas Heavens will and so—It does not signify after all if it is not quite formal We understand each other
The will was on a sheet of letterpaper in Arnauds stiff French handwriting it was witnessed by the two Mr Morrises and signed on the 27th of September in very frail and feeble characters Amabel and Markham were the executors and Amabel was to be sole guardian in case of the birth of a child If it was a son £1OOOO was left to Philip himself if not he was to have all the plate furniture c of Redclyffe with the exception of whatever Lady Morville might choose for herself
Philip scarcely regarded the legacy though it smoothed away his chief difficulties as more than another of those illrequited benefits which were weighing him to the earth He read on to a sentence which reproached him so acutely that he would willingly have hidden from it as he had done from Guys countenance It was the bequest of £5000 to Elizabeth Wellwood Sebastian Dixons debts were to be paid off £1000 was left to Marianne Dixon and the rest of the personal property was to be Amabels
He gave back the paper with only the words Thank you He did not feel as if it was for him to speak and Mr Edmonstone hesitated made an attempt at congratulating him broke down and asked if it was properly drawn up He glanced at the beginning and end said it was quite correct and laid his head down as if the examination had been a great deal of trouble
And what do you think of Amys being under age fidgeted on Mr Edmonstone How is she to act poor dear Shall I act for her
She will soon be of age said Philip wearily
In January poor darling Who would have thought how it would have been with her I little thought last May—but holloa what have I been at cried he jumping up in a great fright as Philip so weak as to be overcome by the least agitation changed countenance covered his face with his hands and turned away with a suppressed sob I didnt mean it I am sure Here mamma
No no said Philip recovering and sitting up dont call her I beg There is nothing the matter
Mr Edmonstone obeyed but he was too much afraid of causing a renewal of agitation to continue the conversation and after walking about the room a little while and shaking it more than Philip could well bear he went away to write his letters
In the meantime Amabel had been spending her morning in the same quiet way as the former day She wrote part of a letter to Laura and walked to the graveyard rather against her mothers wish but she was so good and obedient it was impossible to thwart her though Mrs Edmonstone was surprised at her proposal to join her father and Philip at tea Do you like it my dear
He told me to take care of him said Amabel
I cannot feel that he deserves you should worry yourself about him said Mrs Edmonstone If you knew all—
I do know all mamma—if you mean about Laura Surely you must forgive Think how he repents What have you not had his letter Then how did you know
I learned it from Laura herself Her trouble at his illness revealed it Do you say he has written
Yes mamma he told Guy all about it and was very sorry and wrote as soon as he was able Guy sent you a long message He was so anxious about it
Amabel showed more eagerness to understand the state of the case than she had about anything else She urged that Philip should be spoken to as soon as possible saying the suspense must be grievous and dwelling on his repentance Mrs Edmonstone promised to speak to papa and this satisfied her but she held her resolution of meeting Philip that evening looking on him as a charge left her by her husband and conscious that as she alone understood how deep was his sorrow she could make the time spent with her parents less embarrassing
Her presence always soothed him and regard for her kept her father quiet so that the evening passed off very well Mrs Edmonstone waited on both and in Amys presence was better able to resume her usual manner towards her nephew and he sat wondering at the placidity of Amys pale face Her hair was smoothed back and she wore a cap—the loss of her long shady curls helping to mark the change from the bright days of her girlhood but the mournfulness of her countenance did not mar the purity and serenity that had always been its great characteristic and in the faint sweet smile with which she received a kind word or attention there was a likeness to that peculiar and beautiful expression of her husbands so as in spite of the great difference of feature and colouring to give her a resemblance to him
All this day had been spent by Mr Edmonstone in a fret to get away from Recoara and his wife was hardly less desirous to leave it than himself for she could have no peace or comfort about Amabel till she had her safely at home Still she dreaded proposing the departure and even more the departure itself; and, in spite of Mr Edmonstones impatience she let her alone till she had her mourning but when after two days of hard work Anne had nearly managed to complete it she made up her mind to tell her daughter that they ought to set out
Amabel replied by mentioning Philip She deemed him a sort of trust and had been reposing in the thought of making him a reason for lingering in the scene where the brightness of her life had departed from her Mrs Edmonstone would not allow that she ought to remain for his sake and told her it was her duty to resolve to leave the place She said Yes but for him and it ended in Mrs Edmonstone going without telling her to inform him that she thought Amy ought to be at home as soon as possible but that it was difficult to prevail on her because she thought him as yet not well enough to be left He was of course shocked at being thus considered and as soon as he next saw Amabel told her with great earnestness that he could not bear to see her remaining there on his account that he was almost well and meant to leave Recoara very soon the journey was very easy the sea voyage would be the best thing for him and he should be glad to get to the regimental doctor at Corfu
Amabel sighed and knew she ought to be convinced The very pain it gave her to lose sight of that green grave the chestnuttree and the white mountain to leave the rooms and passages which still to her ears were haunted by Guys hushed step and voice and to part with the window where she used each wakeful night to retrace his profile as he had stood pausing before telling her of his exceeding happiness that very pain made her think that opposition would be selfish She must go some time or other and it was foolish to defer the struggle she must not detain her parents in an infected place nor keep her mother from Charles She therefore consented and let them do what they pleased—only insisting on Arnauds being left with Philip
Philip did not think this necessary but yielded when she urged it as a relief to her own mind and Arnaud though unwilling and used to his own way could make no objection when she asked it as a personal favour Arnaud was at his own earnest wish to continue in her service and as soon as Philip was able to embark was to follow her to Hollywell
All this time nothing passed about Laura Amabel asked several times whether papa had spoken but was always answered Not yet and at last Mrs Edmonstone after vainly trying to persuade him was obliged to give it up The truth was he could not begin he was afraid of his nephew and so unused to assume superiority over him that he did not know what to do and found all kinds of reasons for avoiding the embarrassing scene Since Philip still must be dealt with cautiously better not enter on the subject at all When reminded that the suspense was worse than anything he said no one could tell how things would turn out and grew angry with his wife for wishing him to make up a shameful affair like that when poor Guy had not been dead a week and he had been the death of him but it was just like mamma she always spoilt him He had a great mind to vow never to consent to his daughters marrying such an overbearing pragmatical fellow she ought to be ashamed of even thinking of him when he was no better than her brothers murderer
After this tirade Mrs Edmonstone might well feel obliged to tell Amabel that papa must not be pressed any further and of course if he would not speak she could not nor did she wish it
Then mamma said Amabel with the air of decision that had lately grown on her I must tell him I beg your pardon she added imploringly but indeed I must It is hard on him not to hear that you had not his letter and that Laura has told I know Guy would wish me so dont be displeased dear mamma
I cant be displeased with anything you do
And you give me leave
To be sure I do—leave to do anything but hurt yourself
And would it be wrong for me to offer to write to him No one else will and it will be sad for him not to hear It cannot be wrong can it said she as the fingers of her right hand squeezed her weddingring a habit she had taken up of late
Certainly not my poor darling Do just as you think fit I am sorry for him for I am sure he is in great trouble and I should like him to be comforted—if he can But Amy you must not ask me to do it He has disappointed me too much
Mrs Edmonstone left the room in tears
Amabel went up to the window looked long at the chestnuttree then up into the sky sat down and leant her forehead on her hand in meditation until she rose up cheered and sustained as if she had been holding council with her husband
She did not overestimate Philips sufferings from suspense and anxiety He had not heard a word of Laura how she had borne his illness nor how much displeasure his confession had brought upon her nor could he learn what hope there was that his repentance was accepted He did not venture to ask for after engaging to leave all to them could he intrude his own concerns on them at such a time It was but a twelvemonth since he had saddened and shadowed Guys short life and love with the very suffering from uncertainty that he found so hard to bear As he remembered this he had a sort of fierce satisfaction in enduring this retributive justice though there were moods when he felt the torture so acutely that it seemed to him as if his brain would turn if he saw them depart and was left behind to this distracting doubt
The day had come on which they were to take their first stage as far as Vicenza and his last hopes were fading He tried to lose the sense of misery by bestirring himself in the preparations but he was too weak and Mrs Edmonstone insisting on his attempting no more sent him back to his own sittingroom
Presently there was a knock and in came Amabel dressed for the first time in her weeds the blackness and width of her sweeping crape making her young face look smaller and paler while she held in her hand some leaves of chestnut that showed where she had been She smiled a little as she came in saying I am come to you for a little quiet out of the bustle of packing up I want you to do something for me
Anything for you
It is what you will like to do said she with that smile for it is more for him than for me Could you without teasing yourself put that into Latin for me by and by I think it should be in Latin as it is in a foreign country
She gave him a paper in her own writing
GUY MORVILLE OF REDCLYFFE ENGLAND DIED THE EVE OF ST MICHAEL AND ALL ANGELS 18—AGED 21 12 I BELIEVE IN THE COMMUNION OF SAINTS
Will you be so kind as to give it to Arnaud when it is done she continued he will send it to the man who is making the cross I think the kind people here will respect it
Yes said Philip it is soon done and thank you for letting me do it But Amy I would not alter your choice yet there is one that seems to me more applicable Greater love hath no man—
I know what you mean said Amy but that has so high a meaning that he could not bear it to be applied to him
Or rather what right have I to quote it said Philip bitterly His friend No Amy you should rather choose If thine enemy thirst give him drink for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head I am sure they are burning on mine and he pressed his hand on his forehead
Dont say such things We both know that at the worst of times he looked on you as a sincere friend
Philip groaned and she thought it best to go on to something else I like this best she said It will be nice to think of far away I should like too for these Italians to see the stranger has the same creed as themselves
After a moments pause during which he looked at the paper he said Amy I have one thing to ask of you Will you write my name in the Prayerbook
That I will said she and Philip drew it from under the sofa cushion and began putting together his pocket gold pen While he was doing this she said Will you write to me sometimes I shall be so anxious to know how you get on
Yes thank you said he with a sigh as if he would fain have said more
She paused then said abruptly Do you know they never had your letter
Ha Good heavens cried he starting up in consternation then they dont know it
They do Sit down Philip and hear I wanted to tell you about it They know it Poor Laura was so unhappy when you were ill that mamma made it out from her
He obeyed the hand that invited him back to his seat and turned his face earnestly towards her He must let her be his comforter though a moment before his mind would have revolted at troubling the newlymade widow with his love affairs Amabel told him as fully and clearly as she could how the truth had come out how gently Laura had been dealt with how Charles had been trying to soften his father and papa had not said one angry word to her
They forgive her Oh Amy thanks indeed You have taken away one of the heaviest burdens I am glad indeed that she spoke first For my own part I see through all their kindness and consideration how they regard me
They know how sorry you are and that you wrote to tell all said Amabel They forgive indeed they do but they cannot bear to speak about it just yet
If you forgive Amy said he in a husky voice I may hope for pardon from any
Hush dont say that You have been so kind all this time and we have felt together so much that no one could help forgetting anything that went before Then you will write to me and will you tell me how to direct to you
You will write to me cried Philip brightening for a moment with glad surprise Oh Amy you will quite overpower me with your goodness—The coals of fire he finished sinking his voice and again pressing his hand to his brow
You must not speak so Philip then looking at him Is your head aching
Not so much aching as— he paused and exclaimed as if carried away in spite of himself almost bursting with the thoughts of—of you Amy—of him whom I knew too late—wilfully misunderstood envied persecuted who—oh Amy Amy if you could guess at the anguish of but one of my thoughts you would know what the first murderer meant when he said My punishment is greater than I can bear
I cant say dont think said Amy in her sweet calm tone for I have seen how happy repentance made him but I know it must be dreadful I suppose the worse it is at the time the better it must be afterwards And I am sure this Prayerbook—she had her hand on it all the time as if it was a pleasure to her to touch it again—must be a comfort to you Did you not see that he made me give it to you to use that day when if ever there was pardon and peace—
I remember said Philip in a low grave heartfelt tone and as she took the pen and was writing his name below the old inscription he added And the date Amy and—yes as he saw her write From G M—but put from A F M too Thank you One thing more he hesitated and spoke very low You must write in it what you said when you came to fetch me that day—A broken—
As she finished writing Mrs Edmonstone came in My Amy all is ready We must go Goodbye Philip said she in the tone of one so eager for departure as to fancy farewells would hasten it However she was not more eager than Mr Edmonstone who rushed in to hurry them on shaking hands cordially with Philip and telling him to make haste and recover his good looks Amabel held out her hand She would fain have said something cheering but the power failed her A deep colour came into her cheeks she drew her thick black veil over her face and turned away
Philip came downstairs with them saw her enter the carriage followed by her mother Mr Edmonstone outside He remembered the gay smile with which he last saw her seated in that carriage and the active figure that had sprung after her he thought of the kind bright eyes that had pleaded with him for the last time and recollected the suspicions and the pride with which he had plumed himself on his rejection and thrown away the last chance
Should he ever see Amabel again He groaned and went back to the deserted rooms
CHAPTER 37
And see
If aught of sprightly fresh or free
With the calm sweetness may compare
Of the pale form half slumbering there
Therefore this one dear couch about
We linger hour by hour
The love that each to each we bear
All treasures of enduring care
Into her lap we pour
—LYRA INNOCENTUM
The brother and sisters left at home together had been a very sad and silent party unable to attempt comforting each other Charlottes grief was wild and ungovernable breaking out into fits of sobbing and attending to nothing till she was abashed first by a reproof from Mr Ross and next by the description of Amabels conduct when she grew ashamed and set herself to atone by double care for her neglect of Charless comforts
Charles however wanted her little He had rather be let alone After one exclamation of My poor Amy he said not a word of lamentation but lay hour after hour without speaking dwelling on the happy days he had spent with Guy—companion friend brother—the first beam that had brightened his existence, and taught him to make it no longer cheerless musing on the brilliant promise that had been cut off remembering his hopes for his most beloved sister and feeling his sorrow with imagining hers It was his first grief and a very deep one He seemed to have no comfort but in Mr Ross who contrived to come to him every day and would tell him how fully he shared his affection and admiration for Guy how he had marvelled at his whole character as it had shown itself more especially at the time of his marriage when his chastened temper had been the more remarkable in so young a man with the world opening on him so brightly As to the promise lost that indeed Mr Ross owned and pleased Charles by saying how he had hoped to watch its fulfilment but he spoke of its having been in truth no blight only that those fair blossoms were removed where nothing could check their full development or mar their beauty The hope in earthly furrows sown would ripen in the sky Charles groaned saying it was hard not to see it and they might speak as they would but that would not comfort him in thinking of his sister What was his sorrow to hers But Mr Ross had strong trust in Amabels depth and calm resignation He said her spirit of yielding would support her that as in drowning or falling struggling is fatal when quietness saves so it would be with her and that even in this greatest of all trials she would rise instead of being crushed with all that was good and beautiful in her purified and refined Charles heard strove to believe and be consoled and brought out his letters trying with voice breaking down to show Mr Ross how truly he had judged of Amy then listened with a kind of pleasure to the reports of the homely but touching laments of all the village
Laura did not like her brother and sister seek for consolation from Mr Ross or Mary She went on her own way saying little fulfilling her household cares writing all the letters that nobody else would write providing for Charless ease and looking thoroughly cast down and wretched but saying nothing conscious that her brother and sister did not believe her affection for Guy equal to theirs and Charles was too much dejected and too much displeased with Philip to try to console her
It was a relief to hear at length that the travellers had landed and would be at home in the evening not till late wrote Mrs Edmonstone because she thought it best for Amabel to go at once to her room her own old room for she particularly wished not to be moved from it
The evening had long closed in poor Bustle had been shut up in Charlottes room and the three sat together round the fire unable to guess how they should meet her and thinking how they had lately been looking forward to greeting their bride as they used proudly to call her Charles dwelt on that talk on the green and his when shall we three meet again and spoke not a word Laura tried to read and Charlotte heard false alarms of wheels but all were so still that when the wheels really came they were heard all down the turnpike road and along the lane before they sounded on the gravel drive
Laura and Charlotte ran into the hall Charles reached his crutches but his hands shook so much that he could not adjust them and was obliged to sit down rising the next minute as the black figures entered together Amys sweet face was pressed to his but neither spoke That agitated My dear dear Charlie was his mothers as she threw her arms around him with redoubled kisses and streaming tears and there was a trembling tone in his fathers Well Charlie boy how have you got on without us
They sat down Charles with his sister beside him and holding a hand steadier than his own but hot and feverish to the touch He leant forward to look at her face and as if in answer she turned it on him It was the old face paler and thinner and the eyelids had a hard reddened look from want of sleep but Charles like his mother at first was almost awed by the melancholy serenity of the expression Have you been quite well she asked in a voice which sounded strangely familiar in its fond low tones
Yes quite
There was a pause followed by an interchange of question and answer between the others on the journey and on various little home circumstances Presently Mrs Edmonstone said Amy had better come upstairs
I have not seen Bustle said Amy looking at Charlotte
He is in my room faltered Charlotte
I should like to see him
Charlotte hastened away glad to wipe her tears when outside the door Poor Bustle had been watching for his master ever since his departure and hearing the sounds of arrival was wild to escape from his prison He rushed out the moment the door was open and was scratching to be let into the drawingroom before Charlotte could come up with him He dashed in laid his head on Amabels knee and wagged his tail for welcome gave the same greeting to Mr and Mrs Edmonstone but only for a moment for he ran restlessly seeking round the room came to the door and by his wistful looks made Charlotte let him out She followed him and dropping on her knees as soon as she was outside pressed her forehead to his glossy black head whispered that it was of no use he would never come back The dog burst from her and the next moment was smelling and wagging his tail at a portmanteau which he knew as well as she did and she could hardly refrain from a great outburst of sobbing as she thought what joy its arrival had hitherto been
Suddenly Bustle bounded away and as Charlotte stood trying to compose herself enough to return to the drawingroom she heard the poor fellow whining to be let in at Guys bedroom door At the same time the drawingroom door opened and anxious that Amy should neither see nor hear him she ran after him admitted him and shut herself in with him in the dark where with her hands in his long silky curls and sitting on the ground she sobbed over him as long as he would submit to her caresses
Amabel meantime returned to her room and looked round on its wellknown aspect with a sad smile as she thought of the prayer with which she had quitted it on her bridal day and did not feel as if it had been unanswered for surely the hand of a Father had been with her to support her through her great affliction
Though she said she was very well her mother made her go to bed at once and Laura attended on her with a sort of frightened respectful tenderness hardly able to bear her looks of gratitude The first time the two sisters were alone Amabel said Philip is much better
Laura who was settling some things on the table started back and coloured then unable to resist the desire of hearing of him looked earnestly at her sister
He is gone to Corfu continued Amabel He only kept Arnaud three days after we were gone and Arnaud overtook us at Geneva saying his strength had improved wonderfully Will you give me my basket I should like to read you a piece of a note he sent me
Laura brought it and Amabel holding her hand looked up at her face which she vainly tried to keep in order Dearest I have been very sorry for you and so has Guy
Amy and Laura found herself giving way to her tears in spite of all her previous exhortations to Charlotte about selfcontrol my own own sister To have Amy at home was an unspeakable comfort
Papa and mamma were both as kind as possible to Philip continued Amabel but they could not bear to enter on that So I told him you had told all and he was very glad
He was not displeased at my betraying him exclaimed Laura Oh no he was glad he said it was a great relief for he was very anxious about you Laura He has been so kind to me said Amabel so earnestly that Laura received another comfort that of knowing that her sisters indignation against him had all passed by Now I will read you what he says You see his writing is quite itself again
But Laura observed that Amabel only held towards her the Lady Morville on the outside keeping the note to herself and reading I have continued to gain strength since you went so that there is no further need of detaining Arnaud I have twice been out of doors and am convinced that I am equal to the journey indeed it is hardly possible for me to endure remaining here any longer She read no more but folded it up saying I had rather no one saw the rest He makes himself so unhappy about that unfortunate going to Sondrio that he says what is only painful to hear I am glad he is able to join his regiment for a change will be the best thing for him
She laid her head on the pillow as if she had done with the subject and Laura did not venture to pursue it but went down to hear her mothers account of her
Mrs Edmonstone was feeling it a great comfort to have her son to talk to again and availed herself of it to tell him of Philip while Laura was absent and then to return to speak of Amy on Lauras reentrance She said all through the journey Amy had been as passive and tranquil as possible chiefly leaning back in the carriage in silence excepting that when they finally left the view of the snowy mountains she gazed after them as long as the least faint cloudlike summit was visible Still she could not sleep except that now and then she dozed a little in the carriage but at night she heard every hour strike in turn and lay awake through all nor had she shed one tear since her mother had joined her Mrs Edmonstones anxiety was very great for she said she knew Amy must pay for that unnatural calmness and the longer it was before it broke down the worse it would be for her However she was at home that was one thing to be thankful for and happen what might it could not be as distressing as if it had been abroad
Another night of calm unrest and Amabel rose in the morning at her usual hour to put on the garments of her widowhood where she had last stood as a bride Charles was actually startled by her entering the dressingroom just as she used to do before breakfast to read with him and her voice was as steady as ever She breakfasted with the family and came up afterwards with Laura to unpack her dressingcase and take out the little treasures that she and her husband had enjoyed buying in the continental towns as presents for the home party
All this for which she had previously prepared herself she underwent as quietly as possible but something unexpected came on her Charlotte trying to pet and comfort her in every possible way brought in all the best flowers still lingering in the garden and among them a last blossom of the Noisette rose the same of which Guy had been twisting a spray while he first told her of his love
It was too much It recalled his perfect health and vigour his light activity and enjoyment of life and something came on her of the sensation we feel for an insect one moment full of joyous vitality the next crushed and still She had hitherto thought of his feverish thirst and fainting weariness being at rest and felt the relief or else followed his spirit to its repose and rejoiced but now the whole scene brought back what he once was his youthful agile frame his eyes dancing in light his bounding step his gay whistle the strong hand that had upheld her on the precipice the sure foot that had carried aid to the drowning sailors the arm that was to have been her stay for life all came on her in contrast with—death The thought swept over her carrying away every other and she burst into tears
The tears would have their course she could not restrain them when once they began and her struggles to check them only brought an increase of them Her sobs grew so violent that Laura much alarmed made a sign to Charlotte to fetch her mother and Mrs Edmonstone coming in haste found it was indeed the beginning of a frightful hysterical attack The bodily frame had been overwrought to obey the mental firmness and composure and now nature asserted her rights the hysterics returned again and again and when it seemed as if exhaustion had at length produced quiet the opening of a door or a sound in the distance would renew all again
It was not till night had closed in that Mrs Edmonstone was at all satisfied about her and had at length the comfort of seeing her fall into a sound deep sleep such an unbroken dreamless sleep as had scarcely visited her since she first went to Recoara Even this sleep did not restore her she became very unwell and both Dr Mayerne and her mother insisted on her avoiding the least exertion or agitation She was quite submissive only begging earnestly to be allowed to see Mr Ross saying she knew it would do her good rather than harm and promising to let him leave her the instant she found it too much for her and though Mrs Edmonstone was reluctant and afraid they agreed that as she was so reasonable and docile she ought to be allowed to judge for herself
She begged that he might come after church on All Saints day He came and after his first greeting of peace Mrs Edmonstone signed to him to read at once instead of speaking to her The beautiful lesson for the day overcame Mrs Edmonstone so much that she was obliged to go out of Amabels sight but as the words were read Amys face recovered once more the serenity that had been swept away by the sight of the flowers Peace had returned and when the calm everyday words of the service were over she held out her hand to Mr Ross and said Thank you that was very nice Now talk to me
It was a difficult request but Mr Ross understood her and talked to her as she sought in a gentle deep high strain of hope and faith very calm and soothing and with a fatherly kindness that was very pleasant from him who had baptized her taught her and whom she had last seen blessing her and her husband It ended by her looking up to him when it was time for him to go and saying Thank you You will come again when you have time I hope My love to dear Mary I should like to see her soon but I knew you would do me more good than anybody and know better how it feels
Mr Ross knew she meant that he must better understand her loss because he was a widower and was greatly touched though he only answered by a blessing a farewell and a promise to come very soon to see her again
Amabel was right the peace which he had recalled and the power of resignation that had returned had a better effect on her than all her mothers precautions she began to improve and in a few days more was able to leave her bed and lie on the sofa in the dressingroom though she was still so weak and languid that this was as much as she could attempt Any exertion was to be carefully guarded against and her tears now flowed so easily that she was obliged to keep a check on them lest they might again overpower her Mr Ross came again and again and she was able to tell him much of the grounds for her great happiness in Guy hear how entirely he had understood him and be assured that she had done right and not taken an undue responsibility on herself by the argument she had used to summon Philip that last evening She had begun to make herself uneasy about this for she said she believed she was thinking of nothing but Guy and had acted on impulse and she was very glad Mr Ross did not think it wrong while Mr Ross meanwhile was thinking how fears and repentance mingle with the purest sweetest holiest deeds
She was able now to take pleasure in seeing Mary Ross she wrote to Philip at Corfu and sent for Markham to begin to settle the executors business Poor Markham the Edmonstones thought he looked ten years older when he arrived and after his inquiry for Lady Morville his grunt almost amounted to a sob The first thing he did was to give Mrs Edmonstone a note and a little box sent from Mrs Ashford The note was to say that Mrs Ashford had intended for her wedding present a little cross made out of part of the wood of the wreck which she now thought it beat to send to Mrs Edmonstone that she might judge whether Lady Morville would like to see it
Mrs Edmonstones judgment was to carry it at once to Amabel and she was right for the pleasure she took in it was indescribable She fondled it set it up by her on her little table made Charlotte put it in different places that she might see what point of view suited it best had it given back to her held it in her hands caressingly and said she must write at once to Mrs Ashford to thank her for understanding her so well There was scarcely one of the mourners to be pitied more than Markham for the love he had set on Sir Guy had been intense compounded of feudal affection devoted admiration and paternal care—and that he the very flower of the whole race should thus have been cut down in the full blossom of his youth and hopes was almost more than the old man could bear or understand It was a great sorrow too that he should be buried so far away from his forefathers and the hearing it was by his own desire did not satisfy him he sighed over it still and seemed to derive a shade of comfort only when he was told there was to be a tablet in Redclyffe church to the memory of Guy sixth baronet
In the evening Markham became very confidential with Charles telling him about the grievous mourning and lamentation at Redclyffe when the bells rung a knell instead of greeting the young master and his bride and how there was scarcely one in the parish that did not feel as if they had lost a son or a brother He also told more and more of Sir Guys excellence and talked of fears of his own especially last Christmas that the boy was too unlike other people too good to live and lastly he indulged in a little abuse of Captain Morville which did Charless heart good at the same time as it amused him to think how Markham would recollect it when he came to hear of Lauras engagement
In the course of the next day Markham had his conference with Lady Morville in the dressingroom and brought her two or three precious parcels which he would not for the world have given into any other hands He could hardly bear to look at her in her widows cap and behaved to her with a manner varying between his deference and respect to the Lady of Redclyffe and his fatherly fondness for the wife of his boy As to her legal powers he would have thought them foolishly bestowed if they had been conferred by any one save his own Sir Guy and he began by not much liking to act with her but he found her so clearheaded that he was much surprised to find a woman could have so much good sense and began to look forward with some satisfaction to being her prime minister They understood each other very well Amabels good sense and way of attending to the one matter in hand kept her from puzzling and alarming herself by thinking she had more to do than she could ever understand or accomplish she knew it was Guys work and a charge he had given her—a great proof of his confidence—and she did all that was required of her very well so that matters were put in train to be completed when she should be of age in the course of the next January
When Markham left her she was glad to be alone and to open her parcels There was nothing here to make her hysterical for she was going to contemplate the living soul and felt almost as if it was again being alone with her husband There were his most prized and used books covered with marks and written notes there was Lauras drawing of Sintram which had lived with him in his rooms at Oxford there was a roll of music and there was his desk The first thing when she opened it was a rough piece of spar wrapped in paper on which was written M A D Sept 18 She remembered what he had told her of little Mariannes gift The next thing made her heart thrill for it was a slip of pencilling in her own writing Little things on little wings bear little souls to heaven
Her own letters tied up together those few that she had written in the short time they were separated just before their marriage Could that be only six months ago A great bundle of Charless and of Mrs Edmonstones those she might like to read another time but not now Many other papers letters signed S B Dixon which she threw aside notes of lectures and memoranda only precious for the handwriting but when she came to the lower division she found it full of verses almost all the poetry he had ever written
There were the classical translations that used to make him inaccurate a scrap of a very boyish epic about King Arthur beginning with a storm at Tintagel sundry half ballads the verses he was suspected of and never would show that first summer at Hollywell and a very touching vision of his fair young mother Except a translation or two some words written to suit their favourite airs a thing that used to seem to come as easily to him as singing to a bird and a few lively mock heroic accounts of walks or parties which had all been public property there was no more that she could believe to have been composed till last year for he was more disposed to versify in sorrow than in joy There were a good many written during his loneliness for his reflections had a tendency to flow into verse and pouring them out thus had been a great solace The lines were often imperfect and irregular but not one that was not deep pure and genuine and here and there scattered with passages of exquisite beauty and harmony and full of power and grace No one could have looked at them without owning in them the marks of a thorough poet but this was not what the wife was seeking and when she perceived it though it made her face beam with a sort of satisfied pride it was a secondary thing She was studying not his intellect but his soul she did not care whether he would have been a poet what she looked for was the record of the sufferings and struggles of the sad six months when his character was established strengthened and settled
She found it There was much to which she alone had the clue too deep and too obscurely hinted to be understood at a glance She met with such evidence of suffering as made her shudder and weep tokens of the dark thoughts that had gathered round him of the manful spirit of penitence and patience that had been his stay and of the gleams that lighted his darkest hours and showed he had never been quite forsaken Now and then came a reference which brought home what he had told her how the thought of his Verena had cheered him when he dared not hope she would be restored Best of all were the lines written when the radiance of Christmas was once for all dispersing the gloom and the vision opening on him which he was now realizing In reading them she felt the same marvellous sympathy of subdued wondering joy in the victory of which she had partaken as she knelt beside his deathbed These were the last He had been too happy for poetry except one or two scraps in Switzerland and these had been hers from the time she had detected them
No wonder Amabel almost lived on those papers It would not be too much to say she was very happy in her own way when alone with them the desk on a chair by her sofa They were too sacred for any one else she did not for many weeks show one even to her mother but to her they were like a renewal of his presence soothing the craving after him that had been growing on her ever since the first few days when his sustaining power had not passed away As she sorted them and made out their dates finding fresh stores of meaning at each fresh perusal she learnt through them as well as through her own trial so patiently borne to enter into his character even more fully than when he was in her sight Mrs Edmonstone who had at first been inclined to dread her constant dwelling on them soon perceived that they were her great aids through this sad winter
She had much pleasure in receiving the portrait which was sent her by Mr Shene It was a day or two before she could resolve to look at it or feel that she could do so calmly It was an unfinished sketch taken more with a view to the future picture than to the likeness but Guys was a face to be better represented by being somewhat idealized than by copying merely the material form of the features An ordinary artist might have made him like a Morville but Mr Shene had shown all that art could convey of his individual self with almost one of his unearthly looks The beautiful eyes with somewhat of their peculiar lightsomeness the flexible look of the lip the upward pose of the head the set of that lock of hair that used to wave in the wind the animated position just ready for a start as Charles used to call it were recalled as far as was in the power of chalk and crayon but so as to remind Amabel of him more as one belonging to heaven than to earth The picture used to be on her mantelshelf all night the shipwreck cross before it and Sintram and Redclyffe on each side and she brought it into the dressingroom with her in the morning setting it up opposite to the sofa before settling herself
Her days were much alike She felt far from well or capable of exertion and was glad it was thought right to keep her entirely upstairs she only wished to spare her mother anxiety by being submissive to her care in case these cares should be the last for her She did not dwell on the future nor ask herself whether she looked for life or death Guy had bidden her not desire the last and she believed she did not form a wish but there was repose to her in the belief that she ought not to conceal from herself that there was more than ordinary risk and that it was right to complete all her affairs in this world and she was silent when her mother tried to interest her in prospects that might cheer her as if afraid to fasten on them and finding more peace in entire submission than in feeding herself on hope that must be coupled with fear
Christmasday was not allowed to pass without being a festival for her in her quiet room where she lay full of musings on his lonely Christmas night last year his verses folded among her precious books and the real joy of the season more within her grasp than in the turmoil of last year She was not afraid now to let herself fancy his voice in the Angels Song and the rainbow was shining on her cloud
CHAPTER 38
The coldness from my heart is gone
But still the weight is there
And thoughts which I abhor will come
To tempt me to despair
—SOUTHEY
Amabels one anxiety was for Philip For a long time nothing was heard of him at Hollywell and she began to fear that he might have been less fit to take care of himself than he had persuaded her to believe When at length tidings reached them it was through the De Courcys Poor Morville wrote Maurice had been carried ashore at Corfu in the stupor of a second attack of fever He had been in extreme danger for some time and though now on the mend was still unable to give any account of himself
In effect it was a relapse of the former disease chiefly affecting the brain and his impatience to leave Recoara and free himself from Arnaud had been a symptom of its approach though it fortunately did not absolutely overpower him till after he had embarked for Corfu and was in the way to be tended with the greatest solicitude Long after the fever was subdued and his strength returning his mind was astray and even when torturing delusions ceased and he resumed the perception of surrounding objects memory and reflection wavered in dizzy confusion more distressing than either his bodily weakness or the perpetual pain in his head which no remedy could relieve
The first date to which he could afterwards recur though for more than a week he had apparently been fully himself was a time when he was sitting in an easychair by the window obliged to avert his heavy eyes from the dazzling waters of the Corcyran bay where Ulysses transformed ship gleamed in the sunshine and the rich purple hills of Albania sloped upwards in the distance James Thorndale was as usual with him and was explaining that there had been a consultation between the doctor and the colonel and they had decided that as there was not much chance of restoring his health in that climate in the spring
Spring he interrupted with surprise and eagerness Is it spring
Hardly—except that there is no winter here This is the 8th of January
He let his head fall on his hand again and listened with indifference when told he was to be sent to England at once under the care of his servant Bolton and Mr Thorndale himself who was resolved to see him safe in his sisters hands He made no objection he had become used to be passive and one place was much the same to him as another so he merely assented without a question about the arrangements Presently however he looked up and inquired for his letters Though he had done so before the request had always been evaded until now he spoke in a manner which decided his friend on giving him all except one with broad black edges and Broadstone postmark the effect of which it was thought might be very injurious to his shattered nerves and spirits
However he turned over the other letters without interest just glancing languidly through them looked disappointed and exclaimed—
None from Hollywell Has nothing been heard from them Thorndale I insist on knowing whether De Courcy has heard anything of Lady Morville
He has heard of her arrival in England
My sister mentions that—more than two months ago—I can hardly believe she has not written if she was able She promised yet how can I expect— then interrupting himself he added authoritatively Thorndale is there no letter for me I see there is Let me have it
His friend could not but comply and had no reason to regret having done so for after reading it twice though he sighed deeply and the tears were in his eyes he was more calm and less oppressed than he had been at any time since his arrival in Corfu He was unable to write but Colonel Deane had undertaken to write to Mrs Henley to announce his coming and as the cause of his silence must be known at Hollywell he resolved to let Amabels letter wait for a reply till his arrival in England
It was on a chilly day in February that Mrs Henley drove to the station to meet her brother looking forward with a sisters satisfaction to nursing his recovery and feeling for she had a heart after all as if it was a renewal of the days which she regarded with a tenderness mixed with contempt when all was confidence between the brother and sister the days of nonsense and romance She hoped that now poor Philip who had acted hastily on his romance and ruined his own prospects for her sake in his boyish days had a chance of having it all made up to him and reigning at Redclyffe according to her darling wish
As she anxiously watched the arrival of the train she recognized Mr Thorndale whom she had known in his schooldays as Philips protege—but could that be her brother It was his height indeed but his slow weary step as he crossed the platform and left the care of his baggage to others was so unlike his prompt independent air that she could hardly believe it to be himself till with his friend he actually advanced to the carriage and then she saw far deeper traces of illness than she was prepared for A confusion of words took place greetings on one hand and partings on the other for James Thorndale was going on by the train and made only a few minutes halt in which to assure Mrs Henley that though the landing and the journey had knocked up his patient today he was much better since leaving Corfu and to beg Philip to write as soon as possible The bell rang he rushed back and was whirled away
Then you are better said Mrs Henley anxiously surveying her brother You are sadly altered You must let us take good care of you
Thank you I knew you would be ready to receive me though I fear I am not very good company
Say no more my dearest brother You know both Dr Henley and myself have made it our first object that our house should be your home
Thank you
This salubrious air must benefit you she added How thin you are Are you very much fatigued
Rather said Philip who was leaning back wearily but the next moment he exclaimed What do you hear from Hollywell
There is no news yet
Do you know how she is When did you hear of her
About a week ago when she wrote to inquire for you
She did What did she say of herself
Nothing particular poor little thing I believe she is always on the sofa My aunt would like nothing so well as making a great fuss about her
Have you any objection to show me her letter said Philip unable to bear hearing Amabel thus spoken of yet desirous to learn all he could respecting her
I have not preserved it was the answer My correspondence is so extensive that there would be no limit to the accumulation if I did not destroy the trivial letters
There was a sudden flush on Philips pale face that caused his sister to pause in her measured selfsatisfied speech and ask if he was in pain
No he replied shortly and Margaret pondered on his strange manner little guessing what profanation her mention of Amabels letter had seemed to him or how it jarred on him to hear this exaggerated likeness of his own selfcomplacent speeches
She was much shocked and grieved to see him so much more unwell than she had expected He was unfit for anything but to go to bed on his arrival Dr Henley said the system had received a severe shock and it would be long before the effects would be shaken off but that there was no fear but his health would be completely restored if he would give himself entire rest
There was no danger that Margaret would not lavish care enough on her brother She waited on him in his room all the next day bringing him everything he could want and trying to make him come downstairs for she thought sitting alone there very bad for his spirits but he said he had a letter to write and very curious she was to know why he was so long doing it and why he did not tell her to whom it was addressed However she saw when it was put into the postbag that it was for Lady Morville
At last too late to see any of the visitors who had called to inquire when the evening had long closed in she had the satisfaction of seeing Philip enter the drawingroom and settling him in the most comfortable of her easychairs on one side of the fire to wait till the Doctor returned for dinner The whole apartment was most luxurious spacious and richly furnished the fire in its brilliant steel setting glancing on all around and illuminating her own stately presence and rich glace silk as she sat opposite her brother cutting open the leaves of one of the books of the club over which she presided She felt that this was something like attaining one of the objects for which she used to say and think she married—namely to be able to receive her brother in a comfortable home If only he would but look more like himself
Do you like a cushion for your head Philip Is it better
Better since morning thank you
Did those headaches come on before your second illness
I cant distinctly remember
Ah I cannot think how the Edmonstones could leave you I shall always blame them for that relapse
It had nothing to do with it Their remaining was impossible
On Amabels account No poor thing I dont blame her for she must have been quite helpless but it was exactly like my aunt to have but one idea at a time Charles used to be the idol and now it is Amy I suppose
If anything could have made it more intolerable for me it would have been detaining them there for my sake at such a time
Ah I felt a great deal for you You must have been very sorry for that poor little Amy She was very kind in writing while you were ill How did she contrive poor child I suppose you took all the head work for her
I I was nothing but a burden
Were you still so very ill said Margaret tenderly I am sure you must have been neglected
Would that I had muttered Philip so low that she did not catch the words Then aloud—No care could have been greater than was taken for me It was as if no one had been ill but myself and the whole thought of every one had been for me
Then Amabel managed well poor thing We do sometimes see those weak soft characters—
Sister he interrupted
Have not you told me so yourself
I was a fool or worse said he in a tone of suffering No words can describe what she proved herself
Selfpossessed energetic asked Mrs Henley with whom those were the first of qualities and as her brother paused from repugnance to speak of Amabel to one so little capable of comprehending her she proceeded No doubt she did the best she could but she must have been quite inexperienced It was a very young thing in the poor youth to make her executrix I wonder the will was valid but I suppose you took care of that
I did nothing
Did you see it
My uncle showed it to me
Then you can tell me what I want to hear for no one has told me anything I suppose my uncle is to be guardian
No Lady Morville
You dont mean it Most loverlike indeed That poor girl to manage that great property Everything left to her said Mrs Henley continuing her catechism in spite of the unwillingness of his replies Were there any legacies I know of Miss Wellwoods
That to Dixons daughter and my own he answered
Yours How was it that I never heard of it What is it
Ten thousand said Philip sadly
I am delighted to hear it cried Margaret Very proper of Sir Guy—very proper indeed poor youth It is well thought of to soften the disappointment
Philip started forward Disappointment exclaimed he with horror
You need not look as if I wished to commit murder said his sister smiling Have you forgotten that it depends on whether it is a son or daughter
His dismay was not lessened Do you mean to say that this is to come on me if the child is a daughter
Ah you were so young when the entail was made that you knew nothing of it Female heirs were expressly excluded There was some aunt whom old Sir Guy passed over and settled the property on my father and you failing his own male heirs
No one would take advantage of such a chance said Philip
Do not make any rash resolutions my dear brother whatever you do said Margaret You have still the same fresh romantic generous spirit of self-sacrifice that is generally so soon worn out but you must not let it allow you—
Enough of this said Philip hastily for every word was a dagger
Ah you are right not to dwell on the uncertainty I am almost sorry I told you said Margaret Tell me about Miss Wellwoods legacy she continued desirous of changing the subject I want to know the truth of it for every one is talking of itHow comes the world to know of it
There have been reports ever since his death and now it has been paid whatever it is on Lady Morvilles coming of age Do you know what it is The last story I was told was that it was £2OOOO to found a convent to pray for his grand—
Five thousand for her hospital interrupted Philip Sister he added speaking with effort it was for that hospital that he made the request for which we persecuted him
Ah I thought so I could have told you so cried Margaret triumphant in her sagacity but astonished as her brother started up and stood looking at her as if he could hardly resolve to give credit to her words
You—thought—so he repeated slowly
I guessed it from the first He was always with that set and I thought it a very bad thing for him but as it was only a guess it was not worth while to mention it besides the cheque seemed full evidence It was the general course not the individual action
If you thought so why not mention it to me Oh sister what would you not have spared me
I might have done so if it had appeared that it might lead to his exculpation but you were so fully convinced that his whole course confirmed the suspicions that a mere vague idea was not worth dwelling on Your general opinion of him satisfied me
I cannot blame you was all his reply as he sat down again with his face averted from the light
And Mrs Henley was doubtful whether he meant that she had been judicious She spoke again unconscious of the agony each word inflicted
Poor youth we were mistaken in those facts and of course all is forgiven and forgotten now but he certainly had a tremendous temper I shall never forget that exhibition Perhaps poor Amabel is saved much unhappiness
Once for all said Philip sternly let me never hear you speak of him thus We were both blind to a greatness of soul and purity of heart that we shall never meet again Yours was only prejudice mine I must call by a darker name Remember that he and his wife are only to be spoken of with reverence
He composed himself to silence and Margaret after looking at him for some moments in wonder began in a sort of exculpatory tone
Of course we owe him a great deal of gratitude It was very kind and proper to come to you when you were ill and his death must have been a terrible shock He was a fine young man amiable very attractive in manner
No more muttered Philip
That you always said of him continued she not hearing but you have no need to reproach yourself You always acted the part of a true friend did full justice to his many good qualities and only sought his real good
Every word you speak is the bitterest satire on me said Philip goaded into rousing himself for a moment Say no more unless you would drive me distracted
Margaret was obliged to be silent and marvel while her brother sat motionless leaning back in his chair till Dr Henley came in and after a few words to him went on talking to his wife till dinner was announced Philip went with them into the diningroom but had scarcely sat down before he said he could not stay and returned to the drawingroom sofa He said he only wanted quiet and darkness and sent his sister and her husband back to their dinner
What has he been doing said the Doctor here is his pulse up to a hundred again How can he have raised it
He only came down an hour ago and has been sitting still ever since
Talking
Yes and there perhaps I was rather imprudent I did not know he could so little bear to hear poor Sir Guys name mentioned and besides he did not know till I told him that he had so much chance of Redclyffe He did not know the entail excluded daughters
Did he not That accounts for it I should like to see the man who could hear coolly that he was so near such a property This suspense is unlucky just now very much against him You must turn his thoughts from it as much as possible
All the next day Mrs Henley wondered why her brothers spirits were so much depressed resisting every attempt to amuse or cheer them but on the third she thought some light was thrown on the matter She was at breakfast with the Doctor when the post came in and there was a blackedged letter for Captain Morville evidently from Amabel She took it up at once to his room He stretched out his hand for it eagerly but laid it down and would not open it while she was in the room The instant she was gone however he broke the seal and read—
Hollywell February 20th
MY DEAR PHILIP—Thank you much for writing to me It was a great comfort to see your writing again and to hear of your being safe in our own country We had been very anxious about you though we did not hear of your illness till the worst was over I am very glad you are at St Mildreds for I am sure Margaret must be very careful of you and Stylehurst air must be good for you Every one here is well Charles growing almost active and looking better than I ever saw him I wish I could tell you how nice and quiet a winter it has been it has been a great blessing to me in every way so many things have come to me to enjoy Mr Ross has come to me every Sunday and often in the week and has been so very kind I think talking to him will be a great pleasure to you when you are here again You will like to hear that Mr Shene has sent me the picture and the pleasure it gives me increases every day Indeed I am so well off in every way that you must not grieve yourself about me though I thank you very much for what you say Laura reads to me all the evening from dinner to tea I am much better than I was in the winter and am enjoying the soft spring air from the open window making it seem as if it was much later in the year Goodbye my dear cousin may God bless and comfort you Remember that after all it was Gods will not your doing and therefore as he said himself all is as it should be and so it will surely be
Your affectionate cousin
AMABEL F MORVILLE
Childishly simple as this letter might be called with its set of facts without comment and the very commonplace words of consolation it spoke volumes to Philip of the spirit in which it was written—resignation pardon soothing and a desire that her farewell perhaps her last should carry with it a token of her perfect forgiveness Everything from Amabel did him good and he was so perceptibly better that his sister exclaimed when she was next alone with Dr Henley I understand it all poor fellow I thought long ago he had some secret attachment and now I see it was to Amabel Edmonstone
To Lady Morville
Yes You know how constantly he was at Hollywell my aunt so fond of him I dont suppose Amy knew of it and of course she could not be blamed for accepting such an offer as Sir Guys besides she never had much opinion of her own
How No bad speculation for him She must have a handsome jointure but what are your grounds
Everything Dont you remember he would not go to the marriage He mentions her almost like a saint cant hear her name from any one else—keeps her letter to open alone is more revived by it than anything else Ah depend upon it it was to avoid her poor fellow that he refused to go to Venice with them
Their going to nurse him is not as if Sir Guy suspected it
I dont suppose he did nor Amy either No one ever had so much power over himself
Philip would not have thanked his sister for her surmise but it was so far in his favour that it made her avoid the subject and he was thus spared from hearing much of Amabel or of Redclyffe It was bad enough without this Sometimes in nursery tales a naughty child under the care of a fairy is chained to an exaggeration of himself and his own faults and rendered a slave to this hateful self The infliction he underwent in his sisters house was somewhat analogous for Mrs Henleys whole character and especially her complacent speeches were a strong resemblance of his own in the days he most regretted He had ever since her marriage regarded her as a man looks at a fallen idol but never had her alteration been so clear to him as he had not spent much time with her making her short visits and passing the chief of each day at Stylehurst Now he was almost entirely at her mercy and her unvarying kindness to him caused her deterioration to pain him all the more while each selfassertion or harsh judgment sounded on his ear like a repetition of his worst and most hateful presumption She little guessed what she made him endure for he had resumed his wonted stoicism of demeanour though the hardened crust that had once grown over his feelings had been roughly torn away leaving an extreme soreness and tenderness to which an acute pang was given whenever he was reminded not only of his injuries to Guy but of the pride and secret envy that had been their root
At the same time he disappointed her by his continued reserve and depression The confidence she had forfeited was never to be restored and she was the last person to know how incapable she was of receiving it or how low she had sunk in her selfexaltation
He was soon able to resume the hours of the family but was still far from well suffering from languor pain in the head want of sleep and appetite and an evening feverishness He was unequal to deep reading and was in no frame for light books he could not walk far and his sisters literary coteries which he had always despised were at present beyond his powers of endurance She hoped that society would divert his thoughts and raise his spirits and arranged her parties with a view to him but he never could stay long in the room and Dr Henley who though proud of his wife and her talents had little pleasure in her learned circle used to aid and abet his escape
Thus Philip got through the hours as best he might idly turning the pages of new clubbooks wandering on the hills till he tired himself sitting down to rest in the damp air coming home chilled and fatigued and lying on the sofa with his eyes shut to avoid conversation all the evening Neither strength energy nor intellect would serve him for more and this with the load and the stings of a profound repentance formed his history through the next fortnight
He used often to stand gazing at the slowlyrising walls of Miss Wellwoods buildings and the only time he exerted himself in his old way to put down any folly in conversation was when he silenced some of the nonsense talked about her and evinced his own entire approval of her proceedings
CHAPTER 39
Beneath a tapering ashtrees shade
Three graves are by each other laid
Around the very place doth brood
A strange and holy quietude
—BAPTISTERY
Late on the afternoon of the 6th of March Mary Ross entered by the halfopened front door at Hollywell just as Charles appeared slowly descending the stairs
Well how is she asked Mary eagerly
Poor little dear he answered with a sigh she looks very nice and comfortable
What you have seen her
I am at this moment leaving her room
She is going on well I hope
Perfectly well There is one comfort at least said Charles drawing himself down the last step
Dear Amy And the babe—did you see it
Yes the little creature was lying by her and she put her hand on it and gave one of those smiles that are so terribly like his but I could not have spoken about it for the world Such fools we be concluded Charles with an attempt at a smile
It is healthy
All a babe ought to be they say all that could be expected of it except the not being of the right sort and if Amy does not mind that I dont know who should and Charles deposited himself on the sofa heaving a deep sigh intended to pass for the conclusion of the exertion
Then you think she is not disappointed
Certainly not The first thing she said when she was told it was a girl was I am so glad and she does seem very happy with it poor little thing In fact mamma thinks she had so little expected that it would go well with herself or with it that now it is all like a surprise
There was a silence first broken by Charles saying You must be content with me—I cant send for anyone Bustle has taken papa and Charlotte for a walk and Laura is on guard over Amy for we have made mamma go and lie down It was high time after sitting up two nights and meaning to sit up a third
Has she really—can she bear it
Yes I am afraid I have trained her in sitting up and Amy and all of us know that anxiety hurts her more than fatigue She would only lie awake worrying herself instead of sitting peaceably by the fire holding the baby or watching Amy and having a quiet cry when she is asleep For after all it is very sad Charles was trying to brave his feelings but did not succeed very well Yesterday morning I was properly frightened I came into the dressingroom and found mamma crying so that I fully believed it was all wrong but she was just coming to tell us and was only overcome by thinking of not having him to call first and how happy he would have been
And the dear Amy herself
I cant tell She is a wonderful person for keeping herself composed when she ought I see she has his picture in full view but she says not a word except that mamma saw her today when she thought no one was looking fondling the little thing and whispering to it—Guys baby and Guys little messenger Charles gave up the struggle and fairly cried but in a moment rallying his usual tone he went on half laughing—To be sure what a morsel of a creature it is It is awful to see anything so small calling itself a specimen of humanity
It is your first acquaintance with infant humanity I suppose Pray did you ever see a baby
Not to look at In fact Mary I consider it a proof of your being a rational woman that you have not asked me whether it is pretty
I thought you no judge of the article
No it was not to inspect it that Amy sent for me though after all it was for a business I would almost as soon undertake a thing I would not do for any other living creature
Then I know what it is To write some kind message to Captain Morville Just like the dear Amy
Just like her and like no one else except—Of course my father wrote him an official communication yesterday very short but the fact must have made it sweet enough savage as we all were towards him as there was no one else to be savage to unless it might be poor Miss Morville who is the chief loser by being of the feminine gender said Charles again braving what he was pleased to call sentimentality Well by and by my lady wants to know if any one has written to poor Philip as she will call him and by no means contented by hearing papa had she sends to ask me to come to her when I came in from wheeling in the garden and receives me with a request that I would write and tell him how well she is and how glad and so on Theres a piece of work for me
Luckily you are not quite so savage as you pretend either to him or your poor little niece
Whew I should not care whether she was niece or nephew but for him at least not much as long as she comforted Amy but to see him at Redclyffe and be obliged to make much of him at the same time is more than I can very well bear though I may as well swallow it as best I can for she will have me do it as well as on Lauras account Amy believes you know that he will think the inheritance a great misfortune but that is only a proof that she is more amiable than any one else
I should think he would not rejoice
Not exactly but I have no fear that he will not console himself by thinking of the good he will do with it I have no doubt that he was thoroughly cut up and I could even go the length of believing that distress of mind helped to bring on the relapse but it is some time ago And as to his breaking his heart after the first ten minutes at finding himself what he has all his life desired to be in a situation where the full influence of his talents may be felt said Charles with a shade of imitation of his measured tones why that no one but silly little Amy would ever dream of
Well I dare say you will grow merciful as you write
No that is not the way to let my indignation ooze out at my fingers ends I shall begin by writing to condole with Markham Poor man what a state he must be in all the more pitiable because he evidently had entirely forgotten that there could ever be a creature of the less worthy gender born to the house of Morville so it will take him quite by surprise What will he do and how will he ever forgive Mrs Ashford who I see in the paper has a son whom nobody wants as if for the express purpose of insulting Markhams feelings Welladay I should have liked to have had the sound of Sir Guy Morville still in my ears and yet I dont know that I could have endured its being applied to a little senseless baby And after all we are the gainers for it would have been a forlorn thing to have seen Amy go off to reign queenmother at Redclyffe—and most notably well would she have reigned with that clear little head I vow tis a talent thrown away However I cant grumble She is much happier without greatness thrust on her and for my own part I have my homesister all to myself with no rival but that small woman—and how she will pet her
And how you will What a spoiling uncle you will be But now having heard you reason yourself into philosophy Ill leave you to write We were so anxious that I could not help coming I am so glad that little one thrives I should like to leave my love for Amy if youll remember it
The rarity of such a message from you may enable me I was lying here alone and received the collected love of five Harpers to convey upstairs all which I forgot though in its transit by Arnaud and his French it had become that they made their friendships to my lady and Mrs Edmonstone
Charles had not talked so like himself for months and Mary felt that Amabels child if she had disappointed some expectations had come like a spring blossom to cheer Hollywell after its long winter of sorrow and anxiety She seemed to have already been received as a messenger to comfort them for the loss greatest of all to her poor child though she would never know how great Next Mary wondered what kind of letter Charles would indite and guessed it would be all the kinder for the outpouring he had made to her the only person with whom he ventured to indulge in a comfortable abuse of Philip since his good sense taught him that ending as affairs must it was the only wise way to make the best of it with father mother and Charlotte all quite sufficiently disposed to regard Philip with aversion without his help
Philip was at breakfast with the Henleys on the following morning a Sunday—or rather sitting at the breakfasttable when the letters were brought in Mrs Henley pretending to be occupied with her own had an eager watchful eye on her brother as one was placed before him She knew Mr Edmonstones writing but was restrained from exclaiming by her involuntary deference for her brother He flushed deep red one moment then turned deadly pale his hand when first he raised it trembled but then became firm as if controlled by the force of his resolution He broke the black seal drew out the letter paused another instant unfolded it glanced at it pushed his chair from the table and hastened to me door
Tell me tell me Philip what is it she exclaimed rising to follow him
He turned round threw the letter on the table and with a sign that forbade her to come with him left the room
Poor fellow how he feels it That poor young creature said she catching up the letter for explanation
Ha No Listen to this Dr Henley Why he must have read it wrong
Hollywell March 5th
DEAR PHILIP—I have to announce to you that Lady Morville was safely confined this morning with a daughter I shall be ready to send all the papers and accounts of the Redclyffe estate to any place you may appoint as soon as she is sufficiently recovered to transact business Both she and the infant are as well as can be expected
—Yours sincerely
C EDMONSTONE
A daughter cried Dr Henley Well my dear I congratulate you It is as fine a property as any in the kingdom We shall see him pick up strength now
I must go and find him He surely has mistaken said Margaret hastening in search of him but he was not to be found and she saw him no more till she found him in the seat at church
She hardly waited to be in the churchyard after the service before she said Surely you mistook the letter
No I did not
You saw that she is doing well and it is a girl
I—
And will you not let me congratulate you
She was interrupted by some acquaintance but when she looked round he was nowhere to be seen and she was obliged to be content with telling every one the news One or two of her many tame gentlemen came home with her to luncheon and she had the satisfaction of dilating on the grandeur of Redclyffe Her brother was not in the drawingroom but answered when she knocked at his door
Luncheon is ready Will you come down
Is any one there
Mr Brown and Walter Maitland Shall I send you anything or do you like to come down
Ill come thank you said he thus secured from a teteatete
Had you better come Is not your head too bad
It will not be better for staying here Ill come
She went down telling her visitors that since his illness her brother always suffered so much from excitement that he was too unwell to have derived much pleasure from the tidings and when he appeared his air corresponded with her account for his looks were of the gravest and sternest He received the congratulations of the gentlemen without the shadow of a smile and made them think him the haughtiest and most dignified landed proprietor in England
Mrs Henley advised strongly against his going to church but without effect and losing him in the crowd coming out saw him no more till just before dinnertime He had steeled himself to endure all that she and the Doctor could inflict on him that evening and he had a hope of persuading Amabel that it would be only doing justice to her child to let him restore her fathers inheritance which had come to him through circumstances that could not have been foreseen He was determined to do nothing like an act of possession of Redclyffe till he had implored her to accept the offer and it was a great relief thus to keep it in doubt a little longer and not absolutely feel himself profiting by Guys death and sitting in his seat Not a word however must be said to let his sister guess at his resolution and he must let her torture him in the meantime He was vexed at having been startled into betraying his suffering and was humiliated at the thought of the change from that iron imperturbability compounded of strength pride and coldness in which he had once gloried
Dr Henley met him with a shake of the hand and hearty exclamation—
I congratulate you Sir Philip Morville
No that is spared me was his answer
Hem The baronetcy
Yes said Margaret I thought you knew that only goes to the direct heir of old Sir Hugh But you must drop the captain at least You will sell out at once
He patiently endured the conversation on the extent and beauty of Redclyffe wearing all the time a stern resolute aspect that his sister knew to betoken great unhappiness She earnestly wished to understand him but at last seeing how much her conversation increased his headache she desisted and left him to all the repose his thoughts could give him He was very much concerned at the tone of the note from his uncle as if it was intended to show that all connection with the family was to be broken off He supposed it had been concerted with some one with Charles most likely—Charles who had judged him too truly and with his attachment to Guy and aversion to himself was doubtless strengthening his fathers displeasure all the more for this hateful wealth And Laura What did she feel
Monday morning brought another letter At first he was struck with the dread of evil tidings of Amabel or her babe especially when he recognized Charless straggling handwriting and resolved not to be again betrayed he carried it up to read in his own room before his sister had noticed it He could hardly resolve to open it for surely Charles would not write to him without necessity and what save sorrow could cause that necessity He saw that his wretchedness might be even more complete At length he read it and could hardly believe his own eyes as he saw cheering words in a friendly style of interest and kindliness such as he would never have expected from Charles more especially now
Hollywell March 6th
MY DEAR PHILIP—I believe my father wrote to you in haste yesterday but I am sure you will be anxious for further accounts and when there is good news there is satisfaction in conveying it I know you will be glad to hear our affairs are very prosperous and Amy whom I have just been visiting is said by the authorities to be going on as well as possible She begs me to tell you of her welfare and to assure you that she is particularly pleased to have a daughter or perhaps it will be more satisfactory to have her own words You must tell him how well I am Charlie and how very glad And tell him that he must not vex himself about her being a girl for that is my great pleasure and I do believe the very thing I should have chosen if I had set to work to wish You know Amy never said a word but in all sincerity so you must trust her and I add my testimony that she is in placid spirits and may well be glad to escape the cares of Redclyffe My father says he desired Markham to write to you on the business matters I hope the seabreezes may do you good All the party here are well but I see little of them now all the interest of the house is upstairs
—Your affectionate
C M EDMONSTONE
P S The baby is very small but so plump and healthy that no one attempts to be uneasy about her
Never did letter come in better time to raise a desponding heart Of Amabels forgiveness he was already certain but that she should have made Charles his friend was a wonder beyond all others It gave him more hope for the future than he had yet been able to entertain and showed him that the former note was no studied renunciation of him but only an ebullition of Mr Edmonstones disappointment
It gave him spirit enough to undertake what he had long been meditating but without energy to set about it—an expedition to Stylehurst Hitherto it had been his first walk on coming to St Mildreds but now the distance across the moor was far beyond his powers and even that length of ride was a great enterprise It was much further by the carriage road and his sister never liked going there He had never failed to visit his old home till last year and he felt almost glad that he had not carried his thoughts at that time to his fathers grave It was strange that with so many more important burdens on his mind it had been this apparent trivial omission this slight to Stylehurst that in both his illnesses had been the most frequently recurring idea that had tormented him in his delirium So deeply securely fixed is the love of the home of childhood in men of his mould in whom it is perhaps the most deeply rooted of all affections
Without telling his sister his intention he hired a horse and pursued the familiar moorland tracks He passed South Moor Farm it gave him too great a pang to look at it he rode on across the hills where he used to walk with his sisters and looked down into narrow valleys where he had often wandered with his fishingrod lost in musings on plans for attaining distinction and seeing himself the greatest man of his day Little had he then guessed the misery which would place him in the way to the coveted elevation or how he would loathe it when it lay within his grasp
There were the trees round the vicarage the church spire the cottages whose old rough aspect he knew so well the whole scene once redolent of joy and youth but how unable to breathe on him a second spring He put up his horse at the village inn and went to make his first call on Susan the old clerks wife and one of the persons in all the world who loved him best He knocked opened the door and saw her startled from her teadrinking looking at him as a stranger
Bless us It beant never Master Philip she exclaimed her head shaking very fast as she recognized his voice Why sir what a turn you give me How bad you be looking to be sure
He sat down and talked with her with feelings of comfort Tidings of Sir Guys death had reached the old woman and she was much grieved for the nice cheerfulspoken young gentleman whom she well remembered for she like almost every one who had ever had any intercourse with him had an impression left of him as of something winning engaging brightening like a sunbeam It was a refreshment to meet with one who would lament him for his own sake and had no congratulations for Philip himself and the Sure sure it must have been very bad for you with which old Susan heard of the circumstances carried more of the comfort of genuine sympathy than all his sisters attempts at condolence
She told him how often Sir Guy had been at Stylehurst how he had talked to her about the archdeacon and especially she remembered his helping her husband one day when he found him trimming the ash over the archdeacons grave He used to come very often to church there more in the latter part of his stay there was one Sunday—it was the one before Michaelmas—he was there all day walking in the churchyard and sitting in the porch between services
The Sunday before Michaelmas thought Philip the very time when he had been most earnest in driving his uncle to persecute and delighting himself in having triumphed over Guy at last and obtained tangible demonstration of his own foresight and his cousins vindictive spirit What had he been throwing away Where had in truth been the hostile spirit
He took the key of the church and walked thither alone standing for several minutes by the three graves with a sensation as if his father was demanding of him an account of the boy he had watched and brought to his ancestral home and cared for through his orphaned childhood But for the prayerbook the pledge that there had been peace at the last how could he have borne it
Here was the paved path he had trodden in early childhood holding his mothers hand where at each recurring vacation during his school days he had walked between his admiring sisters in the consciousness that he was the pride of his family and of all the parish Of his family Did he not remember his return home for the last time before that when he was summoned thither by his fathers death He had come with a whole freight of prizes and letters full of praises and as he stood in expectation of the expression of delighted satisfaction his father laid his hand on his trophy the pile of books saying gravely— All this would I give Philip for one evidence of humility of mind
It had been his fathers one reproof He had thought it unjust and unreasonable and turned away impatiently to be caressed and admired by Margaret His real feelings had been told to her because she flattered them and shared them he had been reserved and guarded with the father who would have perceived and repressed that ambition and the self-sufficiency which he himself had never known to exist, nor regarded as aught but sober truth It had been his bane that he had been always too sensible to betray outwardly his selfconceit in any form that could lead to its being noticed
He opened the church door closed it behind him and locked himself in
He came up to the communion rail where he had knelt for the first time twelve years ago confident in himself and unconscious of the fears with which his fathers voice was trembling in the intensity of his prayer for one in whom there was no tangible evil and whom others thought a pattern of all that could be desired by the fondest hopes
He knelt down with bowed head and hands clasped Assuredly if his father could have beheld him then it would have been with rejoicing He would not have sorrowed that robust frame was wasted and great strength brought low that the noble features were worn the healthful cheek pale and the powerful intellect clouded and weakened he would hardly have mourned for the cruel grief and suffering such would have been his joy that the humble penitent obedient heart had been won at last Above all he would have rejoiced that the words that most soothed that wounded spirit were—A broken and contrite heart O God Thou wilt not despise
There was solace in that solemn silence the throbs of head and heart were stilled in the calm around It was as if the influences of the prayers breathed for him by his father and the forgiveness and loving spirit there won by Guy had been waiting for him there till he came to take them up for thenceforth the bitterest of his despair was over and he could receive each token of Amabels forgiveness not as heaped coals of fire but as an earnest of forgiveness sealed in heaven
The worst was over and though he still had much to suffer he was becoming open to receive comfort the blank dark remorse in which he had been living began to lighten and the tone of his mind to return
He spoke more cheerfully to Susan when he restored the key but she had been so shocked at his appearance that when the next day a report reached her that Mr Philip was now a grand gentleman and very rich she answered—
Well if it be so I am glad of it but he said never a word of it to me and it is my belief he would give all the money as ever was coined to have the poor young gentleman back again Depend upon it he hates the very sound of it
At the cost of several sheets of paper Philip at length completed a letter to Mr Edmonstone which when he had sent it made his suspense more painful
St Mildreds March 12th
MY DEAR MR Edmonstone—It is with a full sense of the unfitness of intruding such a subject upon you in the present state of the family that I again address you on the same topic as that on which I wrote to you from Italy at the first moment at which I have felt it possible to ask your attention I was then too ill to be able to express my contrition for all that has passed in fact I doubt whether it was even then so deep as at present since every succeeding week has but added to my sense of the impropriety of my conduct and my earnest desire for pardon I can hardly venture at such a time to ask anything further but I must add that my sentiments towards your daughter are unaltered and can never cease but with my life and though I know I have rendered myself unworthy of her and my health both mental and bodily is far from being reestablished I cannot help laying my feelings before you and entreating that you will put an end to the suspense which has endured for so many months by telling me to hope that I have not for ever forfeited your consent to my attachment At least I trust to your kindness for telling me on what terms I am for the present to stand with your family I am glad to hear such favourable reports of Lady Morville and with all my heart I thank Charles for his letter
Yours ever affectionately
P H MORVILLE
He ardently watched for a reply He could not endure the idea of receiving it where Margarets eyes could scan the emotion he could now only conceal by a visible rigidity of demeanour and he daily went himself to the postoffice but in vain He received nothing but business letters and among them one from Markham with as much defiance and dislike in its style as could be shown in a perfectly formal proper letter Till he had referred to Lady Morville he would not make any demonstration towards Redclyffe and evaded all his sisters questions as to what he was doing about it and when he should take measures for leaving the army or obtaining a renewal of the baronetcy
Anxiety made him look daily more wretchedly haggard the Doctor was at fault Mrs Henley looked sagacious while his manner became so dry and repellent that visitors went away moralizing on the absurdity of nouveaux riches taking so much state on them
He wondered how soon he might venture to write to Amabel on whom alone he could depend but he felt it a sort of profanity to disturb her
He had nearly given up his visits to the post in despair when one morning he beheld what never failed to bring some soothing influence namely the fair pointed characters he had not dared to hope for He walked quickly into the promenade sat down and read—
Hollywell March 22nd
MY DEAR PHILIP—Papa does not answer your letter because he says speaking is better than writing and we hope you are well enough to come to us before Sunday week I hope to take our dear little girl to be christened on that day and I want you to be so kind as to be her godfather I ask it of you not only in my own name but in her fathers for I am sure it is what he would choose Her Aunt Laura and Mary Ross are to be her godmothers I hope you will not think me very foolish and fanciful for naming her Mary Verena in remembrance of our old readings of Sintram She is a very healthy quiet creature and I am getting on very well I am writing from the dressingroom and I expect to be downstairs in a few days If you do not dislike it very much could you be so kind as to call upon Miss Wellwood and pay little Marianne Dixons quarter for me It is £1O and it will save trouble if you would do it besides that I should like to hear of her and the little girl I am sorry to hear you are not better—perhaps coming here may do you good—Four oclock I have been keeping my letter in hopes of persuading papa to put in a note but he says he had rather send a message that he is quite ready to forgive and forget and it will be best to talk it over when you come
Your affectionate cousin
A F MORVILLE
It was well he was not under his sisters eye for he could not read this letter calmly and he was obliged to take several turns along the walk before he could recover his composure enough to appear in the breakfastroom where he found his sister alone dealing her letters into separate packets of important and unimportant
Good morning Philip Dr Henley is obliged to go to Bramshaw this morning and has had an early breakfast Have you been out
Yes it is very fine—I mean it will be—the haze is clearing
Margaret saw that he was unusually agitated and not by grief applied herself to teamaking and hoped his walk had given him an appetite but there seemed little chance of this so long were his pauses between each morsel and so often did he lean back in his chair
I am going to leave you on—on Friday he said at length abruptly
Oh are you going to Redclyffe
No to Hollywell Lady Morville wishes me to be her little girls sponsor I shall go to London on Friday and on the next day
I am glad they have asked you Does she write herself Is she pretty well
Yes she is to go downstairs in a day or two
I am rejoiced that she is recovering so well Do you know whether she is in tolerable spirits
She writes cheerfully
How many years is it since I saw her She was quite a child but very sweettempered and attentive to poor Charles said Mrs Henley feeling most amiably disposed towards her future sisterinlaw
Just so Her gentleness and sweet temper were always beautiful and she has shown herself under her trials what it would be presumptuous to praise
Margaret had no doubt now and thought he was ready for more open sympathy
You must let me congratulate you now on this unexpected dawn of hope after your long trial my dear brother It is a sort of unconscious encouragement you could hardly hope for
I did not know you knew anything of it said Philip
Ah my dear brother you betrayed yourself You need not be disconcerted only a sister could see the real cause of your want of spirits Your manner at each mention of her your anxiety coupled with your resolute avoidance of her—
Of whom Do you know what you are talking of sister said Philip sternly
Of Amabel of course
Philip rose perfectly awful in his height and indignation
Sister he said—paused and began again I have been attached to Laura Edmonstone for years past and Lady Morville knows it
To Laura cried Mrs Henley in amaze Are you engaged and as he was hardly prepared to answer she continued If you have not gone too far to recede only consider before you take any rash step You come into this property without ready money you will find endless claims and if you marry at once and without fortune you will never be clear from difficulties
I have considered he replied with cold loftiness that would have silenced any one not of the same determined mould
You are positively committed then she said much vexed Oh Philip I did not think you would have married for mere beauty
I can hear no more discussion on this point answered Philip in the serious calm tone that showed so much power over himself and every one else
It put Margaret to silence though she was excessively disappointed to find him thus involved just at his outset when he might have married so much more advantageously She was sorry too that she had shown her opinion so plainly since it was to be and hurt his feelings just as he seemed to be thawing She would fain have learned more but he was completely shut up within himself and never opened again to her She had never before so grated on every delicate feeling in his mind and he only remained at her house because in his present state of health he hardly knew where to bestow himself till it was time for him to go to Hollywell
He went to call on Miss Wellwood to whom his name was no slight recommendation and she met him eagerly asking after Lady Morville who she said had twice written to her most kindly about little Marianne
It was a very pleasant visit and a great relief He looked at the plans heard the fresh arrangements admired was interested and took pleasure in having something to tell Amabel He asked for Marianne and heard that she was one of the best of children—amiable welldisposed only almost too sensitive Miss Wellwood said it was remarkable how deep an impression Sir Guy had made upon her and how affectionately she remembered his kindness and her distress at hearing of his death had been far beyond what such a child could have been supposed to feel both in violence and in duration
Philip asked to see her knowing it would please Amabel and in she came—a long thin nineyearold child just grown into the encumbering shyness that is by no means one of the graces of la vieillesse de lenfance
He wished to be kind and encouraging but melancholy added to his natural stateliness made him very formidable and poor Marianne was capable of nothing beyond yes or no
He told her he was going to see Lady Morville and her little girl whereat she eagerly raised her eyes then shrank in affright at anything so tall and so unlike Sir Guy He said the baby was to be christened next Sunday and Miss Wellwood helped him out by asking the name
Mary he said for he was by no means inclined to explain the Verena though he knew not half what it conveyed to Amabel
Lastly he asked if Marianne had any message when she hung down her head and whispered to Miss Wellwood what proved to be My love to dear little cousin Mary
He promised to deliver it and departed wishing he could more easily unbend
CHAPTER 40
Blest though every tear that falls
Doth in its silence of past sorrow tell
And makes a meeting seem most like a dear farewell
—WORDSWORTH
On Saturday afternoon about halfpast five Philip Morville found himself driving up to the wellknown front door of Hollywell At the door he heard that every one was out excepting Lady Morville who never came down till the evening save for a drive in the carriage
He entered the drawingroom and gazed on the scene where he had spent so many happy hours only darkened by that one evil spot that had grown till it not only poisoned his own mind but cast a gloom over that bright home
All was as usual Charless sofa little table books and inkstand the workboxes on the table the newspaper in Mr Edmonstones old folds Only the piano was closed and an accumulation of books on the hinge told how long it had been so and the plants in the bay window were brown and dry not as when they were Amabels cherished nurslings He remembered Amabels laughing face and abundant curls when she carried in the camellia and thought how little he guessed then that he should be the destroyer of the happiness of her young life How should he meet her—a widow in her fathers house—or look at her fatherless child He wondered how he had borne to come thither at all and shrank at the thought that this very evening in a few hours he must see her
The outer door opened there was a soft step and Amabel stood before him pale quiet and with a smile of welcome Her bands of hair looked glossy under her widows cap and the deep black of her dress was relieved by the white robes of the babe that lay on her arm She held out her hand and he pressed it in silence
I thought you would like just to see baby said she in a voice something like apology
He held out his arms to take it for which Amy was by no means prepared She was not quite happy even in trusting it in her sisters arms and she supposed he had never before touched an infant But that was all nonsense and she would not vex him with showing any reluctance so she laid the little one on his arm and saw his great hand holding it most carefully but the next moment he turned abruptly from her Poor silly little Amy her heart beat not a little till he turned back restored the babe and while he walked hastily to the window she saw that two large teardrops had fallen on the white folds of its mantle She did not speak she guessed how much he must feel in thus holding Guys child and besides her own tears would now flow so easily that she must be on her guard She sat down settled the little one on her knee and gave him time to recover himself
Presently he came and stood by her saying in a most decided tone Amabel you must let me do this child justice
She looked up wondering what he could mean
I will not delay in taking steps for restoring her inheritance said he hoping by determination to overpower Amabel and make her believe it a settled and a right thing
O Philip you are not thinking of that
It is to be done
You would not be so unkind to this poor little girl said Amy with a persuasive smile partaking of her old playfulness adding very much in earnest Pray put it out of your head directly for it would be very wrong
The nurse knocked at the door to fetch the baby as Amabel had desired When this interruption was over Philip came and sat down opposite to her and began with his most decided manner—
You must listen to me Amy and not allow any scruples to prevent you from permitting your child to be restored to her just rights You must see that the estate has come to me by circumstances such that no honest man can be justified in retaining it The entail was made to exclude females only because of the old Lady Granard It is your duty to consent
The property has always gone in the male line replied Amabel
There never was such a state of things Old Sir Guy could never have thought of entailing it away from his own descendant on a distant cousin It would be wrong of me to profit by these unforeseen contingencies and you ought not in justice to your child to object
He spoke so forcibly and decidedly that he thought he must have prevailed But not one whit convinced Amabel answered in her own gentle voice but beginning with a businesslike argument—Such a possibility was contemplated It was all provided for in the marriage settlements Indeed I am afraid that as it is she will be a great deal too rich Besides Philip I am sure this is exactly what Guy would have chosen and the tears rose in her eyes The first thing that came into my head when she was born was that it was just what he wished that I should have her for myself and that you should take care of Redclyffe I am certain now that he hoped it would be so I know—indeed I do—that he took great pleasure in thinking of its being in your hands and of your going on with all he began You cant have forgotten how much he left in your charge If you were to give it up it would be against his desire and with that knowledge how could I suffer it Then think what a misfortune to her poor little thing to be a great heiress and how very bad for Redclyffe to have no better a manager than me Oh Philip can you not see it is best as it is and just as he wished
He almost groaned—If you could guess what a burden it is
Ah but you must carry it not throw it down on such hands as mine and that tiny babys said she smiling
It would have been the same if it had been a boy
Yes then I must have done the best I could and there would have been an end to look to but I am so glad to be spared And you are so fit for it and will make it turn to so much use to every one
I dont feel as if I should ever be of use to any one said Philip in a tone of complete dejection
Your head is aching said she kindly
It always does more or less replied he resting it on his hand
I am so sorry Has it been so ever since you were ill But you are better You look better than when I saw you last
I am better on the whole but I doubt whether I shall ever be as strong as I used to be That ought to make me hesitate even if— then came a pause while he put his hand over his face and seemed struggling with irrepressible emotion and after all he was obliged to take two walks to the window before he could recover composure and could ask in a voice which he tried to make calm and steady though his face was deeply flushed—Amy how is Laura
She is very well answered Amabel Only you must not be taken by surprise if you see her looking thinner
And she has trusted—she has endured through all said he with inquiring earnestness
O yes
And they—your father and mother—can forgive
They do—they have But Philip it was one of the things I came down to say to you I dont think you must expect papa to begin about it himself You know he does not like awkwardness though he will be very glad when once it is done and ready to meet you half way He did not answer and after a silence Amabel added Laura is out of doors She and Charlotte take very long walks
And is she really strong and well or is it that excited overdoing of employment that I first set her upon he asked anxiously
She is perfectly well and to be busy has been a great help to her said Amabel It was a great comfort that we did not know how ill you had been at Corfu till the worst was over Eveleen only mentioned it when you were better I was very anxious for I had some fears from the note that you sent by Arnaud I am very glad to see you safe here for I have felt all along that we forsook you but I could not help it
I am very glad you did not stay The worst of all would have been that you should have run any risk
There is the carriage said Amy Mamma and Charlie have been to Broadstone They thought they might meet you by the late train
Philips colour rose He stood up—sat down then rising once more leant on the mantelpiece scarcely knowing how to face either of them—his aunt with her wellmerited displeasure and Charles who when he parted with him had accused him so justly—Charles who had seen through him and had been treated with scorn
A few moments and Charles came in leaning on his mother They both shook hands exclaimed at finding Amabel downstairs and Mrs Edmonstone asked after Philips health in her wouldbe cordial manner The two ladies then went upstairs together and thus ended that conference in which both parties had shown rare magnanimity of which they were perfectly unconscious and perhaps the most remarkable part of all was that Philip quietly gave up the great renunciation and socalled sacrifice with which he had been feeding his hopes at the simple bidding of the gentlespoken Amabel—not even telling her that he resigned it He kept the possessions which he abhorred and gave up the renunciation he had longed to make and in this lay the true sacrifice the greater because the world would think him the gainer
When the mother and daughter were gone the cousins were silent Philip resting his elbow on the mantelshelf and his head on his hand and Charles sitting at the end of the sofa warming first one hand then the other while he looked up to the altered face and perceived in it grief and humiliation almost as plainly as illness His keen eyes read that the sorrow was indeed more deeply rooted than he had hitherto believed and that Amabels pity had not been wasted and he was also struck by the change from the great personal strength that used to make nothing of lifting his whole weight
I am sorry to see you so pulled down said he We must try if we can doctor you better than they did at St Mildreds Are you getting on do you think
He had hardly ever spoken to Philip so entirely without either bitterness or sarcasm and his manner hardly seemed like that of the same person
Thank you I am growing stronger but as long as I cannot get rid of this headache I am good for nothing
You have had a long spell of illness indeed said Charles You cant expect to shake off two fevers in no time Now all the anxiety is over you will brighten like this house
But tell me what is thought of Amabel Is she as well as she ought to be
Yes quite they say—has recovered her strength very fast and is in just the right spirits She was churched yesterday and was not the worse for it It was a trial for she had not been to Easthill since—since last May
It is a blessing indeed said Philip earnestly
She has been so very happy with the baby said Charles You hear what its name is to be
Yes she told me in her letter
To avoid having to tell you here I suppose Mary is for common wear Verena is for ourselves She asked if it would be too foolish to give such a name and mamma said the only question was whether she would like indifferent people to ask the reason of it
Philip lapsed into thought and presently said abruptly When last we parted you told me I was malignant You were right
Shake hands was all Charless reply and no more was said till Charles rose saying it was time to dress Philip was about to help him but he answered No thank you I am above trusting to anything but my own crutches now I am proud to show you what feats I can perform
Charles certainly did get on with less difficulty than heretofore but it was more because he wanted to spare Philip fatigue than because he disdained assistance that he chose to go alone Moreover he did what he had never done for any one before—he actually hopped the whole length of the passage beyond his own door to do the honours of Philips room and took a degree of pains for his comfort that seemed too marvellous to be true in one who had hitherto only lived to be attended on
By the time he had settled Philip the rest of the party had come home and he found himself wanted in the dressingroom to help his mother to encourage his father to enter on the conversation with Philip in the evening for poor Mr Edmonstone was in such a worry and perplexity that the whole space till the dinnerbell rang was insufficient to console him in Laura meanwhile was with Amabel who was trying to cheer her fluttering spirits and nerves which after having been so long harassed gave way entirely at the moment of meeting Philip again How would he regard her after her weakness in betraying him for want of self-command Might he not be wishing to be free of one who had so disappointed him and only persisting in the engagement from a sense of honour The confidence in his affection which had hitherto sustained her was failing and not all Amabel could say would reassure her No one could judge of him but herself his words were so cautious and he had so much command over himself that nobody could guess Of course he felt bound to her but if she saw one trace of his being only influenced by honour and pity she would release him and he should never see the struggle
She had worked herself up into almost a certainty that so it would be and Amabel was afraid she would not be fit to go down to dinner but the sound of the bell and the necessity of moving seemed to restore the habit of external composure in a moment She settled her countenance and left the room
Charlotte meantime had been dressing alone and raging against Philip declaring she could never bear to speak to him and that if she was Amy she would never have chosen him for a godfather And to think of his marrying just like a good hero in a book and living very happy ever after To be sure she was sorry for poor Laura but it was all very wrong and now they would be rewarded How could Charlie be so provoking as to talk about his sorrow She hoped he was sorry and as to his illness it served him right
All this Charlotte communicated to Bustle but Bustle had heard some mysterious noise and insisted on going to investigate the cause and Charlotte finding her own domain dark and cold and private conferences going on in Amabels apartment and the dressingroom was fain to follow him downstairs as soon as her toilet was complete only hoping Philip would keep out of the way
But behold there he was and even Bustle was propitiated for she found him his nose on Philips knee looking up in his face and wagging his tail while Philip stroked and patted him and could hardly bear the appealing expression of the eyes that always wistful now seemed to every one to be looking for his master
To see this attention to Bustle won Charlotte over in a moment How are you Philip Good dog dear old Bustle came in a breath and they were both making much of the dog when she amicably asked if he had seen the baby and became eager in telling about the christening
The dinnerbell brought every one down but Amabel The trembling hands of Philip and Laura met for a moment and they were in the diningroom
Diligently and dutifully did Charles and Mrs Edmonstone keep up the conversation the latter about her shopping the former about the acquaintances who had come to speak to him as he sat in the carriage As soon as possible Mrs Edmonstone left the diningroom then Laura flew up again to the dressingroom sank down on a footstool by Amabels side and exclaiming O Amy he is looking so ill burst into a flood of tears
The change had been a shock for which Laura had not been prepared Amy who had seen him look so much worse had not thought of it and it overcame Laura more than all her anxieties lest his love should be forfeited She sobbed inconsolably over the alteration and it was long before Amabel could get her to hear that his face was much less thin now and that he was altogether much stronger it was fatigue and anxiety tonight and tomorrow he would be better Laura proceeded to brood over her belief that his altered demeanour his settled melancholy his not seeking her eye his cold shake of the hand all arose from the diminution of his love and his dislike to be encumbered with a weak foolish wife with whom he had entangled himself when he deemed her worthy of him She dwelt on all this in silence as she sat at her sisters feet and Amy left her to think only now and then giving some caress to her hair or cheek and at each touch the desolate waste of life that poor Laura was unfolding before herself was rendered less dreary by the thought I have my sister still and she knows sorrow too Then she half envied Amy who had lost her dearest by death and held his heart fast to the last not like herself doomed to see the love decay for which she had endured so long—decay at the very moment when the suspense was over
Laura might justly have envied Amabel though for another reason it was because in her cup there was no poison of her own infusing
There she stayed till Charlotte came to summon her to tea saying the gentlemen except Charles were still in the diningroom
They had remained sitting over the fire for a considerable space waiting for each other to begin Mr Edmonstone irresolute Philip striving to master his feelings and to prevent increasing pain and confusion from making him forget what he intended to say At last Mr Edmonstone started up pulled out his keys took a candle and said Come to the study—Ill give you the Redclyffe papers
Thank you said Philip also rising but only because he could not sit while his uncle stood Not tonight if you please I could not attend to them
What your head Eh
Partly Besides there is another subject on which I hope you will set me at rest before I can enter on any other
Yes—yes—I know said Mr Edmonstone moving uneasily
I am perfectly conscious how deeply I have offended
Mr Edmonstone could not endure the apology
Well well he broke in nervously I know all that and it cant be helped Say no more about it Young people will be foolish and I have been young and in love myself
That Captain Morville should live to be thankful for being forgiven in consideration of Mr Edmonstones having been young
May I then consider myself as pardoned and as having obtained your sanction
Yes yes yes and I hope it will cheer poor Laura up again a little Four years has it gone on Constancy indeed and it is time it should be rewarded We little thought what you were up to so grave and demure as you both were So you wont have the papers tonight I cant say you do look fit for business Perhaps Laura may suit you better—eh Philip
Lovemaking was such a charming sight to Mr Edmonstone that having once begun to look on Philip and Laura as a pair of lovers he could not help being delighted and forgetting as well as forgiving all that had been wrong
They did not however exactly answer his ideas Laura did not once look up and Philip instead of going boldly to take the place next her sat down holding his hand to his forehead as if too much overpowered by indisposition to think of anything else Such was in great measure the case he was very much fatigued with the journey and these different agitating scenes had increased the pain in his head to a violent degree besides which feeling that his aunt still regarded him as she did at Recoara he could not bear to make any demonstration towards Laura before her lest she might think it a sort of triumphant disregard of her just displeasure
Poor Laura saw in it both severe suffering and dislike to her and the more she understood from her fathers manner what had passed in the other room the more she honoured him for the sacrifice he was making of himself
Mrs Edmonstone waited on the headache with painful attention but they all felt that the only thing to be done for the two poor things was to let them come to an explanation so Charlotte was sent to bed her mother went up to Amy Charles carried off his father to the study and they found themselves alone
Laura held down her face and struggled to make her palpitating heart and dry tongue suffer her to begin the words to which she had wound herself up Philip raised his hands from his eyes as the door shut then rose up and fixed them on Laura She too looked up as if to begin their eyes met and they understood all He stepped towards her and held out his hands The next moment both hers were clasped in his—he had bent down and kissed her brow
No words of explanation passed between them Laura knew he was her own and needed no assurance that her misgivings had been vain There was a start of extreme joy such as she had known twice before but it could be only for a moment while he looked so wretchedly unwell It did but give her the right to attend to him The first thing she said was to beg him to lie down on the sofa her only care was to make him comfortable with cushions and he was too entirely worn out to say anything he had intended capable only of giving himself up to the repose of knowing her entirely his own and of having her to take care of him There he lay on the sofa with his eyes shut and Lauras hand in his while she sat beside him neither of them speaking and excepting that she withdrew her hand neither moved when the others returned
Mrs Edmonstone compassionated him and showed a great deal of solicitude about him trying hard to regard him as she used to do yet unable to bring back the feeling and therefore do what she would failing to wear its semblance
Laura sad anxious and restless had no relief till she went to wish her sister good night Amabel who was already in bed stretched out her hand with a sweet look beaming with affection and congratulation
You dont want to be convinced now that all is right said she
His head is so dreadfully bad said Laura
Ah it will get better now his mind is at rest
If it will but do so
And you know you must be happy tomorrow because of baby
My dear said Mrs Edmonstone coming in I am sorry to prevent your talk but Amy must not be kept awake She must keep her strength for tomorrow
Good night then dear dear Laura I am so glad your trouble is over and you have him again whispered Amabel with her parting kiss and Laura went away better able to hope to pray and to rest than she could have thought possible when she left the drawingroom
Poor dear Laura said Mrs Edmonstone sighing I hope he will soon be better
Has it been very uncomfortable
I cant say much for it my dear He was suffering terribly with his head so that I should have been quite alarmed if he had not said it was apt to get worse in the evening and she poor thing was only watching him However it is a comfort to have matters settled and papa and Charlie are well pleased with him But I must not keep you awake after driving Laura away You are not overtired tonight I hope my dear
Oh no only sleepy Good night dearest mamma
Good night my own Amy then as Amy put back the coverings to show the little face nestled to sleep on her bosom good night you little darling dont disturb your mamma How comfortable you look Good night my dearest
Mrs Edmonstone looked for a moment while trying to check the tears that came at the thought of the night one brief year ago when she left Amy sleeping in the light of the Easter moon Yet the sense of peace and serenity that had then given especial loveliness to the maidens chamber on that night was there still with the young widow It was dim lamplight now that beamed on the portrait of her husband casting on it the shade of the little wooden cross in front while she was shaded by the white curtains drawn from her bed round the infants little cot so as to shut them both into the quiet twilight where she lay with an expression of countenance that though it was not sorrow made Mrs Edmonstone more ready to weep than if it had been so with her last good night she left her
And Amabel always liked to be shut in by herself dearly as she loved them all and mamma especially there was always something pleasant in being able to return to her own world to rest in the thoughts of her husband and in the possession of the little unconscious creature that had come to inhabit that inner world of hers the creature that was only his and hers
She had from the first always felt herself less lonely when quite alone before with his papers and now with his child and could Mrs Edmonstone have seen her face she would have wept and wondered more as Amy fondled and hushed her babe whispering to it fond words which she could never have uttered in the presence of any one who could understand them and which had much of her extreme youthfulness in them Not one was so often repeated or so endearing as Guys baby Guys own dear little girl It did not mean half so much when she called it her baby and she loved to tell the little one that her father had been the best and the dearest but he was gone away and would she be contented to be loving and good with only her mother to take care of her and tell her as well as she could what a father hers was when she was old enough to know about him
Tonight Amy told her much in that soft solemn murmuring tone about what was to befall her tomorrow and the great blessings to be given to her and how the poor little fatherless one would be embraced in the arms of His mercy and received by her great Father in heaven—Ay and brought nearer to your own papa and know him in some inner way and he will know his little child then for you will be as good and pure and bright as he and you will belong to the great communion of saints tomorrow you precious little one and be so much nearer to him as you will be so much better than I Oh baby if we can but both endure to the end
With such halfuttered words Amabel Morville slept the night before her babes christening
CHAPTER 41
A strangers roof to hold thy head
A strangers foot thy grave to tread
Desert and rock and Alp and sea
Spreading between thy home and thee
—SEWELL
Mary Ross was eager for the first report from Hollywell the next morning and had some difficulty in keeping her attention fixed on her class at school Laura and Charlotte came in together in due time and satisfied her so far as to tell her that Amy was very well
Is Captain Morville come thought Mary No I cannot guess by Lauras impressive face Never mind Charles will tell me all between services
The first thing she saw on coming out of school was the pony carriage with Charles and Captain Morville himself Charlotte who was all excitement had time to say while her sister was out of hearing—
It is all made up now Mary and I really am very sorry for Philip
It was fortunate that Mary understood the amiable meaning this speech was intended to convey and she began to enter into its grounds in the short conference after church when she saw the alteration in the whole expression of countenance
Yes said Charles who as usual remained at the vicarage during the two services and who perceived what passed in her mind if it is any satisfaction to you to have a good opinion of your fellowsponsor I assure you that I am converted to Amys opinion I do believe the black dog is off his back for good and all
I never saw any one more changed said Mary
Regularly tamed said Charles He is something more like his old self today than last night and yet not much He was perfectly overpowered then—so knocked up that there was no judging of him Today he has all his sedateness and scrupulous attention but all like a shadow of former time—not a morsel of sententiousness and seeming positively grateful to be treated in the old fashion
He looks very thin and pale Do you think him recovered
A good way from it said Charles He is pretty well today comparatively though that obstinate headache hangs about him If this change last longer than that and his white looks I shall not even grudge him the sponsorship Amy owed me
Very magnanimous said Mary Poor Laura I am glad her suspense is over I wondered to see her at school
They are very sad and sober lovers and it is the best way of not making themselves unbearable considering—Well that was a different matter How little we should have believed it if any one had told us last year what would be the state of affairs today By the bye Amys godson is christened today
Who
Didnt you hear that the Ashfords managed to get Amy asked if she would dislike their calling their boy by that name we shall never hear again and she was very much pleased and made offer in her own pretty way to be godmother I wonder how Markham endures it I believe he is nearly crazy He wrote me word he should certainly have given up all concern with Redclyffe but for the especial desire of—What a state of mind he will be in when he remembers how he has been abusing the captain to me
The afternoon was fresh and clear and there was a spring brightness in the sunshine that Amabel took as a greeting to her little maiden as she was carried along the churchyard path Many an eye was bent on the mother and child especially on the slight form unseen since she had last walked down the aisle her arm linked in her bridegrooms
Little Amy Edmonstone as they had scarcely learnt to cease from calling her before she was among them again the widowed Lady Morville and with those kind looks of compassion for her were joined many affectionate mourning thoughts of the young husband and father lying far away in his foreign grave and endeared by kindly remembrances to almost all present There was much of pity for his unconscious infant and tears were shed at the thought of what the wife must be suffering but if the face could have been seen beneath the thick crape folds of her veil it would have shown no tears—only a sweet calm look of peace and almost gladness
The babe was on her knees when the time for the christening came she was awake and now and then making a little sound and as she was quieter with her than any one else Amabel thought she might herself carry her to the font
It was deep grave happiness to stand there with her child in her arms and with an undefined sense that she was not alone as if in some manner her husband was present with her praying with her prayers and joining in offering up their treasure when the babe was received into Mr Rosss arms and Amy putting back her veil gazed up with a wistful but serene look
To her lifes end Therewith came a vision of the sunrise at Recoara and the more glorious dawn that had shone in Guys dying smile and Amabel knew what would be her best prayer for his little Mary Verena as she took her back the drops glistening on her brow her eyes open and arms outspread It was at that moment that Amabel was first thrilled with a look in her child that was like its father She had earnestly and often sought a resemblance without being able honestly to own that she perceived any but now though she knew not in what it consisted there was something in that baby face that recalled him more vividly than picture or memory
Lord now lettest Thou Thy servant depart in peace
Those words seemed to come from her own heart She had brought Guys daughter to be baptized and completed his work of pardon and she had a yearning to be departing in peace whither her sunshine was gone But he had told her not to wish that his child should be motherless she had to train her to be fit to meet him The sunshine was past but she had plenty to do in the shade and it was for his sake She would therefore be content to remain to fulfil her duties among the dear ones to whom he had trusted her for comfort and with the sense of renewed communion with him that she had found in returning again to church
So felt Amabel as she entered into the calm that followed the one year in which she had passed through the great events of life and known the chief joy and deepest grief that she could ever experience
It was far otherwise with her sister Lauras term of trouble seemed to be ending and the spring of life beginning to dawn on her
Doubt and fear were past she and Philip were secure of each other he was pardoned and they could be together without apprehension or playing tricks with their consciences but she had as yet scarcely been able to spend any time with him and as Charles said their ways were far more grave and less loverlike than would have seemed natural after their long separation
In truth romantic and uncalculating as their attachment was they never had been loverlike They had never had any fears or doubts her surrender of her soul had been total and every thought feeling and judgment had taken its colour from him as entirely as if she had been a wife of many years standing She never opened her mind to perceive that he had led her to act wrongly and all her unhappiness had been from anxiety for him not repentance on her own account for so complete was her idolatry that she entirely overlooked her failure in duty to her parents
It took her by surprise when as they set out together that evening to walk home from Easthill he said as soon as they were apart from the village—
Laura you have more to forgive than all
Dont speak so Philip pray dont Do you think I would not have borne far more unhappiness willingly for your sake Is it not all forgotten as if it had not been
It is not unhappiness I meant he replied though I cannot bear to think of what you have undergone Unhappiness enough have I caused indeed But I meant that you have to forgive the advantage I took of your reliance on me to lead you into error when you were too young to know what it amounted to
It was not an engagement faltered Laura
Laura dont for mercys sake recall my own hateful sophistries exclaimed Philip as if unable to control the pain it gave him I have had enough of that from my sister then softening instantly it was selfdeceit a deception first of myself then of you You had not experience enough to know whither I was leading you till I had involved you and when the sight of death showed me the fallacy of the salve to my conscience I had nothing for it but to confess and leave you to bear the consequences O Laura when I think of my conduct towards you it seems even worse than that towards—towards your brotherinlaw
His low stern tone of bitter suffering and selfreproach was something new and frightful to Laura She clung to his arm and tried to say—O dont speak in that way You know you meant the best You could not help being mistaken
If I did know any such thing Laura but the misery of perceiving that my imagined anxiety for his good—his good indeed was but a cloak for my personal enmity—you can little guess it
Laura tried to say that appearances were against Guy but he would not hear
If they were I triumphed in them I see now that a shade of honest desire to see him exculpated would have enabled me to find the clue If I had gone to St Mildreds at once—interrogated him as a friend—seen Wellwood—but dwelling on the ifs of the last two years can bring nothing but distraction he added pausing suddenly
And remember said Laura that dear Guy himself was always grateful to you He always upheld that you acted for his good Oh the way he took it was the one comfort I had last year
The acutest sting and yet the only balm murmured Philip see Laura and he opened the first leaf of Guys prayerbook which he had been using at the christening
A whispered Dear Guy was the best answer she could make and the tears were in her eyes He was so very kind to me when he saw me that unhappy weddingday
Did Amy tell you his last words to me
No said Laura
God bless you and my sister he repeated so low that she could hardly hear
Amy left that for you to tell said Laura as her tears streamed fast How can we speak of her Philip
Only as an angel of pardon and peace he answered
I dont know how to tell you of all her kindness said Laura half the bitterness of it seemed to be over when once she was in the house again and all the winter going into her room was like going into some peaceful place where one must find comfort
Spirits of peace where are ye I could have said when I saw her drive away at Recoara and carry all good angels with her except those that could not but hover round that grave
How very sad it must have been Did—
Dont speak of it dont ask me of it said Philip hastily There is nothing in my mind but a tumult of horror and darkness that it is madness to remember Tell me of yourself—tell me that you have not been hurt by all that I have brought on you
Oh no said Laura besides that is all at an end
All an end Laura I fear in joining your fate to mine you will find care and grief by no means at an end You must be content to marry a saddened remorseful man broken down in health and spirits his whole life embittered by that fatal remembrance forced to endure an inheritance that seems to have come like the prosperity of the wicked Yet you are ready to take all this Then Laura that precious most precious love that has endured through all will be the one drop of comfort through the rest of my life
She could but hear such words with thrills of rejoicing affection and on they walked Laura trembling and struck with sorrow at the depth of repentance he now and then disclosed though not in the least able to fathom it thinking it all his nobleness of mind justifying him to herself idolizing him too much to own he had ever been wrong yet the innate power of tact and sympathy teaching her no longer to combat his selfreproaches and repeat his former excuses but rather to say something soothing and caressing or put in some note of thankfulness and admiration of Amy and Guy This was the best thing she could do for him as she was not capable like Amy of acknowledging that his repentance was wellfounded She was a nurse not a physician to the wounded spirit but a very good and gentle nurse she was and the thorough enjoyment of her affection and sympathy the opening into confidence and the freedom from doubt and suspense were comforts that were doing him good every hour
The christening party consisted only of the Rosses and Dr Mayerne who had joined them at Easthill church and walked home with Mr Edmonstone They could not have been without him so grateful were they for his kindness all through their anxious winter and Mr Edmonstone was well pleased to tell him on the way home that they might look to having a wedding in the family it had been a very long attachment constancy as good as a story and he could all along have told what was the matter when mamma was calling in the doctor to account for Lauras looking pale
The doctor was not surprised at the news for perhaps he too had had some private theory about those pale looks but knowing pretty well the sentiments Charles had entertained the winter before last he was curious to find out how he regarded this engagement Charles spoke of it in the most ready cordial way Well doctor so you have heard our news I flatter myself we have as tall and handsome a pair of lovers to exhibit here as any in the United Kingdom when we have fattened him a little into condition
Never was there a better match said Dr Mayerne Made for each other all along One could not see them without feeling it was the first chapter of a novel
When Mrs Edmonstone came in the doctor was a little taken aback He thought her mind must be with poor Sir Guy and was afraid the lovers had been in such haste as to pain Lady Morville for there was a staidness and want of epanchement du coeur of answering that was very unlike her usual warm manner At dinner Mr Edmonstone was in high spirits delighted at Amys recovery happy to have a young man about the house again charmed to see two lovers together pleased that Laura should be mistress of Redclyffe since it could not belong to Amys child altogether as joyous as ever His wife being at ease about Amy did her best to smile and even laugh though sad at heart all the time as she missed the father from the christening feast and thought how happy she had been in that far different reunion last year It might be the same with Charles but the outward effect was exhibited in lively nonsense Charlottes spirits were rising fast and only Philip and Laura themselves were grave and silent she the more so because she was disappointed to find that the one walk back from Easthill much as he had enjoyed it had greatly tired Philip However the others talked enough without them and Mr Edmonstone was very happy drinking the health of Miss Morville and himself carrying a bit of the christening cake to the mamma in the drawingroom
There sat Amabel by the fire knowing that from henceforth she must exert herself to take part in the cheerfulness of the house and willing to join the external rejoicing in her childs christening or at least not to damp it by remaining upstairs Yet any one but Mr Edmonstone would have seen more sadness than pleasure in the sweet smile with which she met and thanked him but they were cheerful tones in which she replied and in her presence everything was hushed and gentle subdued yet not mournful The spirit of that evening was only recognized after it was past and then it ever grew fairer and sweeter in recollection so as never to be forgotten by any of those who shared it
CHAPTER 42
She was not changed when sorrow came
That awed the sternest men
It rather seemed she kept her flame
To comfort us till then
But sorrow passed and others smiled
With happiness once more
And she drew back the spirit mild
She still had been before
—S R
Philips marriage could not take place at once No one said but every one felt that it must not be talked of till the end of Amabels first year of widowhood and in the meantime Philip remained at Hollywell gaining strength every day making more progress in one week than he had done in six at St Mildreds finding that as his strength returned his mind and memory regained their tone and he was as capable as ever of applying to business and above all much settled and comforted by some long conversations with Mr Ross
Still he could not endure the thought of being at Redclyffe The business connected with it was always performed with pain and dislike and he shrank with suffering at every casual mention of his going thither Mrs Edmonstone began to wonder whether he could mean to linger at Hollywell all the summer and Amabel had some fears that it would end in his neglecting Redclyffe till a letter arrived from Lord Thorndale saying that his brother the member for Moorworth had long been thinking of giving up his seat and latterly had only waited in hopes that the succession at Redclyffe might come to Philip Morville Moorworth was entirely under the Thorndale and Morville interest and Lord Thorndale wrote to propose that Philip should come forward at once inviting him to Thorndale instead of going to his own empty house
To be in parliament had been one of the favourite visions of Philips youth and for that very reason he hesitated taking it as one of the strange fulfilments of his desires that had become punishments He could not but feel that as this unhappy load of wealth had descended on him he was bound to make it as beneficial as he could to others and not seeking for rest or luxury to stand in the gap where every good man and true was needed But still he dreaded his old love of distinction He disliked a London life for Laura and he thought that precarious as his health had become it might expose her to much anxiety since he was determined that if he undertook it at all he would never be an idle member
It ended in his referring the decision to Laura who disliking London fearful for his health eager for his glory and reluctant to keep back such a champion from the battle was much perplexed only desirous to say what he wished yet not able to make out what that might be She carried her doubts to Charles and Amabel who both pronounced that the thought of going to Redclyffe seemed far worse for him than any degree of employment—that occupation of the mind was the best thing for his spirits and ended by recommending that Dr Mayerne should be consulted
He was of the same opinion He said a man could hardly have two fevers following and one of them upon the brain without having reason to remember them That his constitution had been seriously weakened and there was an excitability of brain and nerves which made care requisite but depression of spirits was the chief thing to guard against and a London life provided he did not overwork himself was better for him than solitude at Redclyffe
Accordingly Philip went to Thorndale and was returned for Moorworth without opposition Markham sent his nephew to transact business with him at Thorndale for he could not bear to meet him himself and while there was any prospect of his coming to Redclyffe walked about in paroxysms of grunting and illhumour The report that Mr Morville was engaged to the other Miss Edmonstone did but render him more furious for he regarded it as a sort of outrage to Lady Morvilles feelings that a courtship should be carried on in the house with her She was at present the object of all his devoted affection for the family and he would not believe but that she had been as much disappointed at the birth of her daughter as he was himself He would not say one word against Mr Morville but looked and growled enough to make Mr Ashford afraid that the new squire would find him very troublesome
The Ashfords were in a state of mind themselves to think that Mr Morville ought to be everything excellent to make up for succeeding Sir Guy but having a very high opinion of him to begin with they were very sorry to find all Redclyffe set against him In common with the parish they were very anxious for the first report of his arrival and at length he came James Thorndale as before drove him thither coming to the Ashfords while he was busy with Markham He would not go up to the Park he only went through some necessary business with Markham and then walked down to the Cove afterwards sitting for about ten minutes in Mrs Ashfords drawingroom
The result of the visit was that old James Robinson reported that the new squire took on as much about poor Sir Guy as any one could do and turned as pale as if he had been going into a swoon when he spoke his name and gave Ben his message And as to poor Ben the old man said he regularly did cry like a child and small blame to him to hear that Sir Guy had took thought of him at such a time and so far away and he verily believed Ben could never take again to his bad ways after such a message as that
Markham was gruff with the Robinsons for some time after and was even heard to mutter something about worshipping the rising sun an act of idolatry of which he could not be accused since it was in the most grudging manner that he allowed that Mr Morvilles sole anxiety seemed to be to continue all Sir Guy had undertaken while Mrs Ashford on the other hand was much affected by the account her cousin James had been giving her of the grief that he had suffered at Sir Guys death his long illness his loss of spirits the reluctance he had shown to come here at all and his present unconquerable dread of going to the Park
He was soon after in London where as far as could be judged in such early days he seemed likely to distinguish himself according to the fondest hopes that Margaret or Laura could ever have entertained Laura was only afraid he was overworking himself especially as having at present little command of ready money he lived in a small lodging kept no horse and did not enter into society but she was reassured when he came to Hollywell for a day or two at Whitsuntide not having indeed regained flesh or colour but appearing quite well in better spirits and very eager about political affairs
All would have been right that summer but that as Philip observed the first evening of his arrival Amabel was not looking as well as she had done at the time of the christening She had just after it tried her strength and spirits too much and had ever since been not exactly unwell but sad and weary more dejected than ever before unable to bear the sight of flowers or the sound of music and evidently suffering much under the recurrence of the season which had been that of her great happiness—the summer sunshine the long evenings the nightingales songs She was fatigued by the most trifling exertion and seemed able to take interest in nothing but her baby and a young widow in the village who was in a decline and though she was willing to do all that was asked of her it was in a weary melancholy manner as if she had no peace but in being allowed to sit alone drooping over her child
From society she especially shrunk avoiding every chance of meeting visitors and distressed and harassed when her father brought home some of his casual dinner guests and was vexed not to see her come into the drawingroom in the evening If she did make the effort of coming to please him she was so sure to be the worse for it that her mother would keep her upstairs the next time and try to prevent her from knowing that her father was put out and declared it was nonsense to expect poor Amy to get up her spirits while she never saw a living soul and only sat moping in the dressingroom
A large dinnerparty did not interfere with her for even he could not expect her to appear at it and one of these he gave during Philips visit for the pleasure of exhibiting such company as the MP for Moorworth After dinner Charlotte told Mary Ross to go and see Amy Not finding her in the dressingroom she knocked at her own door Come in answered the low soft voice and in the window overhung by the long shoots of the roses Amabels close cap and small head were seen against the deepblue evening sky as she sat in the summer twilight her little one asleep in her cot
Thank you for coming said she I thought you would not mind sitting here with baby and me I have sent Anne out walking
How pretty she looks said Mary stooping over the infant Sleep is giving her quite a colour and how fast she grows
Poor little woman said Amy sighing
Tired Amy said Mary sitting down and taking up the little lambswool shoe that Amy had been knitting
N—no thank you said Amy with another sigh
I am afraid you are You have been walking to Alice Lamsdens again
I dont think that tires me Indeed I believe the truth is and her voice sounded especially sad in the subdued tone in which she spoke that she might not disturb the child I am not so much tired with what I do which is little enough as of the long long life that is before me
Marys heart was full but she did not show her thought otherwise than by a look towards the babe
Yes poor little darling said Amabel I know there is double quantity to be done for her but I am so sorry for her when I think she must grow up without knowing him
She has you though Mary could not help saying as she felt that Amabel was superior to all save her husband
Perhaps Amy did not hear she went up to the cot and went on—If he had but once seen her if she had but had one kiss one touch that I could tell her of by and by it would not seem as if she was so very fatherless Oh no baby I must wait that you may know something about him for no one else can tell you so well what he was though I cant tell much She presently returned to her seat No I dont believe I really wish I was like poor Alice said she I hope not I am sure I dont for her sake But Mary I never knew till I was well again how much I had reckoned on dying when she was born I did not think I was wishing it but it seemed likely and I was obliged to arrange things in case of it Then somehow as he came back last spring after that sad winter it seemed as if this spring though he would not come back to me I might be going to him
But then she comforted you
Yes that she did my precious one I was so glad of her it was a sort of having him again and so it is still sometimes and will be more so I dare say I am very thankful for her indeed I am and I hope I am not repining for it does not signify after all in the end if I am weary and lonely sometimes I wish I was sure it was not wrong I know I dont wish to alter things
No I am sure you dont
Ah said Amabel smiling it is only the old silly little Amy that does feel such a heartaching and longing for one glance of his eye or touch of his hand or sound of his foot in the passage Oh Mary the worst of all is to wake up after dreaming I have heard his voice There is nothing for it but to take our baby and hold her very tight
Dearest Amy But you are not blaming yourself for these feelings It might be wrong to indulge them and foster them but while you struggle with them they cant in themselves be wrong
I hope not said Amabel pausing to think Yes I have the joy at the bottom still I know it is all quite right and it came straight from heaven as he said I can get happy very often when I am by myself or at church with him it is only when I miss his bright outside and cant think myself into the inner part that it is so forlorn and dreary I can do pretty well alone Only I wish I could help being so troublesome and disagreeable to everybody said Amy concluding in a matterof-fact tone
My dear said Mary almost laughing
It is so stupid of me to be always poorly and making mamma anxious when theres nothing the matter with me And I know I am a check on them downstairs—papa and Charlotte and all—they are very kind considerate and yet—she paused—and it is a naughty feeling but when I feel all those dear kind eyes watching me always and wanting me to be happy it is rather oppressive especially when I cant but if I try not to disappoint them I do make such a bad hand of it and am sure to break down afterwards and that grieves mamma all the more
It will be better when this time of year is over said Mary
Perhaps yes He always seemed to belong to summer days and to come with them Well I suppose trials always come in a different shape from what one expects for I used to think I could bear all the doom with him but I did not know it would be without him and yet that is the best Oh baby
I should not have come to disturb her
No—never mind she never settles fairly to sleep till we are shut in by ourselves Hush hush darling—No Will nothing do but being taken up Well then there Come and show your godmamma what a black fringe those little wakeful eyes are getting
And when Mary went down it was with the conviction that those black eyelashes too marked to be very pretty in so young a babe were more of a comfort to Amabel than anything she could say
The evening wore on and at length Laura came into her sisters room She looked fagged and harassed the old face she used to wear in the time of disguise and secrecy Amabel asked if it had been a tiresome party
Yes—no—I dont know Just like others said Laura
You are tired at any rate said Amabel You took too long a ride with Philip I saw you come in very late
I am not in the least tired thank you
Then he is said Amabel I hope he has not one of his headaches again
No said Laura still in a dissatisfied uncomfortable tone
No Dear Laura I am sure there is something wrong and with a little more of her winning pleading kindness she drew from Laura that Philip had told her she idolized him He had told her so very gently and kindly but he had said she idolized him in a manner that was neither good for herself nor him and he went on to blame himself for it which was what she could not bear It had been rankling in her mind ever since that he had found fault with her for loving him so well and it had made her very unhappy She could not love him less and how should she please him She had much rather he had blamed her than himself
I think I see what he means said Amy thoughtfully He has grown afraid of himself and afraid of being admired now
But how am I to help that Amy said Laura with tears in her eyes he cannot help being the first the very first of all with me—
No no said Amy quickly not the very first or what would you do if you were to be—like me Dont turn away dear Laura I dont think I over could bear this at all if dear Guy had not kept it always before my eyes from the very first that we were to look to something else besides each other
Of course I meant the first earthly thing said Laura but it was not heartfelt—she knew she ought therefore she thought she did
And so proceeded Amy I think if that other is first it would make you have some other standard of right besides himself then you would be a stay and help to him I think that is what he means
Amy let me ask you said Laura a little entreatingly yet as if she must needs put the question—surely you never thought Guy had faults
Her colour deepened Yes Laura she answered firmly I could not have understood his repentance if I had not thought so And dear Laura if you will forgive me for saying it it would be much better for yourself and Philip if you would see the truth
I thought you forgave him murmured Laura
Oh Laura but does not that word forgive imply something I could not have done anything to comfort him that day if I had not believed he had something to be comforted for It cant be pleasant to him to see you think his repentance vain
It is noble and great
But if it was not real it would be thrown away Besides dear Laura do let me say this for once If you would but understand that you let him lead you into what was not right and be really sorry for that and show mamma that you are I do think it would all begin much more happily when you are married
I could never have told till I was obliged to betray myself said Laura You know Amy it was no engagement We never wrote to each other we had but one walk it was no business of his to speak till he could hope for papas consent to our marriage It would have been all confusion if he had told and that would have been only that we had always loved each other with all our hearts which every one knew before
Yet Laura it was what preyed on him when he thought he was dying
Because it was the only thing like a fault he could think of said Laura excited by this shade of blame to defend him vehemently—because his scruples are high and noble and generous
She spoke so eagerly that the babys voice again broke on the conversation and she was obliged to go away but though her idolatry was complete it did not seem to give full satisfaction or repose As to Philip though his love for her was unchanged it now and then was felt though not owned by him that she was not fully a helpmeet only a Self'; not such a Self' as he had left at St Mildreds but still reflecting on him his former character instead of aiding him to a new one
CHAPTER 43
But nature to its inmost part
Faith had refined and to her heart
A peaceful cradle given
Calm as the dew drops free to rest
Within a breezefanned roses breast
Till it exhales to heaven
—WORDSWORTH
It had long been a promise that Mr Edmonstone should take Charlotte to visit her grandmamma in Ireland They would have gone last autumn but for Guys illness and now Aunt Charlotte wrote to hasten the performance of the project Lady Mabel was very anxious to see them she said and having grown much more infirm of late seemed to think it would be the last meeting with her son She talked so much of Mrs Edmonstone and Laura that it was plain that she wished extremely for a visit from them though she did not like to ask it in the present state of the family
A special invitation was sent to Bustle indeed Charles said Charlotte could not have gone without his permission for he reigned like a tyrant over her evidently believing her created for no purpose but to wait on him and take him to walk
Laura was a great favourite at the cottage of Kilcoran and felt she ought to offer to go Philip fully agreed and held out home hopes of following as soon as the session was over and he had been to Redclyffe about some business that had been deferred too long
And now it appeared that Mr Edmonstone had a great desire to take his wife and she herself said that under any other circumstances she should have been very desirous of going She had not been to Ireland for fifteen years and was sorry to have seen so little of her motherinlaw and now that it had been proved that Charles could exist without her she would not have hesitated to leave him but for Amabels state of health and spirits which made going from home out of the question
Charles and Amabel did not think so It was not to be endured that when grandmamma wished for her she should stay at home for them without real necessity besides the fatigue anxiety and sorrow she had undergone of late had told on her and had made her alter perceptibly from being remarkably fresh and youthful to be somewhat aged and the change to a new scene where she could not be distressing herself at every failure in cheerfulness of poor Amys was just the thing to do her good
Amabel was not afraid of the sole charge of Charles or of the baby for she had been taught but too well to manage for herself she understood Charles very well and had too much quiet good sense to be fanciful about her very healthy baby Though she was inexperienced with old nurse hard by and Dr Mayerne at Broadstone there was no fear of her not having good counsel enough She was glad to be of some use by enabling her mother to leave Charles and her only fear was of being dull company for him but as he was so kind as to bear it she would do her best and perhaps their neighbours would come and enliven him sometimes
Charles threw his influence into the same scale His affectionate observation had shown him that it oppressed Amabels spirits to be the object of such constant solicitude and he was convinced it would be better for her both to have some necessary occupation and to be free from that perpetual mournful watching of her mothers that caused her to make the efforts to be cheerful which did her more harm than anything else
To let her alone to look and speak as she pleased without the fear of paining and disappointing those she loved keep the house quiet and give her the employment of household cares and attending on himself was he thought the best thing for her and he was full of eagerness and pleasure at the very notion of being of service to her if only by being good for nothing but to be waited on He thought privately that the spring of his mothers mind had been so much injured by the grief she had herself suffered for her son Guy her cruel disappointment in Laura and the way in which she threw herself into all Amys affliction that there was a general depression in her way of observing and attending Amy which did further harm and that to change the current of her thoughts and bring her home refreshed and inspirited would be the beginning of improvement in all Or as he expressed it to Dr Mayerne We shall set off on a new tack
His counsel and Mr Edmonstones wishes at length decided mamma on condition that Mary Ross and Dr Mayerne would promise to write on alternate weeks a full report moral and physical as Charles called it So in due time the goods were packed Mrs Edmonstone cried heartily over the baby advised Amabel endlessly about her and finally looked back through her tears as she drove away to see Charles nodding and waving his hand at the baywindow and Amabel standing with her parting smile and goodbye on the steps
The reports moral and physical proved that Charles had judged wisely Amabel was less languid as she had more cause for exertion and seemed relieved by the absence of noise and hurry spending more time downstairs and appearing less weary in the evening She still avoided the garden but she began to like short drives with her brother in the ponycarriage when he drove on in silence and let her lean back and gaze up into the sky or into the far distance undisturbed Now and then he would be rejoiced by a bright genuine smile perfectly refreshing at some of the pretty ways of the babe a small but plump and lively creature beginning to grasp with her hands laugh and gaze about with eyes that gave promise of the peculiar colour and brilliancy of her fathers Amabel was afraid she might be tempted into giving Charles too much of the little ladys society but he was very fond of her regarding her with an odd mixture of curiosity and amusement much entertained with watching what he called her unaccountable manners and greatly flattered when he could succeed in attracting her notice Indeed the first time she looked full at him with a smile on the verge of a laugh it completely overcame him by the indescribably forcible manner in which it suddenly recalled the face which had always shone on him like a sunbeam Above all it was worth anything to see the looks she awoke in her mother for which he must have loved her even had she not been Guys child
In the evening especially on Sunday Amabel would sometimes talk to him as she had never yet been able to do about her last summers journey and her stay at Recoara and his way of listening and answering had in it something that gave her great pleasure while on his side he deemed each fresh word of Guys a sort of treasure for which to be grateful to her The brother and sister were a great help and happiness to each other Amabel found herself restored to Charles as Guy had liked to think of her and Charles felt as if the old childish fancies were fulfilled in which he and Amy were always to keep house together He was not in the least dull and though his goodnatured visitors in the morning were welcome and received with plenty of his gay lively talk he did not by any means stand in need of the compassion they felt for him and could have done very well without them while the evenings alone with Amy had in them something so pleasant that they were almost better than those when Mr Ross and Mary came to tea He wrote word to his mother that she might be quite at ease about them and he thought Amy would get through the anniversaries of September better while the house was quiet so that she need not think of trying to hurry home
He was glad to have done so for the letters which scarcely missed a day in being written by his mother and Charlotte seemed to show that their stay was likely to be long Lady Mabel was more broken than they had expected and claimed a long visit as she was sure it would be their last while the Kilcoran party had taken possession of Laura and Charlotte as if they never meant to let them go Charlotte wrote her brother very full and very droll accounts of the Iricisms around her which she enjoyed thoroughly and Charles declaring he never expected to see little Charlotte come out in the character of the facetious correspondent used to send Mary Ross into fits of laughing by what he read to her Mr Fielder the tutor wrote Charlotte was very nearly equal to Eveleens description of him but very particularly agreeable in fact the only man who had any conversation whom she had seen since she had been at Kilcoran
Imagine said Charles the impertinent little puss setting up for intellectual conversation forsooth
Thats what comes of living with good company said Mary
The brother and sister used sometimes to drive to Broadstone to fetch their letters by the second post
Charlotte of course said Charles as he opened one My Lady Morville whats yours
Only Mr Markham said Amabel about the winding up of our business together I suppose What does Charlotte say
Charlotte is in a fit of impudence for which she deserves chastisement said Charles unable to help laughing as he read—
Our last event was a call from the fidus Achates who it seems can no longer wander up and down the Mediterranean without his pius Aeneas and so has left the army and got a diplomatic appointment somewhere in Germany Lord Kilcoran has asked him to come and stay here and Mabel and I are quite sure he comes for a purpose Of course he has chosen this time in order that he may be able to have his companion before his eyes as a model for courtship and I wish I had you to help me look on whenever Philip comes as that laugh I must enjoy alone with Bustle However when Philip will come we cannot think for we have heard nothing of him this age not even Laura and she is beginning to look very anxious about him Do tell us if you know anything about him The last letter was when parliament was prorogued and he was going to Redclyffe at least three weeks ago
I wonder if Mr Markham mentions him said Amabel hastily unfolding her letter which was as she expected about the executors business but glancing on to the end she exclaimed—
Ah here it is Listen Charlie Mr Morville has been here for the last few weeks and is I fear very unwell He has been entirely confined to the house almost ever since his arrival by violent headache which has completely disabled him from attending to business but he will not call in any advice I make a point of going to see him every day though I believe my presence is anything but acceptable as in his present state of health and spirits I cannot think it right that he should be left to servants Poor fellow Redclyffe has been too much for him
Overworked I suppose said Charles I thought he was coming it pretty strong these last few weeks
Not even writing to Laura How very bad he must be I will write at once to ask Mr Markham for more particulars
She did so and on the third day they drove again to fetch the answer It was a much worse account Mr Morville was said Markham suffering dreadfully from headache and lay on the sofa all day almost unable to speak or move but resolved against having medical advice though his own treatment of himself did not at all succeed in relieving him There was extreme depression of spirits and an unwillingness to see any one He had positively refused to admit either Lord Thorndale or Mr Ashford and would hardly bear to see Markham himself who indeed only forced his presence on him from thinking it unfit to leave him entirely to the servants and would be much relieved if some of Mr Morvilles friends were present to free him from the responsibility
Hem said Charles I cant say it sounds comfortable
It is just as I feared said Amy Great excitability of brain and nerve Dr Mayerne said All the danger of a brain fever again Poor Laura What is to be done
Charles was silent
It is for want of some one to talk to him said Amabel I know how he broods over his sad recollections and Redclyffe must make it so much worse If mamma and Laura were but at home to go to him it might save him and it would be fearful for him to have another illness reduced as he is How I wish he was here
He cannot come I suppose said Charles or he would be in Ireland
Yes How well Guy knew when he said it would be worse for him than for me How I wish I could do something now to make up for running away from him in Italy If I was but at Redclyffe
Do you really wish it said Charles surprised
Yes if I could do him any good
Would you go there
If I had but papa or mamma to go with me
Do you think I should do as well
Charlie
If you think there would be any use in it and choose to take the trouble of lugging me about the country I dont see why you should not
Oh Charlie how very kind How thankful poor Laura will be to you I do believe it will save him cried Amabel eagerly
But Amy—he paused—shall you like to see Redclyffe
Oh that is no matter said she quickly I had rather see after Philip than anything I told you how he was made my charge you know And Laura Only will it not be too tiring for you
I cant see how it should hurt me But I forget what is to be done about your daughter
I dont know what harm it could do her said Amy considering Mrs Gresham brought a baby of only three months old from Scotland the other day and she is six It surely cannot hurt her but we will ask Dr Mayerne
Mamma will never forgive us if we dont take the doctor into our councils
Arnaud can manage for us We would sleep in London and go on by an early train and we can take our—I mean my—carriage for the journey after the railroad It would not be too much for you How soon could we go
The sooner the better said Charles If we are to do him any good it must be speedily or it will be a case of shutting the stabledoor Why not tomorrow
The project was thoroughly discussed that evening but still with the feeling as if it could not be real and when they parted at night they said—We will see how the scheme looks in the morning
Charles was still wondering whether it was a dream when the first thing he heard in the court below his window was—
Here William heres a note from my lady for you to take to Dr Mayerne
They be none of them ill answered Williams voice
O no my lady has been up this hour and Mr Charles has rung his bell Stop William my lady said you were to call at Harriss and bring home a Bradshaw
Reality indeed thought Charles marvelling at his sister and his elastic spirits throwing him into the project with a sort of enjoyment partaking of the pleasure of being of use the spirit of enterprise and the fun of starting independently on an expedition unknown to all the family
He met Amabel with a smile that showed both were determined He undertook to announce the plan to his mother and she said she would write to tell Mr Markham that as far as could be reckoned on two such frail people they would be at Redclyffe the next evening and he must use his own discretion about giving Mr Morville the note which she enclosed
Dr Mayerne came in time for breakfast and the letter from Markham was at once given to him
A baddish state of things eh doctor said Charles Well what do you think this lady proposes To set off forthwith both of us to take charge of him What do you think of that Dr Mayerne
I should say it was the only chance for him said the doctor looking only at the latter Spirits and health reacting on each other I see it plain enough Overworked in parliament doing nothing in moderation going down to that gloomy old place dreaming away by himself going just the right way to work himself into another attack on the brain and then he is done for I dont know that you could do a wiser thing than go to him for he is no more fit to tell what is good for him than a child So spoke the doctor thinking only of the patient till looking up at the pair he was dismissing to such a charge the helpless crippled Charles unable to cross the room without crutches and Amabel her delicate face and fragile figure in her widows mourning looking like a thing to be pitied and nursed with the tenderest care with that young child too he broke off and said—But you dont mean you are in earnest
Never more so in our lives said Charles on which Dr Mayerne looked so wonderingly and inquiringly at Amabel that she answered—
Yes that we are if you think it safe for Charles and baby
Is there no one else to go Whats become of his sister
That would never do said Charles that is not the question and he detailed their plan
Well I dont see why it should not succeed said the doctor or how you can any of you damage yourselves
And baby said Amy
What should happen to her do you think said the doctor with his kind reassuring roughness Unless you leave her behind in the carriage I dont see what harm she could come to and even then if you direct her properly she will come safe to hand Amabel smiled and saying she would fetch her to be inspected ran upstairs with the light nimble step of former days
There goes one of the smallest editions of the wonders of the world said Charles covering a sigh with a smile You dont think it will do her any harm
Not if she wishes it I have long thought a change a break would be the best thing for her—poor child—I should have sent her to the seaside if you had been more movable and if I had not seen every fuss about her made it worse
Thats what I call being a reasonable and valuable doctor said Charles If you had routed the poor little thing out to the sea she would have only pined the more But suppose the captain turns out too bad for her management for old Markham seems in a proper taking
Hem No I dont expect it is come to that
Be that as it may I have a head if nothing else and some one is wanted Ill write to you according as we find Philip
The doctor was wanted for another private interview in which to assure Amabel that there was no danger for Charles and then after promising to come to Redclyffe if there was occasion and engaging to write and tell Mrs Edmonstone they had his consent he departed to meet them by and by at the station and put Charles into the carriage
A very busy morning followed Amabel arranged household affairs as befitted the vicequeen took care that Charless comforts were provided for wrote many a note herself took down Guys picture and laid it in her box before Anne commenced her packing and lastly walked down to the village to take leave of Alice Lamsden
Just as the last hues of sunset were fading on the following evening Lady Morville and Charles Edmonstone were passing from the moor into the wooded valley of Redclyffe Since leaving Moorworth not a word had passed Charles sat earnestly watching his sister though there was too much crape in the way for him to see her face and she was perfectly still so that all he could judge by was the close rigid clasping together of the hands resting on the sleeping infants white mantle Each spot recalled to him some description of Guys the churchtower the school with the two large new windows the park wall the rising ground within What was she feeling He did not dare to address her till at the lodgegate he exclaimed—Theres Markham and at the same time was conscious of a feeling between hope and fear that this might after all be a fools errand and a wonder how they and the master of the house would meet if it turned out that they had taken fright without cause
At his exclamation Amy leant forward and beckoned Markham came up to the window and after the greeting on each side walked along with his hand on the door as the carriage slowly mounted the steep hill answering her questions How is he
No better He has been putting on leeches and made himself so giddy that yesterday he could hardly stand
And they have not relieved him
Not in the least I am glad you are come for it has been an absurd way of going on
Is he up
Yes on the sofa in the library
Did you give him my note Does he expect us
No I went to see about telling him this morning but found him so low and silent I thought it was better not He has not opened a letter this week and he might have refused to see you as he did Lord Thorndale Besides I didnt know how he would take my writing about him though if you had not written I believe I should have let Mrs Henley know by this time
There is an escape for him murmured Charles to his sister
We have done the best in our power to receive you proceeded Markham I hope you will find it comfortable Lady Morville but—
Thank you I am not afraid said Amy smiling a little Markhams eye was on the little white bundle in her lap but he did not speak of it and went on with explanations about Mrs Drew and Bolton and the sittingroom and tea being ready
Charles saw the great red pile of building rise dark gloomy and hauntedlooking before them The house that should have been Amabels Guys own beloved home How could she bear it But she was eagerly asking Markham how Philip should be informed of their arrival and Markham was looking perplexed and saying that to drive under the gateway into the paved court would make a thundering sound that he dreaded for Mr Morville Could Mr Charles Edmonstone cross the court on foot Charles was ready to do so the carriage stopped Amabel gave the baby to Anne saw Arnaud help Charles out and turning to Markham said I had better go to him at once Arnaud will show my brother the way
The sittingroom Arnaud said Markham and walked on fast with her while Charles thought how strange to see her thus pass the threshold of her husbands house come thither to relieve and comfort his enemy
She entered the darkoak hall On one side the light shone cheerfully from the sittingroom the other doors were all shut Markham hesitated and stood reluctant
Yes you had better tell him I am here said she in the voice so gentle that no one perceived its resolution
Markham knocked at one of the high heavy doors and softly opened it Amabel stood behind it and looked into the room more than half dark without a fire and very large gloomy and cheerless in the gray autumn twilight that just enabled her to see the white pillows on the sofa and Philips figure stretched out on it Markham advanced and stood doubtful for an instant then in extremity began—Hem Lady Morville is come and—
Without further delay she came forward saying—How are you Philip
He neither moved nor seemed surprised he only said So you are come to heap more coals on my head
A thrill of terror came over her but she did not show it as she said I am sorry to find you so poorly
It seemed as if before he had taken her presence for a dream for entirely roused he exclaimed in a tone of great surprise Is it you Amy Then sitting up Why When did you come here
Just now We were afraid you were ill we heard a bad account of you so we have taken you by storm Charles your goddaughter and I are come to pay you a visit
Charles Charles here cried Philip starting up Where is he
Coming in said Amy and Philip intent only on hospitality hastened into the hall and met him at the door gave him his arm and conducted him where the inviting light guided them to the sittingroom The full brightness of lamp and fire showed the ashy paleness of his face his hair rumpled with lying on the sofa had on the temples acquired a noticeable tint of gray his whole countenance bore traces of terrible suffering and Amabel thought that even at Recoara she had never seen him look more wretchedly ill
How did you come he asked It was very kind I hope you will be comfortable
We have taken good care of ourselves said Amy I wrote to Mr Markham for I thought you were not well enough to be worried with preparations We ought to beg your pardon for breaking on you so unceremoniously
If any one should be at home here— said Philip earnestly—then interrupting himself he shaded his eyes from the light I dont know how to make you welcome enough When did you set off
Yesterday afternoon said Charles we slept in London and came on today
Have you dined said Philip looking perplexed to know where the dinner could come from
Yes at K—— thank you
What will you have Ill ring for Mrs Drew
No thank you dont tease yourself Mrs Drew will take care of us Never mind but how bad your head is said Amabel as he sat down on the sofa leaning his elbow on his knee and pressing his hand very hard on his forehead You must lie down and keep quiet and never mind us We only want a little tea I am just going to take off my bonnet and see what they have done with baby and then Ill come down Pray lie still till then Mind he does Charlie
They thought she was gone but the next moment there she was with the two pillows from the library sofa putting them under Philips head and making him comfortable while he overpowered by a fresh access of headache had neither will nor power to object She rang asked for Mrs Drew and went
Philip lay with closed eyes as if in severe pain and Charles afraid to disturb him sat feeling as if it was a dream That he with Amy and her child should be in Guys home so differently from their old plans so very differently from the way she should have arrived He looked round the room and everywhere knew what Guys taste had prepared for his bride—piano books prints similarities to Hollywell all with a fresh new bridal effect inexpressibly melancholy They brought a thought of the bright eye sweet voice light step and merry whistle and as he said to himself gone for ever he could have hated Philip but for the sight of his haggard features gray hairs and the deep lines which at sevenandtwenty sorrow had traced on his brow At length Philip turned and looked up
Charles he said I trust you have not let her run any risk
No we got Dr Mayernes permission
It is like all the rest said Philip closing his eyes again Presently he asked How did you know I was not well
Markham said something in a business letter that alarmed Amy She wrote to inquire and on his second letter we thought we had better come and see after you ourselves
No more was said till Amabel returned She had made some stay upstairs talking to Mrs Drew who was bewildered between surprise joy and grief looking to see that all was comfortable in Charless room making arrangements for the child and at last relieving herself by a short space of calm to feel where she was realize that this was Redclyffe and whisper to her little girl that it was her fathers own home She knew it was the room he had destined for her she tried dark as it was to see the view of which he had told her and looked up over the mantelpiece at Mullers engraving of St John Perhaps that was the hardest time of all her trial and she felt as if without his child in her arms she could never have held up under the sense of desolation that came over her left behind while he was in his true home Left she told herself to finish the task he had begun and to become fit to follow him Was she not in the midst of fulfilling his last charge that Philip should be taken care of It was no time for giving way and here was his own little messenger of comfort looking up with her sleepy eyes to tell her so Down she must go and put off thinking herself into happiness till the peaceful time of rest and presently she softly reentered the sittingroom bringing to both its inmates in her very presence such solace as she little guessed in her straightforward desire to nurse Philip and take care Charles was not made uncomfortable
That stately house had probably never since its foundation seen anything so homelike as Amabel making tea and waiting on her two companions both she and Charles pleasing each other by enjoying the meal and Philip giving his cup to be filled again and again and wondering why one persons tea should taste so unlike anothers
He was not equal to conversation and Charles and Amabel were both tired so that tea was scarcely over before they parted for the night and Amy frightened at the bright and slipperiness of the darkoak stairs could not be at peace till she had seen Arnaud help Charles safely up them and made him promise not to come down without assistance in the morning
She was in the sittingroom soon after nine next morning and found breakfast on one table and Charles writing a letter on the other
Well said he as she kissed him all right with you and little miss
Quite thank you And are you rested
Slept like a top and what did you do Did you sleep like a sensible woman
Pretty well and baby was very good Have you heard anything of Philip
Bolton thinks him rather better and says he is getting up
How long have you been up
A long time I told Arnaud to catch Markham when he came up as he always does in a morning to see after Philip and I have had a conference with him and Bolton so that I can lay the case before Dr Mayerne scientifically
What do you think of it
I think we came at the right time He has been getting more and more into work in London taking no exercise and so was pretty well knocked up when he came here and this place finished it He tried to attend to business about the property but it always ended in his head growing so bad he had to leave all to Markham who by the way has been thoroughly propitiated by his anxiety for him Then he gave up entirely has not been out of doors written a note nor seen a creature the last fortnight but there he has lain by himself in the library given up to all manner of dismal thoughts without a break
How dreadful said Annabel with tears in her eyes Then he would not see Mr Ashford Surely he could have done something for him
Ill tell you what said Charles lowering his voice from what Bolton says I think he had a dread of worse than brain fever
She shuddered and was paler but did not speak
I believe continued Charles that it is one half nervous and the oppression of this place and the other half the overstraining of a head that was already in a ticklish condition I dont think there was any real danger of more than such a fever as he had at Corfu which would probably have been the death of him but I think he dreaded still worse and that his horror of seeing any one or writing to Laura arose from not knowing how far he could control his words
O I am glad we came repeated Amabel pressing her hands together
He has been doctoring himself proceeded Charles and probably has kept off the fever by strong measures but of course the more he reduced his strength the greater advantage he gave to what was simply low spirits He must have had a terrible time of it and where it would have ended I cannot guess but it seems to me that most likely now that he is once roused he will come right again
Just as Charles had finished speaking he came down looking extremely ill weak and suffering but calmed and resting on that entire dependence on Amabel which had sprung up at Recoara
She would not let him go back to his gloomy library but made him lie on the sofa in the sittingroom and sat there herself as she thought a little quiet conversation between her and Charles would be the best thing for him She wrote to Laura and he sent a message for he could not yet attempt to write and Charles wrote reports to his mother and Dr Mayerne a little talk now and then going on about family matters
Amabel asked Philip if he knew that Mr Thorndale was at Kilcoran
Yes he said he believed there was a letter from him but his eyes had ached too much of late to read
Mrs Ashford sent in to ask whether Lady Morville would like to see her Amabels face flushed and she proposed going to her in the library but Philip disliking Amys absence more than the sight of a visitor begged she might come to the sittingroom
The Ashfords had been surprised beyond measure at the tidings that Lady Morville had actually come to Redclyffe and had been very slow to believe it but when convinced by Markhams own testimony Mrs Ashfords first idea had been to go and see if she could be any help to the poor young thing in that great desolate house whither Mrs Ashford had not been since just a year ago Markham had conducted her to admire his preparations There was much anxiety too about Mr Morville of whose condition Markham had been making a great mystery and on her return Mr Ashford was very eager for her report
Mr Morville she said did look and seem very far from well but Lady Morville had told her they hoped it was chiefly from over fatigue and that rest would soon restore him Lady Morville herself was a fragile delicate creature very sweet looking but so gentle and shrinking apparently that it gave the impression of her having no character at all not what Mrs Ashford would have expected Sir Guy to choose She had spoken very little and the chief of the conversation had been sustained by her brother
I was very much taken with that young Mr Edmonstone said Mrs Ashford he is about threeandtwenty sadly crippled but with such a pleasing animated face and so extremely agreeable and sensible I do not wonder at Sir Guys enthusiastic way of talking of him I could almost fancy it was admiration of the brother transferred to the sister
Then after all you are disappointed in her and dont lament like Markham that she is not mistress here
No I wont say I am disappointed she is a very sweet creature O yes very but far too soft and helpless for such a charge as this property unless she had her father or brother to help her But I must tell you that she took me to see her baby a nice little lively thing poor little dear and when we were alone she spoke rather more begged me to send her godson to see her thanked me for coming but crying stopped her from saying more I could grow very fond of her No I dont wonder at him for there is a great charm in anything so soft and dependent
Decidedly Mary Ross had been right when she said that except Sir Guy there was no one so difficult to know as Amy
In the afternoon Charles insisted on Amabels going out for fresh air and exercise and she liked the idea of a solitary wandering but Philip to her surprise offered to come with her and she was too glad to see him exert himself to regret the musings she had hoped for so out they went after opening the window to give Charles what he called an airing and he said that in addition he should hirple about a little to explore the groundfloor of the house
We must contrive some way for him to drive out said Philip as he crossed the court with Amabel and you too There is no walk here but up hill or down
Uphill they went along the path leading up the green slope from which the salt wind blew refreshingly In a few minutes Amabel found herself on a spot which thrilled her all over
There lay before her Guys own Redclyffe bay the waves lifting their crests and breaking the surge resounding the seabirds skimming round the Shag Rock dark and rugged the scene which seemed above all the centre of his home affections which he had so longed to show her that it had cost him an effort on his deathbed to resign the hope the leaping waves that he said he would not change for the whiteheaded mountains And now he was lying among those southern mountains and she stood in the spot where he had loved to think of seeing her and with Philip by her side His sea his own dear sea the vision of which had cheered his last day like the face of a dear old friend his sea rippling and glancing on unknowing that the eyes that had loved it so well would gaze on it no more the wind that he had longed for to cool his fevered brow the rock which had been like a playmate in his boyhood and where he had perilled his life and rescued so many It was one of the seasons when a whole gush of fresh perceptions of his feelings like a new meeting with himself would come on her her best of joys and there she stood gazing fixedly her black veil fluttering in the wind and her hands pressed close together till Philip little knowing what the sight was to her shivered saying it was very cold and windy and without hesitation she turned away feeling that now Redclyffe was precious indeed
She brought her mind back to listen while Philip was considering of means of taking Charles out of doors he supposed there might be some vehicle about the place but he thought there was no horse Very unlike was this to the exact Philip The great range of stables was before them where the Morvilles had been wont to lodge their horses as sumptuously as themselves and Amabel proposed to go and see what they could find but nothing was there but emptiness till they came to a pony in one stall a goat in another and one wheelbarrow in the coachhouse
On leaving it under the longsheltered sunny wall they came in sight of a meeting between the baby taking the air in Annes arms and Markham who had been hovering about all day anxious to know how matters were going on His back was towards them so that he was unconscious of their approach and they saw how he spoke to Anne looked fixedly at the child made her laugh and finally took her in his arms as he had so often carried her father studying earnestly her little face As soon as he saw them coming he hastily gave her back to Anne as if ashamed to be thus caught but he was obliged to grunt and put his hand up to his shaggy eyelashes before he could answer Amabels greeting
He could hardly believe his eyes that here was Mr Morville who yesterday was scarcely able to raise his head from the pillow and could attend to nothing He could not think what Lady Morville had done to him when he heard him inquiring and making arrangements about sending for a pony carriage appearing thoroughly roused and the dread of being seen or spoken to entirely passed away Markham was greatly rejoiced for Mr Morvilles illness helplessness and dependence upon himself had softened and won him to regard him kindly as nothing else would have done and his heart was entirely gained when after they had wished him goodbye he saw Philip and Amabel walk on overtake Anne Amy take the baby and hold her up to Philip who looked at her with the same earnest interest From thenceforward Markham knew that Redclyffe was nothing but a burden to Mr Morville and he could bear to see it in his possession since like himself he seemed to regard Sir Guys daughter like a disinherited princess
This short walk fatigued Philip thoroughly He slept till dinnertime and when he awoke said it was the first refreshing dreamless sleep he had had for weeks His head was much better and at dinner he had something like an appetite
It was altogether a day of refreshment and so were the ensuing ones Each day Philip became stronger and resumed more of his usual habits From writing a few lines in Amabels daily letter to Laura he proceeded to filling the envelope and from being put to sleep by Charless reading to reading aloud the whole evening himself The pony carriage was set up and he drove Charles out every day Amabel being then released from attending him and free to enjoy herself in her own way in rambles about the house and park and discoveries of the old haunts she knew so well by description
She early found her way to Guys own room where she would walk up and down with her child in her arms talking to her and holding up to her to be admired the treasures of his boyhood that Mrs Drew delighted to keep in order One day when alone in the sittingroom she thought of trying the piano he had chosen for her It was locked but the key was on her own splitring where he had put it for her the day he returned from London She opened it and it so happened that the first note she struck reminded her of one of the peculiarly sweet and deep tones of Guys voice It was like awaking its echo again and as it died away she hid her face and wept But from that time the first thing she did when her brother and cousin were out was always to bring down her little girl and play to her watching how she enjoyed the music
Little Mary prospered in the sea air gained colour took to springing and laughing and her intelligent lively way of looking about brought out continually more likeness to her father Amabel herself was no longer drooping and pining her step grew light and elastic a shade of pink returned to her cheek and the length of walk she could take was wonderful considering her weakness in the summer Every day she stood on the cliff and looked at Guys sea before setting out to visit the cottages and hear the fond rough recollections of Sir Guy or to wander far away into the woods or on the moor and find the way to the places he had loved One day when Philip and Charles came in from a drive they overtook her in the court her cloak over her arm her crape limp with spray her cheeks brightened to a rosy glow by the wind and a real smile as she looked up to them When Charles was on his sofa she stooped over him and whispered James and Ben Robinson have taken me out to the Shag
She saw Mr Wellwood and heard a good account of Coombe Prior She made great friends with the Ashfords especially little Lucy and the baby She delighted in visits to the cottages and Charles every day wondered where was the drooping dejection that she could not shake off at home She would have said that in Guys own home the joy had come to her no longer in fitful gleams and held by an effort for a moment but steadily brightening She missed him indeed but the power of finding rest in looking forward to meeting him the pleasure of dwelling on the days he had been with her and the satisfaction of doing his work for the present had made a happiness for her and still in him quiet grave and subdued but happiness likely to bloom more and more brightly throughout her life The anniversary of his death was indeed a day of tears but the tears were blessed ones and she was more full of the feeling that had sustained her on that morning than she had been through all the year before
Charles and Philip meanwhile proceeded excellently together each very anxious for the comfort of the other Philip was a good deal overwhelmed at first by the quantity of business on his hands and setting about it while his head was still weak would have seriously hurt himself again if Charles had not come to his help worked with a thorough good will great clearness and acuteness and surprised Philip by his cleverness and perseverance He was elated at being of so much use and begged to be considered for the future as Philips private secretary to which the only objection was that his handwriting was as bad as Philips was good but it was an arrangement so much to the benefit of both parties that it was gladly made Philip was very grateful for such valuable assistance and Charles amused himself with triumphing in his importance when he should sit in state on his sofa at Hollywell surrounded with bluebooks getting up the statistics for some magnificent speech of the honourable member for Moorworth
In the meantime Charles and Amabel saw no immediate prospect of their party returning from Ireland and thought it best to remain at Redclyffe since Philip had so much to do there and besides events were occurring at Kilcoran which would have prevented his visit even without his illness
One of the first drives that Charles and Philip took after the latter was equal to any exertion was to Thorndale There Charles was much amused by the manner in which Philip was received and he himself for his sake and as he said to Amabel on his return there was no question now that the blame of spoiling Philip did not solely rest at Hollywell
Finding only Lady Thorndale at home and hearing that Lord Thorndale was in the grounds Philip went out to look for him leaving Charles on the sofa under her ladyships care Charles with a little exaggeration professed that he had never been so flattered in his whole life as he was by the compliments that reflected on him as the future brotherinlaw of Philip and that he had really begun to think even Laura not half sensible enough of her own happiness Lady Thorndale afterwards proceeded to inquiries about the De Courcy family especially Lady Eveleen and Charles enlightened by Charlotte took delight in giving a brilliant description of his cousins charms for which he was rewarded by very plain intimations of the purpose for which her son James was gone to Kilcoran
On talking the visit over as they drove home Charles asked Philip if he had guessed at his friends intentions Yes he answered
Then you never took the credit of it Why did you not tell us
I knew it from himself in confidence
Oh said Charles amusing himself with the notion of the young mans dutifully asking the permission of his companion unshaken in allegiance though the staff might be broken and the book drowned deeper than did ever plummet sound Philip spoke no more and Charles would ask no more for Philips own affairs of the kind were not such as to encourage talking of other peoples No explanation was needed why he should now promote an attachment which he had strongly disapproved while James Thorndale was still in the army
A day or two after however came a letter from Charlotte bringing further news at which Charles was so amazed that he could not help communicating it at once to his companions
So Eveleen wont have him
What exclaimed both
You dont mean that she has refused Thorndale said Philip
Even so said Charles Charlotte says he is gone Poor Mr Thorndale left us this morning after a day of private conferences in which he seems to have had no satisfaction for his resolute dignity and determination to be agreeable all the evening were—ahem—were great Mabel cannot get at any of the real reasons from Eveleen though I think I could help her but I cant tell you
Charlotte means mischief said Charles as he concluded
I am very sorry said Philip I did think Lady Eveleen would have been able to estimate Thorndale It will be a great disappointment—the inclination has been of long standing Poor Thorndale
It would have been a very good thing for Eva said Amabel Mr Thorndale is such a sensible man
And I thought his steady sense just what was wanting to bring out all her good qualities that are running to waste in that irregular home said Philip What can have possessed her
Ay something must have possessed her said Charles Eva was always ready to be fallen in love with on the shortest notice and if there was not something prior in her imagination Thorndale would not have had much difficulty By the bye depend upon it tis the tutor
Philip looked a little startled but instantly reassuring himself said—
George Fielder Impossible You have never seen him
Ah dont you remember her description said Amy in a low voice rather sadly
The very reason Amy said Charles it showed that he had attracted her fancy
Philip smiled a little incredulously
Ay said Charles you may smile but you handsome men can little appreciate the attractiveness of an interesting ugliness It is the way to be looked at in the end Mark my words it is the tutor
I hope not said Philip as if shaken in his confidence Any way it is a bad affair I am very much concerned for Thorndale
So sincerely concerned that his head began to ache in the midst of some writing He was obliged to leave it to Charles to finish and go out to walk with Amy
Amabel came in before him and began to talk to Charles about his great vexation at his friends disappointment
I am almost sorry you threw out that hint about Mr Fielder said she Dont you remember how he was recommended
Ah I had forgotten it was Philips doing a bit of his spirit of opposition said Charles Were not the boys to have gone to Coombe Prior
Yes said Amabel that is the thing that seems to have made him so unhappy about it I am sure I hope it is not true she added considering for Charlie you must know that Guy had an impression against him
Had he said Charles anxiously
It was only an impression nothing he could accuse him of or mention to Lord Kilcoran He would have told no one but me but he had seen something of him at Oxford and thought him full of conversation very clever only not the sort of talk he liked I dont like that Charlotte concurs in testifying to his agreeableness and in the dearth of intellect I should not wonder at Evas taking up with him He would be a straw to the drowning It looks dangerous
They were very anxious for further intelligence but received none except that Philip had a letter from his friend on which his only comment was a deep sigh and Poor Thorndale She little knows what she has thrown away Letters from Kilcoran became rare Laura scarcely wrote at all to Philip and though Mrs Edmonstone wrote as usual she did not notice the subject while Charlottes gravity and constraint when she did achieve a letter to Charles were in such contrast to her usual free and wouldbe satirical style that such eyes as her brothers could hardly fail to see that something was on her mind
So it went on week after week Charles and Amabel wondering when they should ever have any notice to go home and what their family could be doing in Ireland October had given place to November and more than a week of November had passed and here they still were without anything like real tidings
At last came a letter from Mrs Edmonstone which Amabel could not read without one little cry of surprise and dismay and then had some difficulty in announcing its contents to Philip
Kilcoran Nov 8th
My Dearest Amy—You will be extremely surprised at what I have to tell you and no less grieved It has been a most unpleasant disgraceful business from beginning to end and the only comfort in it to us is the great discretion and firmness that Charlotte has shown I had better however begin at the beginning and tell you the history as far as I understand it myself You know that Mr James Thorndale has been here and perhaps you know it was for the purpose of making an offer to Eveleen Every one was much surprised at her refusing him and still more when after much prevarication it came out that the true motive was her attachment to Mr Fielder the tutor It appeared that they had been secretly engaged for some weeks ever since they had perceived Mr Thorndales intentions and not as it was in poor Lauras case an unavowed attachment but an absolute engagement And fancy Eva justifying it by Lauras example There was of course great anger and confusion Lord Kilcoran was furious poor Lady Kilcoran had nervous attacks the gentleman was dismissed from the house and supposed to be gone to England Eva shed abundance of tears but after a great deal of vehemence she appeared subdued and submissive We were all very sorry for her as there is much that is very agreeable and likely to attract her in Mr Fielder and she always had too much mind to be wasted in such a life as she leads here It seemed as if Laura was a comfort to her and Lady Kilcoran was very anxious we should stay as long as possible This was all about three weeks or a month ago Eva was recovering her spirits and I was just beginning a letter to tell you we hoped to be at home in another week when Charlotte came into my room in great distress to tell me that Eveleen and Mr Fielder were on the verge of a runaway marriage Charlotte had been coming back alone from a visit to grandmamma and going down a path out of the direct way to recall Bustle who had run on she said as if he scented mischief came to her great astonishment on Eveleen walking arminarm with Mr Fielder Charlie will fancy how Charlotte looked at them They shuffled and tried to explain it away but Charlotte was too acute for them or rather she held steadily to be that as it may Lord Kilcoran ought to know it They tried to frighten her with the horrors of betraying secrets but she said none had been confided to her and mamma would judge They tried to persuade her it was the way of all lovers and appealed to Laura s example but there little Charlotte was less to be shaken than on any point I did not think them worthy to hear their names she said to me but I told them that I had seen that the truest and deepest of love had a horror of all that was like wrong and as to Philip and Laura they little knew what they had suffered besides theirs was not half so bad I verily believe these were the very words she used to them At last Eva threw herself on her mercy and begged so vehemently that she would only wait another day that she suspected and with sharpness very like Charlies forced from Eva that they were to marry the next morning Then she said it would be a great deal better that they should abuse her and call her a spy than do what they would repent of all their lives she begged Evas pardon and cried so much that Eva was in hopes she would relent and then came straight to me very unhappy and not in the least triumphant in her discovery You can guess what a dreadful afternoon we had I dont think any one was more miserable than poor Charlotte who stayed shut up in my room all day dreading the sight of any one and expecting to be universally called a traitor The end was that after much storming Lord Kilcoran finding Eveleen determined and anxious to save her the discredit of an elopement has agreed to receive Mr Fielder and they are to be married from this house on the 6th of December though what they are to live upon no one can guess The Kilcorans are very anxious to put the best face on the matter possible and have persuaded us for the sake of the family to stay for the wedding indeed poor Lady Kilcoran is so completely overcome that I hardly like to leave her till this is over How unpleasant the state of things in the house is no one can imagine and very very glad shall I be to get back to Hollywell and my Amy and Charlie Dearest Amy
Your most affectionate
L EDMONSTONE
The news was at length told and Philip was indeed thunderstruck at this fresh consequence of his interference It threatened at first to overthrow his scarcely recovered spirits and but for the presence of his guests it seemed as if it might have brought on a renewal of the state from which they had restored him
Yes said Charles to Amy when they talked it over alone It seems as if good people could do wrong with less impunity than others It is rather like the saying about fools and angels Lightminded people see the sin but not the repentance so they imitate the one without being capable of the other Here are Philip and Laura finishing off like the end of a novel fortune and all and setting a very bad example to the world in general
As the world cannot see below the surface said Amy how distressed Laura must be You see mamma does not say one word about her
Philip had not much peace till he had written to Mr Thorndale who was going at once to Germany not liking to return home to meet the condolences Mrs Edmonstone had nearly the whole correspondence of the family on her hands for neither of her daughters liked to write and she gave the description of the various uncomfortable scenes that took place Lord de Courcys stern and enduring displeasure and his fathers fast subsiding violence Lady Kilcorans distress and the younger girls excitement and amusement but she said she thought the very proper and serious way in which Charlotte viewed it would keep it from doing them much harm provided as was much to be feared Lord Kilcoran did not end by keeping the pair always at home living upon him till Mr Fielder could get a situation In fact it was difficult to know what other means there were of providing for them
At last the wedding took place and Mrs Edmonstone wrote a letter divided between indignation at the foolish display that had attended it and satisfaction at being able at length to fix the day for the meeting at Hollywell No one could guess how she longed to be at home again and to be once more with Charlie
Nor were Charles and Amabel less ready to go home though they could both truly say that they had much enjoyed their stay at Redclyffe Philip was to come with them and it was privately agreed that he should return to Redclyffe no more till he could bring Laura with him Amabel had talked of her sister to Mrs Ashford and done much to smooth the way and even on the last day or two held a few consultations with Philip as to the arrangements that Laura would like One thing however she must ask for her own pleasure Philip said she you must let me have this piano
His answer was by look and gesture
And I want very much to ask a question Philip Will you tell me which is Sir Hughs picture
You have been sitting opposite to it every day at dinner
That exclaimed Amy From what I heard I fully expected to have known Sir Hughs in a moment and I often looked at that one but I never could see more likeness than there is in almost all the pictures about the house
She went at once to study it again and wondered more
I have seen him sometimes look like it but it is not at all the strong likeness I expected
Philip stood silently gazing and certainly the countenance he recalled pleading with him to desist from his wilfulness and bending over him in his sickness was far unlike in expression to the fiery youth before him In a few moments more Amabel had run upstairs and brought down Mr Shenes portrait There was proved to be more resemblance than either of them had at first sight credited The form of the forehead nose and short upper lip were identical so were the sharplydefined black eyebrows the colour of the eyes and the way of standing in both had a curious similarity but the expression was so entirely different that strict comparison alone proved that Guys animated contemplative and most winning countenance was in its original lineaments entirely the same with that of his ancestor Although Sir Hughs was then far from unprepossessing and bore as yet no trace of his unholy passions it bought to Amabels mind the shudder with which Guy had mentioned his likeness to that picture and seemed to show her the nature he had tamed
Philip meanwhile after one glance at Mr Shenes portrait which he had not before seen had turned away and stood leaning against the windowframe When Amy had finished her silent comparison and was going to take her treasure back he looked up and said Do you dislike leaving that with me for a few minutes
Keep it as long as you like said she going at once and she saw him no more till nearly an hour after when as she was coming out of her own room he met her and gave it into her hands saying nothing except a smothered Thank you but his eyelids were so swollen and heavy that Charles feared his head was bad again while Amy was glad to perceive that he had had the comfort of tears
Every one was sorry to wish Lady Morville and her brother goodbye only consoling themselves with hoping that their sister might be like them and as to little Mary the attention paid to her was so devoted and universal that her mamma thought it very well she should receive the first ardour of it while she was too young to have her head turned
They again slept a night in London and in the morning Philip took Charles for a drive through the places he had heard of and was much edified by actually beholding They were safely at home the same evening and on the following the Hollywell party was once more complete gathered round Charless sofa in a confusion of welcomes and greetings
Mrs Edmonstone could hardly believe her eyes so much had Charless countenance lost its invalid look and his movements were so much more active Amabel too though still white and thin had a life in her eye and an air of health most unlike her languor and depression
Every one looked well and happy but Laura and she had a worn faded harassed aspect which was not cheered even by Philips presence indeed she seemed almost to shrink from speaking to him She was the only silent one of the party that evening as they gathered round the dinner or teatable or sat divided into threes or pairs talking over the subjects that would not do to be discussed in public Charlotte generally niched into Amys old corner by Charles hearing about Redclyffe or telling about Ireland Mrs Edmonstone and Amy on the opposite sides of the ottoman their heads meeting over the central cushion talking in low fond inaudible tones Mr Edmonstone going in and out of the room and joining himself to one or other group telling and hearing news and sometimes breaking up the pairs and then Mrs Edmonstone came to congratulate Charles on Amys improved looks or Charlotte pressed up close to Amy to tell her about grandmamma For Charlotte could not talk about Eveleen she had been so uncomfortable at the part she had had to act that all the commendation she received was only like pain and shame and her mother was by no means dissatisfied that it should be so since a degree of forwardness had been her chief cause of anxiety in Charlotte and it now appeared that without losing her high spirit and uncompromising sense of right her sixteenth year was bringing with it feminine reserve
Laura lingered late in Amabels room and when her mother had wished them good night and left them together she exclaimed Oh Amy I am so glad to be come back to you I have been so very miserable
But you see he is quite well said Amy We think him looking better than in the summer
O yes Oh Amy what have you not done If you could guess the relief of hearing you were with him after that suspense But as if losing that subject in one she was still more eager about What did he think of me
My dear said Amabel I dont think I am the right person to tell you that
You saw how it struck him when he heard of my share in it
Yours Mamma never mentioned you
Always kind said Laura Oh Amy what will you think of me when I tell I knew poor Evas secret all the time What could I do when Eva pleaded my own case It was very different but she would not see it and I felt as if I was guilty of all Oh how I envied Charlotte
Dear Laura no wonder you were unhappy
Nothing hitherto has been equal to it said Laura There was the misery of his silence and the anxiety that you dearest freed me from then no sooner was that over than this was confided to me Think what I felt when Eva put me in mind of a time when I argued in favour of some such concealment in a novel No you can never guess what I went through knowing that he would think me weak blameable unworthy
Nay he blames himself too much to blame you
No that he must not do It was my fault from the beginning If I had but gone at once to mamma
Oh I am so glad exclaimed Amy suddenly
Glad
I mean said Amy looking down now you have said that I am sure you will be happier
Happier now I feel and see how I have lowered myself even in his sight said Laura drooping her head and hiding her face in her hands as she went on in so low a tone that Amy could hardly hear her I know it all now He loves me still as he must whatever he has once taken into that deep deep heart of his he will always but he cannot have that honouring trusting confiding love that—you enjoyed and deserved Amy—that he would have had if I had cared first for what became me If I had only at first told mamma he would not even have been blamed he would have been spared half this suffering and selfreproach he would have loved me more Eva might not have been led astray at least she could not have laid it to my charge—and I could lift up my head she finished as she hung it almost to her knees
Her sister raised the head laid it on her own bosom and kissed the cheeks and brow again and again Dearest dearest Laura I am so sorry for you but I am sure you must feel freer and happier now you know it all and see the truth
I dont know said Laura sadly
And at least you will be better able to comfort him
No no I shall only add to his selfreproach He will see more plainly what a wretched weak creature he fancied had firmness and discretion Oh what a broken reed I have been to him
There is strength and comfort for us all to lean upon said Amy But you ought to go to bed Shall I read to you Laura you are so tired I should like to come and read you to sleep
Laura was not given to concealments that fatal one had been her only insincerity and she never thought of doing otherwise than telling the whole of her conduct in Ireland to Philip She sat alone with him the next morning explained all and entreated his pardon humiliating herself so much that he could not bear to hear her
It was the fault of our whole lifetime Laura said he recovering himself when a few agitated words had passed on either side I taught you to take my dictum for law and abused your trusty and perverted all the best and most precious qualities It is I who stand first to bear the blame and would that I could bear all the suffering But as it is Laura we must look to enduring the consequence all our lives and give each other what support we may
Laura could hardly brook his selfaccusation but she could no longer argue the point and there was far more peace and truth before them than when she believed him infallible and therefore justified herself for all she had done in blind obedience to him
CHAPTER 44
Thus souls by nature pitched too high
By sufferings plunged too low
Meet in the churchs middle sky
Halfway twixt joy and woe
To practise there the soothing lay
That sorrow best relieves
Thankful for all God takes away
Humbled by all He gives
—CHRISTIAN YEAR
One Afternoon late in April Charles opened the dressingroom door and paused a moment smiling There sat Amabel on the floor before the fire her hand stretched out playfully holding back the little one who with scanty flossy silken curls hazel eyes and jetblack lashes plump mottled arms and tiny tottering feet stood crowing and shouting in exulting laughter having just made a triumphant clutch at her mammas hair and pulled down all the light shining locks while under their shade the reddening smiling face recalled the Amy of days long gone by
Thats right cried Charles delighted pull it all down Out with mammas own curls again
No I can never wear my curls again said Amy so mournfully that he was sorry he had referred to them and perceiving this she smiled sweetly and pulling a tress to its full length showed how much too short it was for anything but being put plainly under the cap to which she restored it
Is Mrs Henley come she asked
As large as life and that is saying a good deal She would make two of Philip As tall and twice as broad I thought Juno herself was advancing on me from the station
How did you get on with her
Famously I told her all about everything and how the affair is to be really quiet which she had never believed She could hardly believe my word when I told her there was to be absolutely no one but ourselves and Mary Ross She supposed it was for your sake and I did not tell her it was for their own It really was providential that the Kilcoran folk disgusted my father with grand weddings for Philip never could endure one
Oh Miss Mischief there goes my hair again You know Philip is exceedingly worried about Mr Fielder Lord Kilcoran has been writing to ask him to find him a situation
That is an article they will be seeking all the rest of their lives said Charles A man is done for when he begins to look for a situation Yes those Fielders will be a drag on Philip and Laura for ever for they dont quite like to cast them off feeling as he does that he led to her getting into the scrape by recommending him and poor Laura thinking she set the example
I wish Eva was away from home said Amy for Aunt Charlottes accounts of her vex Laura so much
Ay trying to eat her cake and have it expecting to be Mr Fielders wife and reign as the earls daughter all the same Poor thing the day they get the situation will be a sad one for her She does not know what poortith cauld will be like
Poor Eva said Amy I dare say she will shine and be all the better for trouble There is much that is so very nice in her
Ay if she has not spoilt it all by this time—as that creature is doing with your hair You little monkey what have you to say to me
Only to wish you good night Come baby we must go to Anne Good night Uncle Charles
Just as Amabel had borne off her little girl Mrs Edmonstone and Charlotte came in after conducting Mrs Henley to her room Charlotte made a face of wonder and dismay and Mrs Edmonstone asked where Amy was
She carried the baby to the nursery just before you came I wish you had seen her The little thing had pulled down her hair and made her look so pretty and like herself
How well her spirits keep up She has been running up and down stairs all day helping about everything Well we little thought how things would turn out
And that after all Amy would be the homebird said Charles I dont feel as if it was wrong to rejoice in having her in this sweet shady brightness as she is now
Do you know whether she means to go to church tomorrow I dont like to ask
Nor I
I know she does said Charlotte She told me so
I hope it will not be too much for her Dear Amy
She would say it was wrong to have our heads fuller of her than of our bride said Charles
Poor Laura said Mrs Edmonstone I am glad it is all right at last They have both gone through a great deal
And not in vain added Charles Philip is—
Oh I say not a word against him cried Mrs Edmonstone He is most excellent he will be very distinguished—he will make her very happy Yes
In fact said Charles he is made to be one of the first in this world and to be first by being above it and the only reason we are almost discontented is that we compare him with one who was too good for this world
It is not only that
Ah you did not see him at Redclyffe or you would do more than simply forgiving him as a Christian
I am very sorry for him
That is not quite enough said Charles smiling with a mischievous air though fully in earnest Is it Charlotte She must take him home to her mammas own heart
No no that is asking too much Charlie said Mrs Edmonstone Only one ever was— then breaking off—and I can never think of Philip as I used to do
I like him much better now said Charlotte
For my part said Charles I never liked him—nay thats too mild I could not abide him I rebelled against him heart soul and taste If it had not been for Guy his fashion of goodness would have made me into an extract of gall and wormwood at the very time you admired him and yet a great deal of it was genuine But it is only now that I have liked him Nay I look up to him I think him positively noble and grand and when I see proofs of his being entirely repentant I perceive he is a thorough great man If I had not seen one greater I should follow his young mans example and take him for my hero model
As if you wanted a hero model whispered Charlotte in a tone between caressing and impertinence
Ive had one returned Charles also aside
Yes said Mrs Edmonstone going on with her own thoughts unless there had been a great fund of real goodness he would never have felt it so deeply Indeed even when I best liked Philip I never thought him capable of such repentance as he has shown
If mamma wants to like him very much said Charlotte I think she has only to look at our other company
Ay said Charles we want no more explanation of the tone of the Thank you with which he answered the offer to invite his sister
One comfort is she cant stay long She has got a committee meeting for the Ladies Literary and Scientific Association and must go home for it the day after tomorrow said Charlotte
If you are very good perhaps she will give you a ticket Charlotte said her brother and another for Bustle
Mrs Henley was meanwhile highly satisfied with the impression she thought she was making on her aunts family especially on Charles and Charlotte The latter she patronized to her extreme though suppressed indignation as a clever promising girl the former, she discovered to be a very superior young man a most valuable assistant to her brother in his business and her selfcomplacency prevented her from finding out how he was playing her off whenever neither Philip nor Laura were at hand to be hurt by it
She thought Laura a finelooking person like her own family and fit to be an excellent lady of the house and in spite of the want of fortune she perceived that her brothers choice had been far better than if he had married that poor pale little Amabel go silent and quiet that she never could make a figure anywhere and had nothing like the substantive character that her brother must have in a wife
Could Mrs Henley have looked behind the scenes she would have marvelled
One kiss for mamma and one for papa was Amys halfuttered morning greeting as she lifted from her cot her little one with cheeks flushed by sleep Morning and evening Amy spoke those words and was happy in the double kiss that Mary had learnt to connect with them happy too in holding her up to the picture and saying papa so that his child might never recollect a time when he had not been a familiar and beloved idea
A little play with the merry child then came Anne to take her away and with a suppressed sigh Amabel dressed for the first time without her weeds which she had promised to leave off on Lauras weddingday
No I will not sigh then she thought it does not put me further from him He would be more glad than any one this day and so I must show some sign of gladness
So she put on such a dress as would be hers for life—black silk and face cap over her still plain hair then with real pleasure she put on Charless bracelet and the silver brooch which she had last worn the evening when the echoes of Recoara had answered Guys last chant Soon she was visiting Laura cheering her soothing her agitation helping her to dress in her bridal array much plainer than Amys own had been for it had been the especial wish of both herself and Philip that their wedding should be as quiet and unlike Guys as possible Then Amabel was running downstairs to see that all was right thinking the breakfasttable looked dull and forlorn and calling Charlotte to help her to make it appear a little more festal with the aid of some flowers Charlotte wondered to see that she had forgotten how she shunned flowers last summer for there she was flitting from one old familiar plant to another in search of the choicest arranging little bouquets with her own peculiar grace and taste and putting them by each persons place in readiness to receive them
It was as if no one else could smile that morning except Mr Edmonstone who was so pleased to see her looking cheerful in her altered dress that he kissed her repeatedly and confidentially told Mrs Henley that his little Amy was a regular darling the sweetest girl in the world poor dear except Laura
Mrs Henley in the richest of all silks looked magnificent and superior Mrs Edmonstone had tears in her eyes and attended to every one softly and kindly without a word Charlotte was grave helpful and thoughtful Charles watching every one and intent on making things smooth Laura looked fixed in the forced composure which she had long ago learnt and Philip—it was late before he appeared at all and when he came down there was nothing so plainly written on his face as headache
It was so severe that the most merciful thing was to send him to lie on the sofa in the dressingroom Amabel said she would fetch him some camphor and disappeared while Laura sat still with her forced composure Her father fidgeted only restrained by her presence from expressing his fears that Philip was too unwell for the marriage to take place today and Charles talked cheerfully of the great improvement in his general health saying this was but a chance thing and that on the whole he might be considered as quite restored
Mrs Henley listened and answered but could not comprehend the state of things Breakfast was over when she heard Amabel speaking to Laura in the anteroom
It will go off soon Here is a cup of hot coffee for you to take him Ill call you when it is time to go
Amabel and Charlotte were very busy looking after Lauras packing up and putting all that was wanted into the carriage in which the pair were to set off at once from church without returning to Hollywell
At the last moment she went to warn Philip it was time to go if he meant to walk to church alone the best thing for his head
It is better said Laura somewhat comforted
Much better for your bathing it thank you said Philip rising then turning to Amy—Do I wish you goodbye now
No I shall see you at church unless you dont like to have my blackness there
Would we not have our guardian angel Laura said Philip
You know he would have been there said Amy No one would have been more glad so thank you for letting me come
Thank you for coming said Laura earnestly It is a comfort
They left her and she stood a few minutes to enjoy the solitude and to look from the window at her little girl whom she had sent out with Anne She was just about to open the window to call to her and make her look up with one of her merry shouts of Mamma when Philip came out at the gardendoor and was crossing the lawn Mary was very fond of him flattered by the attention of the tallest person in the house and she stretched her arms and gave a cry of summons Amabel watched him turn instantly take her from her nurse and hold her in a close embrace whilst her little round arms met round his neck She was unwilling to be restored to Anne and when he left she looked up in his face and unprompted held up to him the primroses and violets in her hand
Those flowers were in his coat when Amabel saw him again at church and she knew that this spontaneous proof of affection from Guys little unconscious child was more precious to him than all the kindnesses she could bestow
Little space was there for musing for it was high time to set off for church Mary Ross met the party at the wicket of the churchyard took Charles on her arm and by look and sign inquired for Amy
Bright outwardly he answered and I think so inwardly Nothing does her so much good as to represent him Did you wonder to see her
No said Mary I thought she would come It is the crowning point of his forgiveness
Such forgiveness that she has forgotten there is anything to forgive said Charles
Philip Morville and Laura Edmonstone stood before Mr Ross It was not such a wedding as the last There was more personal beauty but no such air of freshness youth and peace He was indeed a very finelooking man his countenance more noble than it had ever been though pale and not only betraying the present suffering of the throbbing burning brow but with the appearance of a careworn harassed man looking more as if his age was fiveandthirty than eightandtwenty And she in her plain white muslin and quiet bonnet was hardly bridallooking in dress and so it was with her face still beautiful and brilliant in complexion but with the weight of care permanent on it and all the shades of feeling concealed by a fixed command of countenance unable however to hide the oppression of dejection and anxiety
Yet to the eyes that only beheld the surface there was nothing but prosperity and happiness in a marriage between a pair who had loved so long and devotedly and after going through so much for each others sake were united at length with wealth honour and distinction before them His health was reestablished and the last spring had proved that his talents would place him in such a position as had been the very object of his highest hopes Was not everything here for which the fondest and most aspiring wishes could seek Yet for the very reason that there was sadness at almost every heart not one tear was shed Mrs Edmonstones thoughts were less engrossed with the bride than with the young slender figure in black standing in her own drooping way her head bent down and the fingers of her right hand clasping tight her weddingring through her white glove
The service was over Laura hung round her mothers neck in an ardent embrace
Your pardon O mamma I see it all now
Poor thing she had too much failed in a daughters part to go forth from her home with the clear loving hopeful heart her sister had carried from it Mrs Edmonstones kiss was a full answer however a kiss unlike what it had been with all her efforts for many and many a month
Amy pray that it may not be visited were the last words breathed to her sister as they were pressed in each others arms
Philip scarcely spoke only met their kindnesses with grateful gestures and looks and brief replies and the parting was hastened that he might as soon as possible be at rest His only voluntary speech was as he bade farewell to Amabel—
My sister now
And his brother she answered Goodbye
As soon as Amabel was alone in the carriage with Charles she leant back and gave way to a flood of tears
Amy has it been too much
No she said recovering herself but I am so glad It was his chief desire Now everything he wished is fulfilled
And you are free of your great charge He has been a considerable care to you but now he is safe on Lauras hands and well and satisfactory so you have no care but your daughter and we settle into our home life
Amabel smiled
Amy I do wish I was sure you are happy
Yes dear Charlie indeed I am You are all so very kind to me and it is a blessing indeed that my own dear home can open to take in me and baby You know he liked giving me back to you
And it is happiness not only thinking it ought to be Dont let me tease you Amy dont answer if you had rather not
Thank you Charlie it is happiness It must be when I remember how very happy he used to be and there can be nothing to spoil it When I see how all the duties of his station worry and perplex Philip I am glad he was spared from it and had all his freshness and brightness his whole life It beams out on me more now and it was such perfect happiness while I had him here and it is such a pleasure and honour to be called by his name besides there is baby Oh Charlie I must be happy—I am do believe it Indeed you know I have you and mamma and all too And Charlie I think he made you all precious to me over again by the way he loved you all and sent me back to you especially Yes Charlie you must not fancy I grieve I am very happy for he is and all I have is made bright and precious by him
Yes said he looking at her as the colour had come into her face and she looked perfectly lovely with eager sincere happiness one of her husbands sweetest looks reflected on her face altogether such a picture of youth joy and love as had not been displayed by the bride that morning Amy I dont believe anything could make you long unhappy
Nothing but my own fault Nothing else can part me from him she whispered almost to herself
Yes no one else had such a power of making happy said Charles thoughtfully Amy I really dont know whether even you owe as much to your husband as I do You were good for something before but when I look back on what I was when first he came I know that his leading unconscious as it was brought out the stifled good in me What a wretch I should have been what a misery to myself and to you all by this time and now I verily believe that since he let in the sunlight from heaven on me I am better off than if I had as many legs as other people
Better off
Yes Nobody else lives in such an atmosphere of petting and has so little to plague them Nobody else has such a mamma to say nothing of silly little Amy or Charlotte or Miss Morville And as to being of no use which I used to pine about—why when the member for Moorworth governs the country I mean to govern him
I am sure you are of wonderful use to every one said Amabel neither Philip nor papa could get on without you to do their writing for them Besides I want you to help me when baby grows older
Is that the laudable result of that great book on education I saw you reading the other day said Charles Why dont you borrow a few hints from Mrs Henley
Amys clear playful laugh was just what it used to be
It is all settled then that you go on with us Not that I ever thought you were going to do anything so absurd as to set up for yourself you silly little woman but it seems to be considered right to come to a formal settlement about such a grand personage as my Lady Morville
Yes it was better to come to an understanding said Amabel It was better that papa should make up his mind to see that I cant turn into a young lady again You see Charlotte will go out with him and be the Miss Edmonstone for company and he is so proud of her liveliness and—how pretty she is growing—so that will keep him from being vexed So now you see I can go on my own way attend to baby and take Lauras business about the school and keep out of the way of company so that it is very nice and comfortable It is the very thing that Guy wished
Amabels life is here pretty well shown That of Philip and Laura may be guessed at He was a distinguished man one of the most honoured and respected in the country admired for his talents and excellence and regarded universally as highly prosperous and fortunate the pride of all who had any connection with him Yet it was a harassed anxious life with little of repose or relief and Laura spent her time between watching him and tending his health and in the cares and representation befitting her station with little space for domestic pleasure and home comfort knowing her children more intimately through her sisters observation than through her own
Perfect and devoted as ever was their love and they were thought most admirable and happy people There was some wonder at his being a grave melancholy man when he had all before him so richly to enjoy contrary to every probability when he began life Still there was one who never could understand why others should think him stern and severe and why even his own children should look up to him with love that partook of distant awe and respect one to whom he never was otherwise than indulgent nay almost reverential in the gentleness of his kindness and that was Mary Verena Morville